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Z the IVth
Jan 28, 2009

The trouble with your "expendable machines"
Fun Shoe

Sagebrush posted:

put them in a soundproof plastic bubble imo

Show me on the doll where the baby touched you.

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MrChips
Jun 10, 2005

FLIGHT SAFETY TIP: Fatties out first

Sagebrush posted:

That's perfect because if you try to take a baby <2 years old on a plane you're a sociopath

No.

PeterCat posted:

Has there been a rash of 2-5 year olds getting Covid from traveling maskless on planes in Europe?

Because, as I said, the cutoff in the US is 2 and the lowest I can find in Europe is 6.

The solution we've come up with is we're just going to lie and say he turns 2 in January.

No.



Consider yourselves sufficiently warned to a) don't be a loving psychopath about children on airplanes, just loving deal with it and b) don't come in here to "JuSt AsK sOmE qUeStIoNs"

EvenWorseOpinions
Jun 10, 2017
I want to take my three year old flying because I think he'll enjoy it and I'm a sociopath. Can your average 172 take a car seat somehow? Do kids try to pull the mixture if you have them on your lap?

This is a genuine question

MrYenko
Jun 18, 2012

#2 isn't ALWAYS bad...

EvenWorseOpinions posted:

I want to take my three year old flying because I think he'll enjoy it and I'm a sociopath. Can your average 172 take a car seat somehow? Do kids try to pull the mixture if you have them on your lap?

This is a genuine question

Oh boy do I have an AC for you.

Short answer yes, you can use a car seat in a 172. Make sure to get them earpro as well.

Just like voting for republicans, take your kids flying early, and often!

standard.deviant
May 17, 2012

Globally Indigent
Just in case the AC is unclear, you don’t use a car seat in an airplane. There are separate FAA-approved restraints for kids in planes.

Humphreys
Jan 26, 2013

We conceived a way to use my mother as a porn mule


standard.deviant posted:

There are separate FAA-approved restraints for kids in planes.

According to some, it's duct tape :P

(I'm kidding)

ImplicitAssembler
Jan 24, 2013

Z the IVth posted:

Show me on the doll where the baby touched you.

That would be the 10 hour flying from LHR to YVR, with a toddler *screaming* for about 8 hours.

Put them in the cargo hold...and their parents with them.

BIG HEADLINE
Jun 13, 2006

"Stand back, Ottawan ruffian, or face my lumens!"

ImplicitAssembler posted:

That would be the 10 hour flying from LHR to YVR, with a toddler *screaming* for about 8 hours.

Put them in the cargo hold...and their parents with them.

I've only had this experience once, thank gently caress.

Five hour red-eye from LAX to IAD on Virgin America back in 2015. Four Chinese nationals board first - clearly well-to-do as the wife's decked out and wearing sunglasses. The husband and wife get comfy in First, while the poo poo-scared-looking nanny they dragged onto the plane with them get saddled with the kid back in steerage with us. I'm a little :ohdear: because the kid seems wired for being so late at night but I figure she's still on China time and probably slept across the Pacific. There's also an ominous message on the screen that the IFE is unavailable, which I'm hoping is just while we're on the ground. Turns out it wasn't, and that was terrible for two reasons.

I can never sleep sitting up, so sleeping on a plane is straight out for me unless I've got a lie flat seat. And if the IFE is down, hopefully the in-flight Gogo is working.

Except it wasn't. And the IFE wasn't working either, even when we got to altitude. The only thing that was working on the screen was their "promo" video channel and the flight status and progression map. The little girl starts getting bored. But rather than get bored and nap like any other child would, this little hellion decides it's a great time to *serenade the plane*. In Mandarin. Her evil little eyes transfixed on the promo channel flickering on the screen in front of her. It doesn't matter that there's no audio, it doesn't matter if she can't read the text, it's movement and colors and that's enough to keep her interested. After the first thirty minutes, the nanny reads the increasingly homicidal vibe of the plane and, in a demure panic, tries shushing the little girl, to no avail. The little girl knows she has authority over the nanny. The two women next to me are *bugging the gently caress out* about this because *they* have no problem sleeping on a plane (and were hoping to get some sleep) but they do have a problem nodding off to a chorus of NYYYY NYAH NYAH NYAH NYUUAAANNNNAHNNN (I still hear this in my head sometimes, six years hence) that has a range of at least 20 rows (I got bored and had the aisle seat).

FAs did gently caress all, probably because the parents were in First, and honestly, you're trying to reason with pure Chaos in the form of a (I'm guessing) four year old who might not even speak English or understand you. A flight attendant rates lower than a toothless nanny to such a creature. The parents never came back, either.

She kept it up the entire...loving...flight. I have never seen so many adults giving the death stare to a child than I did when we finally deplaned.

I learned a very valuable lesson that night. Never fly again without earplugs or noise-canceling earbuds or headphones.

Thank god I had a few non-data-using games on my phone. Never fly without Seedship installed.

PeterCat
Apr 8, 2020

Believe women.

Cojawfee posted:

Can the FAA not still revoke the pilots' licenses? They still have to abide by the FAA's rules while flying in the US.

Well, given that they were Army pilots they probably all hold a commercial instrument ticket. You pay a man in Daleville (one of the town adjacent to Ft Rucker, Home of Army Aviation) a fee, he spends a day teaching you the test, then you take the test, and bam, you now have a commercial rotary wing instrument ticket.

That said, the FAA can't violate you for something you did while flying on a military status. Public Use aircraft fall under a different set of rules, though Army Regulation 95-1 states that Army Aviators will abide by FAA regulations while in the national airspace, so they could face consequences for violating the AR.

PeterCat fucked around with this message at 13:49 on Dec 8, 2021

Warbird
May 23, 2012

America's Favorite Dumbass

Small point of order, Daleville is the town Rucker is at/in/more or less completely surrounds. The next over would be Dothan/Enterprise.

meltie
Nov 9, 2003

Not a sodding fridge.
I flew 8h sat in the same row as a newborn. Not a single problem - was a 787 so perhaps the more natural cabin pressure meant that the little one didn't get problems with their ears?

Their family were so scared that there would be problems and nope, everyone around was just understanding and lovely, and in the end not a peep.

A++ would dreamliner near a kid again.

PainterofCrap
Oct 17, 2002

hey bebe



Took my 3-1/2-year-old on his first flight in 1996. He thought that he was on a bus, even after looking out the window. We gave him a juice bottle for climb-out & descent to keep his tubes open. He colored a bit & dropped off. That was it.

Bill Cosby did a bit on this, about Jeffrey & his mom on a flight to Phila from LA.

Warbird
May 23, 2012

America's Favorite Dumbass

One of my last work flights was beside a little dude that must have been about 2 or 3. He was a blast, very entertaining little fellow. Totally get folks not wanting to be on a plane with a crying baby, but kids are fun. This said, the wife wants to do the ATL to PEK hop with the 6th month old in a year or so and gently caress that.

marumaru
May 20, 2013



BIG HEADLINE posted:

Never fly without earplugs or noise-canceling earbuds or headphones.

Salami Surgeon
Jan 21, 2001

Don't close. Don't close.


Nap Ghost
Noise canceling headphones are worth the price just to drown out the constant begging for you to sign up for credit cards.

fknlo
Jul 6, 2009


Fun Shoe

Salami Surgeon posted:

Noise canceling headphones are worth the price just to drown out the constant begging for you to sign up for credit cards.

When the gently caress did this start? I’ve flown frontier several times and never experienced it until I was flying to see my mom before she died and they gave what had to be a 10 minute credit card ad in the middle of the flight.

That flight also had the row behind me being a mom and 4 or 5 boys all like 6 and under and I probably would have lost my mind if it wasn’t occupied thinking about my mom.

I flew southwest back and got a credit card spiel from them too for the first time ever.

Sagebrush
Feb 26, 2012

I think the credit card sales pitch is par for the course if you fly Frontier or Spirit, but yeah the last time I flew American they were doing that poo poo too. Really trashy

hobbesmaster
Jan 28, 2008

The big three US airlines seem to go back and forth on how aggressive they are about pushing their credit cards? Delta was horrendous about it circa 2010 but don't seem to be a big bother about it recently.

Kia Soul Enthusias
May 9, 2004

zoom-zoom
Toilet Rascal
Those helicopters were well over the cable

Sagebrush
Feb 26, 2012

By 14 CFR 91.119 those helicopters needed to be at least 1000 feet above the tallest obstacle within 2000 feet laterally, which is the top of the stadium. They definitely weren't.

Helicopters have an exemption to minimum altitude requirements if they are operating "without hazard to persons on the surface" but flying through a packed stadium is not that.

hobbesmaster
Jan 28, 2008

It'd be a pretty big fuckup if they didn't file the form for a waiver from that regulation
https://www.faa.gov/documentLibrary/media/Form/FAA_Form_7711-2.pdf
https://www.ecfr.gov/current/title-14/chapter-I/subchapter-F/part-91#91.905

Groda
Mar 17, 2005

Hair Elf

Salami Surgeon posted:

Noise canceling headphones are worth the price just to drown out the constant begging for you to sign up for credit cards.

Meanwhile on Ryanair they're pushing lottery tickets.

Kia Soul Enthusias
May 9, 2004

zoom-zoom
Toilet Rascal

Sagebrush posted:

By 14 CFR 91.119 those helicopters needed to be at least 1000 feet above the tallest obstacle within 2000 feet laterally, which is the top of the stadium. They definitely weren't.

Helicopters have an exemption to minimum altitude requirements if they are operating "without hazard to persons on the surface" but flying through a packed stadium is not that.

Yeah I agree with that, just stating that them flying under the cable is an optical illusion. They were actually over it.

ryanrs
Jul 12, 2011

Salami Surgeon posted:

Noise canceling headphones are worth the price just to drown out the constant begging for you to sign up for credit cards.

Oh, they don't force you to take them off for the marketing, like they do for the safety talk?

Salami Surgeon
Jan 21, 2001

Don't close. Don't close.


Nap Ghost
They don't force me to take them off for the safety talk. They don't even make me take them off when briefing me in an exit row. I fly almost exclusively American, but it is the same for Delta. At least they've stopped having the FAs traipse up and down the aisles with the paper applications.

Sagebrush
Feb 26, 2012

instead of expensive noise cancelling electronics you can also just buy 10 cent foamy earplugs

Freaquency
May 10, 2007

"Yes I can hear you, I don't have ear cancer!"

I feel awful for the FAs when they have to do the credit card spiel and then the walk of shame down the aisle with the applications. That’s not what they signed on for, but then some big brain in an office somewhere asked how they could get more people to sign up for cards and some rear end in a top hat just volunteered them for it.

KYOON GRIFFEY JR
Apr 12, 2010



Runner-up, TRP Sack Race 2021/22
i talked to a Delta FA and at least at the time (2014?) the people who chose to do it were volunteers and did it because they got a hefty commission on in flight sign ups

hobbesmaster
Jan 28, 2008

FAs used to get between $50-$100 on each approved application, it wouldn't surprise me if the pushier ones actually got some nice extra cash out of that.

I think some airlines had commissions on the duty free carts too?

ranbo das
Oct 16, 2013


A good set of comfy noise canceling headphones are up there with precheck in "once you have it you never go back" territory

Freaquency
May 10, 2007

"Yes I can hear you, I don't have ear cancer!"

Ah well then I retract my pity because I hate hearing it and it always manages to cut through my earphones even with the ANC on.

Kia Soul Enthusias
May 9, 2004

zoom-zoom
Toilet Rascal
Active noise canceling will not nullify talking or crying, just repetitive rhythmic sounds. If the headphones are well isolated it'll have that effect passively of course.

Zero One
Dec 30, 2004

HAIL TO THE VICTORS!
You need ANC and something to listen to.

I never fly without content downloaded to my device. Just in case the airline provided stuff or Wi-Fi isn't working.

PeterCat
Apr 8, 2020

Believe women.

Warbird posted:

Small point of order, Daleville is the town Rucker is at/in/more or less completely surrounds. The next over would be Dothan/Enterprise.

You're forgetting Ozark. I do too most of the time though the Walmart there is a much more authentic southern experience than the one in Enterprise.

mllaneza
Apr 28, 2007

Veteran, Bermuda Triangle Expeditionary Force, 1993-1952




hobbesmaster posted:

FAs used to get between $50-$100 on each approved application, it wouldn't surprise me if the pushier ones actually got some nice extra cash out of that.

You can't tip an FA, but that might be a good workaround for rewarding a really good FA with someone else' money.

bull3964
Nov 18, 2000

DO YOU HEAR THAT? THAT'S THE SOUND OF ME PATTING MYSELF ON THE BACK.


Really goes to show you the level of fees and interest on those things if they can afford to shell out $50-$100 per approved application.

hobbesmaster
Jan 28, 2008

They generally have annual fees on the order of $100/year at a minimum.

azflyboy
Nov 9, 2005
Alaska wants their flight attendants to hawk the crap out of the credit cards, especially since the poor SOB's at Horizon only make something like $15k/yr, so they basically need the credit card bonuses to afford things like food. The card itself is pretty poo poo, so I'm always amazed how many of my co-workers pay the annual fee to have a credit card that gets them miles on the airline they have free travel on anyway.

I've had several FA's try to sell me the credit card while I'm deadheading in uniform, and the worst pitch I heard was this 7 minute long thing that starts off being about masks, then segues into something about "Karens", then segues into a thing about Bora Bora, and finally moved into selling a credit card.

This was on a 5am flight, so I'm pretty sure you could smell the "shut the hell up, I'm trying to sleep!" vibes coming from everyone in the cabin.

Zero One
Dec 30, 2004

HAIL TO THE VICTORS!
I got a Delta Amex years ago when I moved cross country. Usually the free checked bag covers the annual fee across my flying home a few times a year. But now Amex has been doing some special offers recently including a $10/month credit on restaurants so I've gotten much more back than I've paid. Plus group 1 boarding.

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Psion
Dec 13, 2002

eVeN I KnOw wHaT CoRnEr gAs iS
I think Alaska's card only really makes sense if you use the companion fare every year since that's where you can save a few hundred, definitely more than the annual fees. Any solo travelers, why bother, ever?

Maybe if you need to buy a lot of snacks onboard? I'm thinking an entire cart's worth of cheese platters all stacked up on your tiny little tray table level of snacks.

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