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I'm at my wits end from being both an environmentalist and a dark wizard. I'm only able to practice in remote regions and they end up ruined. Everything starts the moment I move in and start spellcasting. Death creeps outward from my home and causes plants to wilt while animals suffer horrifically painful death spasms. Relocating the nature out of the way helps at the beginning, but the expanding circle of death always ends up covering too much surface area.
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Mar 28, 2022 23:16
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| # ? May 20, 2024 13:51 |
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Just get negative energy aligned plants, stupid. Drop by Gorshek the Defiler's flower shop for some simple suggestions.
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Mar 28, 2022 23:18
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Yvershek posted:I'm at my wits end from being both an environmentalist and a dark wizard. I'm only able to practice in remote regions and they end up ruined. Have you considered Rot druidry? Very similar effects to necromancy, and there's all sorts of molds, fungi, and poisonous flowers that thrive in that poo poo. I also know a guy who trapped an entire forest in a single moment between Life or death. It's not environmentally friendly, but he can commune with all sorts of dark beings while still living in a woodland paradise. If you only care about the Aesthetics of your lair (We're all dark wizards, we don't judge), it's something to look into.
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Mar 28, 2022 23:32
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Or become a cancermage. Too much life can be just as bad as too little!
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Mar 28, 2022 23:32
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Could you perhaps localize it in some way? Take out all the old growth? Cause Kudzu to wither and die?
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Mar 28, 2022 23:37
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Yvershek posted:I'm at my wits end from being both an environmentalist and a dark wizard. I'm only able to practice in remote regions and they end up ruined. Okay, this one is really simple. Understand that wanting to preserve the environment is good, but what environment do you want to protect? There are, cosmically speaking, all sorts of environments you might want to save. Turn your land into a shelter for rare creatures, like dragons, rust monsters or eldritch abominations. Populate your land with plants from hell, or the Far Realm. Soon you'll have your own unique ecosystem running, and it will be one that perpetuates itself, rather than being destroyed by the smallest fireballs and death curses that emerge from your stronghold.
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Mar 28, 2022 23:47
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Yvershek posted:I'm at my wits end from being both an environmentalist and a dark wizard. I'm only able to practice in remote regions and they end up ruined. Yeah and when are you going to get around to actually mentioning what the problem is?
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Mar 29, 2022 02:24
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Colonel Cancer posted:Just get negative energy aligned plants, stupid. Drop by Gorshek the Defiler's flower shop for some simple suggestions. If you do drop by in material form, dont wear anything too revealing because he didn't get the moniker Defiler for nothing, iykwim
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Mar 29, 2022 02:26
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Just watched this https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OXQbav9GcXI Another film I put off watching because I thought it was another crappy Adult Swim thing, which it isn't. It's good. It took almost 8 years to make because about only 4 people did most of the work. It's based on this short animation, posted by the animator on his YouTube channel 7-8 years ago. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vxR-oKkwJLI
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Mar 29, 2022 02:31
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Bula Vinaka posted:Just watched this Come on, again someone does this unauthorized biography of me? I get it we dark wizards are intriguing but this would be creepy if I hadn't removed my emotions and sealed them in a dewar of time dilation.
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Mar 29, 2022 02:40
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That's a pretty cool movie though
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Mar 29, 2022 02:50
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Yeah that looks pretty dope
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Mar 29, 2022 02:55
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A sordid tale of dark botany.
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Mar 29, 2022 20:49
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I watched it and it's pretty good, reminds me of animated LotR and some other films. Definately an art piece with a loose plot. I am well pleased the dark magic used in the film trapped living beings into the video itself. It APPEARS to be rotoscope but this is nearly an illusion. Brings back fond memories.
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Apr 7, 2022 13:46
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Do any other Dark Wizards celebrate their death day? I have not (I would think such things are for those of poor emotional control) but I was considering some light nonbinding sacrificial blood letting of some commoners in my honor. Maybe some kidnappings. You know - fun!
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Apr 8, 2022 02:04
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ilovebeersooomuch posted:Do any other Dark Wizards celebrate their death day? I have not (I would think such things are for those of poor emotional control) but I was considering some light nonbinding sacrificial blood letting of some commoners in my honor. Maybe some kidnappings. You know - fun! Death and life aren't really different for an immortal Lich, and honestly I didn't really notice when I actually died. The only difference was I stopped eating and lost a lot of weight. Now that I have transcended even those pathetic limitations I can honestly say: I think the day I died was extremely boring.
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Apr 8, 2022 02:12
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I think I've caught the smell of a stinky skeleton mage itt! True liches don't die, you skeletailure, that's the whole point!
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Apr 8, 2022 03:52
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man i just drink a life potion every year to stay functionally immortal i got enough to last me the next hundred years in the room next to the wine cellar ( it goes down easy with the wine) being a lich always seemed like too much work. ya gotta make a philactery, gotta sustain your form with souls, by the end of it you just look like a skeleton.
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Apr 8, 2022 04:11
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You can't use the p-word anymore. We may be undead but we're not unkind 
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Apr 8, 2022 04:15
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Anyone else raising a dark apprentice? I've been raising mine for about a decade now and I'm worried he's just a little bit too good to make a good Dark Wizard. Little bastard hasn't even tried to betray me or strike out on his own to do his own dark bidding. I feel like such a disappointment. I was trying to destroy my master 5 years into my apprenticeship (and succeeded in 8). ilovebeersooomuch posted:Do any other Dark Wizards celebrate their death day? I have not (I would think such things are for those of poor emotional control) but I was considering some light nonbinding sacrificial blood letting of some commoners in my honor. Maybe some kidnappings. You know - fun! In my neck of the woods the only wizards who make a big deal about it are the weirdos who are just a little too into Necromancy and a little too happy to be of deceased flesh. I'm not saying not to do it, but maybe keep it private and low key. You might attract some weird fuckers.
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Apr 8, 2022 04:29
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That's the problem, you're trying to "raise" your apprentice instead of simply corrupting a good, or at worst, neutral, magic user into your service once someone else done all the coddling. The only raising you oughta be doing is that of undead.
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Apr 8, 2022 04:33
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Kill apprentice bind soul to crystal Insert crystal in skeleton BAM Skeleton mage!
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Apr 8, 2022 05:20
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Colonel Cancer posted:I think I've caught the smell of a stinky skeleton mage itt! True liches don't die, you skeletailure, that's the whole point! Lol, look at this amateur, you probably haven't even created a phylactery yet. Of course you loving die as a lich, that's how you become undead. You have to die to un-die. loving babies thinking "I won't have to die if I'm a lich." Wrong! Your death is extremely painful and you have to live with that pain for absolute ages.
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Apr 8, 2022 06:45
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That reminds me. Would I be welcome at any Day of the Dead celebrations? Seems like a lot of fun. Wouldn't want to ruin it with actual death showing up.
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Apr 8, 2022 07:52
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It seems like this generation is more about Dark Arts as a corruption of things you hold dear than, say, generic or indiscriminate acts of chaos. They're more about tearing down systems of empowerment than, say, randomly soul-binding a village to sit still in the town square and watch as they slowly die of hunger. In the sense that you expect you apprentice to overthrow you, they reject that as a starting point. They're instead ignoring that to show you how little they care for your power in the face of their own ambitions. It may not be how we did things. But I'm interested to see where it goes. We all know the pendulum swings every half eon or so. Just wait it out a few hundred years and we'll be back to the ol' double crossing toadies thing.
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Apr 8, 2022 12:28
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I’m just trying to make some money off of skeletons I mean I’ve got so many of them
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Apr 8, 2022 13:47
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naem posted:I’m just trying to make some money off of skeletons They're always in need of a few good femur or skeleton guards.
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Apr 8, 2022 13:52
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FilthyImp posted:Have you considered the lucrative market of Dungeon Staging? it’s funny, I never gave my skeletons any kind of instructions on like, decorating my dungeon, I just tossed some guys shovels you know? next thing I know they’ve hollowed out half a mountain down there, with heavy timber beam supports and like, cranes and big molten pots of, I don’t know steel? they’re like, smelting down there And a uniform decor choice too, lots of spikes and skulls. Don’t ask me where the skulls are coming from (other skeletons??) I just wanted a latrine pit and forgot about them too long now BOOM dungeon
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Apr 8, 2022 14:00
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Have you encountered any time traveling meatborgs recently? Living flesh over a bony endoskeleton, talking about how Skele-Net achieves sentience and dooms the non-skeletal?
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Apr 8, 2022 14:02
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Sir, you don't have a skeleton problem. You have an entrepreneurship problem. Divide the skeleton crew into 3 groups: one for decor, one for security, and the third is a roving design crew that fixes up dilapidated dungeons for other mages and liches.
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Apr 8, 2022 14:03
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Just transmute skeletons into gold and you don't have to rent them out!
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Apr 8, 2022 20:19
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I don't know about you but the cost of transmuting un- life (even skeletony life) is too rich for my blood. Just imagine if you were to gently caress it up and wind up with cursed gold. What a loving mess.
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Apr 8, 2022 22:56
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My wizard, leaving cursed items around is half of what being capital D Dark is all about! Nothing puts a smile on my face like meddling adventurers making off with a sack of cursed gold and trying to cover costs of renting out an inn! Get this, they hand a coin to the innkeeper and then his flesh falls off, everyone's freaking out, and then his skeleton tries to take everyone's face off! Perfect Crystal Ball moment.
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Apr 8, 2022 23:26
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Colonel Cancer posted:My wizard, leaving cursed items around is half of what being capital D Dark is all about! Nothing puts a smile on my face like meddling adventurers making off with a sack of cursed gold and trying to cover costs of renting out an inn! Get this, they hand a coin to the innkeeper and then his flesh falls off, everyone's freaking out, and then his skeleton tries to take everyone's face off! Perfect Crystal Ball moment. This is a great way to have some surprise entertainment. I once dropped one of my rings of power and just left it cuz whatever I've got the antitheft spell that gives me the ability of Astral sight of whomever takes it and is not me. Some dude found it and the spell activated so I just astral snooped on the chaos a ring of power can do to some non-magical rando. He accidentally killed his best friend and when the townsfolk came to arrest him he accidentally killed them too. Like hilariously not on purpose. Like high giving his friend and ripping off friends arm and breaking his friends spine not in purpose. Like total horrific bewilderment on his part. Then the ring gave him the old fashion death scream power. He screamed while being arrested and splatter the townsfolk. Hilariously unexpected and a welcome intrusion after my latest scheme to create a titanic meatbeast fell apart when the local Civil War stopped earlier than I planned depriving me of a sufficient amount of violent flesh. God drat cleric's party came through and cured the plague I used to put stress on the population. And the bard with them bumbled into uniting the kingdom by playing concert where children from the two warring families fell in love and convinced thier parents to not actually go total war on each other. It was disgusting and disheartening.
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Apr 13, 2022 05:56
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EmbryoSteve posted:It was disgusting and disheartening. I understand, but one thing that really brings an evil grin to my face is knowing that the populace has the lifespan of mayflies with VERY short memories so it will be no time before you're out there magically sewing together masses of human organs. By the Abyss, you should see this an unexpected gift from a dark benefactor - so they have "peace", big deal. In the meantime, why not go out and get your hands dirty with some light ritual murder? It's powerful fun and is a great way to lace some uncertainty into these pathetic fools. Super fun stuff! And it will provide you with some raw materials for some of those side projects that I KNOW you have going on but have been to preoccupied with the meatbeast.
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May 17, 2022 13:59
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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AWH7LYuOtFo https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Wp9pzKbENQk
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May 19, 2022 08:21
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Hey anybody heard from Drethgar lately? Last I heard he was trying to break one of the Rules, and I got a message from him yesterday. It was hand delivered on plain paper with no spells, super weird, but he seemed kinda nervous like maybe he'd contacted an Outer One. Do not break the Rules but I hope the guy's all right. Did me a solid a couple centuries ago when a paladin wound up power-leveling in one of my dungeons.
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May 19, 2022 17:20
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ilovebeersooomuch posted:I understand, but one thing that really brings an evil grin to my face is knowing that the populace has the lifespan of mayflies with VERY short memories so it will be no time before you're out there magically sewing together masses of human organs. Yeah i went with the long con. I attended the wedding disguised as a loveable and interesting traveling scholar, and gave a "reading" of a "classical work" during the reception. That "reading" of course was a spell of Binding Of the Will. Their grandchildren will be my thralls and I can get the meat back on the menu when I get them into a new Civil War in 50-70 years. I've always wanted a titanic meatbeast, but getting that much fresh violent flesh (flesh that died in violence) is sooo difficult if you want to do it organically. Skypie posted:Hey anybody heard from Drethgar lately? Last I heard he was trying to break one of the Rules, and I got a message from him yesterday. It was hand delivered on plain paper with no spells, super weird, but he seemed kinda nervous like maybe he'd contacted an Outer One. Yeah if he made contact with an Outer One, he is probably lost to time and space and that physical note is a trap. DO NOT SCRY OR TRY TO TRACE IT. THAT WILL GIVE AN OUTER ONE A DIRECT PATH INTO YOUR MIND AND MAGIC. There is a reason we dont mess with the Outer One's. They are "outer" of a reason.
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May 19, 2022 19:08
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I had a Meat Beast fall into my Skeleton Pit one time, THAT was a mess the skeletons of course want to eat MEAT it’s like, their one drive, and Meat Beasts want to ABSORB FLESH, yeah it wasn’t pretty. ever see 100’s of ants on a popsicle? they just kept gnawing bits off him that would fall through their rib cage to the ground, then the bits would crawl back into the Beast. the skeletons are all yelling meat MEAT mEaT and the beast is yelling FLESH!!, back and forth for DAYS. the Beast’s owner came and got him eventually, he was pretty cool about the whole thing too (which I of course took as weakness and skeletonized him, dispelling the Beast and feeding all the meat to my guys) I’d hoped he was a necromancer to add to my army but he just had a Tome of Flesh or something. Must have taken him forever to enchant all that MEAT
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May 19, 2022 19:32
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| # ? May 20, 2024 13:51 |
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Bula Vinaka posted:https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AWH7LYuOtFo Nursery music? Why would you post children's songs in here?
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May 20, 2022 02:40
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