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Dabir
Nov 10, 2012

Louise Fletcher is great. You can feel the outraged self-righteousness in everything she says.

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Blistex
Oct 30, 2003

Macho Business
Donkey Wrestler

Endless Trash posted:

Somehow Dukat has returned

Arc Hammer
Mar 4, 2013

Got any deathsticks?

StashAugustine posted:

Yeah I honestly don't really want them to touch DS9 at this point, Lower Decks occasionally acknowledging it exists is fine

The throwaway gag where Mariner had to deal with a Wolf 359 truther who was convinced the Dominion War didn't happen and changelings didn't exist was funny.

naem
May 29, 2011

chaosbreather posted:

VO: TO SOME THE FUTURE IS A MYSTERY
(bwaaaaaam) we see tumbling stars
VO: BUT THERE'S A PLAN
(bwaaaamm) we see rising spires
VO: OF THE PROPHETS
(record scratch) INT: QUARK's bar. We see QUARK, recast as a young Black man wearing Beats headphones that kind of look like Ferengi ears and a nike shirt with a tie, in the middle of some kind of deal.
BLACK QUARK: (turning) Yo! Did someone say profits?
EXT - outside of a space station that looks like DS9 but much spikier
INT - hallway
TWO MEN are backing away, terrified from a YOUNG LEOPARD WOMAN in Starfleet uniform. The commbadge has another notch in it for some reason.
MAN 1: Watch out man! That's a Trill! Don't let her get you.
MAN 2: Nooo!
The YOUNG LEOPARD WOMAN leaps on MAN 2 and frenches the man hard. She immediately dies. Then MAN 2 grows LEOPARD FUR all over his body and immediately restrains MAN 1.
LEOPARD MAN touches Starfleet commbade.
LEOPARD MAN: Sisko, mission accomplished.
SISKO: (on commbade) Who is this?
LEOPARD MAN: (raises a finger, checks wallet, pulls out CRIMINAL IDENTIFICATION CARD, and reads it) Leonard... Dax.

INT- MENACING CHAMBER
BLACK QUARK: You gotta hustle to survive on the streets... of space! The first rule of getting stuff is die motherfucker!
(BLACK QUARK shoots a small Bajoran urchin)
URCHIN: Yew can't kill me, Black Quark! (dramatic orchestra rise) Because moi Naaayme is.... Gul Dukat, I is!!! (orchestra sting)
BLACK QUARK: Who?
Cut to series of EXPLOSION, EXPLOSIONS and loving

VO: A place LEGENDS

EXT: someone in a space suit is space-spraying something on to metal. we see what's he's painting: NX-74205-B – USS DEFIANT.
REVERSE SHOT. The painter is SISKO.

VO: are REBORN

SISKO: poo poo yeah!

We slowly pan up, he's been writing on a massive BORG CUBE.

CUT to massive space battle

CUT to even more massive space battle
Cut to DARK CAVE
OLD WORF (who looks like complete garbage as a nutrek klingon) trying to Bat'leth a weird looking alien with a flat head.
OLD WORF: Watch out, Chief!
Another flat head alien shoots OLD FAT O'BRIEN, freezing him in place somehow
OLD WORF: (slaps commbadge) Captain! The Prophets got O'Brian with their time cannons!
SISKO: (over commbadge) we have a backup.
A transporter beam energises right next to OLD FAT O'BRIEN, and it's a barely legal Japanese porn star wearing almost nothing but a commbadge.
OLD WORF: Admiral!
ADMIRAL MOLLY O'BRIEN: I'll avenge you, Daddy! For the glory of Starfleet! (She pulls out a STARFLEET LIGHTSABER) Let's gently caress some profit rear end!
OLD WORF: Aye, sir! Today is a good day to die!

VO: DEEP

CUT to explosion

VO: SPACE

CUT to explosion

VO: TEN

INT – QUARK'S BAR
BLACK QUARK: I liked you better when you were young.
OLD ODO: I liked you better when you were Jewish.

We pan over slightly.
JAR JAR BINKS: Mesa likes everyone!
QUARK & ODO: Shut up, Kira.

I still wouldn’t pay for Paramonut © Pluts ®™️

Animal-Mother
Feb 14, 2012

RABBIT RABBIT
RABBIT RABBIT
Were they loving in Cetacean Ops in the episode where they're all horny?

kdrudy
Sep 19, 2009

Animal-Mother posted:

Were they loving in Cetacean Ops in the episode where they're all horny?



Dolphins are always horny so it was business as usual.

Hollismason
Jun 30, 2007
An alright dude.
I hope that we see Cetacean ops in Lower Decks eventually or in the new Picard series. It needs to happen.

Brawnfire
Jul 13, 2004

🎧Listen to Cylindricule!🎵
https://linktr.ee/Cylindricule

We did see it in Lower Decks



Brawnfire fucked around with this message at 02:56 on Apr 7, 2022

Endless Trash
Aug 12, 2007


Brawnfire posted:

We did see it in Lower Decks





God I love that show

MikeJF
Dec 20, 2003




They confirmed that Matt and Kimolu are going to be recurring in season 3.

gimme the GOD DAMN candy
Jul 1, 2007
there was basically no chance that they wouldn't use cetacean ops in that show.

Brawnfire
Jul 13, 2004

🎧Listen to Cylindricule!🎵
https://linktr.ee/Cylindricule

I like how it looks like SeaWorld, like people would gather around on the balconies for a dolphin show while someone in a tight Federation swim uniform tosses fish to them.

Cthulu Carl
Apr 16, 2006

Brawnfire posted:

We did see it in Lower Decks





Weird, everywhere else, the rocks are inside the consoles...

Arc Hammer
Mar 4, 2013

Got any deathsticks?
I threw on Improbable Cause tonight and oh my god this episode is full to the brim with amazing Garak and Odo quotes. I kind of wish Odo's Cardassian contact made more appearances but his one off showing was certainly memorable.

Prurient Squid
Jul 21, 2008

Tiddy cat Buddha improving your day.

Hollismason posted:

Riker gets cock blocked by the Crystaline Entity in this episode of Star Trek the horniest journey

This reminds me of the scene in Spaceballs where a viewscreen appears when a guy's having a piss. Just an oblique lateral connection.

Endless Trash
Aug 12, 2007


Data runs over Captain Picard with an SUV, Agnes and the Borg Queen sing Pat Benatar, and lots of dead fetuses! All that and nothing else really on this week’s episode of Star Trak Picard!

Jose Oquendo
Jun 20, 2004

Star Trek: The Motion Picture is a boring movie

Endless Trash posted:

Data runs over Captain Picard with an SUV, Agnes and the Borg Queen sing Pat Benatar, and lots of dead fetuses! All that and nothing else really on this week’s episode of Star Trak Picard!

That musical number was so loving bad and it didn’t fit or make any loving sense.

I think the ONLY good part of the episode is when Picard had a chance to be Picard and give astronaut lady a motivational speech.

naem
May 29, 2011

hi yes this is a very good thread

Endless Trash
Aug 12, 2007


Jose Oquendo posted:

That musical number was so loving bad and it didn’t fit or make any loving sense.

I think the ONLY good part of the episode is when Picard had a chance to be Picard and give astronaut lady a motivational speech.
Borg Queen’s mind gives Agnes super strength. Why? Because shut up that’s why.

bltzn
Oct 26, 2020

For the record I do not have a foot fetish.
nanomachinesprobes, son

infernal machines
Oct 11, 2012

we monitor many frequencies. we listen always. came a voice, out of the babel of tongues, speaking to us. it played us a mighty dub.
I remember when Borg nanoprobes meant something. They meant you had to be mercy killed the minute they touched you. If you were lucky, the guy behind the phaser rifle was your captain, the man who himself had been assimilated and since recovered just six years previous.

Automatic Slim
Jul 1, 2007

infernal machines posted:

I remember when Borg nanoprobes meant something. They meant you had to be mercy killed the minute they touched you. If you were lucky, the guy behind the phaser rifle was your captain, the man who himself had been assimilated and since recovered just six years previous.

Borgs and their nanoprobes lost any meaning since Voyager. Remember when Janeway, Bellana, and Tuvok got assimilated to go under cover in a Borg cube? Just stupid.

Endless Trash
Aug 12, 2007


The Borg are now a cult that preys on people who feel lonely and sad :(

Clark Nova
Jul 18, 2004

naem posted:

hi yes this is a very good thread

don't worry, once the bad star trek season that is currently airing finishes up, people will go back to mostly posting about how much they want to gently caress dukat and garak, as is right and proper

PostNouveau
Sep 3, 2011

VY till I die
Grimey Drawer

Endless Trash posted:

The Borg are now a cult that preys on people who feel lonely and sad :(

I very much dislike that Jurati's main character trait is lonely and sad

PostNouveau
Sep 3, 2011

VY till I die
Grimey Drawer
Also I'm starting to think Rios is gonna pull a Fry from Futurama and gently caress that doctor lady and become his own great-great-great....great-grandfather

Ghostlight
Sep 25, 2009

maybe for one second you can pause; try to step into another person's perspective, and understand that a watermelon is cursing me



Maybe she wouldn't feel so lonely and sad if she hadn't needlessly killed someone.

Tiberius Christ
Mar 4, 2009

Rios season 3: I did do the nasty in the pasty!

infernal machines
Oct 11, 2012

we monitor many frequencies. we listen always. came a voice, out of the babel of tongues, speaking to us. it played us a mighty dub.

Endless Trash posted:

The Borg are now a cult that preys on people who feel lonely and sad :(

So they're a metaphor for Star Trek fandom?

KajiTheMelonMan
Sep 2, 2004

I killed a Tuskarr
Ok so I finished TNG and started DS9 again (so now I know what the gently caress is going down with Bajorans and Cardassians, who are awesome)

The OP theme sucks, but I can live with it. But the Doctor guy sucks, he's like a lovely wannabe Tom Paris crossed with a well...who the gently caress knows, a cardboard cutout doctor who isn't Robert Picardo.

Does he get to be a cool dude? (I'm only just about to finish s1)

Ghostlight
Sep 25, 2009

maybe for one second you can pause; try to step into another person's perspective, and understand that a watermelon is cursing me



He's never a cool dude but he does get a character somewhere around season 3ish

Jose Oquendo
Jun 20, 2004

Star Trek: The Motion Picture is a boring movie

KajiTheMelonMan posted:

Ok so I finished TNG and started DS9 again (so now I know what the gently caress is going down with Bajorans and Cardassians, who are awesome)

The OP theme sucks, but I can live with it. But the Doctor guy sucks, he's like a lovely wannabe Tom Paris crossed with a well...who the gently caress knows, a cardboard cutout doctor who isn't Robert Picardo.

Does he get to be a cool dude? (I'm only just about to finish s1)

I’ve never seen this take on Bashir. He starts out as a naive nerd which is the exact opposite of Paris.

PostNouveau
Sep 3, 2011

VY till I die
Grimey Drawer

KajiTheMelonMan posted:

Ok so I finished TNG and started DS9 again (so now I know what the gently caress is going down with Bajorans and Cardassians, who are awesome)

The OP theme sucks, but I can live with it. But the Doctor guy sucks, he's like a lovely wannabe Tom Paris crossed with a well...who the gently caress knows, a cardboard cutout doctor who isn't Robert Picardo.

Does he get to be a cool dude? (I'm only just about to finish s1)

They tone down his creepiness, which helps a lot. (for the most part it still comes out in some real bad eps)

KajiTheMelonMan
Sep 2, 2004

I killed a Tuskarr

Jose Oquendo posted:

I’ve never seen this take on Bashir. He starts out as a naive nerd which is the exact opposite of Paris.

So far, all I'm seeing outside of doctor-work is that he's trying to hit on Dax a lot because she's got the slug in her

(to be fair I think all humans would)

DaveWoo
Aug 14, 2004

Fun Shoe

KajiTheMelonMan posted:

Ok so I finished TNG and started DS9 again (so now I know what the gently caress is going down with Bajorans and Cardassians, who are awesome)

The OP theme sucks, but I can live with it. But the Doctor guy sucks, he's like a lovely wannabe Tom Paris crossed with a well...who the gently caress knows, a cardboard cutout doctor who isn't Robert Picardo.

Does he get to be a cool dude? (I'm only just about to finish s1)

He gets to be James Bond for an episode, does that count?

gimme the GOD DAMN candy
Jul 1, 2007
at the start of the show, bashir is a well-meaning dweeb who takes medical ethics very seriously. by the end, one of those three traits is still there.

StashAugustine
Mar 24, 2013

Do not trust in hope- it will betray you! Only faith and hatred sustain.

To be fair I think the lackadaisical approach to ethics was less a deliberate character trait and more the writers digging themselves out of holes

Prurient Squid
Jul 21, 2008

Tiddy cat Buddha improving your day.
I'd like to see the Trek creatives get so utterly desperate that their forced to play the Colm Meaney card.

edit:

Picard enters Federation containment facility 24 with grim determination. Arriving at the cell he sees a bedraggled figure behind the force field.

"You must be truly desperate to ask me for help"

Prurient Squid fucked around with this message at 15:55 on Apr 8, 2022

kdrudy
Sep 19, 2009

KajiTheMelonMan posted:

Ok so I finished TNG and started DS9 again (so now I know what the gently caress is going down with Bajorans and Cardassians, who are awesome)

The OP theme sucks, but I can live with it. But the Doctor guy sucks, he's like a lovely wannabe Tom Paris crossed with a well...who the gently caress knows, a cardboard cutout doctor who isn't Robert Picardo.

Does he get to be a cool dude? (I'm only just about to finish s1)

Once he starts hanging out with his boyfriend more, yes.

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Mulaney Power Move
Dec 30, 2004

Prurient Squid posted:

I'd like to see the Trek creatives get so utterly desperate that their forced to play the Colm Meaney card.

and he inexplicably plays obrien as roddy doyle character

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