r/relationships: I have nothing against this baby.

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kimbo305: Jun 9, 2007; actually, yeah, I am a little mad

A Wizard of Goatse posted:

there's no way a Starbucks mensroom floor is anything close to as sanitary as a marsh

I meant outside. Like under a table instead of on it. But hell, I'd still do the bathroom floor over a table.

# ? Nov 23, 2021 23:05

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# ? May 30, 2024 06:53

Pope Corky the IX: Dec 18, 2006; What are you looking at?

But why a marsh?

# ? Nov 23, 2021 23:08

ghost emoji: Mar 11, 2016; oooOooOOOooh

AITA for jokingly calling my girlfriend a psychopath for the way she eats? (self.AmItheAsshole)[/quote]

quote:

My girlfriend (f23) and I (m22) have been together since April of this year. We met through mutual friends and immediately clicked, have never gotten on with someone so well. There�s a lot of really tiny unique things about her that I find really funny, her main one being the way she eats.

She was diagnosed with ASD in November of last year, and suspects she also has adhd too due to some traits. Because of that, she was fairly bad sensory issues when it comes to food. She eats very few foods, finds textures really difficult and can�t deal with her food touching.

One of our mutual friends opened a restaurant on Saturday so we went and had some food. It was a buffet type thing, so she went and got her food, came back to the table with our friends and ate. She had about 9 different foods, and ate them all separately, which always makes me laugh. It�s something we laugh about regularly so I turned to my friend next to me and said, as a joke, �the way she eats really is psychopathic isn�t it?�. My girlfriend even laughed and I thought all was fine until we got back to my house.

She got upset telling me it was unfair to make such a harsh comment on something I know she�s insecure about but it�s literally always something we laugh at and I�ve never felt like it�s something she�s insecure about. A few of the friends we were with also said it made them uncomfortable. I feel as though my girlfriend shouldn�t have laughed at the table if she wasn�t okay with it. AITA?

Any time someone says "we all laugh about (sore subject)", I guarantee it means one person constantly makes mean-spirited jokes about the other, and everyone else chuckles out of politeness and awkwardly tries to change the subject.

# ? Nov 23, 2021 23:12

Benagain: Oct 10, 2007; Can you see that I am serious?; Fun Shoe

kimbo305 posted:

I am judging the guy a bit for using the table.
I would have just changed the baby on the floor. It's a Starbucks, not the marsh.

If he's 6'7 I could see using a table being easier than getting down on the floor and I'm going to assume that he's got a portable changing pad so he didn't put the kid directly on the table.

# ? Nov 23, 2021 23:15

Chloe Jessica: Nov 6, 2021; Pick 2.0

EIDE Van Hagar posted:

I have known some people with trouble understanding sarcasm, and vowing that you will remember someone�s fashion choice on your deathbed after they have apologized and when you didn�t even tell people that they were going to a wedding seems like a *pretty clear* joke. to me, at least, that means the only reasons to get offended by the mom dismissing anna�s fashion transgression are:

2) that the mom is saying that anna didn�t actually have the power to ruin the wedding, implying that annas presence isn�t as key to the wedding as all that, and anna is insulted by that

and/or

2) that anna is to be pitied and wasn�t expected to meet the wardrobe requirements on account of being a dirty poor, and anna is insulted by that

either way anna is taking it waaaay too personally.

why are these both number 2 :mad:

AITA for letting my son keep his twin's ashes?

quote:

We used to have three kids. Jane (the eldest), and Castor and Pollux (twins). Castor died unexpectedly about 5 years ago and so we chose to have him cremated. His urn was always in a common area of the house.

Our daughter, Jane[24] was the first to move out a few years ago, whereas Pollux[almost 21] moved out more recently.

When moving out, Pollux asked if he could take his twin's ashes with him. My wife and I agreed with no hesitation because he was, in the family, the person who was the most impacted by Pollux's death. Words cannot begin to describe how close they were.
He didn't say a word for months when he died and, even years after his death, always sits down in front of the urn everyday for at least an hour to think/meditate. Additionally, the boys always said and promised to each other that they would move out together and be roommates when they grow up so we thought it would only be right to grant him this wish.

Anyway, Jane visits us about once every two months. The first time she came after Pollux moved out, she didn't notice Castor's urn was missing. The second time, she asked if we had moved the urn elsewhere and we told her, expecting her to understand, that we let Pollux keep it as Castor was his twin and they promised each other they would live together.
She did not take it well and exploded on us, yelling that he has no right etc.
We told her she can always just visit her brother (who lives closer to her than us anyway and with whom she has a good relationship) to see the urn but she rebutted that it was "symbolic" and that this was unfair. She left the house quickly afterwards.

Now, Jane is sometimes prone to outbursts so we weren't too shocked and still hoped she would just get over it but now Pollux is telling us she's been fighting with him over the phone and calling him some nasty things I won't repeat.

Some of my family members have suggested we just take the urn back home with us if only to restore the peace but i feel like this is also about what Castor would have wanted. He wasn't expecting to die so he obviously didn't write a will but I'm 100% sure he would've wanted to stay with his brother. Even Jane agrees but "he's too dead to care".

# ? Nov 23, 2021 23:20

The Maroon Hawk: May 10, 2008

Chloe Jessica posted:

AITA for letting my son keep his twin's ashes?

quote:
I'm 100% sure he would've wanted to stay with his brother. Even Jane agrees but "he's too dead to care".

What a loving sister! :murder:

# ? Nov 23, 2021 23:27

Pope Corky the IX: Dec 18, 2006; What are you looking at?

Is it out of the question to give everyone a cup of ashes?

# ? Nov 23, 2021 23:43

Bibliotechno Music: Dec 30, 2008

Is there any reason they couldn�t just get a nice mini-urn for the living twin and split up the ashes? Or even better, get two and split his ashes between the three households? Or would that condemn the dead twin to wander the realm of the living until his earthly remains are made whole etc etc

E: haha, beaten by seconds! And by a newly-crowned IK, at that!

# ? Nov 23, 2021 23:43

sullat: Jan 9, 2012

Benagain posted:

If he's 6'7 I could see using a table being easier than getting down on the floor and I'm going to assume that he's got a portable changing pad so he didn't put the kid directly on the table.

Don't even need to be 6'7", changing a diaper while kneeling down is kind of annoying.

# ? Nov 23, 2021 23:44

Pope Corky the IX: Dec 18, 2006; What are you looking at?

This is why I just want my body thrown out of a helicopter when I'm dead. Wherever I land, that's my grave.

# ? Nov 23, 2021 23:47

EIDE Van Hagar: Dec 8, 2000; Beep Boop

Chloe Jessica posted:

why are these both number 2

Because I am a genius and an excellent copy editor.

# ? Nov 23, 2021 23:49

Tobermory: Mar 31, 2011

Chloe Jessica posted:

AITA for letting my son keep his twin's ashes?

Something like this happened to one of my friends. Her wife died, and she naturally wanted to keep the ashes. The wife's abusive shithead father also wanted the ashes, presumably out of narcissistic spite. The father-in-law kept pulling all sorts of poo poo; angry phone calls, legal threats, hiring detectives, stalking, harassing her friends, harassing her employer, and on and on. Finally she got a duplicate urn, we all filled it part way up with cigarette/joint ash, then she gave it to the father-in-law. As soon as he got the urn, he vanished, and as far as I know nobody's heard from him again.

# ? Nov 23, 2021 23:59

InsertPotPun: Apr 16, 2018; Pissy Bitch stan

a relative stole another relative's ashes from me, but they spilled a bunch into a ziplock bag for me to keep.

# ? Nov 24, 2021 00:06

Invisible Clergy: Sep 25, 2015; "Behold, I will corrupt your seed, and spread dung upon your faces"

Malachi 2:3

Tobermory posted:

Something like this happened to one of my friends. Her wife died, and she naturally wanted to keep the ashes. The wife's abusive shithead father also wanted the ashes, presumably out of narcissistic spite. The father-in-law kept pulling all sorts of poo poo; angry phone calls, legal threats, hiring detectives, stalking, harassing her friends, harassing her employer, and on and on. Finally she got a duplicate urn, we all filled it part way up with cigarette/joint ash, then she gave it to the father-in-law. As soon as he got the urn, he vanished, and as far as I know nobody's heard from him again.

Yeah, this is the obvious solution to this problem.

# ? Nov 24, 2021 00:06

wheatpuppy: Apr 25, 2008; YOU HAVE MY POST!

Tobermory posted:

Something like this happened to one of my friends. Her wife died, and she naturally wanted to keep the ashes. The wife's abusive shithead father also wanted the ashes, presumably out of narcissistic spite. The father-in-law kept pulling all sorts of poo poo; angry phone calls, legal threats, hiring detectives, stalking, harassing her friends, harassing her employer, and on and on. Finally she got a duplicate urn, we all filled it part way up with cigarette/joint ash, then she gave it to the father-in-law. As soon as he got the urn, he vanished, and as far as I know nobody's heard from him again.

Serious question - does anyone ever actually *look* in a cremains urn to verify its contents? I honestly wouldn't know exactly what it's supposed to look like.

I remember reading about that one funeral home whose ovens were broken so they just tossed the bodies in an empty lot out back and gave people boxes/bags of plaster and sawdust. So I would assume you can pretty much hand over an appropriately-weighted sealed container and feel pretty safe nobody would know?

# ? Nov 24, 2021 00:10

kalel: Jun 19, 2012

Tobermory posted:

Something like this happened to one of my friends. Her wife died, and she naturally wanted to keep the ashes. The wife's abusive shithead father also wanted the ashes, presumably out of narcissistic spite. The father-in-law kept pulling all sorts of poo poo; angry phone calls, legal threats, hiring detectives, stalking, harassing her friends, harassing her employer, and on and on. Finally she got a duplicate urn, we all filled it part way up with cigarette/joint ash, then she gave it to the father-in-law. As soon as he got the urn, he vanished, and as far as I know nobody's heard from him again.

lol hell yeah

# ? Nov 24, 2021 00:10

Invisible Clergy: Sep 25, 2015; "Behold, I will corrupt your seed, and spread dung upon your faces"

Malachi 2:3

wheatpuppy posted:

Serious question - does anyone ever actually *look* in a cremains urn to verify its contents? I honestly wouldn't know exactly what it's supposed to look like.

I remember reading about that one funeral home whose ovens were broken so they just tossed the bodies in an empty lot out back and gave people boxes/badgs of plaster and sawdust. So I would assume you can pretty much hand over an appropriately-weighted sealed container and feel pretty safe nobody would know?

It's fairly common not to. Many people opt for a sealed one and put them on a mantel. If not, people will usually get the cremains in an openable container to scatter them someplace. It's definitely not common to take them home in an openable container unless you're planning on eating them like that one woman on one of TLC's freakshow. Cremains are off-white and have a texture like coarse sand or gravel. If you've ever seen or handled bonemeal from like a gardening sore, it's pretty much the same stuff.

You can indeed do this, and many places do.

# ? Nov 24, 2021 00:19

SyNack Sassimov: May 4, 2006; Let the robot win.
��--Captain James T. Vader

EIDE Van Hagar posted:

2) that the mom is saying that anna didn�t actually have the power to ruin the wedding, implying that annas presence isn�t as key to the wedding as all that, and anna is insulted by that

and/or

2) that anna is to be pitied and wasn�t expected to meet the wardrobe requirements on account of being a dirty poor, and anna is insulted by that

Chloe Jessica posted:

why are these both number 2

It's a poo poo post what did you expect

# ? Nov 24, 2021 00:21

Grape: Nov 16, 2017; Happily shilling for China!

A Wizard of Goatse posted:

there's no way a Starbucks mensroom floor is anything close to as sanitary as a marsh

Corpse rear end is also unsanitary but well

# ? Nov 24, 2021 00:28

Invisible Clergy: Sep 25, 2015; "Behold, I will corrupt your seed, and spread dung upon your faces"

Malachi 2:3

AITA for still being close with a man I once loved

quote:

I'm writing this on a phone, I am not sure if that's gonna mess up the formatting. I apologize if it does.

I was in love with my best friend for almost 2 years, let's call him John, before I decided to cut contact with him because he kept sending mixed signs and I realized it's time to move on.

Unfortunately, I started talking to him again recently. I'm dating someone else, someone I love more than anything and even though I might not have romantic feelings for John anymore I still care about him as a friend.

My boyfriend said it makes him uncomfortable that I talk to John every day and that we talk about very intimate things. He's never said I shouldn't talk / be friends with him, but I can tell he's jealous.

Since we've started dating, John and I haven't flirted, but I can see how some things he said can be weird. For example, saying how he wants to invite me to sleep over at his place and cook for me, or making sexual jokes (that don't include the two of us, obviously)

I've distanced myself from him, because multiple people including friends and family say they are convinced John has feelings for me (Which I know is not true, he had a chance before and never took it)

But I feel like with all things considered, it's slightly disrespectful to still talk to someone I had feelings for before, especially since I would be very uncomfortable with my boyfriend doing the same.

However, I could also just be dramatic and blowing things out of proportion.

# ? Nov 24, 2021 00:29

Cythereal: Nov 8, 2009; I love the potoo,
and the potoo loves you.

Clicked on my bookmark of the old thread on accident, then went to a random page and found a good story about a complete loving idiot getting what's coming to him.

I [35 M] caught using a hidden camera to peek at my sister-in-law [22 F] naked. I'm as hosed as hosed can be.

quote:

I don't know where to begin. I'm 35 and married, no kids. Wife is also 35. My wife's sister, whom we'll call Stephanie, is often over at our house with her husband. I didn't mean to, but I always found myself staring at Stephanie and being extremely attracted to her. I really couldn't help it. I'm devoted to my wife, but Stephanie looks just like my wife did a decade ago, so how was I not supposed to be attracted to her? Besides that, Stephanie and her husband like to come over and use our pool and all those times of seeing her in her bikini didn't help.

Well today I royally hosed up and now our whole extended family is probably going to implode.

Stephanie and her husband are putting in some fancy new shower and tub. They only have one bathroom and they could be without theirs for a week or two. Well, Stephanie called today and asked if she could pop over and take a shower.

I don't know what came over me. Something about the thought of her being naked, right here, almost close enough to see, just sent me into overdrive. I'm not trying to make excuses, but I honestly don't think I've ever been that horny. It really clouded my judgement and if I had just went off and jerked off or something I know I never would've done what I did next.

I have this motion-activated pen camera. Records on a mini memory card. Looks just like a normal pen except for one little dot where the lens is that you'd never really notice. I don't have it for any nefarious reasons. I bought it several months back when I was dealing with a situation at my work where I needed to protect myself legally.

Well, my dumb rear end ran and got that pen and planted it in the bathroom before Stephanie came over. She arrived, and I puttered around in the garage while she showered. Honestly, I wasn't even nervous, just excited. I really didn't even consider the idea that I'd get caught. She finished showering, I assume told my wife bye, and I saw her leave from inside the garage.

Well, when I went and retrieved the pen and downloaded the video a little later, I was in for a horrible surprise.

The video showed Stephanie come in, undress, shower, the normal stuff. After a few minutes, she got out and started doing the weird naked lotion rituals that women all seem to do.

That's when she stopped mid-lotioning and stared intently at the camera for several seconds. You can imagine my reaction when watching it. I went from being more horny than I've ever been in my life and excited at finally seeing the object of my lust naked to feeling like I was going to throw up. I knew what I was seeing, but I didn't believe it. But then Stephanie reached out and picked up the pen and brought it in close to her face and I knew I was completely hosed. She stared at it for several seconds and it was obvious from her shocked expression that she knew what it was and then she quickly put it back down with the camera pointing down and the rest of the video was just blackness.

I don't know how she noticed it. The only thing I can figure is that my wife must have told her about the pen at some point and told her about my work situation. Maybe she even showed it to her. You'd never suspect in a million years that this pen had a camera in it, though, even if you picked it up. So somehow she knew about it.

And now, hours later, I'm sitting here in hell waiting for the other shoe to drop and feeling sick. This will destroy my extended family. My wife, I have no idea what she'll do. I don't think she'd leave me over simply peeking at someone naked, but if the fallout with her family is bad enough she might.

The waiting is killing me. I know it's coming. I assume Stephanie hasn't seen her husband yet tonight (he works late) or he'd be over here trying to kick my rear end right now. He's a big jealous guy and not the type to let this sort of thing slide AT ALL.

Should I just preemptively tell my wife and beg for mercy? Should I try to talk to Stephanie and beg her not to say anything? I have no idea what to do. I just want to crawl in a hole and die. I wish I had a time machine.

tl;dr Got super horny and planted a spy cam to check out my sister-in-law naked. She found it. I'm hosed and waiting and don't know what to do next.

# ? Nov 24, 2021 00:30

A Wizard of Goatse: Dec 14, 2014

Tobermory posted:

Something like this happened to one of my friends. Her wife died, and she naturally wanted to keep the ashes. The wife's abusive shithead father also wanted the ashes, presumably out of narcissistic spite. The father-in-law kept pulling all sorts of poo poo; angry phone calls, legal threats, hiring detectives, stalking, harassing her friends, harassing her employer, and on and on. Finally she got a duplicate urn, we all filled it part way up with cigarette/joint ash, then she gave it to the father-in-law. As soon as he got the urn, he vanished, and as far as I know nobody's heard from him again.

this seemed clever until I considered just how many cigarettes you'd have to bang through to get enough ash on short notice

# ? Nov 24, 2021 00:31

BIG FLUFFY DOG: Feb 16, 2011; On the internet, nobody knows you're a dog.

AITA for refusing to report my co worker for sexual harassment despite my husbands insistence?

quote:

I work with a guy named Carlos, and he�s just a bit socially awkward. But he�s sweet all things considered. Last week he asked me out on a date and I declined, I told my husband about it when he asked me how my day went that evening. He seemed a little unsettled but didn�t say anything.

Fast forward to last Friday, and my co worker was having a birthday party for her son, and I went and brought my husband. Carlos came up to me and told me my dress looked nice, and I thanked him. Husband didn�t say anything then.

But once we got into the car he started talking about how he has, �a lot of nerve�. And that his, �inappropriate behavior is escalating�. I thought he was joking so even though I didn�t find it funny I laughed. But he was serious.

I told him it wasn�t a big deal, and after a bit more back and forth we moved past it. Until last night when Carlos gave me a ride home after my car wouldn�t start, and my husband wouldn�t pick up his phone.

Yes, Carlos offered, but only because Nick wouldn�t pick up. I think the idea of reporting him is ridiculous. But my husband is now saying if I don�t, �put a stop to this, he�s (he being Carlos) gonna do the same thing to other girls at work�. Idek what that is supposed to mean tbh. But, AITA for not reporting him?

if he knew I was married when he asked me out it wasn�t because I told him

# ? Nov 24, 2021 00:34

wheatpuppy: Apr 25, 2008; YOU HAVE MY POST!

Cythereal posted:

Clicked on my bookmark of the old thread on accident, then went to a random page and found a good story about a complete loving idiot getting what's coming to him.

I [35 M] caught using a hidden camera to peek at my sister-in-law [22 F] naked. I'm as hosed as hosed can be.

The solution, way too late to save this guy: erase the recording of the sister, replace it with a recording of his own rear end in a top hat. Tell the wife "oh man lucky this pen is waterproof, I took it in the shower with me to check out that weird lump to see if it was hemmorrhoids and accidentally left it there" whew, bullet dodged.

# ? Nov 24, 2021 00:35

MagusofStars: Mar 31, 2012

wheatpuppy posted:

Serious question - does anyone ever actually *look* in a cremains urn to verify its contents? I honestly wouldn't know exactly what it's supposed to look like.

I remember reading about that one funeral home whose ovens were broken so they just tossed the bodies in an empty lot out back and gave people boxes/bags of plaster and sawdust. So I would assume you can pretty much hand over an appropriately-weighted sealed container and feel pretty safe nobody would know?

According to Google, cremated ashes are white to gray and feel similar to coarse sand - which is apparently completely different from the smooth flaky cigarette or wood ash that most people expect.

So between people mistakenly assuming what ashes are like and the odds it'll won't ever get opened anyways, seems pretty likely you could safely get away with "this is totally the ashes, definitely being honest here, no way you could fake that sort of thing".

# ? Nov 24, 2021 00:38

MarcusSA: Sep 23, 2007

Invisible Clergy posted:

AITA for still being close with a man I once loved

No one Can be this dense.

# ? Nov 24, 2021 00:48

Squatch Ambassador: Nov 12, 2008; What? Never seen a shaved Squatch before?

Cythereal posted:

Clicked on my bookmark of the old thread on accident, then went to a random page and found a good story about a complete loving idiot getting what's coming to him.

I [35 M] caught using a hidden camera to peek at my sister-in-law [22 F] naked. I'm as hosed as hosed can be.

There's a couple updates to this, although the first was deleted. He seemingly got away with it and naturally decided to keep digging.

(Update 2) I [35 M] got caught using a hidden camera to peek at my sister-in-law [22 F] naked. I'm as hosed as hosed can be.

quote:

Well, everybody keeps PMing me for an update and I finally do have something to tell, although I could use some insight since I don't really understand what's going on. Also, I'm reluctant to even bother posting this since the mods deleted my last update. And for those that have been PMing me asking what it said, all my last update said was that as of like 36 hours after the incident Stephanie still apparently hadn't told my brother-in-law or my wife and I was just sitting around with stress cramps.

Well, here's the latest. Nothing really happened all weekend. I heard my wife talking like normal to Stephanie a couple times. I actually started to think maybe I had misread Stephanie's reaction on the video and that maybe the universe was going to take pity on my poor stupid rear end and that my family wouldn't be destroyed.

Now I don't know what to think because Stephanie called last night and again wanted to come over and take a shower.

Right away, I'm thinking, "What the gently caress?" I mean, it didn't make any sense. Even if I was wrong and she assumed the camera pen was off, it just seemed weird that she'd want to come over here and shower again. Granted, our house is more convenient, but I know they have other places they could till their bathroom is done. My wife's parents only live another ten minutes or so away, for example.

Then I started to get the paranoid idea that maybe she was going to see if I did it again and try to bust me in the act this time. And I had an idea. I decided I'd put the pen in the shower again, but this time turned off. And as I said I already deleted the video almost immediately. So if she decided to swipe the pen or something, she'd see that it was empty.

It seemed like a really elegant way to get out of the whole mess. And I had what I thought was a particularly brilliant idea on top of it. After I set the pen out, I got one of my wife's really long hairs out of her hair brush and draped it across the camera pen. That way, if she didn't swipe the camera altogether, I'd at least know if she picked it up again and fiddled with it. If you open it up, it's got an LED inside that shows when it's on.

Well, Stephanie came over. I hid in the garage again. To be honest, I didn't have the balls to face her and was worried that my face would give something away. But when I heard her leaving my curiosity got the better of me and I decided to casually stroll through as she was leaving.

When I walked by the living room where she was telling my wife goodbye, she glanced at me and I swear to God she actually smirked. And my heart just sank.

As soon as she was gone, I went to the bathroom and to my complete confusion the pen was unmoved. The hair was still draped across it where I left it and it looked to be in the exact same position.

So... What the gently caress? Why didn't she check it? Did she just assume it was off? Or did she assume it was on and wanted to make sure last time wasn't just a fluke and now she's going to bust my rear end to everyone after all? I thought I had found a creative way to get out of this mess, but she didn't do what I expected her to do and I have no idea why.

Can anyone see what I'm missing?

tl;dr Sister-in-law came over and showered again. I planted the empty, turned off camera again so she'd think it was there for no reason, but she apparently didn't examine it and now I have no idea what she's thinking or doing. And I'm sick at my stomach again.

# ? Nov 24, 2021 00:51

Zulily Zoetrope: Jun 1, 2011; Muldoon

She obviously never thought the OP was a turbo-creep who would actually record her in the shower, just fiddled with the weird pen because there was a weird pen there, and never thought about it again, and everything else was in the OP's sick head.

That's the vibe I had since the original post, and I'm mad at reddit for not goading him into confessing.

E: v also a valid option

Zulily Zoetrope fucked around with this message at 00:58 on Nov 24, 2021

# ? Nov 24, 2021 00:56

Cythereal: Nov 8, 2009; I love the potoo,
and the potoo loves you.

That or it was written one-handed, that'll teach me to not scroll past the original post.

# ? Nov 24, 2021 00:56

Invisible Clergy: Sep 25, 2015; "Behold, I will corrupt your seed, and spread dung upon your faces"

Malachi 2:3

BIG FLUFFY DOG posted:

AITA for refusing to report my co worker for sexual harassment despite my husbands insistence?

So OP is concealing the fact she's married from Carlos to encourage him. Totally normal behavior.

# ? Nov 24, 2021 00:57

house of the dad: Jul 4, 2005

Zulily Zoetrope posted:

She obviously never thought the OP was a turbo-creep who would actually record her in the shower, just fiddled with the weird pen because there was a weird pen there, and never thought about it again, and everything else was in the OP's sick head.

That's the vibe I had since the original post, and I'm mad at reddit for not goading him into confessing.

E: v also a valid option

The guy is trying as hard as humanly possible to get caught so this might just be one of those delayed gratification situations.

# ? Nov 24, 2021 01:01

kimbo305: Jun 9, 2007; actually, yeah, I am a little mad

Benagain posted:

If he's 6'7 I could see using a table being easier than getting down on the floor and I'm going to assume that he's got a portable changing pad so he didn't put the kid directly on the table.

He did have a pad; all's the more to do it on the floor. Though I suppose it would still need to get cleaned up by the staff.

And I don't think being taller gives you that much of a disadvantage at floor level? Do really tall people have trouble tying their shoes?

# ? Nov 24, 2021 01:04

darkwasthenight: Jan 7, 2011; GENE TRAITOR

Chloe Jessica posted:

why are these both number 2

AITA for letting my son keep his twin's ashes?

Daughter needs therapy, not ashes. She's not reacting fairly because she's still hosed up about his death.

# ? Nov 24, 2021 01:06

Arsenic Lupin: Apr 12, 2012; This particularly rapid💨 unintelligible 😖patter💁 isn't generally heard🧏‍♂️, and if it is🤔, it doesn't matter💁.

Invisible Clergy posted:

It's definitely not common to take them home in an openable container unless you're planning on eating them like that one woman on one of TLC's freakshow.

Huh? My dad's ashes sat in a plastic box in the top of the coat closet because my mother was trying to figure out where to scatter them. Indecisiveness rules all. Then she got dementia and hid it, and then when I was packing up the house I couldn't find it. That was fun. It did eventually turn up.

For now, he's still in that box. My brother is working on endowing an official professors' memorial something at the college he taught at, and scattering there.

# ? Nov 24, 2021 01:26

Bruceski: Aug 21, 2007; The tools of a hero mean nothing without a solid core.

MagusofStars posted:

According to Google, cremated ashes are white to gray and feel similar to coarse sand - which is apparently completely different from the smooth flaky cigarette or wood ash that most people expect.

So between people mistakenly assuming what ashes are like and the odds it'll won't ever get opened anyways, seems pretty likely you could safely get away with "this is totally the ashes, definitely being honest here, no way you could fake that sort of thing".

Yeah, we scattered my dad in the ocean and the consistency was very similar. The ashes were dustier but once he went in the water it was the same as the mud.

# ? Nov 24, 2021 01:41

Pope Corky the IX: Dec 18, 2006; What are you looking at?

We are mud.

# ? Nov 24, 2021 01:47

Cthulu Carl: Apr 16, 2006

A Wizard of Goatse posted:

this seemed clever until I considered just how many cigarettes you'd have to bang through to get enough ash on short notice

Just make friends with smokers for a bit or fins some public ashtrays that can be emptied.

Or just clean out a charcoal grill.

# ? Nov 24, 2021 01:49

Barudak: May 7, 2007

All Hail Pope Corky the IX, may your reign be long and terrible

# ? Nov 24, 2021 01:50

pentyne: Nov 7, 2012

BIG FLUFFY DOG posted:

AITA for refusing to report my co worker for sexual harassment despite my husbands insistence?

That's a pretty short trail of bread crumbs to follow to make it obvious the husband is cheating on OP with a coworker.

# ? Nov 24, 2021 02:02

Adbot: ADBOT LOVES YOU

# ? May 30, 2024 06:53

ghost emoji: Mar 11, 2016; oooOooOOOooh

Cythereal posted:

Clicked on my bookmark of the old thread on accident, then went to a random page and found a good story about a complete loving idiot getting what's coming to him.

I [35 M] caught using a hidden camera to peek at my sister-in-law [22 F] naked. I'm as hosed as hosed can be.

Guarantee �a situation at my work where I needed to protect myself legally� is a pending sexual harassment case.

# ? Nov 24, 2021 02:18

The Something Awful Forums > Main > General Bullshit > r/relationships: I have nothing against this baby.

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