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Convex posted:Having also worked cleaning toilets, the gents was the only time I have had to clean piss off the ceiling On the other hand, only in the ladies toilet have I had to clean off messages written on the mirror with a used tampon. (No I don't remember the message). And yeah just poo poo piss and vomit everywhere but the toilet. The gents did have a guy who liked to leave used colostomy bags on the floor right next to the bin tho. This was a student centre with a pub attached, God help the people cleaning up a big inner-city Wetherspoons or whatever E: excellent snipe, I'm so proud. 99 , a type of ice cream topped with a little chocolate flake
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Jul 5, 2022 09:25
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Once had 'this pub is poo poo' written on the wall in actual poo poo But yeah, the ladies is consistently the worst by a long margin
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Jul 5, 2022 09:31
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The mess in women's toilets is due to the constant stream of 30-50 feral trans women invading the women's space every minute. They helicopter their dicks around in dominance while peeing. Also the dicks are hard because going to the toilet is sex for them. Then they sacrifice a cis women in a satanic ritual in the sink and don't even clean up after. Nobody can report them because the police are all gay now and dont want to get cancelled on twitter
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Jul 5, 2022 09:37
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The mechanism seems to be: Guy pisses on the floor and seat a little bit > Next guy steps on the piss and does his thing>Repeat Lady pisses on the seat>Next lady hovers and pisses all over the seat and floor> Next lady hovers but starts pissing and making GBS threads from about 3 feet away>Repeat, as the radius expands Also, all genders get wankered drunk, but smaller women trying to drink the same as bigger people ending up in blackouts, headtheball behaviour, and terrible coordination E: actually strike all that, the post above is correct ^^°
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Jul 5, 2022 09:38
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Back in my student days, a housemate once felt nauseous before bedtime and after giving it a bit of time to wear off to no effect, decided to just make herself sick because then at least she wouldn't have to worry about being sick in the night. She went to the bathroom, put her fingers into her mouth, vomited... and missed the toilet bowl, spewing up over the carpet tiles. (She wasn't bulimic, just a bit stupid at times)
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Jul 5, 2022 09:43
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I dunno if I’m getting more sensitive with age but the almost seamless leap from “in-depth discussion of Boris Johnson’s blowjob” to “toilet disaster gender wars” has made the UKMT really challenging reading this week 
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Jul 5, 2022 09:51
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yeah working in a bar taught me the women's loo's is not the 'homer simpson in the executive toilets' i'd been lead to believe but is actually a nightmare temple to effluenzia the god of bodily fluids we once got called to a fight in the womens loos with two women rolling around on the floor in about an inch of pissvomit; took one look at it getting everywhere in their hair and just immediately noped out. stay with me until the day i die that
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Jul 5, 2022 09:53
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Bring back hanging but just for putting carpet in bathrooms
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Jul 5, 2022 09:54
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Angepain posted:The mess in women's toilets is due to the constant stream of 30-50 feral trans women invading the women's space every minute. They helicopter their dicks around in dominance while peeing. Also the dicks are hard because going to the toilet is sex for them. Then they sacrifice a cis women in a satanic ritual in the sink and don't even clean up after. Nobody can report them because the police are all gay now and dont want to get cancelled on twitter This is art.
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Jul 5, 2022 09:54
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They had to call the plumber at work once because the ladies loo was completely hosed because someone had been flushing sanitary products. Whole building utterly reeked for a week.
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Jul 5, 2022 09:56
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yeah the women's always floods faster because there's no sanitary bin so someone immediately flushes a pad etc and blocks the loos someone would repeatedly put plastic cups into the u bend in both male and female loos also, never understood what that was about other than being the maximum possible arse to everyone around you
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Jul 5, 2022 09:58
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Angepain posted:Bring back hanging but just for putting carpet in bathrooms When the thread was discussing the Tolkien quote about not being too quick to wish death on somebody, I was trying to think of a counterexample and this is it. Before moving to the UK I had never seen a carpeted bathroom and I still cannot conceive why any sane person would want one.
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Jul 5, 2022 10:01
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Just had the horrific thought of those old timey razor blade disposal tiles built into the wall, that just slowly fill the wall cavity with used razor blades because gently caress it, that's someone else's problem. Except for sanitary products.
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Jul 5, 2022 10:02
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SixFigureSandwich posted:When the thread was discussing the Tolkien quote about not being too quick to wish death on somebody, I was trying to think of a counterexample and this is it. Before moving to the UK I had never seen a carpeted bathroom and I still cannot conceive why any sane person would want one. In the 90s my family moved into a house last renovated in the 70s and the bathroom had bright blue shag carpeting. Deranged. e: basically this 
Necrothatcher fucked around with this message at 10:07 on Jul 5, 2022 |
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Jul 5, 2022 10:04
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SixFigureSandwich posted:When the thread was discussing the Tolkien quote about not being too quick to wish death on somebody, I was trying to think of a counterexample and this is it. Before moving to the UK I had never seen a carpeted bathroom and I still cannot conceive why any sane person would want one. When I lived in Philadelphia and desperately needed to move into a new flat I once viewed one that looked great and was available at a good price. I got all excited looking around until I got to the bathroom and found that it was entirely carpeted, with large black haloes on the green carpet around toilet, shower, and sink.
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Jul 5, 2022 10:10
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Another hand up for 'ladies loos always the worst'. Like the rougher lads would do some damage, break some pipes, leave a mess as some sort of message or warning for the staff. Total amateurs compared to the  at any random end of the night in the ladies.
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Jul 5, 2022 10:10
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When me & my wife got our first house, the first thing I did (before even moving in) was rip up the bathroom carpet and replace it with vinyl.
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Jul 5, 2022 10:11
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Actually bathroom carpet is a very prudent idea because after doing a poo poo, you can drag your rear end right there in the bathroom rather than going to find the rug in the living room.
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Jul 5, 2022 10:22
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JeremoudCorbynejad posted:Actually bathroom carpet is a very prudent idea because after doing a poo poo, you can drag your rear end right there in the bathroom rather than going to find the rug in the living room. I think you need your anal glands expressed. PM me
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Jul 5, 2022 10:29
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I think the reason for the the women’s being worse is that it’s basically an extension of the bar itself in so far as women hang out in there for extended periods (chortle chortle). Men tend to do their business and get out again, so less time for muckspreading. That, combined with women not being able to drink as much generally (but drinking as much nonetheless) and getting sloppier, makes for a recipe for disaster.
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Jul 5, 2022 10:30
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Jakabite posted:I think the reason for the the women’s being worse is that it’s basically an extension of the bar itself in so far as women hang out in there for extended periods (chortle chortle). Men tend to do their business and get out again, so less time for muckspreading. That, combined with women not being able to drink as much generally (but drinking as much nonetheless) and getting sloppier, makes for a recipe for disaster. no it's definitely the trans women and or immigrants
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Jul 5, 2022 10:32
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Necrothatcher posted:In the 90s my family moved into a house last renovated in the 70s and the bathroom had bright blue shag carpeting. Deranged. that's very fancy
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Jul 5, 2022 10:37
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jiggerypokery posted:no it's definitely the trans women and or immigrants Oh and all the people who grew up getting their brains wrapped by video nastiest. Aren't you glad they were banned now! If they hadn't all of the UK would currently be looking like the inside of the ladies toilets!!!
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Jul 5, 2022 10:38
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Bogs chat: I think I'm one of those rare women who is bemused by the whole seat up seat down discussion. If a man needs a seat up, lift it up. If a woman needs a seat down, put it down. Why is it supposedly better for a man to put it up than a woman to put it down? (This of course presupposes no-one messing on the seats). When I had a temp job early morning cleaning the bogs in a local pub, one time someone took a dump in a urinal and fortunately for me the (male) barstaff saw it the night before and dealt with it so I wouldn't arrive at work at 630am to be confronted with it. But yeah, on the whole, there's not a lot to choose between the average cleanliness of the Ladies v Gents bogs. Just tends to be of a slightly different nature though pee on the seats and poo poo on the back of the seat where someone's obviously exploded is common to both. Ladies' specials: Generally smeary bloody handprints on doors and walls (when there's no bog roll in the stall and you don't have tissues in your handbag or pocket), used hygiene wear on the floor or falling out of an overpacked hygiene bin Gents: pee all round the bog floor and oh the stench. I think men are more inclined to take a poo poo in public / work bogs than a woman. We had this very discussion at work because all the office based employees are currently women, we have a (almost certainly rule-breaking) tiny bog with hand sink leading directly off the kitchen in our incredibly ricketty old office space, so everyone is very conscious not to perform a No. 2 unless desperate, but apparently the last guy who worked there would sit in there for up to 20 minutes having his morning movement and stenching the place out (not great when stench goes immediately to kitchen - there is an extractor fan in the bog but it was overpowered). As to the terfy obsession with men disguised as women (ie their definition of 'trans') in the women's bogs - I don't get it at all. (1) it presupposes you can tell if someone is trans and bearing in mind some of those lunatics declared any woman over 5ft 5in was probably a man, (2) how on earth do they cope in environments where there is just the one bog servicing all of human kind in its many forms as in many shops, cafes, small offices, 'heritage' sites etc?
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Jul 5, 2022 10:44
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dr_rat posted:Oh and all the people who grew up getting their brains wrapped by video nastiest. It doesn't?
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Jul 5, 2022 10:45
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After hearing my colleagues joke about the horrors of 'Trap 3' I do not like the idea of desegregating our loos in case the phantom shitter migrates.
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Jul 5, 2022 10:52
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They think that when there is a little skirted stick figure on the door there is some magical forcefield that prevents y chromosones crossing the threshold
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Jul 5, 2022 10:53
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Necrothatcher posted:In the 90s my family moved into a house last renovated in the 70s and the bathroom had bright blue shag carpeting. Deranged. tbf it wasn't a ridiculous fear because sometimes those outhouse ones backflooded, and you don't immediately mentally account for height difference and improved s bends and so on when the topic is sewage flooding your house. What's far more puzzling is how quickly people got over that aversion to being ankle deep in filth that you don't even want one in the house straight to whatever that is  Angepain posted:The mess in women's toilets is due to the constant stream of 30-50 feral trans women invading the women's space every minute. They helicopter their dicks around in dominance while peeing. Also the dicks are hard because going to the toilet is sex for them. Then they sacrifice a cis women in a satanic ritual in the sink and don't even clean up after. Nobody can report them because the police are all gay now and dont want to get cancelled on twitter Failed Imagineer posted:The mechanism seems to be: 
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Jul 5, 2022 10:54
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Everybody should close the lid on the toilet after using it, that's what it's for, which necessitates putting the seat down.
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Jul 5, 2022 10:57
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Jaeluni Asjil posted:Bogs chat: I suspect this is one reason why men don't bother raising the seat when they pee, because the apoplectic fury that befalls any man who forgets probably conditions them to just not risk it. And there is an incredibly low survival rate for any man who says "okay, so just lower it then...?" which further selects for not risking a seat raise. E: obviously the solution is to just close the seat as Owl says, but apparently that's not an option for most people.
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Jul 5, 2022 10:59
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That'll just lead to people putting the lid down before using it.
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Jul 5, 2022 10:59
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Tried to find that viral story of the guy who always sat on the toilet rim because he thought the seat was for women only, instead found https://www.reddit.com/r/unpopularopinion/comments/gxx1g6/pooping_while_sitting_on_the_bare_rim_of_the/ quote:Pooping while sitting on the bare rim of the toilet is better than pooping while sitting on the toilet sit cover.
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Jul 5, 2022 11:02
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I cannot dispute that if you wedge your arse into the bowl to the point that it rolls aside your tissues for better ring exposure, that would indeed give better cheek separation.
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Jul 5, 2022 11:04
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Men don't raise the seat because a piss covered seat is someone else's problem, touching a seat (that might be piss'n'poo poo contaminated) is their problem. Sitting down is actually meant to be bad for making GBS threads. Hence the cult rise of the foot stool for better bowel opening.
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Jul 5, 2022 11:11
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OwlFancier posted:Everybody should close the lid on the toilet after using it, that's what it's for, which necessitates putting the seat down. Very many bogs have no lid.
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Jul 5, 2022 11:13
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One neat trick I learnt way too late is washing your rear end in a top hat is far superior to wiping and worth the extra time commitment
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Jul 5, 2022 11:16
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Jaeluni Asjil posted:Bogs chat: Because women can't pinch their urethra shut for a second while they adjust the seat. It's thus politer to leave the toilet ready for a woman to use in a hurry.
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Jul 5, 2022 11:17
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That reminds me of the story about the guy who refused to wipe because touching your butt is gay. https://www.reddit.com/r/gatekeeping/comments/iaoamq/real_men_dont_wipe_their_ass/ Unrelated to this, I've relistened to Jeff Wayne's War of the Worlds again for the first time in a few years and was surprised I'd never noticed just how much of a direct satire of fascism the artilleryman's song was. Like, I'd always understood that the point of the song is how unrealistic and detatched from reality the artilleryman has become, but for some reason I'd never quite picked up on how he's laying things out pretty much exactly how a fascist would describe their idealised society. Lots of good lines, but I think the funniest is "Everything we need: banks, prisons and schools." It's a good album.
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Jul 5, 2022 11:20
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Once again I've been tricked into thinking something has happened, only this time it's an extended discussion about the comparative amounts of piss, poo poo and vomit that get sprayed around male and female toilet cubicles.
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Jul 5, 2022 11:20
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Better than video game chat, I guess.
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Jul 5, 2022 11:21
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