r/relationships: I have nothing against this baby.

The Something Awful Forums > Main > General Bullshit > r/relationships: I have nothing against this baby.

AreWeDrunkYet: Jul 8, 2006

Hughlander posted:

AITA for telling my sister off for saying she �dodged a bullet� when it comes to her ex.

YTA, not moving to Texas and being forced to live there for the next 10 years is indeed dodging a bullet.

OP isn't necessarily wrong, but "flipping out" to side with a sister's ex that they don't mention any personal connections with is ... suspicious. It feels like Leta escaped an arranged marriage.

# ? May 27, 2022 02:04

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# ? May 30, 2024 23:16

Midnight Voyager: Jul 2, 2008; Lipstick Apathy

I feel like she's projecting hard on this being about their infertility. She dodged the bullet of a dull, suburban lifestyle that she clearly doesn't want for herself.

# ? May 27, 2022 02:09

Plebian Parasite: Oct 12, 2012

Nah it's just that the parks definition of 'falling in' is closer to 'skidded down a slope and required assistance to get out' as opposed to 'plummeted 100 stories and left a wile e coyote imprint on the ground'

# ? May 27, 2022 02:20

Mx.: Dec 16, 2006; I'm a great fan! When I watch TV I'm always saying "That's political correctness gone mad!"
Why thankyew!

AITA for letting my husband sleep on the floor?

quote:

My husband has recently developed a really bad habit. We split the chores but whenever it�s time for him to do his, he �falls asleep�.

Today I cooked and when one of us cooks, the other cleans up. When I asked him to do this, he said he�s going to lay down for a bit and do it later. Less than a minute later he was �asleep�. I tidied up, put the food away and washed the dishes.

When I came into the room, I realised that while I was downstairs, he had taken some biscuits and snacks out of his bag and eaten them in bed. Some of the leftover food is perishable so I woke him up and asked him to please put it away.

He said he can�t because he�s sleeping so I reminded him that everyday these past two weeks I have done all the house chores, mine and his despite both of us working full time.

He got up and then �fell asleep� directly on our bedroom floor, dragging the blanket down with him which fell neatly ontop of him.

I�m pretty tired of this as it feels like a full time job doing all the cooking, cleaning, laundry and grocery shopping. I�ve had absolutely no help recently and I�m shattered. I work full time in an intensive job.

I plan on letting him continue playing this game. I don�t want to wake him up and hope that this will show him that I�m not here to just baby him. It�s also impossible that he cartoonishly fell on the floor and fell asleep whilst dragging the blanket off the bed and placing it ontop of himself.

AITA for letting him sleep on the floor?

girl u could at least throw out ALL the trash

# ? May 27, 2022 02:35

Charity Porno: Aug 2, 2021; by Hand Knit

Mx. posted:

AITA for letting my husband sleep on the floor?

girl u could at least throw out ALL the trash

The thing she is describing is either a legitimate medical issue, or faked. But just falling asleep on the floor is in no way a "I'm just a little tired" thing lol

# ? May 27, 2022 02:38

Foo Diddley: Oct 29, 2011; cat

Mx. posted:

AITA for letting my husband sleep on the floor?

girl u could at least throw out ALL the trash

trying my hardest to figure out a way to say "congrats, you married a toddler" that won't get me banned from AITA :thunkher:

# ? May 27, 2022 02:41

Charity Porno: Aug 2, 2021; by Hand Knit

Foo Diddley posted:

trying my hardest to figure out a way to say "congrats, you married a toddler" that won't get me banned from AITA

"It seems like he may be narcoleptic. Take him to his pediatrician"

# ? May 27, 2022 02:42

Party Ape: Mar 5, 2007; Don't pay $10 bucks to change my avatar! Send me a $10 donation to Doctors with Borders and I'll stop posting for 24 hours!

Hughlander posted:

AITA for telling my sister off for saying she �dodged a bullet� when it comes to her ex.

YTA, not moving to Texas and being forced to live there for the next 10 years is indeed dodging a bullet.

Is there more to this or are they trying to gatekeep the expression 'dodged a bullet'?

# ? May 27, 2022 02:47

Charity Porno: Aug 2, 2021; by Hand Knit

Party Ape posted:

Is there more to this or are they trying to gatekeep the expression 'dodged a bullet'?

Too soon for the obvious joke

# ? May 27, 2022 02:48

Quackles: Aug 11, 2018; Pixels of Light.

Blastedhellscape posted:

People who can never just say "Oh, I suppose I was wrong about that minor fact, guess I've learned something new" and move on always puzzle me. Are some people just born with double-down-if-they're-corrected-and-make-it-a-hill-to-die-on syndrome, or was there some formative childhood event that gave them that pathology?

I read an article that posited two major communication styles existed: one where looking right is most important, and being seen to be wrong lowers your status, and one where being right is most important, and it's somewhat orthogonal to status (so being corrected is usually gratefully accepted if there's no obvious ill intent).

# ? May 27, 2022 02:59

Bruceski: Aug 21, 2007; The tools of a hero mean nothing without a solid core.

Captain Hygiene posted:

Wow, that's nuts. We went there when I was a teen and I had no recollection the rim was that high up. We went there on a lengthy camping road trip though, so it's not like we just hopped off a plane and showed up.

(the weirder thing is that we drove up Pike's Peak, and I don't remember feeling too weird. I live up above 7000' now and I definitely notice the elevation hiking around above 11000', to say nothing of 14000')

I didn't notice anything when we went up Pike's or Wheeler Peak either, first time I noticed the effect was when I went down to near sea level for a trip and was suddenly full of energy and out ahead of the tour group when usually I was the slow guy. Talking to other people over the years there seems to be a lot of variety both in how severely folks are affected and how much they notice, assuming you're not usually pushing your limits. My hometown had a celebrity guest dancer from New York come visit for the Nutcracker every winter and he needed an oxygen tank kept in the wings, but the stuff he was doing was so far beyond typical exercise.

Bruceski fucked around with this message at 03:05 on May 27, 2022

# ? May 27, 2022 03:02

Megillah Gorilla: Sep 22, 2003; If only all of life's problems could be solved by smoking a professor of ancient evil texts.; Bread Liar

Foo Diddley posted:

AITA for what I (18M) told my dad after I got tired with his stupid pranks?

c'mon dad, i'm never talking to you again as a prank, lighten up

Every. Single. Time.

The ones saying "just a joke" when they hurt someone also have the thinnest loving skins.

# ? May 27, 2022 03:11

Smirking_Serpent: Aug 27, 2009

AITA for bringing up �failing up the chain of command� in police agencies to my friend who�s dead dad was a police officer?

quote:

So for context, this happened earlier today. I come from a family of cops, and I�m a civilian who works for a police agency in the US. I hate my job, I want out, but nothing pays nearly as good as what I�m making now with my education and experience.

My job has exposed me to a lot of internal law enforcement practices, including something known as �failing up the chain of command�.

Long story short, it�s common practice for problem officers who generate complaints to be promoted to desk positions or school resource officer positions to remove them from public contact. It�s for sure not all officers, there are good sergeants for sure, but it definitely happens. I�ve seen it happen in my agency before. They put you at a desk job or a job off the radar of the public because police unions are so strong that they don�t have enough justification to fire them, but they can�t generate complaints if they don�t interact with the public. They usually get promoted rapidly following a list of complaints and they are kept at sergeant, the lowest position that removes you from the street while giving you as little upward movement as possible.

Again. I clearly said this is not always the case, there are good sergeants out there.

I was aware before this conversation that their dad was a police officer, but I wasn�t aware that their father was a sergeant for basically a huge portion of their career. Their dad died some years ago from cancer after retiring, and during this conversation they got really upset with me, and demanded I stop talking about the topic, they definitely seemed to think I was implying their dad was a lovely person.

I tried explaining this isn�t the case with every cop but they seem legitimately pissed with me now.

AITA?

# ? May 27, 2022 04:19

AreWeDrunkYet: Jul 8, 2006

Smirking_Serpent posted:

AITA for bringing up �failing up the chain of command� in police agencies to my friend who�s dead dad was a police officer?

quote:

school resource officer positions to remove them from public contact

# ? May 27, 2022 04:26

trickybiscuits: Jan 13, 2008; yospos

Kenshin posted:

Looks like it, a quick Google search turns this up:

quote:
12 deaths happen each year at the Grand Canyon, including from natural causes, medical problems, suicide, heat, drowning and traffic crashes. On average, two to three deaths per year are from falls over the rim, park spokeswoman Kirby-Lynn Shedlowski says.

Maybe most of them don't fall very far.

eta:

Plebian Parasite posted:

Nah it's just that the parks definition of 'falling in' is closer to 'skidded down a slope and required assistance to get out' as opposed to 'plummeted 100 stories and left a wile e coyote imprint on the ground'

e:f;b

trickybiscuits fucked around with this message at 05:03 on May 27, 2022

# ? May 27, 2022 04:32

Mr. Lobe: Feb 23, 2007; ... Dry bones...

I'd imagine a lot probably fall down slopes while descending, which means more abrasions and less free falling

# ? May 27, 2022 04:49

Cowslips Warren: Oct 29, 2005; What use had they for tricks and cunning, living in the enemy's warren and paying his price?; Grimey Drawer

AITA for expecting my husband to pay help with expenses with his money

quote:

My husband is a stay at home dad to our 2 kids. He's been in this position for around 6-7 years, since our son was born. When our son was born, both of us decided on this agreement that I would do the work outside the home and he would around the house, and each month he'd get a portion of "fun money" to use as he wants.

My husband lost his dad a couple of months ago. Initially he was very much not OK, moving about in a trance-like state, but he's gotten a lot better, and while I don't doubt that he still misses his dad, I'm just happy he's smiling more now. Anyway, his dad used to have a business that was flourishing pretty heavily until it was sold off, and his dad was worth quite a bit. Being the only child, he got all his dad's money as inheritance.

I recently asked him if he could use some of his inheritance to help me repay my student loans. I have a lot of debt, being from a family that basically hates girl children and doesn't encourage their education (I've cut them off completely, but I still had to get some pretty massive loans for my studies). I'm slowly working to pay it off, and I'm pretty close to the finish, I have only about another year of payents to go. Him paying for the rest with his inheritance would mean that I can stop paying those loans and save more money for the rest of the family instead.

But he disagreed. He stated he's not sure what to do with the money and would just like to keep it for himself. I got pretty angry, and told him he has a wife and two children he's supposed to put before himself. I stated that if he continues to do what he's doing, he wouldn't be getting his "fun" budget any longer, now that he has money of his own.

He accused me of being financially controlling and abusive, but the way I see it is, the reason he can stay at home and be around for the kids is because I break my back earning the money for the family everyday, and if he isn't willing to spend the money he gets towards the same communal cause, then he isn't really being a team player, like what we're supposed to be in a marriage.

We're currently not talking to each other. AITA?

Edit: OK so I just found out that there's another post with a very similar situation to mine. Please let me know if I need to delete my post or whatever.

My money my money my money!

I do remember the balls on my dad, trying to get my mom's inheritance since she got some of it while the divorce was not quite done legally yet. The judge at least refused that poo poo on grounds that my dad got to keep pretty much everything else but the house (and that he had to be convinced to by his new wife, that it would Look Bad before the judge to make his ex and their two kids homeless).

# ? May 27, 2022 05:02

CannonFodder: Jan 26, 2001; Passion’s Wrench

Molten Llama posted:

People legitimately die from this poo poo at the Canyon on a regular basis. There is not an NTA big enough for this post.

She could have stranded him, gone home, and started a bonfire with all his stuff and I'd still be on her side.

The tour guide quickly separated them and got her to a safe place away from AH boyfriend. Boyfriend was probably removed from the park and told to pack his poo poo or possibly face charges. "It's just a prank bro" doesn't carry weight to Federal law enforcement.

# ? May 27, 2022 05:11

trickybiscuits: Jan 13, 2008; yospos

Hughlander posted:

AITA for moving out suddenly and financially screwing my roommate/best friend?

"Hi friend, yes I'm revoking your housing for the second time....No I didn't mean right NOW I meant at a time it would be convenient for me! Wait! Why aren't you rooming with me anymore?!?!"

You *KNOW* the whole reason only her name was on the lease was to do exactly that.

I've been thinking about this one and looked it up and was astonished that there were Redditors who thought the OP was an rear end in a top hat for moving out of the apartment she'd been told she had to leave and where she wasn't on the lease. I moved into my current apartment a year ago and my lovely-rear end roommates decided not to renew the lease so I have to move again after only a year. They have the right to do this, but it's screwed me over. It's likely that OP moved in with her friend expecting things to last at least a few years. Instead her friend told her she needed to move out after less than a year so friend could move in her FWB. You don't gently caress with people's housing. That's like loving with their job.

# ? May 27, 2022 05:35

DeeplyConcerned: Apr 29, 2008; I can fit 3 whole bud light cans now, ask me how!

yeah im afraid of heights. if somebody did the fake shove To me around the Grand Canyon I would probably congeal into a useless blob of Jell-O.

The acid vat is too good for this chuckle gently caress. let him be devoured by Hell hounds and buried in a giant pile of bat Guano.

# ? May 27, 2022 05:36

Doc Hawkins: Jun 15, 2010; Dashing? But I'm not even moving!

DeeplyConcerned posted:

The acid vat is too good for this chuckle gently caress. let him be devoured by Hell hounds and buried in a giant pile of bat Guano.

ehhhhh that seems like a lot of work when there's a perfectly good cliff RIGHT there

# ? May 27, 2022 06:12

Batterypowered7: Aug 8, 2009; The mist that chills you keeps me warm.

Doc Hawkins posted:

ehhhhh that seems like a lot of work when there's a perfectly good cliff RIGHT there

Acid vat at the bottom of the cliff

# ? May 27, 2022 06:44

Quackles: Aug 11, 2018; Pixels of Light.

E: never mind.

Quackles fucked around with this message at 08:54 on Mar 29, 2023

# ? May 27, 2022 06:53

sebmojo: Oct 23, 2010; Legit Cyberpunk

Charity Porno posted:

"It seems like he may be narcoleptic. Take him to his pediatrician"

# ? May 27, 2022 07:06

Evil Willow: Apr 26, 2007; Bored now...

Cowslips Warren posted:

AITA for expecting my husband to pay help with expenses with his money

My money my money my money!

I do remember the balls on my dad, trying to get my mom's inheritance since she got some of it while the divorce was not quite done legally yet. The judge at least refused that poo poo on grounds that my dad got to keep pretty much everything else but the house (and that he had to be convinced to by his new wife, that it would Look Bad before the judge to make his ex and their two kids homeless).

In case anyone is interested, here's the similar story she referred to...

AITA for expecting my wife to help me pay back my student loans from her inheritance?

quote:

My wife is a SAHM for our 2 kids and I work full-time as the sole income provider for the family. I am slowly working on paying back my student loans. My wife recently received a relatively large inheritance, about 5x the amount of my student loans.

A month after everything regarding the inheritance was settled, I talked with my wife about using the inheritance to pay off my loans. She refused to give me any of the money and said the inheritance belongs only to her. I told her that, yes, legally that's true but we are a family and we should share our resources to make our burdens easier. She disagreed and said my student loans pre-date our marriage and are my sole responsibility.

I felt like she was being unfair to our relationship and to us as a family, so the next day I told her that if she was not going to help me pay off her student loans, now that she has money I will not be paying for any expense that is solely hers (like clothes, eating out, flights, makeup, spas, new phone, etc.). Instead I will be putting that money towards my loans to pay them back faster. She accused me of being controlling with money and abusing my position as the income earner but I don't see why I should be responsible for all that when she has her own money now?

AITA?

# ? May 27, 2022 07:18

Sir Sidney Poitier: Aug 14, 2006; My favourite actor

Evil Willow posted:

AITA for expecting my wife to help me pay back my student loans from her inheritance?

gently caress the prenup, sounds like these guys are angling for a midnup?

Cowslips Warren posted:

I do remember the balls on my dad, trying to get my mom's inheritance since she got some of it while the divorce was not quite done legally yet. The judge at least refused that poo poo on grounds that my dad got to keep pretty much everything else but the house (and that he had to be convinced to by his new wife, that it would Look Bad before the judge to make his ex and their two kids homeless).

A friend recently went through an acrimonious divorce which lasted a while and rendered him quite unhappy. The day that it was all finalised, his dad (who is a judge) let him know that actually during the middle of the process he'd got a sizeable inheritance. His dad had kept the inheritance secret such that my friend didn't know and so didn't have to declare it, and it worked.

Sir Sidney Poitier fucked around with this message at 08:29 on May 27, 2022

# ? May 27, 2022 08:26

edgeman83: Jul 13, 2003

AITA for being honest about not being excited for my mom's wedding when she is marrying my bully's dad?

quote:

My mom and I have always been super close, which is why I feel like a bit of an rear end in a top hat. When I was 13, she moved in with her BF "Tyler" who had a 14 year old "Riley" who hated me and my mom. Riley was catty and constantly taking digs at me and trying to lower my self esteem.

Riley's grandmother and dad spoiled her a lot, so my mom felt that was unfair to me, and Tyler began spending money on me to make things even. This upset Riley for some reason (which I really don't understand, she had every she wanted financially) so the bullying got worse. Riley ended up humiliating me in front of a boy i liked, by telling him that I wrote "erotic fanfiction" about the two of us, which was a lie. Tyler refused to discipline her beyond talking to her, so my mom had to make the hard choice to leave him for my mental health.

She dated a couple other guys, but never got over Tyler. Pretty much the moment I turned 18, she got back with him. I'm 20 now and they are getting married. I'm not going to lie and say I am happy about it, but up until this point I kept everything to myself. It just really hurts to feel that she prioritizes this relationship over me, and expects me to even be in the same room as Riley. Also Tyler continues to make excuses about Riley was only acting out due to trauma, so I really don't get how my mom can want to be with him, but obviously it isn't my business.

The issue is my mom wants me to have a large role in the wedding planning. She recently went dress shopping and seemed disappointed that I wasn't more excited. She also talks about the wedding constantly. Finally she asked me if I had an issue, because she thought this would be much more of a bonding experience.

I was honest and said she can do whatever she wants, but I'm not happy for her or excited. i feel she is being selfish and kind of a bad mom, and it hurts me that she can even love a dude like that. My mom burst into tears and all of her friends looked at me like I was the rear end in a top hat. Tyler is now being very cold to me, and Riley had to jump in and say I'm immature and she doesn't like my mom or I, but now that we are adults I'm crazy to expect my mom to prioritize me at all.

"I am sorry I am marrying the person who enabled your bullying, but I want his dick soooo bad! Can't you just act like it never happened?"

edgeman83 fucked around with this message at 08:35 on May 27, 2022

# ? May 27, 2022 08:33

therobit: Aug 19, 2008; I've been tryin' to speak with you for a long time

Sir Sidney Poitier posted:

gently caress the prenup, sounds like these guys are angling for a midnup?

A friend recently went through an acrimonious divorce which lasted a while and rendered him quite unhappy. The day that it was all finalised, his dad (who is a judge) let him know that actually during the middle of the process he'd got a sizeable inheritance. His dad had kept the inheritance secret such that my friend didn't know and so didn't have to declare it, and it worked.

In a lot of states an inheritance does not become marital property unless you commingle it with shared money.

# ? May 27, 2022 08:37

sephiRoth IRA: Jun 13, 2007; "Science is not only compatible with spirituality; it is a profound source of spirituality."

-Carl Sagan

Maybe im just weird, but I think I would be happy to pay off my spouse's loans with a windfall like that?

Like very clearly these people are all in awful marriages. I think absent more information (was the breadwinner being a piece of controlling poo poo all the time etc) its an ESH situation. If your first instinct with an inheritance like that is "I'm gonna live it up, gently caress everything else" then you are an rear end in a top hat.

*Obviously threatening to take money away from the unemployed spouse after the fact is an rear end in a top hat move as well*

They all sound like selfish people

# ? May 27, 2022 12:45

Judge Schnoopy: Nov 2, 2005; dont even TRY it, pal

edgeman83 posted:

AITA for being honest about not being excited for my mom's wedding when she is marrying my bully's dad?

"I am sorry I am marrying the person who enabled your bullying, but I want his dick soooo bad! Can't you just act like it never happened?"

How is this your takeaway lmao

"I prioritized you by waiting on this relationship until you were old enough to not be directly impacted by it. You're an adult, it's time to move on" seems well and perfectly reasonable to me

# ? May 27, 2022 12:54

sephiRoth IRA: Jun 13, 2007; "Science is not only compatible with spirituality; it is a profound source of spirituality."

-Carl Sagan

Judge Schnoopy posted:

How is this your takeaway lmao

"I prioritized you by waiting on this relationship until you were old enough to not be directly impacted by it. You're an adult, it's time to move on" seems well and perfectly reasonable to me

It's a bit more complicated than that. She's being irretrievably yoked to these people she doesn't like, someone who traumatized her and the enabler, and her mom is asking her to be super pumped about it. Yes, she should be happy for her moms happiness, but she also doesn't need to be super involved or enthusiastic about these people being family.

If I were her I'd probably help plan things but start to pull away afterwards.

# ? May 27, 2022 12:58

Zulily Zoetrope: Jun 1, 2011; Muldoon

I particularly like the stepsister chiming in "I got over me bullying you, it's time for you to grow up and do the same."

can you imagine losing that family dynamic, what a blow

# ? May 27, 2022 13:01

Aesop Poprock: Oct 21, 2008; Grimey Drawer

Cthulu Carl posted:

Most people use the Thompson training method

I might have researched it wrong but I'm not letting a seal anywhere near nipples

# ? May 27, 2022 13:08

Zulily Zoetrope: Jun 1, 2011; Muldoon

Yeah that's not how you do it:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Q7K5LSsJN90&t=57s

# ? May 27, 2022 13:10

Alchenar: Apr 9, 2008

sephiRoth IRA posted:

Maybe im just weird, but I think I would be happy to pay off my spouse's loans with a windfall like that?

Like very clearly these people are all in awful marriages. I think absent more information (was the breadwinner being a piece of controlling poo poo all the time etc) its an ESH situation. If your first instinct with an inheritance like that is "I'm gonna live it up, gently caress everything else" then you are an rear end in a top hat.

*Obviously threatening to take money away from the unemployed spouse after the fact is an rear end in a top hat move as well*

They all sound like selfish people

When Dad gave up his job they decided to co-mingle income but not wealth, with the income bringer setting the terms on which it was shared.

Mum was happy with the deal when it put her in control.

# ? May 27, 2022 13:16

sephiRoth IRA: Jun 13, 2007; "Science is not only compatible with spirituality; it is a profound source of spirituality."

-Carl Sagan

Alchenar posted:

When Dad gave up his job they decided to co-mingle income but not wealth, with the income bringer setting the terms on which it was shared.

Mum was happy with the deal when it put her in control.

Eh. The fun money agreement could run the gamut from super abusive and controlling to shared decisions for financial obligations and making sure dad can blow off steam with discretionary income. Without more info I still say ESH.

# ? May 27, 2022 13:35

Fil5000: Jun 23, 2003; HOLD ON GUYS I'M POSTING ABOUT INTERNET ROBOTS

sephiRoth IRA posted:

Maybe im just weird, but I think I would be happy to pay off my spouse's loans with a windfall like that?

Like very clearly these people are all in awful marriages. I think absent more information (was the breadwinner being a piece of controlling poo poo all the time etc) its an ESH situation. If your first instinct with an inheritance like that is "I'm gonna live it up, gently caress everything else" then you are an rear end in a top hat.

*Obviously threatening to take money away from the unemployed spouse after the fact is an rear end in a top hat move as well*

They all sound like selfish people

I had an inheritance recently and the first thing I did was discuss it with my partner and then we payed off a bunch of her outstanding credit, because we didn't NEED anything, interest rates are low, and paying off higher interest debts to free up her income from paying those debts off monthly just made sense. I assumed this is what grown ups in healthy relationships just do. If you're lucky enough to suddenly have a large wodge of cash lying around you're an rear end in a top hat if you just go 'oh this? This is mine".

# ? May 27, 2022 13:44

Lottery of Babylon: Apr 25, 2012; STRAIGHT TROPIN'

Judge Schnoopy posted:

How is this your takeaway lmao

"I prioritized you by waiting on this relationship until you were old enough to not be directly impacted by it. You're an adult, it's time to move on" seems well and perfectly reasonable to me

"You've grown up and left, it doesn't affect you, move on. Now get back over here into the wedding party and spend months planning my wedding with them."

Also, the fact that she can forgive and love him despite his remorseless bullying-enabling of her daughter is understandably not doing to look good to her daughter. Guess mommy dearest doesn't see cruelty to her child as a deal-breaking character flaw.

WIBTA if I uninvited a mutual friend to a birthday party?

quote:

I�m currently a high school student and am quite sociable so I�m quite friendly with others. This created my current major friend group, a group of 8 (including me) and I�m close with 6 of them; the one I am not, I�ll call E. E is an student from Europe who has been in the US for quite a while, so he�s aware of culture clashes and boundaries because of the diversity in our school. I�m hosting quite a large birthday party which includes a lot of my close (and huge) family and I invited the whole friend group, but I started reconsidering after I tried getting to know E better.

I�m mixed (SEA and EA), and E, being a European guy (EDIT: I did not mean to imply all Europeans are racist; what I meant to say is that because he�s European I did not expect him to handle racism in the same manner we do in the states), keeps making offensive borderline racist comments only to call me sensitive afterwards. He�ll refer to me as a half breed, make fun of my SEA side for being colonized, make racist jokes and gestures (ex: mimicking me when I speak Mandarin) and does the same to our fellow Asian friends. A lot of my family and friends are also SEA/EA, and it�s not a secret that many of our people idolize lighter skin tones and European/White people. Knowing this, E has continuously talked about how at my birthday party, he wouldn�t be surprised if my family was all up on him.

I talked about uninviting him to one of our mutual friends, as I�m extremely uncomfortable letting someone who makes comments like these and passes them off as jokes or me being too sensitive to meet my family. The mutual friend said that they understand where I�m coming from, but it would be extremely rude to un-invite him because the whole friend group is going and that E does not really have any other friends. WIBTA if I uninvited him?

Wonder why he doesn't have any other friends. Acid vats for him and for the "not inviting rude racists into your home is the real rudeness" git.

# ? May 27, 2022 13:59

Soylent Pudding: Jun 22, 2007; We've got people!

AITA for saying my brother is married to our "precious mom" to his girlfriend?

quote:

I really don't think I was an rear end in a top hat but even my dad said I hosed up so I had the need to write this to here.

We are 4 brothers. I am the biggest (38M),then there is K(32M), F(29M) and our smallest J(25M),who has been a surprise egg. J is the one I am talking about. Our mom is 62 years old and our dad is 64

When I was 15,my mom and my dad got a divorce(they were a terrible couple since I remember) I stayed with my dad permanently while my brothers moved to my mom's hometown with my mom. I was studying in a private high school so I didn't move,also I love my dad more. He is a much more stable and relaxed guy to live with. My dad always made an effort to see my brothers and he would go to my mom's hometown by plane weekly even if he was post night-shift(he is a surgeon). One by one,K and F started to move in with us because of education and mostly due to my mom being paranoid and controlling,except J.

J was always momma's boy. When I would go to my mom's house,he would never leave his side and after he turned 18,he rejected one of the best university offers in our country to stay with mom and went to vocational school. Then he started to take care of our mom full time even though she didn't need. They are currently like a married couple and my mom never really lets his leash. If he is traveling somewhere for work,our mom comes with him and stays in a nearby hotel. She maybe calls us once a month and when she calls,it is mostly about how J being a devoted son and we being assholes who doesn't give her any attention. We jokingly say they are a married couple and we are the side-chicks.

5 months ago,,J called us out of the blue and said he was in our town and he brought his girlfriend to meet with us. We were pleasantly surprised and when we met her,she was a really sweet girl. She was always very warm with my dad and my brothers but when we talked,it was always in a formal situation. She would always call me Mr. Surname contrary to my dad and my brothers.It was weird but I thought she was raised in a hierarchal household so I let it go. A week ago,she called me and said she wanted to meet me. I said "Sure" and when we met up,she asked how could I leave my mom in an instance and abandon my siblings,how could I not care about my brother and why I basically betrayed my family. I started to laugh. I told her everything from the divorce to now and said "My brother will always have mom first,you should get used to that." Than I asked her their future plans and she realized it always involved mom. She was flabbergasted,said thanks and left the table. Two days later J got front of my door drunk and yelled "YOU MADE US BROKE APART,MOM WAS RIGHT YOU ARE NOTHING BUT A HOMEWRECKER. I HATE YOU AND I HOPE YOU DIE ALONE." I called the cops and he spent a night inside the detention.

Now all of my family thinks I wrecked his life,I think it was a long needed wake-up call. So,AITA?

# ? May 27, 2022 14:08

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# ? May 30, 2024 23:16

Uncle Enzo: Apr 28, 2008; I always wanted to be a Wizard

Soylent Pudding posted:

AITA for saying my brother is married to our "precious mom" to his girlfriend?

OP could use an ounce of sympathy for his brother that got spouse-ified and ensnared in an abusive codependent relationship while he was still a kid. But otherwise they didn't do anything wrong.

# ? May 27, 2022 14:20

The Something Awful Forums > Main > General Bullshit > r/relationships: I have nothing against this baby.

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