Comic Strips 2023: It's not a fetish or anything, I swear

The Something Awful Forums > The Finer Arts > BSS: Bisexual Super Son > Comic Strips 2023: It's not a fetish or anything, I swear

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Selachian: Oct 9, 2012

Crab Dad posted:

Filthy loving randos trying to handle your baby the first couple months is annoying. Church was the worst. Think we went once in the first couple months.

I was in a hotel lobby with my daughter a couple months after she was born. She'd been crying a bit and it was around feeding time, so I sat down and started going through the diaper bag for fixings for a bottle, and a complete loving stranger picked her up out of my lap and informed me that she was hungry. Somehow I managed to avoid committing homicide on the spot.

Pogo 12/31/51 - 1/2/52

Punchie 1/10-12/49

Tom Corbett, Space Cadet 12/17-19/51

Selachian fucked around with this message at 00:24 on Dec 19, 2023

# ? Dec 19, 2023 00:19

Adbot: ADBOT LOVES YOU

# ? Jun 4, 2024 16:31

Kennel: May 1, 2008; BAWWW-UNH!

Into Ilves

Nancy

Dustin

Mandrake

# ? Dec 19, 2023 00:25

The_Other: Dec 28, 2012; Welcome Back, Galaxy Geek.

Kennel posted:

Dustin

So I guess Kelley is just stopping the "Dustin Christmas Carol" with no denouement.

# ? Dec 19, 2023 00:32

Caphi: Jan 6, 2012; INCREDIBLE

The only moral was Dustin bad.

# ? Dec 19, 2023 00:34

Vox Valentine: May 31, 2013; Solving all of life's problems through enhanced casting of Occam's Razor. Reward yourself with an imaginary chalice.

The Continued Adventures Of Institutional Racism

Rudolph Lazuto Says Hello

# ? Dec 19, 2023 01:07

Hwurmp: May 20, 2005

has any human consumed fruitcake in the last three decades

# ? Dec 19, 2023 01:16

Ghostlight: Sep 25, 2009; maybe for one second you can pause; try to step into another person's perspective, and understand that a watermelon is cursing me

every year

# ? Dec 19, 2023 01:20

Haifisch: Nov 13, 2010; Objection! I object! That was... objectionable!; Taco Defender

Darthemed posted:

I've seen Phantasmo, but has anyone seen his pants?

# ? Dec 19, 2023 01:30

Kazinsal: Dec 13, 2011

Scary Go Round (October 1-5, 2004)

First appearance: Bob Crowley, occultist beyond time and space, and apparently the wickedest man in all London.

# ? Dec 19, 2023 01:33

EasyEW: Mar 8, 2006; I've got my father's great big six-shooter with me 'n' if anybody in this woods wants to start somethin' just let 'em--but they DASSN'T.

Hwurmp posted:

has any human consumed fruitcake in the last three decades

One on order right now.

Out Our Way At Christmas (December 13, 20, 24, 1927)

Our Boarding House (December 22-24, 1924)

Out Our Way: The School Ma'am Saga (December 23, 1924)

Toonerville Folks (March 6-8, 1922)

THE TOONERVILLE TROLLEY THAT MEETS ALL THE TRAINS: Of all the many queer causes for delay along the line, a high wind blowing crossways over the Goose Crick Trestle is probably the most reasonable and justified.

FAMILY STUFF: Dad has never been able to convince brother Will that he didn't furnish the screwdriver the day Little Egbert took the saxophone to pieces.

VERNON MCNUTT: That was a very heartless thing for Vernon McNutt to yell at the Big Fellow who couldn't sit down on the park bench.

Dok's Dippy Duck Hunt (January 13, 1915)

Little Lefty, in which Marmaduke reconsiders his stance on collective bargaining. (August 7-9, 1939)

# ? Dec 19, 2023 01:33

Hwurmp: May 20, 2005

Haifisch posted:

I've seen Phantasmo, but has anyone seen his pants?

the story of Pantasmo is covered in a separate series

# ? Dec 19, 2023 01:36

PainterofCrap: Oct 17, 2002; hey bebe

maybeadracula posted:

next week: The Trojan Jackass

lol

I was just starting to warm up to the guy, too

# ? Dec 19, 2023 01:46

Vox Valentine: May 31, 2013; Solving all of life's problems through enhanced casting of Occam's Razor. Reward yourself with an imaginary chalice.

PainterofCrap posted:

The Urge To Kill.

# ? Dec 19, 2023 01:48

Bruceski: Aug 21, 2007; The tools of a hero mean nothing without a solid core.

Hostile V posted:

The Urge To Kill.

My thought was "okay Val, you're in on the act too, right? You're not supposed to ACTUALLY stab him."

# ? Dec 19, 2023 02:16

Malachite_Dragon: Mar 31, 2010; Weaving Merry Christmas magic

Giant Ethicist posted:

We Are Reproducing

Is �you shouldn't take babies outside the house for a couple months after they�re born because their immune system isn�t developed� just Japanese conventional wisdom, or a real thing?

"Talk to your doctor first! Unless he says something you don't agree with, then ignore that motherfucker and just do whatever you want."

Bruceski posted:

My thought was "okay Val, you're in on the act too, right? You're not supposed to ACTUALLY stab him."

... not stab him *yet*, anyway...

# ? Dec 19, 2023 02:34

EBB: Feb 15, 2005

EasyEW posted:

VERNON MCNUTT: That was a very heartless thing for Vernon McNutt to yell at the Big Fellow who couldn't sit down on the park bench.

Guess they already had the anti-human architecture back then

# ? Dec 19, 2023 02:36

Technowolf: Nov 4, 2009

Hwurmp posted:

the story of Pantasmo is covered in a separate series

Phatassmo

# ? Dec 19, 2023 02:36

Pigsfeet on Rye: Oct 22, 2008; I'm meat on the hoof

EasyEW posted:

If dad could have been born 30 years after 1943, he could have been Romeo Rose, who apparently was 39 in 2013

# ? Dec 19, 2023 02:58

Professor Wayne: Aug 27, 2008; So, Harvey, what became of the giant penny?

They actually let him keep it.

Pickles

Hagar the Horrible

Zits

# ? Dec 19, 2023 03:01

Tiggum: Oct 24, 2007; Your life and your quest end here.

The_Other posted:

Steeple 19: Maggie's Party Part 2

I don't see any antimacassars. :confused:

Hwurmp posted:

has any human consumed fruitcake in the last three decades

Yep. It's one of the best cakes, honestly. The meme about it being bad and everyone hating it is extremely weird.

# ? Dec 19, 2023 03:50

Ghostlight: Sep 25, 2009; maybe for one second you can pause; try to step into another person's perspective, and understand that a watermelon is cursing me

they are the small pieces of cloth hanging over the arms of the couch that are coloured the same as the couch for some reason (this may be a british thing)

# ? Dec 19, 2023 03:59

Tiggum: Oct 24, 2007; Your life and your quest end here.

Ghostlight posted:

they are the small pieces of cloth hanging over the arms of the couch that are coloured the same as the couch for some reason (this may be a british thing)

I thought that was just the arms of the couch. It still looks like it's just the couch to me. They're perfectly square and look solid, not like a loose piece of cloth at all.

Also, I thought antimacassars were specifically the things that go on the headrest of a couch (or chair) (as frequently depicted in The Dinette Set):

# ? Dec 19, 2023 04:15

Stultus Maximus: Dec 21, 2009; USPOL May

Tiggum posted:

I don't see any antimacassars.

Yep. It's one of the best cakes, honestly. The meme about it being bad and everyone hating it is extremely weird.

Have you ever had a mass produced one? They can be... not good.
Made at home and properly soaked in brandy or whiskey? Excellent.

# ? Dec 19, 2023 04:23

Cowslips Warren: Oct 29, 2005; What use had they for tricks and cunning, living in the enemy's warren and paying his price?; Grimey Drawer

BRING ON THE TROJAN JACKASS.

Boltar would see the wooden jackass and decide to ride it.

# ? Dec 19, 2023 04:28

Julet Esqu: May 6, 2007

Luann

Gil Thorp

Without question she should be allowed to wear a head covering during sports, but I think that specific one has potential to be a problem for her with wrestling what with all the dangly bits. They do make special hijabs for athletics. She should look into that.

Home Free

# ? Dec 19, 2023 04:29

Murdstone: Jun 14, 2005; I'm feeling Jimmy

Tiggum posted:

I thought that was just the arms of the couch. It still looks like it's just the couch to me. They're perfectly square and look solid, not like a loose piece of cloth at all.

Also, I thought antimacassars were specifically the things that go on the headrest of a couch (or chair) (as frequently depicted in The Dinette Set):

I thought the same but I googled and apparently those arm covers count as well. I assume it was because people would lie on the couch with their heads on them.

F Minus

This is a brilliant idea.

Mark Trail

Mary Worth

The Phantom

Pooch Cafe

Rex Morgan MD

Andertoons

You may be thinking you saw this one before. That is because you did. It was from November 30. I don't know why they're republishing it today.

Apartment 3-G

# ? Dec 19, 2023 05:32

Zereth: Jul 9, 2003

Murdstone posted:

Rex Morgan MD

Please please please let him be dead, a mob hitman finally caught up to him or something.

Yeah I know he's just gonna be gone, but remember when he had to suddenly bail (as in "leaving out the window") on teaching the Morgans' daughter art because somebody caught up with him? What if that's finally coming home to roost and then he'll be dead and incapable of appearing in future storylines

# ? Dec 19, 2023 05:43

Vox Valentine: May 31, 2013; Solving all of life's problems through enhanced casting of Occam's Razor. Reward yourself with an imaginary chalice.

I'm not a huge fan of vegan cheese replacements because frankly what I need them for is to either melt real nice or accentuate the meal in a flavor way and I either find them too nutty or too mild. I also hate cheesecake because I hate cream cheese. That being said I cannot imagine how the cheesecake would end up being like Play-Doh; the sort of vegan cheese replacement you'd need for a cheesecake is gonna be a very soft thing to add and you need the baking and the setting in the fridge to square it away so it's got structure. I know it's an art shorthand but it straight up looks like they're just eating Faux Brie/Camembert full of berries and not really cheesecake per se so. I dunno! I am giving this way more thought than they did for this Blue Bloods-rear end writing but like. My brother's a vegan and I think he sucks but there's a lot of perfectly fine vegan cooking, even with stuff that's not just using faux alternatives. Stuff like Wacky Cake or aquafaba meringues (honestly my favorite meringues) or loving Oreos. I don't have high hopes for this storyline that has frankly outstayed its welcome even if I want Sonia to own her dad into the form of a corncob but man if it could end with them exploring like actually good vegan food because it turned out that Brad was a suckass poser and whathisnuts makes an effort to meet his daughter halfway in this arena and actually gives a poo poo about cooking, that'd be great and infinitely better than "well he was a troop, better fall in line".

# ? Dec 19, 2023 05:51

Kammat: Feb 9, 2008; Odd Person

Zereth posted:

Please please please let him be dead, a mob hitman finally caught up to him or something.

Yeah I know he's just gonna be gone, but remember when he had to suddenly bail (as in "leaving out the window") on teaching the Morgans' daughter art because somebody caught up with him? What if that's finally coming home to roost and then he'll be dead and incapable of appearing in future storylines

I'm still amazed they let him out in the first place. Among all the other charges isn't there that little attempted murder bit on the cruise ship?

# ? Dec 19, 2023 05:53

someone awful.: Sep 7, 2007

another soylent ingredient

we really are supposed to be sympathizing with the lovely cop here, huh

# ? Dec 19, 2023 05:54

Woapalanne: Jul 23, 2007; This account paid for by BJ.

someone awful. posted:

another soylent ingredient

we really are supposed to be sympathizing with the lovely cop here, huh

Under a better writer, I'd think they're both strawmen and we're supposed to think they both suck. But no, we're probably supposed to be siding with the cop.

# ? Dec 19, 2023 06:00

Julet Esqu: May 6, 2007

Kammat posted:

I'm still amazed they let him out in the first place. Among all the other charges isn't there that little attempted murder bit on the cruise ship?

Well, he said he was sorry!

# ? Dec 19, 2023 06:33

readingatwork: Jan 8, 2009; Hello Fatty!; Fun Shoe

Crabgrass

Big Nate

# ? Dec 19, 2023 06:40

Haifisch: Nov 13, 2010; Objection! I object! That was... objectionable!; Taco Defender

1981 comics

wiki posted:

Howard William Cosell was an American sports journalist, broadcaster and author. Cosell became prominent and influential during his tenure with ABC Sports from 1953 until 1985.

Cosell was widely known for his blustery, confident personality.[1] Cosell said of himself, "I've been called arrogant, pompous, obnoxious, vain, cruel, verbose, a showoff. And, of course, I am." Cosell was sardonically nicknamed "Humble Howard" by fans and media critics.[2] In its obituary for Cosell, The New York Times described Cosell's effect on American sports coverage:

He entered sports broadcasting in the mid-1950s, when the predominant style was unabashed adulation, [and] offered a brassy counterpoint that was first ridiculed, then copied until it became the dominant note of sports broadcasting.

Dick Tracy

Footrot Flats

The Lockhorns

Computoon: Origins

Haifisch fucked around with this message at 06:58 on Dec 19, 2023

# ? Dec 19, 2023 06:56

Bruceski: Aug 21, 2007; The tools of a hero mean nothing without a solid core.

Zereth posted:

Please please please let him be dead, a mob hitman finally caught up to him or something.

Yeah I know he's just gonna be gone, but remember when he had to suddenly bail (as in "leaving out the window") on teaching the Morgans' daughter art because somebody caught up with him? What if that's finally coming home to roost and then he'll be dead and incapable of appearing in future storylines

I'm holding out for faking his death, though I'm not sure how that'd play out with the witnesses not being in on it. Amazingly lifelike mannequin? I think "killed someone similar-looking" isn't gonna fly in this comic.

# ? Dec 19, 2023 07:07

Strontium: Aug 28, 2009; Dexter didn't much care for the party.

Daddy Daze

Take It From The Tinkersons

Macanudo

Dark Side Of The Horse

# ? Dec 19, 2023 07:18

NRVNQSR: Mar 1, 2009

Bruceski posted:

I'm holding out for faking his death, though I'm not sure how that'd play out with the witnesses not being in on it. Amazingly lifelike mannequin? I think "killed someone similar-looking" isn't gonna fly in this comic.

I'm pretty sure no-one in this strip is a doctor, it'd be fine.

# ? Dec 19, 2023 07:54

Tiggum: Oct 24, 2007; Your life and your quest end here.

Stultus Maximus posted:

Have you ever had a mass produced one? They can be... not good.

I mean, anything can be not good. But I've bought and eaten fruitcake before. It was good. I'm not really in the habit of eating sweet stuff so I can't say I've made a habit of it, but on the rare occasion I'm in the mood for cake, fruitcake is one of the safer options.

Bruceski posted:

I'm holding out for faking his death, though I'm not sure how that'd play out with the witnesses not being in on it. Amazingly lifelike mannequin? I think "killed someone similar-looking" isn't gonna fly in this comic.

Suicide note saying he's going to throw himself off a cliff into the sea. He could even pay someone to say they saw him heading in that direction.

# ? Dec 19, 2023 08:06

Howard Beale: Feb 22, 2001; It's like this, Peanut

NRVNQSR posted:

I'm pretty sure no-one in this strip is a doctor, it'd be fine.

Doctor, hell, Kitty Cop should come in for this case.

# ? Dec 19, 2023 08:11

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# ? Jun 4, 2024 16:31

Safety Dance: Sep 10, 2007; Five degrees to starboard!

Tiggum posted:

I mean, anything can be not good. But I've bought and eaten fruitcake before. It was good. I'm not really in the habit of eating sweet stuff so I can't say I've made a habit of it, but on the rare occasion I'm in the mood for cake, fruitcake is one of the safer options.

Seconding this. I like fruitcake okay. I _love_ it if it's home made with a considerable amount of rum.

# ? Dec 19, 2023 08:15

The Something Awful Forums > The Finer Arts > BSS: Bisexual Super Son > Comic Strips 2023: It's not a fetish or anything, I swear

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