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That day's litigation forecast: 50 to 100 percent chance of light malapropism
joat mon fucked around with this message at 13:21 on Jul 22, 2022 |
# ? Jul 22, 2022 13:19 |
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# ? Jun 6, 2024 09:16 |
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I guess he meant landmark?
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# ? Jul 22, 2022 13:53 |
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Maybe it's a negligence case on the Pacific Coast Highway?
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# ? Jul 22, 2022 16:11 |
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Phil Moscowitz posted:I guess he meant landmark? I think he meant landmark, yes, and he still would have been wrong
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# ? Jul 22, 2022 16:22 |
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I once worked on a case about a failing retaining wall. That could have been a landslide case.
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# ? Jul 22, 2022 17:56 |
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A landscape decision, a truly waterspout moment in the jurisprudence, which has now become brown-note law
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# ? Jul 22, 2022 18:45 |
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Phil Moscowitz posted:What did he think a “landslide” case was He saw his reflection in the snow covered hills
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# ? Jul 22, 2022 19:07 |
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Phil Moscowitz posted:A landscape decision, a truly waterspout moment in the jurisprudence, which has now become brown-note law Press conference to follow at the Four Seasons
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# ? Jul 22, 2022 19:46 |
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it's actually a mudslide case 'cause I'm getting hammered in court
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# ? Jul 22, 2022 21:16 |
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Y'all decide for yourselves what he meant, because as soon as I pointed out that the next page of his case contradicts his argument, he just tells the judge, "Well, I didn't actually read the case."
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# ? Jul 22, 2022 22:26 |
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loving LMAO
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# ? Jul 23, 2022 07:12 |
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blarzgh posted:Y'all decide for yourselves what he meant, because as soon as I pointed out that the next page of his case contradicts his argument, he just tells the judge, "Well, I didn't actually read the case." Lionel Hutz vibes And from opposing counsel, too!!!
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# ? Jul 23, 2022 07:17 |
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Law Megathread: So uh I didn't read on and on
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# ? Jul 23, 2022 16:15 |
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blarzgh posted:Y'all decide for yourselves what he meant, because as soon as I pointed out that the next page of his case contradicts his argument, he just tells the judge, "Well, I didn't actually read the case." This is amazing.
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# ? Jul 23, 2022 17:50 |
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New thread title, courtesy of a client who came in to sign documents: “See that after his name, ‘Esquire’? It means expensive.”
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# ? Jul 29, 2022 12:53 |
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Toona the Cat posted:New thread title, courtesy of a client who came in to sign documents: “See that after his name, ‘Esquire’? It means expensive.” Putting esquire in a document actually means "douche."
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# ? Jul 29, 2022 14:10 |
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Pook Good Mook posted:Putting esquire in a document actually means "douche." Oh boy, this argument again.
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# ? Jul 29, 2022 14:29 |
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Muir posted:Oh boy, this argument again. We could talk about spacing after periods if you'd like?
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# ? Jul 29, 2022 14:35 |
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Pook Good Mook posted:Putting esquire in a document actually means "douche." Putting esquire on your credit card may top that, and yes, I've seen it.
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# ? Jul 29, 2022 14:46 |
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Pook Good Mook posted:We could talk about spacing after periods if you'd like? I use double reflexively because that's how I learned to type, but then when I'm finished I'll do a find and replace all " " with " ".
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# ? Jul 29, 2022 15:09 |
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Yeah, but then you have the olds who also mark information to be filled with blank spaces which are literally a series of spaces so you do that and gently caress up the document.
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# ? Jul 29, 2022 15:13 |
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dpkg chopra posted:Yeah, but then you have the olds who also mark information to be filled with blank spaces which are literally a series of spaces so you do that and gently caress up the document. All of my olds had me print stuff and they'd handwrite on it.
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# ? Jul 29, 2022 15:20 |
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Tell me you work for a lawyer without telling me you work for a lawyer
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# ? Jul 29, 2022 15:30 |
dpkg chopra posted:Yeah, but then you have the olds who also mark information to be filled with blank spaces which are literally a series of spaces so you do that and gently caress up the document. Yeah, but then you have documents that are edited by more than one old. So some tabs are tabs, some are auto format, some are five spaces, and some are six spaces. And double spacing, to some, is literally hitting enter twice between single space lines of text, or extra spacing after paragraphs, or no spacing after paragraphs, or combinations thereof that change from line to line. And they love to Capitalize Words for no reason. And then they'll call IT because Word is broken again. This is my life every single day.
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# ? Jul 29, 2022 15:32 |
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BigHead posted:Yeah, but then you have documents that are edited by more than one old. So some tabs are tabs, some are auto format, some are five spaces, and some are six spaces. And double spacing, to some, is literally hitting enter twice between single space lines of text, or extra spacing after paragraphs, or no spacing after paragraphs, or combinations thereof that change from line to line. And they love to Capitalize Words for no reason. And then they'll call IT because Word is broken again. I had a conversation with my legal assistant a while ago where we were talking about careers and issues we were having and my assistant said something like, "I'm just here to make you look good" and all I could think was how much easier I was to replace compared to her. The amount of poo poo a good legal assistant/secretary puts up with, and then you add asinine specific poo poo about formatting unique to each attorney, I'm surprised they aren't unionized.
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# ? Jul 29, 2022 15:56 |
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Pook Good Mook posted:Putting esquire in a document actually means "douche." I'm required by local rules have Esq. and my bar number in my signature block in legal documents.
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# ? Jul 29, 2022 17:06 |
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Toona the Cat posted:I'm required by local rules have Esq. and my bar number in my signature block in legal documents. quote:Putting esquire in a document actually means "douche."
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# ? Jul 29, 2022 17:39 |
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Toona the Cat posted:I'm required by local rules have Esq. and my bar number in my signature block in legal documents. And this is why I think people critiquing people for using Esq. is dumb. Some people do it because they're self-important douches, sure, but other people do it because that's the prevailing custom in their area or field, or because they're required to.
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# ? Jul 29, 2022 17:43 |
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Toona the Cat posted:I'm required by local rules have Esq. and my bar number in my signature block in legal documents. hosed up
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# ? Jul 29, 2022 18:22 |
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Muir posted:And this is why I think people critiquing people for using Esq. is dumb. Some people do it because they're self-important douches, sure, but other people do it because that's the prevailing custom in their area or field, or because they're required to. I was being a bit extreme in my original post, but I appreciate the clarification by Toona. For what it's worth, I was more referring to uses of Esq. in entirely unnecessary contexts. Like a business card where you're already identified as an Attorney.
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# ? Jul 29, 2022 18:45 |
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Pook Good Mook posted:I was being a bit extreme in my original post, but I appreciate the clarification by Toona. No, this was on an actual court filing.
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# ? Jul 29, 2022 20:17 |
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Pook Good Mook posted:For what it's worth, I was more referring to uses of Esq. in entirely unnecessary contexts. Like a business card where you're already identified as an Attorney. "Rising" is the Esq. of law school.
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# ? Jul 29, 2022 21:23 |
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The Dog Lawyer Doesn’t Care That You Hate Him https://www.nytimes.com/2022/07/29/nyregion/dog-lawyer.html?referringSource=articleShare Lol at the idea that there's lawyers that care if you hate them.
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# ? Jul 29, 2022 23:33 |
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Toona the Cat posted:I'm required by local rules have Esq. and my bar number in my signature block in legal documents. When decency is illegal, then only the outlaws will have decency.
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# ? Jul 30, 2022 21:40 |
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BigHead posted:Yeah, but then you have documents that are edited by more than one old. So some tabs are tabs, some are auto format, some are five spaces, and some are six spaces. And double spacing, to some, is literally hitting enter twice between single space lines of text, or extra spacing after paragraphs, or no spacing after paragraphs, or combinations thereof that change from line to line. And they love to Capitalize Words for no reason. And then they'll call IT because Word is broken again. I swear to God I’m the only attorney in my group that knows the differences between section break, page break and slamming the enter key 50 times and it drives me up the loving wall.
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# ? Jul 31, 2022 05:10 |
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Love to spend an hour perfecting a list with styles so that I don’t have to manually set tabs everywhere or make the table of contents by hand only to have some rear end in a top hat just manually insert new lists. Word really needs to let you lock down formatting options.
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# ? Jul 31, 2022 05:14 |
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Just dictate it and let your lady put it on paper. Kids these days, I tell you what
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# ? Jul 31, 2022 16:47 |
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Hello. We are having issues with our property manager (we rent). Is this a thread ti ask about legal advice on what rights we have as renters ?
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# ? Jul 31, 2022 20:20 |
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Duckman2008 posted:Hello. Absolutely, so long as you post in norwegian because you can only get norwegian legal advice here for legal reasons. Så hva er problemet ditt? *tisser nervøst*
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# ? Jul 31, 2022 20:25 |
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# ? Jun 6, 2024 09:16 |
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So where do I start? We have been in our current place 1.5 years. Pay rent on time , don’t cause any noise or disturbances or whatever , no issues. We were offered and renewed our lease last March. My wife put out a free little library next to our mailbox a year ago. More on that in a bit. I’ve met our land lord, who seems fine, but most of our interactions are with the property manager who the landlord pays to handle the property. It’s a property group, so it’s not like one dude, it’s a company but we’re one of his. So last week. He messages “hey I need to stop by for a standard house inspection, can I stop by Tuesday.” Yeah sure. So I’m not expecting anything but he comes in and like, checks the smoke alarms. Big mistake, but I’ve had nothing but positive interactions with him so why would I expect anything. This dude comes in, is super cold, walks through my house taking pictures. I’m like, in shock and don’t know what to do. Now, we’re a bit messy, and my wife has had sickness off and on, so realistically, I would have told you the place was very messy. Not dirty, but cloths on the floor, stuff in boxes, etc. piles of clothes in the bedroom. But that said, I will say it isn’t dirty, we don’t have issues with bugs, mice, whatever. Like, to me , even if it’s messy, we would certainly clear up before we ever move out. So we go out to the backyard, and the dude is like “ok, so we got notices from the CSA that they are going to start sending fines to the landlord. Theres a free library next to your mailbox, garden materials at the back of the driveway, it’s not HOA code . We are going to give you 30 days to take down the outside stuff and clean up the entire house. “ Tbh, I’ve never had an issue before with landlords (fortunately), so I was in shock. I just said sure, it’ll be fine, we’ll clean and let him go on his way. Few things happened since then: -my wife posted the free library up for giveaway on Facebook, which got shared with the private community page (with her permission). -from all that, long story short the HOA board members start responding. Turns out, they are not aware of any complaints -my wife put up a curtain that said “choose love” to block our one window , because we’re starting to get creeped out someone is looking in on us. 2 days afterwards, our property manager emails us saying “I got another email from the HOA, you have to pull the library and the curtain you put up immediately. This is a BIG flag. Who the gently caress is looking at our house and sending a complaint within 2 days. Anyway, we’ve had actually really nice conversations with the HOA people, I have a call with the head of the HOA tonight. Like, they are like “well there are rules so we would have to vote on stuff,” but we’re just trying to figure out who is harassing us. It’s one of two possibilities: 1. Someone is pretending they have authority at the HOA to send out fines and sending out fake threatening emails to our property manager 2. Our property manager made the whole HOA complaints up to try and control us. I thought all week it was 1, but here’s the kicker. The house across from us just went up for rental and got new renters. As in they moved in this week. So the theory we have now, is the property manager naturally was in the area showing the place, drove by and looked in through our windows , decided that he did not like that it was messy, and made all this poo poo up to attack us and get us to clean up or whatever. Plus, he now has pictures, so I’m sure that means that if we leave in March they’ll try and gently caress with our deposit. It’s just weird. He doesn’t own the place, so I don’t get why he would care the place is messy. We haven’t ripped up the house or moved anything around. My wife planted a small garden. But that’s like, it. Anyway, so now the fear is the dude is going to come harassing us after 30 days , try to come in our house, try to get us evicted, whatever. Any advice on what we can do and what our rights are is appreciated. I’ve found a local lawyer who works with this I will likely be reaching out to this week, we’re going to protect ourselves.
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# ? Jul 31, 2022 20:50 |