funny politics shit you remember: The Maltese Failson

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > C-SPAM > funny politics shit you remember: The Maltese Failson

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Animal-Mother: Feb 14, 2012; RABBIT RABBIT
RABBIT RABBIT

bedpan posted:

also the 2016 election iirc

"I don't feel no ways tarred..."

# ? Jan 1, 2024 01:01

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# ? May 23, 2024 08:02

Mr. Lobe: Feb 23, 2007; ... Dry bones...

the milk machine posted:

Hillary's chocolate chip cookie recipe

What's the story here

# ? Jan 1, 2024 01:05

Malleum: Aug 16, 2014; Am I the one at fault? What about me is wrong?; Buglord

rush limbaugh's month long never trump experimentation and all the libs tripping over themselves to fellate him for it

# ? Jan 1, 2024 01:06

ikanreed: Sep 25, 2009; I honestly I have no idea who cannibal[SIC] is and I do not know why I should know.

syq dude, just syq!

the milk machine posted:

Hillary's chocolate chip cookie recipe

A whole cup of shortening for 1 cup of flour?

Jesus Christ, why not just roll a stick of butter in sugar and eat it off the floor.

# ? Jan 1, 2024 01:07

Fortaleza: Feb 21, 2008

Rush Limbaugh threatening to move out of NYC if they raised taxes and absolutely nobody giving a poo poo

Later when his apartment was listed it made its way around the internet thanks to how shockingly ugly it was

# ? Jan 1, 2024 01:08

KOTEX GOD OF BLOOD: Jul 7, 2012

kelly posted this while limbaugh was still alive

# ? Jan 1, 2024 01:09

the milk machine: Jul 23, 2002; lick my keys

Mr. Lobe posted:

What's the story here

https://www.wbur.org/npr/490478924/cooked-up-after-a-hillary-clinton-gaffe-the-first-spouse-cookie-battle-is-back

quote:

Although Family Circle magazine's quadrennial presidential cookie competition sounds like it might have started with Mamie Eisenhower back in the 1950s, it actually got its start with Hillary Clinton.

...

But this isn't so much a story about cookies as it is a story about Hillary Clinton. Back in 1992, Hillary Clinton was something of an oddity, a political spouse with her own high-powered career, who hadn't set it aside to stand by her husband when Bill Clinton became governor of Arkansas. Her career became an issue in the Democratic primary. There were questions about whether then-Gov. Bill Clinton had funneled state business into her law firm.

When asked about her career in a press gaggle, Clinton responded, "You know, I suppose I could have stayed home and baked cookies and had teas, but what I decided to do was to fulfill my profession, which I entered before my husband was in public life. And I tried very, very hard to be as careful as possible, and that's all that I can tell you."

The uproar was almost immediate. Her comments were taken as a slight against stay-at-home moms and women who did have time to make cookies, and catapulted her into controversy.

# ? Jan 1, 2024 01:10

bedpan: Apr 23, 2008

feel like hillary's real likes and interests, same as other of her class, involves roasting people alive, injustice, destruction, etc.

The 120 Days of Sodom was an accurate depiction of what the elite practices and how they think and feel

# ? Jan 1, 2024 01:11

HashtagGirlboss: Jan 4, 2005

Rush Limbaugh sobbing on air when he realized he was going to die and none of his money or influence could change that

# ? Jan 1, 2024 01:11

the milk machine: Jul 23, 2002; lick my keys

It�s time to admit Hillary Clinton is an extraordinarily talented politician

# ? Jan 1, 2024 01:11

Fortaleza: Feb 21, 2008

Not a funny thing but speaking of politicians and recipes I once made LBJ's favorite recipe for texas style chili (aka a "bowl of red") and it was loving amazing

# ? Jan 1, 2024 01:13

Mister Bates: Aug 4, 2010

Dwight Eisenhower�s beef stew recipe is sized to feed like 50 people and at the end he�s like �I guess you can make it smaller but I�ve never actually tried so I don�t know if it will be any good�

# ? Jan 1, 2024 01:38

projecthalaxy: Dec 27, 2008; Yes hello it is I Kurt's Secret Son

General Eisenhower’s Old-Fashioned Beef Stew
For 60 portions, use the following ingredients:
20 pounds good meat (prime round)
8 pounds small Irish potatoes
6 bunches small carrots
5 pounds small onions
15 fresh tomatoes
1 bunch bouquet garniture
3 gallons beef stock
Salt, pepper, and Accent

Stew the meat until tender. Add the vegetables and bouquet garniture (thyme, bay leaves, garlic, etc. in cloth bag). When vegetables are done, strain off 2 gallons of stock from the stew and thicken slightly with beef roux. Pour back into stew and let simmer for one-half hour.

To adapt above recipe to average family use (6 portions), use one-tenth of the ingredients
listed. This would be approximately as follows:
2 pounds good meat (prime round)
1 pound small Irish potatoes
1 bunch small carrots
¾ pound small onions
2 fresh tomatoes
Assorted spices
2 ½ pints beef stock
Salt, pepper, and Accent
Cook as in above recipe, straining off 1 cup of stock from stew instead of the 2 gallons.
It must be emphasized that the recipe using these portions has not been tested.

# ? Jan 1, 2024 01:49

Dokapon Findom: Dec 5, 2022; They hated Futanari because His posts were shit.

Accent is just MSG, add it to make literally anything taste good

# ? Jan 1, 2024 01:53

Kitfox88: Aug 21, 2007; Anybody lose their glasses?

she's electable if you vote for her

# ? Jan 1, 2024 01:56

StashAugustine: Mar 24, 2013; Do not trust in hope- it will betray you! Only faith and hatred sustain.

Nixon ate cottage cheese with ketchup

# ? Jan 1, 2024 02:12

bedpan: Apr 23, 2008

StashAugustine posted:

Nixon ate cottage cheese with ketchup

and pineapple

# ? Jan 1, 2024 02:16

Javid: Oct 21, 2004

rush limbaugh died

# ? Jan 1, 2024 02:17

Kitfox88: Aug 21, 2007; Anybody lose their glasses?

StashAugustine posted:

Nixon ate cottage cheese with ketchup

bedpan posted:

and pineapple

Nixon: (Muttering) Jesus Christ�

# ? Jan 1, 2024 02:18

One More Fat Nerd: Apr 13, 2007; Mama’s Lil’ Louie; Nap Ghost

Chronicles posted:

the most hosed up thing is someone found evidence that she actually was doing that in the 90s and it still seems fake

One of Clinton's many problems as a candidate is that a combination of a lack of personal charisma and an extremely saturated public image meant that everything she did was viewed as inauthentic, even if it wasn't.

# ? Jan 1, 2024 02:18

Dokapon Findom: Dec 5, 2022; They hated Futanari because His posts were shit.

Looks pretty good!

# ? Jan 1, 2024 02:20

Private Cumshoe: Feb 15, 2019; AAAAAAAGAGHAAHGGAH

ikanreed posted:

Jesus Christ, why not just roll a stick of butter in sugar and eat it off the floor.

It's what She's wanted of us all along...

# ? Jan 1, 2024 02:22

Second Hand Meat Mouth: Sep 12, 2001

# ? Jan 1, 2024 02:57

Horseshoe theory: Mar 7, 2005

ikanreed posted:

A whole cup of shortening for 1 cup of flour?

Jesus Christ, why not just roll a stick of butter in sugar and eat it off the floor.

Hillary learned from the Master, Paula Deen.

# ? Jan 1, 2024 03:07

the milk machine: Jul 23, 2002; lick my keys

Javid posted:

rush limbaugh died

# ? Jan 1, 2024 03:20

Weka: May 5, 2019; Can't post for 19 hours!

Dokapon Findom posted:

Accent is just MSG, add it to make literally anything taste good

Oh I figured it meant you were supposed to mutter frenchly while you cooked which I am sure would improve the flavour

# ? Jan 1, 2024 06:42

projecthalaxy: Dec 27, 2008; Yes hello it is I Kurt's Secret Son

Dokapon Findom posted:

Accent is just MSG, add it to make literally anything taste good

MSG? didn't realize eisenhower was in league with RED CHINA

# ? Jan 1, 2024 06:45

Milo and POTUS: Sep 3, 2017; I will not shut up about the Mighty Morphin Power Rangers. I talk about them all the time and work them into every conversation I have. I built a shrine in my room for the yellow one who died because sadly no one noticed because she died around 9/11. Wanna see it?

projecthalaxy posted:

MSG? didn't realize eisenhower was in league with RED CHINA

Big Eisenhower W

# ? Jan 1, 2024 07:37

Mr. Sharps: Jul 30, 2006; The only true law is that which leads to freedom. There is no other.

KOTEX GOD OF BLOOD posted:

kelly posted this while limbaugh was still alive

lol the cancer ray gets me every time

# ? Jan 1, 2024 09:42

H.P. Hovercraft: Jan 12, 2004; one thing a computer can do that most humans can't is be sealed up in a cardboard box and sit in a warehouse; Slippery Tilde

thanks obama

# ? Jan 1, 2024 09:49

mawarannahr: May 21, 2019

lol'd irl

# ? Jan 1, 2024 09:51

FirstnameLastname: Jul 10, 2022

H.P. Hovercraft posted:

thanks obama

# ? Jan 1, 2024 10:47

ben shapino: Nov 22, 2020

lol

# ? Jan 1, 2024 10:52

Orange Devil: Oct 1, 2010; Wullie's reign cannae smother the flames o' equality!

The libs have never been ok.

# ? Jan 1, 2024 11:34

Kazzah: Jul 15, 2011; Formerly known as
Krazyface; Hair Elf

Mr. Sharps posted:

lol the cancer ray gets me every time

sorry brother

# ? Jan 1, 2024 11:35

KORNOLOGY: Aug 9, 2006

H.P. Hovercraft posted:

thanks obama

# ? Jan 1, 2024 12:20

Animal Friend: Sep 7, 2011

H.P. Hovercraft posted:

thanks obama

but did the calves cramp?

# ? Jan 1, 2024 12:22

Lin-Manuel Turtle: Jul 12, 2023

# ? Jan 1, 2024 12:31

Ruffian Price: Sep 17, 2016

One More Fat Nerd posted:

One of Clinton's many problems as a candidate is that a combination of a lack of personal charisma and an extremely saturated public image meant that everything she did was viewed as inauthentic, even if it wasn't.

hot sauce in your bag always felt right at home with other deranged rich person habits, like the way mitt romney does... anything. makes sense beyonce would reference hillary in her "with my status I'm detached from the common man now" verse

# ? Jan 1, 2024 12:45

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# ? May 23, 2024 08:02

DACK FAYDEN: Feb 25, 2013; Bear Witness

"lemon. wet. good."

although I have to admit I have described a fall vista as "where the trees are just the right height" and had nobody bat an eyelash at it so maybe I shouldn't have made fun of him for that one, it's actually very poetic in a garrison keillor sort of way

oh man that guy's a sex pest I just remembered that

# ? Jan 1, 2024 14:03

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > C-SPAM > funny politics shit you remember: The Maltese Failson

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