PYF Thing You Just Realized: Everyday someone on Earth takes the world's biggest shit

The Something Awful Forums > Main > Post Your Favorite: Carefully Curated > PYF Thing You Just Realized: Everyday someone on Earth takes the world's biggest shit

«‹›484 »

Manager Hoyden: Mar 5, 2020

run on sentience posted:

Just wash your hair, and rear end too, since apparently that's not common sense. You are not the one person on the planet whose sweat, oil, and buildup of bacteria and dead skin cells doesn't stink. You are not the one person whose body doesn't produce this buildup and thus doesn't require a chemical to remove it.

Also dry shampoo doesn't clean your hair, it's meant as a very temporary means of soaking up excess oil and just adds to the buildup if you don't wash it. Can also lead to scalp infections. Often looks like clumpy dandruff after a few hours.

Well I mean okay that's a fine opinion but it's not some commune-with-nature alternative lifestyle suggestion to not shampoo your hair every time you bathe. It's like the number one thing professionals will tell you if you're trying to take better care of your hair. Ask your hairdresser and then tell them to wash their rear end as you walk out in disgust when you hear their answer

# ? Feb 13, 2023 21:07

Adbot: ADBOT LOVES YOU

# ? May 15, 2024 18:23

zedprime: Jun 9, 2007; yospos

The real thing you just realized is that the hair washers and never hair washers are an unmendable schism who's interactions make 8th century Catholic-Muslim relations look chumly.

# ? Feb 13, 2023 21:12

Manager Hoyden: Mar 5, 2020

Do what you want but please only take grooming advice from people who look well-groomed, and hair advice from people who have hair

# ? Feb 13, 2023 21:15

FreudianSlippers: Apr 12, 2010; Shooting and Fucking
are the same thing!

I wash myself with a rag on a stick.

# ? Feb 13, 2023 21:22

Brawnfire: Jul 13, 2004; 🎧Listen to Cylindricule!🎵
https://linktr.ee/Cylindricule

Nothing cleanses like the oil and strigil.

# ? Feb 13, 2023 21:25

Poopelyse: Jan 22, 2011; by Fluffdaddy

DontMockMySmock posted:

The shorter your hair is, the more often you need to shampoo it. Your sebaceous glands produce the same amount of oil no matter how long your hair is, and that oil coats your hair. The more hair you have, the longer it takes for the oil to build up and coat all of it. There's also obviously some variation based on genetics or whatever.

I have very short hair and I shampoo every single day or else my hair gets oily and clumpy.

And if you have long hair, you have the opposite problem of not enough oil, which is what conditioner is for.

would this explain why my (bald) head is always so oily? like do the glands keep going despite my hair loss?

# ? Feb 13, 2023 22:11

SLOSifl: Aug 10, 2002

Poopelyse posted:

would this explain why my (bald) head is always so oily? like do the glands keep going despite my hair loss?

Fig. 1 Oil vents erupt at regular intervals, showering the surface in viscous human grease

# ? Feb 13, 2023 22:20

zedprime: Jun 9, 2007; yospos

Poopelyse posted:

would this explain why my (bald) head is always so oily? like do the glands keep going despite my hair loss?

That's just the cue ball fairy. They come and shine your head with a greasy polishing cloth every night because the fae are agents of chaos who can not be appeased.

# ? Feb 13, 2023 22:24

Ragnar34: Oct 10, 2007; Lipstick Apathy

Surely the head lubes itself naturally when it realizes you're going for maximum aerodynamics.

# ? Feb 13, 2023 23:42

Grassy Knowles: Apr 4, 2003; "The original Terminator was a gritty fucking AMAZING piece of sci-fi. Gritty fucking rock-hard MURDER!"

run on sentience posted:

Just wash your hair, and rear end too, since apparently that's not common sense. You are not the one person on the planet whose sweat, oil, and buildup of bacteria and dead skin cells doesn't stink. You are not the one person whose body doesn't produce this buildup and thus doesn't require a chemical to remove it.

Also dry shampoo doesn't clean your hair, it's meant as a very temporary means of soaking up excess oil and just adds to the buildup if you don't wash it. Can also lead to scalp infections. Often looks like clumpy dandruff after a few hours.

And here is where run on sentience just realized that just because they are a white person with short straight hair doesn't mean everyone is

# ? Feb 13, 2023 23:53

credburn: Jun 22, 2016; A tangled skein of bad opinions, the hottest takes, and the the world's most misinformed nonsense. Do not engage with me, it's useless, and better yet, put me on ignore.

Does anyone else just wash their scalp/hair with a bar of soap, the same as every other part of their body?

# ? Feb 13, 2023 23:58

Captain Splendid: Jan 7, 2009; Qu'en pense Caffarelli?

The classic Batman and Spider Man theme tunes are both standard 12-bar blues, meaning you can sing one on top of the other.

# ? Feb 14, 2023 00:36

run on sentience: Mar 22, 2022

Grassy Knowles posted:

And here is where run on sentience just realized that just because they are a white person with short straight hair doesn't mean everyone is

Long thick wiry hair actually.

Please educate me which kinds of people don't stink when they go days without washing themselves.

# ? Feb 14, 2023 00:53

Grassy Knowles: Apr 4, 2003; "The original Terminator was a gritty fucking AMAZING piece of sci-fi. Gritty fucking rock-hard MURDER!"

run on sentience posted:

Long thick wiry hair actually.

Please educate me which kinds of people don't stink when they go days without washing themselves.

You know well and good that we�re talking about using shampoo or not specifically on hair, no one has seriously suggested avoiding soaping bodies. You�re taking the most annoying strawman vocal minority of people who aren�t even in this thread and acting like they�re representative of what is being said here. Which ends up in you parroting what white men say about Black people being dirty, whether intended or not.

# ? Feb 14, 2023 01:18

FreudianSlippers: Apr 12, 2010; Shooting and Fucking
are the same thing!

Yacubite Devils stink regardless of how much they try to scrub their sin away but the Original Chosen Hebrews always smell nice.

# ? Feb 14, 2023 01:22

Cable Guy: Jul 18, 2005; I don't expect any trouble, but we'll be handing these out later...; Slippery Tilde

I don't use shampoo...

I prefer the real thing.

# ? Feb 14, 2023 03:56

Unkempt: May 24, 2003; ...perfect spiral, scientists are still figuring it out...

I simply collect all of my oil and sell it to George W Bush who famously loves that poo poo.

# ? Feb 14, 2023 04:06

Leave: Feb 7, 2012; Taking the term "Koopaling" to a whole new level since 2016.

Cable Guy posted:

I don't use shampoo...

I prefer the real thing.

Oh ew

# ? Feb 14, 2023 04:42

Poopelyse: Jan 22, 2011; by Fluffdaddy

SLOSifl posted:

Fig. 1 Oil vents erupt at regular intervals, showering the surface in viscous human grease

lmao

# ? Feb 14, 2023 05:04

Incelshok Na: Jul 2, 2020; by Hand Knit

Poopelyse posted:

lmao

You should watch Mad God

# ? Feb 14, 2023 08:01

Creature: Mar 9, 2009; We've already seen a dead horse

I�m a bald man. When I stay in hotels I always use all the conditioner because it feels lovely on my stunted little follicles and leaves me smelling delightful. 🌷

# ? Feb 14, 2023 13:43

3D Megadoodoo: Nov 25, 2010

I once washed my balls with Fairy (lemon-scented) and it was fine. What thread is this anyway?

# ? Feb 14, 2023 13:46

ThisIsJohnWayne: Feb 23, 2007; Ooo! Look at me! NO DON'T LOOK AT ME!

3D Megadoodoo posted:

I once washed my balls with Fairy (lemon-scented) and it was fine. What thread is this anyway?

It's the "faces of Finnish alcoholism" thread now

# ? Feb 14, 2023 13:54

3D Megadoodoo: Nov 25, 2010

I just got off opioids I haven't had a drink in ages.

# ? Feb 14, 2023 13:56

Milo and POTUS: Sep 3, 2017; I will not shut up about the Mighty Morphin Power Rangers. I talk about them all the time and work them into every conversation I have. I built a shrine in my room for the yellow one who died because sadly no one noticed because she died around 9/11. Wanna see it?

SLOSifl posted:

Fig. 1 Oil vents erupt at regular intervals, showering the surface in viscous human grease

# ? Feb 14, 2023 15:57

freeedr: Feb 21, 2005

3D Megadoodoo posted:

I just got off opioids I haven't had a drink in ages.

Congrats and I am proud of you

# ? Feb 14, 2023 16:36

Spek: Jun 15, 2012; Bagel!

DontMockMySmock posted:

The shorter your hair is, the more often you need to shampoo it. Your sebaceous glands produce the same amount of oil no matter how long your hair is, and that oil coats your hair. The more hair you have, the longer it takes for the oil to build up and coat all of it. There's also obviously some variation based on genetics or whatever.

I have very short hair and I shampoo every single day or else my hair gets oily and clumpy.

And if you have long hair, you have the opposite problem of not enough oil, which is what conditioner is for.

This is the exact opposite of my experience. I used to have very long hair and not shampooing even for just a couple days would have it incredibly oily. Which was particularly annoying because of wearing glasses, and the hair oil somehow smearing the lenses constantly even though I almost always had it in a pony tail.
Then I started just shaving my head every 3-6 months and don't even bother to shampoo any more. My hair isn't oily at all until it gets to about 4.5ish months growth. Once it starts getting oily is usually when I realize it's a good time to shave it all off again.

# ? Feb 14, 2023 16:59

TooMuchAbstraction: Oct 14, 2012; I spent four years making
Waves of Steel
Hell yes I'm going to turn my avatar into an ad for it.; Fun Shoe

Spek posted:

This is the exact opposite of my experience. I used to have very long hair and not shampooing even for just a couple days would have it incredibly oily. Which was particularly annoying because of wearing glasses, and the hair oil somehow smearing the lenses constantly even though I almost always had it in a pony tail.
Then I started just shaving my head every 3-6 months and don't even bother to shampoo any more. My hair isn't oily at all until it gets to about 4.5ish months growth. Once it starts getting oily is usually when I realize it's a good time to shave it all off again.

Protip for folks with long hair: a French braid goes a long way to helping keep it under control. They're especially nice when sleeping, because if a single strand somehow gets pulled on, it'll distribute the force to a bunch of other follicles instead of yanking out and being painful.

# ? Feb 14, 2023 17:27

Pneub: Mar 12, 2007; I'M THE DEVIL, AND I WILL WASH OVER THE EARTH AND THE SEAS WILL RUN RED WITH THE BLOOD OF ALL THE SINNERS

I AM REBORN

Walter Matthau has giant gorilla hands.

I won't remember my mom's birthday until the day I die, but this will stick in my head forever. Maybe a lobotomy would be for the best.

# ? Feb 16, 2023 07:01

KillHour: Oct 28, 2007

Covski posted:

Bed sheet ghosts are a thing because ghosts were depicted as returning wearing their burial shrouds, not as a weird way to try to simulate etherealness.

Actually the story behind it is pretty interesting, traditionally ghosts were described generally dressed as they had normally looked when they lived, but the burial shroud/bedsheet look became the cultural norm as an artistic shorthand for showing someone being a ghost in illustrations and plays - if they're dressed like normal people it's a lot harder to tell at a glance.

There are preserved reports from as a early as the mid 1700's of people terrorizing neighbourhoods by dressing up as spooky bed sheet ghosts, pretty cool.

I, too, saw the YouTube video you learned this from :v:

# ? Feb 16, 2023 07:49

Brawnfire: Jul 13, 2004; 🎧Listen to Cylindricule!🎵
https://linktr.ee/Cylindricule

Pneub posted:

Walter Matthau has giant gorilla hands.

I won't remember my mom's birthday until the day I die, but this will stick in my head forever. Maybe a lobotomy would be for the best.

More like Walt them mitts tho

# ? Feb 16, 2023 14:09

Cable Guy: Jul 18, 2005; I don't expect any trouble, but we'll be handing these out later...; Slippery Tilde

Pneub posted:

Walter Matthau has giant gorilla hands.

I won't remember my mom's birthday until the day I die, but this will stick in my head forever. Maybe a lobotomy would be for the best.

Walter was a good guy...

# ? Feb 17, 2023 00:03

3D Megadoodoo: Nov 25, 2010

There's a "Young Fleksnes" spin-off of world-famous TV series "Fleksnes" and... the kid actually looks like the original as young :prepop:

# ? Feb 17, 2023 11:29

FreudianSlippers: Apr 12, 2010; Shooting and Fucking
are the same thing!

Everybody's favourite show:
Flesh Ness

# ? Feb 17, 2023 11:59

Leave: Feb 7, 2012; Taking the term "Koopaling" to a whole new level since 2016.

FlekSNES, the successor to the Switch

# ? Feb 17, 2023 13:13

Hirayuki: Mar 28, 2010

3D Megadoodoo posted:

There's a "Young Fleksnes" spin-off of world-famous TV series "Fleksnes" and... the kid actually looks like the original as young

Needs a chin dimple.

# ? Feb 17, 2023 14:36

credburn: Jun 22, 2016; A tangled skein of bad opinions, the hottest takes, and the the world's most misinformed nonsense. Do not engage with me, it's useless, and better yet, put me on ignore.

Hirayuki posted:

Needs a chin dimple.

That dimple looks like a decades-old BB gun wound

# ? Feb 17, 2023 14:48

3D Megadoodoo: Nov 25, 2010

Hirayuki posted:

Needs a chin dimple.

I'm on it!

# ? Feb 17, 2023 14:53

Brawnfire: Jul 13, 2004; 🎧Listen to Cylindricule!🎵
https://linktr.ee/Cylindricule

credburn posted:

That dimple looks like a decades-old BB gun wound

Maybe there's an origin episode where he gets it.

Also "FLEKSNES" looks exactly like a word neuralblender would spit out, right down to the font style.

# ? Feb 17, 2023 15:00

Adbot: ADBOT LOVES YOU

# ? May 15, 2024 18:23

Captain Hygiene: Sep 17, 2007; You mess with the crabbo...

Brawnfire posted:

Also "FLEKSNES" looks exactly like a word neuralblender would spit out, right down to the font style.

That was the first thing I noticed, and I had to double check which thread I'd clicked on.

# ? Feb 17, 2023 16:17

The Something Awful Forums > Main > Post Your Favorite: Carefully Curated > PYF Thing You Just Realized: Everyday someone on Earth takes the world's biggest shit

«‹›484 »