(Thread IKs:
Josherino)
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unwantedplatypus has issued a correction as of 02:37 on Nov 20, 2022 |
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Nov 20, 2022 02:19
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thehandtruck posted:if ur depressed no amount of logic or words or ideas is going to make you enjoy things. thats why people's words/advice fall flat. all the logic uve created around Not Healing is depression-brain, and wrong. doesnt mean the material conditions arent true, but the logic you've scaffolded around it, ur brain thinks is infallible, when really its wrong. i know cause ive been in there many times. if ur an addict u have addiction to excitement/fear (the exact compliment to fear of boredom, which uve described). and if ur an addict......NA is free. ACA is free. etc. depression brain probably has some infallible logic why those wont work either, but hopefully that gives you perspective how depression brain has spread and presented itself as logical part of brain. Yeah it's kinda like how one of the symptoms of dehydration is not wanting to drink water- the illness makes it harder to treat itself I think I've been having some physical issues that are bleeding into mental health, I've had a couple digestive issues over the past couple of days and I suspect that it's been causing a lot of tension and fatigue. Hate having to sort out what exactly is making me feel like poo poo, and the general feeling that my body is betraying me
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Nov 21, 2022 19:58
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StashAugustine posted:Yeah it's kinda like how one of the symptoms of dehydration is not wanting to drink water- the illness makes it harder to treat itself drat thats such a good analogy. gonna steal that thanks. ive found for myself depression always got worse by trying to make it go away. going away meant doing happy things. it never worked. but sitting with it and making small improvements to the rest of my life, like eating right, very light exercise, sleeping well, etc, all without trying to push away the depression, was the only thing that ever "worked" for me.
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Nov 21, 2022 23:19
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There's people in my apartment working on outlets now and I loving hate it. I didn't get any notice, just the super calling 15 minutes before they start when I'm already at work and can't do anything about it or drop back. I left my brain pills and bong out and I hope nobody helps themselves to anything, and I really just don't like the idea of people up in my place and my business in general. I don't want your help, I don't want you here, I don't care what the loving building inspector said. I had a feeling this was going to happen, but because I relaxed I didn't take steps to hide that stuff yesterday because I thought they were done already. I feel like I can't ever relax because I have to consider every possible angle I can be hit at all times, nothing feels safe, everything feels like it could just be taken away tomorrow and I have no recourse. A thread will get pulled and it will all unravel. I can barely even pivot away from working to handle whatever random demands come up so I'm just stuck here waiting for the hit to come. Like, imagine if this start the chain that leads to me getting evicted or something.
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Nov 22, 2022 00:23
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skooma512 posted:There's people in my apartment working on outlets now and I loving hate it. I didn't get any notice, just the super calling 15 minutes before they start when I'm already at work and can't do anything about it or drop back. I left my brain pills and bong out and I hope nobody helps themselves to anything, and I really just don't like the idea of people up in my place and my business in general. I don't want your help, I don't want you here, I don't care what the loving building inspector said. I had a feeling this was going to happen, but because I relaxed I didn't take steps to hide that stuff yesterday because I thought they were done already. I feel like I can't ever relax because I have to consider every possible angle I can be hit at all times, nothing feels safe, everything feels like it could just be taken away tomorrow and I have no recourse. A thread will get pulled and it will all unravel. I can barely even pivot away from working to handle whatever random demands come up so I'm just stuck here waiting for the hit to come. Like, imagine if this start the chain that leads to me getting evicted or something. You didn't do anything wrong and your landlord is almost certainly breaking the law and/or your lease with that kind of poo poo. If they tried to evict you because of stuff they found on a no-notice entrance to your home they'd be in immeasurably deeper poo poo than you would be if you were to decide to protect yourself legally, and they probably know that. Also, generally speaking, supers care about stuff way less than the actual landlord. Not to say your concerns aren't valid or justified, just saying that it will probably fine. When I end up turning myself into a ball of knots over something that's unlikely I like to remind myself that I'm already dead in the future so everything right now is just bonus time. Usually helps bring me down a little bit or starts on a path of self doubt and existential panic, but either of those seem better than worrying about your landlord.
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Nov 22, 2022 00:57
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fanfic insert has issued a correction as of 16:41 on Nov 22, 2022 |
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Nov 22, 2022 09:18
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having my ex stay with me for a while after she left her abusive partner. she has, over the past few years, developed a debilitating anxiety and sometimes just sits there shaking. i don't really know what to do to help her feel less anxious because i don't have these issues and can't really relate at all. any advice is appreciated.
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Nov 22, 2022 16:43
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skooma512 posted:There's people in my apartment working on outlets now and I loving hate it. I didn't get any notice, just the super calling 15 minutes before they start when I'm already at work and can't do anything about it or drop back. I left my brain pills and bong out and I hope nobody helps themselves to anything, and I really just don't like the idea of people up in my place and my business in general. I don't want your help, I don't want you here, I don't care what the loving building inspector said. I had a feeling this was going to happen, but because I relaxed I didn't take steps to hide that stuff yesterday because I thought they were done already. I feel like I can't ever relax because I have to consider every possible angle I can be hit at all times, nothing feels safe, everything feels like it could just be taken away tomorrow and I have no recourse. A thread will get pulled and it will all unravel. I can barely even pivot away from working to handle whatever random demands come up so I'm just stuck here waiting for the hit to come. Like, imagine if this start the chain that leads to me getting evicted or something. I feel this. I don't have anything potentially incriminating out (usually) but I still absolutely despise the idea that anyone my rear end in a top hat property manager decides can come in my apartment any time. yes, I know the laws about notice etc, but we all know they don't care. I've had bad experiences with landlords in the past with harassment and giving me 14-day notices because of poo poo that absolutely wasn't true, and it's given me tons of anxiety about renting and landlords ever since. did everything turn out ok this time?
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Nov 22, 2022 16:52
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Crusty Nutsack posted:I feel this. I don't have anything potentially incriminating out (usually) but I still absolutely despise the idea that anyone my rear end in a top hat property manager decides can come in my apartment any time. yes, I know the laws about notice etc, but we all know they don't care. I've had bad experiences with landlords in the past with harassment and giving me 14-day notices because of poo poo that absolutely wasn't true, and it's given me tons of anxiety about renting and landlords ever since. Yeah it turned out fine. I have two new GFCI outlets because the inspector noticed they weren't and that's not code compliant. Nothing seemed to be missing, but I have ADD so half my poo poo is missing at any given time lol.
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Nov 23, 2022 00:55
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had the strangest, most productive and maybe uplifting experience at the VA today. I saw my primary care doc who helped me with physical stuff but when I mentioned my mental health she said another department was working on it and so she couldn’t start prescribing well, minutes later my counselor called me asking me to come to her office. it took a few hours but I am seeing a psych tomorrow at 830. it feels so good when you can tell people are fighting for you
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Nov 23, 2022 00:59
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Consummate Professional posted:had the strangest, most productive and maybe uplifting experience at the VA today. I saw my primary care doc who helped me with physical stuff but when I mentioned my mental health she said another department was working on it and so she couldn’t start prescribing that's excellent news. grats.
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Nov 23, 2022 08:42
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Sherbert Hoover posted:having my ex stay with me for a while after she left her abusive partner. she has, over the past few years, developed a debilitating anxiety and sometimes just sits there shaking. i don't really know what to do to help her feel less anxious because i don't have these issues and can't really relate at all. any advice is appreciated. probably sit with her while she calls RAINN (if she wants you to obviously). if she isnt able to its not too much for you to call them and ask for advice or help. then sleep well knowing ur a good person
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Nov 23, 2022 19:21
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Sherbert Hoover posted:having my ex stay with me for a while after she left her abusive partner. she has, over the past few years, developed a debilitating anxiety and sometimes just sits there shaking. i don't really know what to do to help her feel less anxious because i don't have these issues and can't really relate at all. any advice is appreciated. All you can really do is sit with her and be available. Seems like she needs some professional help so maybe gently encourage her in that direction?
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Nov 26, 2022 11:58
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hey gang. saw the new psych who is maybe the kindest doctor I have ever met. he walked me through the different options of medicine out there to help and we decided on Wellbutrin with a possible long term goal of reducing my zoloft prescription since it kills any form of libido I have. I also got my blood test info back and my thyroid may not be doing what it’s supposed to? I’m going to follow up with my primary doc to see if there’s more going on than just sad brains
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Nov 26, 2022 21:08
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Hey people. I've suffered with depression and anxiety since I was 15 (I'm now 36) and it got ten times worse over Covid lockdown and has left me with a weird kind of intermittent agoraphobia. I also have insomnia like never before. I like awake all night, sometimes fighting off debilitating panic attacks, and spend the rest of the day like a zombie. I'm unable to work for the last two years because of it all and have tried everything from medications to counselling to weird fad diets... I've stopped drinking alcohol almost entirely (though never had a problem with it) and drink my 2l of water a day. But I'm having constant headaches and just want to sleep. I've taken to "sleeping" on the sofa in order to avoid disturbing my wife when I toss and turn all night. I have barely left the house in months and even the most mundane trips out drive terror into me. I don't even know what I'm asking... Has anyone suffered similar and what do you suggest if so? The sleep thing is the thing killing me lately. I am so zoned out 24/7, I sleep in hour-long bursts when my body and mind just give up. Sometimes it's at 11pm, sometimes 11am, etc. I can often go days without sleep followed by days in bed. Help. Edit: my wife is a full-time carer for her schizophrenic diabetic mum, and has her own depression issues. She's incredibly supportive but understandably unequipped to offer solutions. She's amazing as someone who listens and understands though. Prole has issued a correction as of 07:33 on Nov 27, 2022 |
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Nov 27, 2022 07:30
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Prole posted:Hey people. I've suffered with depression and anxiety since I was 15 (I'm now 36) and it got ten times worse over Covid lockdown and has left me with a weird kind of intermittent agoraphobia. I also have insomnia like never before. I like awake all night, sometimes fighting off debilitating panic attacks, and spend the rest of the day like a zombie. I'm unable to work for the last two years because of it all and have tried everything from medications to counselling to weird fad diets... I've stopped drinking alcohol almost entirely (though never had a problem with it) and drink my 2l of water a day. But I'm having constant headaches and just want to sleep. My social anxiety has shot up with covid. It's gotten so bad that I have trouble going to the store on my own. I've been getting better though. Exposure works... but it's still unpleasant. I've had issues with sleep too. Physical exercise has helped a lot, even just a 20 minute walk after supper. I don't like recommending it but weed has helped me sleep too. Sleep problems are hell, I'm sorry you have to deal with them.
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Nov 27, 2022 19:00
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802.11weed posted:My social anxiety has shot up with covid. It's gotten so bad that I have trouble going to the store on my own. I've been getting better though. Exposure works... but it's still unpleasant. I tried weed but as a guy who hasn't really done drugs of any kind since my early 20s I didn't really want to stick to that. I find popping a Mirtazapine helps, though my doc won't prescribe them for insomnia. And they make me feel like poo poo the day after. I've even tried herbal poo poo like marshmallow leaf etc. No luck. I'm either wide awake or too zoned out by tiredness to function. Codeine also helped but that's a slippery slope because I feel withdrawal symptoms when I stop taking them after just a couple of days taking them to help me sleep. Thanks for your well wishes.
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Nov 27, 2022 20:12
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Can't sleep, clown'll eat me Don't do this, but I find this effective. Variety of sleeping drugs, taken 2 or 3 simultaneously, rotated to prevent tolerance building. Like, a few days of mirtazipine with diphenhydramine, then a few days with weed and dextromethrophan. Or all of those in tiny doses. Add alcohol to taste. If I missed any good over the counter stuff please someone do share. As a kid I typically would not sleep. Later I would to take massive doses of one or another to get broken sleep, huge side effects, and eventually another addiction. Now I take way less and sleep within an hour regardless of what's bugging me. I feel better the next day (no massive hangover or weed grogginess/paranoia), and feel like I can skip days without uncomfortable withdrawals. Being able to function better at work and even talk to a person without looking drowsy and corpselike has me feeling unusually good. Haven't called in sick for a while either. Obviously fixing one's issues would be ideal, but sleep feels like a prerequisite for that. I figure doctors tell you not to mix drugs out of fear of liability/concern for your safety that you will have an episode and OD on them all at once.
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Nov 27, 2022 20:14
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Prole posted:Hey people. I've suffered with depression and anxiety since I was 15 (I'm now 36) and it got ten times worse over Covid lockdown and has left me with a weird kind of intermittent agoraphobia. I also have insomnia like never before. I like awake all night, sometimes fighting off debilitating panic attacks, and spend the rest of the day like a zombie. I'm unable to work for the last two years because of it all and have tried everything from medications to counselling to weird fad diets... I've stopped drinking alcohol almost entirely (though never had a problem with it) and drink my 2l of water a day. But I'm having constant headaches and just want to sleep. I've taken to "sleeping" on the sofa in order to avoid disturbing my wife when I toss and turn all night. I have barely left the house in months and even the most mundane trips out drive terror into me. I don't even know what I'm asking... Has anyone suffered similar and what do you suggest if so? The sleep thing is the thing killing me lately. I am so zoned out 24/7, I sleep in hour-long bursts when my body and mind just give up. Sometimes it's at 11pm, sometimes 11am, etc. I can often go days without sleep followed by days in bed. Help. 1) find a psychiatrist 2) find a therapist. request the psych and therapist consult 3) stop drinking. if u cant go to aa
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Nov 27, 2022 21:08
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Prole posted:Hey people. I've suffered with depression and anxiety since I was 15 (I'm now 36) and it got ten times worse over Covid lockdown and has left me with a weird kind of intermittent agoraphobia. I also have insomnia like never before. I like awake all night, sometimes fighting off debilitating panic attacks, and spend the rest of the day like a zombie. I'm unable to work for the last two years because of it all and have tried everything from medications to counselling to weird fad diets... I've stopped drinking alcohol almost entirely (though never had a problem with it) and drink my 2l of water a day. But I'm having constant headaches and just want to sleep. I've taken to "sleeping" on the sofa in order to avoid disturbing my wife when I toss and turn all night. I have barely left the house in months and even the most mundane trips out drive terror into me. I don't even know what I'm asking... Has anyone suffered similar and what do you suggest if so? The sleep thing is the thing killing me lately. I am so zoned out 24/7, I sleep in hour-long bursts when my body and mind just give up. Sometimes it's at 11pm, sometimes 11am, etc. I can often go days without sleep followed by days in bed. Help. 1) what's your exercise like? creating full physical exhaustion at some point during the day makes it much easier to fall asleep 2) Try to create some sort of rigid schedule for yourself. Its hard to enforce that without the employer of damocles over your head but if you can give yourself an external commitment, even as simple as a regular online RPG or phonebank, that can make a big difference 3) https://forums.somethingawful.com/showthread.php?threadid=3997695 there's a lot of upsetting info about COVID in there but its much easier to manage anxiety when there's a devil you know instead of a devil you don't. If you don't know poo poo about COVID its a monster thats only limitation is you running out of theoretical anxiety, which is functionally limitless. Turns out is in fact pretty knowable even if there's a lot of known unkowns, and knowing what's in your control and what's not is TBH the only thing that made COVID anxiety manageable for me.
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Nov 27, 2022 21:26
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I was expecting a nice fat paycheck with overtime pay. Then it turned out I missed entering a day so my check was barely any different. Did all that work and sacrificed my time, just to totally gently caress it up at the very end. This is typically why I usually just do the minimum and hide the rest of the time, anything I do feels totally pointless and I'll be worse off for having tried at all. Whatever I do is just going to be unraveled at the last minute and the effort will have been for nothing. ETA: I like how it only took me about 30 minutes being back at work to discover a mistake I made and put me right back into stressed out "I hate myself and everything else and most especially myself" mode I was in last week. skooma512 has issued a correction as of 23:15 on Nov 28, 2022 |
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Nov 28, 2022 21:17
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skooma512 posted:I was expecting a nice fat paycheck with overtime pay. Then it turned out I missed entering a day so my check was barely any different. You know you still get paid for overtime even if you don't enter it right? They have to pay you. Talk to hr or manager and say you missed entering your time/need to submit a corrected time sheet
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Nov 28, 2022 23:50
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SSJ_naruto_2003 posted:You know you still get paid for overtime even if you don't enter it right? They have to pay you. Talk to hr or manager and say you missed entering your time/need to submit a corrected time sheet I've already filed a ticket with HR. It's still not as easy as doing it right the first time, and my sadbrains just latches on to it as "See? You really can't handle basic poo poo" And then there's also the possibility they just refuse to deal with it and then I have to get increasingly aggressive about someone else correcting a mistake I ultimately made.
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Nov 28, 2022 23:58
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skooma512 posted:I've already filed a ticket with HR. It's still not as easy as doing it right the first time, and my sadbrains just latches on to it as "See? You really can't handle basic poo poo" Yeah, it's no big deal though and people do it all the time.
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Nov 29, 2022 00:01
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Actually, nobody fucks up at work except skooma512.
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Nov 29, 2022 03:27
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It's a loving lovely feeling seeing literally everyone online convinced society will collapse in 5-10 years and have everyone IRL including my therapist call me a doomer for believing it will take 30. Sigh.
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Dec 1, 2022 11:22
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AceOfFlames posted:It's a loving lovely feeling seeing literally everyone online convinced society will collapse in 5-10 years and have everyone IRL including my therapist call me a doomer for believing it will take 30. Sigh. No one actually knows is the cool part. 30 years is far enough ahead that you should just live normally.
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Dec 1, 2022 13:59
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Societal collapse is happening right now. It's not some transformative apocalyptic event that happens in an instant, it's just social services gradually withering away to nothing, everything you need to live getting scarcer and more expensive, government increasingly focusing on policing / violent suppression and nothing else until eventually it can't even support that any more, etc. Barring the most incredibly pessimistic, like, "cascading collapse of the carbon cycle"-level nightmare scenarios for climate change, there's never going to be a point where your personal well-being or place in society suddenly don't matter or aren't worth planning for. Things are just going to continue to suck until people start building new social institutions to replace the ones that are dying and/or actively hostile to us. This isn't exactly a rosy outlook, but it does have implications that help me, personally, at least, stave off outright despair: there is always something to be done, and the worse societal conditions get, the more the mere act of survival becomes one of defiance. Your neighbors will need you; reforming society will inevitably go from an abstract theory to a pragmatic advantage to a material necessity. We all have a responsibility towards the system we live in but none of us are to blame for it in the sense of personal moral failing.
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Dec 1, 2022 16:23
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Tuxedo Catfish posted:Societal collapse is happening right now. It's not some transformative apocalyptic event that happens in an instant, it's just social services gradually withering away to nothing, everything you need to live getting scarcer and more expensive, government increasingly focusing on policing / violent suppression and nothing else until eventually it can't even support that any more, etc. I have never encounter this concept of a "community" I hear so much about. I have never lived anywhere where my neighbors talked to me. Every friend I ever made were people who wanted to know me and thought my discussion topics were interesting. I have also bounced between several different countries where I didn't know or spoke the language poorly looking for better job opportunities that can give me the means to build a better life like owning a house and not worrying about being too executively dysfunctional to cook or clean. Stuff is literally all that gives my life meaning. Stuff and learning things. I do not want to live an existence where I have to dig in the dirt for 12 hours a day and retreat to some "party" where I have to listen to people get drunk and talk about the weather. If all that makes me a terrible person fine but that means that most of the population of the freaking planet is also terrible. And the frustrating thing is that most people don't even REALIZE it. I'm someone who can't stand failure. I don't enjoy the process of building anything unless I know I will be successful. Why build a sandcastle if it will be washed away? Why make art if someone will just tell you it sucks? Why work towards making things better if they won't? Out of some sense of superiority? Screw that. I want things that last. I don't do anything if there is a high chance I will fail. I just don't know how to escape this. My brain is just too logical. As a result I just stare at the clock waiting as things get worse and worse. Tick tock. Tick tock. AceOfFlames has issued a correction as of 18:05 on Dec 1, 2022 |
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Dec 1, 2022 17:55
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You ever taken the raads-r? Your thoughts on life remind me of how I used to feel tbh
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Dec 1, 2022 18:57
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no, though my current therapist is giving me a bunch of questionnaires. ASD is definitely going to be checked, especially I have relatives who have it.
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Dec 1, 2022 19:00
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It's worth checking out tbh https://embrace-autism.com/raads-r/ Good luck with therapy. I always thought it was useless but ended up helping me a lot when I gave it a chance. SSJ_naruto_2003 has issued a correction as of 19:07 on Dec 1, 2022 |
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Dec 1, 2022 19:02
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SSJ_naruto_2003 posted:It's worth checking out tbh Hoo boy. I scored a 125. AceOfFlames has issued a correction as of 19:23 on Dec 1, 2022 |
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Dec 1, 2022 19:17
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That's like double needed for asd right?
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Dec 1, 2022 19:27
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thehandtruck posted:That's like double needed for asd right? It's kinda vague about it: quote:Meaning of RAADS–R scores I'm guessing this is meant to be combined with another test. I was once given one that had stuff like picking things out of a drawing filled with detail and determining the emotions of a person doing a ridiculous amount of mugging for the camera. That one said I was not autistic but it always felt off to me. AceOfFlames has issued a correction as of 19:34 on Dec 1, 2022 |
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Dec 1, 2022 19:32
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AceOfFlames posted:It's kinda vague about it: Yeah I'm not really an expert just someone who read about it in the last year or so after my wife's therapist asked her if I was autistic.
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Dec 1, 2022 20:08
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AceOfFlames posted:I have never encounter this concept of a "community" I hear so much about. I have never lived anywhere where my neighbors talked to me. Every friend I ever made were people who wanted to know me and thought my discussion topics were interesting. I have also bounced between several different countries where I didn't know or spoke the language poorly looking for better job opportunities that can give me the means to build a better life like owning a house and not worrying about being too executively dysfunctional to cook or clean. Stuff is literally all that gives my life meaning. Stuff and learning things. I do not want to live an existence where I have to dig in the dirt for 12 hours a day and retreat to some "party" where I have to listen to people get drunk and talk about the weather. If all that makes me a terrible person fine but that means that most of the population of the freaking planet is also terrible. And the frustrating thing is that most people don't even REALIZE it. SSJ_naruto_2003 posted:You ever taken the raads-r? Your thoughts on life remind me of how I used to feel tbh This is funny. I related to that post and irl I've been completely focused on whether or not I have ASD. It's driving me mad, because there are indications for, but also indications against. unwantedplatypus has issued a correction as of 04:00 on Dec 2, 2022 |
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Dec 2, 2022 03:56
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The eternal goon question, is this very intense social anxiety or very high functioning autism
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Dec 2, 2022 04:10
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StashAugustine posted:The eternal goon question, is this very intense social anxiety or very high functioning autism "yes" e: fwiw i score like a 190 on that test lol. i'm not good at making friends either but you can't always play to your strengths
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Dec 2, 2022 04:15
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| # ? May 26, 2024 00:49 |
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iirc I scored a 95 on the RAADS-R. I actually went through all the tests on the website and I always score in the "maybe" "high NT/low ND" range. But I'm also taking these now in my mid-20's. I know for a fact that I presented with more symptoms when I was younger but went through several "wow I should really figure out how to be less socially awkward" phases. I remember people telling me I used to speak in a monotone, for example. StashAugustine posted:The eternal goon question, is this very intense social anxiety or very high functioning autism Or is it trauma? unwantedplatypus has issued a correction as of 04:31 on Dec 2, 2022 |
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Dec 2, 2022 04:26
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