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May 30, 2024 21:22
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- Mx.
- Dec 16, 2006
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I'm a great fan! When I watch TV I'm always saying "That's political correctness gone mad!"
Why thankyew!
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AITA for talking about my baby kicking?
quote:I used to have a good friend a few years ago I did almost everything with but we have grown apart. It started right after I got married when she would be upset I wanted to do things like spend Christmas or other holidays with my husband and family and not always her.
I always tried to make time like maybe Christmas Eve or Boxing Day etc but she spends Christmas Eve with her family and Boxing Day with her boyfriend because she doesn’t want to see his nieces and nephews on Christmas so she started getting mad at me for ruining her holidays. She is extremely child-free so she only wanted to spend Christmas with friends not family because their kids would be around.
When I got pregnant I told her but she was really quite mean about it. I didn’t want to push it on her and I also didn’t want to deal with her suggestions about terminating the pregnancy and other mean comments so I started distancing myself a bit more. Awhile ago she reached out because she wanted to get coffee but she said she didn’t want to be reminded I was pregnant and asked me to wear baggy clothes not mention it etc., I’m 8 months, I can’t really hide it.
I didn’t want to deal with it so I told her it wasn’t a good time and I couldn’t just entirely hide my pregnancy from her. She was upset but we just left it at that. Today I was out for a walk and I ran into her. She convinced me to take 10 minutes to sit on a bench and catch up. I said sure.
We talked for a bit but then I started getting a series of semi painful kicks and stretches from the baby so I had to stand up. It can be really uncomfortable when they hit certain spots and I can usually stop it by moving. She asked me what I was doing and I said I needed to change position. She rolled her eyes and launched into a rant about how my whole personality is being pregnant now (that was the only time I mentioned it as I know her feelings) she ended up storming off saying I was an rear end in a top hat and she should have just ignored me since I’m not worth talking to anymore if I’m always shoving this down her throat.
I feel upset because I know how child free she is and maybe should have lied but I really felt I wasn’t shoving it at her but also maybe I’m just wrapped up in baby fever and being annoying. AITA?
AITA for being sick and tired of hearing about babies and saying so?
quote:Throwaway because I’m already getting some poo poo for this and don’t need it on my main.
So everyone in my life it feels like is getting married or having babies or whatever. Im in my early 30’s so I get it, but it’s getting obnoxious. For the most part I just keep my opinion to myself but my close friends know I’m militantly child-free so my not giving a flying monkey about their babies shouldn’t be a surprise.
Anyways onto the issue, my closest friend got pregnant in the summer and I was devastated. I kind of thought she was in the same boat as me but obviously not. I’ll admit I reacted a bit poorly when she told me but it was literally months ago. I noticed yesterday we hadn’t talked or hung out in like 4 months (not extremely unusual cuz we both get busy) so I asked her if we could go to a restaurant and catch up.
She said she was dealing with some major health stuff right now so she isn’t going out at the moment, cool I understand that, so I asked if maybe I could come over for tea or something and she was super dismissive like “It’s not going to be the best time for me for awhile.” So I straight up just asked her if something was up.
She told me she didn’t really want to hang out right now because she knows I don’t want to hear about any baby stuff. I told her to just talk about other stuff. Like it shouldn’t be that hard. She’s still a person outside of being a spawn incubator right?
We argued a bit and she pretty much told me she isn’t in the physical or mental headspace to tiptoe around the fact she’s pregnant with me which I literally never asked her to do and she brought up again me mentioning abort**** (mostly jokingly and in reference to me - I was like “Oh geez I’d already be at an abort*** clinic”) months ago and said she just couldn’t handle the “negativity” right now.
I told her she wasn’t doing anyone favours turning into a mommybot and to hit me up when she has a personality again which yeah was maybe a bit harsh but she literally was saying to me we couldn’t hang out because she couldn’t not talk about being pregnant, it seems harsh, but her own words pretty much.
I vented to some of our mutual friends about it and the reactions are split. Some say she’s overreacting and some have talked to her recently and not had it not be about pregnancy anyways so they don’t get her reasoning and others say I’m a huge rear end in a top hat because she’s having major complications so it’s probably hard to just “turn off.” Arguably though today was the first I’d heard of any complications so how would I have known? AITA for being sick of this?
ETA: Alright everyone I get it. I’m the rear end in a top hat. I feel like if I worded this differently and took out some of my jokes it wouldn’t have the Reddit mob so heated lmao but I accept my judgement.
I’m probably just going to let the friendship fizzle. I stand by what I said that if someone had strong religious or political views and asked me not to talk religion or politics etc I wouldn’t and I don’t see why it’s so different for kids but obviously that’s why I should probably just stick to child-free friends lmao.
Thanks to the people who’ve DMed me NTA judgements and get where I’m coming from, I understand why you don’t want to leave them on the post but thank you anyways!
quote:So, I find it interesting you sought the judgement of Reddit to see if you were an rear end in our last conversation, left out details like you opening our call telling me to wear a baggy sweater to “hide my tumour” when inviting me out, and tried to make it seem like we are way closer than we actually have been in years and then still decided to not take any of this to heart and make ME feel like an rear end in a top hat yesterday for standing up from a bench.
I really wish you’d stood by your edit and let things fizzle because they have been fizzling for a long time and I guess I’m glad the last thing we had in common was Reddit so I could see this and get a full understanding of what’s going on in your head. Thank you because now I don’t have to feel guilty for moving on with my life anymore.
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Feb 15, 2022 02:02
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- Blastedhellscape
- Jan 1, 2008
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in brief
-OP is a wholesome moral christian man with no flaws
-he meets a woman at church, both are married with infertile partners, she asks him to impregnate her, to which he agrees with no reservations
-lady gets pregnant, OP never tells his wife, and plays the role of creepy uncle at family events i think, that last bit is unclear
-24 years later, son contacts the OP, having learned that he is his biological father
-OP says sorry, his wife forgives him, and since he repented he is once again an authority on morals and ethics
-OP finds his son's moral character to be lacking and tries to inspire him to virtue (little context for this is given, but it's pretty obvious what kind of "virtue" OP preaches)
-son calls OP a filthy hypocrite and goes low contact, making clear that it will be no contact if OP doesn't stop to reflect on his attitude
-OP wisely concludes that this is the fault of his son's mother and her husband, and also society at large, but not that of any other parents his son might have
There's also the weird line about trying to keep his son from worrying about 'the destruction of the world' that made me think OP is constantly preaching about how climate change is just God's will or some bullshit, but it's all very hard to parse.
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Feb 15, 2022 02:02
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- Hughlander
- May 11, 2005
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AITA for yelling at my aunt that I want to go back to my real home?
quote:So I (16 F) and my little brother Ben (12) live with our Aunt Katie (35). She's like super rich. Like we live on a farm in BC and her house is huge. She's an engineer she goes to fancy dinners, has met MPs and meets businesspeople a lot. Like she got my brother a PS5 the day it came out.
Our mom was not rich, we lived in a one story house but I loved it. After our mom died we were supposed to live with our dad's parents in Ontario but Aunt took us both in instead.
I didn't really know Aunt Katie before that like I remember when I was little she lived with mom and my grandparents but then she was gone one day. Mom always said they had a bad fight but she never talked about it and Aunt Katie's told me enough for me to ge tthe feeling that they didn't really like each other because of it.
I know Aunt Katie loves me, like she'll teach me how to cook, go to my games and help with pre-calc when she's around but it's not like it is with Ben. Like she treats him like he is her son and I've always just felt like I'm staying over.
I dunno I've really been missing home and yesterday after dinner I asked her if I could go and see it and she said no. When I asked why she asked why I would ever want to go back there when she's given me so much better. It kind of started a fight between us and she said she always hated that place and it'd hurt her to go there. Then she said one day I'd appreciate her taking me in to house when its mine and I just yelled back that I want to go back to my real home. She just got really quiet and sent me to my room.
I heard her crying in her room last night when I went to the washroom and I feel bad but I don't know if I'm wrong cause I just want to see it again. When I told Ben about it this morning, he told me I was an rear end in a top hat since I made her cry and she does so much for us.
Writing this in my free period, so not sure I'll be able to respond much.
Edit: quickly putting this in before lunch period ends, my mom died when I was 12 and my brother was 8 and we've lived with Aunt Katie since then. She didn't just take us in this year.
UPDATE: AITA for yelling at my aunt that I want to go back to my real home?
quote:So the day I posted I didn't see Aunt Katie cause she was working all day. But the day after she surprised me by picking me up from school (Ben bussed), she told me we'd talk about things at home. Then she took me shopping and then to the spa and we had the best time together. When we got home after dinner she said we needed to talk now and took me to the nursery. I did get scared cause that's the one room Ben and I aren't allowed to go to.
She said she was sorry if i didn't think of her home as mine yet and would try harder. She told me how bad her parents were to her but it was okay for me to keep loving them cause they weren't like that tome but I can't anymore. She told me she left home cause my mom stole her masters tuition money to pay for me and Ben and she didn't tell me this cause she didn't want me to ever think of my mom as bad but I needed to know why she wasn't going back there. I honestly felt like poo poo at that point. She told me she took us in cause our mom was probably afraid what would happen to us when she was gone and what if being with our dad's parents let him take us. Then she told me how everything she has is for Ben and me and how it will all be ours when shes gone and I just started crying cause I didn't want to think of her being dead like everyone else we love.
I cried like a baby in her arms till my head hurt and I think I ruined her shirt with all the fluids. I tried to remember what you guys told me to say like how I should apologize and stuff to say to her but I couldn't so I just kept saying sorry. When she finally got me to calm down she asked if I felt ok and I rememberedwhat one user said and I told her how I loved doing all the things we do together cause it made it feel like I still have a mom and felt jealous she did so much more with Ben like she wants to be his mom but not mine. She gave me a hug and said she loves me just as much and promised to make more time for just us. She did make me brush and go to bed but she sat on my bed and held my hand till I fell asleep.
I know it was babyish but I did like it and it did make me feel a bit special again.
Since then things have been so much better. We've all been spending so much more time together and it has kinda started feeling like a real family.
Good Aunts are great.
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Feb 15, 2022 02:23
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- Absurd Alhazred
- Mar 27, 2010
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by Athanatos
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AITA for yelling at my aunt that I want to go back to my real home?
UPDATE: AITA for yelling at my aunt that I want to go back to my real home?
Good Aunts are great.
Eye-wateringly wholesome.
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Feb 15, 2022 02:33
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- Smirking_Serpent
- Aug 27, 2009
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I (20F) caught my housemate (23M) masterbating through my bedroom security camera. Do I bring this up?
quote:TL:DR Housemate was enjoying himself in the living room but my bedroom security camera caught it on tape and saved the video.
First some background info. I'll call my housemate M for short. we met on a dating app over a year ago and saw each other a few times for dates and sex. I wasn't interested in anything further and we settled on being friends, M did confess his feelings for me at the time but seemed content with remaining friends. Over time M became my closest friend. I ended up in a relationship with someone else and M has an active dating life, despite this, there was no weirdness stemming from the circumstances we met.
We decided to move in together as my lease was up and he was living in a share house. The rent where I live is one of the highest in the world so it was a choice between living with my closest friend or in a share house with 5 strangers for the same price.
I had bought a security camera before we lived together for when I was away from home for days at a time to monitor my cats.
Now back to the present. I was going to be staying at my partner's place for a few days so I set up my camera on my bedroom shelf and informed M that I had done so, the camera captures my bedroom and because my door is always left open for the cats, it had view of half the couch in the living room. When sitting on the couch, the camera is in plain view.
I have a live feed on my phone and would check it occassionally to say hi to the cats thru the speaker, M would hear my voice and pop in frame to flip me off.
And then it happened, I got a notification of movement on the camera and tapped it. I saw M on the couch and he was moving his hand, I thought he was patting my cat on his lap so I zoomed in to take a look. And that was my mistake... It dawned on me what was happening and I instantly recoiled and closed the app. I was frozen in horror, my first thought was please don't get anything on the couch and then, gently caress... my camera records all movement detection on the SD card. The camera is clearly visible if you were to look in the direction of my bedroom from the couch, but I don't believe he would purposely do it in view of the camera.
I went back to the app and turned on the privacy mode to stop any further recording.
So my question now is, do I tell him? Firstly, I would rather him not jerk the chicken on our shared couch. Secondly his penis is now stored on my sd card, I'll have to go thru the footage and manually delete it. I feel if I was in this situation I would want to be told, especially because the footage stored. However I am dreading how awkward the situation would be and I don't want to embarrass him, then again I don't want to encounter any accidents seeped into the upholstery.
Note: my history with him doesn't make discussing sexual things or seeing parts less awkward. I'm a neurodivergent person and talking isn't my strong point
Seems like some people are confused and claiming I'm a type of predator. M knew the camera was there because I told him and pointed it out, when he would come say hi to it, he would stand behind the bedroom doorframe which is opposite the couch. The view of the couch the camera had before I left was far more limited, I wouldn't have been able to see that activity, until M came into my room looking for a spray bottle to water my plants while I was gone, he moved the position of the door while doing so and this lead to the camera having more view than I had anticipated, this I did not notice until later on. And I really didn't expect that he would require some high level of privacy on the couch
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Feb 15, 2022 02:39
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- Sisal Two-Step
- May 29, 2006
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mom without jaw
dad without wife
i'm taking all the Ls now, sorry
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AITA for yelling at my aunt that I want to go back to my real home?
UPDATE: AITA for yelling at my aunt that I want to go back to my real home?
Good Aunts are great.
Goddamn I got teary eyed at that update.
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Feb 15, 2022 02:40
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- value-brand cereal
- May 2, 2008
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I (20F) caught my housemate (23M) masterbating through my bedroom security camera. Do I bring this up?
"Secondly his penis is now stored on my sd card, I'll have to go thru the footage and manually delete it."
God I love the future. Where else could you hear such a sentence? Middle evil ages?? Get outta here!!
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Feb 15, 2022 02:54
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- Evil Willow
- Apr 26, 2007
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Bored now...
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I (22F) accidentally ended up in a poly relationship with my boyfriend (29M) and his roommate?
quote:I don’t even know how to explain my situation. Basically I met my boyfriend on a dating app 5 months ago. We clicked right away and I love being his girlfriend. I’m a big girl and I know I’m not attractive so I’m really lucky to have him in my life. He told me right away that he is a very sexual person so since I didn’t have much sexual experience before him, he’s been showing me things and getting me to try new things with him. One of those new things was threesomes.
We talked about it and I said I wouldn’t mind trying but in the back of my head I thought we would discuss the details before making it happen. Well it ended up happening sooner that I expected one night when we were drunk. We were making out in his living room and he asked his roommate to join us. After that time it seems like it just became normal for his roommate to join us and be sexual with me even when my bf isn’t involved. It’s getting to the point where he kisses me when he gets home and tells me that I’m hot and he loves me. My bf says he has always wanted to be in a situation like this and loves to see me with his roommate but it is getting awkward for me because they’re both giving me a lot of attention when the only one I really love is my bf and I’d love to go back to focusing on just us. I’m only doing this because I know my boyfriend enjoys it. I’ve spent years depressed, hoping a guy would even look at me and now that I have 2 of them I’m scared that maybe I’m self sabotaging by having all these thoughts. How do I figure out what I should do? How do I make sure that I won’t hurt their feelings and potentially lose my bf?
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Feb 15, 2022 03:07
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- Invisible Clergy
- Sep 25, 2015
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"Behold, I will corrupt your seed, and spread dung upon your faces"
Malachi 2:3
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There's also the weird line about trying to keep his son from worrying about 'the destruction of the world' that made me think OP is constantly preaching about how climate change is just God's will or some bullshit, but it's all very hard to parse.
Boomers tend to write like they think: badly.
Maybe I'm the weirdo. Sitting in someone else's lap feels non-platonic when both parties have reached puberty.
No, incest OP is the weirdo. If you're short on chairs, have your girlfriend sit on your lap and hug and kiss her, not your sister
Wife went from "free spirit" to "irresponsible, colossal dick" in a few sentences
Like people who describe themselves as "empaths," anyone who describes themselves as a "free spirit" is an irredeemable piece of poo poo.
AITA for not telling my wife of 7 years that I have ADHD before she filed for divorce?
Chronic beingahugepieceofshititis is often misdiagnosed as ADHD.
AITA for telling my girlfriend it’s weird that she wants to name our son after her dead ex boyfriend
Nice to see reincucknation make a guest appearance.
It's Valentine's Day. Can someone link me the cuck shack article?
It was surprisingly difficult to find since we reference it so often, but here you go: Happy Valentine's Day!
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Feb 15, 2022 03:13
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- McKilligan
- May 13, 2007
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Acey Deezy
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There's also the weird line about trying to keep his son from worrying about 'the destruction of the world' that made me think OP is constantly preaching about how climate change is just God's will or some bullshit, but it's all very hard to parse.
"The World (and literally everything within it and derived from it)" as a corrupting influence that actively and constantly attempts to subvert Your Personal Relationship With God that you must actively resist at all times is a pervasive mindfuck that takes at least a couple of years to fully disentangle from. It's remarkably convenient in that it instills a self-policing mindset within a group which innoculates and insulates them against, well, everything.
It varies depending on the particular strain of Christianity, but participation in the Destruction of the World can be as innocuous as watching anything edgier than Veggietales to not being sufficiently angry about [insert group here] and their vile agenda.
McKilligan fucked around with this message at 03:17 on Feb 15, 2022
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Feb 15, 2022 03:13
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- Grape
- Nov 16, 2017
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Happily shilling for China!
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AITA for talking about my baby kicking?
AITA for being sick and tired of hearing about babies and saying so?
Whoever itt said that Childfree creeps are basically super immature losers upset that something even more immature might usurp them?
Well howdy exhibit A here, early 30's woman who talks like a 2003 era internet tween with "not giving a flying monkey" and poo poo lol.
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Feb 15, 2022 03:56
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- Grape
- Nov 16, 2017
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Happily shilling for China!
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Pregnant Friend: Look, Janey, we've grown apart I think. I don't know why either of us is trying to keep making this a thing...
*CF lady is making Invader Zim Gir noises while stomping up and down on a baby shower invitation*
Grape fucked around with this message at 04:30 on Feb 15, 2022
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Feb 15, 2022 04:07
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- Betty Wight
- Jan 1, 2022
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AITA for talking about my baby kicking?
AITA for being sick and tired of hearing about babies and saying so?
Just delightful. I will never understand the child-free craziness. I mean they are just as feral as the “mommybots” they describe. Folks need to find better identities.
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Feb 15, 2022 04:21
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- Hellblazer187
- Oct 12, 2003
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Is there a word for people who know they do not want children, without going off the child free deep end? Because I know having kids is not for me but Jesus Christ at suggesting an abortion or calling it a tumor what is wrong with that woman.
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Feb 15, 2022 04:24
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- Betty Wight
- Jan 1, 2022
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Is there a word for people who know they do not want children, without going off the child free deep end? Because I know having kids is not for me but Jesus Christ at suggesting an abortion or calling it a tumor what is wrong with that woman.
I don’t think it needs a special word. I don’t think every preference needs a group or an identity or categorization. Just let folks make choices. The moment someone says “I’m a ______” they are always off the deep end.
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Feb 15, 2022 04:29
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- Grape
- Nov 16, 2017
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Happily shilling for China!
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Is there a word for people who know they do not want children, without going off the child free deep end? Because I know having kids is not for me but Jesus Christ at suggesting an abortion or calling it a tumor what is wrong with that woman.
It's precisely because they don't have a word for themselves that we know they aren't Childfree people.
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Feb 15, 2022 04:30
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- trickybiscuits
- Jan 13, 2008
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yospos
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AITA For Not Giving My Parents "Equal" Time With My Child?
quote:You're right if I had gone to a bank they would've asked for the things my parents did, but I didn't go to a bank. I went to my family. My family who also said more than once in that same conversation that I "set myself up for failure" and talked about how much better of a position my sister was in.
Lol, they forced him to build a life without them and now that he's got something they want they're upset they're not part of his life
Actually there are two different issues: their cutting him off when he wouldn't let them choose his major, and their feeling of entitlement to his child.
quote:NTA. Your parents are treating you like the other parent in a divorce, that they're arguing custody with; instead of acting like just the grandparents that they are. It doesn't matter what they feel is fair. They're not in control of your family's choices.
eta: heh, Mrs. Ferrars.
trickybiscuits fucked around with this message at 05:51 on Feb 15, 2022
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Feb 15, 2022 04:30
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- Halloween Jack
- Sep 12, 2003
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I WILL CUT OFF BOTH OF MY ARMS BEFORE I VOTE FOR ANYONE THAT IS MORE POPULAR THAN BERNIE!!!!!
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Yeah, schadenfreude.
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Feb 15, 2022 04:44
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- kimbo305
- Jun 9, 2007
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actually, yeah, I am a little mad
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AITA for talking about my baby kicking?
AITA for being sick and tired of hearing about babies and saying so?
I'm never emotionally ready when there's both sides to a story but the poster here doesn't announce it up front.
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Feb 15, 2022 04:54
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- Blastedhellscape
- Jan 1, 2008
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He means spiritual destruction by the world, but as noted he is either not a native English speaker or has the linguistic intelligence of a five year old and cannot express ideas coherently.
Yeah. Despite the fact that I grew up adjacent to it (grew up in the rural south) I think that I'm just fundamental incapable of ever fully understanding American-style evangelical fundamentalist protestantism. And I'm very okay with that. When they start talking about the sin-cursed world or testifying or being blessed it just starts to sound like moon language to me.
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Feb 15, 2022 05:07
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- therobit
- Aug 19, 2008
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I've been tryin' to speak with you for a long time
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AITA For Not Giving My Parents "Equal" Time With My Child?
Just beautiful.
there are all sorts of people in the world
AITA for snapping at my coworker for making fun of me wearing a seatbelt?
Anti- vax also being anti-seatbelt seems like a self-correcting problem. Unfortunately probably not as rapidly as we would hope.
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Feb 15, 2022 05:25
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- Blastedhellscape
- Jan 1, 2008
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Why do men keep doing this.
Eh. I can understand the impulse to find out the biological truth about your kid's parentage if you're feeling some doubt. Most people want to know the full story about their lives and what's going on in them. Of course *demanding* a paternity test is a great way to nuke your relationship because of the obvious trust issues it brings to the surface.
Also, what really blows my mind are the stories where there's a paternity test, the dude who's been raising a kid for ten or fifteen years finds out that he isn't the biological father, and then he just abandons the poor kid in the most brutal way possible. Jesus Christ. Lucius Vorinus in the HBO series Rome was in your exact same situation and acted more honorably than you, and he was a hosed-up bloodthirsty murder! I'm not biologically related to any of the dogs or cats that I've had along the years, but I still feed them, shelter them, and give them unconditional love. You really should be able to do that and more for your sixteen-year-old daughter who you found out last year was the product of an affair rather than your own semen. You've still spent sixteen years getting to know each other. That's family!
My granddad's eldest daughter *probably* wasn't his (my mom and other family members have pointed out that the timeline of her conception doesn't make sense, and my aunt looked a *lot* like some store owner who my grandmom was really flirty with), and I've always figured that my granddad also knew. But he wasn't an rear end in a top hat so gave my eldest aunt the same sort of love and attention that he gave his other kids.
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Feb 15, 2022 05:42
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- therobit
- Aug 19, 2008
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I've been tryin' to speak with you for a long time
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From r/Legaladvice
Friend Left Car Out To Be Stolen
quote:
I had a friend who was interested in buying my car, I gave him the key and left the registration in the car but took the tags. I knew the guy and trusted him to pay me. After 3 months, he still hadn't paid me so I told him I was coming to pick it up. He told me that he was going to park the car on the street leave the keys in the car so it would get stolen. He lives an hour away, I checked the apartment he lives in and the car is gone. He won't answer his door or the phone. I found out from a mutual acquaintance that he is using crack or something.
I talked to the cops and they said that since I left the car with him, there was not much they could do. Can anyone give me some advice on what I can do? Thanks.
How do you not know your buddy is a crackhead?
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Feb 15, 2022 06:04
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- therobit
- Aug 19, 2008
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I've been tryin' to speak with you for a long time
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AITA for keeping an inheritance from my ex husband's homophobic family?
quote:
I (33f) married my childhood best friend John (33m) when we were 22. I knew he was gay, and we decided to get married for several reasons (taxes, convenience, to keep his family from finding out, etc.). I got along with his family, who loved me. John had med school paid for by his family. I didn't have a job, and instead became a full time caretaker for his maternal grandparents who, when we first got married, were 85 and 87 and were dealing with multiple health problems. John's family supported us both financially through John's medical training. Once John got his MD and finished residency 3 years ago, he decided to come out to his parents.
We got divorced (we decided against telling the family that I knew all along). John's parents cut him off completely when he moved in with his boyfriend, basically disowning him. His grandparents weren't told about him being gay (everyone was pretty much in agreement that it wasn't a good idea, as they were quite fragile physically and mentally at this point). But they knew we divorced. And whereas John used to come see his grandparents frequently, because his parents had disowned him, John decided to pretty much limit contact with his entire family and never really visited or called.
On the other hand, I had been his grandparents' main caretaker for so long that I
1) didn't have any other career training to support myself
2) figured it would make sense for me to continue being their caretaker, as they were rapidly declining, and didn't want them to adjust poorly to a lot of new changes.
I moved into his grandparents' home with them. While I was angry at John's parents for their treatment of him, I still loved his grandparents who had always been kind to me. When they passed (within a few weeks of each other), his grandfather ended up willing almost their entire estate to me, about 12 million in assets. John and his mom each received about 50k.
John and I discussed it, and I felt it was fair that he received a higher proportion, and we're both happy and comfortable with how we divided it. His parents on the other hand had expected to receive the bulk of the inheritance and accused me of abusing his grandparents and manipulating them into willing almost everything to me. Apparently the had made some business decisions, assuming they would receive the money. They also argued that they would have gone ballistic if they knew John was using their money to "fund his lifestyle." I honestly hadn't thought of their will at all when they passed. It had never come up, but I feel John deserves the money after the way his parents treated him, and John tells me I deserved to be taken care of after I spent more than a decade of my life caring for his grandparents. Are we the assholes for keeping the inheritance when his parents had made plans based on their assumptions of the inheritance?
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Feb 15, 2022 06:11
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- lumpentroll
- Mar 4, 2020
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AITA for asking my wife not to gaze into people’s windows at night while I drive?
quote:
My wife has a habit of looking in people’s windows at night while I drive. She says they should close their curtains if they don’t want people looking in. I say don’t be looking, bound to see something. I don’t have concerns about her cheating but it seems like associated behavior. She gets super defensive every time I comment about it and turns into an argument where IATA according to her. Going on 15 years of this and I finally discovered this forum to reach out about it. AITA?
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Feb 15, 2022 06:26
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- therobit
- Aug 19, 2008
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I've been tryin' to speak with you for a long time
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AITA for asking that my daughter not share a room with a special needs kid?
quote:
I (35f) have four kids, 10F, 6M, 4F and 1F.
Our eldest, 'Izzy' is 10. She is a doll. My son, 'Luke' has autism and ADHD and while lovable, can be a bit of a handful at times. Therefore, Izzy is witness to both the fun and not-so-fun parts of neurodiversity and has developed saintly patience and a knack for helping special needs kids with a sense of maturity beyond her years.
Particulary notable is her kindness with 'Maisy', a girl in her class with autism and severe anxiety, which has worsened as a result of the tumult of the last few years. Izzy's help to Maisy has been bought to my attention before and I am a super proud mama. Next weekend, school are taking my daughter's class on a trip, and on Thursday, Izzy's teacher asked her to be in a room with Maisy, saying it would make Maisy happy (Maisy has intense separation anxiety and has never been away from home before) but framing it as a choice. Always obedient and wanting to do good by her teachers, Izzy agreed but came home crying saying that she didn't want to be with Maisy, because she wanted a break from having to 'be stressed so others can be happy'. This made my heart break, and I know more than anyone that my daughter deserves a chance to be a kid, as in all the lockdowns, she didn't have her usual outlets of sports clubs and had to spend a lot of time with a cranky Luke whose routine had been destroyed and a toddler who was very excited to have her big sis at home. While my husband and I always tried to do 1:1 activities, it admittedly got harder once his furlough ended and I unexpectedly got pregnant with our youngest. Luke also found the baby difficult sensory-wise, so whichever parent wasn't tending to the baby often had to be elsewhere with Luke meaning not as much attention was on Izzy as we would have liked.
I feel so bad that my daughter has had a rough ride, and frankly want to give her a chance to be a little girl instead of an adult. I contacted her teacher, who is aware of the situation with Luke, who agreed that letting Izzy have a break would be a good thing. Today the school spoke to Maisy's mum, informing her of Maisy's room on the trip. I know the girls in the room and they are lovely but she was clearly unhappy. She asked me to ask Izzy again. When I said that it was her choice and I have to respect it, she sent a trade on how I was bringing Izzy up to be intolerant, how Maisy will feel that Izzy has abandoned her and how I would feel if it is my son. She is now considering pulling Maisy out of the trip as she feels she would not cope with her separation anxiety without Izzy.
My husband thinks that it is the school and Maisy's mum's job, not Izzy's, to accommodate her, but her comments are ringing in my head. After all, I am not just Izzy's mum, but also Luke's and as much as I worry about her missing out, I worry about him being isolated too. I know exactly how Maisy's mum feels, and how much it sucks, yet am not doing the one thing to alleviate her pain. AITA?
YTA for continuing to have more kids after the first special needs kid who needs more attention than you can give while still parenting other kids, and for making your eldest play second fiddle to everyone else. If you can’t stop having unplanned pregnancies, you or your partner need to get sterilized.
therobit fucked around with this message at 06:54 on Feb 15, 2022
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Feb 15, 2022 06:28
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- Lone Goat
- Apr 16, 2003
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When life gives you lemons, suplex those lemons.
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AITA for asking that my daughter not share a room with a special needs kid?
I (35f) have four kids, 10F, 6M, 4F and 1F.
YTA for continuing to have more kids after the first special needs kid who needs more attention than you can give while still parenting other kids, and for making your eldest play second fiddle to everyone else. If you can’t stop having unplanned pregnancies, you or your partner need to get sterilized.
She's Luke's mum, and Izzy's mum (barely, apparently), but she's definitely not Maisy's mum.
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Feb 15, 2022 06:51
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- Hughlander
- May 11, 2005
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I kinda think it's all brainworms. If you can literally see it from the street and in a moving car, that's not "looking in windows". I can't imagine a configuration of window/vehicle/road that makes this make any sense in.
"Ah yes I think I saw .01 second of a peen as we passed from a whole yard away."
I don't know, he never said she was with him... Maybe she stares into the neighbor's windows from their living room while he's out doing late night deliveries?
AITA for uninviting my SIL to my wedding for her trashy behavior?
quote:Me(f24) and my fiancee (28m) are getting married in 2 months. His sister (30f) is nice enough, but I've always gotten the sense she doesn't like me. She's never been rude, but she just seems uninterested in me. Even so, when our families get together, her and her bf are personable enough. I come from scholars and they don't, so my family liked that she's a nurse..or so we thought.
My cousins (both 34m) came to town for a visit last week, and said they were going to go out that night and they wouldn't be back til way late. They ended up coming back super early, and when we asked (me, my parents and my fiancee) what happened, turned out they got kicked out of a strip club for taking a picture of a dancer, and it was fiancee's sister. I was MORTIFIED because i never her took her for the type. We told fiancee's parents and it was a HUGE thing, lots of drama between her and their parents. Eventually everything calmed down and it became "she's an adult, it's none of our business". This really rubbed me the wrong way, and i told fiancee that I was no longer comfortable with her coming to the wedding. I was met with a lot of resistance but eventually he agreed. When i called her to explain myself, she blew up at me and told me i was shaming her for something that didn't effect me. I told her it did effect me if she would be bringing a trashy atmosphere to my wedding. We come from money, and the last thing i want is men lining up for her services outside the broom closet, and i told her that much. She said she was offended that i suddenly think of her that way, and i told her she was more suited to a bachelor party than a wedding, and i hung up. Well ever since then, their family has been telling me how much of a bitch i am for telling her what they won't. And now my fiancee is starting to say i should reconsider but i don't think bringing a stripper to a wedding is appropriate.
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Feb 15, 2022 06:53
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- El Spamo
- Aug 21, 2003
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Fuss and misery
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"We come from money"
Oooh ho ho ho ho gently caress you
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Feb 15, 2022 06:57
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- trickybiscuits
- Jan 13, 2008
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yospos
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AITA for asking that my daughter not share a room with a special needs kid?
YTA for continuing to have more kids after the first special needs kid who needs more attention than you can give while still parenting other kids, and for making your eldest play second fiddle to everyone else. If you can’t stop having unplanned pregnancies, you or your partner need to get sterilized.
She's Luke's mum, and Izzy's mum (barely, apparently), but she's definitely not Maisy's mum.
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Feb 15, 2022 07:10
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- Adbot
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ADBOT LOVES YOU
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May 30, 2024 21:22
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- the holy poopacy
- May 16, 2009
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hey! check this out
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Fun Shoe
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"We come from money"
Oooh ho ho ho ho gently caress you
paying women for access to their bodies and then proceeding to violate what few boundaries they have to protect them: classy, upstanding, dignified
paying for basic necessities by selling access to your body: trashy, disgusting, not fit for the presence of civilized people
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Feb 15, 2022 07:10
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Feb 15, 2022 01:57
