buttcoin: my kids know me as this ape

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Serious Hardware/Software Crap > YOSPOS > buttcoin: my kids know me as this ape

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SubG: Aug 19, 2004; It's a hard world for little things.

polyester concept posted:

i know im stupid but I find it extremely hard to figure out what the gently caress people like that are even talking about. something about how they talk mixed with twitter�s awful threading makes it all gibberish to me

that's kinda by design. you have one layer where crypto true believers are difficult to understand because they're an extremely online community and extremely online communities fuckin *love* creating a scene-specific lingo so you can't talk about anything without it being impenetrable inside baseball to anyone outside the club. basically tvtropes disease

you have another layer on top of that where there's a certain amount of unavoidable technical terminology because the field is loosely related to cryptography, mathematics, and information security. this is actually just a small fraction of the problem, because cryptography is just a small fraction of "crypto" in this sense. but you've got *another* layer of bullshit that's crypto bros looking at cryptography and finding it confusing and complicated and so making up a bunch of confusing and complicated nonsense in the belief that they're talking about cryptography. this is basically the little kid putting on dad's shirt and tie and playing grown up in front of the mirror, but with bitcoin

and then on top of that you have the apex crypto loons that are wackadoodle ideologues, like sovcits and cryptoanarchists and poo poo like that. and they're *natively* impossible to talk to--like the guy where you can't ask him what he had for lunch without getting a half an hour about the jfk assassination or whatever. and then you lay all that other poo poo on top of it

so you get like timecube only written for tropers by someone who's trying to sound like geordi la forge yelling poo poo about tachyons at an ipad while the warp core dumps

# ? Dec 30, 2021 02:47

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# ? Jun 5, 2024 08:20

infernal machines: Oct 11, 2012; we monitor many frequencies. we listen always. came a voice, out of the babel of tongues, speaking to us. it played us a mighty dub.

i have yet to see anyone explain how blockchains will result in free anything, for literally any definition of the word free. like, no poo poo, there's all the info libre folks repeating the mantra of a "free" internet without ever explaining a)what part a blockchain plays in that, in any way and b)that isn't done by systems that are not blockchains

then there's the "privacy" through a completely public, inviolable, permanent record of everything anyone has ever done on it that is, optimistically, pseudonymous, as long as no one cares to look. no one ever seems to even acknowledge that either

you'd almost get the impression the people raving about this "technology" have never seen a distributed database before

infernal machines fucked around with this message at 03:39 on Dec 30, 2021

# ? Dec 30, 2021 03:33

ultrafilter: Aug 23, 2007; It's okay if you have any questions.

infernal machines posted:

i have yet to see anyone explain how blockchains will result in free anything, for literally any definition of the word free.

It's like this:

Blockchain
???
~~Profit~~Freedom

# ? Dec 30, 2021 03:34

SubG: Aug 19, 2004; It's a hard world for little things.

cryptobros either a) don't know who e.g. equinix are or what they do, or b) think that you can replace them with something like a mesh network of home routers. the crypto angle is that all of the home routers are going to ~*magic iot nonsense*~ with each other using bitcoin microtransactions, and that's going to handle global internet routing

that's not how any of that actually works, either in general or in detail: it isn't how any individual one of those things works in isolation, it's not how any given two of those things work in concert, and it's not how any of those things would work together as a whole. but that's the crypto catechism about free internet

# ? Dec 30, 2021 03:59

Boxturret: Oct 3, 2013; Don't ask me about Sonic the Hedgehog diaper fetish

infernal machines posted:

you'd almost get the impression the people raving about this "technology" have never seen a distributed database before

they literally think that any F.I.A.T. money transfer directly involves an armoured car driving from bank to bank, you expect them to know what a database is?

# ? Dec 30, 2021 04:03

infernal machines: Oct 11, 2012; we monitor many frequencies. we listen always. came a voice, out of the babel of tongues, speaking to us. it played us a mighty dub.

SubG posted:

that's not how any of that actually works, either in general or in detail: it isn't how any individual one of those things works in isolation, it's not how any given two of those things work in concert, and it's not how any of those things would work together as a whole. but that's the crypto catechism about free internet

which is i think what is so obnoxious about being condescended to by these loving idiots for not "understanding the technology"

# ? Dec 30, 2021 04:08

infernal machines: Oct 11, 2012; we monitor many frequencies. we listen always. came a voice, out of the babel of tongues, speaking to us. it played us a mighty dub.

if we just ignore how the technology demonstrably works, and instead imagineer something that does everything we want, perfectly, even when what we want is mutually contradictory and logically impossible, then we can say that's the future of blockchain

# ? Dec 30, 2021 04:12

qirex: Feb 15, 2001

blockchain is flying car technology: it maintains the disadvantages of both car and plane and introduces a bunch of compromises that make it worse at being both car and plane but *if we could just change a few laws of physics, cancel all aviation regulations and improve the way humans process sensory input and behave it could be awesome*

# ? Dec 30, 2021 04:19

infernal machines: Oct 11, 2012; we monitor many frequencies. we listen always. came a voice, out of the babel of tongues, speaking to us. it played us a mighty dub.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vzm6pvHPSGo

# ? Dec 30, 2021 04:20

qirex: Feb 15, 2001

lol lotus
*prepares for inbound shaggaring*

# ? Dec 30, 2021 04:27

SubG: Aug 19, 2004; It's a hard world for little things.

qirex posted:

blockchain is flying car technology: it maintains the disadvantages of both car and plane and introduces a bunch of compromises that make it worse at being both car and plane but *if we could just change a few laws of physics, cancel all aviation regulations and improve the way humans process sensory input and behave it could be awesome*

it's like you read some listoid thing that says that if you laid the veins, arteries, and capillaries in the average human body end to end they'd reach to the moon and elsewhere it says that you could put an infinite number of people on a boat if you get them to jump with precisely the right timing, and you conclude that if you time it right you can jump up and down on a boat until it goes to the moon

# ? Dec 30, 2021 04:29

Midjack: Dec 24, 2007

they finally sold off the corpse of lotus a couple of years ago.

# ? Dec 30, 2021 04:29

infernal machines: Oct 11, 2012; we monitor many frequencies. we listen always. came a voice, out of the babel of tongues, speaking to us. it played us a mighty dub.

SubG posted:

it's like you read some listoid thing that says that if you laid the veins, arteries, and capillaries in the average human body end to end they'd reach to the moon and elsewhere it says that you could put an infinite number of people on a boat if you get them to jump with precisely the right timing, and you conclude that if you time it right you can jump up and down on a boat until it goes to the moon

then you just keep repeating that complete misunderstanding over and over again, so that idiots who write for the tech press pick it up and run with it, and given enough uncritical press and repetition eventually everyone knows it's true

# ? Dec 30, 2021 04:34

njsykora: Jan 23, 2012; Robots confuse squirrels.

qirex posted:

blockchain is flying car technology: it maintains the disadvantages of both car and plane and introduces a bunch of compromises that make it worse at being both car and plane but *if we could just change a few laws of physics, cancel all aviation regulations and improve the way humans process sensory input and behave it could be awesome*

and just like the flying car a bunch of people realise they can make a lot of money for nothing by not telling the boss how the idea is never going to work

# ? Dec 30, 2021 04:43

Anticheese: Feb 13, 2008; $60,000,000 sexbot

Mt. Grokx

# ? Dec 30, 2021 05:04

Khorne: May 1, 2002

someone pulled that "it has so much potential" poo poo on me with nfts. For some reason I thought: in the 1960s links to external resources on a public ledger would have been revolutionary but we've since invented the internet and the entire modern computing ecosystem.

Boxturret posted:

people who don't like bitcoin just don't understand it, they should do more research to really "grock" it. i did and learned that bitcoin is anonymous, has low fees, is green, fast, cheap, and will always go up in value while also being completely stable against the dollar

this is the most frustrating part of the current wave of mainstream crypto enthusiasts

it is everything, it "has so much potential", "you just don't see the potential", "it's the future", "leave your ego behind", "it's bringing green energy", "it uses less power than [whatever industry]" bat flies out of their ear after roosting in their cavernous skull

The worst part is if you look even the tiniest bit into it and don't just huff hype none of this is true.

Khorne fucked around with this message at 07:33 on Dec 30, 2021

# ? Dec 30, 2021 07:21

Boxturret: Oct 3, 2013; Don't ask me about Sonic the Hedgehog diaper fetish

i'd say anyone who says that they read the white paper and had their mind blown and that it completely changed their out look on life, the universe, and everything is just flat out lying. It's 8 pages plus a half a page of references and the bulk of it is just explaining the math involved

# ? Dec 30, 2021 07:29

SubG: Aug 19, 2004; It's a hard world for little things.

pythagorean theorem: if a and b are the lengths of two sides of a right triangle and c is the length of the hypotenuse then a² + b² = c²

chump: ooooh...so you're saying that if a is your life goals and b is your mental state then c is enlightenment. mind. blown.

# ? Dec 30, 2021 07:41

Zamujasa: Oct 27, 2010; Bread Liar

Khorne posted:

The worst part is if you look even the tiniest bit into it and don't just huff hype none of this is true.

if they simply believe hard enough it will come true

# ? Dec 30, 2021 07:43

Qtotonibudinibudet: Nov 7, 2011; Omich poluyobok, skazhi ty narkoman? ya prosto tozhe gde to tam zhivu, mogli by vmeste uyobyvat' narkotiki

SubG posted:

cryptobros either a) don't know who e.g. equinix are or what they do, or b) think that you can replace them with something like a mesh network of home routers. the crypto angle is that all of the home routers are going to ~*magic iot nonsense*~ with each other using bitcoin microtransactions, and that's going to handle global internet routing

that's not how any of that actually works, either in general or in detail: it isn't how any individual one of those things works in isolation, it's not how any given two of those things work in concert, and it's not how any of those things would work together as a whole. but that's the crypto catechism about free internet

fond memories from when i was at cloudflare and one of the sales bros kramered in with a "yoooo how are we gonna compete with this new CDN ICO that'll have people serve content from their personal servers for butts" and got laughed out

# ? Dec 30, 2021 09:24

SubG: Aug 19, 2004; It's a hard world for little things.

the drake meme with "cdn ico" getting the hand and "web3" getting the smile

# ? Dec 30, 2021 12:42

ultrafilter: Aug 23, 2007; It's okay if you have any questions.

https://twitter.com/Theophite/status/1476476724212731905

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Serious Hardware/Software Crap > YOSPOS > buttcoin: all my apes gone

# ? Dec 30, 2021 14:57

jisforjosh: Jun 6, 2006; "It's J is for...you know what? Fuck it, jizz it is"

ultrafilter posted:

https://twitter.com/Theophite/status/1476476724212731905

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Serious Hardware/Software Crap > YOSPOS > buttcoin: all my apes gone

https://twitter.com/askeeve/status/1476489435470573572?t=-FhtIcIcs84YPeWJGfUO0Q&s=19

# ? Dec 30, 2021 15:01

Tweezer Reprise: Aug 6, 2013; It hasn't got six strings, but it's a lot of fun.

got bailed out instantly, lol. the system works

# ? Dec 30, 2021 15:01

njsykora: Jan 23, 2012; Robots confuse squirrels.

i saw someone suggest the talk of hacks has become another scam, where people are so into the idea of a 'community' that saying you got hacked and your [popular nft] stolen is a quick way to get rubes to send you money

# ? Dec 30, 2021 15:10

4lokos basilisk: Jul 17, 2008

all my apes (are) gone and my ETH is stole
i've been had - a mark on a winter's day
i'd be safu and hodl if i still had some DOGE
tweeting and cryin' on such a winter's day

# ? Dec 30, 2021 15:22

Powerful Two-Hander: Mar 10, 2004; Mods please change my name to "Tooter Skeleton" TIA.

lmao at the people telling him to take it down as his profile pic because "he doesn't own the ape anymore". Doesn't matter if they're winding him up or serious. It's funny either way.

# ? Dec 30, 2021 15:36

Shame Boy: Mar 2, 2010

lotta real good replies in that thread at least yeah

https://twitter.com/mondoretro1/status/1476498452234358788

# ? Dec 30, 2021 17:01

The_Franz: Aug 8, 2003

https://twitter.com/BootySloot/status/1476494817731379200?s=20

laffo

# ? Dec 30, 2021 18:17

Alan Smithee: Jan 4, 2005; A man becomes preeminent, he's expected to have enthusiasms.

Enthusiasms, enthusiasms...

the gently caress is wagmi

is it like maga but for crypto dorks

# ? Dec 30, 2021 18:19

Boxturret: Oct 3, 2013; Don't ask me about Sonic the Hedgehog diaper fetish

Alan Smithee posted:

the gently caress is wagmi

is it like maga but for crypto dorks

WAGMI is more than a token, it's a mantra uttered by frens, apes, and degenerates worldwide. It's about manifesting your wildest crypto gains into reality. Frens..,WAGMI is everlasting. WAGMI is here to shake up the meme-coin space, combining viral trends with rock solid project development.

# ? Dec 30, 2021 18:24

Boxturret: Oct 3, 2013; Don't ask me about Sonic the Hedgehog diaper fetish

WGMI is an NFT collectors club and fungible SPL token that lives on the Solana blockchain. The token represents proof of membership in the WGMI club. WGMI CC is inspired by community uplifting. Holders of the WGMI token receive regular airdrops of generative NFTs right to their wallets.

# ? Dec 30, 2021 18:25