quote:

Obligatory on my phone so please excuse any formatting errors.

Some backstory is needed, so here goes:

My bother 'Mike' was an excellent chess player. When I say 'was', I mean he was forced to give it up by my Dad. My Mother just silently supported my Dad, like most SAHM's of her era.

My parents had us way late in life. Mike was born when my parents were both 35, and I was an 'accident' when they were 43 years old. They are both 65 now, and are enjoying retirement. Mike loved chess and began playing it a lot. He was soon crushing older players, and the guys at the local chess club literally thought he was Chess Grand Master material provided he got the right training and exposure. They encouraged him to play in tournaments as much as he could, even in the U.S. Open Chess Championship which was held annually.

Dad wanted Mike to be a pro baseball player instead. He lost a ton of weight so he could play with Mike, got him the best coaches, and even flew him to Boston to watch the Sox. And he made sure he reminded Mike of it. Mike, meanwhile, won a bunch of trophies playing chess and hid all of them in my room so that our Dad would not know that they existed.

Dad eventually threw out his chessboard and prized antique chess set too. From now it was baseball all the way - but Mike sucked at it. Years of training, plenty of money down the drain, many meet-ups with retired players later, Dad finally realised that his dream was not to be. He finally gave up, and Mike was relieved.

A fraction of the money that was spent towards baseball would have definitely pushed my brother to the top tier of chess.

I asked my Mother years later if they ever thought of getting me special training in Swimming or Lacrosse - 2 sports in which I was good at in School - and she replied 'Your father thought that Sports were only for men' and that was that.

Mike is now a lawyer and is happily married with twin sons aged 4. My mother called last night and said that Mike had called them an hour earlier. He had binge-watched The Queen's Gambit and all those memories came flooding back. He picked up the phone and tore into my Dad, told him he was not their son anymore, and that they would never be able to see the twins again. He said that this was payback for all those years when he was forced to do something he was not interested in. Dad broke down soon after they hung up, and my mother was very upset. She called him back but he had already blocked their numbers. She then called me and told me what happened.

I called Mike up and he did not answer. I then hung up, and texted him saying he should not have said those things to Dad, and that he should call them back and apologise. Mike replied stating that he was blocking my number too. I replied, called him a vindictive person and that he shouldn't deprive our parents of their grandchildren's company and affection over something that took place years ago. AITA?

Hellblazer187 posted:

I don't know what a tooth bridge is but why would anyone try to pull one out of someone's mouth? This guy is just a walking red flag. Get out asap.

Soylent Pudding posted:

AITA for thinking my (F22) brother (M30) reacted a bit too rashly for something that took place years ago?

quote:

My Mother just silently supported my Dad, like most SAHM's of her era.

Soylent Pudding posted:

AITA for thinking my (F22) brother (M30) reacted a bit too rashly for something that took place years ago?

LadyPictureShow posted:

Uncle ShortyB posted:

Also for stupid cat chat my fiancee's cat is incapable of cleaning herself properly and instead "grooms" by absolutely soaking herself in her own spit to the point where we've both said "Link why are you soaking wet" on more than occasion within recent memory. She also can't figure out doors consistently and likes to get behind the door in an attempt to leave a room.

Chef Boyardeez Nuts posted:

I think I had a stroke

AITA for wanting a grocery store employee fired because I feel uncomfortable?

Chef Boyardeez Nuts posted:

AITA for being upset over a hypothetical scenario

LadyPictureShow posted:

haveblue posted:

Don't worry, he'll probably come back as a clone or a robot or an alternate universe copy or something

Beachcomber posted:

I love 'How do you always catch me?'

Neito posted:

If he came back as a clone, the whole thing would last far too long, involve virtual reality for some reason, and only exist in modern memory by getting mocked every October by Linkara.

CharlestheHammer posted:

Please comic book writers love referencing the clone saga

Hell Ben Reilly(from said saga) is the current spider-man right now

Neito posted:

I haven't really read much spider-man after I got really mad at One More Day, beyond a bit with the latest Secret Wars a couple years back. Does Not Satan still own his marriage?

Quackles posted:

Didn't everyone get mad at One More Day?

CharlestheHammer posted:

Yeah OMD is probably the most hated storyline. Which sucks as JMS run was pretty good but he got hosed by editorial interference really hard

quote:

My wife Ali (34F) and I (25M) had an argument over take-out that I'm thinking I made worse than it had to be by not being sympathetic.

I work 5 days a week, 6am to 5pm, including travel time. Ali is a SAHM to our two daughters (5 and 3) and we split the chores on a 60-40 schedule, and cooking on a 4-3 (I take weekends and Fridays or Mondays). Last night was her night to cook, but she said she was exhausted and experiencing the monthly flow, so she wanted me to take over for the night.

I asked her what she wanted for dinner and she said she didn't know. So I started listing some of her favorites that I could easily make based off what we had in the house, but she shot each down with increasing impatience, then finally interrupted me and said that half the point of me taking over was so she didn't have to think about it. So, I made a quick pasta bake, which the girls like because I usually put in tomatoes and bell peppers. Ali asked me what was for dinner and when I told her she said "Oh sounds good" which I took to mean that she was on board.

Ali sat down to dinner with us and picked at it, which I assumed was due to an upset stomach or cramps, and when she went to lie down while I got the girls ready for bed, I was all the more sure of that. While I was getting them ready, though, the doorbell rang. Ali had ordered jalapeno poppers, mozzarella sticks and cheese fries from a local pizza place. Not wanting to get the girls riled up I let it go and continued with their night routine and only asked her about it after they were asleep.

She was baffled that I ever thought she was going to eat what I had made. She said I should have known because this was her go-to comfort meal during this time of the month, and it's telling I didn't even care to remember or accomodate that. I pointed out that I had tried to include her wants and desires but she hadn't given me anything to work with. Ali argued that she has, for 7 years now, and this isn't a good precedent for later down the line or for the girls. She took the fries she had ordered and put them in the fridge for me for when I "stop being a dick".

LanceHunter posted:

Marvel editorial basically hated that Peter Parker was married almost immediately after the marriage happened, and was trying to find a way out of it. But Mary Jane was such a popular character, and they could never pull the trigger on making either her or Peter do something that would legitimately end in divorce. (Also, I'm pretty sure that even editorial realized that the only thing worse than a married Peter Parker would be a divorced Peter Parker.)

LanceHunter posted:

Marvel editorial basically hated that Peter Parker was married almost immediately after the marriage happened, and was trying to find a way out of it. But Mary Jane was such a popular character, and they could never pull the trigger on making either her or Peter do something that would legitimately end in divorce. (Also, I'm pretty sure that even editorial realized that the only thing worse than a married Peter Parker would be a divorced Peter Parker.)

Beachcomber posted:

Now I want a very stupid cat. Like she just spends hours with her face pressed against a wall for no discernable reason.

Please provide actual Stupid Cat behaviors, thank you.

quote:

I'm going to try and keep this as straight to the point as possible. My boyfriend and I go back to our high school days, but we started dating around my final year of college. We were close in high school before college separated us a bit (he went away, I stayed local), but when he moved back, we slowly picked up and began to hang out again, and we hit it off pretty fast. He works in a firm, and I'm a clerk in an office. College was tough when my mom died of cancer in my sophomore year, but that's when he reached out and reminded me why he was my best friend. He flew out to see me and be there for the funeral and even took me out numerous times to get me out of the home. That was the toughest time of my life, but also the thing that really drew us back together. He supported my career and was very supportive too, always going out of his way to give suggestions for moving up too, not to mention the many impromptu gifts too

However, I've been struggling with someone he said recently during our 6th anniversary dinner where he admitted that the reason he asked me out was because I was a gymnast/dancer in high school, and he also had a smirk while explaining it despite my surprise honestly. He said that the funeral provided a chance to reach out, but when we were in high school, he would sometimes get off to gymnastics photos because of the outfits and how it was like "free porn", and he also joked that that's the "only reason guys want to watch", and it honestly hurt my feelings. When I asked him why he was telling me this, he said it was because he had a few kinks in mind, but that he couldn't bring himself to ever ask and didn't know if I had lost my flexibility either, and I honestly felt kinda degraded in the moment when he said that it "didn't live up to what he thought" in the beginning

However, the main reason why I've been bothered about it, is because we have a daughter (6) who's currently in dance and gymnastics, and after what he said, I've just felt uncomfortable since he advocated for it too. I questioned if I was overreacting, but the more I thought about it, I just kept feeling worse. Like, what if he still gets off to that? If that's how he views the sport as a whole (besides maybe having an ulterior motive to like me the entire time), I don't feel comfortable with him taking her there and watching, and I keep telling myself that I'm overreacting, but I also think that I'm just trying to wish my fears away. That's why I'm writing this because I honestly feel scared and this was so out of character for him. He's never suggested kinks before I should add, and he's always been encouraging and respectful to me too. Sure, he makes jokes, but this one made me uncomfortable, and my dad hasn't been close to me since my mom passed too. I just feel scared and lonely in my thoughts, and I just need some advice on what to do or if I'm just not thinking clearly

Edit: When I talked to him and tried to explain how it made me feel, he reminded me of a past conversation where we talked about porn, and he reminded me of how I said I was fine with porn use, thus insinuating that gymnastics is porn by comparing it to that conversation

So, when I tried to elaborate on my feelings, he just threw that at me and said I was overreacting, and I think there's a huge difference between porn and taking a sport out of context and using it as such, to which he said that "getting off to gymnasts isn't as bad as porn because it's socially acceptable" when I tried to elaborate my feelings. When I asked him if he still gets off to gymnasts sometimes, he said that it "didn't matter if he did"

Because it is late and he is home, I am going to call a therapist for myself tomorrow and also my dad about going over to his place with my daughter, since it's only been a day or so since the dinner, and she hasn't/won't be going to any sports as long as we're still here, which hopefully, will be no longer than tomorrow

I just got scared and flustered when he yelled at me during our follow-up and not having almost anyone to talk to besides posting here because after mom passed, dad wasn't space and wouldn't respond to me for some time, but I think tomorrow and enough calls will have him help, and if not, a hotel as soon as tomorrow. I also had some depression after mom as you might've seen in other comments that prevented me from making friends after finally getting out of being bedridden, and that's not an excuse, but I just wanted to ask and post here before I left and ask for anything my rushing mind might overlook. Like, what if I leave and have no evidence of what he did besides my word against his if it comes to a custody battle, say if he deletes the stuff on his phone. But, as soon as tomorrow, I'll reach out to dad and get out

​

TL;DR: My husband told me that he only dated me because I used to do dance in high school which gave him ideas for specific kinks, but he also admitted that he used to get off to gymnastics photos because it was like "free porn" and how that's the only reason why men watch the sport, and it just made me feel degraded. However, my main concern, is that we have a daughter (6) who also does gymnastics/dance, and I've just felt uncomfortable after he told me this given his views on the sport

quote:

I tried talking to him again, and that's why I'm writing this. I talked to him two times before writing my first post, and I decided once more after it. We knew each other since high school but started dating in my last year of college. I went to school locally, and he went out of state, and it wasn't until my mom died of cancer in my sophomore year that we really reconnected again. He flew out to see me and took me out numerous times to get me out of the home when I was bedridden and losing weight, and he was there for the funeral too. He saw me cry a lot, and he also helped me become active again and eventually regain the weight I had lost, and we became so much closer afterward. He supported my career and always gave suggestions to help me move up, not to many many impromptu gifts and date nights as well

However, during our 6th-anniversary dinner, he admitted that the reason he reached out to me was not for my mother's funeral, but because I was a dancer/gymnast in high school and the funeral offered the "right opportunity". He also said that he sometimes gets off to photos of gymnasts and that he had a kink he was afraid to mention until now because he didn't know if I had lost my flexibility, but considering our anniversary, he figured that it was the perfect time to ask. However, when I asked why he viewed gymnastics that way, he said that it was basically "free porn" and that "the only reason men watch the sport is because of how normalized it is to watch them in leotards", and that made me feel a little degraded

When I tried to talk to him again after processing my thoughts, he was already disappointed that I wasn't in the mood to try his kinks after our anniversary dinner the day before, telling me that "you shouldn't be surprised that boys view it that way" because they're "basically running around in underwear while dancing". However, when I asked if he still gets off to it, he got defensive and said yes and "what does it matter?" I expressed how I felt uncomfortable not only with the dinner comments, but also how he advocated putting our daughter (f6) in gymnastics given the fact that he views the sport as "free porn". In regards to him getting off to gymnastics photos, he said that I should be fine with it because I once said that I'm fine with porn, and while I did say that, he took it out of context. Porn is usually consenting whereas using gymnastics is taking it grossly out of context. Gymnastics is a sport, but he didn't agree. He said that getting off to gymnasts is "better than getting off to porn because they're wearing something", and when I told him that a lot of gymnasts often appear/are young, he said it "didn't matter" and to "mind my own business

Update:

A few people said that I overreacted in my first post and that I was accusing him of things wrongfully. So, I want to try and explain myself. I made my first post because I wasn't close to dad. Dad wanted space after mom passed, and there would be times when he wouldn't return my calls unless it was something urgent or every once in a while. He was depressed after she passed, and I didn't have many friends outside of my job because I cut myself off from a lot of people after she passed. My husband helped fill the void when he flew down, but I regret moving away from some friends. I was able to call my dad and text him beforehand that it was urgent, and we were able to talk about everything that happened. He was surprised to hear what my husband said, saying that he probably had an ulterior motive the entire time that was the hidden kink he only felt comfortable addressing on our anniversary. He strongly disagreed with his comments about gymnastics, saying that his defensiveness/degrading around the topic wasn't normal or a good thing, not to mention advocating for our daughter to do the sport that he considers porn and gets off to

He said that we could come over at any time, but when I wrote my last post, I said I was against going into his phone because I figured it would look controlling, but he and others said that it was fine given the circumstances. But, he's been rather protective of his phone since our conversation, and he also changed the password when he left it to charge and I tried to get in (he knew my password before I recently changed it). He also has a laptop that I tried to view on Saturday when he went out with some friends like he usually does, but I never knew that password and he wasn't gone that long. I also asked if he'd be willing to go to counseling together for the second time, but he said no and got upset like he's been ever since declining his kink where he wanted me to wear an old gymnastics uniform for role play. I have no issue with kinks or role-playing, but it hurt when he said that the funeral "meant nothing" when he was upset and that I "owed it to him" after how he was there for me. But, again, when I asked if he currently gets off to underaged gymnasts, he just smirked and said "what does it matter" and that I'm "being a hypocrite when I said I'm fine with porn", and he's also told his friends/parents that I'm withholding sex from him and being manipulative because I declined his kink. And when he told me that he wanted me to meet with his parents, I didn't want to, and he just yelled at me again (he rarely yells, but this hidden kink has showed a new side of him)

I'm currently at my dad's with my daughter, and we didn't tell him when we were leaving. I was also able to record some of his views on gymnastics and getting off stuff, but he got upset and called my job and told them that I left with our daughter and a bunch of lies, and it's all been really stressful lately. I'm afraid of losing my job and haven't been back at work (PTO) because I'm worried he'll show up there as we've been gone for a few days. However, and this is unrelated... we have a neutral friend whose son (m15) recently came out to her as bi, and she came over a few weeks ago to talk about how to bring it up to her husband when her son was afraid to tell him. And while that has nothing to do with this situation, my husband was home when she came over and was supportive, but now is threatening to out him to the dad (who he's close with, thus why I didn't reach out to the wife for advice) if I don't come back, and I don't know if she told the husband yet. I'm considering calling her to give her a heads up, but the last time we talked, she hadn't told him yet because he can be abusive, thus why the son came out to her. I'm already stressed with my job and explaining everything to my daughter while dad helps with a lawyer and now that extra piece, and I just need advice on what to do. Not only for myself, but now also this friend who he's bought into the equation to try and get us to come back

​

TL;DR: I talked to my husband again and am currently at my dad's with my daughter, but my husband is threatening to out a friend of ours whose son (m15) recently came out to his mom, but was afraid to come out to his dad who has been abusive, and he's using that to try and get us to come back home

spouse posted:

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

CW: psychopath pedophile gymnast kink dad who may (will) attempt to groom his daughter


Husband(m29) said he only dated me because I(f28) was a dancer in high school, but "didn't live up to expectations" that he had. He also advocated to put our daughter in dance, and I don't feel comfortable anymore



(Update) Husband(m29) said he only dated me because I(f28) was a dancer in high school, but "didn't live up to expectations" that he had. He also advocated to put our daughter in dance, and I don't feel comfortable anymore

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xBbGmkMGyok&t=5s

spouse posted:

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

CW: psychopath pedophile gymnast kink dad who may (will) attempt to groom his daughter


Husband(m29) said he only dated me because I(f28) was a dancer in high school, but "didn't live up to expectations" that he had. He also advocated to put our daughter in dance, and I don't feel comfortable anymore



(Update) Husband(m29) said he only dated me because I(f28) was a dancer in high school, but "didn't live up to expectations" that he had. He also advocated to put our daughter in dance, and I don't feel comfortable anymore

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xBbGmkMGyok&t=5s

quote:

But, again, when I asked if he currently gets off to underaged gymnasts, he just smirked and said "what does it matter" and that I'm "being a hypocrite when I said I'm fine with porn",

quote:

We both are each other's firsts, been dating for more than a year. Both of us are pretty inexperienced, as I can't cum with her either, apart from sex. I've noticed her being less and less interested in having sex, and when I talked about it with her, she angrily said that in so much time everything should have worked out. So what should I do?

quote:

Close the thread, we broke up

The Glumslinger posted:

My gf doesn't want to have sex because I can't make her cum

OP 3 hours later in the comments

LanceHunter posted:

Marvel editorial basically hated that Peter Parker was married almost immediately after the marriage happened, and was trying to find a way out of it. But Mary Jane was such a popular character, and they could never pull the trigger on making either her or Peter do something that would legitimately end in divorce. (Also, I'm pretty sure that even editorial realized that the only thing worse than a married Peter Parker would be a divorced Peter Parker.)

Mx. posted:

it's ok to kill paedophiles

sullat posted:

Divorced Peter Parker was awesome tho?

CharlestheHammer posted:

I don’t think Peter has ever been divorced.

He was seperate for a short time in the late 90s but no one liked that run