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Speaking of easy/poo poo tier jobs I've got a pretty sweet gig at the moment on the temp bank, it's only part time but that's what I wanted anyway Being paid eleven pounds an hour to answer maybe four emails a day and answer, oh, let's say two to three phone calls, and otherwise poo poo post for five weeks, all from home, not so bad
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Sep 24, 2021 14:54
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Failed Imagineer posted:Absolutely. I just gently caress around most of the time and get compensated relatively well for doing so and get many Good Boy points And WFH has only made it better. I used to have to at least pretend I was working at the office, and confine my dossing to the computer. Now I can go to exercise, play videogames, go to the shops, pet the cat, get drunk, and I can do it all while being completely naked
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Sep 24, 2021 14:56
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goddamnedtwisto posted:As I've pointed out multiple times in the past, I'd never work for MI5 - have you seen how poo poo public sector wages are? On the discussion of rights and pay, the government is on one hand both going through a manpower "crisis" in a bunch of public sector professions (the state needs more teachers! and soldiers! and prison staff! and police! and nurses) and also wants to hire more and more people with tech skills (work for MI5! Learn to Cyber! work on our new supercomputer!) and yet refuses to ever raise public sector pay or even not cut them. Then wonders why they can't recruit anyone or keep them once they've built up some skills. It's not like the quality workers dont exist, the government is just institutionally skinflint on paying them.
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Sep 24, 2021 14:59
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JeremoudCorbynejad posted:And WFH has only made it better. I used to have to at least pretend I was working at the office, and confine my dossing to the computer. Now I can go to exercise, play videogames, go to the shops, pet the cat, get drunk, and I can do it all while being completely naked I actually went into the office for the first time in 19months yesterday (because I was meeting my little team afterwards for drinks and work bitching). Within 5 mins of getting there I was like "Yep, this is indeed poo poo, and now you have to wear a mask everytime you walk to the loo and be paranoid all the time". Absolutely gently caress that. Petting the cat bollock-naked seems risky tho
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Sep 24, 2021 15:02
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JeremoudCorbynejad posted:And WFH has only made it better. I used to have to at least pretend I was working at the office, and confine my dossing to the computer. Now I can go to exercise, play videogames, go to the shops, pet the cat, get drunk, and I can do it all while being completely naked I don't recommend going to the shops while completely naked. For one thing, you'll have nowhere to put your wallet.
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Sep 24, 2021 15:09
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JeremoudCorbynejad posted:And WFH has only made it better. I used to have to at least pretend I was working at the office, and confine my dossing to the computer. Now I can go to exercise, play videogames, go to the shops, pet the cat, get drunk, and I can do it all while being completely naked Sir,
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Sep 24, 2021 15:09
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JeremoudCorbynejad confirmed as that lad everyone's mate once knew at a different school that got their bellend bitten by the cat.
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Sep 24, 2021 15:09
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I don't know that I would honestly mind if people came to the shop naked. For one thing it would mean I would be less likely to have to chase them for shoplifting.
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Sep 24, 2021 15:14
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OwlFancier posted:I don't know that I would honestly mind if people came to the shop naked. For one thing it would mean I would be less likely to have to chase them for shoplifting. How would you know Goony McGoon hasn't smuggled some sausage rolls our between his sausage rolls?
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Sep 24, 2021 15:18
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Prince Harry has dropped into Buckingham Palace with the Sword of Chang, by (my own) prophecy, and will avenge Diana in fire, blood, and with the commemorative revolver
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Sep 24, 2021 15:20
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Well that's the beauty of it, I don't actually care if you nick anything just don't get caught doing it, if you can conceal meat products in your meat so effectively that LP doesn't stop you then I don't have to be backup.
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Sep 24, 2021 15:21
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Jedit posted:I don't recommend going to the shops while completely naked. For one thing, you'll have nowhere to put your wallet. You could probably find somewhere to clench it.
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Sep 24, 2021 15:27
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Catzilla posted:You could probably find somewhere to clench it. *poops coins directly into the self-service checkout with comical pachinko sound effect*
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Sep 24, 2021 16:05
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According to the FT: Boris Johnson orders rapid fix to UK shortage of truck drivers https://www.ft.com/content/8335166f-9019-471b-9cbf-d7554c3b40b2 That lad does NOT like bad publicity at ALL and yet he talked about Kermit the Fog in a speech at the United Nations.  How many E.U. HGV drivers are desperate enough to return to this mad house i do no know.
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Sep 24, 2021 16:14
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Normal island. https://twitter.com/Rachael_Swindon/status/1441346644868419584?s=19
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Sep 24, 2021 16:30
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My "There is no fuel shortage!!!" t-shirt has people asking a lot of questions already answered by my shirt. https://twitter.com/JamesCleverly/status/1441407096319213579?s=20
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Sep 24, 2021 16:43
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Just Another Lurker posted:According to the FT: Boris Johnson orders rapid fix to UK shortage of truck drivers https://www.ft.com/content/8335166f-9019-471b-9cbf-d7554c3b40b2 Britain blew billions on Bozza's brexit to block those bloody Balkans blagging Brenda bucks but the buggers are back
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Sep 24, 2021 16:44
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The best job I ever had was as a census checker for the ONS. After the census, random postcodes are selected to basically have someone go round and do it again, to see how accurate the original was. I was paid for 37.5 hours per week, entirely unmonitored, and my job was dependent on people answering the door. Oh and started from the minute I left home to the minute I got back. Fancy a lie in? Yeah poo poo, no one answered the door, what’s to be done? My usual schedule was to turn up a couple of hours into the shift, knock a few doors for approx 1h30, go and have a pub lunch for a few hours, knock the rest of them for an hour then go home a few hours early. It was absolutely loving awesome
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Sep 24, 2021 16:44
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Well, this was not a good day for my wife to ring up and say "Did you fill up the car when you went out this morning?" Because I didn't (even though it only had about 23 miles to empty) because I'm lazy, and for some reason there was a major jam near the local petrol station...
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Sep 24, 2021 16:44
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Jakabite posted:The best job I ever had was as a census checker for the ONS. After the census, random postcodes are selected to basically have someone go round and do it again, to see how accurate the original was. I was paid for 37.5 hours per week, entirely unmonitored, and my job was dependent on people answering the door. Oh and started from the minute I left home to the minute I got back. Fancy a lie in? Yeah poo poo, no one answered the door, what’s to be done? I wish I wasn't such a spineless wuss cos I'd never have the guts to totally gently caress off a job like that This job I'm doing now is completely reactive so I genuinely don't have anything to do when nothing comes in, which is why I only feel moderately guilty about spending a good whack of the afternoon watching Star Wars Visions
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Sep 24, 2021 16:49
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Never feel guilty for shirking your work as long as it doesn’t affect your fellow workers. Being paid to do what you like is a revolutionary act, comrade. As a certain captain once said: take what you can, give nothing back.
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Sep 24, 2021 16:55
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idk I like having some purpose in life and not just faffing around all day
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Sep 24, 2021 16:58
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Anything I do is purposeful otherwise I wouldn't be doing it. Except fart in my sleep because I don't know I'm doing that, but everything else, filled with purpose. The stuff I am paid to do is generally the least worthwhile purpose though because it's just "because I need money to live" which is quite boring. Now building a perfect beaver society in videogames, that is basically self actualization.
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Sep 24, 2021 17:03
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multijoe posted:idk I like having some purpose in life and not just faffing around all day Most jobs don't let you do either of these things
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Sep 24, 2021 17:06
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Jakabite posted:Never feel guilty for shirking your work as long as it doesn’t affect your fellow workers. Being paid to do what you like is a revolutionary act, comrade. As a certain captain once said: take what you can, give nothing back. Yea I know it and constantly say it to everyone else but I got an overactive guilt gland and a pathological need to be conscientious in all things (except abusing booze and drugs lol) both personal aspects that I suppose could be real assets in an occupation not based around making blood-sucking parasites wealthy, but those are fictional.
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Sep 24, 2021 17:08
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The idea that there is some better grade of purpose that you can accomplish by doing specific things is, IMO, a scam by people trying to sell you poo poo to fill the void put in your life by a sense of self doubt. Every action your human mind undertakes is infused with the utmost purpose and meaning that anything on the planet is capable of having. There is nothing better you could be doing in that instant because you have decided to do whatever it is you are doing and thus it is the correct thing to be doing, ordained by your meat brain which is the absolute authority on meaning on this godless rock.
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Sep 24, 2021 17:11
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Jakabite posted:The best job I ever had was as a census checker for the ONS. After the census, random postcodes are selected to basically have someone go round and do it again, to see how accurate the original was. I was paid for 37.5 hours per week, entirely unmonitored, and my job was dependent on people answering the door. Oh and started from the minute I left home to the minute I got back. Fancy a lie in? Yeah poo poo, no one answered the door, what’s to be done? Had a job like that at uni. They wanted to see what the actual use-level of the uni rooms were every hour, so I had to go and check whole departments to see what seminar rooms were in use or not. I just used the university timetable to see what rooms had stuff scheduled in them, and checked the computer rooms (the only ones with people in) every few hours.
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Sep 24, 2021 17:12
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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m5QpvT8N1TQ
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Sep 24, 2021 17:14
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There will be adequate petrol
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Sep 24, 2021 17:19
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Adequate petrol, just not in a petrol station.
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Sep 24, 2021 17:21
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OwlFancier posted:Anything I do is purposeful otherwise I wouldn't be doing it. Consider playing Suikoden 5.
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Sep 24, 2021 17:27
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Barry Foster posted:Yea I know it and constantly say it to everyone else but I got an overactive guilt gland and a pathological need to be conscientious in all things (except abusing booze and drugs lol) I’d recommend combining the three. I had strong reticence about it at first from the same reactive guilt gland but then I started having a couple of pints and half a spliff at lunch time and that all melted away.
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Sep 24, 2021 17:28
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Has anyone considered that the helicopters are in fact delivering petrol to IDS' home. Just picking it up from a couple of different cordoned-off petrol stations and leaving it for IDS and his gasoline-fuelled Peasant Misery Machine?
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Sep 24, 2021 17:31
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kingturnip posted:Has anyone considered that the helicopters are in fact delivering petrol to IDS' home. Just picking it up from a couple of different cordoned-off petrol stations and leaving it for IDS and his gasoline-fuelled Peasant Misery Machine? No no no, you got it wrong. The machine is POWERED BY peasants. The misery is just a delightful byproduct for IDS
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Sep 24, 2021 17:32
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OwlFancier posted:The idea that there is some better grade of purpose that you can accomplish by doing specific things is, IMO, a scam by people trying to sell you poo poo to fill the void put in your life by a sense of self doubt. Genuinely I cannot relate to this, being an unemployed failgamer made me miserable and even getting a low responsibility office job where I was getting out of the house and talking to other people was a huge boost in my life. I'm not saying your approach to life is wrong, but it's definitely not the only valid one there is
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Sep 24, 2021 17:33
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Gort posted:Most jobs don't let you do either of these things The end result is pretty much the same though, and the insights are pretty good. * Particularly the B&Q phone interview - it's very much ascribing malice to what was probably more likely some briefcase wanker having a brain genius moment and not considering the effects on the worker at all.
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Sep 24, 2021 17:37
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From what I understand it's only (currently) BP stations with a fuel shortage, the queues are all idiots panic buying? Pain for my wife because she needs to fill up ready to drive down to Enfield this evening.
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Sep 24, 2021 17:39
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jaete posted:that's what they want us to think innit. actually james bond gets good money The Moonraker book mentions that all the spies are paid in peanuts, but they're all landed gentry (e.g. Skyfall) so not to worry. Moneypenny and the rest of the typing pool are there to marry in.
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Sep 24, 2021 17:41
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Jakabite posted:I’d recommend combining the three. I had strong reticence about it at first from the same reactive guilt gland but then I started having a couple of pints and half a spliff at lunch time and that all melted away. I dunno how you can smoke weed during work hours and not get insanely paranoid about being found out. That would be a Bad Trip for me.
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Sep 24, 2021 17:43
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OwlFancier posted:There is nothing better you could be doing in that instant because you have decided to do whatever it is you are doing and thus it is the correct thing to be doing, ordained by your meat brain which is the absolute authority on meaning on this godless rock.
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Sep 24, 2021 17:45
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