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Jim won't stop eating spaghetti at his desk. He literally won't stop. 24 hours a day, 7 days a week, he just sits at his desk and ravenously eats from a plate of spaghetti that never seems to end. He ignores any and all attempts at communication and no amount of physical force can move him or even slow down his consumption. The eternally spaghetti-eating Jim becomes a permanent fixture of the office, and this enigmatic prank (if it even can be called a prank) begins to take a strange psychological toll on his co-workers. After approximately three months of this, Meredith screams that she can't take it any more and attempts to seize the spaghetti plate only to recoil, howling in pain with glowing white-hot burns on her hands. She has to be taken to the hospital. Jim eats spaghetti at his desk.
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# ? Jun 5, 2022 20:01 |
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# ? May 29, 2024 17:17 |
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jim crawls slowly into the office, spreading slime everywhere from his single muscular foot. munching a lettuce leaf, his eyes extend on two tentacular stalks as he slugs for the camera.
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# ? Jun 5, 2022 20:34 |
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After days of negotiations between Jim and Dwight with Toby as mediator, Jim agrees to limit himself to just one plate of spaghetti per day. The next day, Jim shows up with one plate and a single noodle over 18000 feet long that takes an entire workday to slurp.
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# ? Jun 6, 2022 01:05 |
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(based on a 12in/sec slurping speed and a 5hr workday.)
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# ? Jun 6, 2022 01:17 |
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Inexplicable Humblebrag posted:jim crawls slowly into the office, spreading slime everywhere from his single muscular foot. munching a lettuce leaf, his eyes extend on two tentacular stalks as he slugs for the camera.
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# ? Jun 6, 2022 01:21 |
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Jim eats spaghetti at his desk until his stomach bursts and hundreds of Tiny Jim’s burst out. Dwight fights them off, but one gets away. The next day, it has grown into a full-sized Jim, and brings a huge plate of spaghetti in with it to work. Dwight sighs disapproval. “Spaghetti and spawning miniature versions of yourself again? I think you’re running out of ideas, Jim.”
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# ? Jun 6, 2022 01:25 |
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Dwight spends all of Prankmas on high alert waiting for Jim's prank. Jim isn't at the office during work hours so he must be setting up something terrible. Dwight's anxiety steadily increases as he leaves the office, heads home, fixes and eats supper, and watches Battlestar episodes until the stroke of midnight. As Dwight climbs into bed he wonders if anxiety of a prank not delivered was the real prank all along. Meanwhile at the Scranton Dave & Busters, a sweat-soaked Jim feeds yet another token into the claw machine. 17 hours and he still hasn't gotten that drat whoopie cushion.
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# ? Jun 6, 2022 01:26 |
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Jim eats spaghetti at his desk until his stomach bursts and hundreds of Tiny Jims burst out. By the next day each of the Tiny Jims has grown to a full-sized Jim and each of them brings their own spaghetti plate to work. Within just a few days the entire east coast is overrun with Jims and the global spaghetti supply is dangerously low.
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# ? Jun 6, 2022 01:28 |
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Slug Jim sucks a plate of spaghetti up through his proboscis. He slurps so much that he bursts and hundreds of tiny slug Jims escape and slowly slime away on their strong muscular foots. The whole disgusting spectacle is repeated the next day by hundreds of fully formed Slug Jims, each with their own bowls of spaghetti balanced carefully on their shells.
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# ? Jun 6, 2022 01:35 |
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It's Sunday night, the best part of the weekend. Monday morning's tomorrow, and Jim can directly prank Dwight at work. He, Jim, prepares his materials, and steps into his empty garage - his shrine to all things pranking - to complete the ritual. Jim enters the JIMZONE and jims himself to the max. Halpert upon Halpert of pure prank energy flows through his body, recharging his chakra points and enhancing the pranking centers of his brain. Only Cosmic Jim is benevolent enough to bless the Jims of the multiverse with this sacred power; without this blessing, Jim is nothing. Recharged, Jim begins thinking of pranks to play for this week. First, he'll replace Dwight's beet sandwich with a radish sandwich. It's a light prank, but Jim feels that it's good to start off mild this week just to shake things up. After all, there's always time to set Dwight's house on fire, erase Angela from existence, and frame Dwight for the JFK assassination. The possibilities are as unlimited as the Jims in existence. Jim mugs the camera. It's going to be another great week.
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# ? Jun 6, 2022 01:39 |
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Jim bites into a pomegranate. Where you would expect to see seeds, instead are screaming tiny Dwights. Jim mugs at the camera, dying Dwights running down his glistening chin.
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# ? Jun 6, 2022 01:44 |
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Jim is wearing an ostentatious diamond ring. When he turns it into the light just right, Dwight’s screaming soul can be glimpsed for a moment.
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# ? Jun 6, 2022 01:49 |
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Jim is wearing an oversized large Ring Pop candy. When he turns it into the light just right, Dwight’s screaming soul can be glimpsed for a moment. Jim gives the Ring Pop an occasional lick and wears an expression of pure decadence after every one.
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# ? Jun 6, 2022 02:39 |
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Jim is wearing an oversized large Rescue Rangers BK Kids' Club Toy Ring. When he turns it into the light just right, Dwight's screaming soul can be glimpsed for a moment. Jim gives the gadget side of the ring an occasional lick and wears an expression of pure decadence after every one.
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# ? Jun 6, 2022 02:53 |
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Dwight suddenly realizes that his mouth feels really weird and cramped. He walks over to a mirror and opens his mouth, revealing Jim’s head. Jim has burrowed himself into Dwight and eaten his (Dwight’s) tongue, attaching himself (Jim) to where the tongue used to be and becoming a parasite. Jim mugs the camera as Dwight attempts to scream.
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# ? Jun 6, 2022 03:03 |
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Jim won't stop crowing about how Bill Cosby was released from prison. "Told you he was innocent! I told you!" says Jim, getting up in Dwight's face. "Looks like you owe me my twenty bucks back!" Dwight tries to explain the difference between being "innocent" and having a conviction overturned on a technicality but Jim won't hear of it. Dwight eventually pays Jim twenty bucks to go away even though Jim never actually paid the twenty dollars he lost to Dwight in the first place. In confessional, Jim declares "finally it's legal to eat pudding pops again!" Jim mugs the camera with chocolate all over his face. (Note: this prank takes place in June of 2021).
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# ? Jun 6, 2022 03:13 |
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Jim transforms himself into an eternally shrieking skull then shrinks himself down to the size of a pea and flies deep into Dwight's ear.
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# ? Jun 6, 2022 03:28 |
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It’s the attack of the Snail Jim’s. They spread to a new town, consume all the spaghetti, spawn more, and travel further again. Already the eastern seaboard is swarmed by the large grotesque monstrosities with unkempt shells and floppy eyestalks. But now they’re headed for the Famous Original Lorenzo’s Spaghetti Factory and Family Pizza Parlor in Trenton, New Jersey. Dwight knows that once they reach the factory, there will be no hope of stopping the Jims. He throws a grenade and performs a rolling dismount from his motorcycle as he smoothly pulls out an uzi and begins to spray lead at the closest giant sluglike Jim. Backing up slowly, Dwight is able to maneuver himself to where he breaks and sprints to the factory. Just barely making it there before the violent wave of slugs, Dwight is able to slam the door shut behind him. He pulls out a gas can and lighter, ready to make the ultimate sacrifice. From outside he hears a Slug Jim huff, “We’ll, I guess shell-vary is dead!” He can’t be sure, but Dwight thinks he can hear the squelching sound of Jim turning his head in the direction of a camera.
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# ? Jun 6, 2022 04:14 |
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lmao dammit
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# ? Jun 6, 2022 04:30 |
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Jim usually allows some free time for Dwight to live without pranks. If it's at the office or on the farm, it's fair game for pranking, otherwise, it's off limits. But Schrute had to make it a work issue by filling out an employer tuition reimbursement form for some night classes he was going to take this semester. Fine. If that's what Dwight wants, then he's going to get it... Jim successfully gets Dwight kicked out of school after the third day of classes. This results in his transcripts showing an expulsion and requiring him to make a full repayment of the tuition reimbursement to the company.
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# ? Jun 6, 2022 04:38 |
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Jim hits the NOS and drifts past Dwight to win the street race
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# ? Jun 6, 2022 05:35 |
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Jim makes Dwight guess the number of jellybeans in the jar. Dwight's guess would be correct except he fails to account for the live grenade Jim has secreted among the jellybeans.
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# ? Jun 6, 2022 05:38 |
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Flail snail Jim uses Scintillating Shell against Dwight, blinding him.
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# ? Jun 6, 2022 14:24 |
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Dwight legally changes his name to "The Prankrunner" somehow this name change also gives him the ability to run at incredible speeds. Also the only words he ever says when Jim is in earshot are "BEET BEET!" Try as he might Jim cannot catch the Prankrunner in order to prank him. Jim decides that making The Prankrunner run into the side of a mountain would be an excellent prank. To this end he draws an exceedingly realistic picture of a road tunnel on the side of a mountain. No sooner is the drawing completed than an entirely real truck drives out of the tunnel flattening him. As Jim is lying on the floor The Prankrunner runs up and abruptly stops next to him (Jim), leaning down he (The Prankrunner) shouts "BEET BEET" right in Jim's face. This startles Jim, causing him to leap up in the air and bang his head on a tree branch, raising a large welt. The Prankrunner runs away through the tunnel, Jim atrempts to give chase but the tunnnel reverts to being a simple drawing, causing Jim to charge straight into the side of the mountain, ironically this is the exact outcome Jim intended for The Prankrunner.
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# ? Jun 6, 2022 14:54 |
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Jim and Dwight form an uneasy truce, working together to cook up clown paper in the dark, self-contained basement hidden under the warehouse's paper baler. There, during the long arduous labor, a single fly makes its way into the room. They spend hours trying to capture the fly, nearly coming to the end of their sanity as they attempt to recapture it. Finally, trapping it in a glass jar, Jim looks at it and smirks, "Got you, Zipper. Got you now."
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# ? Jun 6, 2022 15:03 |
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Jim challenges Dwight to a “sex” off, crudely leering at Pam. Dwight tries to report this to HR but is stymied during a meeting where Toby, visibly aroused, repeatedly asks him to describe what Pam was wearing.
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# ? Jun 6, 2022 15:08 |
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After catching Zipper in a jar (this version of Jim lives in the same world as Who Framed Roger Rabbit) Jim plots to teleport him to Venus, "the opposite of Mars." However a horrible accident merges Jim's DNA with the cartoon character's, turning him into Pranklefly.
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# ? Jun 6, 2022 15:09 |
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After catching Zipper in a jar (this version of Jim lives in the same world as Who Framed Roger Rabbit) Jim opens up a jar of dip. He gloats to Dwight (who is tied up): "Remember me, Balloon Boy? When I pranked your brother, I talked.... just... like.... this!"
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# ? Jun 6, 2022 15:40 |
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jim gets down on one knee and proposes to dwight. dwight is too polite to cause jim the pain of rejection, and accepts. later, jim mugs the dearly beloved gathered here today.
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# ? Jun 6, 2022 15:52 |
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Jim, now Pranklefly, keeps kidnapping "hot cartoon babes" and traps them in a nest on top of the WB water tower. Meanwhile Dunder Mifflin is more and more staffed by cartoons. Dwight notes that his new coworker Yosemite Sam, despite some problematic political views, is a far better salesman than Jim ever was. Meanwhile the new secretary Holly Wood clearly has eyes for him and Porky Pig is easily the best branch manager they've ever had (and becomes a close friend, relying on Dwight to help lead despite his stutter and confidence issues). Unfortunately for Dwight, the night before his big date with Holly, she hears a menacing buzz as she walks through the parking lot. The horrible silhouette of Pranklefly blocks the sun as it descends on her...
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# ? Jun 6, 2022 15:53 |
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Jim sells Famous Original Jim's (the worst pizza place in all of Scranton, possibly in all of Pennsylvania) and uses the money to buy a food truck. Famouser Originaler Jim's Pizza Truck. The next morning Dwight comes downstairs to discover that Jim has crashed his food truck through the wall of Dwight's kitchen and the only thing to eat is now Famous Original Jim's "Breakfastier than Breakfast" pizza.
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# ? Jun 6, 2022 18:31 |
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Jim shows up to work wearing neon green legwarmers. You won't believe what happens next!
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# ? Jun 6, 2022 19:56 |
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Jim decides to "raise the steaks" by launching all the steak in Scranton into the stratosphere just hours before Dwight and Angela are supposed to have a romantic date at Scranton's fanciest and most romantic steakhouse.
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# ? Jun 7, 2022 01:16 |
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(The fanciest and most romantic steakhouse "in" Scranton is actually the Wilkes-Barre Outback Steakhouse next to the Lowe's but that's neither here nor there.)
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# ? Jun 7, 2022 01:32 |
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Jim kicks out one of the wheels on Dwight's office chair "accidentally" such that Dwight is now facing at a 45 degree angle and must stare down his nose at his computer. Slowly, very slowly, the ensuing strain on Dwight's eye muscles erodes his sight until Jim can do funny stuff like flip him off in front of his face and Dwight won't even know
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# ? Jun 7, 2022 01:37 |
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Jim decides to "raise the steaks" by feeding all of Dwight's cows a serum that causes them to grow freakishly long legs like something out of Salvador Dali.
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# ? Jun 7, 2022 01:39 |
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Jim decides to "raise the steaks" by opening up a livestock factory farm next door to Dwight's beet farm. The ensuing toxic runoff from the inhumanely raised cows routed through Dwight's farm, piped in the leakiest, cheapest sewer pipe from Jim's Hardware Shoppe, eventually causes Dwight's beets to turn from a super food to just poisonous, cratering Dwight's reputation in Scranton, and causing all his charitable works to be revoked, crushing Dwight's soul. "Talk about a milk run", quips Jim before he drinks a fresh cup of milk, and mugs the camera with a milkstache.
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# ? Jun 7, 2022 02:22 |
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Jim decides to "raise the steaks" by holding the city hostage with a nuclear device. Jim's ransom demand? Dwight must beat the Cosmo's Cheesesteak Challenge. Dwight has to consume 3ft of cheesesteak and 2lb of fries in 30 mins or thousands will die in nuclear hellfire.
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# ? Jun 7, 2022 02:49 |
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Dwight starts eating cheesesteaks at his desk
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# ? Jun 7, 2022 02:58 |
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# ? May 29, 2024 17:17 |
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Jim decorates his desk with a 1930 bomber pin up girl. Dwight starts to object but then realizes he's a waistgunner on a B-25 bomber on a daylight run over Munich and just having a trauma-induced hallucination that he's a paper salesman in Scranton. "Get your head in the game, balloon boy!" shouts Jim, slapping Dwight hard on the helmet. "Messerschmitts at three o'clock high!" Dwight swings around his machine gun and lets off a barrage of bullets. A flak round explodes behind Dwight and Jim's face gets splattered across the bulkhead in front of him. It looks like Jim is smirking. Applewhite fucked around with this message at 04:00 on Jun 7, 2022 |
# ? Jun 7, 2022 03:50 |