[Parents] lerned 2 be very cautious with how deep my finger goes into the tankie pamp

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > C-SPAM > [Parents] lerned 2 be very cautious with how deep my finger goes into the tankie pamp

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Mustached Demon: Nov 12, 2016

I've tried many times but I cannot finish the I love you forever book

# ? Jun 8, 2023 15:33

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# ? May 23, 2024 13:53

KirbyKhan: Mar 20, 2009; Soiled Meat

Since we're doing skin color parenting then I win.

I'm Asian/white and raised by cops. My wife is black, rich, and wasn't allowed to watch Simpsons because the children were disrespectful. Our children are Jhene Aiko and Bruno Mars. I just don't buy the Paw Patrol objects at stores, or press the buttons that put paw patrol on tv, or go to the Paw Patrol police dog exhibit at the children's museum.

If child would ever ask for paw patrol thing then I'd just say no, and leave it at that. But like I'm not gonna be wierd about it. When the time is right Ill explain that cops are like bears and if you ever see one in the environment just act accordingly.

If your kids are white it's not a big deal either way have fun

# ? Jun 8, 2023 15:35

Sherbert Hoover: Dec 12, 2019; Working hard, thank you!

500 good dogs posted:

post skin color, op

drat you got me

# ? Jun 8, 2023 15:58

loquacius: Oct 21, 2008

I just told her "maybe later" because it was time for school anyway and am hoping she forgets about it in the interim

I've complained about it ITT before, copaganda is just everywhere in children's media. It's even in Richard Scarry. I try to limit it but she's gonna pick it up because it's just so ubiquitous. She also picked up princess mania at some point somehow (both patriarchal AND royalist, tsk tsk) but that appears to have been a phase since she's over it already

# ? Jun 8, 2023 16:10

Elissimpark: May 20, 2010; Bring me the head of Auguste Escoffier.

My 7yo is on an Enid Blyton binge with the Famous Five books.

Does anyone know of a more modern equivalent? She loves adventure series with caves and tunnels, probably smugglers too.

(I have a feeling she'll love Tintin when she's a bit older.)

# ? Jun 8, 2023 16:23

HootTheOwl: May 13, 2012; Hootin and shootin

KirbyKhan posted:

When the time is right Ill explain that cops are like bears and if you ever see one in the environment just act accordingly.

I would urge you not to try and make yourself look bigger in front of cops.

# ? Jun 8, 2023 17:16

kecske: Feb 28, 2011; it's round, like always

wasn't Enid Blyton insanely racist? I remember one of her stories about a black doll that all the other dolls hated until the rain washed her skin pink and then they all welcomed her back

e: also in the noddy series she wrote about golliwogs that stole his car and abandoned him in the woods

kecske has issued a correction as of 17:19 on Jun 8, 2023

# ? Jun 8, 2023 17:16

KirbyKhan: Mar 20, 2009; Soiled Meat

HootTheOwl posted:

I would urge you not to try and make yourself look bigger in front of cops.

Grizzley Bears, not brown bears

# ? Jun 8, 2023 17:45

HootTheOwl: May 13, 2012; Hootin and shootin

KirbyKhan posted:

Grizzley Bears, not brown bears

Those are the same thing

# ? Jun 8, 2023 18:46

silvergoose: Mar 18, 2006; IT IS SAID THE TEARS OF THE BWEENIX CAN HEAL ALL WOUNDS

What would an owl know about different types of bears, anyway??

# ? Jun 8, 2023 19:27

Struensee: Nov 9, 2011

loquacius posted:

I've complained about it ITT before, copaganda is just everywhere in children's media. It's even in Richard Scarry. I try to limit it but she's gonna pick it up because it's just so ubiquitous. She also picked up princess mania at some point somehow (both patriarchal AND royalist, tsk tsk) but that appears to have been a phase since she's over it already

Maybe you should start raising her papist, as The Lord intended.

# ? Jun 8, 2023 20:33

Greg Legg: Oct 6, 2004

KirbyKhan posted:

Since we're doing skin color parenting then I win.

I'm Asian/white and raised by cops. My wife is black, rich, and wasn't allowed to watch Simpsons because the children were disrespectful. Our children are Jhene Aiko and Bruno Mars. I just don't buy the Paw Patrol objects at stores, or press the buttons that put paw patrol on tv, or go to the Paw Patrol police dog exhibit at the children's museum.

If child would ever ask for paw patrol thing then I'd just say no, and leave it at that. But like I'm not gonna be wierd about it. When the time is right Ill explain that cops are like bears and if you ever see one in the environment just act accordingly.

If your kids are white it's not a big deal either way have fun

Yeah honestly I don't let them watch Paw Patrol anymore because I don't think it's very good, not for any political reason.

The Paw Patrol phase was pretty much over until grandma bought the oldest a bicycle with Chase on it. Oh well!

# ? Jun 8, 2023 21:00

Mustached Demon: Nov 12, 2016

cop worship aside, paw patrol instills the idea that a nepo baby with unlimited resources is a better person than you

plus it's blatant TV show to sell toys consumerism

# ? Jun 8, 2023 21:44

Nocturtle: Mar 17, 2007

We let our children watch "Ben & Holly's Little Kingdom" a bit last year, from the same people as "Peppa Pig". It's a cartoon depiction of a deeply classist (British) society presented as completely normal and fun! Probably should avoid.

We watched the French dubbed version and must admit that I found Roi Chardon delightful.

# ? Jun 8, 2023 21:50

Second Hand Meat Mouth: Sep 12, 2001

the biggest reason to avoid peppa pig is your kid will say words wrong like "aeroplane" and "blueb'rry"

# ? Jun 8, 2023 22:29

Elissimpark: May 20, 2010; Bring me the head of Auguste Escoffier.

kecske posted:

wasn't Enid Blyton insanely racist? I remember one of her stories about a black doll that all the other dolls hated until the rain washed her skin pink and then they all welcomed her back

e: also in the noddy series she wrote about golliwogs that stole his car and abandoned him in the woods

I wouldn't say insanely racist, but yeah, she was a middle class conservative Brit from the early 1900's with all the classism and xenophobia that implies.

The "Boy's Own" style of adventure is appealing, but having to explain problematic plot elements is obviously annoying.

(Fun fact: Enid Blyton was apparently fond of playing nude tennis.)

# ? Jun 8, 2023 22:32

AxGrap: Jan 11, 2005; ☝☯ Ŧ𝓤𝒸Ҝ 𝓨𝕠𝔲! 🐼👽

Watching dark wing duck atm. My brother and I just downloaded all the shows we liked as kids. Kid gets to zone out, nostalgia, and bonding in one.

# ? Jun 8, 2023 22:47

AxGrap: Jan 11, 2005; ☝☯ Ŧ𝓤𝒸Ҝ 𝓨𝕠𝔲! 🐼👽

Also, Chase is just a traffic cop, nothing to worry about. Paw patrol is set in a fantasy city where there are public services.

# ? Jun 8, 2023 22:49

Microplastics: Jul 6, 2007; It's what's for dinner.

Reading this article made me tear up a lil

To my friend who worries about becoming a parent: here are some things to hold on to

quote:

I decided to write this column in the format of a letter. I wanted to set myself the writing challenge of citing some of the many positive things about having a baby without being saccharine, resorting to cliche or generalising, and the only way I could find was this way. It’s addressed to one person, but I hope that those who find themselves at a similar crossroads take succour from it.

--

To my friend A,

When you sidled up to me at a party recently and confessed that you wanted to have a baby, we were both drunk. So when you said that you needed reassurance that it wouldn’t be awful, because all you ever seem to hear about parenthood is negative, I probably didn’t give you what you needed that night. I’ve been mulling over what you said ever since.

I read somewhere not long ago that children ruin your life. I do not feel this (I was at a party, for a start). You create a new life in that child, and with that baby, you get a new life, too. I look back on my old self with fondness, and a little indulgence. She had a lot of fun, but it was time for a new adventure. A baby is more than just an adventure, though: you’re embarking on an epic quest that will hopefully see them safely into adulthood. We hear a lot about the obstacles we meet on the way and less about the wonders we encounter, so I wanted to say that: you will experience wonder the likes of which you can’t imagine now.

The wonder seems mundane to other people, of course, and that’s part of the problem. For example: my baby is doing this thing at the moment where he has started kissing his favourite characters in the books we read. Every time he does it I feel a soaring happiness that feels almost criminal, like I’m getting away with something. What I’m saying is that you can spend your whole life trying to be happy, taking up wild swimming or yoga or microdosing LSD or having therapy, but, for me, nothing has come close to the feeling of watching my child launch himself at a drawing of a fluorescent pink simian who has just learned the importance of saying sorry to an elephant with hurt feelings.

It’s not just your happiness, either: it’s theirs. Giving your baby a lovely day feels genuinely fulfilling for you, but less selfishly, joy has been created for them, and the amount of happiness on this planet has increased. It may be by a tiny amount, in a global context, but to that child, it is everything.

Another one of those cliches is that it’s “a love unlike any other” – a nonsense, because no love is like any other. What I will say is that it’s a love that feels primal and molecular. It has a before, and an after. Before I felt this love, I could imagine it, because like most humans I am capable of empathy, but I had not lived with it. The life I had before I got to feel this love feels like less of a life. That is not to say that I believe people who are not parents live less meaningful lives. I don’t, at all. But my life has greater meaning to me, for loving him.

And of course, his life has meaning. He exists! It still feels wild and miraculous that this should be the case, and not just because it wasn’t the easiest birth (try not to worry about the birth. We usually hear the horror stories, and they are important, but good births happen, too). Becoming a mother – and giving birth – has enhanced my feelings of solidarity with other women. It is a solidarity that is physical, intellectual, emotional and political. It is also historical. I feel empathy with women who lived and died many centuries before I even existed. And that has expanded my heart and my mind.

When I became a mother, it was as though all the mothers in my life, even peripherally, received some sort of alert signal, and rallied. Even the mothers of friends of mine, whom I rarely see, sent gifts and messages. Other mothers brought meals or gave breastfeeding support or medical advice. Their well wishes, guidance and care held me in an embrace that lasted for many months after the birth. My own mother’s embrace, and my father’s, not to mention my extended family’s, have kept me going.

We are used to hearing about how motherhood limits and constricts your life, less so about how it can expand it. A world of other mothers – other parents, actually – has revealed itself to me. I have always believed that life is fundamentally about human relationships, and having a baby has enhanced mine. I love my husband more than ever.

Parenting has also allowed me to experience childhood again. I always wanted to give someone else a childhood. My wide-eyed little boy is at the stage where he is simply in love with the world, and that love is thrillingly unconditional (he is beside himself every time he sees a pigeon). It is a privilege to witness, and it makes me determined to maintain it for him as much as I am able, because his laugh is the best sound that I have ever heard.

A note about sleep: you will be OK – you’ve had enough wild nights to know you can cope. And you can get your body back, whatever that might mean to you. I feel I have (ish). As for your career, it’s normal to worry. I speak only for myself when I say that I wish I had spent less time fretting beforehand about how I would write. I have far less time, now, but I’m still writing. Even a paragraph a day adds up to a novel, eventually.

There is so much untapped joy, hilarity and love there waiting for you, and I hope I’ve given you a small glimpse of some of it to hold on to.

# ? Jun 8, 2023 23:05

KirbyKhan: Mar 20, 2009; Soiled Meat

I like Blues Clues cuz it is kinda gay

# ? Jun 8, 2023 23:06

ikanreed: Sep 25, 2009; I honestly I have no idea who cannibal[SIC] is and I do not know why I should know.

syq dude, just syq!

My three year old shows no interest in paw patrol, but we have convinced him journey to the west (in Chinese) is fun to watch.

My take so far: sun wukong is right, and you should eat all the gods' peaches.

# ? Jun 8, 2023 23:36

Elissimpark: May 20, 2010; Bring me the head of Auguste Escoffier.

ikanreed posted:

My three year old shows no interest in paw patrol, but we have convinced him journey to the west (in Chinese) is fun to watch.

My take so far: sun wukong is right, and you should eat all the gods' peaches.

Fighting and magical shenanigans, what's not to love.

Explaining story to 3yo: what don't we do if we meet the Buddha?
3yo after some thought: pee on their hand!

# ? Jun 8, 2023 23:56

AxGrap: Jan 11, 2005; ☝☯ Ŧ𝓤𝒸Ҝ 𝓨𝕠𝔲! 🐼👽

What age do you think is appropriate to start watching avatar (anime)? I have never seen it

# ? Jun 8, 2023 23:57

silvergoose: Mar 18, 2006; IT IS SAID THE TEARS OF THE BWEENIX CAN HEAL ALL WOUNDS

AxGrap posted:

What age do you think is appropriate to start watching avatar (anime)? I have never seen it

We just started showing our 8yo and it seems exactly perfect for him, so...8

# ? Jun 9, 2023 00:36

lobster shirt: Jun 14, 2021

my son's favorite show is leo the truck. loves those big machines.

# ? Jun 9, 2023 01:15

Panfilo: Aug 27, 2011; EXISTENCE IS PAIN😬

My kids are into storybots which is surprisingly good and factual. I love over explaining things to my kids and now they're like "pfft we already know about airplanes and lift from watching Netflix". They got some good guest stars too.

People put off by the princess stuff can always spin it that our world has the potential to have everyone live like a princess if everyone cooperated and cared enough. I mean who wouldn't want an idyllic life where working was completely optional and you were free to pursue your own interests?

# ? Jun 9, 2023 03:32

DR FRASIER KRANG: Feb 4, 2005; "Are you forgetting that just this afternoon I was punched in the face by a turtle now dead?

storybots is super good, yes.

also my kids love Number Blocks and sing along to all the songs. they'll watch it for like an hour straight.

# ? Jun 9, 2023 03:34

F Stop Fitzgerald: Dec 12, 2010

field trip tomorrow is cancelled due to air quality and kid now is racist against canada

# ? Jun 9, 2023 05:35

bitmap: Aug 8, 2006

Nocturtle posted:

We let our children watch "Ben & Holly's Little Kingdom" a bit last year, from the same people as "Peppa Pig". It's a cartoon depiction of a deeply classist (British) society presented as completely normal and fun! Probably should avoid.

We watched the French dubbed version and must admit that I found Roi Chardon delightful.

Heh, I don't know man, the "elves" are hard working geniuses who create all manner of wonders and the "fairies" are lazy feckless idiots who just wave their dumb wands to solve problems and gently caress it up every time. It's not exactly the lion king.

# ? Jun 9, 2023 10:45

brugroffil: Nov 30, 2015

DR FRASIER KRANG posted:

storybots is super good, yes.

also my kids love Number Blocks and sing along to all the songs. they'll watch it for like an hour straight.

My 4yo last night as we're turning off number blocks to go up to bed: "awww but I wan learn more math!"

# ? Jun 9, 2023 11:14

HootTheOwl: May 13, 2012; Hootin and shootin

Mrs. The Owl is off getting her diabeties test. Her mom had it every pregnancy and her and her brother were giant-rear end babies, so I assume she will too.

# ? Jun 9, 2023 13:59

lobster shirt: Jun 14, 2021

F Stop Fitzgerald posted:

field trip tomorrow is cancelled due to air quality

bad

F Stop Fitzgerald posted:

kid now is racist against canada

excellent

# ? Jun 9, 2023 14:04

tristeham: Jul 31, 2022

F Stop Fitzgerald posted:

kid now is racist against canada

good kid

# ? Jun 9, 2023 14:18

BonHair: Apr 28, 2007

HootTheOwl posted:

Mrs. The Owl is off getting her diabeties test. Her mom had it every pregnancy and her and her brother were giant-rear end babies, so I assume she will too.

Get some preeclampsia, they kinda cancel each other out on baby size! No wait, don't, that actually sucked.
I think if you just keep it under control, it's gonna be completely fine, including normal size baby. So more lobster craving, less bread sticks

# ? Jun 9, 2023 16:07

loquacius: Oct 21, 2008

Last night, the baby (~5 weeks) went down at 10pm and slept for 4 hours 45 minutes, his longest stretch ever. Unfortunately, we couldn't really enjoy it because in addition to his later wakeups, the 2-year-old woke us up twice last night. Once was because she had dropped the wooden ball she insisted on sleeping with outside her crib and needed me to give it back to her. The other was for no known reason. She was then up for the day at 5:50. Parenthood

# ? Jun 11, 2023 11:29

Flambeau: Aug 5, 2015; Plaster Town Cop

We kept our 2-yr old up late so he could chase lighting bugs. He was elated.
It brought back a lot of good memories for us and was delightful to experience as a parent.

# ? Jun 11, 2023 12:50

Microplastics: Jul 6, 2007; It's what's for dinner.

Flambeau posted:

We kept our 2-yr old up late so he could chase lighting bugs. He was elated.
It brought back a lot of good memories for us and was delightful to experience as a parent.