(Thread IKs:
Josherino)
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Ice Phisherman posted:gently caress man, I'm so sorry. It was super sudden and weird. I regret that we were in a bitter fight at the time but a month of us being dickheads doesn't void 40 years of being bros.
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May 6, 2023 09:10
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Get therapy if you can. Seriously. This is a ton to deal with.
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May 6, 2023 09:13
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they revive a dead man so that he can die...properly? Medical science is hosed up Sorry for your loss buddy. As you say, the recent fighting was just a temporary blip on your overall relationship
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May 6, 2023 16:31
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what can you do if, whenever you lay down to rest, you get *hammered* by incoherent, intrusive thoughts that feel like someone is screaming pure poo poo directly into your mind? it's been going on a while but man it's hard to overstate how bad it is. happens every night waking up/falling asleep and every time i take a nap hoping it's just a stress byproduct of city noise/being homeless and it'll go away one day
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May 6, 2023 17:52
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You're without permanent housing? If so, do you know what sort of support you might find helpful?
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May 6, 2023 18:28
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Segata Sanshiro posted:what can you do if, whenever you lay down to rest, you get *hammered* by incoherent, intrusive thoughts that feel like someone is screaming pure poo poo directly into your mind? it's been going on a while but man it's hard to overstate how bad it is. happens every night waking up/falling asleep and every time i take a nap Do you have anyone you can talk to either irl or via phone to just get it out there? One thing that helped me was just having someone recognize the problems I was having and talk through them, it helps with the sense of isolation. It's definitely a result of stress- I can tell you the bad news is that it won't immediately go away when you're more secure, but the good news is that it does eventually decline.
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May 6, 2023 18:54
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yeah i've been unsheltered since 2021 bc covid blew my life up basically. if you think you can help in some way you can pm me but there's otherwise not a lot others can do, i'm still kind of in waiting until i get my id/docs back. even after that i'm gonna have to bootstraps everything which is a motivation killer in itself :negativeman: i don't have anyone to really talk to irl in this town but listening to music/talking to online friends does help, good to know at least that it can decline
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May 6, 2023 19:23
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I don't do social work professionally but I know a little about systems in certain places, as I'm sure you do as well, but if u wanted to talk about that or anything else here or in my thread about being happy, I will try to do only good posts
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May 6, 2023 19:46
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Segata Sanshiro posted:what can you do if, whenever you lay down to rest, you get *hammered* by incoherent, intrusive thoughts that feel like someone is screaming pure poo poo directly into your mind? it's been going on a while but man it's hard to overstate how bad it is. happens every night waking up/falling asleep and every time i take a nap ime it's stress and it works the same way for physical pain. you can build up a tolerance but it's an active one that turns off as you start to get relaxed for sleep, which means you get lovely sleep which makes it worse & c you have 'alarms' and you're getting really good at ignoring them, which is strength in a way, but you can get too good at that. your brain is sending you 1000 unread messages and it's going to keep sending more messages about your unread messages it absolutely can go away by 1) changing conditions. which doesn't help right now of course but it's not a permanent thing 2) taking some time to process that isn't ignoring. this can be really hard but this is meditation or cbt or prayer or whatever, trying to deal even a little with the stress while your shields would normally be up. you lower them, and pick through the alarms, not berating yourself, but just looking at them with an analytic minds eye
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May 6, 2023 21:21
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yeah from what little research I did it seems to arise from constant stress and that tracks with it starting during quarantine, when things were getting bad but before I lost housing obviously it's worse now but knowing that others know what I'm talking about and that I'm right about it decreasing with stress is a relief
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May 6, 2023 22:43
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MLK Ultra posted:my dad died and i had to watch him have 200+ seizures because after 40 minutes without o2 and six dfibs they got a rhythm on him, drove him to Critical, Critical to palliative where we gave him 1mg of dilaudid a .5h. gently caress man, sorry to hear.
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May 7, 2023 00:16
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Segata Sanshiro posted:yeah i've been unsheltered since 2021 bc covid blew my life up basically. if you think you can help in some way you can pm me but there's otherwise not a lot others can do, i'm still kind of in waiting until i get my id/docs back. even after that i'm gonna have to bootstraps everything which is a motivation killer in itself :negativeman: Have you checked out the goonfund thread?
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May 7, 2023 00:19
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I'm venting my dad dad stuff here. I'm glad I edited that previous post because it was... /way/ descriptive. The tl;dr was that it was pretty awful watching the smartest guy I know, in terms of dads, seize out over and over when I just expected a tube. So, we're a small family unit. Only child; mom; uncle (dad's brother, older). And I'm just working on getting my mom to eat the food we're bringing over / to sleep. We're six minutes down the road so the Real Goal here is to get her to a point where she can hang out at our house with their Golden. No one has a Healthy time -- like, she's telling me things like "Oh I opened the fridge and was like 'that's the last sweet tea your dad made'" -- and she keeps going over how awful a time it was at the hospital over and over. And how she thinks she killed him. And how the dog is acting angry because the dog knows she killed him. Today she was like, "And I was talking to (my friend) and I heard this huge thump upstairs in the bathroom (where he died) and I went up there and all the stuff on the shelves was in the tub. What does that mean, MLK?? What does that??" She didn't laugh when I said, "Gravity." Instead it's the ghost of my dad, angry she killed him. My uncle then, out of nowhere, says he's coming up. My parents are Stuff hoarders and right now I'm working on "Let's get mom to eat / sleep." He refuses to stay at a hotel because he doesn't want to be alone when he... really wasn't a part of our lives past the occasional phonecall every month or two. So now mom is cleaning the kitchen instead of sleeping or eating. Said he could stay here (again, like 6m away) -- and I guess he's doing that but he's stopping at various friends' places on the way up so no one can tell me when he'll be here and he isn't answering the phone presumably because I sound too much like his brother. Like. I wasn't a great son. No one is. People are human. Pulled up pretty hard in my 20s and 30s. But I really have been trying to step up helping out so mom, a person talking to invisible folks and waiting for falling objects in a bathroom to indicate disdain, doesn't have to deal with an overwhelming amount of things when she started dating my dad at 16, has never lived alone, and was with him for 47 years. She refused to go to the funeral home and I already knew when I brought the papers to sign for transfer and cremation that she'd be emotional about it because: That means she's admitting he's dead. She forgot to give us a check so we just paid the 2k for it. Like, gently caress it. Money isn't a thing right now -- we need those Certificates to deal with a lot of the other parts of this whole. I don't know. It's super irritating because we're bringing food over and she's like "I had a slice of ham and a piece of bread." gently caress. If Suffering for the Sake of Suffering Because ... I Forget Why We Do This were a crest on a flag, it'd be on our name's crest. Mom's like, "Oh and your uncle is bringing up a chainsaw so he can deal with this tree" or some poo poo and -- I guess I lost it there. Called him up. And I guess I'm going to be the rear end in a top hat now because I pretty clearly stated -- without being too mean because... again, dad had three relatives. He's one of 'em: - Not knowing when you're going to be here is really messed up because we're the ones making a space for you since you won't stay at a hotel. - My mother and I have been with him for the last 40 years and we need time to mourn. - It isn't like we're doing a wake. We aren't. Your brother is currently in a fridge at the hospital and we won't have remains for what's probably a week or two. - No one needs you here and it feels like you're interjecting yourself into this situation but in a really rude way where ... If it were an emergency to console my mother, why are you visiting friends on the way up? Not my job to tell you how to mourn but... it's not your job to come here. - You said you're coming up here to "Help move out (my dad's) stuff" -- one, his computers are still on and logged in so I need those up. Two, her words not mine: I don't want to go through his shirts right now. And it isn't your job to make her do that. Or to force her to. - So (paraphrased:) go the gently caress back home. It loving sucks because me, the dipshit fuckup, is having to be an adult and my partner (god bless them) is like, "MLK. For real. You're doing... I'm so loving proud of you." But it's hard and it sucks my entire rear end because I was making some progress with my mom. Slowly. It's going to take forever because she keeps rehashing this poo poo over and over in the most unhelpful ways possible (see, again: Head & Shoulders Ouija) and she's never been alone -- but like. I don't know. It sucks to have to be the rear end in a top hat because I'm not trying to tell him how to mourn but dropping everything and saying that "I have to be with my family!" when he's literally not really shown interest in our lives is ... so absolutely selfish. Anyhow. I either made it Real Weird when he gets here or maybe he'll listen because I sound like his brother. Probably the first one. Thanks for listening to me vent. I'm not even looking for solutions: I just... this is frustrating and neither of them have asked me how I'm doing. She asked when her THCA vape would be here and that the last time she had Gilato (as a desert) she didn't like it. And my uncle isn't answering his phone at 8:30p so. loving frustrating. Thanks for coming to my In Medias Res.
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May 7, 2023 01:57
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MLK Ultra posted:I'm venting my dad dad stuff here. I'm glad I edited that previous post because it was... /way/ descriptive. how your mom is handling it sounds (mostly) normal, honestly. in fact, a lot of that is super relatable as someone who's lost a partner. took me weeks to throw out something he last ate in the fridge, for instance. but that's ok, and it's totally ok for your mom to think of those things, or think things are "signs" or what have you, within reason (the guilt stuff is another thing, but that can be worked on in time). same goes for you, too. she'll grieve differently than you and at her own pace. you're clearly doing a good job taking care of her, and I'm sorry that your needs are being neglected. I'd suggest doing more self care and taking stock of your own grieving right now. your mom will survive even if she's only eating a piece of ham and bread in a day. most people don't eat much, or stop eating completely, for a while. she'll probably lose a bunch of weight, which is also typical. and it sounds like your relatives are very annoying and I'm sorry you have to run interference. consider that sometimes people prefer to stay busy after a trauma like this. that might be the impetus for your mom wanting that tree to come down, or whatever other thing around the house. I'm sorry you're going through this. I bet your mom is really grateful you're here for her.
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May 7, 2023 02:41
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Condolences, grief is weird, taking time to be weird with it for a while is fine. Echoing Crusty Nutsack, make sure your own needs are being met, put on your own oxygen mask before assisting others because you are also going through a thing, which is fine. When I went through a similar situation I became emotionally numb for a while, then alternated between numbness and extreme volatility. Have you heard the analogy of the box with a ball in it? The box has a button on the inside, and the ball is constantly bouncing off the walls. When the ball hits the button, you experience all the feelings that go with grief. Immediately after you lose the person, the ball is huge, so the ball is hitting the button constantly as it bounces around, but over time the ball grows smaller and it hits less and less. When it hits, the feeling is just as strong, but it hits less often. I found that to be, if not actionably helpful, at least an accurate metaphor for how processing grief over time goes.
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May 7, 2023 05:09
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apologies for this but idk where else to vent about it right now since i don't have a therapist appt for a while but really just need to get it out, but this whole recent thing with how homelessness is treated in light of the recent murder and poo poo just has me in an absolute spiral i know its been this way forever, with plenty of documented evidence and stuff going around of cops beating the poo poo out of the homeless for no reason, the societal and systemic double whammy making it almost impossible to escape, and all that, and hell, i've been on my fair share of the receiving end of it during my time on the street and such. but even so, the recent events have really just done a number on me in terms of like, even if i somehow manage to win the lottery with getting on disability, and can focus all my time on digging my way out of the pit of borderline comatose depression, what next? is there even any hope of escaping at this point? everything can be taken away by one rear end in a top hat having a bad day, and when it happens, people all but cheer and defend the person in question for getting rid of a useless, noncontributory, unwanted element. meanwhile the struggle to get even a foot in the door for basic safety net stuff seems insurmountable, fighting an endless uphill battle of waiting for forms, filling out approvals, waiting on hold for hours upon hours, denials, reapplications, means testing, examinations, etc etc. and every piece of advice is either just 'have you tried thinking positively about it' as if that will make the filing go faster or more in my favor, bootstraps 'try harder, grindset' poo poo as if i'm not already putting everything i can into keeping my head abovewater as it is, or of course the classic 'you're just making it up to laze around'. there honestly doesn't seem to be an avenue of escape at this point, and recent stuff just makes it look even more fragile than ever
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May 8, 2023 00:48
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Story of my adult life as well. It loving sucks. I lucked out with still having parents who let me sleep under a roof, but getting everything else is a nightmare. Took two years to get free-ish medical treatment, three for brain meds. Goin on year 4 and counting of my disability case. These pieces of poo poo are trying to Socially Murder me!
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May 8, 2023 04:49
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this isn’t strictly mental health related, but I have been working really hard to get my drinking under control. I’ve been in naltrexone for a month or so and my doctor had me get another blood test since I guess it can rarely cause liver damage? anyways, my liver result numbers are wayyy better. one of them is within the normal range and the other is nearly cut in half. it’s so gratifying to see an actual result of the miserable process of cutting this poo poo out.
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May 8, 2023 05:28
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skooma512 posted:When you do get the gently caress out because you don't like it, there's a good chance they'll completely reverse their tone and try to get you to stay. It happened to me. Get the gently caress out of my house became oh please stay, stay and save money don't move out and pay rent. They use kicking you out as a trump card to control you and don't really have anywhere to escalate beyond that once their bluff is called. This. Back right before I severed, my dad was absolutely shocked that I believed him when he said I wouldn't be allowed back home after graduation. Like he threatened it but apparently he was fully expecting that I would just move back home anyway? And I'm like, in what world am I *not* supposed to believe you when you say something that serious? At that point I had enough independence and was on the other side of the state and severed anyway, even though it meant facing a possible month or two of living out of my car and (worse) giving up my two cats, because the thought of doing that was more bearable than being jerked around by one of the few people who's supposed to provide a safe place. I managed to find a job and sell enough things to make rent that month so thankfully me and the kitties were ok. Definitely the best and hardest decision I've ever had to make. I feel incredibly lucky even 15+ years later. MLK Ultra posted:It was super sudden and weird. There are times I'm glad I'll never have to know the loss of a parent like that. And other times that it makes my heart ache because I wish I had at least one great enough to grieve like that. I'm so sorry for your loss. Zantie has issued a correction as of 05:43 on May 8, 2023 |
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May 8, 2023 05:40
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Consummate Professional posted:this isn’t strictly mental health related, but I have been working really hard to get my drinking under control. I’ve been in naltrexone for a month or so and my doctor had me get another blood test since I guess it can rarely cause liver damage? standard to do liver panel before due to the black box warning, but the origin of that warning of liver damage is from a 1985 study with doses a few times higher than what is prescribed now (300 vs 50 mg?) and subsequent studies haven't really found liver damage. probably good to run liver panels for anyone who drinks though. https://aasldpubs.onlinelibrary.wiley.com/doi/10.1002/hep4.2080 this study is open access and mentions that original 1985 study and subsequent ones in the intro. it didn't find concerning liver metabolism in patients taking naltrexone with existing liver damage so it seems like the current prescribed dose is pretty much safe. I think it's just extremely difficult to get rid of an initial warning like that, especially for something that is going to be taken by people with liver damage or still drinking. also side note, it's insane how much damage acetaminophen and especially acetaminophen + alcohol can do. pretty sure acetaminophen is the leading cause of acute liver failure. not sure about chronic but... yeah. it's pretty gnarly for a prescribed drug in terms of potential liver damage, let alone OTC. tl;dr naltrexone probably doesn't cause liver damage at normal prescribed doses, but it gets liver panel checks for historical reasons.
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May 8, 2023 05:52
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interesting! I didn’t really expect worse results but I was very heartened to see better ones
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May 8, 2023 06:00
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Consummate Professional posted:interesting! I didn’t really expect worse results but I was very heartened to see better ones also yeah drinking sucks rear end. i somehow lucked out and went from heavy drinking through my 20s to not wanting or really being able to tolerate alcohol like a switch flipped. i still have visceral memories of how bad some hangovers or just general day to day poo poo felt from drinking. i have no idea how i lived like that naltrexone and the other one, acamprosate, have only been around for a couple decades and the randomized clinical trial designs are pretty poo poo for assessing maintenance medications like that, but the case studies of individuals taking them long term seem like they work long term if they worked in the first place. hell of a lot better than behavioral modification alone or that other drug that just makes hangovers several times worse.
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May 8, 2023 06:26
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I'm really saddened by all of the misinformation, or lack of information, about tinnitus both online and offline. I posted about my recent experiences in the COVID thread and how I've learned tons of useful tips and tricks to help with my recent spat of tinnitus, and I had four separate goons PM me saying they suffer from tinnitus and asked for advice as well. Most western PCPs will prescribe random poo poo to help with symptoms then refer folks to an ENT, who then run a hearing test and in the end say there's nothing they can do and they have to live with it, which is patently wrong. I joined a Facebook tinnitus support group and the number of people who are insanely depressed and have had their lives ruined is too many to count, with many drinking every night until they pass out as a means for relief. Then you get the ones who are so desperate that they delve into conspiratorial territory of blaming 5G, wi-fi and/or vaccines for their onset of tinnitus. It isn't easy but there are many options available to work through tinnitus though they take lots of effort and a lot of time to get to a place where you feel better. Many people aren't aware of the options and in turn their mental health absolutely craters to where they can't function in society; I read many stories of people who lost their jobs, their kids and their happiness because they were told there's nothing to be done. There is, but it's a long road.
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May 8, 2023 15:32
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I'm giving the therapist search another try. I contacted 8 who take my insurance and seem appropriate via Psychology Today. If they don't work out, maybe I'll try random therapists through local clinics again.
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May 8, 2023 22:17
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Louisgod posted:I'm really saddened by all of the misinformation, or lack of information, about tinnitus both online and offline. I posted about my recent experiences in the COVID thread and how I've learned tons of useful tips and tricks to help with my recent spat of tinnitus, and I had four separate goons PM me saying they suffer from tinnitus and asked for advice as well. Most western PCPs will prescribe random poo poo to help with symptoms then refer folks to an ENT, who then run a hearing test and in the end say there's nothing they can do and they have to live with it, which is patently wrong. I joined a Facebook tinnitus support group and the number of people who are insanely depressed and have had their lives ruined is too many to count, with many drinking every night until they pass out as a means for relief. Then you get the ones who are so desperate that they delve into conspiratorial territory of blaming 5G, wi-fi and/or vaccines for their onset of tinnitus. I have not had good results from ENTs, they always seem to look at whatever, shrug and say "nothing can be done". But my tinnitus never went through one of them, I was sent straight to a hearing clinic, they found I had mild hearing loss due to having lived so long, and suggested maybe I could consider hearing aids. Not sure if that would help with the constant ringing but at least I'm able to easily tune it out
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May 9, 2023 00:51
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Then again, my anxiety consult kind of went the same way as an ENT visit this time, since it is a program that only sees you for a single visit, then recommend a bunch of web sites you can go to to work on mindfulness and CBT. Which, fair, but I can google too and already had so
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May 9, 2023 00:53
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Bilirubin posted:I have not had good results from ENTs, they always seem to look at whatever, shrug and say "nothing can be done". But my tinnitus never went through one of them, I was sent straight to a hearing clinic, they found I had mild hearing loss due to having lived so long, and suggested maybe I could consider hearing aids. Not sure if that would help with the constant ringing but at least I'm able to easily tune it out really depends on the kind of tinnitus and hearing aid as to whether they will do anything but in theory they can mask it with different types of noise while still allowing you to hear normally/better (arguable). they can also help if you have contrast-based or sensitive tinnitus. basically some kinds of tinnitus can be alleviated by correcting hearing loss. some can be masked. some can't be. there's no single physical or psychological mechanism. iirc there are cases of tinnitus that is caused by something that is actually audible. e.g. https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC4922963/. quote:Tinnitus is defined as phantom auditory sensation without an acoustic generator. In certain instances there may well be an acoustic generator in the form of underlying pathology. Objective tinnitus is audible to an observer whereas subjective tinnitus is not. It can be treated and the experiences prove to be rewarding. Subjective tinnitus on the other hand can not be demonstrated and is difficult to treat. hearing loss tends to come along with or exacerbate existing tinnitus too. https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC2686891/ is a really good overview of various mechanisms. some tinnitus is caused by audio processing fuckups and disorders that tend to cause or be associated audio processing issues are also associated with tinnitus. e.g. adhd, asd. i don't think there is good clinical evidence but self-reports and anecdotally medication can sometimes resolve or lessen tinnitus. there are some reports/studies on how adhd medications can reduce/cause reported tinnitus (usually the increase is from objective tinnitus from clenching muscles) poo poo's weird and it's not something most doctors are really going to go in depth on. also if you have tinnitus and have never tried the back of head ear clap thing, google that phrase and try it
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May 9, 2023 01:03
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Cuttlefush posted:also if you have tinnitus and have never tried the back of head ear clap thing, google that phrase and try it I have and there is little to no relief from it, sadly. Thanks for the links to the pubmed articles and appreciate the effortpost!
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May 9, 2023 02:02
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Bilirubin posted:I have not had good results from ENTs, they always seem to look at whatever, shrug and say "nothing can be done". But my tinnitus never went through one of them, I was sent straight to a hearing clinic, they found I had mild hearing loss due to having lived so long, and suggested maybe I could consider hearing aids. Not sure if that would help with the constant ringing but at least I'm able to easily tune it out Bilirubin posted:Then again, my anxiety consult kind of went the same way as an ENT visit this time, since it is a program that only sees you for a single visit, then recommend a bunch of web sites you can go to to work on mindfulness and CBT. Which, fair, but I can google too and already had so Yeah that seems to be the next step once you see an ENT, either go to an audiologist, a specialist, or a hearing aid center. If you're at a point in your life where you can easily tune it out, or where it doesn't interrupt your daily routine or interrupt your sleep, then hearing aids likely won't do much for the tinnitus, though they can certainly help with your overall hearing. But, if your tinnitus IS affecting your life, sleep, and causing anxiety to the point where it's causing a negative feedback loop, there are certainly techniques, technology and even medication that can help. The end goal is habituation, which can take months or even a year, but it's important to understand you can't cure tinnitus, only learn to accept it and in turn not let it affect your fight-or-flight response. Cuttlefush posted:really depends on the kind of tinnitus and hearing aid as to whether they will do anything but in theory they can mask it with different types of noise while still allowing you to hear normally/better (arguable). they can also help if you have contrast-based or sensitive tinnitus. basically some kinds of tinnitus can be alleviated by correcting hearing loss. some can be masked. some can't be. there's no single physical or psychological mechanism. There are many types of tinnitus but objective tinnitus is one of the more rare type; the majority of tinnitus folks experience is subjective tinnitus and in turn a neurological disorder. "Sensitive tinnitus" is called hyperacusis tinnitus and is unfortunately incurable. My youngest daughter has ADHD and experiences hyperacusis with louder environments, like at school. I had really, really bad hyperacusis tinnitus in early April likely spurred by a nasty sinus infection, which got better after taking a course of antibiotics. quote:hearing loss tends to come along with or exacerbate existing tinnitus too. https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC2686891/ is a really good overview of various mechanisms. some tinnitus is caused by audio processing fuckups and disorders that tend to cause or be associated audio processing issues are also associated with tinnitus. e.g. adhd, asd. i don't think there is good clinical evidence but self-reports and anecdotally medication can sometimes resolve or lessen tinnitus. there are some reports/studies on how adhd medications can reduce/cause reported tinnitus (usually the increase is from objective tinnitus from clenching muscles) yeah there are so many instances of tinnitus and the majority of cases tend to resolve themselves, generally within a couple weeks to a month. TMJ can cause it, head injuries, loud concerts, guns, stress, hearing loss, and even some medications (antibiotics and cancer medications, for example). Unfortunately though, there are tens of millions of people worldwide whose tinnitus doesn't resolve, which is where the non-answers from ENT come in and leave people feeling hopeless, and where I saw so much frustration, lost hope, and conspiracy in the Facebook group. "The ENT said there's nothing they can do and I can't afford more help so I drink myself to sleep each night" was a common theme. In connecting with audiologists who practice in my state, the methodology they work through is using hearing aids/tinnitus maskers to not necessarily mask the tinnitus, but to use cognitive behavioral therapy to "train" the brain to get used to noise in your ear, which will lead to habituation. It takes time (months to a year) to see results, but they recommend to NOT mask the tinnitus but instead keep the white/pink noise at a volume right below your existing tinnitus so that your brain gets accustomed to both noises as opposed to using the masking noise as a crutch to override the tinnitus. Of course, that's only one of many tools to utilize. I meditate for at least 1 to 2 hours a day. I take 25mg of CBD morning, afternoon and evening. I don't drink, smoke or consume caffeine, and I more or less follow a Mediterranean diet of fish, vegetables, fruits and grains with low salt. I do take prescribed anti-anxiety medication, which helps to keep me calm during the day, especially when I'm having spikes. Night time is when you're free to fully mask the tinnitus, which is where I use a bluetooth headband to listen to pink noise to get me to sleep, along with sleep stories from my phone via Breethe. I stop looking at screens an hour and a half before bed too. There are lots of things to try and it takes a lot of experimentation to find a routine that works.
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May 9, 2023 02:06
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Bilirubin posted:I have and there is little to no relief from it, sadly. If you're looking for some sound therapy, here's a link to my absolute favorite video I fall asleep to each night, which fully masks my tinnitus: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DJscKr4RV_4 Here's a link to the other two that have helped me ton as well: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8indTo2ykPw https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BIfcqDuOCoA They're very odd at first but after a while you get used to them.
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May 9, 2023 02:08
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I should really talk to my therapist about my recent bouts of explosive bad temper that I've been pushing back through gritted teeth.
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May 9, 2023 02:21
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Zeroisanumber posted:I should really talk to my therapist about my recent bouts of explosive bad temper that I've been pushing back through gritted teeth. That's quite literally what they're there for, yeah. Do you have a problem with bringing it up?
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May 9, 2023 02:30
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DAY 5 WITHOUT MEDS, AND NURSE JUST TOLD ME TO gently caress OFF INSTEAD OF GETTING DOCTOR TO WRITE THIS MONTHS PRESCRIPTION WHY IS THIS SO HARD EVERY loving TIME.
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May 9, 2023 06:17
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StashAugustine posted:That's quite literally what they're there for, yeah. Do you have a problem with bringing it up? I have a history of not realizing how out of the ordinary some of my emotional responses are until it becomes glaringly obvious.
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May 9, 2023 11:02
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Well good that you're recognizing it and trying to bring it up! That's a sign or progress Personally I've been mentally doing a lot better over the past few months but I feel like my body is still hitting me with a bunch of physical anxiety symptoms- been having indigestion for a while, trouble sleeping enough, now I'm back to grinding my teeth. I'm not really under a lot of stress and I'm handling it well, but it still kinda sucks. Am going to a doctor soon so hopefully that will help sort it out
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May 9, 2023 22:08
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Hey, I had a huge breakdown over a year ago in this forum after a decade of self-isolation/PTSD, and wanted to check in and let everyone in here know that I'm doing well; I finally got a decent job with excellent benefits, including health insurance, and am actually seeing better therapy. CBT helped a lot; I had to do a lot of the unpacking on my own, but the contributing arrows and events were easy to remember, and fortunately easy to discuss with therapists. The delusions of grandeur aside, the worst symptoms were the weird heart palpatations and muscular twitching. I was nigh aphasic for a while, like I had a hard-learned mistrust of my own internal monologue that I think swept some of my other networks. Take care of yourselves, remember to get good sleep, and stay hydrated. Your brain pressing eject on itself is loving brutal, but you can overcome anything if you put your mind to it.
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May 10, 2023 17:04
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Waffle House posted:Hey, I had a huge breakdown over a year ago in this forum after a decade of self-isolation/PTSD, and wanted to check in and let everyone in here know that I'm doing well; I finally got a decent job with excellent benefits, including health insurance, and am actually seeing better therapy. That's so good hear!
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May 10, 2023 18:32
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I contacted a number of therapists via psychologytoday.com, and some got back to me. I scheduled an appointment with one who specialized in things appropriate to me. Last time around, no one responded, and the random therapists I was referred to via local clinics were not very good. One guy told me I should reconsider being an atheist. I fired my previous therapist a couple years ago after feedback from friends and people in this very thread. It's honestly been a decade since I had one who seemed empathetic and I liked. I only lost them due to graduating university and losing that insurance. I did a phone interview with one, and she kept asking things like "do you get angry when you think people are stupid?". Then said she planned on interrupting me to draw out my anger lol. I don't know where that came from. I told her about my sister with developmental disabilities, and how I didn't think of her as stupid. Reminded me of a clinician from an intensive outpatient program I did years ago. He would repeatedly cut people off to tell them what they were saying, and why it was wrong. There was a world of difference between him and the ones who expressed real empathy. I'm hoping this one works out. We'll see.
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May 10, 2023 19:36
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Meds finally acquired, holy loving shiiit.
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May 12, 2023 08:17
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AceOfFlames posted:No offense (in fact, it's good you think that way) but this sort of thinking terrifies me. I keep getting the same advice: "Find your community", "Act locally, think globally", etc. I have been bouncing between countries my entire career trying to find stability. I never learned the local language because I have always arrived home too tired to learn and everyone speaks to me in English at work anyway. Also, I don't care about finding an "in group". I don't see things in terms of "in groups". I feel sorry for everyone. I feel sorry for the people living on the street, the poor people who will lose their jobs, the doing ok people who will loseg their jobs. Hell, I even find myself feeling sorry for people like streamers because who knows what their future will be once shortages run out. I refuse to pick a tribe. Tribes are primitive, it's even in the same. And sadly because the way humans work, if you belong to no tribe, every tribe will come after you. you are still in a tribe. there is no escape from us/them.
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May 13, 2023 09:56
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