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Yeah, can I get my mail forwarded to a temporary address for a week? My uh... job... has taken me to a remote location. It's the abandoned Carnival, the one by route 8. No, you're thinking of the one with the big clown statue. I'm at the one with the big Alice in Wonderland statue. Yup, that's the one. Right next to the abandoned ice cream factory and the headquarters of the company that only makes playing cards.
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Jan 19, 2022 20:03
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Prof. Crocodile posted:Really sucks working outside so often in a city where it rains like 95% of the time. must have a hell of a drainage system! which is pretty surprising based on the sorry state of the subway, huh. and how it's always night time here, right. anyone else noticed that? i mean... that ain't natural... don't you think?
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Jan 19, 2022 20:12
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Bane's not doin so good these days. His T levels are lowering and he's on all kinda supplements and crap. Whatever Joe Rogan is promoting. He can't even work up a rage to suplex any of us no more.
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Jan 19, 2022 20:14
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Play posted:must have a hell of a drainage system! which is pretty surprising based on the sorry state of the subway, huh. I jus figured it was...kinda moody? Y'know? Set the 'am-bee-ants'. Like NYC, set in Seattle, with extra rain, with the light of being in anchorage. Dat sorta ting. Youz tellin me it ain't like dat over in Sunnyvale?
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Jan 19, 2022 20:17
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I gots enough saved up to quit this sorry gig, I'm movin' outta Gotham for good. I've already got a hench gig set up in my new neighborhood, I can't imagine they got someone as bad as da Bat over in Metropolis
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Jan 19, 2022 20:26
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The batman was kicking our rear end the other day and he was holding a half-eaten sandwich while he did. Son of a bitch didn't even pause his lunch break. Do you know what it's like getting your wrist broke by a guy in a batsuit yelling and growling at you with a mouthful of tuna fish? That poo poo's scarier than anything Scarecrow ever did.
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Jan 19, 2022 21:01
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I know the money's a lot better here, but I think I'm going to move over to Ivy Town. My spine hurts when it rains now and at least I know the freakin' Atom's not gonna bash my head in with a 2x4 and hang me from a gargoyle. Plus I am so goddamn sick and tired of that Bruce Wayne rear end in a top hat always being on TV flaunting his money around. This city sucks.
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Jan 19, 2022 21:12
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Ha ha ha. You know that new guy, Ronnie? Just moved here from Ohio? A few minutes ago he comes up to me ranting because his first paycheck was just an envelope full of Monopoly money. He asked where the boss was and said he's gonna "tell that clown bastard to shove that fake money up his rear end." Let's go watch, this should be fun!
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Jan 19, 2022 23:22
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Yup, that's kinda what I thought would happen. "Hey Ronnie, why ya walkin' like that?"
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Jan 19, 2022 23:23
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bossy lady posted:The riddler jerked me off last night That's odd coincidence. I accidentally passed the Riddler Henchperson Aptitude Test by telling the Riddler he sucked his own dick. It wasn't the answer he was looking for to the riddle, but after some deliberation I guess he accepted it as an alternate answer based on the situation.
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Jan 20, 2022 08:23
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Colonel Cancer posted:Gay Ghost sends his regards This Gray Ghost reboot is gettin weird. A Fancy Hat posted:Did uh... did Firefly just rub his nipples when he started that fire? Yeah, I uh, got bad news for you buddy. They're all sex perverts.
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Jan 20, 2022 15:14
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You know what? I had a ventriloquist dummy yell at me and threaten to "fill me fulla lead". Batman threw a batarang and ruined my favorite shirt. Robin popped up in front of me and scared me so bad I pissed myself. And then I twisted my ankle trying to jump from rooftop to rooftop while blinded from a flash grenade that Batman threw in my face. But, all things considered? Not the worst job. At least I don't have to piss in a bottle to make productivity numbers.
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Jan 20, 2022 17:31
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A Fancy Hat posted:But, all things considered? Not the worst job. At least I don't have to piss in a bottle to make productivity numbers. If this is a dealbreaker for you, then I'm gonna say right off the bat that you're not gonna want to work for Piss Man.
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Jan 20, 2022 18:03
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No, heist is h-e-i-s-t. Yeah. E-i. No, I know... "I before E," but that doesn't really work anyway. There are a bunch of exceptions: sleigh, weigh, weight, uh, inveigle. it means... it's kind of a villain word, I guess, yeah? it means to sort of flatter your way into something. anyway, h-e-i.
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Jan 21, 2022 19:17
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Well, I feel lucky This accounting job at Ace chemical pays pretty well. I even have a skylight right over my desk. It's no corner office, but I at least see the sun.
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Jan 21, 2022 19:24
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Boss says to restock the hideout kitchen, but it's 3am and where the gently caress am I going to find clown themed paper plates at this hour? loving goons forgot to buy groceries, but do they forget to restock the clown gas? Nope. It's tempting to buy regular paper plates and watch the boss lose his poo poo after a rough night with the bat.
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Jan 21, 2022 20:28
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Well, the cat’s out of the bag; I’m gonna make some scratch - working with Catwoman! ... Whaddaya mean, “only she gets to make the puns”? Well, what’s the fuckin’ point, then? Meow.
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Jan 21, 2022 21:20
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So what if Lonzo fell into a vat of acid or Bull got eaten by hyenas? Joker said I'd get a cool ten grand if I stand here and press this button once the Batman shows up. It beats working for Penguin. Cobblepot smells like cheap cigars and fish farts.
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Jan 21, 2022 21:56
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I'm going to become the Jacker. That's right, I'm starting a small business giving handjobs to villains. I think I might even offer package deals for their henchmen, if I can lock down a good insurance package. I'm worried about RSI.
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Jan 22, 2022 10:10
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Sourdough Sam posted:Bane's not doin so good these days. His T levels are lowering and he's on all kinda supplements and crap. Whatever Joe Rogan is promoting. He can't even work up a rage to suplex any of us no more. Yeah, sorry, that was me. I did all the Venom. Got into a whole thing. The Justice League got me in a zero gravity cell now til it wears off, but they let me have my phone. Slayerjerman posted:Boss says to restock the hideout kitchen, but it's 3am and where the gently caress am I going to find clown themed paper plates at this hour? loving goons forgot to buy groceries, but do they forget to restock the clown gas? Nope. Friend, let me introduce you to the wonders of the 24 hour party supply store. They make bank on this city. Or you could just, y'know, break into a place.
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Jan 22, 2022 11:01
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I got arrested once in a party supply store. Spent about an hour filling up helium clown balloons, never realized there was a silent alarm. I guess they got tired of all their rubber chickens and clacking teeth going missing all the time. Really, that was probably my most embarrassing fall.
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Jan 22, 2022 17:00
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Of course he's Wayne, you numbskulls. Guy's a fuckin' Dracula - lives in a castle, over on Bat Mountain.
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Jan 22, 2022 17:09
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Weka posted:I'm going to become the Jacker. That's right, I'm starting a small business giving handjobs to villains. I think I might even offer package deals for their henchmen, if I can lock down a good insurance package. I'm worried about RSI. That name's already taken, don't gently caress with the Jacker. He was run over by a radioactive criminally insane power jack and gained its powers.
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Jan 22, 2022 18:07
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man scarecrow took that line from macheavelli about how it's better to be fearerd than loved to heart
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Jan 22, 2022 18:27
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the only way anyone is afraid of scarecrow is if he drugs them first.
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Jan 22, 2022 18:34
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That b*tch catwoman is lurking around...when i get my hands on that b*tch i'm gonna make her regret being such a b*tch...b*tch b*tch b*tch...
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Jan 22, 2022 18:34
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SuperMechagodzilla posted:Of course he's Wayne, you numbskulls. Guy's a fuckin' Dracula - lives in a castle, over on Bat Mountain. Speaking of which is Dracula looking for any goons? That could be fun.
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Jan 22, 2022 18:42
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RBA Starblade posted:Speaking of which is Dracula looking for any goons? That could be fun. Do you like eating spiders?
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Jan 22, 2022 18:44
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*writes up effort post on r/antiwork about tweedledum and tweedledee threatening to fire anyone who calls in due to covid or who doesn't vote for trump*
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Jan 22, 2022 18:45
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working for maxi zeus used to be alright but the last time he got sent to arkham he discovered religion and got real weird
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Jan 22, 2022 19:10
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Xenocides posted:Do you like eating spiders? [mugs to camera, tongue swollen] "It'th a lithing."
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Jan 22, 2022 19:27
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gimme the GOD drat candy posted:the only way anyone is afraid of scarecrow is if he drugs them first. Hey like some of us may suffer from Formidophobia. Like not me of course. I am big tough thug and all, but like yeah some people may suffer form that for very legitimate reason, and we should respect that being scared of scarecrows is a very understandable thing for someone to be scared of. LIKE SCARE. IT'S IN THE loving NAME. loving CREPPY LOOKING FUCKS. but, um yeah. I'm all good with that stuff. Anyway I'm doing some work with the penguin. I like penguins. Always look so friendly and happy.
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Jan 22, 2022 19:44
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Flinger posted:That b*tch catwoman is lurking around...when i get my hands on that b*tch i'm gonna make her regret being such a b*tch...b*tch b*tch b*tch... Found the goon from the arkham games.
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Jan 22, 2022 19:55
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Yeah, guns are useful, but I think I'm going to try to take the bat with a fist fight.
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Jan 22, 2022 19:58
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ikanreed posted:Yeah, guns are useful, but I think I'm going to try to take the bat with a fist fight. this guy gets it
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Jan 22, 2022 20:00
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*gets beaten up by an 11 year old child in bright red clothing*
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Jan 22, 2022 20:12
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ikanreed posted:*gets beaten up by an 11 year old child in bright red clothing* *again*
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Jan 22, 2022 21:51
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My t4 is just hahahahaha written on a balloon. Thanks Joker no tax refund for me this year.
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Jan 22, 2022 22:33
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So there we were, 12,000ft about to perform the most idiotic aerial manuver ever to grapple this CIA plane to fake a death and capture like, I dunno, the only scientist that can carry out our boss'-bosses plan. Whom by the way we've never seen or met, but boss says is really some broad... Anyway, boss leans in and says something, of course we've got the back of the plane wide open, it's loud as gently caress and he's got some luchadoure mask fetish so he's mumbling through the drat thing like some Scottish Darth Vader... Well, I nod and give thumbs up, no clue what he said, but apparently he didn't like my response, so he grabs me and loving literally breaks my loving spine. So here I am on the floor of this cargo plane without medical care until it lands in whatever lovely country. TLDR, don't hench for Bane, if you don't want a broken spine and mountains of medical debt. Because that's how you end up stuck in Gotham General for the rest of your miserable existence.
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Jan 22, 2022 23:03
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| # ? Jun 1, 2024 15:59 |
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you hear something?
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Jan 22, 2022 23:03
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