Let's Read Animorphs! The Whole Series! Ch-ch-ch-chaaanges

The Something Awful Forums > Archives > Comedy Goldmine > Let's Read Animorphs! The Whole Series! Ch-ch-ch-chaaanges

«‹›236 »

Capfalcon: Apr 6, 2012; No Boots on the Ground,
Puny Mortals!

Ravenfood posted:

The Andalites being so consistently lovely is incredibly believable and yet seems like such a bold choice for a "YA" book. I love it.

It really does rule. The powerful are never your friend, and they must be forced into doing the right thing is a great lesson for a children's series.

Capfalcon fucked around with this message at 13:25 on Mar 27, 2023

# ? Mar 27, 2023 13:03

Adbot: ADBOT LOVES YOU

# ? May 28, 2024 11:02

disaster pastor: May 1, 2007

Epicurius posted:

quote:
<Captain Asculan issues the following orders: Four morphing cubes will be made available to aristh Aximili to use as he sees fit. Aristh Aximili is hereby elevated to the rank of prince. Prince Aximili is appointed liaison between the Andalite fleet and the people of Earth.>

Asculan�s officer waited, expecting a reply.

Ax said, <Thank the captain for me. I will carry out my duties to the best of my ability. My challenge is hereby withdrawn.>

Just wanted to highlight how this was foreshadowed (intentionally or accidentally) all the way back in The Andalite Chronicles.

disaster pastor posted:

Epicurius posted:

quote:
<This can�t be right,> I moaned. <The StarSword is my home. We�re going to find that Yeerk task force and destroy them.>

<Yeah, yeah, I know. And you�ll be a big hero and they�ll make you a prince without even slowing down to make you a warrior.>

<That�s not what I was thinking,> I lied.

Big finale spoiler: Elfangor turns out to be a great hero, of course, but not quite this great. Ax, on the other hand...

# ? Mar 27, 2023 13:30

Soonmot: Dec 19, 2002; Entrapta fucking loves robots; Grimey Drawer

I hope we get a view of how the andalite citizenry view this. Having the communications going out to the civilians really cinched things here.

# ? Mar 27, 2023 16:25

Flowers For Algeria: Dec 3, 2005; I humbly offer my services as forum inquisitor. There is absolutely no way I would abuse this power in any way.

Soonmot posted:

I hope we get a view of how the andalite citizenry view this. Having the communications going out to the civilians really cinched things here.

Much like the average citizenry from a developed country, they�ll just care about Earth as a tourist destination and come to sample the cinnamon bunz-uh.

# ? Mar 27, 2023 18:15

freebooter: Jul 7, 2009

quote:

�Our victory could never have occurred without the support of our Andalite friends.�

Translation: Look, we�re willing to share the credit. You people did squat for us, but we�re willing to spread the kudos around freely.

Not only did the Andalites never do jack for Earth, but the Animorphs were probably pivotal in the allied victory on Leera.

Epicurius posted:

i guess suffering has made Alloran humble, i'll say that even though not a lot of attention is paid to Ax over the course of the series beyond him being the butt of jokes, this is a very different Ax than the one we first met.

Ax is often comic relief but I think we see a lot more of him than just being butt of the jokes - he gets some of the best books in the series, certainly some of the ones that are most important to the overall sense of Andalites as simultaneously potential saviours/destroyers that we see concluding here, and I always liked his character arc of being lost and lonely in a strange foreign world, and ending up becoming partly loyal to it so that he feels torn between his two people.

I thought it odd at first that neither of these two chapters was narrated by him, but I actually think it works better watching the culmination of that arc in third person. It's a troubling reminder for the humans that they're still vulnerable to the decisions of a superior power, but also that that power has its own factions and they have their own allies within it. Even long before this point, they never would have made it this far without Ax on the team.

quote:

<If my challenge fails I will be harshly disciplined,> Ax said. <I will be exiled. Permanently. And my tail blade � My tail blade will be cut off.>

Sounds like more Cinnabon time to me. Win-win.

# ? Mar 28, 2023 00:40

Capfalcon: Apr 6, 2012; No Boots on the Ground,
Puny Mortals!

freebooter posted:

Not only did the Andalites never do jack for Earth, but the Animorphs were probably pivotal in the allied victory on Leera.

In complete fairness, I bet the Andalites did a ton of damage to the Yeerk forces around Earth in the first book, but yeah, after that, Earth has been on its own.

# ? Mar 28, 2023 00:56

Ravenfood: Nov 4, 2011

Couldn't Ax just morph and regain the tail blade that way?

# ? Mar 28, 2023 03:10

feetnotes: Jan 29, 2008

Yeah, the only tailless Andalite that shows up is Mertil-Iscar-Elmand and he has an "allergy" to morphing so he can't grow it back. Guess we can only assume the act itself is super dishonorable, even if Ax could repair it.

# ? Mar 28, 2023 04:00

Tree Bucket: Apr 1, 2016; R.I.P.idura leucophrys

You're a loose cannon, Aximili. Hand in your badge and tail-blade.

# ? Mar 28, 2023 04:08

Epicurius: Apr 10, 2010; College Slice

Chapter 9 - Cassie

quote:

Things happened quickly.

With terms now approved, the Yeerks on the Pool ship formalized their surrender.

The Pool ship joined the Andalite fleet in entering close Earth orbit where we contacted the remaining Yeerk ships and gave them the stark choice: Resist and die, or surrender and be transformed.

Some Yeerk ships contacted the Yeerk home world and received instructions to fight. But the Andalites had all the technical data of the Pool ship - including disabling codes, combat tactics, communications ciphers. The ships that resisted were destroyed. The rest surrendered.

The Yeerk crews were shuttled to the Pool ship where they left their host bodies to return to the now-refilled pool. Newly freed human and Hork-Bajir worked with Andalites to keep the ships flying.

Jake had one more run-in with Asculan over possession of the great trophy prisoner, Visser One.

But Jake won that confrontation, too. Visser One remained our prisoner.

We Animorphs and the newly minted Prince Aximili, with our prisoner, landed Ax�s official liaison ship, a sleek Fast-Courier, right in the middle of the Mall in Washington. Not a mall, the Mall, a sort of open green space with the Capitol Building at one end, the Smithsonian Institution and various government buildings on both sides, and the obelisk of the Washington Monument at the far end.

We called ahead, not wanting to terrify anyone. There were roughly a thousand cops and twice that many newspeople waiting for us.

It was, as Marco said, a �shiver-my-spine moment.�

A sea of microphones and video cameras and flashbulbs. Ax and Jake, and to a lesser extent Marco and I, gave a sort of brief explanation of what had been happening, and where things stood now.

Needless to say, it was kind of a big news day.

Tobias was silent throughout. If he even heard the questions he didn�t show it. And then, as

Marco was telling yet another amusing anecdote, Tobias spread his wings, caught an updraft, and flew away. The next day an Andalite scout ship reported finding a human body floating in space. Young, female. The Blade ship had jettisoned her body before going into Zero space. The Andalites brought her to California. Near the devastation that was all that was left of our homes.

I was there when Rachel returned. Her mother was there, too. The Andalites treated her body with great respect. She had been wrapped in some sort of soft cloth. I guess it was the Andalite way.

They uncovered her face and Rachel�s mom and I identified her.

Two days later, Rachel�s body was cremated. It was inconceivable that she�d ever want to be buried in the ground. She ended up as a few handfuls of ashes in a pretty china urn.

Everyone was at the memorial ceremony. By this point our story had swept the planet. Everyone alive knew our names.

The memorial had to be held outside. Fortunately it was a nice day. You could see the Pacific Ocean from the spot in the cemetery where Rachel�s monument would be placed. There was an honor guard of free Hork-Bajir. Two dozen Andalite warriors stood at attention. Our friend and ally General
Doubleday was there and quite a few men and women in uniform.

Jake and Marco and me and Ax. We all gave little speeches. The President of the United States was there. He gave a speech, too.

I guess Rachel would have liked it, in her own way. She would have laughed. She would have thought it was all way over the top, but at the same time, she would have liked the attention. Would have, but she was a few ounces of ash in a jar resting inside an open wooden box.

The ceremony was almost over when I saw him. I�d been watching the sky. I knew if he was still alive, he would come.

He wheeled high overhead, riding a thermal. His hawk eyes would see everything of course, even from half a mile up.

But as the band played some horribly depressing music, down he came. He swooped down and landed on the box, wings flaring. One of the ushers moved to chase him off. Jake took the man�s arm. Tobias closed his talons around the urn�s small handle. He glared fiercely at Rachel�s mom. She was crying, had been all along. She sobbed and nodded her head, giving her permission.

Then Tobias looked at me. I said, �Yes, Tobias. She would want it.�
I
don�t know where he found the strength to lift that urn, but he did. He flew away, low at first, rhen, catching a thermal, he bore the urn away into the sky.

and that's Rachel's goodbye. i think she would want it....instead of being in some monument, to be with Tobias.

Chapter 10-Marco
One year later

quote:

My career was going pretty well. I was past the point of being a fad, anyway. I�d done seven appearances total on Letterman and Leno, plus several times each on Jon Stewart and Conan. The Today Show, Good Morning America, Oprah? Been there. Bill O�Reilly called me a genuine American hero. I�d been on CNN so many times that Greta Van Susteren and I were practically roommates. Guest-VJ on MTV? Of course.

And all of that is over and above the rounds of interviews that came in that first wild month after the defeat of the Yeerks. I mean, in that first month you couldn�t keep track of how many shows I�d been on. Jake and Cassie and I were bigger than all of Hollywood, D.C., and Manhattan put together. We weren�t just celebrities, we were the only celebrities. We had senators and big-league rap producers and hot starlets fetching us sodas and Kit Kat bars. So cool.

That first month we owned the world. But that was the easy part: We had a story to tell and everyone wanted the details of how we and our weird alien friend and all our animal morphs had saved the world. The tough part was to keep it going after we stopped being The New Thing.

I had become the unofficial spokesman for the Animorphs. Jake wasn�t interested in doing it. Neither was Cassie. And as for Tobias, well, no one had seen him or heard from him since Rachel�s funeral.

It wasn�t that Jake and Cassie never gave interviews, but Jake was too serious and heavy for the media. Jake was on his way to becoming this icon, this national hero figure. He had that whole tragichero thing going on. People knew about him sending his cousin to take out his brother and they ate it
up. I am not kidding when I say that some congressperson actually suggested carving his face onto Mount Rushmore. Nothing came of that, fortunately.

So, anyway, everyone acted like they wanted Jake to do their show, but Jake wasn�t really into that game and the bookers for the shows knew it. Jake did not do good panel. He wouldn�t sit there and trade jokes with Dave. There was too much he didn�t want to talk about. Jake was still carrying the world on his shoulders, and it showed.

As for Cassie, well, she was worse, if that�s possible. She had the tendency to wander around in all the moral subtext of everything. She�d take some story about a cool, rock �em sock �em battle we�d been in and turn it into this mope about the morality of self-defense.

So basically, with neither of those two being, shall we say, Hollywood, that job fell to me. Bread and butter, baby. Could I do panel? Sure I could do panel. I was as much of a hero as any of the Animorphs and unlike Jake the Yeerk-Killer and Saint Cassie, I was fun.

I got a gig as �technical advisor� to a Spielberg movie about us. Animorph. Come on, you gotta love that. I did all the shows to plug that deal. Sample dialog: �I loved working with Steven, he is absolutely devoted to accuracy, and I knew he was the man who could be trusted with our story.�

I wrote a book, with some help from a ghostwriter. The title was The Gorilla Speaks. Number one on The New York Times best-seller list, number one on the PW list, number one on the Web.

Cassie wrote a book, too: Insights on the Animal Mind. I think it topped out around number seven. Not that I�m competitive.

I had just been signed for a regular acting job. I was going to be Nick Lang, a wisecracking mutant superhero sort of guy who can turn into animals. I wasn�t the main star, I was the main supporting player, (and the main special effect), which is what I wanted: I needed time to �work on my craft� without the pressure of carrying the entire TV show. We were going to be on Fox in the old X-Files time slot, which was kind of cool.
The acting job was especially great because it kept me alive as a product spokesman. I had a three-year deal with Pepsi, plus smaller deals with Alamo Rent A Car and Gap/Old Navy. You would not believe the money.

So, a year after the end, I was seventeen and rich from book deals and product endorsements and acting contracts. I had a beach house in Santa Barbara (close to Hollywood, but with less traffic) and an apartment in New York. I owned a canary-yellow Viper, a red Maserati, and a desert-camouflage Humvee. I dated girls who wouldn�t have looked at me before. I ate in cool restaurants. And maybe you�re expecting me to say it was all an empty experience, that my life wasn�t all that great, but you know what? I was happy.

We all should have been happy. Cassie was Undersecretary of the Interior for Resident Aliens. It paid less than I spend on corn chips, but hey, Cassie was seventeen, like me, and she was meeting with the President and spending most of her time with the free Hork-Bajir. They�d been given
Yellowstone as a habitat. They lived on bark and cared for the trees and the tourists loved it.

Yellowstone was so mobbed with tourists wanting to see Hork-Bajir swinging from the redwoods or whatever that there was a year-and-a-haIf waiting list to get in.

Arbron�s Taxxons - those that had survived the battle - had fulfilled another of Cassie�s farseeing dreams: They had, as agreed, permanently morphed to anaconda and various other way-too-big snakes. They�d been relocated to the Brazilian rain forest, which was now protected by Brazilian law and hefty U.N. payments. If you were a guinea pig walking around the rain forest now you were toast, but the former Taxxons left people alone.

Arbron himself went down there with them. He could not morph again, of course. He was an Andalite nothlit. Many years ago, far away, he had stayed too long in Taxxon morph and had been unable to demorph. And now he was Taxxon for good.

Arbron was shot and killed by poachers. It was a big incident for a while. They caught the poachers and put them away. Everyone said how terrible it was. But you know, Arbron was probably grateful. He had saved his adopted people, but he had been a prisoner of that awful Taxxon hunger,
and that�s no way to live.

The Andalite ambassador to the United Nations took charge of the body - what was left of it. Arbron was flown back to the Andalite home world and given a quiet funeral.

Anyway, Cassie was a government pooh-bah, always racing around here and there in government jets and helicopters, making sure Toby and her people were good and just generally saving the world. Also taking college courses at night because she still wants to be a veterinarian like her mom and dad. That�s Cassie for you: Save the rain forest, save some cow with a hernia - the girl just does not get the whole celebrity thing. I mean Wal-Mart practically begged her on hands and knees to take a million dollars to do ads for their jeans, and she said she didn�t have time because there was some controversy over an access road into some forest somewhere.

It boggles my mind.

And Ax was doing great as well. He was an official prince and this huge hero back on his home planet. He had stepped out of Elfangor�s shadow at long last, and was not only a hero but the one and only expert on all things human.

Andalite tourism was the coming thing. The numbers were limited - interstellar travel isn�t cheap, you know. But the big thing was for wealthy or influential Andalites to come to Earth and acquire human morphs. Then it was off to the mall food courts to raid the Cinnabon and Mrs. Fields. I am not kidding. An Andalite with a mouth is a dangerous thing when there are cinnamon buns around. Having no mouths or sense of smell themselves, they have no natural defenses against the appeal of flavor - as we had witnessed time and again with the Ax-man himself. You do not want to
get between a newly morphed Andalite tourist and a chocolate chip cookie.

Andalites and humans mostly got along well. Andalite civilians are about three degrees more humble and lovable than the Andalite warriors we�d always met.

Some people had been afraid the news that aliens were real would freak the entire human race. They were wrong. Duh. Humans had been watching Star Trek and Star Wars and reading Heinlein and Simmons and Orson Scott Card for too many years. Humans weren�t freaked by aliens - they�d been expecting them for years and were just relieved they weren�t The Borg.

Ax worked out technology-transfer deals with some of the big corporations. They have to keep it slow because if you just dump a hundred years of technological advances overnight the stock market goes nuts. It worked out okay, though. The Andalites can definitely teach us a lot about computer
architecture. But it was Microsoft and Sony and Adobe and Nintendo that came up with the killer apps. I mean, the new Palm Pilots will be actual pilots.
The Andalites flatly refused to let us share their weapons technology. But NASA has had a definite revival: The first human Zero-space vehicle will be built jointly by Boeing and Lockheed and be ready for launch in three years. H. sapiens was going to the stars. Look out, universe, we�re coming to build a Starbucks near you.

As for Jake, well, my boy Jake has always had a serious side to him. I mean, I tried to talk to him about things. But some guys shake off a war and move on, and other guys don�t. Jake carried Tom and Rachel and those seventeen thousand Yeerks around his neck like the
Ancient Mariner and his albatross.

Being Jake he didn�t lose it. He didn�t go off and become some kind of drug addict or have some big breakdown or whatever. He was still Jake. But he was a different Jake. Smaller and bigger at the same time, if that makes any sense. He was closed off, inward. He would sound almost like the old Jake sometimes but you just got this sense that he was out of phase with everyone else. Like he was a half step ahead or behind.

Of course this just made him into the strong and silent type and he always was a big, goodlooking guy, so he got marriage proposals (and other proposals) from girls as young as twelve and women old enough to be his grandmother.

No interest.

He loved Cassie, of course, but I don�t know what happened there. I know when I talk to Cassie I ask her if she�s seen him and the answer is always no. The same when I talk to Jake, although he always says he�s just about to call her, just about to.

Write a book? No thanks.

Endorsements? No thanks.

Every college on the planet tried to recruit him. No thanks. West Point offered him a gig as an instructor in the Tactical Application of Emerging Technologies and Xeno-Warfare. No thanks. If he�d been old enough he could have run for president as the candidate of Democrats and Republicans both.

Jake was the biggest hero the world had ever seen because he was a hero for all humans, not one nation. He had saved the lives and freedom of the entire human race. I mean, he could have snapped his fingers and had anything he wanted.

The problem was, he didn�t want anything. Except for Tobias to come back! For Rachel and Tom to be alive. For the chance to unlive one fateful moment when he gave the order that doomed seventeen thousand defenseless Yeerks.

I worried about him.

Okay, I worried about him while sitting by my pool or driving my Maserati or escorting some bubbly Hollywood honey past the rope line at the most exclusive clubs. I worried about him.

I hadn�t seen Jake or Cassie in a couple of months when my lawyer called to say the date had been set.

And now, the three of us would be together again. In The Hague, Netherlands.

We were to testify in the war crimes trial of the Yeerk prisoner, Visser One.

Hey, Marco got what he wanted, to be rich and a big celebrity. Cassie isn't, but she's doing what she wants to do, Jake is pretty haunted by his experiences, and Ax is serving as a liaison.. This catches us up with what's been going on over the past year with everyone ....and people were asking what Andaliite civilians are like, and the answer is pretty cool, honestly. Civilian Andalites are a lot more chill than their military, humans and Andalites get along pretty well, and rich Andalites come to earth to see the sights and gorge on food,

# ? Mar 28, 2023 05:45

Vandar: Sep 14, 2007; Isn't That Right, Chairman?

Arbon deserved better.

# ? Mar 28, 2023 06:13

JesusSinfulHands: Oct 24, 2007; Sartre and Russell are my heroes

I thought that was a very well written description of Jake's PTSD.

I have heard people speculate that Marco's parents didn't last after the war was over - his omission of how they're doing is notable - what do y'all think?

# ? Mar 28, 2023 06:15

Mazerunner: Apr 22, 2010; Good Hunter, what... what is this post?

JesusSinfulHands posted:

I thought that was a very well written description of Jake's PTSD.

I have heard people speculate that Marco's parents didn't last after the war was over - his omission of how they're doing is notable - what do y'all think?

at the very least his lie about the timing of his math teacher's infestation would probably come out once she was freed. That would be... a mess.

# ? Mar 28, 2023 08:16

Comrade Blyatlov: Aug 4, 2007; should have picked four fingers

Oof.

quote:

I guess Rachel would have liked it, in her own way. She would have laughed. She would have thought it was all way over the top, but at the same time, she would have liked the attention. Would have, but she was a few ounces of ash in a jar resting inside an open wooden box.

Ooooooooof.

# ? Mar 28, 2023 08:54

Zore: Sep 21, 2010; willfully illiterate, aggressively miserable sourpuss whose sole raison d�etre is to put other people down for liking the wrong things

Arbon's death is absolutely brutal. Dude lived for like 20 years as a Taxxon, finally won a kind of freedom for his adoptive people and ends up going down less than a year later for no real reason other than some senseless violence.

And while Marco's calling attention to how Jake and Tobias clearly aren't handling the post war very well, its also telling that Cassie seems to be coping by piling herself so full of things to do she doesn't really have time to think. She's working as an undersecretary and taking college classes at the same time, she definitely looks like she's on the path to burnout.

# ? Mar 28, 2023 10:07

Strom Cuzewon: Jul 1, 2010

quote:

Two days later, Rachel�s body was cremated. It was inconceivable that she�d ever want to be buried in the ground. She ended up as a few handfuls of ashes in a pretty china urn.

loving hell this crushed me.

This is what really elevates Applegate's writing style above other YA books for me. Yeah the writing style is simple, but there's something about this direct and sober treatment of anguish and grief that is just outstanding.

# ? Mar 28, 2023 12:29

disaster pastor: May 1, 2007

JesusSinfulHands posted:

I thought that was a very well written description of Jake's PTSD.

I have heard people speculate that Marco's parents didn't last after the war was over - his omission of how they're doing is notable - what do y'all think?

I don't think Marco would have omitted it if his parents had split up, especially given how much of his arc was getting them back together. It'd go along with the tone of the chapter more IMO if he mentioned it and brushed it off, or if he used it to point out how his life wasn't all sunshine and roses, but he was handling things better than Jake. Because the thing Marco is secretly best at out of all of them is coping. Whatever you throw at him, he can get over it and move on.

Jake can't, though, and I also like seeing his aftermath through Marco's eyes. Marco knows why Jake can't cope or move on, he has a pretty complete and accurate assessment of Jake's mental state (including how it looks to other people who don't know him), he knows exactly why Jake feels this way, and he takes it seriously, he just can't feel the same way. Marco's life looks shallow because in many ways it is, but he's not lying: he's happy, Jake and Cassie aren't, and he gets it but that ain't him.

# ? Mar 28, 2023 13:27

Rochallor: Apr 23, 2010; ふっっっっっっっっっっっっｃｋ

quote:

Alloran turned his main eyes to me. He gave me a strange look. <I never hoped to be free again. You freed me. I have done what I have done in my life. I am what I am, though I may have gained at least some wisdom through the years of enslavement to Visser One. Just the same, I will always be
Alloran, the Butcher of Hork-Bajir. Alloran, the only Andalite to be taken alive by the Yeerks. But, disgraced, even despised, for whatever I am worth, I am yours to command.>

The speech was delivered in a low thought-speak tone, all emotion severely controlled. But then Alloran whipped his tail blade over his head, so fast it cracked like a whip. He smiled the subtle Andalite smile and yelled, <Do you know who did that? Do you know who moved my tail? I did. I did. I did it.>

I smiled, but more for him than for me. If he would forever be the Butcher of Hork-Bajir, what would my name be?

This is from a few chapters back, but it strikes me that in this moment that Alloran gets exactly the happy ending that Jake wanted for Tom.

# ? Mar 28, 2023 15:15

Malpais Legate: Oct 1, 2014

I got kinda misty-eyed at the image of Tobias flying off with Rachel's urn.

Rip Rachel, who mattered.

# ? Mar 28, 2023 15:59

pastor of muppets: Aug 21, 2007; We were somewhere around the Living Hive, on the edge of the desert, when the drugs began to take hold...

I hope we get at least one Tobias chapter. It's gut-wrenching that he only just got his reunion with Loren only to turn his back on human life.

Rochallor posted:

This is from a few chapters back, but it strikes me that in this moment that Alloran gets exactly the happy ending that Jake wanted for Tom.

I haven't read up to this point, but I know the broad strokes of what happens in this ending arc. That said, Alloran's fate (if we're calling it that, I know there's still a lot of book left) was a pleasant surprise. I didn't realize he would play such a crucial role in such a pivotal moment in the endgame.

# ? Mar 28, 2023 16:51

freebooter: Jul 7, 2009

disaster pastor posted:

I don't think Marco would have omitted it if his parents had split up, especially given how much of his arc was getting them back together. It'd go along with the tone of the chapter more IMO if he mentioned it and brushed it off, or if he used it to point out how his life wasn't all sunshine and roses, but he was handling things better than Jake. Because the thing Marco is secretly best at out of all of them is coping. Whatever you throw at him, he can get over it and move on.

Jake can't, though, and I also like seeing his aftermath through Marco's eyes. Marco knows why Jake can't cope or move on, he has a pretty complete and accurate assessment of Jake's mental state (including how it looks to other people who don't know him), he knows exactly why Jake feels this way, and he takes it seriously, he just can't feel the same way. Marco's life looks shallow because in many ways it is, but he's not lying: he's happy, Jake and Cassie aren't, and he gets it but that ain't him.

I think this is on the money. I think Cassie is also doing well, too - an extremely driven person, yes, but not necessarily as a coping mechanism for trauma. "Under-secretary for resident aliens" sounds like a bit of a ceremonial title, a formalisation of her existing relationship with the free Hork-Bajir and morphed Taxxons.

Two things about this wrap-up that never occurred to me as a kid:

- Extremely depressing that this confirms the Blade Ship got away, which aside from meaning they go off to terrorise other parts of the galaxy, it means that on the great day of freedom for thousands of enslaved humans, there's still a few dozen of them who not only remain enslaved but are shanghaied off forever into a vast and alien galaxy

- The Andalites refuse to pass the morphing tech on any further, but there must be a non-zero number of former human Controllers walking around California now who were given the morphing power as host bodies in the closing months of the war and therefore retain it after being freed. Pretty sweet compensation for the horrifying experience of body slavery: for the rest of your life you have full access to Thermals.

# ? Mar 28, 2023 22:39

OctaviusBeaver: Apr 30, 2009; Say what now?

Didn't Rachel die as a bear? Why does she have a human body?

# ? Mar 29, 2023 01:20

Rochallor: Apr 23, 2010; ふっっっっっっっっっっっっｃｋ

She demorphed after getting poisoned and the morphed polar bear killed her.

They don't get into it but I assume the funeral was closed casket.

# ? Mar 29, 2023 01:33

Zore: Sep 21, 2010; willfully illiterate, aggressively miserable sourpuss whose sole raison d�etre is to put other people down for liking the wrong things

I figure you can also handwave it a bit as the Ellimist making sure they found her body. Its so low stakes it probably doesn't matter for his game with Crayak since she died anyways.

# ? Mar 29, 2023 01:41

nine-gear crow: Aug 10, 2013

Rochallor posted:

She demorphed after getting poisoned and the morphed polar bear killed her.

They don't get into it but I assume the funeral was closed casket.

Marco says she was cremated so there was no casket at the funeral.

# ? Mar 29, 2023 01:44

Epicurius: Apr 10, 2010; College Slice

Chapter 11-Cassie

quote:

�Is Jake here yet?� I asked Marco. I figured I might as well find out right away. I wasn�t eager to see Jake. I mean, yes, I was. But the Jake I was eager to see might not even exist anymore. The Jake I wanted to see was the one who had talked about us being together after the war was over.
The war was over. We weren�t together. Now, this reunion was just bound to be awkward if not painful.

�I haven�t seen him,� Marco said.

�When did you get here?�

�Here?� Marco looked around, puzzled. We were in the modern lobby of one of The Hague�s best hotels. �Oh, here at the hotel? I�m not staying at the hotel. My business manager set me up in a rented villa. There�s a fence, a gate, it�s easier to keep the groupies away.�

I laughed and he grinned in response. �You�re actually completely serious, aren�t you?� I asked.

�Cassie, how long have you known me? Am I ever completely serious?�

I felt a wave of affection for Marco. We had never been the closest of the Animorphs - our connection went through Jake, it wasn�t direct. But here we were, in some way the only two real survivors. We had even prospered. Each of us was far better off by most measures than we�d have been without the war.

�Is Jake staying at this hotel?� I asked.

Marco nodded. Then, with sudden fire, he said, �I wish he would see you, Cassie. You�re what he needs. I mean, I try and talk to him but you know Jake, he can go totally opaque when he wants to. You ask him if he�s okay, he says, �Sure.� You ask him if he needs anything, it�s �No, I�m good.� But he never seems to do anything. Not that I know of anyway.�

�How often do you see him?� I asked.

Marco started to answer, stopped, gave a guilty shrug. �Officially? As in, I see him and he sees me?�

�Ah. You�re spying on him?�

�I�m still an Animorph. I still like to fly. Maybe I�m in eagle morph and I happen to see him.�

�So how is he, really?�

�I�m not exactly a psychiatrist, Cassie.�

I wasn�t going to accept that. �Marco, you have a very subtle mind and you�re a good observer. And he�s your best friend.�

The waitress brought us beverages and a plate of some kind of snack. She gave us the familiar �I know you!� smile and left only reluctantly.

�She wants me,� Marco said. Then, realizing that I wasn�t going to be diverted, he sighed and said, �Like I say, I�m no psychiatrist. But he�s depressed. You know, like not just sad but something deeper? Like clinically depressed. Like a party balloon with half the helium gone. Like a flashlight with low batteries. He hangs around the house with his mom and dad. Sometimes he�ll go for a drive - you know, at least he kept the free Jaguar. I mean, if he�d refused that I�d have had to kill him personally. And,� Marco added with a significant look, �he goes to see her.�

I knew who Marco meant by �her.�

�He doesn�t put flowers on the memorial or whatever, there are always lots of those. He goes when no one�s around, late, after hours. The guys at the gate let him in. He parks and just kind of sits there like he�s hanging out with her. I don�t think he talks to her. Sad as it is to say, I wish he did. Talking to a dead person is better than not talking at all. He sits there for an hour, sometimes two, stares out at the ocean. Watches the sun go down. Then he leaves. Sometimes I think he�s waiting there hoping Tobias will show up.�

Tears were welling in my eyes. The image was too sad. I�d been to Rachel�s memorial too. But not like that. �Rachel would be so mad at him.�

�Yeah,� Marco agreed. �Get over it. Shake it off. That�s what she�d say.�

�You think that�s what he should do? Shake it off?�

�Don�t you?�

I wasn�t sure what I thought. �Sometimes I�m ashamed that I have moved on, you know? I guess I wonder if there�s something wrong with me when I enjoy the day, or enjoy my job or my classes.�

�You still morph?� Marco asked.

The question surprised me. �Yeah. Of course. I � I don�t know, I guess I couldn�t see why I shouldn�t. It helps with my job. It�s just easier getting around way back in the woods if I�m flying, or in wolf morph.�

�I can�t be sure, but I have this feeling Jake hasn�t morphed since � since.�

�It gives you a different perspective,� I said. �I mean, I�ve often wondered if allowing someone to morph to dolphin or falcon or whatever might not be a good way to let them put the little stuff in perspective.�

�Morph therapy? I think I feel another best-selling book coming on. Oh, man, Oprah would eat that up. And you know the Andalites are saying now they may make morphing technology more widely available on Earth.�

I frowned. �Really? Why?�

�They want a Krispy Kreme franchise back on the home world. You have a fair number of Andalites who possess a human morph now, all back home after their tour on Earth. Still looking for a donut.�

The idea was so absurd I had to laugh. �We�re going to trade donuts for morphing technology?�

Marco and I sat there in silent enjoyment for a moment, sipping our Oranginas.

�I think you�re right,� Marco said after a while.

�About what?�

�Morph therapy. I think it could be useful when someone is in a funk, let�s say.�

I looked at him to see whether he was kidding. He looked back. All of a sudden neither of us was kidding.

it actually might be a good therapy. and, hey, the Andelites get Krispy Kreme.

Chapter 12-Jake

quote:

��Did conspire to subjugate the people of Earth through subversion, terror, and violence. Four. That the defendant did conspire to overthrow all legitimate forms of government through subversion, terror, and violence. Five. That the defendant did commit numerous acts of attempted murder. Six. That the defendant committed murder in the specifics contained in appendix 2C. Seven. That the defendant committed or caused to be committed numerous acts of torture in the specifics contained in appendix 2D. Eight. That the defendant did ��

The reading of Visser One�s indictment was going to take a while. The War-Crimes Tribunal didn�t have a death penalty, just prison. The prosecutors said he was eligible for something like eight hundred years in prison. And since they had about a hundred witnesses drawn from former human-
Controllers, Hork-Bajir, and we Animorphs, there wasn�t much question about the outcome. Alloran would not be allowed to testify. It came too close to being self-incrimination, the courts said.

It had taken a year to organize the trial. The biggest problem was how to have the accused be present and involved in the proceedings. There was no way the visser could be allowed to take a host body. I mean, how does a court order one of the very things it considers a crime?

Fortunately Ax�s people were willing to help. Very willing. Andalite technicians created a Yeerk box. It was about the size of a hardcover book. It contained a miniaturized Kandrona source, a computer-interface, and a voice synthesizer. The visser could hear and �see� and speak. The box,
painted lavender for some obscure Andalite reason, sat on a pedestal facing the curved judges� bench.

There was a panel of five judges, American, Dutch, Chinese, Kenyan, and Chilean.

The visser had half a dozen appointed lawyers. They looked very professional, very slick, and like they knew they had zero chance.

There was a gallery down one side of the courtroom for media. They had crammed what looked like a hundred cameras of every conceivable type into a space smaller than a men�s room. The whole world was watching. We were live on every station everywhere. The building was ringed with security. Probably half the people sitting in the audience were security or intelligence people. American, French, British, Russian, Chinese, Indian, Israeli � it was
like a security convention. And that wasn�t even counting the overt security inside the room, a dozenheavily armed Dutch Special Forces guys.
People were very determined that the visser not escape.

Marco leaned close and whispered, �If anyone so much as farts there�s going to be about ten thousand rounds fired off before you can say, �It wasn�t me!��

I smiled.

Marco was enjoying this. But then, he enjoyed the attention. If he made it through his testimony without making a dozen bad jokes I�d be amazed.
Cassie was sitting just beyond him. We had exchanged smiles and awkward hugs. I had dreaded this for months. I didn�t know what to say to her. I didn�t seem to know what to say to anyone lately.

Maybe I was getting stupid in my old age.

Part of me wanted what we�d had in the old days, Cassie and me. But that wasn�t possible. I knew that. I had come to accept that all of that, all of what I�d had with Cassie, Tobias, Ax, even Marco, all of it was �in the war.� And the things that were �in the war� didn�t seem to translate into real life. Like they were written in incompatible computer languages or something.

I still cared for Cassie, for all of them. I always would. My life was divided into three parts: before, during, and after the war. And that middle section was so overwhelming, so big, so intense, it made the other two portions seem dim and dark and dull.

That�s how I felt now, pretty much all the time. Dark. Dull. Slow and stupid. Distracted, but not by anything in particular. Just like there was something else I should be thinking about but I couldn�t recall what it was.

I understood Tobias. I didn�t think he ran away out of rage or even out of grief. I mean, maybe at first, yeah, but I wondered if maybe, like me, he wasn�t just looking for simplicity. Maybe.

Why wasn�t Marco like that? He thrived on it all. The attention, the fame, the excitement. Maybe he was just more resilient.

Ax was to my right. Not sitting, they had removed chairs so he and Alloran and an official Andalite legal observer named Salawan could stand comfortably.

�� mayhem. Sixteen. That the defendant did perform medical experiments upon human subjects without permission. Seventeen. That the defendant did drive more than a million people from their homes. Eighteen. That the defendant did ��

I wondered what the visser thought of all this. It was a very un-Yeerkish scene. The Yeerks reserved trials only for the highest-ranking officers. And they would certainly never try a member of a different species. They had quicker, more direct ways of dealing with aliens.

Suddenly the reading of the indictment was over. The prosecution was ready to call its first witness.

�We call Jake Berenson.�

I stood up. My legs were stiff from sitting.

I walked to the front and sat down in a chair placed in a little booth so that I faced the judges and the defendant. It seemed odd to see Alloran, the face I associated with Visser One, standing behind the prosecution desk, free, while my enemy was represented by a blank lavender box.

�The defense objects to this witness.�

A murmur through the courtroom. Visser One�s head lawyer was on her feet looking nervous and smug at the same time.

The president of the court, the Chilean judge, leaned forward. �What is the nature of your objection?�

�Your honor, this witness should himself be under indictment as a war criminal. If the alleged war crimes of the Yeerk military officer, Visser One, are to be tried in this court, it must be in the pursuit of impartial justice. Truly impartial justice cannot be applied only against one side in a
conflict. If my client is to be tried for his actions in the human-Yeerk war, then so must the actions of this witness. With all due respect to this court, this witness is a mass murderer. A war criminal.�

The objection was denied. My testimony was to proceed. But I found I couldn�t speak. I felt like I was choking, like the air wouldn�t come.

Billions of people were watching my reaction. Billions of people saw me freeze. Billions of people thought, This is the famous Jake the Yeerk-Killer? He doesn�t look like much.

�Apparently the witness is having some difficulty,� Visser One�s lawyer said with only the slightest smirk.

�The witness is disconcerted by this unjustified and vicious assault,� the prosecutor said heatedly.

The Chinese judge asked if I needed a moment to compose myself.

�No,� I said. �I�m ready.� But I wasn�t. I was fighting the urge to run from the room.

�State your name and occupation, for the record.�

�Urn, Jake Berenson. My occupation? I guess I�m unemployed.�

�Are you a student?� the prosecutor suggested helpfully.

�No. Not really.�

�All right. Please tell the court how you first became aware of the presence on Earth of the Yeerk species.�

�All right,� I said. But then memory crowded in and pushed the court into the shadows. I remembered being at the mall with Marco and Tobias. We ran into Rachel and Cassie. We decided to walk home together. We decided to take a shortcut through the construction site.

A light in the sky.

The Andalite fighter. The wounded alien creature, the Andalite, staggering, falling.

The attack of the Yeerks. Chapman.

Seeing Tobias morph to a cat.

My first morph.

My first battle. The Yeerk pool.

The realization that Tom was one of them.

The decision, not my decision, that I was the leader. Marco inventing the name: Animorphs. Leader of the Animorphs.

The tiger. My battle morph so many times. So many battles.

The prosecutor prodded me with questions. I answered them. But memories filled the courtroom.

I couldn�t get them out of my head. And each question triggered more.

When they adjourned for the day I didn�t notice at first. I�d been on the stand for just an hour, I had barely begun my testimony. And then would come cross-examination.

What was the matter with me? I knew I was screwed up. I knew I�d made a fool of myself. I�d let everyone down.

I left the courtroom straightaway and found my way back to my hotel room. I sat on the bed and just held my head in my hands and stared. I don�t know how long.

I heard a noise. I looked up.

A gorilla.

Marco, of course. Cassie was demorphing, rising from the carpet in one corner. Out of the corner of my eye I saw Ax.

<Hey, Jake,> Marco said.

Then he swung his cinder block gorilla fist into the side of my head..

That's actually a pretty good depiction of PTSD.

# ? Mar 29, 2023 04:22

Mazerunner: Apr 22, 2010; Good Hunter, what... what is this post?

The beatings will continue until morale improves

# ? Mar 29, 2023 05:03

Comrade Blyatlov: Aug 4, 2007; should have picked four fingers

.....Marco just killed Jake. I guess his PTSD won't bother him now?

# ? Mar 29, 2023 05:25

Zore: Sep 21, 2010; willfully illiterate, aggressively miserable sourpuss whose sole raison d�etre is to put other people down for liking the wrong things

Esplin being a smug poo poo and having his lawyers try to call Jake out as a fellow war criminal here at the Hague is the part of the book that always stuck with me, no idea why.

I'll also say the legal precedents and throw away lines here are kind of insane in a lot of ways. Like not being able to call a host as a witness against their Yeerk is some wild poo poo

# ? Mar 29, 2023 06:38

Avalerion: Oct 19, 2012

Having a trial for all this just seems super weird. Would an alien even be subject to earth/human laws?

The vissier's box is another idea that might have prevented this whole war if they thought of it sooner, huh. There's probably enough space tech to expand that into fully viable synthethic bodies for them.

# ? Mar 29, 2023 07:32

Tree Bucket: Apr 1, 2016; R.I.P.idura leucophrys

I want to know why the yeerk-box is lavender-coloured. Is it the Andalite version of danger red? Or toxic black and yellow? Or prison colours?

# ? Mar 29, 2023 07:38

Comrade Blyatlov: Aug 4, 2007; should have picked four fingers

Avalerion posted:

Having a trial for all this just seems super weird. Would an alien even be subject to earth/human laws?

Probably falls under the same as an invader being subject to the laws of the invaded nation, I guess. Idk. It's all made up but effective.

# ? Mar 29, 2023 07:43

Vandar: Sep 14, 2007; Isn't That Right, Chairman?

Imagine being one of Visser One's lawyers.

Imagine having to find some way to defend him.

# ? Mar 29, 2023 09:00

kiminewt: Feb 1, 2022

The comments earlier about freed hosts having morphing powers made me think about what an absolute cluster gently caress that would be.

You can abuse the morphing power in many hard-to-detect ways, chiefly morphing small things and other humans.

A soldier or terrorist might acquire someone of a similiar build and just go back and forth between morphing and demorphing every time they got injured.

Old people could acquire younger people and turn nothlit (even with consent. Would you let your grandparent turn into a nothlit you?).

How can you justify not giving the morphing power to someone who is critically injured? The andalites should just make a nerfed form that only restores you from your own DNA.

# ? Mar 29, 2023 11:39

mind the walrus: Sep 22, 2006

Vandar posted:

Imagine being one of Visser One's lawyers.

Imagine having to find some way to defend him.

I've a lot of intimate experience with defense attorneys for better and for worse, and to their credit they really are more about ensuring that due process gets carried out over any sort-of moralizing. It is, in-fact, very necessary and important to make sure that legal bodies don't get sloppy and start to railroad every single "oh come out it's so obvious!" case because eventually those precedents will be used to both harm innocent people and as a way to neutralize political opponents.

For a case like Visser One, yes it's ceremonial, and that kind-of takes the pressure off. All you have to do is be professional, do your job, and now your CV has a celebrity case like no other attached to it. You'll get speaking gigs at Law Schools for the rest of your life.

And to defend? That's up to personal interpretation. I'd go with the angle that Visser One was acting in accordance within Yeerk military norms and then when rightfully confronted with the overwhelming evidence that he was a sociopath-- that Yeerk culture fosters an ethos fundamentally at conflict with other species' ethical norms, and thus needs to be given special consideration when processed via any sentencing.

Other Yeerks would point out that Visser One sucked even by their norms, which seems like a gotcha but would only increase the argument for what is essentially an insanity plea.

I'm sure someone will say "but no a defense attorney is supposed to make sure their client is found not guilty!" and I certainly don't know the interiors of Law, but my understanding was always-- "lol no they don't they just have to make sure their client isn't getting hosed by a bully prosecution or judge."

# ? Mar 29, 2023 12:06

Avalerion: Oct 19, 2012

If it was to be a legit trial and not pretty much just some PR show one could argue... it would be impossible to get an impartial jury and judge since pretty much all of humanity was on the Visser's chopping block.

# ? Mar 29, 2023 12:24

Capfalcon: Apr 6, 2012; No Boots on the Ground,
Puny Mortals!

There is something oddly poetic about Visser One being the last Yeerk in the Yeerks empire, since everyone else morphed and stayed morphed.

# ? Mar 29, 2023 12:45

feetnotes: Jan 29, 2008

That�s true of the Yeerks that were in the immediate Earth area, yes. Those that went nothlit have probably done so by now, and within one generation will all be gone, just like the Taxxons.

How much of the Yeerk population is that, though? (Not counting those presumably still blockaded on the homeworld.) Were the Council of Thirteen and the Emperor personally on board that Earth pool ship? Or do they live to invade other species?

# ? Mar 29, 2023 13:14

disaster pastor: May 1, 2007

mind the walrus posted:

I've a lot of intimate experience with defense attorneys for better and for worse, and to their credit they really are more about ensuring that due process gets carried out over any sort-of moralizing. It is, in-fact, very necessary and important to make sure that legal bodies don't get sloppy and start to railroad every single "oh come out it's so obvious!" case because eventually those precedents will be used to both harm innocent people and as a way to neutralize political opponents.

I'm far from the first one to point this out, but it goes to show just how strong copaganda has been for decades that popular depictions of the police in media are "courageous defenders of the law" and popular depictions of defense attorneys are "devious scumbags who use technicalities to ensure the worst criminals avoid the punishments they deserve."

# ? Mar 29, 2023 13:31

Adbot: ADBOT LOVES YOU

# ? May 28, 2024 11:02

Ravenfood: Nov 4, 2011

feetnotes posted:

That’s true of the Yeerks that were in the immediate Earth area, yes. Those that went nothlit have probably done so by now, and within one generation will all be gone, just like the Taxxons.

How much of the Yeerk population is that, though? (Not counting those presumably still blockaded on the homeworld.) Were the Council of Thirteen and the Emperor personally on board that Earth pool ship? Or do they live to invade other species?

They live to invade othrt species. The Council of Thirteen was not in orbit.

And I know why the yeerks and taxxons were forced to nothlit themselves but it does feel weird.

# ? Mar 29, 2023 13:59

The Something Awful Forums > Archives > Comedy Goldmine > Let's Read Animorphs! The Whole Series! Ch-ch-ch-chaaanges

«‹›236 »