Soylent Pudding posted:

AITA for forbidding my brother bringing his gf in our family events because my husband doesn't like it?

Soylent Pudding posted:

AITA for forbidding my brother bringing his gf in our family events because my husband doesn't like it?

quote:

My husband is an extremely religious and traditional guy

quote:

Before we left he only told my brother "you must feel proud for acting like a [c-word]"

Captain Hygiene posted:

Olive Branch posted:

Man, is my Hakuna Matata parody last page just chopped liver?

hawowanlawow posted:

I'm gonna need some quotes from the scripture on this one

pentyne posted:

The question is how much time the friend spends complaining about her appearance wanting reassurances.

I think telling someone to exercise more and start up a serious make-up regimen is a hilariously poor choice but if you deal with someone who is constantly insisting they are ugly, refusing compliments, and also frequently bringing up the topic for whatever reason, some hard truths are better then empty platitudes.

poo poo, I'd go so far as telling her that constantly whining about being unattractive is probably the no 1 thing that makes people find her unattractive.

The "meats distributed" line is weird enough that the OP is still an rear end in a top hat though.

Edgar Allan Pwned posted:

My mother told me you wear white to signal your virginity in marriage, and obvs it just stuck around as society got more modern.

SMEGMA_MAIL posted:

JFC everyone but the OP and the neighbor need to go to prison or the sun

quote:

TW: Miscarriage

I (27f) and my husband (23m) got married two years ago. I generally get along with his family pretty well and he tries to get along with my family.

My family is not super close. We were upperclass. My siblings are ten years plus older than me and my parents raised me by handing me a credit card and letting me loose. My parents divorced when I was in high school and they got better after that and we actually formed a relationship. I love my parents but it is like I’m an only child with siblings. I have no attachment to my siblings at all. We get together for every Christmas and maybe Thanksgiving. That’s the most I see my family.

My husbands family is the exact opposite they are super close. He was raised where his family get together for everything. Extended family. Grandparents, great aunts and uncles, all of their kids and so on. Every minor holiday. Every birthday. Everything. It was a big shock going in.

It took about a year of dating before I got comfortable around his family. One of his cousins said I came off stuck up because I “wore nice clothes and didn’t talk much.” But once I got comfortable I opened up and joined conversations and I blended in fairly well.

My husband and I have had trouble with pregnancy. We have had one ectopic pregnancy that made me lose a Fallopian Tube and we have had 5 miscarriages all in the last 3 years. One was a 2nd trimester miscarriage. So we had already announced and had to explain to everyone we lost the baby. We have been pretty open with our struggles.

His extended family constantly asks if we’re going to try again or when we are going to have kids. And I always politely say we’re trying but I’m sick of it. I’ve talked to my MIL and husband (both of whom are great) and they said they would talk to them and get them to stop.

Here’s where I might be the rear end in a top hat. At family dinner last week. I was sitting around with all of his aunts and female cousins and they were just gossiping and chatting. When his great aunt looked at me and asked when we plan on “adding more babies to the family.” And I looked her dead in the eye and said “when my uterus decides to stop ejecting them prematurely.”

She looked at me stunned and I stood up and walked out of the room. I had a few people come up to me and tell me I was rude and that was uncalled for. That she’s older (60 something) and she just doesn’t know any better.

I don’t think what I said was wrong and don’t want to apologize. I mean I could have worded it better but if they want to get into business I feel is personal then why not give them the whole truth.

So Reddit. Should I apologize? AITA?

Edited to add TW

Soylent Pudding posted:

AITA for snapping at my husbands aunt when she asked when I’ll have kids?

That she’s older (60 something) and she just doesn’t know any better.

Soylent Pudding posted:

AITA for snapping at my husbands aunt when she asked when I’ll have kids?

Johnny Truant posted:

r/relationships: but her meats are well distributed

quote:

Apparently I can't use the word so I'll just say 'K'. If in doubt just google 'Jewish slur K'.

I'm Jewish. My son looks like a mix of both myself and my boyfriend IMO but MIL, on meeting her first ever grandchild for the first time ever, said it was a shame he came out a K. The second I heard that I asked her to leave. Boyfriend said she didn't say K, she said tyke, which rhymes with K and is British slang for a small child (we're British), and MIL agreed with him, but MIL saying it was a shame he came out a tyke makes no sense, and when I pointed that out MIL said that she said she 'knew he'd be a tyke'. Boyfriend then repeated that, and continued to repeat that, until I asked both MIL and Boyfriend to leave. He's now at his place and is texting me, repeating MIL's story.

I admit K and tyke sound similar, but there's no way I misheard 'knew he'd be a' as 'a shame he came out a', and even with the fact tyke means cheeky, my son was sleeping and not doing anything remotely cheeky, and saying it was a shame he came out a small child makes no sense. This is also not the only time I've felt MIL was being antisemitic and Boyfriend has insisted she wasn't and I've misunderstood/misinterpreted/misheard, and I'm getting pretty tired of him insisting that I'm wrong about her being antisemitic. I cannot and will not let my son grow up around antisemitism but nothing can be resolved unless she is willing to admit what she said and talk it out, which she won't, and Boyfriend is siding with MIL when we're meant to be a team here, which is not helping.

What should I do?

Edit RE the other times I thought MIL was antisemitic: She's refused to eat things I've cooked because she doesn't eat kosher/Jewish food. I've made things like fish and chips before now so she couldn't claim it was Jewish and she's still refused on the basis that she doesn't eat kosher food. My brother told her his Hebrew name and she called it gibberish and she calls any uses of Hebrew (or occasional Yiddish) gibberish. I get a healthy natural tan in summer due to my heritage and she's said my fake tanning makes me too dark and asked where I'm 'really' from (she did not find England an acceptable answer). My boyfriend has defended all of this.

quote:

first post MIL called my son the K slur (google K slur Jewish if in doubt) and when I called MIL out, both MIL and Boyfriend denied it, claiming she said something else.

I sat Boyfriend down the day after I made my post, and told him I know what I heard and I wasn't going to let him and his mother manipulate me into thinking I heard something different. He then said that she didn't mean to call me that but she'd never say it about our son, so to the person who suggested that MIL actually said it was a "shame he came out of a K", as opposed to "shame he came out a K", which is what I thought she said, you were right. MIL wasn't calling my son a slur, she was calling me a slur, which I then realised my boyfriend was using as a defence of his mother.

I asked him if he was ever going to stand up for me or our son against a woman who was so clearly an antisemite, and he said his mother isn't an antisemite, and even if she was, which she isn't, our son isn't Jewish so it's not like she'd be antisemitic to him, and he personally wasn't antisemitic either. I told him that I have a duty of care to both myself and our Jewish son, so I would uphold the custody agreement we already have (he gets 1 weekend a month) and I'd civilly co-parent for the sake of our child, but I had no interest in pursuing our relationship further, and asked him to leave.

He spent the next few days trying to get me to reconsider but I haven't heard from him at all in the last 48 hours, so I think he's accepted my choice. According to the schedule, he's meant to have our son this weekend, but I've not heard from him about this as of right now and I appear to be blocked. I also got a text from MIL letting me know she's going for grandparent rights and visitation, which has to be an empty threat as a 2 minute google has already confirmed that she won't get it, but I'll check with a lawyer ASAP just to reassure myself.

quote:

Spineless cunts these people. I am sorry for that situation, I believe you absolutely did the right thing.

OP posted:

oval office implies warmth and depth, but thank you. I feel like I did the right thing, which is strange because I was expecting to be doubting myself after this, but I'm just not. I feel like I did the right thing.

Edgar Allan Pwned posted:

My mother told me you wear white to signal your virginity in marriage, and obvs it just stuck around as society got more modern. I mentioned it to male coworkers and they didn't know the white color was symbolic. It seems a little weird to dress a kid in white because aren't they messy? I know it's taboo to wear white and not be the bride but then getting upset at children seems like much.

Clearly brides need to keep pigs blood on hand just in case anyone wears white

Soylent Pudding posted:

AITA for forbidding my brother bringing his gf in our family events because my husband doesn't like it?

quote:

My husband suggested we start hosting family events in our house in the future. Especially events like Easter, Xmas or thanksgiving. So none of that happens again and we can be in control of the guest list

Cowslips Warren posted:

Last year I was at work, driving to my next delivery stop, and a tire blew out when I was doing about 60 on the highway. I managed to get off the highway safely, and when I called my dispatch to let them know what happened, my dispatch agent said that he couldn't take any of my stops off me, we were too busy, and then just dead air.

When I called the tow truck, the first thing the dispatch there asked was, "Are you okay, in a safe place?"

When I called my boss, I let her know about the rear end in a top hat our dispatcher had been, and her reply was, "Well, are you okay? Did he need to ask?"

Edgar Allan Pwned posted:

My mother told me you wear white to signal your virginity in marriage, and obvs it just stuck around as society got more modern. I mentioned it to male coworkers and they didn't know the white color was symbolic. It seems a little weird to dress a kid in white because aren't they messy? I know it's taboo to wear white and not be the bride but then getting upset at children seems like much.

Clearly brides need to keep pigs blood on hand just in case anyone wears white

quote:

So many years ago, when I was going through job burnout, I took up the hobby of refinishing wood furniture. Over the years, I've amassed a fair amount of skill and specialty tools to achieve some outstanding results. About six months ago, a friend of mine was throwing away an old dresser that he and his wife felt (more the wife's decision than his) was cluttering up their basement (which they had renovated during the quarantine). I took the dresser off the curb and over the past several months, have taken it apart, cleaned off the many layers of paint and restored it back to original condition. The mahogany/oak wood responded beautifully to my work and the dresser looks amazing. I created custom nickel-plated hardware for the drawer pulls and updated the drawer mechanisms.

Last week, my friend and his wife were visiting and I showed them the restored dresser. The wife fell in love with the results and asked when I was going to bring it to their house, as it would "look great in their new guest bedroom". I told them how much it would cost if they wanted to buy it, as I had put in a fair amount of time and material restoring it. The wife, rather shrilly, reminded me that it was originally theirs and that if I didn't give it to them, it was stealing and she would call the police. Heated words were said back and forth (my friend kept quiet during the entire exchange) and I ended up asking them to leave.

AITA for not giving them the dresser without any compensation in return? Do I eat the cost and give it back to save my friendship?

Captain Hygiene posted:

AITA for not giving back the dresser I refinished?

Deep down I am convinced the friends are the parents of that person who turned down some free furniture and then asked to be Venmo'd the $700 that their roommate sold it for

Edgar Allan Pwned posted:

My mother told me you wear white to signal your virginity in marriage, and obvs it just stuck around as society got more modern. I mentioned it to male coworkers and they didn't know the white color was symbolic. It seems a little weird to dress a kid in white because aren't they messy? I know it's taboo to wear white and not be the bride but then getting upset at children seems like much.

Clearly brides need to keep pigs blood on hand just in case anyone wears white

DemoneeHo posted:

MIL just called my kid the K slur (Jewish). Boyfriend insists she said 'tyke'. I know what I heard.

our son isn't Jewish

limp_cheese posted:

Correct me if I'm wrong but its my understanding that Jewish law explicitly states being Jewish by blood is passed down through the mother. So even if the son renounces it later in life he is still considered Jewish by blood.

I seem to remember this was a big deal in Israel when it comes to who is actually "Jewish".

DemoneeHo posted:

MIL just called my kid the K slur (Jewish). Boyfriend insists she said 'tyke'. I know what I heard.

UPDATE: MIL just called my kid the K slur (Jewish). Boyfriend insists she said 'tyke'. I know what I heard.

therattle posted:

You are correct.

Captain Hygiene posted:

AITA for not giving back the dresser I refinished?

Deep down I am convinced the friends are the parents of that person who turned down some free furniture and then asked to be Venmo'd the $700 that their roommate sold it for

Mr. Lobe posted:

I wonder if the woman has ever heard the term "theft of services" before.

quote:

How delusional is this guy? Please inform him that his son is indeed Jewish, seeing as how his mother is Jewish.

OP posted:

I did tell him that. He doesn't believe it because we agreed to raise our son with both my Jewish and his Catholic faith and let our son decide later. I told him that doesn't stop our son being ethnically Jewish, or Jewish by descent, but ex insisted that it did.

Absurd Alhazred posted:

I don't think OP is going to let the gentile father, or his more clearly antisemitic mother, dictate whether or not her son is Jewish, so I wouldn't worry about it.

Parsley posted:

Are grandparents rights ever threatened by a grandparent that isn't actually using it as a weird power-act against the very mother and child they quite pointedly despise?

limp_cheese posted:

Correct me if I'm wrong but its my understanding that Jewish law explicitly states being Jewish by blood is passed down through the mother. So even if the son renounces it later in life he is still considered Jewish by blood.

I seem to remember this was a big deal in Israel when it comes to who is actually "Jewish".

quote:

My sister(34F) and nephew(7M) came from Utah to Cali to visit me and my bf. They said they wanted to see some national parks so we drove to Death Valley and was going to do some hiking. We hiked for a few hours and my nephew was exploring around. I wasn’t watching him until he came over and showed my sister a few rocks. I went to see what he found and he found some fossils with preserved clams looking things inside. I told him it has illegal to remove fossils from the park and told him to put it back where he found them. He started to get upset saying he found them so he should be able to keep them. She kept saying he was into fossils and wanted to keep them as souvenirs. My sister defended him saying it wasn’t a big deal and no one would find out and I thought it was insane she wouldn’t correct him but my sister always babied my nephew because he the only child that survived from 4 pregnancies. I told her he has to put it back or we aren’t leaving and she got angry and started arguing that it wasn’t a big deal. We got back to the car and I got in and locked the doors telling my nephew we are staying here until he puts things back. He started crying and my sister hugged him and tried to console him. My sister then kicked my car repeatedly and yelled and screamed at me though the car. After 30 min he gave up and put the fossils back on the ground. I let them in and my sister spent the rest of the car ride saying I don’t have kids so I don’t understand and how a few missing rocks wouldn’t make any difference so I was overreacting.

Sisal Two-Step posted:

AITA for not letting my sister and nephew into my car?

Park rangers don't gently caress around with people taking poo poo out of the parks. NTA.

Ravenfood posted:

Also the boyfriends from the "tyke" story sounds like a real loving keeper.