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(Thread IKs: sharknado slashfic)
 
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Victor Vermis
Dec 21, 2004


WOKE UP IN THE DESERT AGAIN
Asking for a friend

edit:

The worst snipe ever.

Victor Vermis has issued a correction as of 03:16 on Mar 18, 2023

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blatman
May 10, 2009

14 inc dont mez


dont ponder a cow unless its perfectly spherical, frictionless, and in a vacuum

Rickshaw
Apr 11, 2004

just a coconut going for a stroll

Victor Vermis posted:

Have there been any literary works on decoding godhood?

Like maybe the mystery of creation can actually be boiled down to the easily-digestible recurring plot devices of a CBS primtime crime drama?

Mash some numbers together, draw some squigglies on a chalkboard. Bip bap boom, wine to water, I AM THE SON OF GOD

?

The Mystery of the Aleph: Mathematics, the Kabbalah, and the Search for Infinity

Just a Moron
Nov 11, 2021

blatman posted:

dont ponder a cow unless its perfectly spherical, frictionless, and in a vacuum

There is no other kind

Orbis Tertius
Feb 13, 2007


reading this reminded me of a question that was bugging me a couple months ago, which was if time travel was considered a plausible explanation for the apparent instantaneous transmission of information between entangled particles, i.e. “spooky action at a distance”, because it doesn’t require FTL travel (maybe?) I have a lay understanding so I couldn’t really answer the plausibility question, but it was fun to Google about.

With this CPT symmetric universe idea, what if entangled particles in our universe are also entangled with their antiparticle pairs in the mirror bizarro universe. if that universe is time-reversed (causality reversed), could that explain why “spooky action” between entangled particles seems instantaneous (because they’re entangled with the causally reversed antiparticle)?

:okpos:

Celexi
Nov 25, 2006

Slava Ukraini!
how big is you guys ufos

Rickshaw
Apr 11, 2004

just a coconut going for a stroll

IIRC there are some interpretations of quantum mechanics that explain quantum weirdness in terms of time fuckery. The transactional interpretation, and consistent histories come to mind.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Transactional_interpretation

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Wheeler%E2%80%93Feynman_absorber_theory

PokeJoe
Aug 24, 2004

hail cgatan


my gf brought me home a "leprechaun" bracelet 👽

Orbis Tertius
Feb 13, 2007

Rickshaw posted:

IIRC there are some interpretations of quantum mechanics that explain quantum weirdness in terms of time fuckery. The transactional interpretation, and consistent histories come to mind.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Transactional_interpretation

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Wheeler%E2%80%93Feynman_absorber_theory

see like, I doubt I could have found those pages in any Wikipedia hole, just using the vocabulary I’m familiar with.

thanks for the links!

Riot Bimbo
Dec 28, 2006


Victor Vermis posted:

Have there been any literary works on decoding godhood?

Like maybe the mystery of creation can actually be boiled down to the easily-digestible recurring plot devices of a CBS primtime crime drama?

Mash some numbers together, draw some squigglies on a chalkboard. Bip bap boom, wine to water, I AM THE SON OF GOD

?

columbo was on NBC

Riot Bimbo
Dec 28, 2006


columbo is esoteric and im not justifying this, just get ripshit blazed, start on season 1, and keep going till you get it

bedpan
Apr 23, 2008


CBT-symmetric universe theory

Victor Vermis
Dec 21, 2004


WOKE UP IN THE DESERT AGAIN

Riot Bimbo posted:

columbo is esoteric and im not justifying this, just get ripshit blazed, start on season 1, and keep going till you get it

Give us your best synopsis.

Someone weekly posted synops(es?) throughout COVID in the anti-gently caress&suck thread and even then, in the belly of the beast, I wasn't even a little bit tempted to watch it.

Riot Bimbo
Dec 28, 2006


Victor Vermis posted:

Give us your best synopsis.

Someone weekly posted synops(es?) throughout COVID in the anti-gently caress&suck thread and even then, in the belly of the beast, I wasn't even a little bit tempted to watch it.

columbo missed me for a long, long time but it's probably the only show im comfortable rooting for a cop because he's always nailing some rich shithead to a cross over their depraved sicko poo poo and it rules

like he's absolutely a work of fiction but it's just great. columbo owns.

Fuck You And Diebold
Sep 15, 2004

by Athanatos

Riot Bimbo posted:

columbo missed me for a long, long time but it's probably the only show im comfortable rooting for a cop because he's always nailing some rich shithead to a cross over their depraved sicko poo poo and it rules

like he's absolutely a work of fiction but it's just great. columbo owns.

ALL cops are bastards

Victor Vermis
Dec 21, 2004


WOKE UP IN THE DESERT AGAIN

It's true.

but even Fully Automated Luxury Gay Space Communism wouldn't be possible without a few hot dog necks shouting,


HEY

NO RUNNING

Orbis Tertius
Feb 13, 2007

it was hard, putting down old yeller/Columbo

Riot Bimbo
Dec 28, 2006



columbo is the exception that proves the rule

because he literally cannot exist, his character is more physically impossible than anything I or anyone else has discussed itt

and columbo is best boy #1.

Victor Vermis
Dec 21, 2004


WOKE UP IN THE DESERT AGAIN

Riot Bimbo posted:

columbo is the exception that proves the rule

because he literally cannot exist, his character is more physically impossible than anything I or anyone else has discussed itt

and columbo is best boy #1.

Alright alright alright,

Let's fuckin cool it on the wonky eye comments

Victor Vermis
Dec 21, 2004


WOKE UP IN THE DESERT AGAIN
:patriot: non-sequitur salute to the American Patriots who lost their lives under the mountain. :patriot:



RIP bros

Victor Vermis
Dec 21, 2004


WOKE UP IN THE DESERT AGAIN
Tag yourself:



I'm the UNDERGROUND SHUTTLE TO LOS ALAMOS voluntarily de-railing into the literal depths of humanity's profane machinations, flipping a big ol' bird to the cosmos as I disappear into the elevator shaft to hell

Victor Vermis
Dec 21, 2004


WOKE UP IN THE DESERT AGAIN
Me, slathered in alien gore, cracking whatever vaguely gland-like objects I just yanked from their frail zero-gravity frames:

Orbis Tertius
Feb 13, 2007

Victor Vermis posted:

Tag yourself:



I'm the UNDERGROUND SHUTTLE TO LOS ALAMOS voluntarily de-railing into the literal depths of humanity's profane machinations, flipping a big ol' bird to the cosmos as I disappear into the elevator shaft to hell

…it was a hard sell, but I can tell the office gang really appreciates the convenience.

Yours,
Fred
BSBA, MHRM

Fuck You And Diebold
Sep 15, 2004

by Athanatos
why do the elevators go down beneath the bottom floor? what are they hiding??

Victor Vermis
Dec 21, 2004


WOKE UP IN THE DESERT AGAIN

gently caress You And Diebold posted:

why do the elevators go down beneath the bottom floor? what are they hiding??

UFOexitOOOO

Victor Vermis
Dec 21, 2004


WOKE UP IN THE DESERT AGAIN
Anybody know of any good stories (translated to film, obviously), in which humans are just absolute savage sickos to aliens?

I used a trial version of a video editing suite to create a compilation of joaquin pheonix beating an alien to death with a baseball bat but I feel like I could use a few more sources of inspiration for my daily wind-up. TIA

Slavvy
Dec 11, 2012

That is an entire genre of literature called humans gently caress yeah

If you must have video I recommend the documentary series 'farscape'

Orbis Tertius
Feb 13, 2007

the zombie genre is rife with nihilistic, low fi ultra violence (is that the desired vibe?)

the zombies in Wild Zero are technically extra terrestrial in origin

Victor Vermis
Dec 21, 2004


WOKE UP IN THE DESERT AGAIN

Slavvy posted:

That is an entire genre of literature called humans gently caress yeah

If you must have video I recommend the documentary series 'farscape'

Orbis Tertius
Feb 13, 2007

This is a cool movie: Electric Dragon 8000V

Riot Bimbo
Dec 28, 2006


Victor Vermis posted:

Alright alright alright,

Let's fuckin cool it on the wonky eye comments

wow rude!

peter falk doesn't deserve this

Victor Vermis
Dec 21, 2004


WOKE UP IN THE DESERT AGAIN

This film has 4 keywords and one of them is "tetsuo".

Anime, ironically, suppresses the visceral aspect of the human anima we will rely upon to survive the inevitable confrontation with space foes.

We all make mistakes, friend, but do you think this is a loving game?

Victor Vermis
Dec 21, 2004


WOKE UP IN THE DESERT AGAIN
Goodnight friends, I'm going to go punch up my letter to the criterion collection petitioning for the inclusion of the most pro-human piece of media ever produced:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ikkykcv_L7Y

Orbis Tertius
Feb 13, 2007

Victor Vermis posted:

This film has 4 keywords and one of them is "tetsuo".

Anime, ironically, suppresses the visceral aspect of the human anima we will rely upon to survive the inevitable confrontation with space foes.

We all make mistakes, friend, but do you think this is a loving game?

may I tentatively suggest that keywords determined by aggregate input from anon internet people do not really capture the thing itself?

call me presumptuous or whatever but I think you’ll like this. (don’t stress over the lack of subtitles, it communicates just fine with imagery)

Orbis Tertius has issued a correction as of 09:13 on Mar 18, 2023

endocriminologist
May 17, 2021

SUFFERINGLOVER:press send + soul + earth lol
inncntsoul:ok

(inncntsoul has left the game)

ARCHON_MASTER:lol
MAMMON69:lol
The tetsuo referred to is the iron man one

WEH
Feb 22, 2009

high pitched orb hovers over house

NUFORC posted:

Thank you for allowing me to share my own story.

Back in July 1969, I was a teenager of 16 yrs old. I was lying in bed semi-asleep, when a high-pitched sound started. This sound was like a pure sinewave tone, I would estimate around 10Khz to 15Khz. I thought it was the cheap table fan on the small table by the window - it was a hot night.

So I went to shut it off, thinking the motor maybe needed oiling, and I'd do that the next day.My parents and sisters were alseep in their rooms, and I didn't want to wake them by going down the squeaky stairs to the basement for oil. When I shut the fan off, the noise continued, and seemed to come from outside. I walked over to the window, which was open, and looked out.

What I saw was utterly amazing to me! Hovering motionless over Mr Allen's roof which was about 150 feet away, was this globe-like thing. It was about 5 or 6 feet in diameter, perfectly round, and was a dark greyish semi-shiney color. It just hovered there, not moving, and I kept hearing that "whistle/tone" that I mentioned before. There were no lights on it.

I went to my parents bedroom and woke my mom up, but she complained that I was goning to wake my dad up - I told her to come to my room, she refused and told me to go back to bed and shut up. So I went back to my bedroom, and sat by the window, watching that thing, amazed by it. After about 20 minutes, it literally flew straight up in the air and disappeared, and instantly that sound stopped, like turning off a switch. The speed of this thing was almost instant, like 500 miles an hour I would guess. It just vanished! I weant back to bed, lay there and eventaully drifted off to sleep.

But I'll never forget what I saw, and I know it wasn't a dream, because the next day mom confronted me about waking her up the night before.

I've talked about this to others, and the usual response was typical - that I was making this story up.

But I know better.

I'm not dumb.

Thanks again for allowing me to share this.

disks accompanied by sonic booms

NUFORC posted:

I was ten years old. I went outside to the lawn area next to the pool where our apartment manager was setting up tables for later in the day, to have a BBQ and get together. It was still early and no one was setting off their fireworks yet. We lived only 3-4 miles from Moffet NAS. I heard a very deep rumbling sound which I knew was a sonic boom. But it was deeper and louder than I had ever heard before. We both looked up at exactly the right moment to see two or three eliptical disks swoop over very low and fast. The low one that caught my attention was dull silver on the bottom but burnished orange on the side and top from the reflected sunlight. It was only 150 feet off the ground. They may have been playing 'chicken' to see who could fly lower. The higher one(s), were identical but I did not see any sunlight reflect off of it (them). They were a little bit bigger across than the wingspan of a P-3 Orion sub-chaser, of which I saw everyday in those years. It happened so fast I only got a good look at the lower craft.

After they went by I looked at the manager and said "Did you see those... I was was going to say, flying saucers, until I noticed his face was white as a sheet. So I said ...rockets". He went inside, probably to get a drink. I thought to myself "Well, flying saucers yeah, their real what's the big deal?" The only question I had at that time and still have whenever I see ufo's, (14 other sightings) is who does it belong to? Ours or theirs? Whoever these guys are they have a flight path that comes in low from the Pacific in a straight line from Daly City down to Sunnyvale then onward. Fun fact. Line it up on a map and it continues down to Southern Nevada. They usually come in on July 4th or close to it. Examples of other fly-ins I've noticed, 8:30pm 7-2-87 VERY loud boom. Approx. 12:45am 7-5-91. This leads me to believe that it may be a re-supply of some kind for "alien" personel. As our guys usually have federal holidays off. Fair warning for '03. Try to see them.

gigantic "bow tie" shaped object

NUFORC posted:

Summer 1969 in California's Cachuma Lake campgrounds 2 friends and I rented a boat.

While sitting in the back of our rented boat with the nose in the air we could only look up.

We thought it was a kite at first because of its' shape. The high cloud cover it was weaving in and out of was way too high for it not to be huge.

We turned off our engine and heard nothing.

What we saw was more than 10 sizes of a commercial airline.

It was white or light matt gray and shaped like a bow tie.

One of the sides of the "tie" seemed to move or blur.

Our parents still remember how scared we were when we told them.

skeletal chevron w/ flares. weird kite? no fabric tho. odd

NUFORC posted:

This sighting occured on July 4th, but I am not completely sure of the year. I was around 15 years old, which would have been 1969.

At that time I lived in Jacksonville Beach, Fl. which is located on the Atlantic Ocean. Every year on the 4th of July my town would have a spectacular fireworks display, better than many large cities. They would shoot the fireworks out over the ocean. Huge crowds would gather every year, sometimes as many as 100,000 people.

It was near dark and I went out in my driveway to look at the sky. If it was dark enough, I was going to walk down to the beach to see the display. The sun had either gone down or was behind the distant treeline, but it was still fairly light.

As I was looking up I saw a very strange Flying-V object. It had 4 or 5 bright red flares on each side connected by what appeared to be narrow black tubes. It was flying the way you would expect a V shaped object would, with the point going first. The flares looked like the red flares you often see on the 4th of July that glow brightly and float down slowly. The little tubes were narrow and very black. It reminded me of Tinker-Toys when you connect those round wood shapes with the longer rods they provide you. This object was very low in the sky. I would estimate it was only 100 feet high at most. It flew directly over my head, heading due North. This object did not look large at all. I would estimate its wingspan at maybe 8-10 feet. Somehow it reminded me of a box-kite. It also made a "sizzling" sound, sort of like when you fry bacon. Also, faint wisps of black smoke were floating off the flares. I would estimate this object was traveling at 15-20 miles per hour. I could see it plain as day.

At first I thought it was some sort of new firework that I had never seen before. But it was strange. I could not figure out what was making it move through the sky. It was not shooting fire out the back or anything like that. And the faint smoke coming from it was not shooting backward like a form of propulsion, but just floating away from the red flare balls. I continued to watch this object, expecting it to eventually descend. But it did not. It maintained a steady altitude and speed. That was what really got to me. It just kept on going. I knew no firework could do that. I continued to watch this object until it sailed out of sight to the north. I watched it for at least 2-3 minutes and it never did come down. Finally it grew so small and disappeared from my view.

This object did not scare me like other objects I would see years later. It did not appear to be a craft that could be manned. It was just these balls and rods. It had no body to it at all. But it was under some type of control.

disk emerges from orange colored area of water

NUFORC posted:

we were on a family vacation in Alaska, it was my moms birthday and dad had chartered a fishing trip. We left at about 7am and went out about 12 miles into the sound from Valdez. at 10:53 I checked my watch because I saw an orange tint in the water and the captain had suggested we try another spot. so four of us fishing for halibut started to retrieve our lines. One fellow had caught a shark ... we killed it and threw it overboard just a moment before.

Suddenly the water fourty feet from the boat exploded into the air and the water really turned orange for three hundred feet around the splash. A disk shaped object with windows and lights shot up out of the water to about one thousand feet above. It hovered there. The next thing I remember is the water around the boat was teaming with sharks and i had hooked one. after gafing a four footer and returning it to the sea...i again checked my watch and it was 11:10. we headed away from the spot and i asked the others if they saw the strange craft. NO ONE remembered seeing it at all except for me.

The craft was about 25 feet in diameter had a rotating edge around it near the bottom which was dark in color like black sand. it was about six feet tall with portholes or windows 3 feet apart on the main body of the craft which did not rotate.

I think i should draw a picture instead.

large object w/ "stinger" zig-zagging around fresno

NUFORC posted:

Approx. july 1969 (before moon landing) My friend and I saw a craft slowly come into view making slow zig zag patterns in the south eastern sky above fresno. it came down to approx. 500--1000 feet. the shape was hard to make out but it looked part retangle and part saucer with a dome shape on top. As it seemed to stop moving we noticed the dark outline of what we called a stinger protruding from the bottom center of the craft. The craft looked to be about 125ft long and 35ft high, the stinger looked about 20ft long. after it stoped a lite shower of dull sparks (embers) emitted from the bottom of stinger in a cone shape. the glowing died out as the embers fell. (it looked like the embers from professionl fire works as they fall to the ground and slowly die out). the craft had lights and what looked like windows on different levels and most of the length of it. After the ember showers the craft started its zig zag pattern but going away from us. We would look at each other than look back up and everytime we did this the craft would start moving faster and further untill the last time we looked at each other and looked up-- it had diapeared.(we did not know at the time that this was a typical reported movement). We also swore to each other that we would not tell anybody because they would think we are crazy.

today when I do tell the story to a select few all I get is rolled up eyes and looks that I am crazy. My friend and I were about 17 years old at the time and we were not on alcohol or drugs. I have been a full time professional Firefighter for 30 years. I know airplanes, helicopters and weather balloons, obviously this was none of those. I forgot to say there was never any noise made by this craft and it was about 10 pm. We were not into ufo's back then and did not have any preconception of ufo's. one night about 5years ago I was listening to the art bell show and I thought I heard a caller say something about a ufo they saw with sparks emitting from the bottom but it was the end of ! the conversation and I was half asleep. Ive wanted to tell this story for along time. I hope to hear from somebody that has seen the same thing.

Nuclearmonkee
Jun 10, 2009


gently caress You And Diebold posted:

These other models are poo poo because they have to come up with some particle to make it work whereas my theory

Oh wait

We might have accidentally detected some right handed neutrinos going backwards with a balloon/ORB in Antarctica (ANITA). Follow up experiments with the IceCube detector https://icecube.wisc.edu/news/research/2020/01/icecube-rules-out-last-standard-model-explanation-of-anita-anomalous-neutrino-events/ eliminated easy possibilities that made the observation fit with the standard model. Its very hard to detect something that only interacts with gravity or a near massless object traveling along a time reversed axis but the theory is looking pretty good so far. There’s experiments moving forward to figure out if the universe is indeed that weird and laughs at our meat brain perception of time.

Copenhagen interpretation and the standard model can eat a dick. The orbs will light the way.

500excf type r
Mar 7, 2013
Probation
Can't post for 2 hours!
Columbo looks like a human Moe Szyslak

Slavvy
Dec 11, 2012

500excf type r posted:

Columbo looks like a human Moe Szyslak

Surely it's the other way around

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500excf type r
Mar 7, 2013
Probation
Can't post for 2 hours!

Slavvy posted:

Surely it's the other way around

No I think this is a case of "life imitates art"

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