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BalloonFish posted:I've seen that 'theory'. I've also seen flat earthers pick this up and use it to say "See, the Earth isn't as big as (((They))) say it is - planes don't need 200 tons of fuel to cross the oceans because they're not actually going round the back of the planet. Makes u think!" With a lot of conspiracy theories I can at least follow the lines and determine who’s supposed to benefit from this being true. Flat earth is one I can’t ever figure out the who or why. Who benefits? Who is the “they” in “what they aren’t telling you”?
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Jan 15, 2024 23:56
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Techno Remix posted:With a lot of conspiracy theories I can at least follow the lines and determine who’s supposed to benefit from this being true. Nearly every Flat Earther I've ever encountered is also Biblical Literalist type Christian, so it's usually attributed to an attempt to make people disbelieve the Bible and so not be Real True Christians(tm). Most of the time they'll admit the connection, sometimes they try to pretend it's not and it's just pure scientific truth unrelated to their religious beliefs. E: So the answer to your question is that "they" are evil secular humanists who serve the Devil.
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Jan 16, 2024 00:44
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I liked the one where they openly admit that it's because they're terrified of just being on a pale blue dot. It's a continuation of evolution = I'm not a monkey! And heliocentrism, the age of the earth, climate change, germ theory. Basically anything that uses statistical analysis over a long period of time or records is a Marxist plot, to reduce us to cattle and you should just trust your own eyes and ears and Bronze Age book, because they're terrified of not being the most important thing in the universe and also terrified of other people.
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Jan 16, 2024 00:54
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Guavanaut posted:I liked the one where they openly admit that it's because they're terrified of just being on a pale blue dot. It's the same reason why believing we're in some kind of end times is popular no matter who stands to benefit from it or doesn't. It's scary to think that one day you'll be gone and everyone who knew you will be gone, and yet the world will be going along in blissful ignorance of all you ever did and were. Even if it's not the literal end of the world, at least you can be from one of those big important periods everyone thinks about. It's like being one of those dinosaurs that died in a bog a thousand years before the asteroid, no one's going to even romanticize the anonymous idea of you.
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Jan 16, 2024 01:43
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Killer robot posted:It's the same reason why believing we're in some kind of end times is popular no matter who stands to benefit from it or doesn't. It's scary to think that one day you'll be gone and everyone who knew you will be gone, and yet the world will be going along in blissful ignorance of all you ever did and were. Even if it's not the literal end of the world, at least you can be from one of those big important periods everyone thinks about. It's like being one of those dinosaurs that died in a bog a thousand years before the asteroid, no one's going to even romanticize the anonymous idea of you. These people who want to be important and remembered for eternity clearly never said "You too" when a waitron said "Enjoy your meal".
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Jan 16, 2024 01:51
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I think at the other end there's also the popular myth of the start times, a time when we all lived in harmony with nature and everything was nice and peaceful. David Icke, Alex Jones, and Bob Moran all love poo poo like that. Not enough to stop writing nonsense and live in a tree instead, but enough for them to react by throwing any sources that reject that onto the list of cabal deep-state illuminati, while entertaining any crank who affirms them while adding some extra lizards.
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Jan 16, 2024 02:03
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Killer robot posted:It's the same reason why believing we're in some kind of end times is popular no matter who stands to benefit from it or doesn't. It's scary to think that one day you'll be gone and everyone who knew you will be gone, and yet the world will be going along in blissful ignorance of all you ever did and were. Even if it's not the literal end of the world, at least you can be from one of those big important periods everyone thinks about. It's like being one of those dinosaurs that died in a bog a thousand years before the asteroid, no one's going to even romanticize the anonymous idea of you. The appeal of doomsday cults is that you don't really have to worry about tomorrow. Who cares about the climate, or the economy, or your estranged grandchildren? The world will end before you have to suffer any uncomfortable consequences to that.
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Jan 16, 2024 02:04
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Killer robot posted:It's the same reason why believing we're in some kind of end times is popular no matter who stands to benefit from it or doesn't. It's scary to think that one day you'll be gone and everyone who knew you will be gone, and yet the world will be going along in blissful ignorance of all you ever did and were. Even if it's not the literal end of the world, at least you can be from one of those big important periods everyone thinks about. It's like being one of those dinosaurs that died in a bog a thousand years before the asteroid, no one's going to even romanticize the anonymous idea of you. Which is weird to me, because I find the idea that the world will still be spinning long after I'm gone very comforting. "I might have dropped the ball several times, but at least I didn't fail to stop the apocalypse!  "
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Jan 16, 2024 02:07
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When faced with the existential dread of the certainty of death, some people respond with fear or anxiety while others respond with a shrug or a lol. Conspiracists tend to land in the former group.
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Jan 16, 2024 02:16
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One thing that also keeps coming up with this type is the (deliberate?) confusion between expertise and supremacy. From the Protocols of Zion whining about how the Jews are secretly replacing hereditary offices with elected ones and replacing religion with science to Jones and Icke saying that every kind of expert except cranks who agree with them "thinks they are better than the ordinary people." Conservapedia was infamous for this too. I think it fits very well with biblical literalism because it takes the "you know the Bible as well as a bishop does" attitude and applies it to knowing climatology better than climatologists etc. "You can't tell me what to do" plus fear of the incredible amount of knowledge built up and that you'll never learn it all, well that doesn't matter if most of it is fake.
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Jan 16, 2024 02:23
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Guavanaut posted:I think at the other end there's also the popular myth of the start times, a time when we all lived in harmony with nature and everything was nice and peaceful. An idyllic previous time that's heavily romanticized and that we've since strayed from is also a core component of fascism Especially when it's not true at all, partly because believing the happy lie is easier than the more complicated reality
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Jan 16, 2024 03:53
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Gen. Ripper posted:Which is weird to me, because I find the idea that the world will still be spinning long after I'm gone very comforting. "I might have dropped the ball several times, but at least I didn't fail to stop the apocalypse! Welcome to Night Vale, of all things, had a line that really stuck with me about the whole "the world keeps spinning after you're gone" thing. quote:Death is only the end if you assume the story is about you.
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Jan 16, 2024 05:07
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Techno Remix posted:Flat earth is one I can’t ever figure out the who or why. Who benefits? Who is the “they” in “what they aren’t telling you”? The globalist elite will lose all their power if people realise the globe itself is a lie
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Jan 16, 2024 10:47
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Techno Remix posted:With a lot of conspiracy theories I can at least follow the lines and determine who’s supposed to benefit from this being true. Frequently the answer seems to be "NASA". They really hate NASA for some reason and are very confident that NASA actually confirmed flat earth back in the 60s but realized they'd lose their funding if it got out so they decided instead to create a conspiracy involving hundreds of airlines and governments.
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Jan 16, 2024 14:31
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Techno Remix posted:With a lot of conspiracy theories I can at least follow the lines and determine who’s supposed to benefit from this being true. Others have mentioned the middle-man answers... but with almost any conspiracy theory with a decent number of followers the answer is inevitably "Jews".
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Jan 16, 2024 14:34
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It's also not for nothing that flat earthers know that their idea is absurd, but continually spiraling downwards into conspiracies requires taking on more and more absurd ideas. If you are trying to work towards "actually life should be perfect and the human condition is orchestrated by a shadowy cabal of evil people" then it's not enough for them to just control banks, because that isn't a grand enough scale. No, they need something *big*, something gigantic to demonstrate the power they have and why they can make death exist and your kids not want to call you. Thus, flat earth.
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Jan 16, 2024 14:59
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generatrix posted:Others have mentioned the middle-man answers... but with almost any conspiracy theory with a decent number of followers the answer is inevitably "Jews". This can’t be over-emphasized, if you’ve been reading about a conspiracy theory which is new to you for more than ten minutes and haven’t encountered the antisemitism, your source isn’t being honest enough.
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Jan 16, 2024 15:05
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I think there's also, especially in the halfway there but not fully Space Jews people, the idea that someone is lying to them. And someone is, it's the people saying that the Bible is inerrant and speaks with a single authoritative voice and accurately describes natural causes. But if you don't want to believe that, you can believe it's the entire of academia who are making poo poo up on purpose to socially engineer you. That's also believed is some way or form by a lot of the alt-right/alt-lite, even the ones who are fine with the physical sciences saying the moon is real, but will believe everything OAN says about the social science department. (Which also goes back to not wanting to believe that years long multivariate analyses might come up with better solutions than their cool instant thought.)
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Jan 16, 2024 15:11
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Scruff McGruff posted:Frequently the answer seems to be "NASA". They really hate NASA for some reason and are very confident that NASA actually confirmed flat earth back in the 60s but realized they'd lose their funding if it got out so they decided instead to create a conspiracy involving hundreds of airlines and governments. "poo poo, we can't let it get out that the earth is flat, or else we'll have no reason to exist. ...I guess besides the billions of stars, exoplanets, singularities, nebulae--" "Those are all holes poked in the Celestial Dome. You've bought into your own lie!" "Nooo!"
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Jan 16, 2024 15:23
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Scruff McGruff posted:Frequently the answer seems to be "NASA". They really hate NASA for some reason and are very confident that NASA actually confirmed flat earth back in the 60s but realized they'd lose their funding if it got out so they decided instead to create a conspiracy involving hundreds of airlines and governments. 
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Jan 16, 2024 16:43
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Folding Ideas' In Search Of A Flat Earth is a good rundown of this for the first half, before the twist. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JTfhYyTuT44
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Jan 16, 2024 16:57
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Sometimes I idly wonder how the Hollow Earth and Flat Earth people get along, or the Celestial Dome and the Lizard Aliens. But I'm 99% sure they have some variant of blaming jewish people to explain the diconnect so I am not going to spend time checking.
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Jan 16, 2024 17:09
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According to Jon Ronson, Alex Jones and David Icke hate one another for "making up stupid poo poo" so that's  to think about.
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Jan 16, 2024 17:17
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Reptilians is a direct find-and-replace for antisemitism, and Hollow Earth becomes antisemitism after a couple of pages. “New” ideas in conspiracy spaces are all reaches and bends to try and adapt whatever material feels most topical to the theorists to be about Jewish people and their universal lockstep cooperation, with brown and non-Protestant people added on in more modern times.
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Jan 16, 2024 19:16
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Neito posted:Folding Ideas' In Search Of A Flat Earth is a good rundown of this for the first half, before the twist. Seconded. And he delivers the twist in such an upbeat tone! 
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Jan 16, 2024 19:20
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LonsomeSon posted:Reptilians is a direct find-and-replace for antisemitism, and Hollow Earth becomes antisemitism after a couple of pages.
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Jan 16, 2024 19:22
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Soricidus posted:The globalist elite will lose all their power if people realise the globe itself is a lie I imagine there are at least some people who eat up the Steve Bannon antiglobalist nonsense because they think it means round-earthers
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Jan 16, 2024 19:42
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I've seen chuds praising the wackjob libertarian president they have in Argentina, talking about how he's totally gonna stick it to the globalists. But didn't they dollarize their economy? Isn't that as globalist as you can get?
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Jan 16, 2024 21:07
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Aztec Galactus posted:I imagine there are at least some people who eat up the Steve Bannon antiglobalist nonsense because they think it means round-earthers Worried about globohomo for the globo, not the homo.
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Jan 16, 2024 21:11
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Ashcans posted:Sometimes I idly wonder how the Hollow Earth and Flat Earth people get along, or the Celestial Dome and the Lizard Aliens. A Hollow Earther and a Flat Earther bump into each other in the middle of a Gentile town. One asks the other, "How's business?" And the other replies, "... Great!"
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Jan 16, 2024 21:28
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Animal-Mother posted:A Hollow Earther and a Flat Earther bump into each other in the middle of a Gentile town. One asks the other, "How's business?" And the other replies, "... Great!" huh?
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Jan 16, 2024 21:30
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Flat Earthers are getting scarce. The new cool thing is the 'Mud Flood and Giants'. Apparently there was a world wide mud flood a few centuries ago (not Noah's Flood) and this wiped out intelligent civilizations and giant humans! Their proof? Some old buildings have cladding upto a certain point, therefore that was the mud level defense. Or some old buildings have basement windows, therefore that basement floor was a ground level floor in the past. And giants because some stones look like faces.
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Jan 16, 2024 22:02
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happyhippy posted:Flat Earthers are getting scarce. Sounds related to the "Plateaus are the stumps of old trees" thing.
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Jan 16, 2024 22:14
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Neito posted:Sounds related to the "Plateaus are the stumps of old trees" thing. I love that beyond all reason.
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Jan 16, 2024 22:33
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Animal-Mother posted:A Hollow Earther and a Flat Earther bump into each other in the middle of a Gentile town. One asks the other, "How's business?" And the other replies, "... Great!" W🎩 vvvvvvvv I think I've played that map Weatherman fucked around with this message at 23:11 on Jan 16, 2024 |
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Jan 16, 2024 22:35
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 My favorite flat earth conspiracy things is that the non-global elites are actually hiding secret hyperborean landmasses outside of the Antarctica ice walls because they get all the land to themselves (?).
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Jan 16, 2024 22:39
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If any of this poo poo were true it would own, but I always feel bad in indulging in it because you know, (((reasons)))
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Jan 16, 2024 23:14
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A classic joke among old-school Jewish comedians was "Two gentile businessmen meet in the street. One says to the other, 'How's business?' and the other says, 'It's great, thanks for asking.'" The joke being that a couple of Jewish businessmen would always have something to complain about even if they were doing well.
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Jan 16, 2024 23:26
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You see, global warming is real, but it's good because we're doing it to melt the ice wall so we can go forth and conquer the rest of the flat Earth. Seriously, I live in the US, there's no way we wouldn't just nuke the ice wall and start an eternal war of conquest to help someone win the next election.
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Jan 16, 2024 23:27
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cat botherer posted:
I also enjoy Hunter x Hunter, but it should have ended after the revelation of the larger flat earth the government was keeping secret.
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Jan 16, 2024 23:57
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