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slurm posted:Definitely not going to eat or drink anything they give me But you've hardly touched your ice cold mountain stream water. That giardia isn't gonna drink itself, boyo.
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Feb 9, 2023 21:54
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A customer is complaining that our telematics system is not updating any data. We have decided to get to the bottom of this by combing through telematics data.
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Feb 9, 2023 21:55
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Machai posted:Are you the dumb poo poo your work does? I think so  Methylethylaldehyde posted:But you've hardly touched your ice cold mountain stream water. That giardia isn't gonna drink itself, boyo. How do you know how Giardia behaves? Are you the president of water born illnesses? Maybe they do drink themselves prior to causing severe colitis. Bored fucked around with this message at 22:33 on Feb 9, 2023 |
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Feb 9, 2023 22:31
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slurm posted:On the nature of the hose, I once had a job where a generator had been assembled incorrectly and the injectors were seized into the heads. The heads had to be removed from the generator and the injectors beaten out with a large sledge and a steel drift. Unfortunately we only had one hydraulic jack to remove the head nuts, and as we were putting the first of nine heads back on it gave up the ghost. For the next month, 7 days a week, from 1730-2330 on top of our normal workday we had to work to make hydraulic jack rebuild kits from things lying around. There were 3 of us and we continued at our futile task diligently and once or twice even got a nut torqued down. Everyone spent many hours trying to splice o-rings and hand cut backing rings from various sheet materials. At the end of the month we'd spent $35,000 in overtime and incurred significant trouble with two different regulators over working hours violations. When the jack rebuild kits finally came in the generator was back together in an hour with the proper 4 jacks at a time going down the line. I think we work for the same place, at least in spirit.
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Feb 9, 2023 22:32
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Bored posted:I think so I'll have you know that I am the Senior Executive Vice Chaplain of all Prayers Uttered While making GBS threads Yourself Half to Death. Most of my work is helping people through moderate to severe examples of Bidirectional Gastrointestinal Distress regardless of source. You've never seen someone speedrun the seven stages of grief in one afternoon until you've seen a hiker in the woods with Giardia run out of toilet paper.
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Feb 9, 2023 22:52
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Super Waffle posted:Had an interview yesterday and absolutely killed it. This job is a 10 minute commute, has way more interesting and high-profile work, and would be a $30k raise. Lets hope things pan out, I cannot wait to hand in my notice. Congrats! Do you live in a Waffle House-themed house or is that more a headquarters/lair?
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Feb 9, 2023 23:08
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goatface posted:Tech dudes love starting a hobby brewery. Tech dudes and engineers seem to be always convinced they can do anything without experience by applying first principles and logic and researching hard enough. I know this is how they think because I've got self-diagnosed engineer brain and constantly get myself into trouble that starts with, 'Oh come on, it can't be that hard I'm sure there's a youtube video'.
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Feb 9, 2023 23:12
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Outrail posted:Tech dudes and engineers seem to be always convinced they can do anything without experience by applying first principles and logic and researching hard enough. The brewery bug hits people of all walks of life. It's a curious thing. I know of one local brewery co-started by an ex military guy who came back and decided that was his dream, even though he didn't brew or share brews before starting it.
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Feb 9, 2023 23:33
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Outrail posted:Tech dudes and engineers seem to be always convinced they can do anything without experience by applying first principles and logic and researching hard enough. Oh no! I have latent engineer brain! Tbf, it’s generally artsy stuff I apply it to and I expect to fail the first multiple times. Bored fucked around with this message at 23:40 on Feb 9, 2023 |
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Feb 9, 2023 23:33
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Lol, my fortune 500 company is no longer paying custodians to pick up trash. I ain't fuckin' doin it.
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Feb 10, 2023 00:29
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Samuel L. Hacksaw posted:Lol, my fortune 500 company is no longer paying custodians to pick up trash. Update that resume, this happened at a hospital I worked at and two weeks later we heard we'd gotten bought. Our new overlords tried to implement a one minute late = no call no show with no clocking in early allowed. My dept was outsourced shortly thereafter for "cost cutting".
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Feb 10, 2023 00:39
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JnnyThndrs posted:I think we work for the same place, at least in spirit. It was a rough month but at least I got a story, and thinking about it, 12 grand
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Feb 10, 2023 00:41
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Outrail posted:Congrats! Super Waffle is actually interviewing to be the new Waffle House Index
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Feb 10, 2023 01:15
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Samuel L. Hacksaw posted:Lol, my fortune 500 company is no longer paying custodians to pick up trash. "My" fortune 500 company quietly stopped cleaning the bathrooms 2x/day (a "covid precaution") a few months ago. I stand in pee now everyday. It's cool. Their stock price and revenue just won't stop climbing.
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Feb 10, 2023 01:23
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Samuel L. Hacksaw posted:Lol, my fortune 500 company is no longer paying custodians to pick up trash. Wtf, is that legal? 
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Feb 10, 2023 01:43
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YeahTubaMike posted:Wtf, is that legal? Yeah, it's also not in my job description to take out the trash so when the bag gets full, I'm gonna leave it in the executive wing. Gonna scope out the camera situation Monday.
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Feb 10, 2023 03:07
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Had to complete the conflicts of interest training today. The section on office relationships, every single relationship that needed to be reported was gay. Hrmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm
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Feb 10, 2023 03:39
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Barudak posted:Had to complete the conflicts of interest training today. The section on office relationships, every single relationship that needed to be reported was gay. My workplace trainings seem to skip over the fact gay people exist at all, pick your corporate poison.
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Feb 10, 2023 03:46
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satanic splash-back posted:My workplace trainings seem to skip over the fact gay people exist at all, pick your corporate poison. True Ours is america-culturally tinged sometimes subtly because of things like while they put in a healthy mix of people of all ethnicities and orientations in it, all the names especially for black people, are noticeably american. Its also American cultured because there is a pause break to ask your nationality and if you put in America you get bonus content. Yay!! For the record, we have no offices in the US
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Feb 10, 2023 04:02
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Someone sent this email to my company's entire office staff in the corporate building... like 300+ people: I am still trying to figure out what the hell those first two lines mean. One hell of a long winded and cordial email for something that could be stated in like 2 sentences without screwing up the grammar a few times. Is he complaining about not being able to work remotely or something? Corporate office workers are so weird, man.
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Feb 10, 2023 04:49
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Very strong M'Glasses! energy
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Feb 10, 2023 05:02
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We've been trying to unfuck out process for imaging computers for a while - when asset management first tried to get us to start handling the imaging, getting one computer done took like 4 hours. And also had a failure rate of like 50% because no one wanted to fix it. Today it seemed like a fistfight was going to break out between two of the guys on my team completely burned out on this problem that shouldn't even be our problem because one dude could not get it into his head that we finally had the means to install office offline. Just fifteen minutes of one dude accurately describing the situation - the newest image has ALL the files needed and everything sets up automatically and offline - and the other dude say "I understand, BUT Office can't be installed offline" endlessly, with increasingly raised voices until one gave up and ate a Snickers. All because none of the people on other teams that should be responsible for this want to figure out how to unfuck our network. On the bright side, the process now takes about a half hour and only rarely fails. At least until the security teams figure out all the unauthorized, unapproved applications we've installed and the unmanaged router that got hooked up in the server closet so we can actually get updated images in less than a week (previously the only dude able to get it had to download it on a loving mifi because he lives in the middle of nowhere, then physically come to the office with it on new USB drives or some poo poo).
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Feb 10, 2023 05:16
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We ran out of pale ale really fast. I wish I could make more like right now, but it looks like that'll have to wait until next month. Weirdly, it seems like the bière de Noël (hon hon hon!) is pretty popular. The bartender told me a lot of customers order seconds. So that's nice. We have such an odd customer base. The tropical IPA took a long time to sell (may not have been my best) but we sold half of the Belgian dark strong in about a month. Also, the weird French beer is selling well, and the best part was we didn't pay for any of the ingredients for it!
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Feb 10, 2023 05:19
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Toxic Mental posted:Is he complaining about not being able to work remotely or something? Basically what it looks like, yeah. Passive-aggressively throwing shade on the idea of coming into the office by noting that he lost his glasses there, what a drat shame, wouldn't have been an issue if he'd been working from home.
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Feb 10, 2023 05:26
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Toxic Mental posted:Someone sent this email to my company's entire office staff in the corporate building... like 300+ people: guy writes like an NPC in an email you find on a computer in deus ex
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Feb 10, 2023 05:59
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ben shapino posted:guy writes like an NPC in an email you find on a computer in deus ex We have one of those 
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Feb 10, 2023 06:18
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Please advise
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Feb 10, 2023 06:26
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Outrail posted:Tech dudes and engineers seem to be always convinced they can do anything without experience by applying first principles and logic and researching hard enough. I mean, this is a true statement. But "researching hard enough" means at least half a decade, better make it a full one, studying and researching the topic full time, preferably with access to a wide selection of teachers to explain poo poo and ask questions. Not five weeks at Google University and three hours (cumulative) thinking about the problem hard on the toilet. Oh wait no that half a decade absolutely counts as experience nevermind I guess it is a dumb statement even in principle, not only in application.
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Feb 10, 2023 07:40
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TotalLossBrain posted:Please advise I've only ever used that on one boss. Why? https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=l9dmoT9AfoI When we first met, his recap of his career ended in 1993 in Pretoria and picked up again in London in 1994. 
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Feb 10, 2023 08:04
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Ah poo poo. I must have bumped the blow off valve just slightly and killed the carb I got from spunding the bière de Mars!
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Feb 10, 2023 08:14
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Escape From Noise posted:Ah poo poo. I must have bumped the blow off valve just slightly and killed the carb I got from spunding the bière de Mars! Do you have a way to pin it on the chef?
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Feb 10, 2023 11:07
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I imagine that Brewery/Restaurant will one day just burn down to hide the corpses that happened.
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Feb 10, 2023 11:56
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Ichabod Sexbeast posted:Do you have a way to pin it on the chef? It's not the biggest deal. I'll just have to carb it from a canister and the carb won't be as nice and delicate. (Hon! Hon! Hon!).
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Feb 10, 2023 12:28
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i have to do a lot of corporate training but i couldnt tell you if any of them have offensive/problematic content or not. 2x, mute, background the window (or move out of view if it detects backgrounding), randomly quick through any quizzes til it passes, repeat until finished
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Feb 10, 2023 12:45
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thathonkey posted:i have to do a lot of corporate training but i couldnt tell you if any of them have offensive/problematic content or not. There is some other way to do corporate BS training that has no penalty for failing the quiz? My personal pet peeve on these is when they include the “check all that apply”, especially when they include program numbers.
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Feb 10, 2023 15:09
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Orvin posted:There is some other way to do corporate BS training that has no penalty for failing the quiz? Sometimes if you click tab it will cycle through interactive images on the slide and you might find a way to skip ahead. Quiz answers are usually “all of the above” or the one with the most text. If letting it run in the background, don’t leave it open too long or it might time out and lose your progress (depends on the program.)
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Feb 10, 2023 15:41
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Orvin posted:There is some other way to do corporate BS training that has no penalty for failing the quiz? there was no penalty for failing the mandatory yearly cGDP/cGMP tests at the drug factory, except that your supes saw how many times you had to take it, and that would absolutely directly factor into your eventual termination just watching people take the cGDP quiz to get >80% like 7-8 times as their lead, gritting my teeth and thinking, "THIS IS LITERALLY WHAT YOU DO ALL NIGHT AND WHY MY LIFE IS A loving NIGHTMARE"
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Feb 10, 2023 15:50
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One of the people replacing me on my old team is a 30 something with a bunch of customer facing experience from a number of other companies and from the most part he and I did a lot of training on calls so I didn't see much of his written communication. He CC'd me on an email to one of our vendors today with the words: "Pls let me knw when we can have expect respon. date." Just absolutely no way. Most of our communication is email based due to how many attachments and images we need to send back and forth and in the limited exchanges we had over IM and email there wasn't anything this egregious. This is bad, but also not really my problem because I don't work for the team. The problem has been him constantly calling most of this week to ask me to perform actions for him. I get that he's new to the company and that he doesn't have access to some things yet, but I've explained to him multiple times that I no longer work for that team, so I'm not going to send out requests for quote, I'm not going to change dates on orders, I'm not going to issue new orders, etc. I'm getting at least a couple IMs a day asking to do his job for him and have asked my former boss to reign him in on this, there are people on the team who are supposed to help him out on these things. Hasn't slowed him down at all.
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Feb 10, 2023 16:04
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Omobono posted:I mean, this is a true statement. But "researching hard enough" means at least half a decade, better make it a full one, studying and researching the topic full time, preferably with access to a wide selection of teachers to explain poo poo and ask questions. Not five weeks at Google University and three hours (cumulative) thinking about the problem hard on the toilet. You're being pedantic. Obviously I'm not talking about people who dedicate half a decade to master something. I'm talking about idiot techbros who think they can master anything by reading a bunch of Reddit and Wikipedia articles and just going for it. E: not just techbros, lots of people are idiots. Outrail fucked around with this message at 17:46 on Feb 10, 2023 |
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Feb 10, 2023 17:23
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Lazyfire posted:One of the people replacing me on my old team is a 30 something with a bunch of customer facing experience from a number of other companies and from the most part he and I did a lot of training on calls so I didn't see much of his written communication. He CC'd me on an email to one of our vendors today with the words: "Pls let me knw when we can have expect respon. date." Are you actually responding to the IMs or just ignoring them? Because if you're answering, you should stop. Not even an "I don't work on that team, you'll have to ask someone else". Just... Nothing.
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Feb 10, 2023 17:28
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