r/relationships: I have nothing against this baby.

The Something Awful Forums > Main > General Bullshit > r/relationships: I have nothing against this baby.

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The Automator: Jan 16, 2009

wtf is wrong with people jesus christ

# ? Mar 2, 2022 20:34

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# ? May 30, 2024 15:38

The Automator: Jan 16, 2009

limp_cheese posted:

She should also run with his idea of photoshopping people's physical flaws and write up a list of all his flaws she wants corrected in the picture. Tell him he's too fat, his nose is too hosed up, his bulge is too small, or whatever and see how he reacts. Hell, run with it to the point she tells her FMIL that she's right and here is a list of HER physical flaws that need to be photoshopped out. Anybody that tells OP this is wrong gets a list of all their physical flaws. Get as petty as possible to make it hurt.

Its hard enough to come to terms with facial scars without these wastes of air making life harder.

that was my first thought, like if i got some poo poo like that about my scars, you can bet whoever suggested it is getting a giant list of things they should be ashamed of also

# ? Mar 2, 2022 20:38

B-Rock452: Jan 6, 2005

Arsenic Lupin posted:

In the comments to that one, somebody linked to this one:
AITA for not thinking the joke my family played on my GF was a big deal?

Holy gently caress my sense of humor can be just pitch black but never at someone's expense like that. That's just cruel and awful and if he had any stones he should have ripped the shirts off his family members and thrown them into the fire place.

# ? Mar 2, 2022 20:43

Captain Hygiene: Sep 17, 2007; You mess with the crabbo...

fish and chips and dip posted:

AITA for refusing to have my facial scar photoshopped for the wedding?

Aaron is the unsung hero in the story, for selflessly showing OP what a poo poo he and his family are in time to get out

# ? Mar 2, 2022 20:45

Soylent Pudding: Jun 22, 2007; We've got people!

AITA for refusing to let my friends use my owl as a ringbearer in their wedding?

quote:

I am a Falconer and perform in Falconry shows with my owls. There is some debate in the community over owls being used but it has gained a lot of traction over the years and I find my owls are easier to manage for me personally than my other birds were.

My friend is having a Harry Potter themed wedding and is begging to have me work with one of my owls to have the ring flown down the aisle to them bringing up how well trained they are and how it will really sell the moment. Now, in theory this could be done after all 9 times out of 10 they'll do exactly as I want it's just the 1 time i'm worried about and I don't exactly want to take that risk with wedding rings.

I explained my concerns to my friend and said it wasn't a risk i'd advise they take, I offered as an alternative me coming with all my owls and helping them and the guests take pictures with them and maybe even do a little brief flying show as a gift to them. My friend is upset with me saying she has seen how well i've trained them and has complete confidence they wont mess up, and how this would be such a huge thing for the wedding.

It's their risk to take I guess but I a just not entirely comfortable with this....am I the rear end in a top hat for saying no? should I just agree but stress that if a gently caress up happens it's not on me as I warned them?

# ? Mar 2, 2022 20:45

nashona: May 8, 2014; Though she be but little, she is fierce

fish and chips and dip posted:

A loofah is a vegetable, or is that

Anyway, content

AITA for refusing to have my facial scar photoshopped for the wedding?

It's funny how it's never a "big deal", yet the other side won't drop it

# ? Mar 2, 2022 20:46

Baronjutter: Dec 31, 2007; "Tiny Trains"

"It's just how they are" just boils my blood. It comes up in so many stories of abusive lovely family members. It's so meaningless and spineless.

# ? Mar 2, 2022 20:49

Soylent Pudding: Jun 22, 2007; We've got people!

AITA for gifting my mom and her husband a book on cheating for their anniversary?

quote:

I'm (16 M) and I love my mom (35) but when I was 10 she had an affair and left us, I visited her as often as I could and she always seemed so happy when I was there but I hated her new family so I stopped visiting. Honestly we rarely ever saw each other after just for my birthday and events really. She wants us to be close but I want nothing to do with her new husband so I've kept my distance.

Except on Feb 20th my dad announced he'd be out on business till the 12th and my grandparents are stuck visiting relatives in Italy and so I really had nowhere to go and my mom jumped at the chance to have me stay with her. And just my luck that my mom's anniversary with her husband was on Sunday.

I haven't had a good time here at all so all I do is stay in my room doing homework or go out with friends to avoid family activities cause it sucks seeing how lovey dovey she is with her husband and how they seem like the perfect family with their daughters. The morning before her anniversary day she came to my bed and tried to cuddle with me like before she left us but it made me angry like we can't go back in time and pretend it's how it was. So I just pretended to be asleep and stayed curled up and frozen till she left. I started crying cause of that and I felt angry and snarky and my mom majored in literature so I got her a copy of Anna Karenina for her anniversary. That book's about a lady who leaves her husband and son for her lover. I've never read it but I watched the movie with my girlfriend and I hated it.

The anniversary party was on Sunday. Everyone was having fun but me and then people gave their gifts. I gave mine and when my mom saw what it was she seemed shocked but just said thanks. The party ended like an hour after. But at night when she was in her room I heard her crying really loudly. So I kinda eavesdropped a little and heard her saying stuff about that book and me and her husband trying to calm her. The next day at breakfast she left for work early before I woke up and her husband straight up called me an rear end in a top hat and other stuff for gifting them that. It's been a few days now and my mom has barely talked to me. Honestly I feel so wrong I made my mom cry but at the same time I don't want to be here and she knows that so am I really the rear end in a top hat?

# ? Mar 2, 2022 20:50

haveblue: Aug 15, 2005; Toilet Rascal

Soylent Pudding posted:

AITA for refusing to let my friends use my owl as a ringbearer in their wedding?

If your only concern is that the bird might lose or damage a really expensive ring and you're OK with bringing a trained bird into a church or whatever, have it fly with a fake ring and quietly swap it out once it makes the delivery

# ? Mar 2, 2022 20:52

Trollologist: Mar 3, 2010; by Fluffdaddy

Soylent Pudding posted:

AITA for gifting my mom and her husband a book on cheating for their anniversary?

God this is dark.

Hilarious because I don't see anyway that mom can fix what was broken without having a deep Convo with her kid that clearly never happened.

# ? Mar 2, 2022 20:55

Sisal Two-Step: May 29, 2006; mom without jaw
dad without wife

i'm taking all the Ls now, sorry

AITA for asking my girlfriend to shower more thoroughly?

quote:

Throwaway because she knows my main.

I (34M) moved in with my girlfriend (23F) a few months ago. She's wonderful and she's been extremely supportive of me since I lost my job last month.

Recently I've noticed she's been lax with her personal hygiene - she showers every day but it seems like she's got a new pimple almost every morning. She also takes extremely short showers, which seems weird to me. I brought this up to her last night over dinner and suggested she take more care cleaning herself,

She freaked out and went to her friend's apartment last night so I figured I must have hit a nerve, but I thought I was being reasonable? She doesn't usually get upset for no reason. I keep texting her trying to get her to calm down, I care about her and I don't want her to be mad at me.

AITA?

# ? Mar 2, 2022 21:16

titty_baby_: Nov 11, 2015

Sisal Two-Step posted:

AITA for asking my girlfriend to shower more thoroughly?

Patrick Bateman

# ? Mar 2, 2022 21:17

TehRedWheelbarrow: Mar 16, 2011; Fan of Britches

The Automator posted:

wtf is wrong with people jesus christ

# ? Mar 2, 2022 21:20

Uncle Enzo: Apr 28, 2008; I always wanted to be a Wizard

haveblue posted:

If your only concern is that the bird might lose or damage a really expensive ring and you're OK with bringing a trained bird into a church or whatever, have it fly with a fake ring and quietly swap it out once it makes the delivery

My thoughts exactly, if the only hazard is the rings get lost just have it deliver prop rings. The real rings are in the grooms pocket or something. Plan A or plan B the rings are safe the whole time.

# ? Mar 2, 2022 21:23

odiv: Jan 12, 2003

Sisal Two-Step posted:

AITA for asking my girlfriend to shower more thoroughly?

"my boyfriend doesn't wash his rear end"

"my girlfriend sometimes gets a pimple"

These things are the same.

# ? Mar 2, 2022 21:25

Midnight Voyager: Jul 2, 2008; Lipstick Apathy

The Bramble posted:

The adoption chat reminded me of a rather haunting investigative reporting series by Reuters that's almost 10 years old but still in the back of my mind all these years later. While I'm sure there are reputable private adoption agencies out there, there's plenty of ones who aren't and once the check clears lose track of the kid taken from some foreign orphanage. Just a heads up that this link leads to first hand accounts of child abuse and sexual exploitation but is still a very, very good read.

https://www.reuters.com/investigates/adoption/#article/part1

The adoption industry got big by kidnapping and stealing babies from the poor, so this is not in any way surprising. Just REAL depressing.

Who was it, Ric Flair? I think it was Ric Flair that found out he'd been kidnapped as a baby to be adopted out.

Midnight Voyager fucked around with this message at 21:33 on Mar 2, 2022

# ? Mar 2, 2022 21:28

Absurd Alhazred: Mar 27, 2010; by Athanatos

AITA for calling my grandma an alcoholic?

quote:

Growing up me (19M) and my grandma have never had a good relationship mostly because she didn't like my mom cause she was Japanese. She especially didn't like me after I came out when I was 14. My mom died in an accident when I was 5 and I had to go live with my dad and stepmom and my younger brothers. My grandma would purposefully forget my birthdays or only give my brother's presents and even tried to get my dad to force me to change my name from my more Japanese to something more "American".

I was a really scrawny kid and I was also diagnosed with anorexia around 12 and my grandma' would constantly make fun of me about my body or my ED so I'm still pretty sensitive about it and she knows it even I've gotten much better now. Well I came home for the weekend to introduce my new boyfriend to my dad and fam and my grandma also happened to be visiting...

At Sunday dinner she decides to go into a whole diatribe about how I used to be so scrawny and small as a kid and how she'd catch me hiding food and other stuff. I started panicng and welling up especially because I hadn't told my bf about my issues yet and I just kinda blurted out that at least I wasn't a wrinkly old alcoholic.( she's literally always drinking or drunk and no one ever says anything to her) She got way upset took her wine and went upstairs. Me and my boyfriend left right after.

I've been getting calls from my dad and my stepmom saying that I was rude and I shouldn't have said something like that about my grandma and that what I said hurt her. AITA?

Reacting to being called an alcoholic by taking your wine and leaving is :discourse:

# ? Mar 2, 2022 21:30

Seth Pecksniff: May 27, 2004; can't believe shrek is fucking dead. rip to a real one.

Soylent Pudding posted:

AITA for refusing to let my friends use my owl as a ringbearer in their wedding?

"A Harry Potter themed wedding"

I presume both of these people to be... early/mid 30s?

# ? Mar 2, 2022 21:32

DoctorWhat: Nov 18, 2011; A little privacy, please?

Soylent Pudding posted:

AITA for refusing to let my friends use my owl as a ringbearer in their wedding?

Having a Harry Potter wedding makes you the rear end in a top hat.

# ? Mar 2, 2022 21:52

quantumwell: Jun 22, 2013

DoctorWhat posted:

Having a Harry Potter wedding makes you the rear end in a top hat.

I thought the whole Harry Potter thing was over years ago ?

# ? Mar 2, 2022 21:59

Arsenic Lupin: Apr 12, 2012; This particularly rapid💨 unintelligible 😖patter💁 isn't generally heard🧏‍♂️, and if it is🤔, it doesn't matter💁.

I think OP's issue is not so much "owl might drop the rings" as "owl might become overwhelmed by the lights and the people and the noise and injure somebody, possibly me."

# ? Mar 2, 2022 22:04

Soylent Pudding: Jun 22, 2007; We've got people!

AITA for trolling my (25F) team member (45M) at work and getting him fired?

quote:

I (25F) work for a distributor that supplies the hospitality industry.

I initially joined as a customer service representative as a temporary role. The managers liked me and invited me back to cover their ordering department.

Then they offered me a operations role and I'll be honest I love it. The account managers are responsible for the selling and fiscal aspects but I am responsible for logistics, supply chain, customer complaints, and basically anything they can't do while mobile (so basically everything else, they are the face, I am the background program that keeps it all running).

Word got out that I was good at what I do and I am now responsible for the most accounts due to account managers asking for me. The customer from the company's biggest account won't actually deal with anyone else but me.

This is all well and good and I am proud of myself for doing well because I couldn't go to college (long story) but... I am the youngest on my team of 12 by 10 years... and... they all hate me.

The oldest member of our team,M, is the worst for it. He has made a lot of remarks over my time with the company usually calling me a "girl" and basically saying I don't deserve to be there.

I maybe did the wrong thing and just started calling him on it saying "Now, you wouldn't want people to think this team isn't civilized" ect.

This was made worse when, recently, I accepted a promotion to logistics manager. My boss announced it and my account managers are upset that I won't be taking care of the accounts anymore. My team are upset because they think I am too young and unqualified.

I was going to make a cuppa when turning into the kitchen I heard the oldest member of my team saying "I can't belive that white witch lilith got that promotion!" To which, I heard another team member reply that they were shocked and then compared me to Miranda Priestley in the Devil Wears Prada.

I rounded the corner the rest of the way. Smiled. They left awkwardly. Then, right or wrong I got pissed off. I wasn't blessed with being socially gifted. I was however blessed with being a problem solver, and I am okay with that. What I am not okay it is being treated badly because of it. We all have strong and weak points.

So I started signing any email interactions I had with him "Lilith" or "Miranda". My boss knew, I had discussed it. However M went over his head and got upper management involved.

There was a meeting. He said I was making him uncomfortable. I then pointed management (and HR) to all the times I had complained on him making nasty comments to start. Not only that, but I showed them an email where he told me "I was a little girl who knew nothing and didn't deserve the promotion".

He got let go.

I didn't think his behaviour was fair or nice but maybe I should have just kept my mouth shut. It is someone's livelihood, at the same time I think he hung himself. AITA?

# ? Mar 2, 2022 22:13

tractor fanatic: Sep 9, 2005; Pillbug

wow what an ending

# ? Mar 2, 2022 22:15

TehRedWheelbarrow: Mar 16, 2011; Fan of Britches

go girl.

# ? Mar 2, 2022 22:16

Midnight Voyager: Jul 2, 2008; Lipstick Apathy

Soylent Pudding posted:

AITA for trolling my (25F) team member (45M) at work and getting him fired?

at the same time I think he hung himself. AITA?

uhhhhhh is that a British turn of phrase maybe...?

# ? Mar 2, 2022 22:16

Farg: Nov 19, 2013

As in he dug his own grave, I hope?

# ? Mar 2, 2022 22:19

Inexplicable Humblebrag: Sep 20, 2003

it means he hung himself, i would guess

# ? Mar 2, 2022 22:21

exmachina: Mar 12, 2006; Look Closer

I have heard it used that way usually "I gave him enough rope and he hung himself" but if not that is the worst humblebrag post I have seen in this thread.

# ? Mar 2, 2022 22:21

Inexplicable Humblebrag: Sep 20, 2003

i was trying to be helpful!!!

# ? Mar 2, 2022 22:22

Sisal Two-Step: May 29, 2006; mom without jaw
dad without wife

i'm taking all the Ls now, sorry

Arsenic Lupin posted:

I think OP's issue is not so much "owl might drop the rings" as "owl might become overwhelmed by the lights and the people and the noise and injure somebody, possibly me."

It would take attention away from the bride!!!

# ? Mar 2, 2022 22:23

Cthulu Carl: Apr 16, 2006

Soylent Pudding posted:

AITA for trolling my (25F) team member (45M) at work and getting him fired?

I think he hung himself

This is loving disgusting.

You mean he HANGED himself... :rolleyes:

# ? Mar 2, 2022 22:27

hawowanlawow: Jul 27, 2009

Soylent Pudding posted:

AITA for trolling my (25F) team member (45M) at work and getting him fired?

op seems pretty annoying tho

# ? Mar 2, 2022 22:34

trickybiscuits: Jan 13, 2008; yospos

Soylent Pudding posted:

AITA for gifting my mom and her husband a book on cheating for their anniversary?

HA HA

Also the line "The morning before her anniversary day she came to my bed and tried to cuddle with me like before she left us but it made me angry like we can't go back in time and pretend it's how it was" is so spot-on. These parents- for some reason lately it's been all moms- would get so much farther if they acknowledged what a lovely thing they had done and dealt with that.

quote:

She always comes to my birthdays or big events like basketball finals and stuff. But she never does anything beyond that cause then it's got to involve her new family. Like, we can't go for ice cream cause then she's going to bring her daughters. Can't go to a theme park cause then she'll bring her entire family. Can't really hang out at all cause her family will need her.

This is so sad.

# ? Mar 2, 2022 22:38

Bonster: Mar 3, 2007; Keep rolling, rolling

exmachina posted:

I have heard it used that way usually "I gave him enough rope and he hung himself" but if not that is the worst humblebrag post I have seen in this thread.

Yeah. "gave himself enough to rope to hang himself", "he hung himself out to dry", it just means he caused his own misfortune.

I hope.

# ? Mar 2, 2022 22:41

trickybiscuits: Jan 13, 2008; yospos

Captain Hygiene posted:

I saw that one too, it sucks.

https://twitter.com/KalhanR/status/1491591229318090754

ENJOY

I couldn't even hear this and I wanted to die.

# ? Mar 2, 2022 22:43

Seth Pecksniff: May 27, 2004; can't believe shrek is fucking dead. rip to a real one.

Midnight Voyager posted:

uhhhhhh is that a British turn of phrase maybe...?

It means "he hung himself out to dry", not that he literally slipped the bonds of earth to touch the void

# ? Mar 2, 2022 22:44

Neito: Feb 18, 2009; 😌Finally, an avatar the describes my love of tech❤️‍💻, my love of anime💖🎎, and why I'll never see a real girl 🙆‍♀️naked😭.

It's definitely a turn of phrase.

And I agree. Dude is absolultely on the "finding out" side of loving around and finding out.

# ? Mar 2, 2022 22:44

A Festivus Miracle: Dec 19, 2012; I have come to discourse on the profound inequities of the American political system.

Soylent Pudding posted:

AITA for gifting my mom and her husband a book on cheating for their anniversary?

Jesus christ, this kid viciously owned his mother without even thinking about it. That was quite the rear end in a top hat move.

Buuuuut, OTH, the mother here exploded the family and instead of sitting down with her 16 year old son and explaining that unfortunately, she's a human too, she wanted to pretend all was swell. Also, the step-dad thinking his input is valuable or needed is dumb, and the kid should told him to gently caress right the gently caress off.

# ? Mar 2, 2022 22:48

Midnight Voyager: Jul 2, 2008; Lipstick Apathy

Trying to snuggle your 16 year old that you've barely seen for six years like he's still ten is also really just kinda weird. Not just pretending nothing went bad, but pretending even your kid is exactly like he was before everything changed.

# ? Mar 2, 2022 22:50

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# ? May 30, 2024 15:38

hawowanlawow: Jul 27, 2009

A Festivus Miracle posted:

Jesus christ, this kid viciously owned his mother without even thinking about it. That was quite the rear end in a top hat move.

Buuuuut, OTH, the mother here exploded the family and instead of sitting down with her 16 year old son and explaining that unfortunately, she's a human too, she wanted to pretend all was swell. Also, the step-dad thinking his input is valuable or needed is dumb, and the kid should told him to gently caress right the gently caress off.

yeah it's always funny when step dads think anyone gives a gently caress what they think

# ? Mar 2, 2022 22:52

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