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Maybe you could prevent employees from leaving by paying them more, but then a lawyer wouldn't make any money from you suing the employees, which is obviously the bigger tragedy here. 
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Jan 23, 2022 04:57
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Encourage employees to lie about their Covid safety status and then get annoyed when they're honest instead.
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Jan 23, 2022 16:37
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Just like, go to the old job but be super clumsy, especially around managers. When they call you into their office to ask what is going on, trip and fall onto their desk and knock all their poo poo over. Never have your own pens and ask others to borrow theirs when you need one and just keep dropping it on the ground. Eat taco bell for lunch every day and cropdust managers. Just be a useless nuisance until they fire you and let you either go to your new job or go on unemployment until the legal crap is sorted out. Alternatively, put on a fake mustache and apply for your old job with a fake name. After they hire the fake you, the real you is now legally cleared to work at the new job.
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Jan 24, 2022 16:47
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Outrail posted:Lmao, they actually tried to negotiate back in December. The hospital told them to gently caress off, didn't do anything to retain or try to recruit replacements instead opting to force citizen employees to work. Feels like this is the bit where employers wander up to the 'actual slavery' line and give it a nudge. First thing I'd have brought up was the money aspect - they don't want to negotiate more money for people, yet somehow want those same people to train replacements (that they're obviously not looking for). If they can't even pay their current staff decent $, where are they gonna find more to pay the additional trainees? Also nthing the idea of "show up, hide out, do gently caress all" & watch the collapse in real-time, because gently caress Thedacare.
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Jan 24, 2022 18:32
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MegaCorp has generous leave policy, no complaints there. But they outsourced being paid while on leave to a clunky 3rd party company with a nearly unusable app. Fools may believe they have all their medical paperwork submitted because the app says “100% of documents received, you’re all set!” then get a fun threatening email about an overdue form noting that failing to submit that promptly could lead to termination. Getting paid by the company is so delayed that before employees go on leave they’re advised to have significant savings as you may not get paid anything until you’ve been back for a few weeks.
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Jan 24, 2022 22:47
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You do understand that everything is working exactly as intended, right?
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Jan 24, 2022 22:52
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evilpicard posted:good luck with that
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Jan 24, 2022 23:16
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InsertPotPun posted:slimy motherfucker. "the cab was safe" as if the 40 foot loving trailer with no brakes wouldn't have been an issue. loving ghoul. I'm guessing you could take that ruling (the employee's only options were sitting in the cab and die, or do something impossible), and get OHS on their rear end, as they very specifically demanded the employee put himself in danger. It probably wouldn't be worth it tho.
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Jan 24, 2022 23:22
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Hieronymous Alloy posted:show's over, judge got sane: Turns out ThedaCare could, is and will be putting together an alternative to losing the team. I hope they lose more employees
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Jan 25, 2022 00:29
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Outrail posted:Turns out ThedaCare could, is and will be putting together an alternative to losing the team. I hope they lose more employees Ironically, by calling this much attention to how much better a competitor is willing to treat their employees, they’ve made it far more likely. I think a lot of employers are being refamiliarized with the part of the grift about making it appear the grass isn’t greener.
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Jan 25, 2022 02:01
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Blue Moonlight posted:Ironically, by calling this much attention to how much better a competitor is willing to treat their employees, they’ve made it far more likely. A lawyer (copyright but still) goes into the details: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=deWa_Tligo8
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Jan 25, 2022 05:46
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ThedaCare? More like They Don't Care! 
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Jan 25, 2022 15:19
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So.TotalLossBrain posted:loving same. Accepted a job offer that's effectively a 2-level promotion with 54% more pay. Told my supervisor about it and he seemed super surprised at this, even though I had made myself clear when this lovely raise came through that I'd be looking for other opportunities elsewhere. In a way I hate to leave this job because it's super chill, I love what I do, and I loved everyone I worked with. But this is a big step up and I am moving away from this poo poo hole to the Pdx area, a move I've been looking to make for a long time. Yeah yeah I know Portland has its own set of problems The downside is that I have to do loads of work to get this house ready to sell and I need to get another in Portland. Great time to sell I guess, but not great to buy. The last time I moved was 12 years ago and I'm not looking forward to that logistics nightmare. TotalLossBrain fucked around with this message at 04:49 on Jan 26, 2022 |
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Jan 26, 2022 04:44
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TotalLossBrain posted:So. Congrats! 
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Jan 26, 2022 05:10
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TotalLossBrain posted:So. Congratulations!
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Jan 26, 2022 05:35
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Not a personal story, but a poem from the product description of this dress:quote:When I open my eyes every morning, I think about 500 reasons to ask for leave. I think the model just about sums it up: 
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Jan 26, 2022 06:14
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Smik posted:A lawyer (copyright but still) goes into the details: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=deWa_Tligo8 Was hesitant about starting an hour long legalese video, but gat drat  You can always tell when a lawyer is well and truly pissed off because they drop a lot of the formal verbiage and just start lighting fuckers on fire 
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Jan 26, 2022 06:43
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Karia posted:Not a personal story, but a poem from the product description of this dress: Is... is that an Excel dress?!
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Jan 26, 2022 07:49
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Agents are GO! posted:Is... is that an Excel dress?! Why, would you like to pivot my tables? 
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Jan 26, 2022 13:37
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Ichabod Sexbeast posted:Why, would you like to pivot my tables? I'll help you with a vlookup!
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Jan 26, 2022 13:58
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Takes No Damage posted:Was hesitant about starting an hour long legalese video, but gat drat Leonard is OK but his videos are so long because a lot of it is him just reading the paperwork aloud. Good for background noise, but I'm more interested in analysis, not an audio book of a motion.
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Jan 26, 2022 14:28
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TotalLossBrain posted:So. Grats! 
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Jan 26, 2022 14:31
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Steakandchips posted:I'll help you with a vlookup! Vlookup is for #metoo pervs, true alphas use xlookup.
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Jan 26, 2022 16:48
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Scientastic posted:Vlookup is for #metoo pervs, true alphas use xlookup. Literally used xlookup properly yesterday. Way better than vlookup. Now I don't have to count the column I need output! I can just select it! MAGIC! The ifnull clause is excellent too, I can just add "Not Found" as an ifnull value in the formula itself!
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Jan 26, 2022 17:19
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Sad to say, but xlookup literally changed my life, I love it.
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Jan 26, 2022 18:03
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Scientastic posted:Sad to say, but xlookup literally changed my life, I love it. It's so good.
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Jan 26, 2022 18:09
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I use VLOOKUP and have never heard of XLOOKUP. Time to google. EDIT: I'm not on 365. Sucks to be me. It doesn't exist in my copy of excel.
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Jan 26, 2022 20:40
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Steakandchips posted:Literally used xlookup properly yesterday. Way better than vlookup. Now I don't have to count the column I need output! I can just select it! MAGIC! The ifnull clause is excellent too, I can just add "Not Found" as an ifnull value in the formula itself! Iferror also works iferror((Vlookup shithere),"notFound")
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Jan 26, 2022 20:57
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tater_salad posted:Iferror also works Indeed, but who is going to bother with that extra functioning and bracketing when it's all right there for the easy taking in xlookup... BitBasher posted:I use VLOOKUP and have never heard of XLOOKUP. Time to google. ah, right, this guy might^^^
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Jan 26, 2022 21:20
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Ichabod Sexbeast posted:Why, would you like to pivot my tables? I’ll average your ifs 
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Jan 26, 2022 21:39
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HenryJLittlefinger posted:I’ll average your ifs Baby let's XHOOKUP
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Jan 26, 2022 22:23
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Links in this workbook are enabled <3
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Jan 26, 2022 23:39
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Ichabod Sexbeast posted:Baby let's XHOOKUP You and me baby ain't nothin' but Pivot Tables So let's automatically sort data in one place and present the information you're analyzing in another
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Jan 27, 2022 00:03
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I'm a Power Pivot.
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Jan 27, 2022 00:26
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You know, LibreOffice is almost as good as HEY WAIT COME BACK, WHAT DID I SAY
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Jan 27, 2022 00:39
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~Coxy posted:I'm a Power Pivot. Is the Pivot generating all the power?
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Jan 27, 2022 00:39
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Powered Descent posted:You know, LibreOffice is almost as good as HEY WAIT COME BACK, WHAT DID I SAY lol!
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Jan 27, 2022 01:04
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Jan 27, 2022 01:43
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Excel horny in the work thread. I like it.
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Jan 27, 2022 01:46
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| # ? Jun 1, 2024 19:29 |
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This week I learned that our payroll software doesn't have any way to mark certain pay codes as unemployment exempt. The head accountant's workaround is to temporarily mark certain pay codes as nontax because it's the only way to print the annual reports he needs, and then fix it. When I ran payroll and imported timesheets, there were a ton of errors. I added those employees hours manually, because I didn't want to waste time troubleshooting this horseshit software when it was just as likely to be my hacky Excel sheet being fucky. The accountant saw that a bunch of people had nontax hours and realized he had not fixed the pay codes. So he fixed the pay codes. Making their hours disappear from being paid out, but not from the system. So I had to go in and manually add their hours again, and then delete the incorrect version of their hours that I had manually added earlier, which looked completely indistinct from the new hours I just added. It doesn't actually tell you in the entry interface whether hours are taxable or not, that is a fun surprise you wait to learn until you have printed a summary report. Also every time I made an edit there was a random chance the first employee would be deleted. That particular issue is ongoing. I would love that Excel dress but alas, I am fat as hell and I can tell that ain't happening.
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Jan 27, 2022 02:24
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