r/relationships: I have nothing against this baby.

The Something Awful Forums > Main > General Bullshit > r/relationships: I have nothing against this baby.

limp_cheese: Sep 10, 2007; Nothing to see here. Move along.

olylifter posted:

this is absolutely a thing. my dad proposed to my mom in the midst of an argument in the stairwell of their apartment building by taking the engagement ring out of his pocket, tossing it at her and saying "here, gently caress" and walking off

as long as I've been around they've been bickering with each other incessantly, I'm convinced at least part of the reason they've stuck with each other is neither wants them to let the other win the argument they've been having for the best part of 50 years.

yet they're utterly devoted to one another - when my mom had a heart valve replaced a couple years back my dad pretty much lived in her hospital room until she was released. aside from nights the only time he wasn't there is when I was.

This post reminds me of another post that explains real love. Something about how the husband has had to replace the thermometer a few times a year for 30 years and she refuses to listen. I think the last line is something like "So I repair the thermostat again, knowing full well she will break it AGAIN, because I genuinely don't want her to be cold." Anyone have that handy?

# ? Nov 23, 2021 01:54

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# ? May 30, 2024 14:46

cumpantry: Dec 18, 2020

AITA for not wanting my daughter to be too feminine at my house??

quote:

This sounds weird but let me explain it. My (44M) wife (41F) and I divorced last year and I have been living in my own for the first time in my life. I lived with my mother until I was 25; then with my girlfriend that later became my wife and the mother of my daughter (18F).

I have been happy about living without women for the first time and never felt more free. My job is from home and I can use my free time to play video games. I had a couple of sexual encounters since the divorce but I always take them to hotels because I don't want women at my house.

My daughter stays with me on weekends and that is fine because I don't see her as a sexually charged female figure that would try to control me but recently she has been going out more to parties and stuff like that so she uses makeup and sexier clothes. I don't like that because it is important for me to not have female energy in my place. When I talk with her about it, she didn't understand what I was talking about.

I want to insist on this issue because it is serious to me. Am I the rear end in a top hat?

# ? Nov 23, 2021 01:57

Midnight Voyager: Jul 2, 2008; Lipstick Apathy

cumpantry posted:

AITA for not wanting my daughter to be too feminine at my house??

This is more of an "Am I Bugfuck Insane?" question, but I guess AITA is all we have

# ? Nov 23, 2021 02:01

The Lone Badger: Sep 24, 2007

quote:

. My (44M) wife (41F) and I divorced last year

quote:

a sexually charged female figure that would try to control me

Dude needs therapy.

# ? Nov 23, 2021 02:07

The Maroon Hawk: May 10, 2008

F e m a l e
E n e r g y

# ? Nov 23, 2021 02:12

MarcusSA: Sep 23, 2007

cumshitter posted:

AITA for visiting my brother in prison?

Lies! All lies!!

# ? Nov 23, 2021 02:17

mind the walrus: Sep 22, 2006

cumpantry posted:

AITA for not wanting my daughter to be too feminine at my house??

This dude 100% talks to his penis while he "meditates."

# ? Nov 23, 2021 02:18

Mx.: Dec 16, 2006; I'm a great fan! When I watch TV I'm always saying "That's political correctness gone mad!"
Why thankyew!

cumpantry posted:

AITA for not wanting my daughter to be too feminine at my house??

what the gently caress

e: where did you find this one?

Mx. fucked around with this message at 02:25 on Nov 23, 2021

# ? Nov 23, 2021 02:23

haveblue: Aug 15, 2005; Toilet Rascal

cumpantry posted:

AITA for not wanting my daughter to be too feminine at my house??

# ? Nov 23, 2021 02:25

spacetoaster: Feb 10, 2014

Tobermory posted:

I dunno. The redditor comments are bizarre. It's this weird mix of "Naturally you feel upset", "You don't get any say in who your parents let into your house", "but faaaaaaaamily", and arguments about .

Yeah, but if he was going to wait in the van, why come up to the door and knock?

# ? Nov 23, 2021 02:26

MarcusSA: Sep 23, 2007

spacetoaster posted:

Yeah, but if he was going to wait in the van, why come up to the door and knock?

Maybe as to not freak out the neurotic 18 year old living there when she saw someone sitting in the van?

# ? Nov 23, 2021 02:31

cumpantry: Dec 18, 2020

Mx. posted:

e: where did you find this one?

browsed amitheasshole sorted by newest at the right time cause it looks like it's deleted now

# ? Nov 23, 2021 02:34

Midnight Voyager: Jul 2, 2008; Lipstick Apathy

cumpantry posted:

browsed amitheasshole sorted by newest at the right time cause it looks like it's deleted now

I guess he didn't like the resounding reply of "Get immediate therapy for your enormous issue with women."

# ? Nov 23, 2021 02:36

Chloe Jessica: Nov 6, 2021; Pick 2.0

Midnight Voyager posted:

I guess he didn't like the resounding reply of "Get immediate therapy for your enormous issue with women."

nah, it was removed by the mods for not being interpersonal conflict... apparently they have a rule against thought arguments

# ? Nov 23, 2021 02:39

Nooner: Mar 26, 2011; AN A+ OPSTER (:

cumpantry posted:

AITA for not wanting my daughter to be too feminine at my house??

# ? Nov 23, 2021 02:40

The Lone Badger: Sep 24, 2007

Midnight Voyager posted:

I guess he didn't like the resounding reply of "Get immediate therapy for your enormous issue with women."

Note that this is not exactly the same as "yta". Dude obviously has some major issues and/or trauma from his previous marriage that he needs to work through, and a therapist can very much help him process it properly.

# ? Nov 23, 2021 02:45

datajugend: Jan 15, 2010; Cat Army

spacetoaster posted:

Yeah, but if he was going to wait in the van, why come up to the door and knock?

To say hello?

# ? Nov 23, 2021 02:48

the holy poopacy: May 16, 2009; hey! check this out; Fun Shoe

dude do you know how much female energy the average therapist's office has? no thanks

# ? Nov 23, 2021 03:00

PancakeTransmission: May 27, 2007; You gotta improvise, Lisa: cloves, Tom Collins mix, frozen pie crust...; Plaster Town Cop

trickybiscuits posted:

DRS SAID I WAS SICK AND COULD DIE FROM A BROKEN HEART

# ? Nov 23, 2021 03:03

the holy poopacy: May 16, 2009; hey! check this out; Fun Shoe

I (M33) went on a date with my gf (F31) to makeup for transgressions of the previous weekend. Things didn't go well and I'm not sure if it's appropriate for me to think she was being somewhat unreasonable.

quote:

PREFACE: I hosed up royally last weekend by showing up to her step-dad and mom's house and trying to do a concrete pad. I ended up getting excessively drunk and I couldn't complete the job. I am and was extensively embarassed and I feel like it's the worst thing I've ever done. I regret it more than anything but I also can't change it so all I can do is try and be better. This date was supposed to be a sort of "i'm sorry" but I also because I haven't been giving her enough and she deserves some attention. She had asked me beforehand to take her on a date to start to makeup for it. I had bought her flowers the previous day as an attempt at the beginning of an apology. All that follows is to the "best of my knowledge" and may not be exactly accurate. This IS NOT my attempt at "being right", I'm just trying to relay my perception of the events for whoever reads this. I take full responsibility for the BS that happened last weekend and I said as much to her beforehand.

She sent me a message before I got off work saying that she really needed a margherita because her work had been stressful. I got off work and drove home, arriving as she was showering. I waited for her to finish then took my own shower. I asked her to help me get dressed because I believe she has a better taste in clothes than I do. I stretched out a shirt because I put it on backwards and had to switch it out with another one. She suggested I wear a pair of black pants. I got dressed, she did her make-up, we left.

I directd us to the resturant because I knew the way already and I thought it'd make her life easier if she didn't have to type it into her phone to figure it out and she likes when the man "take's charge" a little. When we arrived we found parking and the walked up the ramp to talk to the hostess. She asked to be seated in the patio area because it was outdoors. we asked and went down to the bar to get some early drinks for while we waited. We got a marherita each and a shot of tequila. We downed our shots and walked back up to the waiting area with our drinks.

We found a place on the ramp to wait for the hostess to call us. She finished her drink while we chatted a little, I offered her some of mine since I hadn't drunk any of it yet. She took a sip and then a few moments later I took a sip as well. Everything seemed to be going alright. The hostess came out and found us and then seated us in the patio. We got to our table and then proceeded to look for the happy hour menu (why we came to this place in the first place). A waitress came and clarified to us that we had to be seated in the bar for the happy hour menu to be in effect. The waitress left and I asked her if she wanted me to go ask the hostess is we could move to the bar so we could get the happy hour menu (man taking charge thing again). I said I was going to go see if there was any tables available in the bar still and she let me know that I should ask the hostess if we could move over. I made the mistake of thinking she wanted me to ask the hostess if we could move if I saw an open table so, after inspecting the bar and realizing there wasn't any tables open, I returned without talking to the hostess and told her nothing was open.

She asked me if I had asked the hostess, I believe I said "No, because there wasn't any tables". Then, while I was saying that, I looked in the direction of the bar and realized that maybe the lower-level tent was also bar seating, so I added "But maybe that tent is part of the bar. Sorry, I hadn't thought about that". She said "That's why I asked you to talk to the staff, I thought you might miss some of the seating" in a very negative tone. I apologized and got up and returned to the hostess counter. I told the hostess what had happened and she walked with me over to the outdoor bar seating, saw that there was a few tables, and told me that we could just pick a table and move.

I returned to our patio table where she was seated and told her that the hostess had said we could move. She asked me to clarify if the hostess had said we could just "move to any table" and I told her that "yes, we can". We picked up what remained of our drinks and moved down to the outdoor bar seating.

At this point she relayed to me (for a second time) that she was unhappy that I hadn't done what she had initially asked and "talked to the hostess". I responded that I had misinterpreted what she had asked of me, apologized, and asked her to please understand that I had just not understood what she had asked. She pressed further and continued to reiterate that I need to be more attentive. At this point I believe I apologized again and then we somehow seg-wayed into another conversation.

She asked me if I wanted any food besides nachos and since I was still looking at the menu and not really sure if I wanted anything else either responded with "no" or nothing at all. She also relayed to me that she wanted to get 4 shots of tequila for the both of us and 2 margaritas on-the-rocks with no salt and 1 side of mango puree. She asked me to relay back to her our order to check for accuracy and I managed to do it to about 90% accuracy. Then I believe here we did some small chit-chat and I was just trying to be somewhat funny and playful. I slouched in my chair and joked that I was "slouching because I'm lazy". Shee mentioned that I should sit up so I'm not shorter than her and I glazed over it not thinking that she was really bothered by it.

Somewhere in here our waitresses showed up and asked us to order. I ordered the food and drinks that Jess had requested (I believe flawlessly, and also because she gave me a look of "you're the man, you order for us") but I made a split-second decision to add on some tacos because I was thinking in that moment that maybe nachos weren't enough and I hadn't thought enough about it while we had been talking. The waitresses walked away and Jess informed me that she was disappointed that I hadn't talked with her first about me ordering something else besides nachos because she "might have wanted something that we could share". She only likes certain things and won't eat any meat besides white meat. Only 1 of the 3 tacos was white meat. She said I "should be thinking about us more as a couple and be concerned about what she wants as well" and I needed to "stop living and thinking like a bachelor". "Valid Points", I thought. I need to be more attentive regardless. I believe at this point I apologized and agreed with her without arguing.

Somewhere along after this point we began to get in an argument. I believe it began with her being frustrated that I hadn't properly acknowledged how much she hated me slouching because it made her feel tall and "you should know how much I hate feeling taller than everyone". I believe I initially started with an apology but that didn't seem to satiate her dissatisfaction with my actions so she kept pressing. I attempted to listen and apologized again but she kept pressing how much I had hosed up by "not already knowing she hates being seen as taller than me". At this point I grew incredibly frustrated but I attempted to keep my cool and I asked her to "please pick your battles. I've apologized and telling me again won't do anything. I've said I'm sorry but please can we just have a nice dinner". I don't believe she liked that comment because after that point it just slowly devolved into us not talking. Our food came, we finished it. I slowly worked myself into a mental-space where I was about ready to cry.

I was quiet for a good 10-20 minutes until we decided I should go to the bar and ask for the check. I did and the bartender told me he'd send someone out. I returned to my seat and waited silently for the check. she told me she was going to go get the car started and I silently waited for the check. They came, I paid, then i got up and returned to the car and we drove home in silence. When we got home we both got out and I bee-lined to the side-yard and broke down crying for 20 minutes.

I feel like I'm trying but I also am not going to sit there while someone belittles me for a solid 10 minutes for me forgetting to acknowledge they hate being seen as taller than me. Yeah, I get that it's an insecurity, but we've only been dating 3 months, I don't have her memorized and I feel like my actions are being seen as malicious when I made and honest mistake AND apologized. Even after that the negative comments and talk about how I'm ruining the date because I asked her to basically calm down. I have never fought with someone this much ever and I don't know what to do.

I just feel like her complaints about how I acted were completely unfounded. I definitely need to make-up for the problems I created the previous weekend, but 1) not realizing how much she hates being seen as taller than everyone by me slouching, 2) getting very argumentative that I didn't ask the hostess the first time she asked me to go find us a new table (after I clarified AND apologized for not realizing what she had wanted), and 3) ordering a little extra food without consulting her first, just seems a little bit nit-picky. I was there, present, and attempting to do the things that I know she normally likes in a partner but it wasn't good enough. PLEASE tell me I'm wrong if I am. Please ask me to clarify if you need some clarification.

tl;dr: Took girlfriend on a date to apologize for my transgressions, thought I was being pretty reasonable, she thought I was being inconsiderate and needed to try harder. Not sure what I should do.

# ? Nov 23, 2021 03:31

PancakeTransmission: May 27, 2007; You gotta improvise, Lisa: cloves, Tom Collins mix, frozen pie crust...; Plaster Town Cop

the holy poopacy posted:

I (M33) went on a date with my gf (F31) to makeup for transgressions of the previous weekend. Things didn't go well and I'm not sure if it's appropriate for me to think she was being somewhat unreasonable.

What the gently caress ~~was your question??~~

# ? Nov 23, 2021 03:51

Cowslips Warren: Oct 29, 2005; What use had they for tricks and cunning, living in the enemy's warren and paying his price?; Grimey Drawer

mind the walrus posted:

This dude 100% talks to his penis while he "meditates."

poo poo no wonder my meditation goes nowhere, I haven't been talking to my clit.

or does it have to be a penis? Would a dildo work in a pinch?

AITA for telling my wife to grow up in front of our son?

quote:

I�ll make this brief.

My wife (33F) and I (33M) have been together for 13 years, and married for 12. I love her dearly. She�s intelligent, gorgeous, agreeable, and, above all, a wonderful mother to our firstborn (5M). Our relationship was�hostile soon after our marriage due to our fertility issues. Eventually, however, we reconciled once we were blessed with news of our son, and since then our relationship has been uneventful.

As a STAHM, she cares for our son when he�s home from pre-school. I play an active role in our son�s life as well: I take him on walks, read him to sleep, play with him, etc. However, due to my job I often get home late, meaning she is with him more often than I am. This is relevant.

Now, the issue: my wife�s phobia of stink bugs. Every time she spots or hears one she squeals like a child, and it drives me up the wall. It�s so bad that she once found one crawling on her in our bed, and refused to sleep in our room for the next week. I offered to find her a therapist, but she�s refused.

This wouldn�t be much of an issue were it not for its impact on our son. He's begun to take after his mother. Now, whenever he sees one, he starts wailing like her, and is unconsolable for hours. It hurts seeing him that distraught; I don�t mind his tears, but knowing he�s hurting pains me�so much so that I�ve begun to resent my wife.

Yesterday was when I snapped. I was napping next to my son on the couch when I was jolted awake by glass shattering and my wife squealing. Worried that she was hurt, I raced into the kitchen, where I found her cowering in the corner, sobbing uncontrollably. When I asked her what had happened, she pointed to glass shards on the floor, where she told me she had dropped a plate on a stink bug.

At that moment, my son began crying. I saw red and barked at my wife, �This is the example you set for [son's name]?! Grow up!� To be honest, I had a few other choice words�none of which I remember�before storming off.

I tried apologizing to her last night, but she wouldn�t even look at me. She sent me a text this morning berating me for exploding in front of our son, an incident she claims constitutes verbal abuse.

AITA?

My brother, when a toddler, used to freak the gently caress out at seeing crickets. My dad's idea was to show him how one stomps on a bug, screaming DEAD MEAT. This proved very effective, and many years of DEAD MEAT ensued. My dad and brother, of course, left the smashed bugs for others to clean up.

Now I do not think that would work with a stinkbug, but this level of phobia needs loving therapy.

# ? Nov 23, 2021 03:56

Nooner: Mar 26, 2011; AN A+ OPSTER (:

the holy poopacy posted:

I (M33) went on a date with my gf (F31) to makeup for transgressions of the previous weekend. Things didn't go well and I'm not sure if it's appropriate for me to think she was being somewhat unreasonable.

This dude rules

"Sorry i got hammered and hosed up your parents driveway. Let me take you to a bar and drink until i cry to make up for it"

# ? Nov 23, 2021 04:03

Guildenstern Mother: Mar 31, 2010; Why walk when you can ride?

Cowslips Warren posted:

poo poo no wonder my meditation goes nowhere, I haven't been talking to my clit.

or does it have to be a penis? Would a dildo work in a pinch?

Now I'm just imagining a Buddhist temple with rows of nuns quietly meditating, large tastefully carved dildos sticking up from between their legs.

# ? Nov 23, 2021 04:10

limp_cheese: Sep 10, 2007; Nothing to see here. Move along.

the holy poopacy posted:

I (M33) went on a date with my gf (F31) to makeup for transgressions of the previous weekend. Things didn't go well and I'm not sure if it's appropriate for me to think she was being somewhat unreasonable.

I hosed up royally last weekend by showing up to her step-dad and mom's house and trying to do a concrete pad. I ended up getting excessively drunk and I couldn't complete the job.

This should have been the story instead of the wall of text I didn't read.

# ? Nov 23, 2021 04:45

EIDE Van Hagar: Dec 8, 2000; Beep Boop

AITA for sniffing a seat?

quote:

I have always had the urge to sniff seats after people have sat on them. I don't know why I am this way, but I've always been like this and nobody has had a huge problem with it until recently. It isn't sexual, it just makes me extremely happy and I have no other explanation for it. I've done it since I was a child and I continue to do it to this day. I often smell nothing, but sometimes I get wonderful pungent smells. I sniff bus seats when nobody is looking, train seats, taxi seats of the previous rider, and I wait until my lecture hall is mostly empty to begin sniffing. I spend my time mentally mapping out the most desirable seats beforehand, which is causing me to fall behind the class. I get some revolted expressions, but I've never been confronted. Family and close friends have recommended that I seek therapy, but the embarrassment is too much. The thought of the therapist standing up the whole time so I don't "inhale their booty fumes" (as my brother says) afterwards is crippling.

The other day I was in the waiting room of my orthodontics office to have my overbite checked out. There was an older gentlemen in the seat next to me who was quite gassy. I could barely keep my leg still, I was very excited. I took my moment. I laughed and said "the restroom is right there man" while pointing to the restroom in the corner. He laughed and went. I scanned the room and everyone was looking at their phones. I got on my knees and sniffed that man's seat with everything I had in me, and I was very pleased. In the middle of my sniff I heard "What the hell man" from behind me. Heads turned and people gasped. I lifted up my nose to the sight of a petrified girl. I felt like a monster. I was mortified. Someone started walking towards me but I got myself out of there and I don't think I'll ever have the guts to show my face in that orthodontist's again. I will have to start going to the one that's an hour away.

Upon reflection, I have my doubts I was the rear end in a top hat here. I am well within my rights to sniff a seat whether it had been sat on or not. Who could I possibly hurt by sniffing a seat? They never even know it happened. I think the waiting room overreacted and they were just trying to humiliate me. I would love to hear what you think, Reddit!

# ? Nov 23, 2021 04:56

packetmantis: Feb 26, 2013

What the gently caress???????????????

# ? Nov 23, 2021 04:57

Midnight Voyager: Jul 2, 2008; Lipstick Apathy

EIDE Van Hagar posted:

AITA for sniffing a seat?
I would love to hear what you think, Reddit!

I think you will change your thoughts on this after you hear what Reddit thinks, man.

# ? Nov 23, 2021 04:59

The Lone Badger: Sep 24, 2007

quote:

I have always had the urge to sniff seats after people have sat on them. I don't know why I am this way

It is because you are a dog, OP.

# ? Nov 23, 2021 05:03

Flavahbeast: Jul 21, 2001

Midnight Voyager posted:

I think you will change your thoughts on this after you hear what Reddit thinks, man.

the thread is actually very supportive with about a dozen redditors sharing their own seat sniffing antics

# ? Nov 23, 2021 05:03

olylifter: Sep 13, 2007; I'm bad with money and you have an avatar!

Nooner posted:

This dude rules

"Sorry i got hammered and hosed up your parents driveway. Let me take you to a bar and drink until i cry to make up for it"

he's loving 33 acting like this. Jesus had followers and poo poo by this point and you're still loving up a concrete pad ya drunken halfwit, get your poo poo together.

# ? Nov 23, 2021 05:03

AmiYumi: Oct 10, 2005; I FORGOT TO HAIL KING TORG

cumshitter posted:

AITA for visiting my brother in prison?
He had it in his system because the day before the incident, after he got home from work, he took one for pain.

LOL, nope. Either he confessed and they faked the test, or (much more likely) he blitzed into an old lady holding a half-empty bottle of oxys he�d filled like 3 days ago.

# ? Nov 23, 2021 05:05

Midnight Voyager: Jul 2, 2008; Lipstick Apathy

Flavahbeast posted:

the thread is actually very supportive with about a dozen redditors sharing their own seat sniffing antics

well, my skin's crawling!

# ? Nov 23, 2021 05:06

ArbitraryC: Jan 28, 2009; Pick a number, any number; Pillbug

Nooner posted:

This dude rules

"Sorry i got hammered and hosed up your parents driveway. Let me take you to a bar and drink until i cry to make up for it"

I was sad there weren't more details about the pour. Unless it's an incredibly small project this 3 mo relationship had the gf asking for several hundred if not several grand of free labor, not even for her specifically but for her relatives, which is p funny.

# ? Nov 23, 2021 05:06

pentyne: Nov 7, 2012

AmiYumi posted:

LOL, nope. Either he confessed and they faked the test, or (much more likely) he blitzed into an old lady holding a half-empty bottle of oxys he�d filled like 3 days ago.

Even that seems extreme for 20 years. That's like, driving a stolen car on a suspended license, hoping the sidewalk and mowing someone down while blitzed out of your mind, then fleeing the scene after doing a burnout on the body.

# ? Nov 23, 2021 05:08

Cthulu Carl: Apr 16, 2006

# ? Nov 23, 2021 05:20

Megillah Gorilla: Sep 22, 2003; If only all of life's problems could be solved by smoking a professor of ancient evil texts.; Bread Liar

EIDE Van Hagar posted:

AITA for sniffing a seat?

quote:

Emotional Buswell admits to chair-sniffing incident

Western Australian Opposition Leader Troy Buswell has had to hold back tears while acknowledging more offensive behaviour towards a female colleague.

Yesterday Mr Buswell refused to be drawn on an allegation that he sniffed the chair of a female staffer in late 2005.

On 13 occasions he described the allegation as an unsubstantiated rumour.

Today however, he admitted the allegation was true.

"All I can confirm is that the events described in the paper by the former female staffer are accurate," he said.

In an emotionally charged media conference, Mr Buswell, who has only been leader for little more than three months, had to take a break when tears started welling in his eyes.

He conceded that his behaviour before becoming leader had sometimes been highly offensive but said he committed to changing.

Even though Liberal MPs are privately saying they are disgusted by the incident, they say there will not be a leadership change because there is no alternative to Mr Buswell as leader.

# ? Nov 23, 2021 05:27

Brawnfire: Jul 13, 2004; 🎧Listen to Cylindricule!🎵
https://linktr.ee/Cylindricule

Any officer caught sniffing the saddle of the exercise bicycle in the women's gym will be discharged without trial.

# ? Nov 23, 2021 05:28

HiroProtagonist: May 7, 2007

EIDE Van Hagar posted:

AITA for sniffing a seat?

And then everyone clapped, etc

# ? Nov 23, 2021 05:30

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# ? May 30, 2024 14:46

BIG FLUFFY DOG: Feb 16, 2011; On the internet, nobody knows you're a dog.

olylifter posted:

he's loving 33 acting like this. Jesus had followers and poo poo by this point and you're still loving up a concrete pad ya drunken halfwit, get your poo poo together.

at this point jesus was a homeless man about to get a criminal record.

# ? Nov 23, 2021 05:54

The Something Awful Forums > Main > General Bullshit > r/relationships: I have nothing against this baby.

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