Invisible Clergy posted:

One of the all time thread villains. Post is here for newcomers but as you said is pretty rough.

quote:

TLDR: Boyfriend gifted me a self help book out of the blue and I found it funny.

As the total says my boyfriend (34m) gave me (26f) a self help book, at first I was really polite when he gave it me, told him I really appreciated it etc. but then he noticed me smiling slightly and asked if I found something funny then I started laughing and he took offence at it.

I’m feeling kinda offended that he just sprung this on me out of nowhere without talking to me about it. I also found it funny that no one had ever gifted me a self help book before, feels a bit like a back handed gift.

He thinks I have depression, and I have struggled with mental health in the past. But I think I have linked my depressive episodes with my cycle as it happens in the pms stage, which I’ve read up on and seems like lots of other women suffer with it too.

Now he’s mad at me that I found it funny but I’m feeling kinda offended. I know the thought behind it but I feel there’s better ways to go about getting someone help than just coming up to them randomly and giving them a self help book.

Drunk Nerds posted:

I have a knack for event planning, so it always shocks me at how utterly bad other people can be at it

When you throw a party for a small child, you take RSVPs. Everyone does it, literally every party I've thrown for my sons and every party they've been invited to does it.

So these 7 year old's family members just... didn't take RSVPs? They also didn't text other families to see if they were coming?

That, I just... that's like scuba diving without a tank and expecting to breathe underwater. I'm really struggling to come up with a metaphor here. I'm shook.

They had the foresight to decorate, even. How do you just assume people will show up and not send a text or two?

Drunk Nerds posted:

I have a knack for event planning, so it always shocks me at how utterly bad other people can be at it

When you throw a party for a small child, you take RSVPs. Everyone does it, literally every party I've thrown for my sons and every party they've been invited to does it.

So these 7 year old's family members just... didn't take RSVPs? They also didn't text other families to see if they were coming?

That, I just... that's like scuba diving without a tank and expecting to breathe underwater. I'm really struggling to come up with a metaphor here. I'm shook.

They had the foresight to decorate, even. How do you just assume people will show up and not send a text or two?

quote:

Lawyers keep saying they need to write the agreement themselves
OK so I've written up a solid child support agreement which will be signed by myself and my ex partner, however it needs signatures from lawyers from both parties.

So how the heck can I get signatures if the lawyers just want to "write their own" agreement to charge insane prices?

quote:

Being charged for something I didn't do
OK do pretty straight forward, I've been contacted by the police and they stated my bike left the scene of an accident on a freeway. Apparently there was damage to a mirror. The only evidence they have is my bike colour and license plate and a witness statement.

I got legal advice where they told me to just pay it and be done with it but when I contacted the officer in charge of the case, she said she can't because there's a witness statement so it's up to the courts.

I don't get it, the witness could be the guys mate and without seeing the statement myself, how can I determine its even a worthy statement?

I cant believe the officer can't just let me pay and move on. Is that normal?

quote:

Is it a sign of guilt if I do this?
Recently I received a visit from 2 Police officers who were asking me questions regarding a traffic incident. Apparently there was a witness along with the victim who saw my motorcycle damage another car and fled the scene. Obviously all this was news to me. I've never been in an accident or hit another vehicle and fled the scene. It is a classic he said, she said case.

I have already found discrepancies in the witness statement so I'm happy I can get that thrown out however, to avoid spending 5k + in legal fees, I was going to just call the police and ask them to contact the victim, get the quote for repairs and I'll just cover it to save the stress, money and time wasted in me proving I'm innocent.

If I do this, will this make me look guilty in anyway?

quote:

OK so the issue I'm having is my ex has gone and tried to put a 2 year ADVO on me with false allegations. Obviously I'm fighting it but I was tempted to agree to the advo but not the admissions which would mean I don't have to talk or see her for 2 years.

Invisible Clergy posted:

One of the all time thread villains. Post is here for newcomers but as you said is pretty rough.

quote:

I guess it isn't as black and white as I thought.

Cowslips Warren posted:

AITA for telling my family that my kids and I will not be visiting if we can't bring my husband's sister?

quote:

Now they're saying I'm a bad mom to my bio kids for taking away their grandparents

quote:

Meanwhile, my 7-year-old cousin's birthday party was scheduled from 12:00 to 5:30.

wilderthanmild posted:

So this post isn't THAT interesting on it's own. Bog standard bullshit where some guy is trying to get his wife to sign a child support agreement and is upset that lawyers wont sign it without drafting an actual legal document instead of one he wrote himself. Most likely it's some kind of non-standard unenforceable nonsense he got chatGPT to poo poo out. He is of course angrily responding to every poster telling him the myriad reasons that no lawyer will just sign his self written document.

OP posted:

I cant believe the officer can't just let me pay and move on. Is that normal?

quote:

Yes that’s normal, as this is a crime, not just a traffic violation.

wilderthanmild posted:

So this post isn't THAT interesting on it's own. Bog standard bullshit where some guy is trying to get his wife to sign a child support agreement and is upset that lawyers wont sign it without drafting an actual legal document instead of one he wrote himself. Most likely it's some kind of non-standard unenforceable nonsense he got chatGPT to poo poo out. He is of course angrily responding to every poster telling him the myriad reasons that no lawyer will just sign his self written document.

However, this guy's post history has some amazing details about the kind of person he is.



A few other highlights, just as titles:
Where are the negative reports or articles regarding covid vaccines?
Why is there no bad news about covid or the vaccine online?
What opener do you use when meeting a stranger on an online dating site?
Note this is well before he starts mentioning divorce and he says he's looking for "Something casual"

Also lots of posts claim his ex agreed to everything and it's amicable, but this sure doesn't sound like it:

ADVO is a restraining order specific to domestic violence

Beyond that just standard internet dipshit stuff where he's really into crypto, specifically the knockoff of doge coin, shiba inu coin lol

I just fell completely down this rabbit hole. Absolute shocker this guy is getting divorced.

Foo Diddley posted:

lol this guy is going to represent himself in court and get absolutely reamed

that is, if he doesn't go to jail first:

tactlessbastard posted:

I missed this last night but the I wouldn’t take my kids to a 5.5 hour birthday party, either.

quote:

What about an engagement ring?

Kitfox88 posted:

Pages ago but r/relationships: My code may be flawed, but it's my code.

MK-Ultramarathon posted:

I don't know if that's exactly what's going on here, it could be the girlfriend is more just covering for her bf not wanting to hang out with this person anymore either, since OP is like "oh yeah whoopsie doodle I accidentally told him I loved him then accidentally went right off and hooked up with somebody else".

quote:

So for context we're both 27M and have been together for around 8 years. I work a job that pays 60K a year and he is unemployed and collects 'benefits' off of his parents. He's been unemployed since covid when he was fired and never got round to finding a job again.

Recently I've been looking into buying a house. He's been supportive of this and getting us out of the crazy renting market. I managed to find a house I love and talked to him about it. We visited together and decided this is the one.

Now it gets to paperwork and mortgage stuff and I complete it and pay the deposit. I tell him that it's all gone through and we should be on track to moving in a couple of months. He asks to go through the paperwork and I agree. 3 days later he confronts me and asks why everything is in my name. I reply because it's my money and I'm the one paying the mortgage, you're not putting any money or effort into the property. He retaliates saying I'm being financially abusive and says that I can't expect to own everything.

Later on we talk again and we discuss our issues with it. I agreed that in my will the house is left to him, as well as most of my savings. He says it's not enough and if we split up he's left with nothing. It gets heated and I tell him of he wanted a house he should have worked for it, not stayed at home and relied on me. I said if he wanted to be on the mortgage it means he will have to find a job that pays the same as mine.

The argument hasn't really resolved itself and I'm wondering now whether I am being inconsiderate of him. I really don't know what to do.

Kitfox88 posted:

Pages ago but r/relationships: My code may be flawed, but it's my code.

Pomme de Terror posted:

AITA for not putting my partners name on the house?

greazeball posted:

She dumped you for the afterlife, babe! Just get over it already!

Fil5000 posted:

This is easy, if you want to stay with the guy put him on the mortgage, if you don't tell him to pound sand.

Fil5000 posted:

This is easy, if you want to stay with the guy put him on the mortgage, if you don't tell him to pound sand.

keep punching joe posted:

I don't think you can have your name on the deed (in the UK) if you aren't responsible for the mortgage.

hallo spacedog posted:

Kitfox88 posted:

Pages ago but r/relationships: My code may be flawed, but it's my code.

tactlessbastard posted:

I missed this last night but the I wouldn’t take my kids to a 5.5 hour birthday party, either.

run on sentience posted:

Why? That's 5.5 hours of free babysitting. It's not like you have to stay there yourself.

Pope Corky the IX posted:

Can you link me to the story when you get a chance? I'm not finding it in a search.

quote:

Some background is required before I start the post. So my (M21) gf (F22) grew up in multiple foster homes. She is also white. When she was 15, she got pregnant by her boyfriend (M16 at the time) and her (at the time) foster father kicked her out of the home. She moved in with her boyfriend's parents. She ended up miscarrying and her boyfriend passed away when she was 17, but since she did not have a real family to go back to, she stayed with her ex's parents even after he passed.

We met at college and started dating before going home for the summer. She told me about all of this and I was sympathetic because this sounds like a very difficult thing to go through. The problem came when she wanted to introduce me to her family. I came over for dinner one night and found out that her family and ex are black. I have no issue with interracial relationships or black people, but she never mentioned this to me and I just assumed they were white.

I was super uncomfortable the entire time because of this. It was extremely awkward, and when I tried to leave after dinner she followed me out to ask if there was something wrong. I told her I did appreciate being lied to. She asked what I meant and I explained. She told me that she never claimed they weren't black and that I was being ridiculous. I explained that lying by omission is still lying, and then I did something that might make me the AH.

This started an argument and in the middle of the argument I told her that it is weird to consider them family without explaining that because nobody would ever look at them and assume she was part of their family. I know that was rude, but I was angry. She called me a racist piece of poo poo and told me to leave. I left and we didn't talk for a couple days. After telling my sister, she said that I was disrespectful and should apologize. I sent my gf a message saying we needed to talk about this and we can resolve it, but she won't answer it and it goes to voicemail every time I call. After what my sister said and realizing I came off as rude, I feel like I could be in the wrong here, so AITA?

Foo Diddley posted:

AITA for confronting my gf for lying?

you left the "ex" off of "gf" there, OP

Pomme de Terror posted:

AITA for not putting my partners name on the house?

Akratic Method posted:

It's not a link, but it was the guy who argued with his girlfriend about killing a spider because of HONOR.

Foo Diddley posted:

AITA for confronting my gf for lying?

you left the "ex" off of "gf" there, OP