(Thread IKs:
Josherino)
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Girlfriend is feeling a bit better. This hurts so much. I'm the only one of us who can semi-reliably cook, and even then maybe a meal or two and then the rest of the night is takeout. And if I can't cook atm, then neither of us eats, simple as that, until either I find the energy somewhere in me or someone donates us enough money to order something. My parents have been helping paying for some basics but I can never put together a list because I'm holding back the hoover dam's worth of emotional anguish at any time and that makes conversation difficult. Thing is I don't feel like I'm spiraling right now. I know I'm pouring out a lot of emotion in this post but I don't feel overwhelmed by it. On the upside, having a guitar to stream helps to relax me, and I've been looking into yoga, which is honestly really interesting as both a form of exercise and mindfullness as well as a historic tradition. SardonicTyrant has issued a correction as of 16:00 on Jul 31, 2023 |
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Jul 31, 2023 15:55
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| # ? May 20, 2024 21:37 |
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microwaved hot dogs are a meal too. don't feel like you have to heat something up on the stove for it to be real food. paper plates if you're not feeling like dishes too. if you're giving yourself grief over something or can't find the energy, you don't have to do it. I got some packs of really tasty dried noodles (think ramen+ but without the soup) and they're great for when I feel like putting in a tiny bit of effort (boiling water) but I still nuke hot dogs if I just wanna eat without being alive.
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Jul 31, 2023 21:24
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I loving love cooking, it is arguably my favorite activity of all, and even then, even as a person who practically lives to cook, I still really appreciate having some "needs no or extremely minimal cooking" things around. Sometimes that means cooking stuff in advance, but often it means being ready to just have like peanut butter toast.
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Aug 1, 2023 02:06
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Without low effort meal options I think I'd definitely have starved. Canned soups over rice, these like dollar a bag microwavable 'rice' monstrosities https://www.knorr.com/us/en/products/sides.html, cheese, frozen dumplings, canned or frozen veggies, is all stuff you can basically microwave or otherwise heat up and have something that while maybe not healthy is certainly better than just not eating all day. Just try to get lower sodium options if you end up going heavy on the canned stuff, the salt content can be really shocking sometimes. edit: also if you have good bagels or similar get a bunch when you are motivated, slice em in half and freeze em. They'll toast up fine and a bagel with butter or cream cheese is also better than starving.
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Aug 1, 2023 11:10
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i got an instant rice cooker and as someone with near-constant sleep/sensory-related energy problems, it's the best kitchen-related purchase i've ever made in my life. basically it tips the balance between making something lazy but still actual food vs. living off frozen and canned poo poo
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Aug 1, 2023 13:47
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Slow cooker are also nice for that, dump a bunch of poo poo in it before work and come back to dinner
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Aug 1, 2023 13:49
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I'm on 4 different casual drugs. My father is almost certainly dying of lung cancer. I just got handed 6 months of work to complete in 4 weeks. My record player has a new cartridge. Let's rock.
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Aug 4, 2023 03:00
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(CW: Climate doomerism) I've been in the utter pits for two weeks. I can't help but feel society will utterly collapse in less than 10 years and I will be reduced to digging in the dirt with my family who belittles and doesn't respect me. I have no friends, no one else who cares if I live or die, I have spent the past 10 years in foreign countries where I didn't even speak the language, my home country will be destroyed by climate change, I feel like I am just running out the clock and I hate it. I am both enraged but also get some schadenfreude at my family being far more paranoid over nuclear war over Ukraine than climate change (which they all insist "will only screw over the poor. it's a shame but it's what it is") Honestly [REDACTED]. AceOfFlames has issued a correction as of 18:53 on Aug 7, 2023 |
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Aug 5, 2023 16:07
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Please don't say that me dying would be a mercy, thanks
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Aug 6, 2023 03:15
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Jorge Bell posted:Please don't say that me dying would be a mercy, thanks It wouldn't be. We're glad you're around.
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Aug 6, 2023 03:53
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ace of flames you do not sound mentally well at all. you're emotions and thinking are way out of whack and no amount of studies about the ocean streams collapsing or whatever makes you "right". if you were someone i knew irl i would absolutely ask if i could drive you to an in-patient center because i'd be worried as hell. and i think it's been like this for around a year or so right?
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Aug 6, 2023 05:57
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AceOfFlames posted:(CW: Climate doomerism) mate you should just accept that your position here in this little blip of an existence is to open your eyes as wide as you can to watch
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Aug 6, 2023 06:09
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SardonicTyrant posted:Girlfriend is feeling a bit better. This hurts so much. I'm the only one of us who can semi-reliably cook, and even then maybe a meal or two and then the rest of the night is takeout. And if I can't cook atm, then neither of us eats, simple as that, until either I find the energy somewhere in me or someone donates us enough money to order something. My parents have been helping paying for some basics but I can never put together a list because I'm holding back the hoover dam's worth of emotional anguish at any time and that makes conversation difficult. basically huevos rancheros without the sometimes insurmountable and horrifying prospect of having to crack some eggs and heat a pan edit: you don't even need a plate or utensils, you can eat it laying in bed, all you need is a can opener or tbh a pocket knife opens cans fine, just don't do that in bed, roll over and put the can on the floor so you don't cut an artery and the EMS guys will laugh at how stupid you died and that you have bad taste in wall-scrolls your assignment this week is to watch 1999's "Fight Club" but only the first half Gravid Topiary has issued a correction as of 06:29 on Aug 6, 2023 |
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Aug 6, 2023 06:23
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thehandtruck posted:ace of flames you do not sound mentally well at all. you're emotions and thinking are way out of whack and no amount of studies about the ocean streams collapsing or whatever makes you "right". if you were someone i knew irl i would absolutely ask if i could drive you to an in-patient center because i'd be worried as hell. and i think it's been like this for around a year or so right? Much longer (maybe 10 years?). I do my best to avoid these sorts of news (I have a hard self ban from the climate change thread) but it seems all PERVASIVE. A random YouTube video or a comedy podcast will at some point have someone say "society is collapsing" and it will all rush in. I wonder how many people KNOW these things and just don't talk about them, out of optimism that somehow a Deus ex machina will appear. I have tried 5 therapist but they all seem to say the same thing: "deal with it when it comes". "have you tried exercising?" "Well you look fine to me so if your antidepressants don't work then I don't have to refill them". Yeah, thanks. AceOfFlames has issued a correction as of 10:30 on Aug 6, 2023 |
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Aug 6, 2023 10:20
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Gravid Topiary posted:refried beans (canned are fine) and tortillas (packaged are fine) and the thickest salsa you can find is my zero effort meal when i'm in a bad way mentally and don't want to eat let alone cook Also nothing wrong with my wall-scrolls, more people should be watching Redline.
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Aug 6, 2023 11:18
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AceOfFlames posted:Much longer (maybe 10 years?). I do my best to avoid these sorts of news (I have a hard self ban from the climate change thread) but it seems all PERVASIVE. A random YouTube video or a comedy podcast will at some point have someone say "society is collapsing" and it will all rush in. I wonder how many people KNOW these things and just don't talk about them, out of optimism that somehow a Deus ex machina will appear. I don't know if or even think things will get better before they get worse but my ability to change that is effectively nil, and stirring myself up over something that I can't change is literally, actually, non-pejoratively crazy
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Aug 6, 2023 11:27
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ace, i don't think there's anything i or anyone else could say that would immediately dissolve a decade worth of climate grief for you but i can say it's not a feeling you're experiencing exclusively. other people deal with it to varying degrees of success in their own ways. that being said, certain reactions to things, any thing really, are all pretty similar across the board. anger, for example - at your family, at the world - are responses that still suggest some desire for control over the situation, which is still normal. anger suggests other people can change, that they have the power to do so. accepting that Thing is happening is a seemingly powerless position.
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Aug 6, 2023 14:00
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I should feel happy about my new job but I’m feeling pretty anxious about everything. It’s a retail pharmacy tech job and it seems like this location is having staffing problems which is not a great sign. I mean, I need the job but also I really don’t like the idea of being stuck working a terrible job for several months until I can find something better. Please help me see this in a better light so I stop making myself miserable.
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Aug 6, 2023 19:27
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ace of flames you are currently (always?) in crisis and need to talk to a MH professional
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Aug 6, 2023 19:39
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Jorge Bell posted:ace of flames you are currently (always?) in crisis and need to talk to a MH professional im feeling better, don't worry. My therapist is currently on holiday but she has told me to call her whenever I need to. I finally managed to distract myself enough and am doing ok. I know it might not seem like it but I think these crises (at least when they feel particularly intense) happen further and further apart, which I think is an improvement. for some reason this one lasted longer than usual. Thank you for your concern.
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Aug 6, 2023 21:22
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AceOfFlames posted:im feeling better, don't worry. My therapist is currently on holiday but she has told me to call her whenever I need to. I finally managed to distract myself enough and am doing ok. I know it might not seem like it but I think these crises (at least when they feel particularly intense) happen further and further apart, which I think is an improvement. for some reason this one lasted longer than usual. Thank you for your concern. I'm glad you have resources and would encourage you to mention you have them and aren't planning something spicy the next time you express deeply nihilistic ideas. As much as I'm happy to hear that you're doing okay, I'm more asking this for my own sake since I get extremely activated when you say poo poo like "it would be better if humanity was deleted before the effects of climate change happen".
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Aug 7, 2023 09:33
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Right, I was out of line there and maybe I should not have said that. My apologies. Feel free to redact anything as you see fit. I will do so on my end.
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Aug 7, 2023 18:53
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AceOfFlames posted:Right, I was out of line there and maybe I should not have said that. My apologies. Feel free to redact anything as you see fit. I will do so on my end. Checking in: I appreciate your vulnerability here. It takes a considerable amount of courage to apologize in a space like this - thank you. You've always been a consistent poster here, and you're always welcome to express what you're carrying. I know I've been able to learn a lot about myself and how what I say affects my outlook or day. Josherino has issued a correction as of 05:24 on Aug 8, 2023 |
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Aug 8, 2023 04:12
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AceOfFlames posted:Right, I was out of line there and maybe I should not have said that. My apologies. Feel free to redact anything as you see fit. I will do so on my end. Goon, I'm like a break-up and my cat dying unexpectedly away from ending back up in that place where people give me Haldol and free grippy socks. We all have bad days.
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Aug 8, 2023 04:18
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Zeroisanumber posted:Goon, I'm like a break-up and my cat dying unexpectedly away from ending back up in that place where people give me Haldol and free grippy socks. We all have bad days. I had to get a new glass of water after reading “grippy socks”. Needed goon humor today, thank you friend.
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Aug 8, 2023 05:25
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Doc gave me a bump in my ADHD meds because the lower dosage wasn't doing much but I think we hosed up because I don't feel more focused, just kinda high.
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Aug 12, 2023 05:28
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Called my dad because I got a new video card and PC gaming was one of the few things to bond over. He didn't really care and instead the conversation went to trying to get me to not move away, and also to not married. Wonderful. Like, nobody in my family seems happy that I'm getting married, just clutching their pearls and yelling "What about me?" and "You owe us for having you", like if they had a genie wish they'd probably have me dump my fiance and move back into my old room so I can be their butler until literally they die. I'm moving and my sister had her sanity literally screamed out of her, so they feel they're holding an "empty bag" now. It's empty you guys  No they won't accept living somewhere else and getting this care they're entitled to, has to be on their terms. My dad's been pretty clear that having kids was an enormous burden and he expects a return, so yeah, I wasn't just imagining it lol. I'm sure if I laid it all out, he'd deny it of course. I've never actually had a reckoning because I stayed at that house for most of my 20s and didn't want to set off a fight that causes rapid unplanned eviction. Like, this guy says how we don't have many family memories even though every time we've tried he's having a low-grade tantrum the entire time because oh my god, trips cost money and we have to eat out which also costs money. And this is when trips aren't cancelled because he had a high grade tantrum about a glass getting in the getting in the garbage disposal. So I'm a little more on board with the move now.Plus I figure when push comes to shove they're still going to take the "adult son is your butler in a place that isn't your special personal house" over a nursing home.
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Aug 14, 2023 19:08
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That's rough to deal with skooma. When I invited my mom to my apartment a few times she immediately set about cleaning everything against my feeble protests. I felt so ashamed that the next time my dad came over I asked him to take a hotel because I was so deeply ashamed of how 'messy' our place was. He took that very very personally and basically stopped talking to me for years. It was world-shaking when my girlfriend moved in with me and how utterly easy and unstressful it was to have her existing in the same space as me (because my girlfriend is cool and good). SardonicTyrant has issued a correction as of 19:17 on Aug 14, 2023 |
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Aug 14, 2023 19:14
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skooma512 posted:Called my dad because I got a new video card and PC gaming was one of the few things to bond over. He didn't really care and instead the conversation went to trying to get me to not move away, and also to not married. Wonderful. Like, nobody in my family seems happy that I'm getting married, just clutching their pearls and yelling "What about me?" and "You owe us for having you", like if they had a genie wish they'd probably have me dump my fiance and move back into my old room so I can be their butler until literally they die. have you ever thought for a single second about your parents needs and their needs alone, to the total exclusion of your own sanity and happiness how selfish of you you're actually marrying someone you love and want to go elsewhere what is wrong with you dont you know that for the crime of being born youve earned mutliple life sentences your moms and dads specifically how dare you sir how dare you
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Aug 14, 2023 21:25
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Ice Phisherman posted:have you ever thought for a single second about your parents needs and their needs alone, to the total exclusion of your own sanity and happiness
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Aug 14, 2023 21:45
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SardonicTyrant posted:This is not a good post to make in the mental health thread. 
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Aug 15, 2023 00:28
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skooma512 posted:Called my dad because I got a new video card and PC gaming was one of the few things to bond over. He didn't really care and instead the conversation went to trying to get me to not move away, and also to not married. Wonderful. Like, nobody in my family seems happy that I'm getting married, just clutching their pearls and yelling "What about me?" and "You owe us for having you", like if they had a genie wish they'd probably have me dump my fiance and move back into my old room so I can be their butler until literally they die. Absolutely move. Consider cutting off contact and giving your folks the double-bird. Definitely talk to a therapist if you haven't yet.
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Aug 15, 2023 00:40
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I think sometimes it can help to have the crazy thought mocked
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Aug 15, 2023 04:12
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SardonicTyrant posted:This is not a good post to make in the mental health thread. I'm sorry, I just wanted to keep it light. Sorry Skooma. I didn't mean to be mean or cruel.
Ice Phisherman has issued a correction as of 06:50 on Aug 15, 2023 |
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Aug 15, 2023 06:38
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all good, I might've been a bit snippy about it.
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Aug 15, 2023 11:57
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Ice Phisherman posted:
It's cool. I understood it was sarcasm. It still is pretty wild my dad is trying to talk me out of getting married solely because he doesn't want anything to change lmao. He even calls my fiance and such "my other family" that I'm neglecting them in favor of. Like dude do you not know marriage works? Or even relationships? I can't just firewall her mom out as much as I (and she!) would like to because they live together. He's even balked at me helping my aunt because he did the work of having a kid and not her so he's entitled to my labor exclusively.
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Aug 15, 2023 20:25
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skooma512 posted:It's cool. I understood it was sarcasm. it sounds like your dad is a dick
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Aug 15, 2023 20:28
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Your parents really are pieces of work unlike anything I've ever seen.
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Aug 15, 2023 20:48
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skooma512 posted:
What a loving rear end that guy sounds like. Just Lol and lmao at that dude
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Aug 15, 2023 21:00
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skooma512 posted:It's cool. I understood it was sarcasm. Unless you're a couple of weirdoes like me and my gf who love each other but prefer to keep separate spaces, you're going to find out that life and living get a lot easier once you have two people living and working together. And not just financially, but in having that base of support that they provide. Edit: Also gonna 3rd that your dad is absolutely demented. Zeroisanumber has issued a correction as of 21:56 on Aug 15, 2023 |
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Aug 15, 2023 21:53
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