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SulfurMonoxideCute posted:We really need to normalize being child free the phrase "child free" has a whole lot of bad baggage ("how DARE they allow a CHILD to exist in the same vicinity as my perfect golden self!!!!!!!!!") it's not just kids though, i think it's a bigger concept of "don't make big decisions like getting married and/or having kids just because you think it's the 'next step', do it because you sincerely want to do it for its own sake" also "and extremely do not do these things because you think it will 'fix' a relationship"
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Feb 2, 2024 22:45
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InsertPotPun posted:ears work in multiple directions! It's also just normal to make eye contact frequently during conversation, if that appeals to you.
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Feb 2, 2024 22:46
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Farmer Crack-rear end posted:the phrase "child free" has a whole lot of bad baggage ("how DARE they allow a CHILD to exist in the same vicinity as my perfect golden self!!!!!!!!!") every generation since subsistence farming went out of fashion has had a shitton of DINKs, not having kids as a lifestyle choice/way things panned out and not a deliberately fringe identity is about as normal as it comes. "childfree" is just to being an adult who hasn't watched Frozen 47 times what the Dawkins New Atheist types are to sleeping in on Sunday A Wizard of Goatse fucked around with this message at 23:13 on Feb 2, 2024 |
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Feb 2, 2024 23:04
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My parents treated raising me as a chore and didn't really want to be with each other. At least neither tried to demand lots of contact with me after I became an adult so I went and found cooler people who wanted me around and no one tries to get me to come to family holidays. Those parents need to just accept the situation, they made it way more dramatic than it needs to be which just made their kid feel worse.
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Feb 2, 2024 23:05
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Troublemaker posted:
I want to try this now 
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Feb 2, 2024 23:20
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it's got to be incredibly repulsive, those things turn to shoe leather within 10 minutes of ordering
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Feb 2, 2024 23:21
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But waffle irons make things crispy and delightful
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Feb 2, 2024 23:22
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Space Kablooey posted:I had no idea ramen was supposed to be served in a bowl until i was like 20, and i still put instant ramen on a plate because i couldn't care less (and i don't have the proper bowls). And that's when i don't eat it straight off the pot, like an animal This is from a few pages ago, but you can have ramen without broth, by substituting it with an appropriately flavoured sauce. There are, in fact, ramen places around Japan that are dedicated to this style of ramen. Alternatively, you can have all the noodles & toppings on one plate, and the broth in another, and eaten by dipping what you've grasped with your chopsticks in the broth to your liking.
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Feb 2, 2024 23:22
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Larry Cum Free posted:I want to try this now please don't do McDonalds as breakfast But if you do, i hear freezing them overnight and nuking them works a treat
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Feb 2, 2024 23:42
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I love mcdonald's as breakfast and every single time I wish I'd not 20 min layer, but I keep coming back. Idk what it is about their breakfast but it's on a grease factor well well well above their daytime menu.
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Feb 2, 2024 23:43
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A Wizard of Goatse posted:every generation since subsistence farming went out of fashion has had a shitton of DINKs, not having kids as a lifestyle choice/way things panned out and not a deliberately fringe identity is about as normal as it comes. "childfree" is just to being an adult who hasn't watched Frozen 47 times what the Dawkins New Atheist types are to sleeping in on Sunday jesus christ i wasn't trying to defend the "childfree" dipshits i just think there ought to be more explicit messaging that marriage and kids should be active choices and not just "well, i don't hate you, so i guess we ought to take the 'next step' and see what happens" going with the flow
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Feb 2, 2024 23:57
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i remember hearing some dipshit years ago saying "we're going to try for a baby, not sure what else to do" and while that's not the absolute worst decision it's still a bad choice
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Feb 2, 2024 23:58
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The pressure to Just Have a Kid, C’mon, It’s Just One Kid, C’mon I Need A Grandbaby is insane in American culture and it absolutely should be countermessaged against. Ideologically child-free people are the worst possible group for this purpose, however.
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Feb 2, 2024 23:59
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tbf i don't think that one's specifically on america
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Feb 3, 2024 00:00
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Gwely Mernans posted:My grandpa would tell my mom that he would never want a Catholic doctor to deliver his child because if it was a choice between his wife and baby they would save the baby. If I could get pregnant, I would absolutely be grilling the doctors about this. I'd rather be alive than leave my husband as a single dad. This is a perfectly reasonable reason to not want a Catholic or other overly-religious doctor. Way too many doctors these days would let the mom die for the baby, and I would never, ever want that to happen to my daughter either. I'd totally be warning her that doctors can be terrible and not have a woman's best interest in mind. There's probably a much nicer way to put that that hopefully wouldn't traumatize your daughter though. Like there's gotta be a better way to frame it rather than "I'd like your mom to live and you're expendable" even if it's the truth.
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Feb 3, 2024 00:03
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I went to a ramen bar near the Korean bit of Tokyo that did Taiwanese-style dry ramen like that. Don't know if the Taiwanese thing was a weird translation, so don't ask. They thoughtfully offered a scoop of rice after you'd finished your noodles to sop up any remaining sauce.
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Feb 3, 2024 00:09
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Farmer Crack-rear end posted:i remember hearing some dipshit years ago saying "we're going to try for a baby, not sure what else to do" and while that's not the absolute worst decision it's still a bad choice "Not sure what else to do" as in, we've checked everything else off our bucket lists and now we don't know what to do with ourselves? Or, our marriage is terrible and nothing else has fixed it so we're gonna try this? Ah hell, I already know the answer.
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Feb 3, 2024 00:26
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"We've run out of things to talk about, haven't we?" "Want something to argue about?"
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Feb 3, 2024 00:28
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artsy fartsy posted:"Not sure what else to do" as in, we've checked everything else off our bucket lists and now we don't know what to do with ourselves? Or, our marriage is terrible and nothing else has fixed it so we're gonna try this? As in, schedule's open for the weekend
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Feb 3, 2024 00:42
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my favorite are the ones who are shocked - flabbergasted, even, when she "falls pregnant". Who could have foreseen this?!
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Feb 3, 2024 00:48
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Farmer Crack-rear end posted:i remember hearing some dipshit years ago saying "we're going to try for a baby, not sure what else to do" and while that's not the absolute worst decision it's still a bad choice I was a pact baby to a teen mom who slept with her drug dealer to get pregnant without telling him and then they were forced to get married because her parents were strict Catholics and threatened to turn him in if he didn't. It turned out about as well as you might imagine.
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Feb 3, 2024 00:50
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Hey crappy family buddy!  I'm the second kid my mom had, she gave the first one away (her adoptive family sucked too) and frankly we both should have been aborted. My mom would have been way better off and not stayed with abusive Catholic men. I rarely speak to her anymore since she compared me to pedos for being queer.
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Feb 3, 2024 00:52
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Grey Cat posted:I love mcdonald's as breakfast and every single time I wish I'd not 20 min layer, but I keep coming back. Idk what it is about their breakfast but it's on a grease factor well well well above their daytime menu. They get kind of annoyed when you ask them to break out the silvered/quarter pounder onions for your bacon egg and cheese bagel but they will do it and it is wonderful.
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Feb 3, 2024 00:54
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Space Kablooey posted:please don't do McDonalds as breakfast Oh I want to try eating it but no way before like 10 pm minimum. This is a treat for the intoxicated.
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Feb 3, 2024 00:55
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I don't understand the "your kids are only with you for a little while, but your partner is forever, so spend more time/energy/emotion on your partner!" mindset. I mean, the fact that your kids are only little for a few years, then they get a little older and make friends they want to spend time with, then grow up and leave and start their own lives and families away from you should be MORE incentive to spend all the time you can with the little monsters. My oldest turns 15 this year and it's killing me to think I only have him for 3 more years before he'll be independent. He's always talked about moving overseas when he grows up, so if that happens I go from seeing him every day (when he's not sleeping or training or running around with friends) to maybe once a year or so. That doesn't mean I'm going to smother him or anything for the next 3 years, but I'll definitely make time for him, however much time he wants to spend with us. Usually he'll do sports and movie nights with his dad and go on walks or rides with me where we'll just talk about everything. I can't imagine ignoring him or his little brothers just because eh, gently caress it, they'll all be out of the house in the next 8 years. poo poo, what's the point of having them if you don't want to take them on vacations and share new places and experiences with them? Of course I enjoy couple time, but family vacations are so much fun. These parents act so shocked that their children, these helpless little lives that they brought into the world, need them and depend on them; for a long time, parents are a kid's entire world. They need them for everything. Having the two most important human beings in their lives treat them as unimportant will definitely gently caress up their sense of self-worth. That story about leaving the 3-year-old who just woke up crying from a nightmare out in the hall so they could finish loving had to be so traumatic for that little guy's development. "Sorry, I know you're scared shitless and need to feel safe and comforted, but Daddy wants an orgasm." "But . . . but ... we did everything we were supposed to!" gently caress off, you piece of poo poo. You did everything but love and raise your kid. Troublemaker fucked around with this message at 01:26 on Feb 3, 2024 |
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Feb 3, 2024 01:22
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Scathach posted:If I could get pregnant, I would absolutely be grilling the doctors about this. I'd rather be alive than leave my husband as a single dad. This is a perfectly reasonable reason to not want a Catholic or other overly-religious doctor. Way too many doctors these days would let the mom die for the baby, and I would never, ever want that to happen to my daughter either. I'd totally be warning her that doctors can be terrible and not have a woman's best interest in mind. I talked to a doctor about this once (just like, casually, not as a patient) and he said that is just a TV trope. Apparently there really are very few, if any, scenarios where it's an emergency and "you have to choose, wife or baby!" Generally if something goes wrong during delivery they just, y'know, try their best to save both. The exception is things like cancer where chemo would probably kill a fetus, but delaying chemo would allow cancer to spread. But that isn't a "heat of the moment" decision and generally the mother gets to choose for herself.
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Feb 3, 2024 01:33
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artsy fartsy posted:"Not sure what else to do" as in, we've checked everything else off our bucket lists and now we don't know what to do with ourselves? Or, our marriage is terrible and nothing else has fixed it so we're gonna try this? pretty sure it was basically something along the lines of 'our relationship is unfulfilling but we lack the impetus to break up so maybe we need to take it to the 'next step''
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Feb 3, 2024 02:00
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The common theme is that the child is considered an object, a prop, a means to an end, rather than a person whom they will spend at least two decades entirely responsible for. Pratchett definitely had it right when he wrote that evil begins when you treat people as things.
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Feb 3, 2024 02:25
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Elissimpark posted:I went to a ramen bar near the Korean bit of Tokyo that did Taiwanese-style dry ramen like that. Don't know if the Taiwanese thing was a weird translation, so don't ask. Dry noodles are a thing in Taiwan yeah but I don’t know enough food history to know where it started.
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Feb 3, 2024 03:25
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Gwely Mernans posted:My grandparents prioritized each other over my mom and uncles and they are now all low contact with them. e: And as whitepuppy said, this almost never happens nowadays; there are things like HELLP syndrome, where you have to remove the pregnancy immediately or the mother dies, but the "either the mother or the baby can be saved" is really rare. Extremely gross 19th-century medical info (do not read if you're pregnant!) In the 1800s, an obstetrician's kit included devices to kill and collapse the baby so that it could pass through hips too narrow to deliver. C-sections and better childhood health care mercifully put an end to that. Arsenic Lupin fucked around with this message at 03:35 on Feb 3, 2024 |
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Feb 3, 2024 03:27
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AKA Pseudonym posted:The fact that this person is convinced that the call-center employee they're talking to is somehow behind all this makes me think that they aren't the savviest. Like maybe they aren't clear on what exactly co-signing a loan means or something like that. it may not be your name, they may be calling someone else’s old phone number which is now your number.
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Feb 3, 2024 03:27
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AreWeDrunkYet posted:On one hand, getting community input is great for making sure that stakeholders are represented in planning. On the other hand, somehow only the most insufferable people have the time and energy to engage with planning boards. There's a reason it's impossible to build apartments in most of Austin (and probably a lot of other cities), and it's mostly entitled old white people with opinions about ~property values~ and ~neighborhood character~. Running for local office on a single-issue platform of moving all zoning & council meetings to 11PM saturday night
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Feb 3, 2024 03:29
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Jaxts posted:You find out a lot about a potential spouse during a trip. You find out even more if it's a road trip. You survive that, you'll make it just fine. I knew poo poo was real real with my girlfriend when our flights got cancelled and suddenly we were instead doing a 32-hour round trip on the road and It. Was. Better. Than. Driving. Alone.
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Feb 3, 2024 03:35
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Hughlander posted:I was just going to post that... Like hoarders who are like, "People can leave if you don't make (literal) room for them in your life, objects never leave. They degrade over time and get covered with roach poop and eventually they are taken away from you by the city and you're put in a home, but they don't leave!"  John Wick of Dogs posted:Women are a slot machine into which you feed money and time in order to receive sex, and your children are a slot machine into which you insert money and time in order to receive validation. also, Grey Cat posted:I love mcdonald's as breakfast and every single time I wish I'd not 20 min layer, but I keep coming back. Idk what it is about their breakfast but it's on a grease factor well well well above their daytime menu. I got to McDonalds for their pancakes. Somehow they manage to keep the pancakes both fluffy and fully-cooked even when you douse them in butter and syrup. I also really like the steak bagels sandwiches. It's good I go there about three times a year because when I go I eat both and I am a fatass who doesn't need more calories. trickybiscuits fucked around with this message at 14:58 on Feb 3, 2024 |
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Feb 3, 2024 03:57
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Miss Manners: I don’t want anything to do with him. How should I handle it in a mature way?, teen asksquote:DEAR MISS MANNERS: I’m a junior in high school, and there is a boy in one of my classes who has feelings for me. I don’t feel the same way, and have told him that. Along with the sympathy for a teenager having to deal with an annoying guy who likes her, I'm also gently amused by young people talking about music. And laughing at the guy and his museic, who remind me of something I read a few years ago where somebody wanted advice about someone they wanted to ask out and compared the person to a . . . Justin Beiber song? Oh, young people. eta: sorry, double post
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Feb 3, 2024 04:06
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Never apologize, never back down, never show weakness 
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Feb 3, 2024 04:11
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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=w4i1yAOKUI4
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Feb 3, 2024 04:17
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quantumwell posted:One of the interesting ones was the horndog couple who left their son with the grandparents while they were busy swinging and attending orgies constantly as well as taking long vacations without him. Don't know how to find it but they were shocked when the son finally confronted them. I remember that one. And to my eyes, they are not as bad as the recent ones. Because if I remember the story rightly, they explained to their son "Hey, mummy and daddy are going away with this stranger to have "adult fun". You wouldn't like it, and you would get in the way. We still love you and support you in every other way." Which still sucks arse, and they are indeed the weirdo arsehole swingers. But the recent ones who just straight out ignore their child, and treat it as a burden/secondary responsibility always lesser than their spouse without a word of explanation, are true monsters.
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Feb 3, 2024 04:44
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Arsenic Lupin posted:Your grandpa was completely wrong. The Catholic doctrine is that if you have to make a choice between the lives of mother and child, you don't. They die together. The exception is that if you're removing the organs for another reason and the baby comes with, that's okay. In particular, when you have an ectopic pregnancy, it is moral to remove the Fallopian tube, but it is immoral to open the Fallopian tube, remove the embryo, and repair it. I guess it's the sort of situation where your three options are 'abort the fetus', 'perform a surgery that reduces fertility', and 'everyone dies', so it's just about picking the least bad option via the doctrine? Like, especially bc 'welp I'm less likely to get pregnant' isn't the point of the surgery?
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Feb 3, 2024 04:59
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Regardless I still don't want religious nuts around my body. Same group is horrible to kids anyway. Spooky and disturbing all around, much like r/relationships.
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Feb 3, 2024 05:02
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