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Why do you read this thread anyway?
This poll is closed.
I enjoy reading contemporary newspaper comics. 64 26.02%
I hate reading contemporary newspaper comics. 42 17.07%
I enjoy reading historical newspaper comics. 88 35.77%
I enjoy reading newspaper comics from foreign countries. 52 21.14%
Total: 246 votes
[Edit Poll (moderators only)]

 
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Hippocrass
Aug 18, 2015

That third panel of the first comic just makes it. It's still funny if you remove it, but that panel included just makes it top tier.

Tiggum posted:

So 25-years-old, not 60 (or even 35) and not in working condition?

It was in perfect working condition.

Except for the breaks, but who need those?

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Shaman Tank Spec
Dec 26, 2003

*blep*



The rare no translation needed Fingerpori

Selachian
Oct 9, 2012

Carroti



Rhymes with Orange



Get Fuzzy 8/14/02



Brenda Starr 4/11-13/49




(problem with the original scan in the second panel there)



Smokey Stover 7/24/49



Everyday Movies 6/21/35



"We'd like to be in on your chain letter, but up where we live we don't have government mail boxes, so it would be kind of impossible to get those letters with the money in them."

(Chain letters were, and as far as I know still are, used as vehicles for small-scale pyramid schemes of the "send a dollar to the first person on this list, add your address, and send copies of this letter to ten people" sort.)

manero
Jan 30, 2006

Nancy 1947



Errrr yikes

The_Other
Dec 28, 2012

Welcome Back, Galaxy Geek.
Solver: Green Door in which a familiar (to Giant Days fans) face appears!

John Allison's Patreon John Allison's Gumroad store
Steeple website

John Allison posted:

DEAN THOMPSON! A stalwart of the Giant Days series (in many ways everyone’s favourite character), but eight years have passed and in the meantime he has been given responsibility for children. Astonishing.

ITEM! Enjoy today’s the special programming joke just for computer likers.

So Dean Thompson was, as Allison says, a semi-regular character during the Giant Days comic. Thompson was, at best, tolerated by the main cast due to the fact that he is self-absorbed jerkass that occasionally had knowledge or skills that the others needed. Basically a smarter, human Des Fishman.

Medenmath
Jan 18, 2003

Hippocrass posted:

It was in perfect working condition.

Except for the breaks, but who need those?

As I recall from old TV shows, breaks weren't standard on cars from that era anyway. You stopped your car by sticking your feet through a hole in the floor.

Vintage Valiant (Oct. 05, 1952)


goatface
Dec 5, 2007

I had a video of that when I was about 6.

I remember it being shit.


Grimey Drawer
Those are some good "I am beginning to regret my actions" faces there.

Vargo
Dec 27, 2008

'Cuz it's KILLIN' ME!
Breaking Cat News


Phoebe and Her Unicorn


Wallace the Brave


Heart of the City


Curtis


Wait, but ribs, wings, and I guess fries are all also organic-based. Also, Curtis got chicken on his salad (even if Billingsley didn't bother to draw it), it's a chicken Cesar salad, why would a chicken wing be any different? Billingsley, it's okay to not know what words mean.

Doomykins
Jun 28, 2008

Didn't you mean to ask about flowers?
I'm more interested in the reveal that yes, Gunk has solved world hunger with magic.

JethroMcB
Jan 23, 2004

We're normal now.
We love your family.
every time I get a text message I look at my phone and say



out loud, to myself, as is the tradition of my people


o no I liked/agreed with a Dustin

Hippocrass posted:

This is where different rules for bike riding in different places ruins the joke. I couldn't say how it is in a bigger city, but where I am, only children are allowed to ride on sidewalks. Adults are required to ride on the street But I'm in a smaller city, which insists it's still a town. I don't know what bike rules are like in Calgary. Maybe this hits better in cities.

The key here is that it's in America, the land of greedy inconsiderate shitheads. I live in a (relatively) small town with dedicated bike lanes in the streets and I still encounter somebody bombing down the sidewalk on a bike on a weekly basis. We had those rental electric scooters for like a week five years ago and they were an absolute nightmare by the afternoon of day freaking one; they say "Street use only" on both the physical scooter and the app you used to unlock them, but what you got in reality was a string of helmetless college kids blasting past you at 15 MPH shouting "ON YOUR LEFT" when they were maybe 5 feet away

goatface
Dec 5, 2007

I had a video of that when I was about 6.

I remember it being shit.


Grimey Drawer
There are kids round here who ride their electric dirtbikes through pedestrianised shopping areas. They're little shits.

Poil
Mar 17, 2007

Seems like they've been a total pain globally wherever they've been unleashed. :argh:

maltesh
May 20, 2004

Uncle Ben: Still Dead.
They showed up near my apartment complex earlier this year. Every time I go out, I see scooters and e- bikes that users have left in the middle of sidewalks and walkways, or in one case, one of the handicapped parking spots.

Haven't encountered anyone actually riding one, but I 'm usually not on the sidewalks myself.

Strontium
Aug 28, 2009

Dexter didn't much care for the party.
Daddy Daze


Take It From the Tinkersons


Macanudo


Dark Side of the Horse

Powered Descent
Jul 13, 2008

We haven't had that spirit here since 1969.

Bizarro

Is that Teller? I bet he'd be a good listener.

The Family Circus




Get well soon, riderchop! Here's your usual comics:

Heathcliff


Compu-toon


Garfield


Overboard


Monty


For Better or For Worse


Classic Arlo and Janis (September 7, 2000)


Rae The Doe


On The Fastrack


Safe Havens

Mister Beeg
Sep 7, 2012

A Certified Jerk
Arnold (May 23-29, 1983)








I think that third strip may be the first time somebody other than Arnold, Tommy, Mr. Lester, or Heather has spoken, abet off-screen. This will become standard as the strip continues, where other characters will technically speak in the strip, but they're off-screen. Some of those off-screen speaking characters will become regulars, like the cafeteria ladies (whom Arnold has a grudge against), Arnold and Tommy's parents, some of the family members Arnold always talks about, and school faculty members that aren't Mr. Lester.

You may have noticed that the girl character, Heather, stopped appearing. She still has couple more appearances left, but come 1984 she went the way of Lyman. A new fourth character would eventually be introduced, but only during the strip's final year, so I won't spoil for the time being.

goatface
Dec 5, 2007

I had a video of that when I was about 6.

I remember it being shit.


Grimey Drawer
We respect boundaries here, let me teach you that fact by forcibly transforming you into a sapient inanimate object without warning.

Obnoxipus
Apr 4, 2011

"we respect boundaries," she says, forcibly transforming him into a sapient plant who is incapable of leaving the situation he is in.

e: f;b

OneMoreTime
Feb 20, 2011

*quack*


What the gently caress Safe Havens

Malachite_Dragon
Mar 31, 2010

Weaving Merry Christmas magic
We respect boundaries, by which I mean you respect boundaries; I do as I please.

Darthemed
Oct 28, 2007

"A data unit?
For me?
"




College Slice
Docks




Retail




Popcom


EasyEW
Mar 8, 2006

I've got my father's great big six-shooter with me 'n' if anybody in this woods wants to start somethin' just let 'em--but they DASSN'T.
Mutts


Sally Forth


Skippy (October 26, 1934)


Peanuts (August 18, 1975)


Oh no. OH NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO.


Crankshaft


Mutt and Jeff


Rip Haywire


Thimble Theater (March 16, 1939)


Out Our Way (August 3-5, 1939)




Murdstone
Jun 14, 2005

I'm feeling Jimmy


Hostile V posted:

It's always weird to me when people write the phrase "voila" phonetically.
When I was a kid I read a Garfield strip where they used 'voila" and I thought they were saying "viola" and I just had never heard of that term used in that way.

I actually remember the strip vividly. It's weird. It was a guy describing to Garfield how potato chips are made. I think it was Jon's father on the family farm. Garfield expressed disappointment that the magic is gone when you know how something is made, if I remember right. That's the joke.
Hey it's Tippie!

F Minus



Mark Trail



Mary Worth



"What a crazy dream for me, a 20-year-old, to have! I better go talk to my elderly neighbor!"

The Phantom



Pooch Cafe



Rex Morgan MD



In case you're curious about Adolphe Menjou.

Andertoons



Apartment 3-G



Looks like CK is skipping a week, as this is dated 2/7, when it should be 1/31.

Powered Descent
Jul 13, 2008

We haven't had that spirit here since 1969.

Murdstone posted:

The Phantom



https://i.imgur.com/8j5mJ5b.mp4

JethroMcB
Jan 23, 2004

We're normal now.
We love your family.

Zamboni Rodeo posted:

Jesus Christ, GET ON WITH IT!

Murdstone posted:

Rex Morgan MD



lol no now we're apparently going to watch them watch a movie on TV (though the narration feels...ominous.)

EasyEW posted:

Oh no. OH NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO.




Font match 100% didn't work here. But the sentiment remains.

goatface
Dec 5, 2007

I had a video of that when I was about 6.

I remember it being shit.


Grimey Drawer
They remembered that they have another character who serves as a shoehorn for Lisa stories.

They might have had to look at the Funky canon-bible to remember her name.

kidcoelacanth
Sep 23, 2009

davidspackage
May 16, 2007

Nap Ghost

Phantom: OH COME ON that does not happen

Mozz: *finishes writing it down* says it right here, Oh Ghost. "The assassin pisses on the Phantom's face. Some goes in his mouth. It tastes really suspicious."

Zereth
Jul 9, 2003



Tiggum posted:

How did he even get that van? Even back in 1997 it seems like a 35-year-old vehicle in working condition and available for cheap would have been an unlikely find. Right? But now it's more like 60 years old. And as the characters never age, that means he bought it within the last year or two; certainly not in 1997, as he wouldn't be born for another decade.
As I recall from somebody posting early Zits, it was very much not in working condition when he bought it.

Doomykins
Jun 28, 2008

Didn't you mean to ask about flowers?
I'm almost in awe of how dedicated Mark Trail is to cycling through its worst qualities. That narration box ruins the punchline and takes up almost 40% of the panel real estate, nearly half of it when all you had to do was draw Rex's facial expression, maybe give him the dialogue punch.

Jucika "400 - Jucika, As A Witness"


"401 - Jucika Is A Little Vain"

Crab Dad
Dec 28, 2002

behold i have tempered and refined thee, but not as silver; as CRAB


Zereth posted:

As I recall from somebody posting early Zits, it was very much not in working condition when he bought it.

Yeah it was up on blocks and they camped out in it.

Vox Valentine
May 31, 2013

Solving all of life's problems through enhanced casting of Occam's Razor. Reward yourself with an imaginary chalice.

GRELB, HOMP, FLEEM, JARLD, FRISH, BRAPT, KFLANG

coronatae
Oct 14, 2012


From a few day ago but this has singlehandedly transcended every stupid onomatopoeia in FOOB. Soon's I have some extra $ that octopus is going to be my new av

flergh

Lowen SoDium
Jun 5, 2003

Highen Fiber
Clapping Larry

Murdstone posted:

When I was a kid I read a Garfield strip where they used 'voila" and I thought they were saying

The Phantom




Have they ever shown the Phantom's eyes before?

goatface
Dec 5, 2007

I had a video of that when I was about 6.

I remember it being shit.


Grimey Drawer
He has to kill that lady now.

And all the readers.

Rand Brittain
Mar 25, 2013

"Go on until you're stopped."
Presumably that means he is no longer the Phantom.

Powered Descent
Jul 13, 2008

We haven't had that spirit here since 1969.

Lowen SoDium posted:

Have they ever shown the Phantom's eyes before?

I'm pretty certain they have not.

This would be a much bigger deal if (once again) any of it was actually happening.

Yvonmukluk
Oct 10, 2012

Everything is Sinister


Bad Machinery

Kennel
May 1, 2008

BAWWW-UNH!
Mozz: You lift your blue eyes and...
Walker: My eyes are brown.
Mozz: Well how could I know, dammit!

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Sundae
Dec 1, 2005

Kennel posted:

Mozz: You lift your blue eyes and...
Walker: My eyes are brown.
Mozz: Well how could I know, dammit!

If the next step of this is "omg it's my lover-boy's eyes, I shot his dad, gotta get him to help pronto!" followed by Mozz being like "and so you ruined your son's relationship too, along with everything else, and then you shat yourself as you died," I swear I'm gonna...

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