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euphronius
Feb 18, 2009

Watching to old shows George wasn’t even fat haha he was just round

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haljordan
Oct 22, 2004

the corpse of god is love.






euphronius posted:

Watching to old shows George wasn’t even fat haha he was just round

Hey, it was the early 90s. The Simpsons portrayed Homer as some sort of king sized fat rear end when he weighed 239 pounds.

adebisi lives
Nov 11, 2009

Chicken Butt posted:

Hmm … in the Pixar Inside Out model of consciousness, which emotion’s color would that particular Core Memory orb be?

I don't watch kids movies

haljordan
Oct 22, 2004

the corpse of god is love.






Mr Lance Murdock posted:

During the 90's heydeys of the show and the stock market boom there was a bunch of money being tossed around to have ANY association with the show. Especially in NYC. People were paying Stuttering John 10k just to play a round of golf. I know DIal a Dancer got lots of finance bros hiring them(Think Sal) I dont think he had any ownership in Dial a Dancer or bangbangshow but was getting paid to plug them from the company.
Ive always maintained Bengy is a secret multi-millionaire who has been hording away money for almost 30 years.

Remember when that Elisa broad was so desperate for any kind of fame that she leeched onto Benjy like a barnacle? Her pretending like she genuinely had feelings for that guy was the best acting job she'll ever do, by a wide margin.

haljordan fucked around with this message at 20:16 on Dec 7, 2023

MaoistBanker
Sep 11, 2001

For Sound Financial Pranning!
Of course, the greatest assembly of bridge trolls to evaluate women ended up not evaluating any women at all.

FABRIC. FABRIC. YOU GO TO BARNEY'S FOR SUITS. WHERE DO YOU GET A BLUE T-SHIRT? WHERE?!

Only registered members can see post attachments!

Lifespan
Mar 5, 2002
"I bet you got a beige computer" is still the funniest insult.

haljordan
Oct 22, 2004

the corpse of god is love.






Lifespan posted:

"I bet you got a beige computer" is still the funniest insult.

That is definitely an all-timer, it's been stuck in my head since the first time I heard it years and years ago.

haljordan fucked around with this message at 20:59 on Dec 7, 2023

Bonzo
Mar 11, 2004

Just like Mama used to make it!
My ex-wife (around 1998) wanted us to go to NYC and have Ralph evaluate her. It was around that time I realized I did not marry a stable person.

haljordan
Oct 22, 2004

the corpse of god is love.






Bonzo posted:

My ex-wife (around 1998) wanted us to go to NYC and have Ralph evaluate her. It was around that time I realized I did not marry a stable person.

Do you guys remember in Private Parts how there was that one couple with Gary shooting promos and the man was berating the woman (sitting in their car) for refusing to get nude like she said she would? Do you think that was a real couple, and if so, are they still together today?

haljordan fucked around with this message at 21:07 on Dec 7, 2023

Bonzo
Mar 11, 2004

Just like Mama used to make it!
Yes
Yes
No...but probably yes

Squashy Nipples
Aug 18, 2007

Bonzo posted:

My ex-wife (around 1998) wanted us to go to NYC and have Ralph evaluate her. It was around that time I realized I did not marry a stable person.

My girlfriend knows almost nothing about the show, so when I mentioned Ralph's death, she went and read the mainstream press about him.

"Well, he sounds like he was a very nice man, Howard and Beth seem to love him very much."


hmmmmmmm. not quite.

The sadist in me really needed to correct this, so I went ahead and told her about The Evaluators. She was shocked. Didn't really believe me until I googled up some excerpts:

quote:

Three Women Get Evaluated. 8/13/98. 9:00am
Three women came in to get evaluated by Howard and three judges. The judges for today's evaluation were Ralph the fag, Ronnie the limo driver and King of all Blacks.

...

Ralph wasn't so impressed and picked her apart a bit. I didn't hear him give her a number though. Ralph said she had stubby legs, hair all over her body, bad feet and a few other things.

The only way her brain could process that was, "These women *wanted* this? The subjected themselves to this humiliation on purpose? Then it's a BDSM scene."

1glitch0
Sep 4, 2018

I DON'T GIVE A CRAP WHAT SHE BELIEVES THE HARRY POTTER BOOKS CHANGED MY LIFE #HUFFLEPUFF

haljordan posted:

Do you guys remember in Private Parts how there was that one couple with Gary shooting promos and the man was berating the woman (sitting in their car) for refusing to get nude like she said she would? Do you think that was a real couple, and if so, are they still together today?

No Jackie and Nancy broke up.

Squashy Nipples
Aug 18, 2007

drat, some real gems from that week:

quote:

Bob Guccione Calls In. 8/12/98. 9:10am
The king of Penthouse Magazine, Bob Guccione, called in to promote the September issue of the mag. ...
66 year old Bob is now dating a 30 year old woman. Howard heard that she's like the best looking woman in the world. Bob told a long story about how Penthouse ended up beating Playboy in sales after just a few years being out. Right now Penthouse is the second largest selling magazine. The best selling magazine is TV Guide. Howard suggested that Penthouse add tv listings to their magazine to boost sales over that of TV Guide. Bob thought that was a pretty funny idea..

Best selling magazine is TV Guide... well, that didn't last much longer after 1998.


quote:

WANTED: FREAKS. 8/11/98. 9:20am
If you're a freak and you want to be in the opening for the new CBS tv show then call 212-975-9002. Howard put out the word that they're taping the opening for the new CBS show and they need freaky people to appear in it. The auditions are tomorrow (Wednesday August 12) from 9am to noon. The actual taping will take place next Monday. Average people need not apply.

-- Monday August 10, 1998 --

New Studio Set For CBS TV Show. 8/10/98. 6:05am
Howard mentioned that they have a new setup in the studio for the upcoming ''The Howard Stern Radio Show'' CBS TV show. He said it looks very professional now. He didn't explain exactly what it included but did mention that there's a couch in there. The new show starts on August 22.

Remember the CBS Show? What a trainwreck, but at least it got us the couch set up that he still uses.


quote:

What's The Deal With Ralph?. 8/10/98. 8:15am
A 12 year old caller brought up an interesting subject this morning...Ralph's relationship with actress Terry Farrell. Terry used to star on ''Deep Space 9'' and Ralph managed to get a date with her. The only problem was that she lives out in California and Ralph lives in New Jersey. Well this kid was wondering if Ralph was still talking to her. That led to a 40 minute discussion with Ralph about whether or not he's gay. Ralph said that he still talks to Terry but he's not rushing out to California to have sex with her. Howard and the gang spent way too much time talking to homo boy Ralph. Ralph figures that if he wants to get laid he can just stay on the east coast and do it. So to sum it up, Ralph is just friendly with Terry Farrell and if he wants to get laid he can stay in Jersey.

From the period when Ralph was denying it.

Bonzo
Mar 11, 2004

Just like Mama used to make it!
I'm shocked Reddit hasn't come up with a rumor that Howard and Ralph had a thing

MrMidnight
Aug 3, 2006

More memories of our snaggle tooth doofus from the rest of the staff

https://youtu.be/thQqSIsu5gs?si=NZGlhU3K7vbtkuMe

1glitch0
Sep 4, 2018

I DON'T GIVE A CRAP WHAT SHE BELIEVES THE HARRY POTTER BOOKS CHANGED MY LIFE #HUFFLEPUFF

Bonzo posted:

I'm shocked Reddit hasn't come up with a rumor that Howard and Ralph had a thing

I think they both could do better.

Bonzo
Mar 11, 2004

Just like Mama used to make it!
Ralph was on the phone as 9/11 was happening. I remember him saying something like, "Oh wow! I'm going up to my roof to check it out!" and at that point no one knew it was a jet.

the first one

MaoistBanker
Sep 11, 2001

For Sound Financial Pranning!

MrMidnight posted:

More memories of our snaggle tooth doofus from the rest of the staff

https://youtu.be/thQqSIsu5gs?si=NZGlhU3K7vbtkuMe

not to get all ralph but jon hein still holding on to that hair shave it bro

wesleywillis
Dec 30, 2016

SUCK A MALE CAMEL'S DICK WITH MIRACLE WHIP!!

haljordan posted:

Do you guys remember in Private Parts how there was that one couple with Gary shooting promos and the man was berating the woman (sitting in their car) for refusing to get nude like she said she would? Do you think that was a real couple, and if so, are they still together today?

I feel like that happened with a real couple. But when she refused, on camera, Howard probably saw that and was like "gently caress them, hire two actors to portray that, but don't give these two poo poo". Footage of the real couple was destroyed while the two actors got paid a token sum, and the real couple probably watched the movie, saw that and was pissed.

haljordan
Oct 22, 2004

the corpse of god is love.






wesleywillis posted:

I feel like that happened with a real couple. But when she refused, on camera, Howard probably saw that and was like "gently caress them, hire two actors to portray that, but don't give these two poo poo". Footage of the real couple was destroyed while the two actors got paid a token sum, and the real couple probably watched the movie, saw that and was pissed.

Holy crap, you're right! It was an actress named Carrie Flaska. There's a disturbingly detailed write-up on her on the Mr. Skin website.

beep by grandpa
May 5, 2004

MrMidnight posted:

More memories of our snaggle tooth doofus from the rest of the staff

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=thQqSIsu5gs

jfc for a radioshow that's been on 100 years why is this like by far and away the saddest i have ever felt listening to it

Sand Monster
Apr 13, 2008

Bonzo posted:

I'm shocked Reddit hasn't come up with a rumor that Howard and Ralph had a thing

That speculation probably predates Reddit.

haljordan
Oct 22, 2004

the corpse of god is love.






beep by grandpa posted:

jfc for a radioshow that's been on 100 years why is this like by far and away the saddest i have ever felt listening to it

Chris crying about watching a movie with Ralph hit me hard, not gonna lie.

Lifespan
Mar 5, 2002

haljordan posted:

There's a disturbingly detailed write-up on her on the Mr. Skin website.

I mean, I think that's the point of that site. The guy who ran it calling (to Howard and other shows) was beyond loving creepy.

some bust on that guy
Jan 21, 2006

This avatar was paid for by the Silent Majority.

adebisi lives posted:

I'll always remember my early days of Stern consumption - watching the E show in my college dorm and thinking "wow this gay guy with the laser pointer is vicious, I don't see any cellulose on that ladies thigh!"

He was such a great heel. Someone who you immediately hated but couldn't turn it off because he was so entertaining how he got under everyone's skin. The Simon Cowell of those stripper segments in the late 90s. I'm only realizing now how under appreciated he was in his entertainment value

Szyznyk
Mar 4, 2008

Lifespan posted:

I mean, I think that's the point of that site. The guy who ran it calling (to Howard and other shows) was beyond loving creepy.

You must have issues with skintimacy.

Lifespan
Mar 5, 2002
At 45 minutes and 32 seconds you can see rear burger for 2 frames!

Former Human
Oct 15, 2001

Bonzo posted:

I'm shocked Reddit hasn't come up with a rumor that Howard and Ralph had a thing

Half of what they post is conspiracy theories and other MAGA chud crap. Within hours of Ralph's passing there were at least three threads I saw claiming Ralph died from being vaccinated.

Lifespan posted:

I mean, I think that's the point of that site. The guy who ran it calling (to Howard and other shows) was beyond loving creepy.

Dude was super gross but the weirdest thing is when he tried to convince everyone that middle aged, droopy boobs were the hottest and genuinely didn't understand when no one knew what he was talking about.

Bonzo
Mar 11, 2004

Just like Mama used to make it!
Sometimes I feel like the end of the world there will be Artie, High Pitch Eric, and Jeff the Drunk left standing

Mr Lance Murdock
Feb 29, 2008

Bones heal. Chicks dig scars. And the United States of America has the best doctor-to-daredevil ratio in the world

some bust on that guy posted:

He was such a great heel. Someone who you immediately hated but couldn't turn it off because he was so entertaining how he got under everyone's skin. The Simon Cowell of those stripper segments in the late 90s. I'm only realizing now how under appreciated he was in his entertainment value

Yah he knew how to work and could make a quick heel turn out of nowhere.

Bonzo posted:

Sometimes I feel like the end of the world there will be Artie, High Pitch Eric, and Jeff the Drunk left standing

Jeff and High Pitch are like Cockroaches and will be here long after we are all gone.

I hate to say it about Artie but I think he is just holding on till his mother is gone....after that I wont give him 6 months.

haljordan
Oct 22, 2004

the corpse of god is love.






Jeff the Drunk just needs some cigarettes and beer, he'll definitely live to be 95.

Shes Not Impressed
Apr 25, 2004


haljordan posted:

Jeff the Drunk just needs some cigarettes and beer, he'll definitely live to be 95.

It's not dementia, it's a blister!

Bonzo
Mar 11, 2004

Just like Mama used to make it!
I was going to include Bigfoot in that list but I bet he's more nature now than human.

Chicken Butt
Oct 27, 2010
Half of Jeff’s rear end rotted off, he hasn’t been sober a single day since his teens, and his lifestyle could charitably be called “sub-sedentary”. The fucker is immortal.

Bonzo
Mar 11, 2004

Just like Mama used to make it!
Wasn't there a big controversy about Ralph at dinner stealing the cash on the table that was meant for the tip?

Two Kings
Nov 1, 2004

Get the scientists working on the tube technology, immediately.
https://youtu.be/cn9lrrrE9fs?si=icD5lRaFbLjOGzbd

He allegedly stole $100 cash tip off the table at Las Vegas Nobu.

And stole $100 during a card game on the Private Jet to Las Vegas.

Complete scumbag move and Ralph did a very poor job defending himself.

Sand Monster
Apr 13, 2008

Two Kings posted:

https://youtu.be/cn9lrrrE9fs?si=icD5lRaFbLjOGzbd

He allegedly stole $100 cash tip off the table at Las Vegas Nobu.

And stole $100 during a card game on the Private Jet to Las Vegas.

Complete scumbag move and Ralph did a very poor job defending himself.

Howard meekly trying to feign ignorance to the whole thing was infuriating.

Lifespan
Mar 5, 2002
Ralph's whole defense was "you know I don't need that money and it's really messed up you said that." As opposed to a bunch of people that just saw him do it.

wesleywillis
Dec 30, 2016

SUCK A MALE CAMEL'S DICK WITH MIRACLE WHIP!!
ROBIN I WAS ABOUT TO SEND RYAN O'NEAL A NOTE!!!

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Zoben
Oct 3, 2001

Lifespan posted:

At 45 minutes and 32 seconds you can see rear burger for 2 frames!
Furburgerage

Bonzo posted:

I'm shocked Reddit hasn't come up with a rumor that Howard and Ralph had a thing
Oh, they've been doing that one for years. I admit to being on Reddit a lot more than SA these days since I don't read GBS and the only two threads I post in are really slow. There are plenty of cool redditors and plenty of gigantic shitheads. Stern does have a lot of MAGA fans (I'd imagine a bit older in general), hater fans, and straight-up rumor mill fans. The biggest allegations:

- Howard wears a wig -- I agree that his hair looks really loving weird

- Ralph and Howard were/are both gay and in a homosexual relationship

- Beth is a former prostitute

There are one or two jackoffs arguing that Ralph died due to the COVID vaccine but they get downvoted to hell so their comments get hidden. Anyway, RIP to the man who's rather catch than pitch, because he (was :( ) Howard's bitch, and his name was Ralphiecaaaaaaakes

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