r/relationships: I have nothing against this baby.

The Something Awful Forums > Main > General Bullshit > r/relationships: I have nothing against this baby.

Megillah Gorilla: Sep 22, 2003; If only all of life's problems could be solved by smoking a professor of ancient evil texts.; Bread Liar

CHP = clitoral hood piercing.

gently caress, why can't people define their acronyms, especially when it's a core part of the story.

Also, it should be fine to put right back in after the birth, surely?

# ? Mar 10, 2022 11:49

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# ? May 30, 2024 12:31

Megillah Gorilla: Sep 22, 2003; If only all of life's problems could be solved by smoking a professor of ancient evil texts.; Bread Liar

Sir Sidney Poitier posted:

Aren't blowers the ones with cylindrical blades?

I have a 750w blower from some ancient mainframe and whilst it's great for ventilating a whole house it is insanely noisy and so powerful that it'll pick up tiny bits of grit or dirt that are around it and fire them out the front. They sting.

That's what google gave me for the portable unit.

I like to think OP isn't even using the tubing, just holding the unit by the handle and flapping his cock and balls about at 2295 cubic feet per minute.

# ? Mar 10, 2022 11:50

Biplane: Jul 18, 2005

Serephina posted:

On one hand, lovely bedside manner and more from the nurse.

On the other hand, you do not need the 1:1 time of a highly trained professional to tell you what to do about your piercing. Go email your midwife or something.

I think wanting the doctors opinion about that specific piercing in her specific situation is extremely understandable?

# ? Mar 10, 2022 11:55

Boba Pearl: Dec 27, 2019; by Athanatos

yeah Idk if I was pushing out a water melon i'd want to know what to do about my gooch brooch.

# ? Mar 10, 2022 11:58

Biplane: Jul 18, 2005

"Gooch brooch" is a phrase I will carry with me to my dying day.

# ? Mar 10, 2022 12:03

teen witch: Oct 9, 2012

Boba Pearl posted:

yeah Idk if I was pushing out a water melon i'd want to know what to do about my gooch brooch.

*sighs as I make an appointment with my piercer*

# ? Mar 10, 2022 12:05

Serephina: Nov 8, 2005; 恐竜戦隊
ジュウレンジャー

Biplane posted:

I think wanting the doctors opinion about that specific piercing in her specific situation is extremely understandable?

I mean it'd be great to have a Ob/Gyn person weigh in on this, but I'm pretty sure such ~~tit&tat~~ err, minor questions are better fielded by the midwife. They're perfectly experienced with all the normal birthing stuff and doctors are often stretched thin, which was the nurse's poorly expressed point.

# ? Mar 10, 2022 12:14

Boba Pearl: Dec 27, 2019; by Athanatos

Biplane posted:

"Gooch brooch" is a phrase I will carry with me to my dying day.

I'm a modern day shakespeare, making up new words and phrases every day.

# ? Mar 10, 2022 12:15

hallo spacedog: Apr 3, 2007; this chaos is killing me
💫🐕🔪😱😱

There isn't always a midwife involved in the process. I did not have access to a midwife with my insurance provider, just nurses and doctors.

Edit- on that note the nurse tried to tell me that I need to take my septum piercing out to give birth which made no sense so I also waited for the doctor to come around who said it was fine.

# ? Mar 10, 2022 12:16

Pookah: Aug 21, 2008; 🪶Caw🪶

"Ah hell, my gooch brooch is snagged on my linge!"

# ? Mar 10, 2022 12:17

Boba Pearl: Dec 27, 2019; by Athanatos

when it's decorated it becomes your Broossy

# ? Mar 10, 2022 12:18

teen witch: Oct 9, 2012

AITA for throwing away my wife's waffle breakfast after she threw away my "hazardous" soup?

quote:

My wife (30, f), has an irrational fear of germs. She is a scientist, and think that qualifies her to justify her behavior. She constantly carries around a bottle of disinfectant, obsessively disinfects door handles. I�m sure the amount of chemicals I�m being exposed to from living with her are going to give me cancer but she always says she �dilutes� the bleach properly and it isn�t dangerous. She uses �special soap� to wash fruits and vegetables and doesn�t allow me to put produce straight from the shop on the �clean shelf� of the fridge. I can�t argue with her because every time I criticize something she does, she brings up �evidence�. I don�t believe scientists, they always get things wrong.

She never speaks angrily, but I wish she did. She is like a robot. She uses this calm tone and lists her evidence and says she�s sorry if it is bothering me, she�ll make sure to ventilate well, etc. but never considers getting therapy for her germophobia. Yesterday, I made fish soup at night (around 10pm) and left it on the stove till about midday today, when I was going to eat it. It was hot when I went to bed and so I wasn�t going to put it in the fridge hot. I was about to have lunch and was going to go use bathroom. My wife got up late today so she was going to have breakfast. Of course she found the pot of soup and asked how long it had been there as it was warm to touch. I said it was there since last night and went to the bathroom. When I came back she had thrown it down the toilet (we have 2).

I was really mad at her and asked why she did that, she said it was very dangerous to eat this soup as it contained fish and was left outside in a �warm room� for a whole night. I told her I was going to reheat it so it didn�t matter and she, again, with her calm robot voice said this didn�t matter because many �toxins� made by bacteria were not destroyed by heating. This is of course ridiculous. She said some bacteria cells survived and something about a type of bacteria called sirius. She said she was concerned for me and she couldn�t let me eat it and get very sick. She said she was sorry to throw out my lunch and asked if she could order or make something else for me. She said she could make the same soup fresh in ten minutes (it is fast to make). I ignored her. She kept justifying her actions to me and I ignored her so she went back to making her breakfast, waffles and yoghurt. She then went to get something from another room and while she was out I threw her food in the trash.

When she came back I told her I threw out her food because it was unsafe as she had left it out for more than three minutes. She was hurt and sighed. I walked out and left. I do feel maybe I overdid it with throwing away her waffles as revenge, but what she did was wrong and she did ruin my lunch so at the time I thought it was fair.

AITA?

# ? Mar 10, 2022 12:48

ClamdestineBoyster: Aug 15, 2015; Can't post for 10 years!

teen witch posted:

AITA for throwing away my wife's waffle breakfast after she threw away my "hazardous" soup?

Yeah yata, these are two totally different things these bozos did there. :downs:

# ? Mar 10, 2022 13:04

Boba Pearl: Dec 27, 2019; by Athanatos

teen witch posted:

AITA for throwing away my wife's waffle breakfast after she threw away my "hazardous" soup?

what a whiny stupid piece of poo poo, how do you marry a scientist, and then believe that she doesn't know anything? God that's infuriating.

# ? Mar 10, 2022 13:07

Ghost Leviathan: Mar 2, 2017; Exploration is ill-advised.

Boba Pearl posted:

what a whiny stupid piece of poo poo, how do you marry a scientist, and then believe that she doesn't know anything? God that's infuriating.

anti-intellectualism is the norm in the western world

# ? Mar 10, 2022 13:09

Kuiperdolin: Sep 5, 2011; to ride eternal, shiny and chrome

THUNDERDOME LOSER 2022

I'm a scientist too and I leave food on the stove overnight all the time, it's fine. Crazy germaphobe scold.

# ? Mar 10, 2022 13:19

Pigsfeet on Rye: Oct 22, 2008; I'm meat on the hoof

Evil Willow posted:

A bit more info provided in the r/relationship_advice post!

Boyfriend is mad that I won�t pay for gas, advice?

# ? Mar 10, 2022 13:26

Cythereal: Nov 8, 2009; I love the potoo,
and the potoo loves you.

Boba Pearl posted:

what a whiny stupid piece of poo poo, how do you marry a scientist, and then believe that she doesn't know anything? God that's infuriating.

Smart people can be astonishingly stupid and believe their expertise in one narrow area qualifies them as an expert on anything and everything under the sun.

Not saying that's the case here, but it's remarkably prevalent in general.

# ? Mar 10, 2022 13:29

massive spider: Dec 6, 2006

quote:

She constantly carries around a bottle of disinfectant, obsessively disinfects door handles.

I am very curious if this apparent peculiarity in the wifes behaviour started around early 2020.

# ? Mar 10, 2022 13:34

AnoHito: May 8, 2014

Kuiperdolin posted:

I'm a scientist too and I leave food on the stove overnight all the time, it's fine. Crazy germaphobe scold.

There are some things you might be able to get away with leaving out overnight. A goddam fish soup is not one of them. Especially since he didn't even get to it first thing in the morning or anything, he waited until midday.

I feel like I'm getting second-hand food poisoning just thinking about it.

# ? Mar 10, 2022 13:36

DACK FAYDEN: Feb 25, 2013; Bear Witness

massive spider posted:

I am very curious if this apparent peculiarity in the wifes behaviour started around early 2020.

hey now, covid doesn't actually spread that way, keep up scientist wife

# ? Mar 10, 2022 13:38

kimbo305: Jun 9, 2007; actually, yeah, I am a little mad

Biplane posted:

"Gooch brooch" is a phrase I will carry with me to my dying day.

Are you pronouncing it gooch broach or are you pronouncing it incorrectly?

# ? Mar 10, 2022 13:38

Boba Pearl: Dec 27, 2019; by Athanatos

kimbo305 posted:

Are you pronouncing it gooch broach or are you pronouncing it incorrectly?

google says both pronunciations are correct! :eng101:

# ? Mar 10, 2022 13:44

mobby_6kl: Aug 9, 2009; by Fluffdaddy

Megillah Gorilla posted:

CHP = clitoral hood piercing.

gently caress, why can't people define their acronyms, especially when it's a core part of the story.

Also, it should be fine to put right back in after the birth, surely?

Could also be California Highway Patrol

# ? Mar 10, 2022 13:47

Pookah: Aug 21, 2008; 🪶Caw🪶

You're obviously not guaranteed to get food poisoning after leaving food out overnight, but the result if you DO get it are severe enough to make putting that stuff in the fridge a requirement imo.
My dad was fed gone-off fish when he was a kid in boarding school, and he literally couldn't eat fish again until he was well into his 40s, it made him gag every time.
He still leaves food overnight so lol.

# ? Mar 10, 2022 13:48

teen witch: Oct 9, 2012

Boba Pearl posted:

google says both pronunciations are correct!

Ok but now I�m singing the goof troop intro with the needful

Gooch brooch! A-zubbadi-bop-abba-do-bow (yeah)

# ? Mar 10, 2022 13:55

teen witch: Oct 9, 2012

Wait no

New brooch goochin

# ? Mar 10, 2022 13:55

8one6: May 20, 2012; When in doubt, err on the side of Awesome!

teen witch posted:

AITA for throwing away my wife's waffle breakfast after she threw away my "hazardous" soup?

I'm glad these two people are married to each other so no one else accidentally marries either of them.

# ? Mar 10, 2022 13:57

StrangersInTheNight: Dec 31, 2007; ABSOLUTE FUCKING GUDGEON

After reading up how quickly certain food becomes rotten and unsafe when left out at room temperature because I was being a knucklehead about it and my partner chided me, that soup was not safe. Especially if it was still warm/hot, that just makes it worse not safer.

Even if you think the two-hour rule is too conservative, overnight and warm is loving foul.

Like, she might have some OCD or something but she wasn't wrong about the soup, he's going to kill himself doing that poo poo.

# ? Mar 10, 2022 14:07

massive spider: Dec 6, 2006

I mean evidence that the wife is the crazy one:

Washes produce (you should), doesn't put unwashed produce with the washed

Disinfects doorknobs "obsessively". Ok a bit much, but consider the source

Wont allow perfectly good room temperature overnight fish soup

Argues in a calm, level tone

Supports her claims with :airquote:

""""""evidence""""" :airquote:

# ? Mar 10, 2022 14:12

Soylent Pudding: Jun 22, 2007; We've got people!

AITA for my comment about my SIL�s divorce?

quote:

So me (26M) and my girlfriend Rachel (27F) have been dating 2.5 years. We live together and have for the past year. So I don�t really gently caress with her sister Ashley (31F) at all. Like I�ll let her in the house whenever she comes over and give her a little wave. But that�s it is. The reason is that I don�t think she�s a good person. When we met she was with her longtime BF and at that point husband. They had been married for 4 years. I liked her husband and he was one of the few guys my age at the family events. Well about 2 years ago Ashley left her husband for an older rich guy with two kids. Didn�t even talk to her husband. She left divorce papers on the bed. I was the one who had to show up to make sure he was okay. To make matters worse the guy was married. So she moved right in after the guy left his wife and kids. My girlfriend was irate. And didn�t speak to her sister for almost a year. But eventually they started having a relationship again. But my Gf knows I didn�t like her sister and never forced us to connect after. I didn�t attend the second wedding.

Another reason I don�t like her sister is that she�s lazy and entitled. She�s attractive and has always gotten by on her looks. Even claiming that she only went to college for her �mrs degree�. She has never had a job. So now to my comment. I came home yesterday to Rachel and her sister on the couch. Ashley was hysterical and hyperventilating. I asked what was wrong. Rachel walked over to me and told me what happened. Basically Ashley showed up to her house and she was locked out. Her husband sent her a text that he was in love with someone else. She had moved in. And all of Ashley things along with the divorce papers were at an apartment. That he would pay the lease for a year but they were done. I said �oh well at least the kids won�t hate you anymore�. Ashley always complained about her step kids hating her. I then went back to our room to change. When I came back out to make food. Ashley asked me �is that really all you have to say�� I said �yep� and went about making a sandwich. When I looked up Ashley was staring at me. And I said this exactly �what do you want Ashley, do you want me to feel bad for you, it�s called karma. Just make sure the next one is single�. And I walked back to my room. Ever since my girlfriend has been upset with me. She said that she understands I don�t like her sister. But I could have faked it for a minute. I said that she knows I�m not good at faking. And her sister got what has been coming to her for a long time. She�s been doing lovely things to people since HS. But she is never held accountable so karma happened. AITA?

# ? Mar 10, 2022 14:12

StrangersInTheNight: Dec 31, 2007; ABSOLUTE FUCKING GUDGEON

I'm still stuck in fish soup man's insistence that the soup was kept warm so it was ok

Does that guy think that what makes food go bad is cooling it, bad if it's is just left warm indefinitely it's safe forever???

I need to know more about how he thinks this works

EDIT: Oh God I thought the doorknob thing was probably a COVID thing too, but just had the realization that I bet you she's washing doorknobs because she caught him doing something gross like pooping or touching trash and not washing his hands because he insists it's not necessary bc bro doesn't believe in germ theory

StrangersInTheNight fucked around with this message at 14:20 on Mar 10, 2022

# ? Mar 10, 2022 14:18

kimbo305: Jun 9, 2007; actually, yeah, I am a little mad

Boba Pearl posted:

google says both pronunciations are correct!

Yeah, the oochers have infiltrated all levels of society :tinfoil:

# ? Mar 10, 2022 14:23

Cowslips Warren: Oct 29, 2005; What use had they for tricks and cunning, living in the enemy's warren and paying his price?; Grimey Drawer

When I make a delivery at work, people have to use their fingers to electronically sign on my device. I sanitize the poo poo out of the screen after every signature. And people stare, like they can't believe I spray alcohol water where they just put their grubby hands.

poo poo, one dude sneezed on my device, and looked like I poo poo on his shoes when I sprayed the device clean in front of him.

I didn't do this poo poo pre covid unless someone clearly had filthy hands, but I am amazed I didn't get sick more often from having this germbed strapped to my side.

# ? Mar 10, 2022 14:26

Kuiperdolin: Sep 5, 2011; to ride eternal, shiny and chrome

THUNDERDOME LOSER 2022

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Perpetual_stew

# ? Mar 10, 2022 14:40

Soylent Pudding: Jun 22, 2007; We've got people!

Porn Divorce in the USA!

quote:

We're in Massachusetts at the moment, but have lived all over the States.

My husband & I went into business together about fifteen years ago, creating & distributing pornography from our home. This was before the OnlyFans model of independent porn distribution, but the content was the same: Stuff featuring me, stuff featuring my spouse, stuff featuring both of us together, and sometimes with others. When including others, we had the participants sign a release, so no worries there.

The content is fairly tame by modern reddit standards. Nothing wild or illegal. Just a fairly lucrative hustle we sort of drifted into at the right time.

Two years ago, we hit some bad luck. I became ill, and my partner was injured. The coincidence of this happening at pretty much the same time kind of wrecked our lives, just in time for pandemic lockdowns to make things worse. So we folded up shop, packed our belongings, and moved across the country to live nearer my partner's parents.

Since moving out here, our relationship has ceased to work to our mutual satisfaction, and we're very likely heading towards divorce.

The reason I'm reaching out here is because I don't know how to proceed re: our library of pornographic videos. I'd like to be able to continue to sell our content. We spent years creating what is fairly evergreen footage, and have hundreds of clips that more than sustained us for over a decade. We've been living off of the associated savings since we've been out here, so while not independently wealthy, we're also not talking about trivial value.

We're both in bad physical shape now (sick & injured), and to me it makes all the sense in the world to set up shop and let our previous work continue to work for us while we get back on our feet, medically and mentally. My partner disagrees, and no longer wants the content distributed. Like many of you have already guessed, though, most of the content is already pirated and freely available online, so that makes it doubly frustrating that my hands are being tied when it comes to profiting from our work.

If it was any other kind of shared asset, I'd figure on splitting the continued proceeds, selling the asset to someone who will use it (and splitting the proceeds between us), or allowing my partner to buy me out. But since it's adult content, and not easy to put a monetary value on, I don't know if the rules are different.

I can't help but fear the value of our catalog is rapidly dropping as major alternatives continue to pop up. I'd like to make the most of it while possible, if possible.

I just know that I put a lot of time and effort into something that my husband no longer wants me to be able to benefit from, and that seems sketchy, unfair, and wrong. But what's the law have to say about it? I assume this sort of thing will come up quite a lot as OnlyFans and the like continue to democratize the porn industry.

For what it's worth, we produced most of the content in California, but now live in Massachusetts.

tl;dr husband and I are divorcing, and have to split up our assets, including commercial pornography we produced and own together. Can I avoid being robbed of my commercial catalog? Being hosed out of money is completely antithetical to the business we started.

# ? Mar 10, 2022 14:41

Soul Dentist: Mar 17, 2009

PancakeTransmission posted:

I've had this same thing before though. I rarely raise my voice, so when I do (usually a slight inflection), people interpret it as me being really angry and get upset as if I'm yelling, when I'm barely mad.

My first gf had a friend come with her when she was moving out (apparently she was worried I'd attack her), and I was just confused because I had no emotions either way. I didn't give a poo poo that she wanted to break up (in hindsight, realising I'm aromantic or on the spectrum) - I was just confused as to where it came from (until I later found out she was reading my emails but that's more for E/N)

What in the world. I think an ex breaking up with you and needing protection because of something she read in your email, and you not caring at all, actually fits right in here.

Also it's pronounced goach broach

# ? Mar 10, 2022 14:49

DACK FAYDEN: Feb 25, 2013; Bear Witness

StrangersInTheNight posted:

I'm still stuck in fish soup man's insistence that the soup was kept warm so it was ok

Does that guy think that what makes food go bad is cooling it, bad if it's is just left warm indefinitely it's safe forever???

I need to know more about how he thinks this works

Yes. One hundred percent. The food is supposed to be warm, it's still warm, ergo it's still fresh, ergo it's still good. Or something similarly childish.

# ? Mar 10, 2022 14:51

ilmucche: Mar 16, 2016; What did you say the strategy was?

Soylent Pudding posted:

AITA for my comment about my SIL’s divorce?

If they'll cheat on someone else to be with you they'll cheat on you to be with someone else

Gets even worse for leaving their spouse and kids

# ? Mar 10, 2022 15:00

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# ? May 30, 2024 12:31

Dr. Stab: Sep 12, 2010; 👨🏻‍⚕️🩺🔪🙀😱🙀

Megillah Gorilla posted:

CHP = clitoral hood piercing.

gently caress, why can't people define their acronyms, especially when it's a core part of the story.

Also, it should be fine to put right back in after the birth, surely?

The question was about whether it was okay to wear a retainer while the jewelry was out so the piercing wouldn't close.

# ? Mar 10, 2022 15:00

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