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ADBOT LOVES YOU
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May 29, 2024 00:56
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- The Voice of Labor
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the board game guess who? but with potatoes instead of faces or animals
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Dec 30, 2023 03:55
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- Bright Bart
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False. There is only one electron and it has never stopped
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A rap song against potatoes.
Or lines like 'Fried you up but you just kept dragging along/Now it's time to put you in the trash where you belong/And I see you're oh so loving pale/Have to slather you in that red stuff, yeah' but it isn't clear until the reveal that it's about a particular potato.
Maybe the potato is anthropomorphized juuust enough that it goes from silly/headscratching to actually disconcerting.
I'm getting upset just thinking about it. I really like potatoes.
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Dec 30, 2023 12:08
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- Karate Bastard
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Samwise the rapper
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Dec 30, 2023 16:04
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- Prurient Squid
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Tiddy cat Buddha improving your day.
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At first the man who hates potatoes seems to not actually know what potatoes are but then we realise that we are the ones who don't know.
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Dec 30, 2023 16:23
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- Drink-Mix Man
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You are an odd fellow, but I must say... you throw a swell shindig.
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Or maybe a sexy R&B song
Girl you got that skin so tasty and brown / gonna butter you up before I go down
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Dec 30, 2023 18:51
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- Prurient Squid
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Tiddy cat Buddha improving your day.
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Like this erotic video?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3Ed3ibbrPlM
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Dec 30, 2023 19:46
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- Drink-Mix Man
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You are an odd fellow, but I must say... you throw a swell shindig.
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It was missing something
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EvVhXwUCMXw
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Dec 31, 2023 01:39
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- Prurient Squid
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Tiddy cat Buddha improving your day.
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Much improved.
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Dec 31, 2023 09:55
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- Bright Bart
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False. There is only one electron and it has never stopped
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Movie credits that are just erroneous but make you second guess yourself.
Like an extra in a courtroom scene on trial for keying a car billed as 'Convicted Felon' and now you're wondering if you slept through a scene where he's actually found guilty and oh is keying a car a felony if it's an expensive one?
Maybe a holiday film where the kindly old man played by a known actor in a cameo is billed as 'Secret Elf Boy' and now you're re-winding to see if he had pointy ears.
Or Sidney Sweeney as the daughter in a family vacation film appearing as 'Drug Dealing Pimp' and you're like nooo but then realizing she had a few fur coats in her closet, a bunch of hundreds when she opened her wallet, and was said to work the nightshift and a mail order business on the side and you're like maaaybe?
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Dec 31, 2023 14:04
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- Karate Bastard
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Now you have me thinking about mail order pimps. Like maybe you need some pimping, but you can't source one locally
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Dec 31, 2023 14:10
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- Prurient Squid
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Tiddy cat Buddha improving your day.
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Bill an actor as "Himself" and it totally recontextualises the performance.
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Dec 31, 2023 14:54
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- Bright Bart
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False. There is only one electron and it has never stopped
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Bill an actor as "Himself" and it totally recontextualises the performance.
If you billed them as 'Himself but slightly younger' you'd be rewinding to see if they used some extra makeup or effects and failing that opening up their Wiki page to see what about their earlier life or work would inspire that depiction that the contemporary actor couldn't.
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Dec 31, 2023 15:03
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- Harold Fjord
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Ooh I like the idea that you only find out a movie is time travel in the credit when you find out that one of the characters is a future self. Like twelve monkeys but more so.
Thirteen monkeys.
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Dec 31, 2023 15:12
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- Prurient Squid
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Tiddy cat Buddha improving your day.
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Potatohead potentate.
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Jan 1, 2024 00:52
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- Prurient Squid
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Tiddy cat Buddha improving your day.
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Forget the Ego trip, get on the Id tobogan.
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Jan 1, 2024 16:17
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- Prurient Squid
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Tiddy cat Buddha improving your day.
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Starfleet's equivalent of Rule 34 but it's Protocol 34 or something.
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Jan 2, 2024 12:44
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- Bright Bart
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False. There is only one electron and it has never stopped
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It's some weird directive that an alien race has. First, they must come up with IP for the sole purpose of making porn of it. Second, they make the porn. Third, they wipe all traces of it from the internet and start anew.
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Jan 2, 2024 12:58
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- Bright Bart
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False. There is only one electron and it has never stopped
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It's also a cargo cult of a sort. The aliens reproduce by parthenogenesis and have no concenption of sexual intercourse or attraction.
But years ago an even more advanced Rick Sanchez type visitor came and had all these drawings of creatures and objects putting their things into other things/other things into their things. So now they dedicate a full tenth of their labour force to making these drawings in hopes of gaining access to the tech that will avert their looming environmental crisis. When one IP doesn't work they scrub it and start over.
Bright Bart fucked around with this message at 15:56 on Jan 2, 2024
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Jan 2, 2024 15:00
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- Prurient Squid
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Tiddy cat Buddha improving your day.
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The jokes on us when they eventually find the fetish that does, seemingly avert the crisis.
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Jan 2, 2024 15:03
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- Finger Prince
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The jokes on us when they eventually find the fetish that does, seemingly avert the crisis.
Somehow we always knew it was going to be furries.
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Jan 2, 2024 18:10
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- Bright Bart
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False. There is only one electron and it has never stopped
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One formula for a hit rap song is to choose something that's currently popular in some videos and then writing about how you do popular thing (and ideally how you've been doing popular thing for a long time).
See popping your collar, ghostriding the whip, spinning your chain, riding on spinners, hanging your chain low etc. etc.
Not really a joke so much as an obersvation but there you have it.
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Jan 3, 2024 13:13
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- Abugadu
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1st Sgt. Matthews and the men have Procured for me a cummerbund from a traveling gypsy, who screeched Victory shall come at a Terrible price. i am Honored.
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New Year, New God.
Goin with Quetzelcoatl this time around, got a good feeling about it. I mean Him. Or Her.
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Jan 3, 2024 13:16
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- Karate Bastard
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It's Odin for me.
Next up Freya.
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Jan 3, 2024 13:39
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- canyoneer
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I only have canyoneyes for you
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, my dudes.
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Jan 3, 2024 22:33
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- The Voice of Labor
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the hills are alive with the sound of mule ticks
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Jan 4, 2024 00:09
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- Bright Bart
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False. There is only one electron and it has never stopped
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No room to store an umbrella all year round? Find it wasteful to own one when you only need it a few times a year? Usually drive door-to-door but your car is in the shop? And is a big downpour on the horizon?
DRYBOX delivers an umbrella in your choice of style and color right to your door along with prepaid return packaging. Choose a new one each time to match your mood, you're not locked in! Just select a 3 day, 7 day, or 10 day rental and we'll do the rest.
How much does it cost? We'll pay YOU $10 a day, because I'm incomprehensibly wealthy and absolutely INSANE!
Bright Bart fucked around with this message at 15:51 on Jan 4, 2024
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Jan 4, 2024 13:25
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- Karate Bastard
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There is no porn of me on the Internet, therefore I am not.
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Jan 4, 2024 17:16
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- Prurient Squid
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Tiddy cat Buddha improving your day.
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The niche fetish porn that averts the destruction of the cosmos happens to be oomox gloryholes.
edit:
Now I'm trying to wrestle with the mechanics of oomox gloryholes. Like realistically you can only fit one ear at a time into the hole. Or do you stick half an ear into two holes and just hope for the best? Or maybe if there were two walls close together with two holes and you stick both your ears through at the same time?
edit2:
Now I'm imagining Quark going on an unhinged rant about how females will only oomox wearing latex gloves for protection, not like in the old days and how it ruins the experience.
Prurient Squid fucked around with this message at 11:57 on Jan 5, 2024
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Jan 5, 2024 11:17
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- Bright Bart
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False. There is only one electron and it has never stopped
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Schrödinger's Pornography
Until you search for "[your name]+Rule34" you don't know if there is any hentai made of you: there both is and isn't. Therefore, you don't know of you exist or not: you both do and do not.
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Jan 5, 2024 14:00
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- Prurient Squid
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Tiddy cat Buddha improving your day.
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The Nobel Prize for effort.
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Jan 5, 2024 21:36
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- Karate Bastard
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The Nobel Prize for effort.
Good Lord what is that man doing????
I have no idea but man is he doing a lot of it.
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Jan 6, 2024 00:00
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- Prurient Squid
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Tiddy cat Buddha improving your day.
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Going to bang dot com thinking it's going to be porn and a hand holding a gun emerges from your screen.
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Jan 6, 2024 19:42
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- The Voice of Labor
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mixing up the surfboard wax with the pube wax due to confusing marketing
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Jan 6, 2024 19:54
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- The Voice of Labor
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you have words of power that will grant you abilities far beyond those of mere mortals but they're a bunch of horrible slurs. you used them to stop a grocery store shooting. doing so made you the suspect and made it an instant hate crime. you used them again to escape prison, now prison guards and prison guard union people keep trying to get your autograph. you eventually just shrug your shoulders and use them to land yourself a seat on the u.s. senate
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Jan 6, 2024 22:11
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- Karate Bastard
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Turns out the slurs were never necessary, you just have tourettes. And were born on krypton.
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Jan 7, 2024 00:24
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- Adbot
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ADBOT LOVES YOU
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May 29, 2024 00:56
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- Snuff Melange
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______________
...some men,
you just can't reach.
______________
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My blood type is Apple-Bee, could that be something? Has anyone said that?
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Jan 7, 2024 01:44
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Dec 30, 2023 01:55
