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Can I borrow a cup of sugar? I’m trying to get a humming bird to drink out of my penis
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Dec 19, 2023 04:42
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You can't ask a bird not to fly. You can't ask a fish not to swim. You can't ask a tiger not to turn back into a Chinese dude at midnight.
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Dec 27, 2023 03:08
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It's after six. What am I, a farmer?
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Dec 27, 2023 05:56
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I’m Pete Hornberger, the last time I tried to put myself out there the girl turned out to be a cop
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Dec 29, 2023 03:43
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Stop eating people's old french fries, pigeon. Have some self respect - don't you know you can fly?
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Dec 29, 2023 04:14
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How do you know all these Indigo Girls songs?
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Dec 30, 2023 02:19
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Popo popped dookie down by the vacants.
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Dec 30, 2023 08:51
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BANJO!
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Jan 3, 2024 21:26
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PANTS! PANTS! PANTS!
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Jan 4, 2024 05:06
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Jimbone Tallshanks posted:PANTS! PANTS! PANTS! Chocolate Chocolate Chocolate! Ack!
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Jan 4, 2024 05:37
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Did you kill those doves? No, I bought them at the dead dove store. Grow up, Liz.
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Jan 4, 2024 21:46
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Bill Cosby, you got a lotta nerve gettin' on the phone with me after what you did to my Aunt Paulette!
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Jan 5, 2024 04:40
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'Cause I remember the girl, and it's impossible. I never got out of my car, and she never got all the way out of her tollbooth.
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Jan 5, 2024 05:38
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The G Train, Nermal!
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Jan 5, 2024 15:33
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Did you just try to control my body with your white hand?
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Jan 5, 2024 15:39
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These are my lawyers; one is German, one is Japanese…and you don’t bring these guys together to play patty cake.
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Jan 6, 2024 02:11
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My kindergarten teacher was a former black panther.
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Jan 6, 2024 13:38
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GoutPatrol posted:My kindergarten teacher was a former black panther. This reminds me of one of my favorite ever cutaway jokes, from the episode where Liz's smell reminds Tracy of his father. https://i.imgur.com/pJ9MgCf.mp4
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Jan 7, 2024 02:16
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You knew when Sonny was coming over, cause she would take us to the store and buy two steaks and a bottle of Nair with cocoa butter.
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Jan 7, 2024 06:57
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More business juice please!
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Jan 13, 2024 23:47
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*Gets slapped in the face by Pete* *Mouths "I know."*
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Jan 14, 2024 01:03
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“Hey Pete, you smoke weed right? Yeah, me neither. Me and you Pete, me and you.”
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Jan 17, 2024 00:36
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That's racist! I'm not on crack - I'm straight-up mentally ill!
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Jan 17, 2024 02:14
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That's right, I steal dogs.
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Jan 17, 2024 03:31
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Five now dog five! Five now dog five!
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Jan 17, 2024 04:14
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Jimbone Tallshanks posted:Five now dog five! Five now dog five! running time 26 minutes
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Jan 17, 2024 06:09
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My single my single is dropping is dropping
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Jan 18, 2024 06:15
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No, I know you can say that, but what do I call you? Puerto Rican. Wow. That…does not sound right.
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Jan 18, 2024 14:22
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"You're So Vain" was, in fact, written... by me.
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Jan 19, 2024 06:49
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"Rodney, don't make me hit you with one of my Boom-Booms!"
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Jan 20, 2024 23:13
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Jamie Foxx. Flip Wilson. Whoopi Goldberg does it every day!
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Jan 21, 2024 03:27
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No, it's true. I've made mistakes. Sacrificed happiness for a job I don't think I'm ever going to get. We all have ways of coping. I use sex and awesomeness.
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Jan 21, 2024 04:47
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Pete, could you tell a bald eagle to stop scaring me at zoos?
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Jan 21, 2024 05:43
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*accidentally knocks over vial of Gay Bomb*
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Jan 21, 2024 06:41
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Eat This Glob posted:Bill Cosby, you got a lotta nerve gettin' on the phone with me after what you did to my Aunt Paulette! I don’t know if this joke aged badly or spectacularly or both
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Jan 21, 2024 14:54
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Gatto Grigio posted:I don’t know if this joke aged badly or spectacularly or both This joke was not written as a coincidence!
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Jan 21, 2024 16:04
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Leo Spaceman is a great physician... and a pretty good dentist.
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Jan 23, 2024 09:44
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Quotes aside, we're deep into a rewatch for the billionth time, and it's really impressive how even the episodes with uninteresting main plots are still quotable as gently caress. I wasn't very excited for Khonani as that plot was pretty weird even when it was a relevant joke, but it was just as quotable as most others. Likewise, Argus follows right after, but it's the introduction of Paul and Will Forte completely steals every scene even in his first appearance (as Paul). Ain't no party like a Liz Lemon party, cuz a Liz Lemon party is MANDATORY.
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Jan 23, 2024 20:44
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I hate to be the stereotypical man, but this is my home and I wanna wear this blouse.
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Jan 23, 2024 21:05
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| # ? Jun 4, 2024 16:00 |
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Ooga booga big, Ooga booga strong, I’m gonna sing my Ooga Booga Song.
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Jan 23, 2024 22:43
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