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Benjamin Disraeli
Oct 19, 2005

Let's have some fun
This beat is sick
Let's play a Love game!

Rusty Shackelford posted:

Washington Bullets/Wizards
Cleveland Indians/Guardians
Tampa Bay Devil Rays/Rays
New Orleans Hornets/Pelicans
Charlotte Bobcats/Hornets

Houston Cold 45s/Astros

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CocoaNuts
Jun 12, 2020

Android Apocalypse posted:

Has anybody suggested "The Washington Sexual Harassment Suit" ITT?

It's not too late! The Washington Touchy Feelies.


https://twitter.com/TMZ_Sports/status/1489326607613505544

swickles
Aug 21, 2006

I guess that I don't need that though
Now you're just some QB that I used to know
The Florida Marlins changed to the Miami Marlins recently. Also, Mighty Duck to just Ducks.

drunk leprechaun
May 7, 2007
sobriety is for the weak and the stupid
Here's a pretty definitive list.

https://paullukas.bulletin.com/grading-sports-team-renamings

predicto
Jul 22, 2004

THE DEM DEFENDER HAS LOGGED ON

Android Apocalypse posted:

Has anybody suggested "The Washington Sexual Harassment Suit" ITT?

The Washington Predators

Shrimpy
May 18, 2004

Sir, I'm going to need to see your ticket.

Rusty Shackelford posted:

Has any name change (not associated with a relocation) ever gone well?

Phoenix Cardinals to Arizona Cardinals seemed to work out fine.

WalletBeef
Jun 11, 2005

The Washington Touchers

Pablo Bluth
Sep 7, 2007

I've made a huge mistake.
They could have named the team after the construction of the football and gone with Washington Four Skins.

Q_res
Oct 29, 2005

We're fucking built for this shit!
I'm just curious, do you guys think the new name would work better if they changed to DC?

i.e. D.C. Commanders

predicto
Jul 22, 2004

THE DEM DEFENDER HAS LOGGED ON

Q_res posted:

I'm just curious, do you guys think the new name would work better if they changed to DC?

i.e. D.C. Commanders

Actually yes
Not sure why tho

predicto
Jul 22, 2004

THE DEM DEFENDER HAS LOGGED ON

WalletBeef posted:

The Washington Touchers

The Washington Touchdown Theres

CocoaNuts
Jun 12, 2020

predicto posted:

The Washington Touchdown Theres

bawfuls
Oct 28, 2009

Rusty Shackelford posted:

Cleveland Indians/Guardians
This one is dumb and bad because they declined to go with the much cooler Spiders option

Also their Guardians logos are ugly and clearly meant to evoke the previous name imagery to sooth angry fans which won’t work anyway.

bawfuls fucked around with this message at 21:16 on Feb 13, 2022

LargeHadron
May 19, 2009

They say, "you mean it's just sounds?" thinking that for something to just be a sound is to be useless, whereas I love sounds just as they are, and I have no need for them to be anything more than what they are.

Q_res posted:

I'm just curious, do you guys think the new name would work better if they changed to DC?

i.e. D.C. Commanders

Oh heck yeah. D.C. Commanders sounds like some kind of authoritarian cyberpunk deal

Snowy
Oct 6, 2010

A man whose blood
Is very snow-broth;
One who never feels
The wanton stings and
Motions of the sense



Commanders D.C.

The CDC

CocoaNuts
Jun 12, 2020
drat! Don't let this saga be over.

The Washington Scammers!!


Congress says Washington Commanders appear to have broken financial laws, owe money to visiting teams, season-ticket holders

WASHINGTON -- The U.S. House Oversight Committee sent a letter to the Federal Trade Commission saying it found evidence the NFL's Washington Commanders engaged in unlawful financial conduct.

In the letter obtained by The Associated Press, the committee said the team withheld ticket revenue from visiting teams and refundable ticket deposits from season-ticket holders.

The committee said emails, documents and statements made by former employees indicate team executives and owner Dan Snyder engaged in "a troubling, long-running, and potentially unlawful pattern of financial conduct."

The committee is sharing documents with the FTC while requesting the commission take any action necessary to make sure the money is returned to its rightful owners.

https://www.espn.com/nfl/story/_/id...-ticket-holders

Impossibly Perfect Sphere
Nov 6, 2002

They wasted Luanne on Lucky!

She could of have been so much more but the writers just didn't care!
Apparently this was so institutionalized the execs all referred to their ill-gotten revenue as "juice" in communications.

Washington Juicers

CocoaNuts
Jun 12, 2020
The Washington Ex-Dans.


Multiple NFL owners are expressing interest in voting to oust Washington Commanders owner Dan Snyder as accusations mount of financial improprieties and workplace misconduct within the organization.

“There’s growing frustration about the Washington situation and not over one issue, but over how much smoke there is,” one owner told USA Today in an op-ed published Saturday. “I think everybody’s getting tired of it.”

Another team owner detailed the league’s last meeting in March, at which time some owners expressed their anger about Snyder’s situation with NFL Commissioner Roger Goodell in attendance, according to USA Today.

“We are counting votes,” the owner said, adding that it will take 24 votes from owners to force Snyder to sell his stake in the franchise.

https://thehill.com/news/state-watch/3498879-some-nfl-owners-look-to-oust-dan-snyder-as-accusations-mount-report/

A.o.D.
Jan 15, 2006
Let's be honest, here. The only thing they give a crap about is that Dan was stealing money from the rest of the league.

LeeMajors
Jan 20, 2005

I've gotta stop fantasizing about Lee Majors...
Ah, one more!


A.o.D. posted:

Let's be honest, here. The only thing they give a crap about is that Dan was stealing money from the rest of the league.

Stealing from the league is the only good thing that sack of poo poo has ever done.

Jean-Paul Shartre
Jan 16, 2015

this sentence no verb


CocoaNuts posted:

The Washington Ex-Dans.

Please. It's the Snyder Cut.

predicto
Jul 22, 2004

THE DEM DEFENDER HAS LOGGED ON

JohnCompany posted:

Please. It's the Snyder Cut.

:bravo:

WalletBeef
Jun 11, 2005

The Washington RedDans ?!?!?

Android Apocalypse
Apr 28, 2009

The future is
AUTOMATED
and you are
OBSOLETE

Illegal Hen
A team changing its name to its owner, only to have them ousted would be pretty :haw:.

Now I want to see it.

fartknocker
Oct 28, 2012


Damn it, this always happens. I think I'm gonna score, and then I never score. It's not fair.



Wedge Regret

Android Apocalypse posted:

A team changing its name to its owner, only to have them ousted would be pretty :haw:.

Now I want to see it.

Not the owner, but this is basically the Cleveland Browns when Art Modell fired Paul Brown.

Flikken
Oct 23, 2009

10,363 snaps and not a playoff win to show for it

fartknocker posted:

Not the owner, but this is basically the Cleveland Browns when Art Modell fired Paul Brown.

Paul Brown was a minority stake holder at the time.

syzpid
Aug 9, 2014

Android Apocalypse posted:

A team changing its name to its owner, only to have them ousted would be pretty :haw:.

Now I want to see it.

The Panthers put up that statue for Jerry Richardson a year before he was forced to sell the team when everything came out.

Then he put language into the sale of the team that prohibited the new owner from removing the statue.

Impossibly Perfect Sphere
Nov 6, 2002

They wasted Luanne on Lucky!

She could of have been so much more but the writers just didn't care!
My news feed teasing me Snyder Resigns.

https://www.espn.com/nba/story/_/id/34042961/utah-jazz-coach-quin-snyder-resigns-eight-seasons

Amy Pole Her
Jun 17, 2002
Who was the Commanders fan that was *still* defending Snyder after the airplane peanuts thing? Im trying to remember

Impossibly Perfect Sphere
Nov 6, 2002

They wasted Luanne on Lucky!

She could of have been so much more but the writers just didn't care!

Alaois
Feb 7, 2012

Amy Pole Her posted:

Who was the Commanders fan that was *still* defending Snyder after the airplane peanuts thing? Im trying to remember

you're asking us to remember all the way back to a time when this website had Washington fans

predicto
Jul 22, 2004

THE DEM DEFENDER HAS LOGGED ON

Alaois posted:

you're asking us to remember all the way back to a time when this website had Washington fans

:smith:

fartknocker
Oct 28, 2012


Damn it, this always happens. I think I'm gonna score, and then I never score. It's not fair.



Wedge Regret

Alaois posted:

you're asking us to remember all the way back to a time when this website had Washington fans

I’ll just assume it was A man and his dog because that wouldn’t be in the top 5 of dumb/horrible things he did.

Amy Pole Her
Jun 17, 2002

Alaois posted:

you're asking us to remember all the way back to a time when this website had Washington fans

Aw man

syzpid
Aug 9, 2014
Should rename the thread "Pick a new name for the Washington Commanders"

Racing Stripe
Oct 22, 2003

The Capitol Dustups

Racing Stripe
Oct 22, 2003

Or if they wanna be the only team in the league with punctuation (or maybe second with San Francisco) in the name, Dust-Ups.

Racing Stripe fucked around with this message at 18:26 on Jun 9, 2022

Shrimpy
May 18, 2004

Sir, I'm going to need to see your ticket.

Racing Stripe posted:

The Capitol Dustups

Even this is a better name than Commanders.

Red
Apr 15, 2003

Yeah, great at getting us into Wawa.

Racing Stripe posted:

The Capitol Dustups

Logo is Del Rio's head being swept into a dustpan

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Racing Stripe
Oct 22, 2003

Remember when he wore a suit on the sidelines that one time? That was cool. He should have stuck with doing that.

Edit: maybe that was mike nolan. It was a coach of a team that was bad circa 2008.

Racing Stripe fucked around with this message at 01:25 on Jun 10, 2022

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