r/relationships: I have nothing against this baby.

The Something Awful Forums > Main > General Bullshit > r/relationships: I have nothing against this baby.

Kurieg: Jul 19, 2012; RIP Lutri: 5/19/20-4/2/20

Metis of the Hallways posted:

AITA for �threatening� my new neighbors with my dog?

"I was just trying to make sure she lived here by asking invasive questions and trying to steal her address. Honestly she should be thanking me."

# ? Jan 31, 2022 03:59

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# ? May 31, 2024 03:55

Brawnfire: Jul 13, 2004; 🎧Listen to Cylindricule!🎵
https://linktr.ee/Cylindricule

Oh haha hey lost my keys oh jeez anyways do you live here like, could you run to your house from here ahahaha wow where's that airpod I lost drat hey your dog won't attack me if I grab you or it right

# ? Jan 31, 2022 04:05

Murderion: Oct 4, 2009; 2019. New York is in ruins. The global economy is spiralling. Cyborgs rule over poisoned wastes.

The only time that's left is
FUN TIME

Midnight Voyager posted:

There's something just especially dehumanizing about calling pretty women "decorative." Like that's their only purpose.

It just makes me think they're dressing up as home ornaments. Like "Joyce came up to me wearing that ceramic swan outfit of hers, she knows just how to push my buttons."

# ? Jan 31, 2022 04:17

Uncle Enzo: Apr 28, 2008; I always wanted to be a Wizard

Metis of the Hallways posted:

AITA for “threatening” my new neighbors with my dog?

When I saw Personal Protective Dog I was not inclined to be on her side. But holy poo poo, blocking a woman's path at night and yammering obvious bullshit and then grabbing at her dogs leash? That's straight up attacker behavior. Her dog growled? Good boy. She would have been justified pulling a gun, or pepper spraying him.

Which is what she should do if this motherfucker ever approaches her again. And call the cops and tell them she just got assaulted. That dudes sense of entitlement has extended to accosting women at night, he's an active hazard and she'd do the world a favor to remove him.

# ? Jan 31, 2022 04:31

Blastedhellscape: Jan 1, 2008

Soylent Pudding posted:

In the absence of meat, bite the hand that literally feeds.

AITA for 'starving' and 'poisoning' my friend's kids?

Losing your poo poo and ruining your sweet babysitting deal, all because your kids discovered they like cumin and turmeric.

# ? Jan 31, 2022 04:33

Cobalt-60: Oct 11, 2016; by Azathoth

Soylent Pudding posted:

In the absence of meat, bite the hand that literally feeds.

AITA for 'starving' and 'poisoning' my friend's kids?

That's gnawing on the collarbone.

# ? Jan 31, 2022 04:47

Grape: Nov 16, 2017; Happily shilling for China!

Murderion posted:

It just makes me think they're dressing up as home ornaments. Like "Joyce came up to me wearing that ceramic swan outfit of hers, she knows just how to push my buttons."

Another grinding day at the office working in my cubicle across from Bjork and Lady Gaga.

# ? Jan 31, 2022 04:48

Mx.: Dec 16, 2006; I'm a great fan! When I watch TV I'm always saying "That's political correctness gone mad!"
Why thankyew!

AITA for dropping my freeloading brother off at our aunt's house after she called and scolded me for evicting him?

quote:

My older brother (OB) is... a bit of a bum. It's mean to say but it's true. He can never hang onto a job for longer than a couple years max and when he inevitably loses whatever job he had he starts mooching off family and friends until he can find another job months later. This entails him freeloading at their place, eating their food, using their stuff, etc. He's lost friends because of how long he bummed off of them and I don't blame them for cutting him off.

Well this last time he lost his job he went to our parents but they didn't have room because they were letting our eldest brother's (EB) family stay with them after he and SIL lost their jobs out of nowhere within the same month (EB's entire crew was laid off with zero warning and SIL's work burned down) and they couldn't afford the home they were renting anymore. So OB was pretty much SOL. So our parents, aunt, and uncle all started calling me asking if I'd take him in just long enough so he could get on his feet again.

I (stupidly) let myself feel bad for him and said okay, but he only had a few months to get another job or he was out on the street. They all said of course, of course and so he came to stay with me. And it was a nightmare. He's a slob. He NEVER washes dishes, never washes his clothes, and eats pretty much whatever he wants. I guess since I'm his little sister he figured he could ignore me saying to get his poo poo together. Well after 6 months I told him he had to go. And gave him a couple weeks to find somewhere else.

Well it seems he called our parents and cried about me kicking him out and they told him he knew he couldn't stay forever but they also ofc called my aunts/uncle and told them all about it. And my busybody aunt called me and scolded me for "being cruel to my brother" and "abandoning family when they need help". I let her talk and finally said she was right, helping family was important and I'm glad she showed me that. She seemed glad I "understood the right thing to do" before hanging up. So I followed her advice and packed my bro up and drove him to her house. I couldn't take care of him anymore (he was running all my bills up) but my aunt made a good point, family should help each other.

So I dropped him off there (she has room since all her kids moved out) and then left. But I wasn't even halfway home before I was getting multiple calls from my parents and aunt. Parents were demanding to know why our aunt was blowing up their phones and aunt was leaving voicemails shouting at me to come back and get my brother. I explained to my parents and they said it was a good idea since aunt sounded like she wanted to help but my aunt called me an rear end in a top hat and said she didn't want my brother there. And when I told her family helps each other she called me a oval office. Last I checked he's still living with her. AITA?

# ? Jan 31, 2022 04:56

the holy poopacy: May 16, 2009; hey! check this out; Fun Shoe

Mx. posted:

AITA for dropping my freeloading brother off at our aunt's house after she called and scolded me for evicting him?

i have never wanted a story to be true more than this one

# ? Jan 31, 2022 05:04

Tarkus: Aug 27, 2000

Mx. posted:

AITA for dropping my freeloading brother off at our aunt's house after she called and scolded me for evicting him?

Nrrrrgh! right into my veins!

# ? Jan 31, 2022 05:04

Nae: Sep 3, 2020; what.

Mx. posted:

AITA for dropping my freeloading brother off at our aunt's house after she called and scolded me for evicting him?

love that this grown-rear end man can be traded around like an old tupperware container

# ? Jan 31, 2022 05:05

Invisible Clergy: Sep 25, 2015; "Behold, I will corrupt your seed, and spread dung upon your faces"

Malachi 2:3

Nae posted:

love that this grown-rear end man can be traded around like an old tupperware container

What do you with trash you don't want anymore?

AITA for calling Ann Bolelyn a filthy gold digger?

quote:

My friends and I love to dicuss British history, specifically the Tudors.

Over dinner today, we had our favourite topic of discussion, that of Henry VIII and his wives.

Today, I specifically brought up the point that Ann boleyn was a gold digger. That she worked her way into Henry's pants purely because she wanted to be queen. She didn't give a poo poo about him.

She then continued to sleep around while Henry was running a country.

I, ultimately, said she deserved to be executed. While she was not executed for the reasons she should have been. I felt that it was wrong she was gold digging and diving into English coffers. I also believed she was committing treason.

My friend absolutely loves Anne boleyn and started screaming at me for insulting Anne. She stormed off.

I did give Anne boleyn praise for being the trigger point of change in England, though by way of the church of England. While I am not religious, it is fair to say that the CofE was a big drat deal.

AITA? I was just stating the situation from my eyes. I was respectful of everybody's views.

Invisible Clergy fucked around with this message at 05:11 on Jan 31, 2022

# ? Jan 31, 2022 05:08

Seth Pecksniff: May 27, 2004; can't believe shrek is fucking dead. rip to a real one.

Mx. posted:

AITA for dropping my freeloading brother off at our aunt's house after she called and scolded me for evicting him?

It's so beautiful....

# ? Jan 31, 2022 05:11

reignonyourparade: Nov 15, 2012

Mx. posted:

AITA for dropping my freeloading brother off at our aunt's house after she called and scolded me for evicting him?
... Last I checked he's still living with her. AITA?

incredible

# ? Jan 31, 2022 05:16

wizardofloneliness: Dec 30, 2008

Invisible Clergy posted:

AITA for calling Ann Bolelyn a filthy gold digger?

I'm glad these people found each other.

# ? Jan 31, 2022 05:17

Cloacamazing!: Apr 18, 2018; Too cute to be evil

Invisible Clergy posted:

What do you with trash you don't want anymore?

AITA for calling Ann Bolelyn a filthy gold digger?

"It's no big deal, I just said she deserved to be executed for marrying a rich guy and sleeping around, why do you people keep getting mad at me?"

# ? Jan 31, 2022 05:18

Absurd Alhazred: Mar 27, 2010; by Athanatos

Mx. posted:

AITA for dropping my freeloading brother off at our aunt's house after she called and scolded me for evicting him?

# ? Jan 31, 2022 05:24

Megillah Gorilla: Sep 22, 2003; If only all of life's problems could be solved by smoking a professor of ancient evil texts.; Bread Liar

Invisible Clergy posted:

What do you with trash you don't want anymore?

AITA for calling Ann Bolelyn a filthy gold digger?

Incoming Pitt the Elder barfight.

# ? Jan 31, 2022 05:28

GI_Clutch: Aug 22, 2000; by Fluffdaddy; Dinosaur Gum

Invisible Clergy posted:

AITA for calling Ann Bolelyn a filthy gold digger?

If this were early SA, I think I'd be posting that image macro of Ogre yelling "NEEEEEERRRDDDSS!"

# ? Jan 31, 2022 05:33

Flared Basic Bitch: Feb 22, 2005; Invading your personal space since 1968.

Soylent Pudding posted:

AITA for 'starving' and 'poisoning' my friend's kids?

My heart�s desire is to be responsible for children of parents that accuse me of child abuse.

# ? Jan 31, 2022 05:34

speng31b: May 8, 2010

Uncle Enzo posted:

When I saw Personal Protective Dog I was not inclined to be on her side. But holy poo poo, blocking a woman's path at night and yammering obvious bullshit and then grabbing at her dogs leash? That's straight up attacker behavior. Her dog growled? Good boy. She would have been justified pulling a gun, or pepper spraying him.

Which is what she should do if this motherfucker ever approaches her again. And call the cops and tell them she just got assaulted. That dudes sense of entitlement has extended to accosting women at night, he's an active hazard and she'd do the world a favor to remove him.

Background: my wife and I own and train multiple German shepherds in dog sport type stuff.

I was skeptical at first, but the described behavior is objectively correct for a well trained working dog in that position. The dude is very lucky because most people who think they have protection dogs are just a nervous dangerous wreck, but that sounds like a good dog doing its job properly.

# ? Jan 31, 2022 05:45

Evil Willow: Apr 26, 2007; Bored now...

AITA for getting upset with my husband after he told me nothing will change while I am pregnant?

quote:

Throwaway account. So me (26f) and my husband (28m), who I'll call "Jake" for this story, have been together for 5 years and married for 3. We have recently started trying for a baby as we both felt like that was the next step in our life together, and 3 weeks ago I got a positive test back. We were really really happy and told our families, and now my mom and MIL want to throw a big baby shower for us, it was just super good news all around.

Well 2 nights ago me and Jake were getting ready for bed when he reminds me to go through the house and make sure all the lights are off. Now he can be a little lazy at times, and it has become a nightly routine for me to make sure all the lights are off that he leaves on before we go to bed. I wasn't feeling very well and asked if he could just do it since he wasn't doing anything and was literally standing by the door. He then tells me "No, this is what is expected of you every night." I was a little hurt but I didn't want to fight with him so I just did it. When I came back Jake goes on this very long and unprovoked rant saying things like "Just because you are pregnant does not mean anything will change" and "You are still expected to cook, clean, and do all the chores every day because how can you be expected to be a mother if you can't handle a little work." He wasn't yelling or anything, he was talking to me quietly like a was 2 inches tall.

I was shocked because I had never heard him say anything like this. The rant went on for about 30 minutes before I interjected and asked "Well what do you plan on doing to help me with all of this." He then got extremely defensive saying he works his rear end of at his job to provide for me and what is going to be our future children. (For context I don't work atm, my job was not paying enough to justify me going so I am a full time college student) He ended by saying that it doesn't matter how I feel physically or mentally, it is a mothers job to push through, and if he helped and babied me I wouldn't be a good mother.

I got extremely upset and started yelling and I said that "I wish I would've known this is how you felt before I got pregnant with your baby." There was a moment of silence before he started crying and he left for the night to stay at his mothers house. He hasn't been back yet and my MIL and SIL have called me berating me and saying I broke Jakes heart with what I said and I need to apologize immediately, and until I do he isn't coming home. I don't know how to feel.

So AITA for yelling at my husband after he said he isn't helping me with anything during the pregnancy because "its a mothers job to deal with it"?

EDIT: First I want to thank you all for your responses. I'm sorry I haven't really responded to anyone specifically but I really do appreciate you guys. A few of you asked if I told my MIL and SIL what he said, which I did. They basically said I was being sensitive and all he meant was pregnancy isn't an excuse to be lazy, he meant no harm. ......ok. I am getting some things together and am going to be headed to my mom and dads house. My mom is furious with him and doesn't want me apologizing to him or talking to him without the situation either being recorded or having a witness. Regardless, I am ok and will be ok. I do appreciate all of you though, you have opened my eyes to many things I may have been ignoring or looking past over the years.

# ? Jan 31, 2022 05:53

therobit: Aug 19, 2008; I've been tryin' to speak with you for a long time

Now I ain�t sayin� she�s a gold digger
But she ain�t messin� with no broke Seigneur.

# ? Jan 31, 2022 05:59

Megillah Gorilla: Sep 22, 2003; If only all of life's problems could be solved by smoking a professor of ancient evil texts.; Bread Liar

Evil Willow posted:

AITA for getting upset with my husband after he told me nothing will change while I am pregnant?

Husband is a thin-skinned piss baby.

Half hour rant at his pregnant wife because he's too loving lazy to turn off the lights. SMDH

# ? Jan 31, 2022 06:03

haveblue: Aug 15, 2005; Toilet Rascal

Go to turn off the lights and never return

# ? Jan 31, 2022 06:07

Invisible Clergy: Sep 25, 2015; "Behold, I will corrupt your seed, and spread dung upon your faces"

Malachi 2:3

Megillah Gorilla posted:

Incoming Pitt the Elder barfight.

LORD PALMERSTON!

Probably the first time a named character in one of these posts was actually decapitated, even if it wasn't by :guillotine:

AITA for washing my hair in the bathroom sink?

quote:

I (32M) don't shower daily (not very active, don't need to, etc), but my hair/face get greasy and I need to wash them daily. I've been washing my (short) hair in the bathroom sink, on a daily basis, since forever. It takes about 2 minutes to do and I can remain clothed. My wife and I have lived in the same place together for many years, and just recently it's started to be a problem for her that I wash my hair in the sink.

She doesn't like that I get "dirty shampoo water" (her words) on her hairbrushes that are right next to the sink, because she doesn't want to get it in her hair. Yes, some soapy residue accumulates on things over time in the bathroom near the sink area, but I'm pretty sure it's not just me causing it. Other things happen in the bathroom aside from my hair washing. She's convinced it's ONLY from me. FWIW, we rarely deep clean our bathroom.

She suggested I should get on all fours and wash my hair in the tub using the shower wand. I tried this in the past, but it sucks. I have to be fully nude or my clothes will get wet, it takes much longer, and it isn't pleasant on the back. I suggested she should just move her brushes to the other side of the counter so they won't be right next to the sink. She did that and then dramatically started moving EVERYTHING away from the sink and to the side of the counter, because apparently she can't handle soap residue getting on anything. In the bathroom. Where soap is used. I've been doing this for 8+ years.

We got in a dumb fight about it. She says my greasy hair is my own problem and I shouldn't make it hers. Plenty of her problems become my problems, and I put up with it without complaining. It seems to me like that's part of a relationship. Give and take. In the end, I didn't budge, and she left to go hang out with her friends and probably complain. Am I the rear end in a top hat here for not wanting to change my quick and easy daily hair washing routine?

Yeah, I bet this guy washes his hair "every day." :jerkbag:

No word yet on what method he uses to wash his rear end or how often he claims to do it, but the post is still pretty fresh, unlike OP.

# ? Jan 31, 2022 06:10

Evil Willow: Apr 26, 2007; Bored now...

Invisible Clergy posted:

AITA for washing my hair in the bathroom sink?

Yeah, I bet this guy washes his hair "every day."
No word yet on what method he uses to wash his rear end or how often he claims to do it, but the post is still pretty fresh, unlike OP.

If the dude's face and hair is getting greasy enough to need washing every day, then he really, really should be showering every day too. Gross.

# ? Jan 31, 2022 06:28

therobit: Aug 19, 2008; I've been tryin' to speak with you for a long time

Invisible Clergy posted:

LORD PALMERSTON!

Probably the first time a named character in one of these posts was actually decapitated, even if it wasn't by

AITA for washing my hair in the bathroom sink?
FWIW, we rarely deep clean our bathroom.

ESH. Clean, you filthy animals.

# ? Jan 31, 2022 06:51

Mx.: Dec 16, 2006; I'm a great fan! When I watch TV I'm always saying "That's political correctness gone mad!"
Why thankyew!

Did her prank went too far?

quote:

My best friend of 12 years, call me after work( I did 14 hrs that day). She call me crying and yelling. She said her boyfriend hit her. She hang up and don�t pick up. I call her boyfriend,the boyfriend pick up the phone and act crazy. I�m panicking, and trying to convinced her boyfriend to let her go home. After talking to him for a while he said okay and hang up. I call her phone, she don�t pick up. After 10 min, she call and said it was all a prank. I told her not to contact me and that I need a break from this friendship, I hang up. She text me and said that is not a big deal and she was only joking. Then said sorry. Her boyfriend text me and said it was all her idea. Is she alright mentally?

Edit: After reading some comment. I got worried and call her phone. I ask her if everything is fine. She was actually mad at me. Told me that I don�t known how to take a joke. That I should be happy that it was all a prank. That if the reason why I was not happy was because I really wish for her to be abused. I told her that is all I need to known, bye. She said okay bye. That�s is going to be the end of it. I done with her bullshit

Edit: she text me this later

Rape? Death ? Your the most exaggeration person I�ve ever met Your judgmental and ignorant How I�m in danger? It�s he wouldn�t do that If I was really in danger I would call 911 or maybe my parents not u It was a joke that I sow on YouTube and Instagram If u find out it�s a joke You should be relieved and say yeah it hosed up but thank god ur ok say don�t do that�s it

Look at you acting all that Like ur the most healthy adult person that doesn�t want to be involved in my toxic situation Grown rear end adult my rear end It�s a joke Have some humor and move on We don�t need to meet When u decide to stop acting like ur better then we can

Guys I�m done with her. My mental health go first. I can�t let her affect me this way.

p r a n k s

just hilarious japes for pals

# ? Jan 31, 2022 07:00

Barudak: May 7, 2007

Its too late, her next prank is gonna be framing you for murder

# ? Jan 31, 2022 07:02

deety: Aug 2, 2004; zombies + sharks = fun

Evil Willow posted:

AITA for getting upset with my husband after he told me nothing will change while I am pregnant?

Guys like this never seem to realize that if they aren't pitching in on chores or child care, then there isn't much reason to put up with their lovely behavior, especially for someone like OP who has another place to go.

The fact that he was ready with some big rant about how things were going to be in their house now that she's pregnant is pretty chilling. Good on OP for getting the gently caress out of there, and I hope she continues to trust her mom's instincts.

# ? Jan 31, 2022 07:22

quantumwell: Jun 22, 2013

deety posted:

Guys like this never seem to realize that if they aren't pitching in on chores or child care, then there isn't much reason to put up with their lovely behavior, especially for someone like OP who has another place to go.

The fact that he was ready with some big rant about how things were going to be in their house now that she's pregnant is pretty chilling. Good on OP for getting the gently caress out of there, and I hope she continues to trust her mom's instincts.

Very telling he waited until she was pregnant to let his real self shine.

# ? Jan 31, 2022 07:27

QueenAnnesDead: Apr 17, 2016

deety posted:

Guys like this never seem to realize that if they aren't pitching in on chores or child care, then there isn't much reason to put up with their lovely behavior, especially for someone like OP who has another place to go.

The fact that he was ready with some big rant about how things were going to be in their house now that she's pregnant is pretty chilling. Good on OP for getting the gently caress out of there, and I hope she continues to trust her mom's instincts.

He's absolutely textbook - apart from showing his hand too early, must be the lack of experience with his first victim - but for me it's actually the sudden crying. The 30 minutes of quiet sermonising on Ye Dutief of Womyn would already have me thinking I might get smothered with a pillow tonight, but the crying creeped me out like a horror movie. Seriously, shudder.

The thread on Reddit is very cheering, for all the grimness of the topic. Absolutely unanimous, pulling no punches, no equivocation, no 'therapy, marital counseling, love language workbooks'. And so very, very many personal stories of abuse escalating massively at pregnancy, backing up the stats of pregnant women being killed by male partners (with sources duly cited).

# ? Jan 31, 2022 07:39

vudan: Dec 11, 2010

Still get a chuckle thinking about that housemates assertive power-move-fart after the guy attempted to shame her. Lol.

# ? Jan 31, 2022 07:47

quantumwell: Jun 22, 2013

The thread on Reddit is very cheering, for all the grimness of the topic. Absolutely unanimous, pulling no punches, no equivocation, no 'therapy, marital counseling, love language workbooks'. And so very, very many personal stories of abuse escalating massively at pregnancy, backing up the stats of pregnant women being killed by male partners (with sources duly cited).
[/quote]

Yes, it's so horrifying the advice is to abort and go into hiding. I don''t kneejerk recommending abortion but this rear end in a top hat makes me afraid for the mother divorced or not.

# ? Jan 31, 2022 07:56

AreWeDrunkYet: Jul 8, 2006

vudan posted:

Still get a chuckle thinking about that housemates assertive power-move-fart after the guy attempted to shame her. Lol.

It was like the "poo poo all over a friend's basement" situation dialed back to a more appropriate level.

# ? Jan 31, 2022 08:12

Ghost Leviathan: Mar 2, 2017; Exploration is ill-advised.

Pregnancy is statistically one of the most dangerous points of a woman's life, for reasons that have nothing to do with potential complications of the pregnancy itself.

quantumwell posted:

Very telling he waited until she was pregnant to let his real self shine.

We also get way too many cases of woman not realising until pregnancy or childbirth that their husband is a useless lump.

# ? Jan 31, 2022 08:16

Invisible Clergy: Sep 25, 2015; "Behold, I will corrupt your seed, and spread dung upon your faces"

Malachi 2:3

Mx. posted:

Did her prank went too far?

p r a n k s

just hilarious japes for pals

Nice to hear from jeopardize the beans op again.

# ? Jan 31, 2022 08:19

Malachite_Dragon: Mar 31, 2010; Weaving Merry Christmas magic

Invisible Clergy posted:

Nice to hear from jeopardize the beans op again.

Unlike the jeopardize the beans thing, the lady here is unequivocally in the wrong. You do not pull this kind of poo poo as a prank.

# ? Jan 31, 2022 08:33

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# ? May 31, 2024 03:55

therobit: Aug 19, 2008; I've been tryin' to speak with you for a long time

Malachite_Dragon posted:

Unlike the jeopardize the beans thing, the lady here is unequivocally in the wrong. You do not pull this kind of poo poo as a prank.

You also do not jeopardize the beans.

# ? Jan 31, 2022 09:02

The Something Awful Forums > Main > General Bullshit > r/relationships: I have nothing against this baby.

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