UFOs are real

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redshirt: Aug 11, 2007

My UFO would have phasing and cloaks and shields and just relative light weapons that'd get the job done when needed.

# ? Sep 14, 2023 21:01

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# ? Jun 1, 2024 10:01

NoiseAnnoys: May 17, 2010

it�s amazing how uncool these true believer dorks make alien technology seem

# ? Sep 14, 2023 21:10

redshirt: Aug 11, 2007

WE HAVE 3 in 1 PRINTING/COPYING/FAXING technology, bitch!

# ? Sep 14, 2023 21:14

KrunkMcGrunk: Jul 2, 2007; Sometimes I sit and think, and sometimes I just sit.

Willatron posted:

Watched the NASA conference this morning about approaching UAPs with real science and data, which I think is great and I love it when scientists show up to ruin everybody's speculative fun about stuff.

NASA is only denying the Aliens exist because the Aliens asked NASA to pick up their bags of astronaut poo from the moon.

# ? Sep 14, 2023 21:17

temple: Jul 29, 2006; I have actual skeletons in my closet

UAP and disclosure is competition for Big Shuttle.

# ? Sep 14, 2023 21:35

CelticPredator: Oct 11, 2013; 🍀👽🆚🪖🏋

# ? Sep 15, 2023 01:15

PoPcornTG: Mar 26, 2007; Dogs day afternoon; Bleak Gremlin

THIS IS AN OUTRAGE! I was going to eat that Mummy Alien!

# ? Sep 15, 2023 01:26

fcc compliant bob: Jan 15, 2006; The must un-fantastic avitar on the forum (guranteed!)

I'm pretty sure Bob Lazar was never threatened or harassed by the government

# ? Sep 15, 2023 01:48

Wee: Dec 16, 2022; by Fluffdaddy

KrunkMcGrunk posted:

NASA is only denying the Aliens exist because the Aliens asked NASA to pick up their bags of astronaut poo from the moon.

NASA knows UFO's aren't from space, because NASA wouldn't go to space if there were UFO's or aliens in space. NASA are cowards.

# ? Sep 15, 2023 01:55

Funky See Funky Do: Aug 20, 2013; STILL TRYING HARD

Wee posted:

NASA knows UFO's aren't from space, because NASA wouldn't go to space if there were UFO's or aliens in space. NASA are cowards.

Totally. Think of all the crazy outrageous worlds in our very own system. What has NASA gone to visit? One that's nothing but rocks and dust. What's the next one they're aiming for? Nothing but red rocks and dust. After that, having run out of nearby really big dusty rocks to check out, they're going to move on to small dusty rocks. We have dusty rocks on earth!

# ? Sep 15, 2023 02:01

redshirt: Aug 11, 2007

Funky See Funky Do posted:

Totally. Think of all the crazy outrageous worlds in our very own system. What has NASA gone to visit? One that's nothing but rocks and dust. What's the next one they're aiming for? Nothing but red rocks and dust. After that, having run out of nearby really big dusty rocks to check out, they're going to move on to small dusty rocks. We have dusty rocks on earth!

Let me tell you about this mission to Callisto!

# ? Sep 15, 2023 02:26

Overdog: Jul 12, 2023; by CVG
(and can't post for 10 years!)

Jupiter has breathable air. :dukedog:

# ? Sep 15, 2023 02:30

DiomedesGodshill: Feb 21, 2009

Overdog posted:

Jupiter has breathable air.

Technically this is correct.

# ? Sep 15, 2023 02:32

redshirt: Aug 11, 2007

DiomedesGodshill posted:

Technically this is correct.

Any air is breatheable for some short time.

# ? Sep 15, 2023 02:41

Jippa: Feb 13, 2009

# ? Sep 15, 2023 05:53

GABA ghoul: Oct 29, 2011

mediaphage posted:

yeah my point is that there�s not as much money in the field - unless you�re being a super obvious scammer who charges for conferences and apps to contact aliens - as detractors would suggest

i mean how much was ya boy graves actually paid for this

I think you are seriously underestimating how lucrative the conspiracy grift has become. Like, take qanon for example: I remember someone tried to estimate how much money the qanon shaman made with his ~100 page ghostwritten "book" on Amazon and it was in the four figures range per month. If Grusch does this right, he's basically set for life and won't have to ever work again.

Looks like he is currently still in the pre-revenue stage going around podcast and other media, but a book will probably be coming sooner or later to start monetization. From there, the world of grift is your oyster.

# ? Sep 15, 2023 09:52

mediaphage: Mar 22, 2007; Excuse me, pardon me, sheer perfection coming through

GABA ghoul posted:

I think you are seriously underestimating how lucrative the conspiracy grift has become. Like, take qanon for example: I remember someone tried to estimate how much money the qanon shaman made with his ~100 page ghostwritten "book" on Amazon and it was in the four figures range per month. If Grusch does this right, he's basically set for life and won't have to ever work again.

Looks like he is currently still in the pre-revenue stage going around podcast and other media, but a book will probably be coming sooner or later to start monetization. From there, the world of grift is your oyster.

perhaps. but i don�t think the ufo grift has become anything close to a household name like that dude which is more of what i was getting on. just about everyone knows about the seditious q anon fucker and half of republicans think he�s a hero.

nobody outside of someone who has a passing interest in ufos (regardless of what side you come down on) knows who david grusch is. i still don�t think it comes close to what he could make as an ex- military dude with a ts clearance somewhere in the mic which makes the circumstances around his losing it more interesting for me

# ? Sep 15, 2023 11:08

GABA ghoul: Oct 29, 2011

Lmao, the UFOs subreddit is in complete mental meltdown mode about the NASA report. Like, there is all this fantastic evidence of aliens on the internet(just type UFO into Google image search!) but the rubes/gangsters at NASA are just refusing to acknowledge it! Defund NASA, make them pay back their wages, charge them for false testimony! NASA is the most corrupt organization on the planet!

I don't think I have ever felt so betrayed about anything in my life like these people are about this report.

# ? Sep 15, 2023 11:13

mediaphage: Mar 22, 2007; Excuse me, pardon me, sheer perfection coming through

GABA ghoul posted:

Lmao, the UFOs subreddit is in complete mental meltdown mode about the NASA report. Like, there is all this fantastic evidence of aliens on the internet(just type UFO into Google image search!) but the rubes/gangsters at NASA are just refusing to acknowledge it! Defund NASA, make them pay back their wages, charge them for false testimony! NASA is the most corrupt organization on the planet!

I don't think I have ever felt so betrayed about anything in my life like these people are about this report.

yeah they�re very upset specifically about the plane video which apparently the report even says is fairly vague estimate because they didn�t include wind speed or something? either way hoo

# ? Sep 15, 2023 11:25

Rad-daddio: Apr 25, 2017

Reddit dorks give way too much credit to NASA for being able to cover things up.

I think they have to dig around in the couch to find money for each satellite launch. How would they have the time or resources to cover up visits from an advanced spacefaring civilization?

# ? Sep 15, 2023 12:40

Bug Squash: Mar 18, 2009

loving imaging trying to keep the 10000 dorks at NASA quite about the most exciting thing in history. They'll talk your ear off about loving Lagrangian points if you let them, they can't be contained.

# ? Sep 15, 2023 12:43

mediaphage: Mar 22, 2007; Excuse me, pardon me, sheer perfection coming through

Bug Squash posted:

loving imaging trying to keep the 10000 dorks at NASA quite about the most exciting thing in history. They'll talk your ear off about loving Lagrangian points if you let them, they can't be contained.

# ? Sep 15, 2023 13:16

naem: May 29, 2011

so alien enthusiasts are a bit much and insist all kinds of very specific things exist based on no to very little evidence and jump to conclusions and it�s like religion and an identity at this point

BUT skeptics are also like, just as weird about it and their identity is that there aren�t aliens, and one could land and shake their hand and say �hello here are your free hoverboots and atomic fusion earthling� and they�d still deny it

both sides seem to be completely irrational

# ? Sep 15, 2023 15:11

Bug Squash: Mar 18, 2009

naem posted:

so alien enthusiasts are a bit much and insist all kinds of very specific things exist based on no to very little evidence and jump to conclusions and it’s like religion and an identity at this point

BUT skeptics are also like, just as weird about it and their identity is that there aren’t aliens, and one could land and shake their hand and say “hello here are your free hoverboots and atomic fusion earthling” and they’d still deny it

both sides seem to be completely irrational

Peak Enlightened Centrist mindset

# ? Sep 15, 2023 15:18

Cthulu Carl: Apr 16, 2006

naem posted:

BUT skeptics are also like, just as weird about it and their identity is that there aren�t aliens, and one could land and shake their hand and say �hello here are your free hoverboots and atomic fusion earthling� and they�d still deny it

I know right? Like how many grainy videos of weird lights will satisfy these so-called 'skeptics' that Mars does in fact need women?

# ? Sep 15, 2023 15:36

Snowglobe of Doom: Mar 30, 2012; sucks to be right

mediaphage posted:

perhaps. but i don�t think the ufo grift has become anything close to a household name like that dude which is more of what i was getting on. just about everyone knows about the seditious q anon fucker and half of republicans think he�s a hero.

nobody outside of someone who has a passing interest in ufos (regardless of what side you come down on) knows who david grusch is. i still don�t think it comes close to what he could make as an ex- military dude with a ts clearance somewhere in the mic which makes the circumstances around his losing it more interesting for me

Yeah there's always been hoaxers and bandwagoneers who jump onto the latest woo trend and they do it for a whole variety of reasons, there's no single explanation for their behaviour. Sometimes it's an attempted grift right from the start (there's a long LONG history of these fakers touring their 'discoveries' around the country and charging admission at state fairs so people could gawk at it) and sometimes they just do it for shits & giggles, like the crop circle fakers. Sometimes an attempted hoax takes on a life of its own and the truth isn't revealed until many many decades later:

Snowglobe of Doom posted:

Ivan T. Sanderson has his fingerprints all over this stuff, his name just keeps popping up over and over and over. The word 'cryptozoology' was first seen in print in Belgian zoologist Bernard Heuvelmans' 1955 book Sur la Piste des B�tes Ignor�es but he attributes Sanderson with coining the term in the 1940s. Sanderson got a real reputation as an intrepid explorer and monster investigator and he occasionally got called him in when there was a mystery to be solved, such as the 1948 Clearwater Beach Giant Penguin case. Giant three toed footprints were found along the beach short and a nearby river bank and mystified the town, and when Sanderson was called in to figure it out he announced it was definitely a gigantic penguin and there was no way the footprints could have been faked due their depth and stride. Here's a photo of Sanderson holding a plaster cast of one of the footprints:

Soon after there were several reported sightings of the giant penguin, which described it as being 15' tall and having alligator feet.

Decades later, long after Sanderson had died, a local newspaper reporter revealed that the tracks had been created by two local pranksters who just attached heavy iron monster feet onto their shoes

It turns out that they'd been trying to create a dinosaur hoax but Sanderson derailed it when he told everyone it was a giant penguin.

Bigfoot started out as a similar prank back in '58 when workers discovered giant footprints around a logging camp and a local reporter ran a story about it:

.... and the culprit wasn't revealed until almost half a century later when his family gave the game away after he died

Of course, sometimes the explanation for a hoax is just plain mental illness. :shrug:

# ? Sep 15, 2023 15:59

Vakal: May 11, 2008

Aliens need to be real because who else is going to return to me my father who went out for smokes and was abducted when I was seven years old.

# ? Sep 15, 2023 16:00

Rad-daddio: Apr 25, 2017

Snowglobe of Doom posted:

Yeah there's always been hoaxers and bandwagoneers who jump onto the latest woo trend and they do it for a whole variety of reasons, there's no single explanation for their behaviour. Sometimes it's an attempted grift right from the start (there's a long LONG history of these fakers touring their 'discoveries' around the country and charging admission at state fairs so people could gawk at it) and sometimes they just do it for shits & giggles, like the crop circle fakers. Sometimes an attempted hoax takes on a life of its own and the truth isn't revealed until many many decades later:

Bigfoot started out as a similar prank back in '58 when workers discovered giant footprints around a logging camp and a local reporter ran a story about it:

.... and the culprit wasn't revealed until almost half a century later when his family gave the game away after he died

Of course, sometimes the explanation for a hoax is just plain mental illness.

Lmao the origin of all cryptozoology is just bored dudes having fun in the wilderness.

# ? Sep 15, 2023 16:02

KrunkMcGrunk: Jul 2, 2007; Sometimes I sit and think, and sometimes I just sit.

Cthulu Carl posted:

I know right? Like how many grainy videos of weird lights will satisfy these so-called 'skeptics' that Mars does in fact need women?

bro, there's a entire DOCUMENTARY about how easy Earth girls are, and who could've made a doc like that, except aliens???

# ? Sep 15, 2023 16:06

Snowglobe of Doom: Mar 30, 2012; sucks to be right

Rad-daddio posted:

Lmao the origin of all cryptozoology is just bored dudes having fun in the wilderness.

It also ties back into the old "fearsome critters" folklore that lumberjacks used to invent such as hoop snakes, snallygasters, glawuckas, goofus birds, agropelters, etc etc.. Bored dudes have been making up tall tales about weird critters hiding in the American woods for centuries, and some of them turned into jokey folkore that gets sold as tourist souvenirs (jackalopes, etc) and some turn into bizarre national obsessions (bigfoot, dogmen, aliens, etc)

The hodag was an interesting case, it started out as a pretty obvious tall tale and featured in several Paul Bunyan stories but it briefly crossed over into cryptozoology territory in the 1890s until those spoilsport nerds at The Smithsonian rained on everyone's parade:

quote:

In 1893, newspapers reported the discovery of a hodag in Rhinelander, Wisconsin. The articles claimed the hodag had "the head of a frog, the grinning face of a giant elephant, thick short legs set off by huge claws, the back of a dinosaur, and a long tail with spears at the end". The reports were instigated by well-known Wisconsin land surveyor, timber cruiser and prankster Eugene Shepard, who rounded up a group of local people to capture the animal. The group reported that they needed to use dynamite to kill the beast.

A photograph of the remains of the charred beast was released to the media. It was "the fiercest, strangest, most frightening monster ever to set razor sharp claws on the earth. It became extinct after its main food source, all white bulldogs, became scarce in the area."

Shepard claimed to have captured another hodag in 1896, and this one was captured alive. According to Shepard's reports, he and several bear wrestlers placed chloroform on the end of a long pole, which they worked into the cave of the creature where it was overcome.

He displayed this hodag at the first Oneida County fair. Thousands of people came to see the hodag at the fair or at Shepard's display in a shanty at his house. Having connected wires to it, Shepard would occasionally move the creature, which would typically send the already-skittish viewers fleeing the display.

As newspapers locally, statewide, and then nationally began picking up the story of the apparently remarkable living creature, a small group of scientists from the Smithsonian Institution in Washington, D.C. announced they would be traveling to Rhinelander to inspect the apparent discovery. Their mere announcement spelled the end, as Shepard was then forced to admit that the hodag was a hoax.

# ? Sep 15, 2023 16:25

ThinkTank: Oct 23, 2007

naem posted:

so alien enthusiasts are a bit much and insist all kinds of very specific things exist based on no to very little evidence and jump to conclusions and it’s like religion and an identity at this point

BUT skeptics are also like, just as weird about it and their identity is that there aren’t aliens, and one could land and shake their hand and say “hello here are your free hoverboots and atomic fusion earthling” and they’d still deny it

both sides seem to be completely irrational

your house belongs to me I have the deed. If you need further proof I would be happy to take a blurry cellphone video recording of it from across the road. I ask that you vacate the premises immediately. Thank you.

# ? Sep 15, 2023 16:57

syntaxfunction: Oct 27, 2010

naem posted:

so alien enthusiasts are a bit much and insist all kinds of very specific things exist based on no to very little evidence and jump to conclusions and it’s like religion and an identity at this point

BUT skeptics are also like, just as weird about it and their identity is that there aren’t aliens, and one could land and shake their hand and say “hello here are your free hoverboots and atomic fusion earthling” and they’d still deny it

both sides seem to be completely irrational

Kind of weird that you think there's a binary belief system here. Like there's no middle ground of "you all sound insane and keep promoting obvious hoaxes please provide actual concrete evidence" or "I believe in aliens but I wouldn't cite encounters as proof or support the endeavours of a lot of obsessives" I guess?

Very "atheists and religious people are both bad, unlike me who is smart and good" energy.

# ? Sep 15, 2023 17:05

GABA ghoul: Oct 29, 2011

naem posted:

BUT skeptics are also like, just as weird about it and their identity is that there aren�t aliens, and one could land and shake their hand and say �hello here are your free hoverboots and atomic fusion earthling� and they�d still deny it

Yeah, ok, I guess that could be the case(I don't really get much exposure to internet alien talk, outside of sa) But is there anyone itt who fits that description? I think everyone here would be psyched about alien life. What is the correct reaction to seeing those ridiculous Mexican mummy props or reading the Las Vegas forklift alien story, if not "lmao"?

# ? Sep 15, 2023 17:19

Shinjobi: Jul 10, 2008; Gravy Boat 2k

How dummy thicc do you think the real aliens that exist will be

Asking for a friend

# ? Sep 15, 2023 17:19

Snowglobe of Doom: Mar 30, 2012; sucks to be right

Shinjobi posted:

How dummy thicc do you think the real aliens that exist will be

Asking for a friend

According to Uri Geller and Whitney Streiber they have tiny bony asses but the phattest pussy you've ever seen. Like, shockingly large pussies that will make you question everything you thought you knew

Snowglobe of Doom posted:

Eyyyy, there's that grussy that everyone's been talking about

# ? Sep 15, 2023 17:29

Vakal: May 11, 2008

Shinjobi posted:

How dummy thicc do you think the real aliens that exist will be

Asking for a friend

It's entirely possible that our entire universe is located inside a giant alien's butt.

So the answer to that is, very.

# ? Sep 15, 2023 17:29

redshirt: Aug 11, 2007

I want to believe

# ? Sep 15, 2023 17:33

Brain Curry: Feb 15, 2007; People think that I'm lazy
People think that I'm this fool because
I give a fuck about the government
I didn't graduate from high school