haveblue posted:

Well he can't put it in the refrigerator, that would defeat the whole purpose

rotinaj posted:

Don’t people making sourdough starter keep their actively alive mass of yeast and bacteria in their fridges?

Hiding it under the bed is where it goes from an extremely questionable experiment to a sign of mental illness, IMO

quote:

My high school is hosting these kids from Austria for two weeks after some of our students went through Austin in the fall and went to their school. I could have gone because I’m really good with languages but I’m choosing to study Japanese on my own time because I’m going to Tohoku university to double major in world economics and physics.

When I was talking to this one girl from I asked her to say something in German. She said something and I was like how does it feel to speak German and she said that in her part of Austin and in her family they say they speak Austrian. I was like no you speak German. She said that a good way to think of it where she is from it’s like a dialect of German called Austrian. I was like well now you’re showing not only do you have no idea what to call your own language, I need to explain to you what dialect actually means. She said she just came to see America and doesn’t want to really have these types of discussions. I said well accuracy is important and now it seems like she’s hiding something and I asked her point blank if she comes from N@zis. My teacher then stepped in and actually called me a “know it all rear end in a top hat.” I was like you can’t talk to me like that so he asked if I wanted to tell the vice principal for discipline that I called an exchange student a N@zi and I said I’m happy to defend myself but I have to study for AP tests. He said to keep it quiet for the rest of study period.

I went home to tell my mom what he said and she said “good you sound like a know it all rear end in a top hat.”

So I am right on every technical definition of the German language and what it means to have a dialect. But was I really being an rear end in a top hat to her?

rotinaj posted:

Don’t people making sourdough starter keep their actively alive mass of yeast and bacteria in their fridges?

Hiding it under the bed is where it goes from an extremely questionable experiment to a sign of mental illness, IMO

Kit Walker posted:

I've been on the other end of this. It sucks! Hell I've had a few occasions where I spent so long waiting I just went to bed

Kurieg posted:

He says in the comments that he could, in theory, just eat the expense and buy a new one, but it was his primary means of getting to work. He's also not sure if he trusts his family to actually follow through on any payment plan he gives them.

Chef Boyardeez Nuts posted:

Hell yeah. My number 1 fear as a parent is somehow loving up and raising a bigot.

MK-Ultramarathon posted:

AITA for explaining to an Austrian exchange student that she speaks German and there is no such thing as “Austrian”?

FMguru posted:

Another father of the year, here.

AITA for removing my daughters from my health insurance plan?

I had an affair, blew up my family, traded in my wife for a twenty year younger model, didn't fight for custody, moved to another state, and basically abandoned my 10 and 13 year old daughters, and for some reason they hold a grudge against me and not their mom - whose unspecified very severe mental illness was the root cause of all the family problem (and not my wandering dick) and yet somehow not severe enough to keep her for getting full custody of the children. I threw my daughters off my medical plan and now they won't talk to me or let me be involved in their lives, how is that fair?

quote:

This post violates Rule 7: No Interpersonal Conflict.

- Posts should be descriptions of recent interpersonal conflicts.

8one6 posted:

I saw something in the grocery store today that instantly reminded me of this thread.

kdrudy posted:

Went to go check this one out to see the justifications I was sure were being made in the comments by this dude, but the brain genius mods at AITA deleted it because:

quote:

I definitely do not want this. What I want is a relationship with my daughters but it seemed to me prior to the insurance situation that a relationship is not in the cards. So I figured, why should I be expected to provide something for people who don’t want anything to do with me?

quote:

Throw away account for obvious reasons.

You’ve posted several times in this sub complaining that I don’t gently caress you enough. You post that I shrink away from your touch and you just DoNt KnOw WhAt To Do AnYmOrE?

Instead of complaining to internet strangers and making me seem like a frigid bitch who “might have some childhood trauma regarding sex”, (which isn’t even true??? What is wrong with you?!) maybe you should try looking inward.

Do you think it’s maybe because you refuse to help me clean? Do you think it’s maybe because of the fact that whenever I ask for your help you tell me “well you do it better than me” or “maybe later”? Or the fact that at least once a month you yell at me for not making the food correctly? Do you think it’s due to the fact that you never once woke up at night for the babies and would yell at me when one of them woke you up crying? Or because of the fact that across 3 kids you’ve changed MAYBE 5 diapers total? Do you think it’s because you refuse to spend any time at all with me and the kids? I can’t even remember the last time you took me on a date night. I stopped asking 2 years ago when you didn’t even get me a card for my birthday. YOU actually woke ME up on my birthday to yell at me that our son had thrown up all over his bed and I didn’t clean it? IF YOU WERE AWAKE AND I WASNT MAYBE JUST DO IT YOURSELF??!!! Do you think it’s because the only time you try to gently caress me is after I’m already asleep? Do you think it’s because of the fact that over the last 3 years you haven’t even TRIED to make me cum? Or that you threw away my vibrator because I “shouldn’t have anything except my husband inside of me”? Or maybe because you keep asking me for certain sex acts you know make me extremely uncomfortable? Do you think maybe it’s the fact that after the last 3 times we had sex you’ve made rude comments about my “extra flab” and stretch marks? Or maybe was it the time that I bought lingerie and you laughed and said I should’ve gotten a larger size? Or maybe last year for Christmas when I said it would be fun to go to a cabin in the snow just us for my birthday you instead got me personal training sessions and told me “this will help with my attraction”? Do you think it’s because of the fact you constantly talk about how hot your new coworker is? Or the fact that you go to a strip club almost ever Friday after work instead of spending time with your wives and kids?

Please explain to me why I would WANT to have sex with you. WHY. When the only times we do have sex it lasts 3 minutes and afterwards you just roll over and tell me to get myself off. HOW CAN I WHEN YOU THROW AWAY MY VIBRATORS?!

Maybe instead of coming to Reddit and making me seem like the bad guy, FIX YOURSELF FIRST. gently caress YOU. Words don’t describe the contempt I feel for you after finding your multiple posts across different subs about how I hate sex and am “possibly asexual”. I love sex. I used to have good sex. I miss it. I don’t miss you anymore. I hope you loving read this.

Don’t believe everything you read here people. There’s always another side. And to all the men complaining here that their wives don’t gently caress them enough, maybe stop to consider the fact that YOU might be the issue.

Rant over.

Edit: a few people have messaged me about the cleaning portion of this post. We both work full time jobs so it’s not like I’m home all day and should be taking care of it.

quote:

He read the post. He disagreed with everything I said and we have been living apart since he screen shot my post and asked if it was about him.

The gust of it is that He thinks that I don’t put enough effort into being physically attractive to him so in his mind it’s okay to not put effort into sex and want to cheat. “Men are visual creatures.” He thinks that he should be able to experience everything he wants sexually even if I don’t want it because I’m his wife and it’s my obligation to keep him happy. That was shocking to hear. This is not the man I married.

We are going through with divorce and I couldn’t be happier. My life is infinitely easier without him in it.

Sorry if this is anti-climatic, I don’t really have the energy to type out everything that happened. Maybe I will someday. I’m currently getting ready for a custody battle because he said he would get full custody and never let me see the kids.

I truly didn’t think my post would get as much attention as it did, I wrote it out of anger.

Thank you to everyone who commented and reached out privately. You gave me the confidence to go through with the divorce.

quote:

Sorry if this is not a great update.

We divorced. He gets the kids weekends only which has left me with a lot of free time. I have been going on dates and met a lovely man who is incredible in bed. I feel so sexy again.

My ex has asked to reconcile a few times and I heard through the grapevine of mutual friends that he has been complaining about single life. Lol.

Just wanted to say life gets better. This will probably be my last update on the matter. Hope you all are well and thank you again for all the kind words and support while I was at my lowest.

MK-Ultramarathon posted:

AITA for explaining to an Austrian exchange student that she speaks German and there is no such thing as “Austrian”?

Love the fact that OP, refusing to believe someone knows what to call their own language, immediately makes an even dumber leap and assumes the only reason someone might be specific about their dialect is because their relatives were Nazis.

quote:

I do not play, watch or talk about team sports.

quote:

I practice Shinto so yes, I revere the culture of my spiritual ancestors.

quote:

YTA and I'm getting strong incel vibes from you OP. You've got to have a wild lack of respect for the person you're talking to in order to come with this line of bullshit.

quote:

Well actually I was hoping to strike up a more romantic conversation with her so one could say I held her in the utmost regard

deported to Canada posted:

That kid sounds insufferable. I remember the first time I went snowboarding in Austria and I went with a bunch of German speakers. Our group organiser was talking with the lady who owned the villa we were staying in and the two of them really struggled to understand each other. I asked how it was different at the time and it was described to me as imagine being English, speaking English and then talking to a Glaswegian - yes it's the same language but the accent and syntax is different so it can be difficult to understand.

The Bramble posted:

Husband has been micro-dosing me with expired food

quote:

My brother (39m) has a daughter Piper (15f). When Piper was 4 her mom died. My brother told Piper so much about her and they had some special photos of her mom that were treasured. When Piper was 6 she started being teased by this girl call Nancy (15f now). It continued on for over a year and ultimately came to a head when Nancy tore up a photo of Piper's mom that Piper brought into school for some show and tell family edition her class was doing. From that day on Piper did not like Nancy. Because of that incident my brother and Nancy's mom met. They became friends and a few months after the incident where Nancy tore up the photo, they started dating and they married a year later. Piper pulled away from my brother when she found out he was dating Nancy's mom and even more when they moved in together and got married.

Nancy was actually happy and tried to get close to Piper. But Piper wanted nothing to do with that. Nancy's mom mentioned how being sisters would mend the rift and I thought that was kind of crazy given what went down.

My brother only mentioned to me recently that he really thought Piper and Nancy would be sisters and would be close by now. But Piper doesn't want anything to do with Nancy still and doesn't trust her around anything important.

I told my brother that's because he moved too fast to get that kind of relationship with them. I said he and his wife started dating and Nancy hadn't even apologized and then Piper was still upset about who he was dating and Nancy being in her life more when they got married. I told him at no point did he try to make what happened better for Piper. He thought his marriage license would somehow erase the hurt Piper felt and the bullying Nancy put Piper through for more than a year. I said MAYBE if he had given it time, let Nancy apologize and given the girls space where they weren't living together to interact outside of school, things could have happened. But you had one child who was hurt and angry and another who was eager to have a dad and sibling after only having her mom.

My brother said I expected him to let Piper dictate his life. I said no, not what I said, I said if he wanted Piper to be happy and embrace Nancy as a sibling, then he should have taken things more slowly, to get that outcome. He told me it was none of my business and I was overstepping and just his little sister.

AITA?

Moon Slayer posted:

Letter to my husband. I hope you read this from r/DeadBedrooms

3 weeks later...

1 year later ...

Fatty posted:

Wasn't it a thing that they didn't let Schwarzenegger do the German dub of Terminator because his Austrian accent meant that he sounded like a hillbilly to Germans?

The_Franz posted:

Wait until this smarmy poo poo nerdlinger gets to Japan and starts telling native speakers that they're speaking their own language incorrectly because they're speaking their own dialect. People like the OP are the kind of people who get sucker-punched by the real world.

Admiral Joeslop posted:

I bet he has Opinions about "y'all."

quote:

I (23M) am dating my boyfriend (19M) for an year and he struggles a bit in social settings and can come off as rude sometimes. My sister (27F) has had a cat ever since she moved out (our parents didn't allow pets) who has now unfortunately passed away. My sister came to visit me a couple of days ago and kept talking about how much she's grieving her cat and even now she's still crying at nights over it. My bf overheard and told her "Isn't it kind of embarrassing for an adult to cry over a cat ? Just get another one". My sister didn't take it well and started berating him and raising her voice at him (he also struggles with people yelling cause of his abusive dad) and at some point called him soulless, to which my bf replied that he's at least not a dumb woman like her. I tried to calm things down as much as I could, but the damage was already done and my sister left in tears. I tried to lecture my bf about what he said, but he didn't seem like he was listening to me, so I just gave up.

I thought we'd smooth things over later once my sister calms down, but I just found that she banned my boyfriend from the upcoming Easter party she's gonna host and said that if I try to bring him regardless she'll cut me off from her life too. I said that she's overreacting and she knows my boyfriend is a bit stand-offish but doesn't mean any harm and I could make him apologize for what he said to her, but she said she's had enough of that jerk insulting her and everyone from our family and she knows he never means any of his half assed apologies and only tells them for my sake. She told me that I can spend time with my family or keep being that rear end in a top hat's personal public defender and then hung up, which I think was uncalled for. My bf does sometimes say things that can come across as rude, but he doesn't mean them and my family was being understanding, but it seems like now that went out of the window now with my sister. I know I defend my bf a lot, but I feel nobody understands him like I do, tho I might've come across as an enabler of his bad behavior to a couple of people.

AITA ?

FMguru posted:

Today's theme is: lovely dads. First that guy with the health insurance, and now this winner.

AITA for telling my brother he moved too fast for the outcome he ultimately wanted?

Brother: Why does my daughter not like her stepsister
Sister: Because you moved too fast and pushed them together, it's no surprise she never bonded with her bully
Brother: Step off, that's none of your business.

Put my six year old daughter's needs ahead of my own? What are you, crazy?

Oh lord, what a nightmare for that kid. You get bullied in school, and your Dad's response is to marry your bully's mom and move the bully into your house.

mllaneza posted:

I use y'all because my German teacher in high school pointed out that it's the English language's only second-person plural pronoun.

quote:

quote:

I manage a team of eight. We have all been with this company for over 10 years and together in this department for about five. Recently our company merged with another and now my department is over twice the size. The new company hired a manager, Tim, to work with me who is completely new, not a part of either previous company.

One of my direct reports, Vanessa, is an issue between me and Tim. Vanessa is quirky. When I first started managing her, she cried a few times at any feedback. After a long conversation, she told me she is an empath and cries a lot, but just ignore it and she will be fine. This has proved to mostly be true. Vanessa cries in meetings, at her desk, and during team lunches, and we adapted.

In the first week Tim was on board, two incidents with Vanessa occurred. The first was Vanessa cried throughout a meeting explaining the merger. My team simply let her be, but it was clear Tim was distracted. A few days later, a bunch of us were in a conference room and a bird flew into the glass window, fell the the ground, and died. One of my team members stalled Vanessa in the hallway while another ran outside and moved the bird to the garbage with a shovel.

After the bird incident, Tim scheduled a meeting with me to discuss Vanessa. First he asked me if she had a specific diagnosis or any ADA accommodations, which she does not. Second, he told me that he thinks long-standing teams can be dysfunctional and not realize it because we are so used to working around it.

Then Tim told me Vanessa’s conduct is “below baseline professional.” Tim is concerned that Vanessa has come to expect emotional support at work beyond average and the 10 new people who join our department will not satisfy her, ending in disaster for all.

Tim thinks we need to have a meeting right away with Vanessa and lay out some things that she needs to change. What concerns me about this is how Tim wants to have this meeting, which is a “tough love” format and will definitely not get through to Vanessa. I suggested a much softer approach and Tim told me, “Can you see that you can’t talk to Vanessa like an adult?”

I think Vanessa is definitely an adult. I also think we should deal with personality conflicts when they come, if they come. I think there is a real benefit to accepting the misfits, the quirky, the sensitive among us.

Tim and I agreed to table it for now, but he told me that he is prepared to talk to Vanessa about professional conduct and will not hesitate to do so if the situation warrants it.

I want our new department to be successful and I want to work well with Tim. I also want Vanessa to keep being Vanessa. How do you suggest I go forward in this situation?

Well … I share Tim’s concerns.

He might be off-base about the most effective way to approach Vanessa about this; I’d say the focus shouldn’t be on “tough love” but on brainstorming practical solutions with her, like leaving the room if she needs to cry, a private work space if that’s feasible, a leave of absence if it’s needed, an EAP if you have one. But he’s right about the main point: Having someone regularly cry “in meetings, at her desk, and during team lunches” would be disruptive and upsetting for most people.

It’s possible that all your long-time team members are used to it and happy to work around it … but I wouldn’t be surprised if at least some of them are really uncomfortable but think they have no choice but to accept it. And either way, it’s highly likely that the new employees joining your team won’t be comfortable having a colleague regularly crying in shared spaces.

Crying is a sign of distress, and a lot of people find it difficult to ignore that! Your new employees might have trouble focusing on their work when Vanessa is crying or might feel deep discomfort not acknowledging she’s distraught, and are likely to find it really upsetting themselves.

Vanessa is explaining this by saying she’s an empath … but what about others who also feel empathy for those around them and are being asked to work around someone who is so frequently venting intense feelings of sadness? Vanessa isn’t the only one whose feelings matter, and it’s not reasonable — or frankly kind — to ask people to accommodate this in their work space so frequently. You’re prioritizing Vanessa’s mental health and emotional needs at the expense of everyone else’s.

To be clear, this isn’t an across-the-board condemnation of tears at work. We are human and humans have emotional reactions. Sometimes that can mean tears. What’s disruptive here is the frequency.

I applaud that you want to make space for “the misfits, the quirky, the sensitive among us.” Workplaces often don’t do that enough, and some of the expectations we have around “professionalism” aren’t really necessary (and some are nothing more than sexism, racism, and/or ableism). But some of what professionalism encompasses are the things that make it possible for groups of people to work together smoothly and productively and reasonably pleasantly, like not regularly subjecting others to disruptive or emotionally draining behavior.

I can’t tell if Tim is your peer or if he’s senior to you. If he’s senior to you, this may not be your call anyway — but if he’s not, I hope you’ll listen to the perspective he offered you. He nailed it when he said that teams that have worked together for a long time sometimes don’t recognize dysfunction because they’ve all grown so accustomed to navigating around it.

mllaneza posted:

I use y'all because my German teacher in high school pointed out that it's the English language's only second-person plural pronoun.

FMguru posted:

Today's theme is: lovely dads. First that guy with the health insurance, and now this winner.

AITA for telling my brother he moved too fast for the outcome he ultimately wanted?

Brother: Why does my daughter not like her stepsister
Sister: Because you moved too fast and pushed them together, it's no surprise she never bonded with her bully
Brother: Step off, that's none of your business.

Put my six year old daughter's needs ahead of my own? What are you, crazy?

Oh lord, what a nightmare for that kid. You get bullied in school, and your Dad's response is to marry your bully's mom and move the bully into your house.

trickybiscuits posted:

FMguru posted:

Today's theme is: lovely dads. First that guy with the health insurance, and now this winner.

AITA for telling my brother he moved too fast for the outcome he ultimately wanted?

Brother: Why does my daughter not like her stepsister
Sister: Because you moved too fast and pushed them together, it's no surprise she never bonded with her bully
Brother: Step off, that's none of your business.

Put my six year old daughter's needs ahead of my own? What are you, crazy?

Oh lord, what a nightmare for that kid. You get bullied in school, and your Dad's response is to marry your bully's mom and move the bully into your house.

mllaneza posted:

I use y'all because my German teacher in high school pointed out that it's the English language's only second-person plural pronoun.

FMguru posted:

Today's theme is: lovely dads. First that guy with the health insurance, and now this winner.

AITA for telling my brother he moved too fast for the outcome he ultimately wanted?

Brother: Why does my daughter not like her stepsister
Sister: Because you moved too fast and pushed them together, it's no surprise she never bonded with her bully
Brother: Step off, that's none of your business.

Put my six year old daughter's needs ahead of my own? What are you, crazy?

Oh lord, what a nightmare for that kid. You get bullied in school, and your Dad's response is to marry your bully's mom and move the bully into your house.

Pookah posted:

"Ye" is still commonly used in Ireland

Pookah posted:

"Ye" is still commonly used in Ireland

sullat posted:

Is it mostly in the context of asking black and tans to come out for a fight, or is it more widespread?

Irisi posted:

And "youse" in Scotland. As in "What are all youse doing tonight then? Fancy a pint?". It's a perfectly sensible, understandable slang term, and seems to be spreading, it used to be purely Glaswegian, but I've heard it more and more in other areas.

quote:

I’m not going into a for profit tech industry, I am going to work with my economics degree to institute world non-revolutionary communism and I’m going to work at CERN with my physics phd

sullat posted:

Is it mostly in the context of asking black and tans to come out for a fight, or is it more widespread?

The_Franz posted:

"Hey baby, Austrian huh? How about that Hitler, eh?"

Moon Slayer posted:

A blast from the past, circa May 2020.

My (19f) SO (22f) has been ignoring quarantine to attend orgies.

2 days later ...

quote:

 I said going to one of her counselling meetings might be a start

The_Franz posted:

Ok, the self-proclaimed language police kid is either trolling, or is actually the cringiest, most naive, most self-unaware person on the planet:

lol CERN, just wait until this kid starts lecturing the locals about Schweizerdeutsch. They're going to throw him into the LHC head-first.