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Hippo goes ham on truck. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dg-D9OWO-X8
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Oct 9, 2023 02:06
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A hippo's skin is up to 2 inches thick but underneath that they're almost pure muscle layered over incredibly thick bones. They might look like big ol' chubbos but they actually have very little body fat.
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Oct 9, 2023 07:38
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Hippos kill more people every year than just about any other living creature*, they are hella territorial and move fast. * I think mosquitoes got them beat for spreading malaria and such.
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Oct 9, 2023 09:38
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By popular demand posted:Hippos kill more people every year than just about any other living creature*, they are hella territorial and move fast. We need to get past this mosquito slander. The mosquitos don't kill anyone.
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Oct 9, 2023 10:20
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Aramoro posted:We need to get past this mosquito slander. The mosquitos don't kill anyone. Don't listen to their lies! A mosquitos shot my parents.  I dress up at night as a bat to put fear in the heart of mosquito criminals. Which is all of them. 
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Oct 9, 2023 10:26
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Deer kill a lot of people.
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Oct 9, 2023 11:50
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When we say an animal kills someone it has to have hate in its heart when it does it. Like Hippos. People running over deer and getting killed in the process doesn't count.
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Oct 9, 2023 11:58
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Aramoro posted:When we say an animal kills someone it has to have hate in its heart when it does it. Like Hippos. Deer knowingly sacrifice themselves in their ongoing attempt to remove humanity from this planet. Very respectable creatures.
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Oct 9, 2023 12:10
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Those hippos are hungry, hungry alright. Hungry for blood.
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Oct 9, 2023 12:59
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Snowglobe of Doom posted:A hippo's skin is up to 2 inches thick but underneath that they're almost pure muscle layered over incredibly thick bones. They might look like big ol' chubbos but they actually have very little body fat. Hippo trivia: A fully grown hippo's hide can weigh nearly half a ton in total. While not literally armored like a rhino is, a hippo's hide is almost impenetrable to lions. Bite power champions like hyenas and crocodiles might be a different story. Hippos definitely have fat (it helps make them more buoyant in water, among other things), but less than e.g. bears, seals or domesticated pigs.
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Oct 9, 2023 13:04
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Also their skulls look like they came out of a WH40K ork 
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Oct 9, 2023 13:14
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By popular demand posted:Hippos kill more people every year than just about any other living creature*, they are hella territorial and move fast. They don't, they're not "the most dangerous animal in Africa" in that they kill very many people, it's that when they do attack a person it's extremely likely that that person's gonna die Nile crocodiles, snakes, lions, all kill more people, but the vast majority of people who get attacked by them live. Hippos not so much
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Oct 9, 2023 13:29
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You would at least agree they are leading the charts on the "most harmless looking yet actually killer", I mean Drop Bears are just a joke Australians have.
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Oct 9, 2023 13:32
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Snowglobe of Doom posted:Also their skulls look like they came out of a WH40K ork I saw a story about a camel tearing a dude's head off and was confused until I looked the motherfucker's skull up  Deceitful rear end eyelashes
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Oct 9, 2023 13:33
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I'd hit the hippo on its weak point, they eyeball, then apply all of my aura on a single point of my body into a perfect strike to the solar plexus, knocking it unconscious.
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Oct 9, 2023 13:34
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I would just sidestep it as it charges, then karate chop it in half.
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Oct 9, 2023 13:36
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Only tactic ever succeed against a hippo is running like the bejeezus and hope it just gives up as again, they fast.
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Oct 9, 2023 13:37
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I would simply dive head first into it's mouth and get it over with quickly.
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Oct 9, 2023 13:44
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Most of this dude made it https://7news.com.au/lifestyle/real-life/i-was-swallowed-by-a-hippo-and-ripped-apart-pauls-story-of-survival-defies-belief-c-5553718 No wildly good tips? Witnesses said he was screaming so loud and so highly pitched that the hippo got freaked out and left
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Oct 9, 2023 13:54
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Suleman posted:Hippo trivia: Hyenas will try to go through the thinner skin (the anal area) of a dead hippo, because trying to get through the thick skin is really tough. But once there's a hole in the skin, everything goes through it and it gets bigger and bigger. Rotting hippo carcasses are some of the worst smelling things around. Considering both the amount of rotting animal matter, and that they spend their whole life basically stewing in their own poo poo. It's not uncommon for hippo pools, (which is so disgusting full of poo poo and bacteria and a lack of oxygen) to cause large fish kills when they get flooded in to the river.
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Oct 9, 2023 15:55
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Just imagine what America could have been, if Robert Broussard got his wish... https://www.smithsonianmag.com/history/how-the-us-almost-became-a-nation-of-hippo-ranchers-180982244/
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Oct 9, 2023 16:10
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More like Hipp-OH NO!
Desert Bus has a new favorite as of 22:15 on Oct 9, 2023 |
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Oct 9, 2023 22:12
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I'm assuming that part of the danger of hippos is their very rough shark like skin.
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Oct 9, 2023 22:32
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I think it’s the shrek ears
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Oct 9, 2023 23:33
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By popular demand posted:You would at least agree they are leading the charts on the "most harmless looking yet actually killer", I mean Drop Bears are just a joke Australians have. Mate, drop bears are no joke.
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Oct 10, 2023 00:16
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Oh god that just reminded me, drop bear seasons is about to start again. poo poo.
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Oct 10, 2023 00:39
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Hippos ftw
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Oct 10, 2023 00:39
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Didn't think hippos could be any cooler, but after learning they wallow about covered in poo poo, piss and bacteria all day, hell,verbal enema posted:Hippos ftw
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Oct 10, 2023 13:59
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Biplane posted:Didn't think hippos could be any cooler, but after learning they wallow about covered in poo poo, piss and bacteria all day, hell, Living their best lives, meanwhile we're all going about deluding ourselves!
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Oct 10, 2023 14:03
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They also just whip their poo poo all around with their tails. because they can.
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Oct 10, 2023 14:04
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Look sure, at this point I think we all know none of us well ever be as cool as the noble hippo, do we really need to keep rubbing it in!!!
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Oct 10, 2023 14:04
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You can't take my dreams away! I will develop into a beautiful horse of the river!
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Oct 10, 2023 14:06
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DandyLion posted:Living their best lives, meanwhile we're all going about deluding ourselves! Really makes you think about what's truly important in life.
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Oct 10, 2023 14:12
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Before hippos fight they poo poo. The hippo that shits the most always wins the fight, buoyed up by his own stench. Just like goons
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Oct 10, 2023 15:37
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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TiVsCzRJKaY
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Oct 10, 2023 15:54
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yaffle posted:Before hippos fight they poo poo. The hippo that shits the most always wins the fight, buoyed up by his own stench. This is why inciting a fight is known as "starting poo poo"
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Oct 10, 2023 21:00
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Uh oh, poo poo's going down!
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Oct 10, 2023 21:09
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WithoutTheFezOn posted:Uh oh, poo poo's going down! also left and right!!!
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Oct 10, 2023 22:05
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WithoutTheFezOn posted:Uh oh, poo poo's going down! I'm yelling shitter
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Oct 11, 2023 01:15
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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hzwZeoJGQ_4 I assume the first one is real? I kept expecting the fart
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Oct 11, 2023 01:17
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