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dr_rat posted:Fruit machines are not nearly as healthy as they sound Wait, slamming a fiver into one doesn’t get me my five-a-day? poo poo.
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Nov 3, 2021 12:58
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Nov 3, 2021 13:09
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Rasmus posted:That hair. It looks like a tornado just touched down. That was my first thought about the picture 
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Nov 3, 2021 14:08
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At first I thought it was pretty off-brand for this country to add superficial bells and flashing lights to a thing, but now I think about it what really gets added to UK-style fruit machines is unnecessary levels of complexity that don't add any actual depth, but allow you to convince yourself that you're more sophisticated when really you're just a more complicated kind of dumbass. So okay yes that tracks.
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Nov 3, 2021 14:20
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OwlFancier posted:Money goes in the top right, go button is usually on the bottom right, everything else is basically just there to make you think you aren't just putting money in a machine and watching it flash lights at you. The impression of meaningful complexity is the point, if you believe there is something to figure out, some trick to beating the machine, you will keep putting money into it, rather than submitting to the entropic inevitability of economics that dictates that you cannot win money on the machine if you play it for long enough. And the stupidest part is that it clearly states on the machines that the payout is 78% (or whatever the legal amount is these days) of what goes in. But people think that if they play long enough, they will hit the jackpot, ignoring the fact that 'playing long enough' statistically means putting in lots more than the jackpot. Growing up, fruit machines were known as 'the mugs' as it's a mugs game to play them.
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Nov 3, 2021 14:36
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This kid knows what's up. https://i.imgur.com/hD2az5c.mp4
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Nov 3, 2021 14:44
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spiny posted:And the stupidest part is that it clearly states on the machines that the payout is 78% (or whatever the legal amount is these days) of what goes in. But people think that if they play long enough, they will hit the jackpot, ignoring the fact that 'playing long enough' statistically means putting in lots more than the jackpot. Yeah, they have big signs in Denmark with "88% payout!" Tbh you could have the signs say "you will lose 12% of your money" and people would still do it
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Nov 3, 2021 15:03
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biracial bear for uncut posted:This kid knows what's up. Literally 
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Nov 3, 2021 15:04
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I used to hang out at a bar in German that had a clutch of old pensioners feeding those things and they were mostly aware from what I saw, from what I gathered they weren't that dumb that they didn't get it was rigged and they weren't going to win long term. It was basically just an attitude of "well, I have 20 euros now and all I'm going to do is buy beer with it, but maybe I'll get lucky and have 200 euros." There was one young guy I saw on them all the time who just straight up had a gambling addiction so I don't think logic played into that at all.
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Nov 3, 2021 15:07
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The trick is to watch which machine hasn't paid out in awhile and play those ones once the other idiot has left because it'll pay out Soon™
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Nov 3, 2021 15:25
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Cyrano4747 posted:I used to hang out at a bar in German that had a clutch of old pensioners feeding those things and they were mostly aware from what I saw, from what I gathered they weren't that dumb that they didn't get it was rigged and they weren't going to win long term. It was basically just an attitude of "well, I have 20 euros now and all I'm going to do is buy beer with it, but maybe I'll get lucky and have 200 euros." They all had gambling addictions, some people just do a better job justifying it to themselves
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Nov 3, 2021 15:43
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Ak Gara posted:The trick is to watch which machine hasn't paid out in awhile and play those ones once the other idiot has left because it'll pay out Soon™ Unironically this - almost everyone I know that gambles
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Nov 3, 2021 15:43
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Nov 3, 2021 15:50
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You can lead a chant of "Let's go Brandon!" in a sports stadium and it won't set off the censors if the game is being broadcast. I blame the broadcaster that was doing that NASCAR interview when they downplayed the "gently caress Joe Biden!" chant as "no, they're saying 'Let's go Brandon!'" In short: 
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Nov 3, 2021 16:06
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Baron von Eevl posted:@shittynewyorkercaptions is a solid follow. They all seem very long-winded. Speaking of wind, I found this one I'm not sure is connected to that account: 
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Nov 3, 2021 16:06
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They definitely posted that one a while back. This one's a favorite of mine and favors brevity.
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Nov 3, 2021 16:21
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Cream of Wheat hosed the wife, Bread just watched and played sax.
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Nov 3, 2021 16:21
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Cyrano4747 posted:I used to hang out at a bar in German that had a clutch of old pensioners feeding those things and they were mostly aware from what I saw, from what I gathered they weren't that dumb that they didn't get it was rigged and they weren't going to win long term. It was basically just an attitude of "well, I have 20 euros now and all I'm going to do is buy beer with it, but maybe I'll get lucky and have 200 euros." I used to drink at a tiny little bar in Huntsville, AL. All regulars, all the time. This one dude would play the video poker machine for every minute he was there. You could have a conversation with him, he'd be playing it. Throw some darts? He'd be back at the machine between throws. Same with pool. Video poker is (or was?) Illegal at the time. I forget the specifics, but you'd win phone cards that were then donated to charity. This gave you a discount on drinks. So, pretty much 0% payout. The guy got that. Some corporate lawyer with money to burn. Better to waste a few hundred a night than try the closest casino, where he'd lose far more. Dude was honest, so honest about his addiction that sometimes they'd lock him inside overnight. He'd play his game, write down the beers he bought, pay the morning shift, and take care of the night shift tip when he inevitably went back every evening. This was great if you wanted to stay after hours as a restaurant worker. "Whatever, guys. Just leave the money with T___, and have him let you out."
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Nov 3, 2021 16:24
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Cartoon Man posted:Less forbidden meme chat What is that man doing to his schooner
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Nov 3, 2021 17:41
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Full screen that and really take the time to get it in focus if you can. It goes so deep, you really feel like you could lose your arm up to the elbow
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Nov 3, 2021 17:44
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burexas.irom posted:What is that man doing to his schooner It's a sailboat
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Nov 3, 2021 17:45
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Why are they calling bejeweled machines fruit machines
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Nov 3, 2021 18:50
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All y'all with your outdated analog fruit machines, get with the times, upgrade to digital  Also you haven't seen a gambling machine until you see a pachinko parlor. https://youtu.be/iADzWQj4Qz0 Turn up the volume to full and your screen to full brightness to get the true experience of walking past these places at night.
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Nov 3, 2021 18:52
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Scaramouche posted:Why are they calling bejeweled machines fruit machines Probably some level of homophobia involved
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Nov 3, 2021 18:54
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Picnic Princess posted:All y'all with your outdated analog fruit machines, get with the times, upgrade to digital At least with poker machines there is the illusion of skill. Complete illusion, but it's there.
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Nov 3, 2021 19:32
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Scaramouche posted:Why are they calling bejeweled machines fruit machines Think that vague type of machine have been called fruit machines way longer than bejeweled has been a thing.
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Nov 3, 2021 19:38
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Scaramouche posted:Why are they calling bejeweled machines fruit machines Because the earliest ones were reels of cherries, oranges, bananas and the like. You know, 'Match the cherries, win a prize!' The name just sort of stuck.
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Nov 3, 2021 19:41
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Picnic Princess posted:All y'all with your outdated analog fruit machines, get with the times, upgrade to digital Y'all with your outdated digital fruit machines, get with the times, upgrade to SPICE 
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Nov 3, 2021 19:41
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minato posted:Y'all with your outdated digital fruit machines, get with the times, upgrade to SPICE June?
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Nov 3, 2021 19:42
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organburner posted:June?
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Nov 3, 2021 19:45
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organburner posted:June? JNCO grand prize is some sweet pants.
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Nov 3, 2021 19:46
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Cocaine Bear posted:JNCO The JNCO stillpants, with plenty of space to recycle your moisture.
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Nov 3, 2021 20:11
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My grandmother also used to say she didn't have a gambling problem which is why she gambled regularly and died many thousands in debt to many different loan shark companies.
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Nov 3, 2021 20:18
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That's kinda how I wanna go out. Take out a massive loan, host big parties with an open bar, then "lol try and collect from the dead, bitch!"
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Nov 3, 2021 21:01
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Ak Gara posted:That's kinda how I wanna go out. Take out a massive loan, host big parties with an open bar, then "lol try and collect from the dead, bitch!" I hope you have no children or family then.
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Nov 3, 2021 21:03
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dialhforhero posted:I hope you have no children or family then. In what world are children responsible for your debt?
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Nov 3, 2021 21:08
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Flash Gordon Ramsay posted:In what world are children responsible for your debt? This new one they invented in 1776
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Nov 3, 2021 21:09
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No. 1 ANIME HATER posted:This new one they invented in 1776 Not sure what you're getting at. In America if a parent dies, the kid isn't responsible for their debt. It can come out of their estate, and the kid may inherit less than they would have, but the kid doesn't take on the debt.
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Nov 3, 2021 21:13
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Meh, nvm
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Nov 3, 2021 21:20
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Flash Gordon Ramsay posted:Not sure what you're getting at. In America if a parent dies, the kid isn't responsible for their debt. It can come out of their estate, and the kid may inherit less than they would have, but the kid doesn't take on the debt. No but they can go after your estate, including your house and your kids won't get poo poo in inheritance. On the other hand, inheritance is immoral so gently caress it.
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Nov 3, 2021 21:24
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