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Quantum of Phallus
Dec 27, 2010

we;ve moved on

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Gumball Gumption
Jan 7, 2012

It's just kind of crazy how often no one wants to talk about Punk actually trying to kill people backstage. Dude tried to kill Tony like he's the Coyote and just heard about the movie

projecthalaxy
Dec 27, 2008

Yes hello it is I Kurt's Secret Son




For good, for bad, or in between, this is the single picture that is the soul and truth of AEW.

Trying
Sep 26, 2019

baggie full of sodas? guess that’s “the juice” wrestlers are always alluding to

Pylons
Mar 16, 2009

Baggie full of sodas is something that never occurred to me, rather than carrying a bunch of cans like the too many limes guy.

Sydney Bottocks
Oct 15, 2004
Probation
Can't post for 3 days!
Basically P*nk sold out and went back to suck a Saudi blood money-covered dick, so he can pay the mortgage on his trashy $4 million L.A. pad, which he bought in the hopes of being hired to do more Tubi-exclusive movies. So if the Bucks want to make fun of him now he's no longer there to throw hands at people, I'm fine with it. I do agree it does seem rather petty on their part, but it's not the worst example of pettiness in pro wrestling

NienNunb
Feb 15, 2012

Gumball Gumption posted:

It's just kind of crazy how often no one wants to talk about Punk actually trying to kill people backstage. Dude tried to kill Tony like he's the Coyote and just heard about the movie

Gumball Gumption
Jan 7, 2012

I don't see Punk having it in him to try killing a man for his wife's honor. He's a killer but not a brave one.

Quantum of Phallus
Dec 27, 2010

tony hosed around and found out 💅

y'all be like "workers rights" and then as soon as one of them tries to kill a billionaire, everyone hates him?????

Astro7x
Aug 4, 2004
Thinks It's All Real
Why has Miro disappeared again?

Pylons
Mar 16, 2009

Astro7x posted:

Why has Miro disappeared again?

AEW Mecca: He's just taking care of his wife who had a really nasty infection and medical issues.

AEW Hell: Rankings are back and he won't job.

projecthalaxy
Dec 27, 2008

Yes hello it is I Kurt's Secret Son


he has to get cucked out of a job to feel anything anymore

Eat This Glob
Jan 14, 2008

God is dead. God remains dead. And we have killed him. Who will wipe this blood off us? What festivals of atonement, what sacred games shall we need to invent?

Astro7x posted:

Why has Miro disappeared again?

the guy he was feuding with went back home to the wwe and his wife who was a part of the angle had a nasty infection so 2 out of his 3 dancing partners are gone and the third is god and negotiations have stalled to get him on tv

Quantum of Phallus
Dec 27, 2010

Astro7x posted:

Why has Miro disappeared again?

trying to find his way back into wwe but he can't get siri working

UnleashedDad
Jan 14, 2022

hi im tony. did you know that a koala's appendix is about two meters long.
Thought about what is going on with Miro very briefly yesterday and realized I don't care. It'll be the same start stop stuff with him until he leaves, and we'll be better for it.

Quantum of Phallus
Dec 27, 2010

UnleashedDad posted:

Thought about what is going on with Miro very briefly yesterday and realized I don't care. It'll be the same start stop stuff with him until he leaves, and we'll be better for it.

just bring him out every few months to fight big boys until his contract expires

Sisal Two-Step
May 29, 2006

mom without jaw
dad without wife


i'm taking all the Ls now, sorry

Gumball Gumption posted:

It's just kind of crazy how often no one wants to talk about Punk actually trying to kill people backstage. Dude tried to kill Tony like he's the Coyote and just heard about the movie

samoa joe saved tiny con's life and thats why hes the champ now. coincidence??

JUNGLE BOY
Sep 23, 2019

Pylons posted:

AEW Mecca: He's just taking care of his wife who had a really nasty infection and medical issues.

AEW Hell: Rankings are back and he won't job.

once again the hell thread is the only place one can tell the truth here

Quantum of Phallus
Dec 27, 2010

JUNGLE BOY posted:

once again the hell thread is the only place one can tell the truth here

Shard
Jul 30, 2005

Sisal Two-Step posted:

samoa joe saved tiny con's life and thats why hes the champ now. coincidence??

Hell yeah Joe rules

NienNunb
Feb 15, 2012

If your life is being threatened by the fierce martial arts hands of my friend Pepsi Phil then that’s on you.

Gumball Gumption
Jan 7, 2012

He tried to drop a bunch of TVs on Tony. What material art is that? Crouching rabbit, hidden daffy

MJeff
Jun 2, 2011

THE LIAR
Super Smash Bros.

On The Internet
Jun 27, 2023

Have Miro write a book of the Bible, but it's just a list if hefty boys he needs to Smite. He can win all the matches, challenge for the title and lose. Then he can go to wwe or something.

JUNGLE BOY
Sep 23, 2019

unless they were CRTs the TVs couldn’t have weighed more than 30lbs collectively. not enough to crush an adult to death. no worse than what he puts his workers through week in and week out

Quantum of Phallus
Dec 27, 2010

punk threw the tvs sideways like a throwing star

MJeff
Jun 2, 2011

THE LIAR
Punk tried to shove Khan into the TV like in Persona 4.

NienNunb
Feb 15, 2012

JUNGLE BOY posted:

unless they were CRTs the TVs couldn’t have weighed more than 30lbs collectively. not enough to crush an adult to death. no worse than what he puts his workers through week in and week out

Tony was playing Melee on a 100lb CRT at the time of the devastating attack. Onlookers could hear muffled grumblings about “less input lag” under the rubble and debris.

JUNGLE BOY
Sep 23, 2019

tony nervously sweating as hell thread activity begins ticking back up

Quantum of Phallus
Dec 27, 2010

after last week’s collision drawing the lowest numbers ever…

NienNunb
Feb 15, 2012

Tiny Con running around Wembly Stadium with a 90s CRT tv (compete with bent bunny ear antennas) stuck over his head, trying to find someone to pull him out of it.

Sydney Bottocks
Oct 15, 2004
Probation
Can't post for 3 days!
Punk just wanted to reenact the end of the fight between John Cusack and Dan Aykroyd from his favorite film Grosse Pointe Blank, he just forgot to tell Tony about it

E: also he forgot they were in Britain, TK got real mad at having wasted the money on license fees for all the broken TV sets

On The Internet
Jun 27, 2023

TK brings around CRTs and VCRs so he can watch his old wrestling tapes the way God intended. He made the mistake of inviting CM Punk to watch some AJPW before All In.

NienNunb
Feb 15, 2012

Tony is a card carrying member of the Victorville Film Archive

Eat My Fuc
May 29, 2007



Tony Khan spotted on my ring camera…

Quantum of Phallus
Dec 27, 2010

Eat My Fuc posted:



Tony Khan spotted on my ring camera…

NienNunb
Feb 15, 2012

Eat My Fuc posted:



Tony Khan spotted on my ring camera…

Thank you, for this, my boy

Shinjobi
Jul 10, 2008


Gravy Boat 2k

MJeff posted:

Punk tried to shove Khan into the TV like in Persona 4.

We've got footage of it all happening backstage


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=k4cDULqYhkY

Gumball Gumption
Jan 7, 2012

JUNGLE BOY posted:

unless they were CRTs the TVs couldn’t have weighed more than 30lbs collectively. not enough to crush an adult to death. no worse than what he puts his workers through week in and week out

Punk thinking he could kill someone with them doesn't make Tony look like an idiot. Shooting nerf but absolutely convinced it was lead. He had murder in his heart.

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Drakkel
May 6, 2007

IT'S LIKE I CAN TOUCH YOU!
I mean I know it's Hell Thread but I'm pretty sure if you put the shittiest fighter in the history of UFC against a tiny nerd who looks like he's never lifted anything heavier than a laptop in his life, I'm pretty sure the UFC fighter would loving destroy him.

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