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That's a good skill tbh.
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Jan 16, 2023 17:36
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When I worked retail for a couple of years we had to take annual tests for regulatory compliance around selling people poo poo on finance. They used to just send 2 of us to a back office with a list of everyone’s logins to bang them out in a single afternoon.
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Jan 16, 2023 17:43
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I realized I was giving myself a heart attack over the production schedule and it's actually not that big of a deal because I'll be able to at least deliver on most of the major things management wants in the timeframe they want. Also, they tend to understand if there are delays/issues at least.
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Jan 16, 2023 17:47
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Escape From Noise posted:I realized I was giving myself a heart attack over the production schedule and it's actually not that big of a deal because I'll be able to at least deliver on most of the major things management wants in the timeframe they want. Also, they tend to understand if there are delays/issues at least. Same but I chilled out because we're already years and millions beyond BoE so if the customer really cared they would've done something by now.
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Jan 16, 2023 17:48
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BiggerBoat posted:I work in a poker room and part of my job is calculating bet payoffs, buy ins, cash outs and doing a fair amount of long math in my head. Which, like most people over the last 30 years, I have not done much of and used a phone/calculator like everyone else. But we're not allowed to have phones, calculators or even pen and paper to work these out. this sounds insane
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Jan 16, 2023 17:50
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History Comes Inside! posted:When I worked retail for a couple of years we had to take annual tests for regulatory compliance around selling people poo poo on finance. Wow. Back when I worked for a consultancy we had to do an ethics/aptitude type test to gain access to a few client mine sites (Huge iron ore companies. Very different from oil and gas in some ways.). We were told to be honest, the algorithms are really sophisticated, and they'll know you're lying. Okay, I can be honest. So I truthly answered questions like 'Sometimes I take things home from the office'. HR calls me up: "Outrail, you failed the test. Nobody fails the test. What the hell?' 'You told me to be honest and I steal stationary all the time, you know I have a whole drawer full of rulers and pens. Everyone steals poo poo from work.' (We had the only good and cool HR lady on the entire planet and everyone knew about my stationary fetish) 'Well you got the lowest score we've ever seen and it cost us $80. Go do it again and be 'honest' okay?' So I lied on every question and got the highest score in the company and that was it. I'm not sure what the moral is. Everything is stupid.
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Jan 16, 2023 17:54
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History Comes Inside! posted:When I worked retail for a couple of years we had to take annual tests for regulatory compliance around selling people poo poo on finance. Lol I absolutely catch that in my audits
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Jan 16, 2023 17:57
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Samuel L. Hacksaw posted:Same but I chilled out because we're already years and millions beyond BoE so if the customer really cared they would've done something by now. Yeah. It's stuff I could figure out on my own if I had full control over everything but they're doing a menu overhaul and stuff. There are a few other pieces to the puzzle but I at least mapped out some of it and should be able to figure out details with the boss tomorrow. Just tough with him busy with a bunch of other restaurants and stuff. Restaurant manager is now very convinced we need another milkshake IPA. The one we keep making barely sells but if we drop the tartness I'm sure it'll be a big hit! This guy and a few others in the company really suffer from the delusion that all we need to be successful is to make one beer that just blows up and not things like basic marketing and sales.
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Jan 16, 2023 18:16
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When I go to bars or breweries or whatever to drink, I always ask for 'a beer you would serve your grandpa', just one of those regular inoffensive plain beers that you can drink like 3-10 of in one sitting. Maybe people call them session beers? Like a drinking session? Anyway, if I were a restaurant manager with a brewery I'd want to make sure we have that kind of beer.
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Jan 16, 2023 18:55
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Capital Letdown posted:When I go to bars or breweries or whatever to drink, I always ask for 'a beer you would serve your grandpa', just one of those regular inoffensive plain beers that you can drink like 3-10 of in one sitting. Maybe people call them session beers? Like a drinking session? What if my grandfather was a raging alcoholic? [Server comes back with a half-gallon of popovs]
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Jan 16, 2023 18:58
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One of the hospitals I worked at hosed around and found out with scamming medicare, and part of the agreement to resume care of that demographic was for everyone, down to the loving housekeeping staff (who were largely Spanish-speaking only) to take some god awful 200 question ethics test every year (that never was revised). I figured out the answers to the whole thing, compiled an answer key, printed a couple copies and was the hero of my little department. I worked 1500 - 2300 so there wasn't admin around for most of my shift, so I'd help out the aforementioned SSO folks so they didn't get screwed over. Wound up leaving that job when most of my department got outsourced and I was left typing pathology, reviewing radiology voice recognized crap and with the 5 or so hours left of my shift, writing in my blog or filing charts in medical records.
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Jan 16, 2023 19:00
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Capital Letdown posted:When I go to bars or breweries or whatever to drink, I always ask for 'a beer you would serve your grandpa', just one of those regular inoffensive plain beers that you can drink like 3-10 of in one sitting. Maybe people call them session beers? Like a drinking session? Yeah. That's my thing. I don't think milkshake IPA is even popular anymore. I guess my experience has been if someone doesn't know beer but is interested they're going to be more likely to go with a pale ale, more standard IPA, lager, or a more traditional fruit beer (like a fruited Berliner or a blonde). I'll admit I can be kind of an old man, but I'm not the biggest fan of lactose beers in general. If they want to go the hype beer route they need to do a much better job of marketing. I'm planning on making a NEIPA soonish. I'm curious to see how well it sells though because it does seem like their popularity is waning recently. Edit: Fortunately, this guy has no say in the production schedule. It'd be nice to be able to kind of get an idea of what's selling and how well from him. Instead, I just get these weird brain farts. Escape From Noise fucked around with this message at 19:08 on Jan 16, 2023 |
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Jan 16, 2023 19:03
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Outrail posted:We had a bunch of site inductions on a website that wouldn't let you open multiple tabs, and you couldn't go back to review the slide deck information. Of course everyone takes a photo/screenshot of each slide. I think the real test was 'is this person smart enough to cheat'. I did this for an excel test that was part of an interview for an office position at a warehouse since I just really haven’t worked anywhere where they used excel for inventory or accounting purposes, but I am good at looking stuff up online quickly. The dude who interviewed me was very excited about my perfect score, but they wanted somebody with previous warehouse and logistics experience. I just can’t get myself to do tutorials and retain the information since I STILL haven’t had a job that uses excel for inventory, accounting, statistics related stuff. It just gets used as a reference database.
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Jan 16, 2023 19:14
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Are there any of those “tests” that are actually valid or worth a drat? I had to do one recently on sexual harassment, and the drat video was an hour long. So I muted it, and checked back every five minutes to see if I was supposed to answer a question. I spent the time reading this very thread. Due to not watching the video, I got all three questions wrong. It didn’t care, just played a short summary of the section and moved on. Certainly never heard from HR about it or anything. The thing is, I do think freedom from sexual harassment is very important. But if you want me to watch a badly acted video for an hour that covers stuff I already know, I have 20 more important things to spend the time on.
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Jan 16, 2023 19:31
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No. Years back I was teaching at a community college and pissed the admin off very much by pointing out that our annual “don’t sexually harass the students” training was bullshit. If they actually cared it would be a mandatory in-person seminar that covered things with more nuance and care than “don’t tell dirty jokes in class, students are not appropriate sexual partners even if they’re 18.” Like, I dunno, how to spot inappropriate behavior among your colleagues and how to handle it. That poo poo only existed so that if anyone turned out to be a creep they could hold up the power point and piss easy test in the lawsuit to prove that they made the perpetrator click a box pinky promising not to be a poo poo heel. It’s 100% CYA with a side of grounds for termination.
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Jan 16, 2023 20:03
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Capital Letdown posted:When I go to bars or breweries or whatever to drink, I always ask for 'a beer you would serve your grandpa', just one of those regular inoffensive plain beers that you can drink like 3-10 of in one sitting. Maybe people call them session beers? Like a drinking session? The "fancy" brewpub in the city I just moved from just carried Bud/Coors lite to keep that kind of people happy. I think they sold more of them when we hosted Easter there for both families than they had in the previous five years of operation combined. Every restaurant, bar and bowling alley where I am now carry the local Coors Banquet equivalent. Even the place that specializes in farm-to-table small plates and has a wine list 12 pages long.
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Jan 16, 2023 20:11
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Lazyfire posted:The "fancy" brewpub in the city I just moved from just carried Bud/Coors lite to keep that kind of people happy. I think they sold more of them when we hosted Easter there for both families than they had in the previous five years of operation combined. If we were just a restaurant with a craft beer selection, I'd get it. From a restaurant/pub perspective, it makes sense, but I do think serving a macro at the restaurant attached to the brewery is kind of bringing the competition to us and cuts into our own sales.
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Jan 16, 2023 20:15
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Escape From Noise posted:If we were just a restaurant with a craft beer selection, I'd get it. From a restaurant/pub perspective, it makes sense, but I do think serving a macro at the restaurant attached to the brewery is kind of bringing the competition to us and cuts into our own sales. I’m not a brewer but it can’t be THAT hard to make a basic, simple, miller analog. gently caress, just make a simple Kolsch. That’s more or less what American style lager was once upon a time. A brewery bar should do their own thing that makes them notable to beer connoisseurs, but they should also have something to give my father in law when he asks what they’ve got that’s like a Coors.
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Jan 16, 2023 20:19
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Cyrano4747 posted:I’m not a brewer but it can’t be THAT hard to make a basic, simple, miller analog. gently caress, just make a simple Kolsch. That’s more or less what American style lager was once upon a time. Yeah. That's the plan. It's why I originally made a Vienna lager, and now why I'm going to be making a German pils.
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Jan 16, 2023 20:20
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Then you have to fill all the gaps. If you (your bosses in this instance) are not interested in filling a fairly common niche, let someone else do it.
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Jan 16, 2023 20:21
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Things have been improving bit by bit but the company is big so changes can take a while. In the beginning it was too many cooks trying to engineer a success story by going viral on Instagram, but as time's gone on it seems like the idea of success through steady progress has started to dawn on them. I was also sort of resistant to doing lager at first because of our size and the amount of time required in brewing them vs ales, but because of our limited cold storage and kegs eventually realized it was something that could be done with planning.
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Jan 16, 2023 20:33
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Pyrtanis posted:One of the hospitals I worked at hosed around and found out with scamming medicare, and part of the agreement to resume care of that demographic was for everyone, down to the loving housekeeping staff (who were largely Spanish-speaking only) to take some god awful 200 question ethics test every year (that never was revised). "Admin got caught robbing the taxpayer! Quick! Hand them a golden parachute and saddle all the real laborers with extra busy work!"
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Jan 16, 2023 20:34
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Domus posted:Are there any of those “tests” that are actually valid or worth a drat? I had to do one recently on sexual harassment, and the drat video was an hour long. So I muted it, and checked back every five minutes to see if I was supposed to answer a question. I spent the time reading this very thread. Due to not watching the video, I got all three questions wrong. It didn’t care, just played a short summary of the section and moved on. Certainly never heard from HR about it or anything. The thing is, I do think freedom from sexual harassment is very important. But if you want me to watch a badly acted video for an hour that covers stuff I already know, I have 20 more important things to spend the time on. Yuck! Your company has one with actors? Or just corporate voice actors? We had interactive slideshows that had voice actors. Add long as whoever created them didn’t make you sit on the page any longer than necessary to read the closed captions or click for the various text blocks to finish, we could get through training modules pretty quickly. The annual cyber security training was kind of annoying because they make you do both versions periodically when one of them allows you to test out. At the time we started those, we had management that would not assign you time to train then get mad when you didn’t have enough downtime to finish them. So I do the first of the annual training, which allowed me to test out. Then two months later, my sup is mad at me because I didn’t finish the assigned cyber security training module and somehow the certification email was yoinked out of my outlook. And the one I’m getting bitched at about won’t let me test out and there is no downtime because of turnover. 3 years later, I was still being automatically assigned both modules, but that and the disappearing certification emails taught me to screenshot the cert so I can send confirmation that I already completed the loving “annual” training within the last 6 months so it’s okay to stop instant messaging me, while I’m in the middle of a call, demanding an immediate explanation as to why I have not completed my training. Yes, I did check that the module itself had not been updated since the previous time that I finished that title. Anyway, I’m attempting to apply for a couple of “urgent hiring” remote positions at the company I was just reduced from since they are sending emails to the next wave of reduced employees regarding the openings, but I’m currently locked out of the job board. Those jobs start 1/31. And they can’t police what you have around you on your desk in remote positions. One of the jobs is completely document based, so I probably won’t get nearly as bored unless I get through all of the documents. But at least that is a solid block of finding something else constructive to do instead of having anywhere from 5 minutes to 2 hours where I am not able to anything. To be clear, by constructive, I mean getting paid for being logged in, but doing stuff that doesn’t suck, like posting on these forums, reading a book, doing stupid paintings and drawings. Also, document processing means I can use the bathroom whenever I need to without having someone suggest I should request medical accommodation, which is an unpaid ,accommodation at this company. Oh, and I plan to talk to the government career assistance for poor people office this week regarding certifications,college, or any options in between. The unrelated subjects that were required, that I already knew I retained poorly, made me give up. I have a potty easy time learning and retaining most things now as long as I can actually talk to someone about it. But I’m middle aged now, so there are some careers that were possible when I was in my early 20’s that just aren’t possible now because the phd and md programs are very unlikely to accept someone my age. Bored fucked around with this message at 21:34 on Jan 16, 2023 |
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Jan 16, 2023 20:38
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I was going to say I never had to sit though a training video but then I remembered my brief stint working at a moving company. When it was over there wasn't a "test" per se, but the hiring manager or whatever asked me what I liked about it. Good thing I'm good at bullshitting I guess?
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Jan 16, 2023 20:43
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Escape From Noise posted:If we were just a restaurant with a craft beer selection, I'd get it. From a restaurant/pub perspective, it makes sense, but I do think serving a macro at the restaurant attached to the brewery is kind of bringing the competition to us and cuts into our own sales. Rainier?
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Jan 16, 2023 22:11
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Bored posted:L But I’m middle aged now, so there are some careers that were possible when I was in my early 20’s that just aren’t possible now because the phd and md programs are very unlikely to accept someone my age. This is field dependent so it isn’t going to be the same for everything, but I can say that it’s absolutely not true for all PhD programs. I’ve known more than one person who got a PhD in their 40s, and one who finished hers in her early 50s.
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Jan 16, 2023 22:54
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I finished my PhD shortly after I turned 41 and it's been very useful in my career since then. Please don't let age scare you off but do be 100% certain you want/need it because lol at your life for the next 3-7 years
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Jan 16, 2023 22:57
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TotalLossBrain posted:I finished my PhD shortly after I turned 41 and it's been very useful in my career since then. Please don't let age scare you off but do be 100% certain you want/need it because lol at your life for the next 3-7 years Yeah 100% this. There is a very good thread in SAL full of people happy to talk about grad school and help you figure out if it’s a good fit for you.
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Jan 16, 2023 23:05
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Pyrtanis posted:One of the hospitals I worked at hosed around and found out with scamming medicare, Sounds like they found out that they could to continue to gently caress around without real consequences. Domus posted:Are there any of those “tests” that are actually valid or worth a drat? I had to do one recently on sexual harassment, and the drat video was an hour long. So I muted it, and checked back every five minutes to see if I was supposed to answer a question. I spent the time reading this very thread. Due to not watching the video, I got all three questions wrong. It didn’t care, just played a short summary of the section and moved on. Certainly never heard from HR about it or anything. The thing is, I do think freedom from sexual harassment is very important. But if you want me to watch a badly acted video for an hour that covers stuff I already know, I have 20 more important things to spend the time on. Cyrano4747 posted:It’s 100% CYA with a side of grounds for termination. It's this. I worked for a high-stakes testing company that primarily served the pharma sales industry. The main idea was/is, after the big outrage about pharma sales people schmoozing doctors to prescribe whatever, including lying about what it actually does (or even treats!) there was an emphasis on ensuring that the sales people "knew" what they were selling. Several sales people apparently coasted free and clear because they successfully argued that they weren't actually aware of what the drugs did, and were pressured to lie and do whatever it took for the sales. So, the company I worked at provided software for high stakes testing, which would allow tests to be created by some designated users, and administered to other users whenever. The software was successfully upheld in court as valid in a particular case. So, now companies could provide these tests to "prove" that whoever took it actually knew the material, and thus anything they actually said wasn't the company's fault. The software was perfectly legit, it did what it was supposed to, but there's not much you can do to stop things at the management level if they're really determined to gently caress around. Our DBA at least made sure that the "anonymous" surveys within were actually as anonymous as he could make them at the data and storage levels, so those were also legit 
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Jan 16, 2023 23:13
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My union busting training was the first one I've had so far that did not have a test at the end. Just watch the video and that's it. At least they can't fire me for my answers.
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Jan 16, 2023 23:19
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Generally as long as it’s not a test that relates to something actually laid out with legislation/regulation so has a bunch of specific facts and figures you have to know, you can pass virtually any of these dumb training modules by just picking the answers that sound the least like the ones a total loving idiot would pick.
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Jan 16, 2023 23:26
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History Comes Inside! posted:Generally as long as it’s not a test that relates to something actually laid out with legislation/regulation so has a bunch of specific facts and figures you have to know, you can pass virtually any of these dumb training modules by just picking the answers that sound the least like the ones a total loving idiot would pick. We just got our annual safety refresher modules, you can put the videos on 2x speed and mute them, work on your actual job stuff on your other monitor, and yeah you'd have to be an idiot to fail the end of chapter tests for our in house ones. Multiple choice where it's 3 dumb/joke answers and one right one, 70% to pass. However, I've noticed they started using some external ones this year that have these interactive powerpoint-esque presentations that require 80% on the quizzes for passing, and the questions are specific enough with reasonable sounding answers it's p easy to fail them. If you fail, you can't just retake the quiz (and the quizes change in questions and such each time), you have to reclick through the whole module. You can however just google the questions if you get stuck though so it's easy enough to cheat.
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Jan 17, 2023 00:13
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History Comes Inside! posted:Generally as long as it’s not a test that relates to something actually laid out with legislation/regulation so has a bunch of specific facts and figures you have to know, you can pass virtually any of these dumb training modules by just picking the answers that sound the least like the ones a total loving idiot would pick. Our yearly training has questions and choices that are all the same format. Question: Somebody does a thing. Is this acceptable? A) Yeah, no big deal B) Yeah, no big deal, but still somehow a distinct NBD compared to Choice A. C) NO. This is in direct violoation of Article 47 of Stinky Whizzleteats Act of 1569 and is a violation of company policy. Somebody has opened themselves up to criminal prosecutions, and even worse has betrayed the shareholders. Suicide is too kind for this honorless dog. A pox on Somebody's house. D) Yeah, it's no big deal. I haven't actually read the actual training materials once. Just click the things that need clicked and get 100% on the first attempt of the quizzes. EDIT: also since a few weeks ago when they sent out a phishing exercise email from the security mailbox, I've been reporting all emails from that team as phishing.
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Jan 17, 2023 00:37
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Cthulu Carl posted:
We get these barracuda "watch this video about security thing" where the link to click has a 1000 character URL so that was my excuse to them why I don't watch them. The team got mad and told me (ccd my boss) that those were OK. So now I click every link in the fake phishing emails. And set up a filter from the team for their "stop clicking those links, you failed the test" as spam.
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Jan 17, 2023 00:51
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I just remembered that my first day at the job previous to the most recent, a bunch of the training modules wouldn’t show as completed even though I got to the page that told me I was done and could close my browser. I finally figured out that the CEO’s unnecessary speech at the start of all those modules was not completed, but the module was letting me go to the start of the actual learning. So I had to go to every single one of those modules, start the CEO video, grab the curser, then scrub to a second from the end. I’m pretty sure he was a big dummy and felt it was important he address all new employees on EVERY compliance video. He recently died, so there’s probably going to be new useless loving videos with a new dude, wearing orange foundation, giving a speech that does nothing but gently caress up the ability of the lowest paid employees to notify the system that they completed that module. Also, when I started, there were a few required courses that had broken slides. And also nice typos throughout because nobody who is given a position where they have to communicate clearly is capable of proofreading. Note: I’m sure I have typos in this very post, but I am not being paid to bore everyone with this post. I’m posting here as a favor. Bored fucked around with this message at 01:08 on Jan 17, 2023 |
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Jan 17, 2023 00:59
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For my first 10 years at my company the eLearning software wouldn't record complete if you pressed X instead of close
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Jan 17, 2023 01:28
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Cthulu Carl posted:Our yearly training has questions and choices that are all the same format. My favorite is the fact that they never change the training at all, so people are using like, Blackberries and getting in and out of 2006 Accords in my company's training videos. Thankfully, the answers don't change either and so you spend a lot of time clicking and "watching" stuff to answer softball questions without paying any attention to the training. Weirdly, this company has three training areas: one is for corporate and onboarding stuff, one is for policies and legal stuff and the final is for company ethics. Each has a different area and requires a new log in, none link directly to the training when you get emails, they just tell you to log into the system and type in the specified course. I've been late on performing "mandatory" training because of that more than once.
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Jan 17, 2023 02:13
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Domus posted:Are there any of those “tests” that are actually valid or worth a drat? I had to do one recently on sexual harassment, and the drat video was an hour long. So I muted it, and checked back every five minutes to see if I was supposed to answer a question. I spent the time reading this very thread. Due to not watching the video, I got all three questions wrong. It didn’t care, just played a short summary of the section and moved on. Certainly never heard from HR about it or anything. The thing is, I do think freedom from sexual harassment is very important. But if you want me to watch a badly acted video for an hour that covers stuff I already know, I have 20 more important things to spend the time on. It depends. My current job is as a corporate trainer. I teach classes on security design theory and on the software my company produces, but I talk trainers who get to do those kinds of compliance tests. And it breaks down like this. If management is afraid of the consequences then yes, the tests will be serious. If they are not afraid of the consequences then expect a joke. For non-compliance based stuff, it depends on if the certification provider sees the cert as a political fig leaf or if they feel it's an economic benefit. So if it's just there to tell customers it exists and to be shiny then it's a joke. Where I am at, we track a lot of metrics on people who do the cert. One of the metrics we see is that techs who get the cert generate less tech support calls. And when we look at the calls they make, they don't calls about easy simple stuff. Add in some other metrics and management approves of us making the testing serious. With the testing, we're aiming for CCNA minus subnetting as the level of difficulty. But to accommodate that, the classes are a bit more involved than just a video plus tiny quiz option. Which changes the cost a bit. For an in person class, my expense report is going to be between $2400 to $2900 depending on the location. Costs for me as an employee are about ~$3000 a week. The lab environments run about $100 per class, with another $50 or so in other labor bits. So call the costs per class ~$6000. We charge $1595 per seat with a 16 seat cap. We tend to average closer to 8 students per class. Compare that to the average sexual harassment training video plus quiz option. Those generally cost $15 to $30 per seat. For the basic OSHA version, your costs will be more like $50 to $75 but that's more about less seats being sold. So yeah, there is more than a little getting what you paid for out of it.
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Jan 17, 2023 02:21
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We have a custom training at my program and the answers to most questions are the answer that is closest to "that sounds like a crime. I would definitely not bribe that guy and instead call this guy in our company who handles that who I will never investigate what they do or how they do their work."
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Jan 17, 2023 02:22
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Why isn't 'its okay if I don't get caught' an acceptable answer? Coz it clearly is
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Jan 17, 2023 03:59
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