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a neat cape posted:The realization that I have done nothing with my life combined with the only thing I REALLY care about, my family which are moving halfway across the country and the fact that I feel like I am being left behind is all kinda starting to hit me at once Sorry bud  that’s rough. Existential crises seem to come hard and fast at the Typical Goon Age.
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Jan 17, 2024 12:14
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Yep. Do you have any goals, long term or short term? They don’t have to be objectively important. Just important to you. Or any art that you want to practice?
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Jan 17, 2024 12:18
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Could be a good opportunity, Ross. Force you out of your comfort zone a bit, make you try new things. And it’s never as bad as you think it is. That’s just midlife ennui creeping up on you.
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Jan 17, 2024 12:30
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My midlife ennui precipitated into abrupt newfound sobriety and deciding to become a loving engineer at 40. There’s no light at the end of the tunnel yet and I’m nuts deep in my calculus series, but sometimes you’ve got to unmake your life to make it more fulfilling.
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Jan 17, 2024 12:41
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FizFashizzle posted:Could be a good opportunity, Ross. Yeah, exactly. I had an opportunity to reflect on that over the past day and a half (my Internet had been spotty starting on Sunday and then completely crapped the bed on Monday morning, and then a software update bricked my phone an hour later; I didn't fix my phone until about 3:30 this morning after a marathon debugging session and Mediacom tunneled in and fixed some settings on my router around 5 this morning, so I literally had no contact with the outside world), and ennui is the perfect word to describe it. Like, sure, I have a roof over my head, I'm engaged to a fantastic woman and we start looking at apartments next month, but I also have only $20.47 to my name at the moment because I forgot to cancel my Amazon Prime subscription and my only income right now is coming from freelance work, and at the end of July, I'll be 40. Depressing! While my sobriety journey post-relapse is coming along quite well (combining IOP with addiction-specific one-on-one therapy), I've also had new setbacks with my IgA nephropathy (a fairly nasty kidney disease) and I am convinced I have a new DVT behind my left knee. (But since I didn't have a working phone, I couldn't call anyone for a ride to urgent care.) So for that day and a half, I wrote, I read books, did some crosswords and did a lot of reflection. Decided I'm going to force myself to get back into photography; back in the day here in Dubuque, I had a gallery expo at one of the local colleges back in 2008 or 2009 and my photos were regularly featured in papers and magazines. And yet I've broken out my camera and my lenses precisely once since I left my ex-wife nearly six years ago, and that was for a kid's birthday party. Just gonna force myself to get back into something that I love. (And finally play Red Dead Redemption 2, which I've had on my PS4 hard drive since December 2022 after picking it up in a PSN sale but I've only played it for about four minutes.) Timby fucked around with this message at 12:56 on Jan 17, 2024 |
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Jan 17, 2024 12:46
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The number of nights I haven't been able to sleep recently due to my mind racing about the worst possible outcome in infinite problems, some of them comical after a day or two of thought is far higher than I would like. On the plus side I have gotten very good at quietly putting together casseroles for dinner as a way to channel nervous energy and kill time with something that I need to refocus thought on so mealtimes the day after are very stress free.
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Jan 17, 2024 14:02
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As a scorpio losing myself in process is how I deal with all my life stress Well, that and revenge plotting. But again, process.
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Jan 17, 2024 14:04
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Hey, it took me 20+ years to admit to myself I was a woman. Now I’ve been out for 2 years, I’m in grad school (for a MSW. I’m always going to be poor lol), I’ve made a bunch of new friends, I even had a girlfriend and maybe I’m going to have a new one in the near future? But yeah, it didn’t feel like I was going anywhere for a long time and then I kind of looked around one day and noticed everything was different (my ex telling me that I’m a person who “just does things” helped! I really do love her, in spite of how our romance ended). I’m 36 going on 37, and I’m just getting started. It took a lot of work to get here, including almost three years straight of therapy. I’m easily not the oldest person in my classes: one dude’s a grey beard who was a teacher for 30 years. Never too late to change gears, find love, or whatever it is you want/need to do.
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Jan 17, 2024 14:46
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Midlife ennui is cured by political volunteerism and/or petting animals. I’m thinking about Dave Growl.
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Jan 17, 2024 15:05
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A friend shared that their therapist told them that “feelings and thoughts after <x pm> aren’t real”. The notion being that when we are tired we often have anxious or unhelpful thoughts. Single best thing for mental health is our human connections. But good sleep habits are up there too. But don’t take my word for it, I’m just a shitposter who loves a great rear end!
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Jan 17, 2024 15:09
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Its 6 degrees, what the gently caress man
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Jan 17, 2024 15:09
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I’m also thinking about Molly, Ehud’s dog agility wunderpup.
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Jan 17, 2024 15:09
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a neat cape posted:The realization that I have done nothing with my life combined with the only thing I REALLY care about, my family which are moving halfway across the country and the fact that I feel like I am being left behind is all kinda starting to hit me at once If there’s nothing you care about but them, is there anything stopping you from moving with them? Obvs picking up and moving across the country isn’t an easy or even viable thing for most people, but it could be a goal or something to look forward to and keep you on track.
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Jan 17, 2024 15:11
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swickles posted:Its 6 degrees, what the gently caress man Welcome to life north of the Mason-Dixon Line, Florida man. Wind chills in eastern Iowa were -30 from Friday until Monday (in addition to getting about 23 inches of snow beginning with last Wednesday and ending on Sunday morning).
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Jan 17, 2024 15:12
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swickles posted:Its 6 degrees, what the gently caress man Glad it's finally warming up
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Jan 17, 2024 15:12
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I'm sure you'll figure things out, a neat cape. At least San Diego has pleasant weather. It's actually warmer today but the snow falling right now is already turning into ice on my driveway.
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Jan 17, 2024 15:14
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Just got told at work I’m being switched from salary back to hourly and I’m loving pissed off. Same pay rate, but now instead of getting all my PTO on my date of hire, it accrues every paycheck, which means come March when I hit my 3 years with the company, instead of getting all 80 hours of PTO back for the next year, I’ll have at best like 18~ hours. It’s all our new loving manager and I can’t wait to either transfer to another department or just quit this loving place (The latter becoming the more likely/attractive offer by the day - I’ve started putting in elsewhere but I’ve got enough saved up I can just leave if I wanted to, but I’d rather have something else lined up).
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Jan 17, 2024 15:15
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I'm at my neighborhood coffee shop because the sun was out and it's close enough of a walk that hovering near 0 isn't hazardous.
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Jan 17, 2024 15:16
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Coco13 posted:I'm at my neighborhood coffee shop because the sun was out and it's close enough of a walk that hovering near 0 isn't hazardous. Chicago finally climbs to the teens today. Apparently the last few days was the coldest three day stretch since 1996. That didn't seem right, but I guess the other cold snaps only last two days.
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Jan 17, 2024 15:45
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swickles posted:Its 6 degrees, what the gently caress man i'm going to northwest arkansas next month to visit the kid and granddaughter. he's been sending me pictures of the weather and snow they're getting now. i'm gonna freeze to death.
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Jan 17, 2024 17:11
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Ross, I hope you figure it out. If there's a dream or something you feel you gotta reach for, go for it. Jump, take the leap! It's all an adventure and not everyone has a Ring and an old hippy to give them a push.Aaaaaaarrrrrggggg posted:I used to work for an Australian based insurance company and had the promise of going to visit our remote folks in Australia and England. Every time the opportunity came up they sent my boss and boss's boss instead. When I finally became The Boss and the chance came up they ... Sent my boss and the boss's boss. Honestly what made me look around at all was my boss said I wasn't going to Geo-Week this year (best work event of the year by far) because they wanted to send the entire sales team. We've usually done a 60/40 sales/tech split but this year it's all hands on Sales. Kind of a bummer. Especially since I'm technically a hybrid role. Ornery and Hornery posted:I thought you did gis??? I do! This position has "(GIS)" in the title, lol. I think I'd be helping new clients learn an electric utility GIS/CAD program, among other tasks. But it's basically what I do now with more tech and more pay and more Australians. 3 DONG HORSE fucked around with this message at 17:16 on Jan 17, 2024 |
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Jan 17, 2024 17:13
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I've been feeling some of that ennui creeping into me at 37. I've started regularly exercising the last couple of months. I started really putting on body fat this last summer for the first time in my life. It's helped make me more energetic and feel better about myself. Try and follow along to a YouTube workout video. I like Bullyjuice's workouts, he's got a ton of no equipment sessions that'll wear you out.
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Jan 17, 2024 18:10
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I have thoughts for Ross and others when I get to a computer. For now, my more important and materialistic problem (kidding): I bought my first pair of boots last month, and after breaking them in, I like them. They are stylish and comfortable and fairly cheap since I was concerned that I might not like how they wear on my feet and legs. Now that I know I can wear boots, I am fine spending money on them. Now the problem is that I am a fancy bitch with footwear. I can look in 5 shoe stores and only find 1 pair I like, and they inevitably end up being the most expensive pair by far. I saw a pair of Timberlands that I like and want to know if they are worth it? Like I know they are expensive, and while I want them to be fashionable (to me) I also don't want to have to avoid snow in them. I would like to use them as functional boots as well. Are they actually good boots or am I just paying for the name?
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Jan 17, 2024 18:51
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I work a lot and feel a real sense of purpose in what I do but I had just the worst burn out right around when my grandparents died. I had a bunch of "poo poo, I should have sold out and gotten a compsci degree" thoughts even though I know I'd be loving miserable in the tech industry and felt really unmoored for a bit. Getting back in to therapy helped a lot since I really need a safe space to work through my emotions and have accountability, plus the ADHD stuff finally getting flagged even if it took a while.
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Jan 17, 2024 18:55
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Well my friend at HPE just talked me into applying to a Program Manager role at his company so I guess I'm just applying to all jobs now
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Jan 17, 2024 18:58
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Yay free half cord of wood! Boooo it’s about 4 inches to long for my pot stove! Time to axe the poo poo out it I guess (wood not the stove)
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Jan 17, 2024 19:01
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a sexual elk posted:Yay free half cord of wood! Boooo it’s about 4 inches to long for my pot stove! That's a lot of loving wood.
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Jan 17, 2024 19:04
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swickles posted:Are they actually good boots or am I just paying for the name? What kind of timberland boots are we talking? Like euro hikers? Or something a bit more utilitarian?
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Jan 17, 2024 19:08
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Well guess maybe a 1/4th. https://imgur.com/a/8VCAs0n Big pieces and it fills up almost the entire space under his deck. He’s not planning on coming up again till summer so said to have at it.
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Jan 17, 2024 19:13
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fartknocker posted:Just got told at work I’m being switched from salary back to hourly and I’m loving pissed off. Same pay rate, but now instead of getting all my PTO on my date of hire, it accrues every paycheck, which means come March when I hit my 3 years with the company, instead of getting all 80 hours of PTO back for the next year, I’ll have at best like 18~ hours. It’s all our new loving manager and I can’t wait to either transfer to another department or just quit this loving place (The latter becoming the more likely/attractive offer by the day - I’ve started putting in elsewhere but I’ve got enough saved up I can just leave if I wanted to, but I’d rather have something else lined up). I hate that kind of poo poo!!! Gahhhh gently caress that manager. What’s the level of difficulty of transferring to a different team/department? How’s your industry looking? Stable enough that getting into a different company should be relatively accessible? I keep seeing headlines about some tech companies slowing down hiring but idk if that’s true or just clickbaity headlines. Other industries like accounting, oil&gas, insurance, etc., seem to be doing alright.
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Jan 17, 2024 19:19
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We complaining in here? My daughter woke me up at 2:30 because she wet the bed so I had to help change her sheets and didn't fall asleep again until probably 4:00. I spent from 9:00 until now at the dealership getting various car poo poo fixed. The sheets are at least a huge rarity at this point. We're at the point where there's only an accident maybe once a month and she still wears pull-ups to bed and that's usually enough. I'm tired.
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Jan 17, 2024 19:21
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Ornery and Hornery posted:I hate that kind of poo poo!!! Gahhhh gently caress that manager. The secret is to get into the start up life. They are always dumb enough to be hiring because Capital XYZ Injection is at 5000% or whatever the bullshit is that day.
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Jan 17, 2024 19:23
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Size comparison https://imgur.com/a/y2wR6qi I need to clean that glass
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Jan 17, 2024 19:24
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a sexual elk posted:Size comparison that's definitely not a hot dog in a hallway
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Jan 17, 2024 19:24
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Quiet Feet posted:We complaining in here? I heard from a friend that their 6 year old wets the bed literally every night. He doesn't get up though, he just pees and sleeps through it. It means they strip the bed every night and replace his sheets though. If there's one thing I'm grateful for with my kid is that he usually sleeps through the night, and the only bed wetting issues we've had are when he's sick.
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Jan 17, 2024 19:24
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My cats have never peed anywhere but the litterbox and never bitten or scratched me. I feel very lucky. It really helps make me say oh well that they love to shred my couches and won't scratch the 50 different things I've bought them to scratch instead of the couch. It's one of their great joys in life and welp my place doesn't smell like cat and I should probably be grateful for that. edit: look at these boo boos 
kiimo fucked around with this message at 19:33 on Jan 17, 2024 |
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Jan 17, 2024 19:28
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The grey fuzzy boy I'm fostering scratches me but it's because he gets in to VERY intense kneeding when he's comfy and purring. He's good about nail trims though. Our carpet is hella old, our couch is hella old and had a hole in before we had cats, and the rug is old so I'm not as picky about scratching. The cats are pretty good about using the scratch boards the posts on the cat trees but still get the couch sometimes. The real issue is food. My fluffy residen boy is a fiend will absolutely push all the others off their bowls to get their food if humans don't intervene. I feed the two fosters in the bathroom and for a while he didn't realize there was food back there but now he knows and we have to shut the door to ensure Luna and Ashes get their breakfast/dinner and keep Katya from 2nd or 3rds. Katya will also bite, growl, amd scratch with treats and we can't givr churus because of that. I've had him since he was 5 weeks old and he's always been fed so I really am unsure where this level aggression came from.
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Jan 17, 2024 19:38
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I like it when one of my dogs burrows under the blankets then decides it's too hot so he crawls around in circles looking for an exit like a rat in a maze. Little does he know I close off his avenues of escape to keep the charade going!!
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Jan 17, 2024 19:39
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Just was in a meeting where one of the two locations I do IT support for is shutting down. The final days will be in June but now I have to see if the plan will be 2 IT techs for one location or if I get to engage in office politics and see what happens.
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Jan 17, 2024 19:45
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a sexual elk posted:Size comparison You are not cleaving a cord of that with an axe, not if you had all winter. You'd need to hold down every piece to keep it from jumping around, the irregular surfaces will be a huge pain in the rear end, and a cord of wood is a lot. It's a chainsaw, or not at all, friend. I mean hell I'd give it a go on the bandsaw but it'd still be a bitch and a half. I wouldn't want to cut it all with a chainsaw either. If I were in your situation I'd be looking for someone who needs a cord of wood, and someone else who has a cord of wood that is cut eight inches shorter.
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Jan 17, 2024 20:00
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