Glumwheels posted:

Exactly, he’s more likely to go for Kari Lake

the milk machine posted:

my parents agree with yours

“at least bush wasn’t on twitter all day!” Jfc this country continues to be doomed

Glumwheels posted:

https://mobile.twitter.com/oneunderscore__/status/1637876817313800212?cxt=HHwWqICxnbOS9LotAAAA

DrPossum posted:

I watched this live and it was just such a stupid moment in our history.

Mokelumne Trekka posted:

as much as "lol trump will win" posting is fun I gotta say I'm honestly stumped.

thought Trump would win in 2020, the outcome was outrageous in its own fashion with J6 and all the lawsuits, nevertheless he lost. thought 2022 midterms would be a bloodbath for Dems, with insane election vote tampering and non-certification, etc. none of which happened.

I'm sure 2024 will be a bizarre chimera of all sorts of insane predictions/possibilities but not what ppl expect

Sherbert Hoover posted:

cspam has been wrong about basically everything since its inception

smarxist posted:

time to clench boys
https://twitter.com/unusual_whales/status/1637768193526644736?s=20

Louisgod posted:

civil war 2 is going to be so loving funny

quote:

HUNTSVILLE, AL–For the 135th straight year since Gen. Robert E. Lee's surrender at Appomattox, representatives for the South announced Monday that the region has postponed plans to rise again.

"Make no mistake, the South shall rise again," said Knox Pritchard, president of the Huntsville-based Alliance Of Confederate States. "But we're just not quite ready to do it now. Hopefully, we'll be able to rise again real soon, maybe even in 2001."

Pritchard's fellow Southerners shared his confidence.

"Yes, sir. The South will rise again, and when it does, I'll be right up front waving the Stars and Bars," said Dock Mullins of Decatur, GA. "But first, I gotta get my truck fixed and get that rusty old stove out of my yard."

"Lord willing, and the creek don't rise, we gonna rise again," said Sumter, SC, radiator technician Hap Slidell, who describes himself as "Southern by the grace of God." "I don't know exactly when we're gonna do it, but one of these days, we're gonna show them Yankees how it's done."

"Save your Confederate dollars," Slidell added. "You can bet on that."

The Deep South states of Alabama, Georgia, Mississippi, South Carolina, Louisiana, and Tennessee consistently rank at the bottom of the nation in a wide variety of statistical categories, including literacy, infant mortality, hospital beds, toilet-paper sales, and shoe usage. Even so, some experts believe the region could be poised for a renaissance.

"The way things stand, things in the Deep South almost have to get better. Otherwise, the people who live there will devolve into preverbal, overall-wearing sub-morons within a century," said Professor Dennis Lassiter of Princeton University. "Either Southerners will start improving themselves, or they'll be sold to middle-class Asians as pets."

"My constituents are decent, hard-working folk," said Sen. Jesse Helms (R-NC), despite overwhelming evidence to the contrary, in his 22nd annual "Next Year, By God!" speech on the steps of North Carolina's capitol building. "We are a proud people who mayn't have all that much fancy-pants book-learnin', but we live and die with pride in our proud heritage and the dignity of our forebears."

Helms' speech was met with nearly 25 minutes of enthusiastic hoots and rebel yells by the 15,000 drunk, unemployed tobacco pickers in attendance.

Though Southerners are overwhelmingly in favor of rising again, few were able to provide specific details of the rising-again process.

"I don't know, I reckon we'll build us a bunch of big, fancy buildins and pave us up a whole mess of roads," said Bobby Lee Fuller of Greenville, MS. "I ain't exactly sure where we're gonna get the money for that, but when Johnny Reb sets his mind to something, you best get out of his way."

"Oh, it'll happen, sure as the sun come up in the morning," said Buford Comstock, 26, a student at Over 'N' Back Diesel Driving School in Union City, TN. "The South is gonna rise up, just as soon as we get together and get all our poo poo back in one sock. Then, look out, Northerners!"

"Yesiree," Comstock added, "one day soon, the Mason-Dixon Line will be the boundary between a great nation and one whose time done passed."

Louisgod posted:

civil war 2 is going to be so loving funny

VideoKid posted:

he’ll just pardon himself bing bong

Mokelumne Trekka posted:

as much as "lol trump will win" posting is fun I gotta say I'm honestly stumped.

thought Trump would win in 2020, the outcome was outrageous in its own fashion with J6 and all the lawsuits, nevertheless he lost. thought 2022 midterms would be a bloodbath for Dems, with insane election vote tampering and non-certification, etc. none of which happened.

I'm sure 2024 will be a bizarre chimera of all sorts of insane predictions/possibilities but not what ppl expect

bedpan posted:

sadly, many posters were not wrong about joe biden being dreadful

Mokelumne Trekka posted:

as much as "lol trump will win" posting is fun I gotta say I'm honestly stumped.

thought Trump would win in 2020, the outcome was outrageous in its own fashion with J6 and all the lawsuits, nevertheless he lost. thought 2022 midterms would be a bloodbath for Dems, with insane election vote tampering and non-certification, etc. none of which happened.

I'm sure 2024 will be a bizarre chimera of all sorts of insane predictions/possibilities but not what ppl expect

Sherbert Hoover posted:

cspam has been wrong about basically everything since its inception

Mokelumne Trekka posted:

as much as "lol trump will win" posting is fun I gotta say I'm honestly stumped.

thought Trump would win in 2020, the outcome was outrageous in its own fashion with J6 and all the lawsuits, nevertheless he lost. thought 2022 midterms would be a bloodbath for Dems, with insane election vote tampering and non-certification, etc. none of which happened.

I'm sure 2024 will be a bizarre chimera of all sorts of insane predictions/possibilities but not what ppl expect

alnilam posted:

the one guiding principle that cspam has been correct about is "whatever the stupidest possible outcome is, that is what will happen"

Consummate Professional posted:

I would never say…https://twitter.com/atrupar/status/1637877597810950144?s=12

Louisgod posted:

civil war 2 is going to be so loving funny

euphronius posted:

he should have

idiot

ArmZ posted:

can you pardon someone for future crimes? inquiring minds want to know!

Sherbert Hoover posted:

cspam has been wrong about basically everything since its inception

Atrocious Joe posted:

As an abolitionist I can't support the use of carceral measures against Trump. Isn't it possible to find alternative, healing solutions to help him correct his past mistakes?

euphronius posted:

yes

Glumwheels posted:

Idk, these idiots think nail guns penetrate bullet proof glass and are afraid their shadows are feds

ArmZ posted:

every president is an idiot then!

Sherbert Hoover posted:

Sherbert Hoover posted:

trump, thinking he's about to be indicted, on the only man who can protect him: maybe he fucks boys!!

Sherbert Hoover posted:

our long-awaited socialist wave being stopped by this man

gregday posted:

lol every time I remember that’s a cinnamon bun not a chicken wing

gregday posted:

lol every time I remember that’s a cinnamon bun not a chicken wing