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theHUNGERian posted:When my laptop upgrade was low on ram I pulled out the company credit card and bought as much as the laptop could handle. When it was too slow and IT told me I was not due for an upgrade, I told them my hard drive was making occasional clicking noises, and got an upgrade within a week. "Wait, this laptop has an SSD." "Too late, suckers!"
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Jan 23, 2023 04:09
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I got given a laptop with a broken G key and they helpfully asked, maybe just dont use that letter?
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Jan 23, 2023 04:41
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Barudak posted:I got given a laptop with a broken G key and they helpfully asked, maybe just dont use that letter? lmao
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Jan 23, 2023 04:54
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This is gonna make my job at Old Man very awkward
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Jan 23, 2023 05:04
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dpkg chopra posted:This is gonna make my job at Old Man very awkward lol
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Jan 23, 2023 07:18
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in a well actually posted:bottom tier hp/dell/lenovo laptops are a sign the it manager reports to the cfo Nah, it's a sign that IT is weak. I'm an IT Director that reports to the CFO, and I send out latitude 5530s with an i5 and 16GB for regular people, precision 7750s with i7s and 32GB for power users, and Ruggeds for field guys. If the finance people ask about capex, I look them in the eye and ask if we're going to tell employees that we don't have the budget to let them make money for us. You just have to not blink first. Edit - also pro support plus with next business day onsite. Don't ship your poo poo back to me for a replacement, Dell is going to send a weirdo contractor to you whereever you are and he'll have your poo poo fixed in half an hour.
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Jan 23, 2023 07:32
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in a well actually posted:bottom tier hp/dell/lenovo laptops are a sign the it manager reports to the cfo Truer words never spoken. $Job-2$ I reported to a CFO-like boss (member of the owning family, heavily involved in business and management) that doubled as CIO, and we were regularly asked if we could repair 10-year-old laptops. It didn't matter if you were a new hire or an old hand, IC or management; if we had a junker lying around, that was your next laptop. They were consistent, though: they ran every department like that. I'm talking about a €1.2 billion turnover company, privately held.
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Jan 23, 2023 08:48
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FrozenVent posted:I think I got a second hand laptop. use this machine solely for polishing your resume
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Jan 23, 2023 09:08
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We have a two tier laptop system where "developer spec" is silver and everyone else gets blue. As you can imagine this gives us higher status silver laptop owners endless "well, I guess a blue one is ok if you're not doing any real work." jokes.
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Jan 23, 2023 09:49
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Some high status people at my place occasionally manage to negotiate Macbooks, which are fine laptops, but unfortunately don't work with the document authoring software / template. This means they corrupt every document they open outside the Word web app, which they accidentally do on a frequent basis. Lol! All work gone
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Jan 23, 2023 11:06
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champagne posting posted:use this machine solely for polishing your resume It’s a large organization and I mostly use it for emails and writing poo poo. It’s fine.
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Jan 23, 2023 12:31
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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6KefznccsY0 Only slightly exaggerated requirements for today's computer touchers.
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Jan 23, 2023 14:47
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Democratic Pirate posted:I held off replacing my laptop for 2 years beyond the scheduled replace date because mine works and I’ve heard horror stories about the new ones.
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Jan 23, 2023 16:06
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My laptop has a quadro video card and they can pry it from my cold dead fingers if they try to upgrade me to one with integrated graphics and no numpad.
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Jan 23, 2023 16:38
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We switched to Dells so I am nursing my X1 as long as possible. It just turned three, which is about the normal lifespan for my laptops before an unhealthy lifestyle catches up to them 
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Jan 23, 2023 18:03
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I had a T410 thinkpad for like 6 years at my last job, thankfully it survived the period where hp was the supplier so I didn’t have to get one of those. They were giving the engineers massive 15” ones that weighed a ton and pieces kept falling off of. By the time my thinkpad was too slow to be usable they had moved back to dells and I got a really nice latitude for the 6 months before I quit. At the new place I got a slightly less nice latitude, sigh. Some of the applications guys manage to finangle macbook pros and I have no idea how they manage that (although would probably be more of a hassle than it’s worth really)
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Jan 23, 2023 19:10
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Mid-December (I forget exact date, probably around Dec 14-15): My laptop stops connecting to the internet. Wifi is completely out, Device Manager shows a problem starting the device, driver resets / updates / etc won't work, and the Event Viewer wasn't particularly helpful. I call IT, they tell me to bring it to Building X helpdesk. Date +1: I go to the helpdesk. They poke it for a bit and decide they need to refresh the BIOS. I can already tell that's the wrong answer, but they're the IT guys, let them do their thing. After bios flash, the PC will not post. They decide it's actually broken, and send me to Building Y for more help. Date +2: I go to Building Y and give them the laptop, describe what happened because somehow, you always have to reiterate ticket details every time you do anything here. Nobody reads the last ticket, or maybe they assume whoever entered it got it wrong. Either way. The person receiving my laptop calls Building X helpdesk "useless hacks" and takes the laptop. Date +3: E-mail comes from Building Y. They fixed the BIOS and got it to boot. The wifi card had died, physically, and that's the problem. They don't have a spare in the building and have to order it from stock. It'll take a few days, but it's the end of the year so no guarantees on it getting in before the winter closure (24th to 1st). They tell me to come back and get a loaner. Date +4: I pick up the loaner. It doesn't work remotely. Not only does it not work remotely, it doesn't even work remotely for the admins logging into the system via remote connect to try to fix it. They refer me back to Building Y again. Date +5: Building Y asks me why they were trying to push a Mac-based access patch to my Windows HP device. I tell them that they never mentioned that part to me, and indicate that they were controlling the PC remotely and should've clearly seen that it was a Windows PC. Building Y uses slightly stronger language than "uselses hacks" this time and updates some access requirements so that our remote access software will ID the laptop and let it in. Date +6 until whenever winter closure came around: No wifi card in yet. Loaner continues. During the site closure, the loaner period ends and the laptop's access is deactivated. I figure this out on January 3rd when I can't get online again. We repeat all the Day+5 fixes, but at least this time I don't have to walk to Building Y. Jan 6th: My wifi card is received and installed. Laptop is ready to go. I tell them I'll pick it up Monday. Jan 9th-13th: I end up not going into the office because of a potential covid-exposure. I didn't catch it, but didn't want to expose anyone else. Plus, my boss tells me to WFH for the week because we're expected to have torrential rains, flooding and winds. The bus service is interrupted, the trains stop running for a bit, etc etc. This week is literally a wash. Jan 16th: I receive notification that Building Y didn't want to hold the laptop and FedEx'd it to my condo. Signature required for pickup, plus second form of ID. It'll be there the 17th. I continue to use a loaner. Jan 17th, morning: I am at the door, sitting there, waiting for FedEx. I watch the guy out the window run up and slap a "nobody answered" sticker on the door and then run back to the truck. I shout after him and he drives off. gently caress FEDEX. The e-mail I receive an hour later tells me I can pick it up after 6PM in [Forty minute drive away] Jan 17th, around 7PM: I arrive at the holding spot, and am informed I cannot pickup the package. I show them the e-mail, and they inform me that the e-mail means more that I definitely can't pick it up before 6PM, not that it's going to be available after 6PM. It's still on the truck and probably won't be unloaded today. Come back tomorrow and try again. Again, gently caress FEDEX. January 17th, once I drive home: Redirect package to be held at a Walgreens in my town. There's a FedEx dropoff there. They inform me that this will void next-day shipping. I laugh. January 19th: Finally pick up my laptop. Thank loving God. That's my IT story. Thanks to (let's call him C) in Building Y for being good at his job, and gently caress literally everyone else who touched my goddamned laptop, including myself.
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Jan 23, 2023 19:22
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Sundae posted:I am at the door, sitting there, waiting for FedEx. I watch the guy out the window run up and slap a "nobody answered" sticker on the door and then run back to the truck. I shout after him and he drives off. I have watched this same thing happen on multiple occasions in multiple different places, almost always FedEx. There has to be some perverse incentive going on here. My guess is that it takes too long to get a signature so it's better for their metrics/they get home faster just scumbagging attempted delivery notices. I'm not sure the end game though......
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Jan 23, 2023 19:32
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Motronic posted:I have watched this same thing happen on multiple occasions in multiple different places, almost always FedEx. There has to be some perverse incentive going on here. My guess is that it takes too long to get a signature so it's better for their metrics/they get home faster just scumbagging attempted delivery notices. I'm not sure the end game though...... I'm guessing the drivers are on some insane metrics they have to meet, so if they get too far behind, they just stop delivering. On the other hand, a FedEx driver in Alabama dumped at least six truckloads of packages down a ravine and FedEx didn't do anything until the police got involved, so maybe they just don't give a poo poo.  (https://www.washingtonpost.com/nation/2021/12/01/fedex-driver-dumped-packages-ravine-alabama/)quote:Hill, the FedEx spokesman, said the company appreciates its customers as they go through the package recovery process. ...but they don't appreciate them enough to do the seriously easy footwork it'd have taken to ID the problem after the first truckload of missing packages. Unless FedEx is insanely behind the times, they know what truck every single package is on, and who is driving that truck. There were at least 450 individual impacted customers per that article, so either this guy had a shitload of failed / delayed deliveries on his record or an insane number of missing package reports from customers all associated with his deliveries. Anyone paying attention could see that signal from space. Sundae fucked around with this message at 19:40 on Jan 23, 2023 |
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Jan 23, 2023 19:37
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Sundae posted:I'm guessing the drivers are on some insane metrics they have to meet, so if they get too far behind, they just stop delivering. This is correct. If you don't keep up with the pace The Almighty Computer assigns to you, while working under the handicap of being forced to follow the insane, circuitous, and redundant routes The Almighty Computer dictates you follow, you have to work late and you get written up. As a corporate strategy, FedEx appears to not at all mind making the customer come to the depot to pick up their package. Their drivers are also notorious for driving like meth-addled maniacs, much more so than UPS or even branded Amazon trucks/vans. I suspect the only reason FedEx still exists is UPS can't keep up with the demand. Eric the Mauve fucked around with this message at 20:14 on Jan 23, 2023 |
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Jan 23, 2023 20:07
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I find there to be a large service difference between FedEx Ground, which is subcontracted out, and anything that gets send by air and delivered by an actual FedEx employee.
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Jan 23, 2023 20:20
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Sundae posted:That's my IT story. Thanks to (let's call him C) in Building Y for being good at his job, and gently caress literally everyone else who touched my goddamned laptop, including myself. That's sub-par for that group. Pass me a ticket number or two and I can poke at it. The actual repair folks are understaffed and horribly overworked, so no surprise they just dumped a loaner on you. Motronic posted:I have watched this same thing happen on multiple occasions in multiple different places, almost always FedEx. There has to be some perverse incentive going on here. My guess is that it takes too long to get a signature so it's better for their metrics/they get home faster just scumbagging attempted delivery notices. I'm not sure the end game though...... It's all of them. UPS has just not delivered some times, sometimes with the package being available for pickup.
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Jan 23, 2023 20:36
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mllaneza posted:That's sub-par for that group. Pass me a ticket number or two and I can poke at it. The actual repair folks are understaffed and horribly overworked, so no surprise they just dumped a loaner on you. I’ve declined to go pick up the package once when this happened, as a matter of principle, and argued to the merchant that I paid for home delivery. Of course the customer rep’s simplest option was to refund me and accept back the package. I’m not FedEx’s customer in this case so I can’t really complain to them. I guess the next way to escalate would be to complain to the FTC that merchants are advertising and selling home delivery, but what’s actually offered is a warehouse pickup? (Yes, that would be quixotic)
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Jan 23, 2023 22:03
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mllaneza posted:That's sub-par for that group. Pass me a ticket number or two and I can poke at it. The actual repair folks are understaffed and horribly overworked, so no surprise they just dumped a loaner on you. Will do. To add more fun, now my system audio doesn't work instead! 
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Jan 23, 2023 22:58
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Sundae posted:Will do. To add more fun, now my system audio doesn't work instead! Congrats on your new Linux machine.
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Jan 23, 2023 23:02
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Day 1 of new employment. I have had my onboarding meeting. I have watched my mandatory training videos. The two learning paths were actually the same topics covered by two different people who said exactly the same thing. Three hours to go.
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Jan 23, 2023 23:04
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dpkg chopra posted:Day 1 of new employment. I have had my onboarding meeting. I have watched my mandatory training videos. The two learning paths were actually the same topics covered by two different people who said exactly the same thing. I misread this as "I have had my waterboarding meeting. I have watched my mandatory training videos." The misread doesn't result in a meaningful distinction.
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Jan 23, 2023 23:10
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dpkg chopra posted:Day 1 of new employment. I have had my onboarding meeting. I have watched my mandatory training videos. The two learning paths were actually the same topics covered by two different people who said exactly the same thing. A couple years ago I had someone start remotely on Dec 23rd. He was desperate to get a job and I wanted to fill my req ASAP as I had some concerns it might get ganked and I needed the spot filled. I onboarded him the day before we all basically logged off for 2 weeks by sending him a bunch of videos and then told him to post in slack once a day so I could prove he came in and then go watch cartoons or play video games all day and his training would start when we get back. Was kind of a win for everyone.
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Jan 23, 2023 23:11
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Sleep last night: 5 hours Meetings today: 6 hours Time to bust out the Homer glasses
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Jan 24, 2023 00:09
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Jumpsuit posted:Sleep last night: 5 hours Oh hey me. But add in a surprise 3 hour teams meeting to deal with a production issue.
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Jan 24, 2023 00:20
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Sundae posted:Jan 17th, morning: I am at the door, sitting there, waiting for FedEx. I watch the guy out the window run up and slap a "nobody answered" sticker on the door and then run back to the truck. I shout after him and he drives off. gently caress FEDEX. The e-mail I receive an hour later tells me I can pick it up after 6PM in [Forty minute drive away] Every time I order a new cell phone this is what happens.
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Jan 24, 2023 01:44
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Manager: Roumba, please rewrite your self-evaluation, again. They changed the format, again. Also, I want you to get a raise, so make it more [paraphrased: self-suck-off-y]. No problemo, pal. That's a writing prompt that even I can work with.
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Jan 24, 2023 15:58
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Jan 24, 2023 16:03
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How have you aligned yourself with company ideals? Please ensure the response is self-suck-off-y.quote:I understand that you may want me to express the statement in a more self-promoting manner, but as a language model AI I do not have the ability to express any feeling or opinion, but I can rephrase it for you: I wonder if anyone would notice if I left the initial paragraph in there.
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Jan 24, 2023 16:53
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Guy Axlerod posted:How have you aligned yourself with company ideals? Please ensure the response is self-suck-off-y. Does anybody else have difficulty actually focusing on any of the words in that paragraph? Like my eyes start to glaze over no matter how hard I try. I feel like I've trained myself over years of advertisements / corporate fluff to completely skip certain combinations of words.
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Jan 24, 2023 16:56
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The initial reply used bullets and was easier to read. The format would probably be lost if I pasted it into my form.
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Jan 24, 2023 17:15
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We've had an "additional rating" added this year that has to be set for everyone by their manager, it's a five point scale and it has been made abundantly clear that the expectation is that everyone is rated in the middle because "anything lower means you've done something instantly sackable anyway, and anything higher is impossible to actually do, so just set the middle and nobody will hassle you about it".
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Jan 24, 2023 18:34
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Powerful Two-Hander posted:We've had an "additional rating" added this year that has to be set for everyone by their manager, it's a five point scale and it has been made abundantly clear that the expectation is that everyone is rated in the middle because "anything lower means you've done something instantly sackable anyway, and anything higher is impossible to actually do, so just set the middle and nobody will hassle you about it". It’d be especially funny if you can only give round number ratings.
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Jan 24, 2023 18:37
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priznat posted:It’d be especially funny if you can only give round number ratings. Turns out it's actually A to E so everyone gets a C!
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Jan 24, 2023 18:44
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I went on pto a few weeks ago, which was cut short by my friend’s husband having a heart attack and dying a few days later. He was a very close family friend. There was a huge fuckup on a project I was managing, which is ultimately my fault and I’m not really sure how to handle that I hosed up so badly. I let my boss know asap the entire situation and she was I pretty understanding, but this is really eating me up inside. So I guess I am asking for advice on how to move forward? And partially posting the vent.
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Jan 24, 2023 18:55
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