r/relationships: I have nothing against this baby.

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Lt. Danger: Dec 22, 2006; jolly good chaps we sure showed the hun

but... by not having a big wedding, they... they are saving money though...??

# ? Mar 30, 2024 12:16

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# ? May 30, 2024 22:49

MagusofStars: Mar 31, 2012

Lt. Danger posted:

but... by not having a big wedding, they... they are saving money though...??

But the house doesn't mean as much if you don't have to save up money yourselves for a down payment first! You need to work and earn your right to own a house!

Do you think your mother and I had someone write us a check for a down payment? No, we just saved our pennies and clipped coupons for a couple months. Back in 1987, when we were first married, we managed to scrape together a down payment in like four months of dedicated saving, why can't you just do that?

# ? Mar 30, 2024 12:24

artsy fartsy: May 10, 2014; You'll be ahead instead of behind. Hello!

Use the parents' money for the wedding like they want but have the venue be the new house, duh. Next question

# ? Mar 30, 2024 12:48

boofhead: Feb 18, 2021

Take the money for the wedding but first set up a very expensive wedding planning company (you) that has only one client (you). Three hundred serviettes from Costco for $5k, spare no expense, a wedding is definitely worth it

# ? Mar 30, 2024 13:15

greazeball: Feb 4, 2003

MagusofStars posted:

But the house doesn't mean as much if you don't have to save up money yourselves for a down payment first! You need to work and earn your right to own a house!

Do you think your mother and I had someone write us a check for a down payment? No, we just saved our pennies and clipped coupons for a couple months. Back in 1987, when we were first married, we managed to scrape together a down payment in like four months of dedicated saving, why can't you just do that?

Well ok sure my parents did help us a little bit but it was only $5,000 (in 1981), that's different!

# ? Mar 30, 2024 13:32

Biplane: Jul 18, 2005

If my parents gave me 30k (an insane amount of money) on the condition I spent it on a wedding I'd say sure! And then happily spend that on a downpayment on a house and easily never talk to them again if they made any sort of fuss.

# ? Mar 30, 2024 15:43

mystes: May 31, 2006

Why the gently caress would people save that much money specifically for their kids to spend on a wedding but not so they can have a place to live

My suggestion is: gently caress the parents, just get go to the town hall to get married and don't have a ceremony, but then constantly drop hints to the parents about how you want to have kids but can't do it because you don't have enough space in your apartment. I bet parents who would earmark tens of thousands of dollars specifically for a wedding would be very susceptible to that. Then once you get the house, don't have kids, because gently caress the parents and who can afford that in this economy

mystes fucked around with this message at 16:23 on Mar 30, 2024

# ? Mar 30, 2024 16:20

the holy poopacy: May 16, 2009; hey! check this out; Fun Shoe

mystes posted:

Why the gently caress would people save that much money specifically for their kids to spend on a wedding but not so they can have a place to live

The wedding is a form of conspicuous consumption that lets you show off to your friends and family, you don't get to invite 200 people to see your kid's house that's much less impressive than your own is anyhow.

# ? Mar 30, 2024 16:25

Kiss Kiss Bang Bang: Dec 28, 2007; Kiss this and hang

artsy fartsy posted:

Use the parents' money for the wedding like they want but have the venue be the new house, duh. Next question

Better to ask forgiveness than permission and all that.

# ? Mar 30, 2024 16:26

mystes: May 31, 2006

Do it like someone stealing money from their company and set up a fake wedding planning company to issue fake invoices to the parents

# ? Mar 30, 2024 16:31

Remulak: Jun 8, 2001; I can't count to four.; Yams Fan

Shanghaied posted:

loving boomers/gen-x.

# ? Mar 30, 2024 16:46

Pigsfeet on Rye: Oct 22, 2008; I'm meat on the hoof

mystes posted:

Do it like someone stealing money from their company and set up a fake wedding planning company to issue fake invoices to the parents

A �Willy Wonka Experience�style wedding, all expenses spared!

# ? Mar 30, 2024 16:53

haveblue: Aug 15, 2005; Toilet Rascal

Pigsfeet on Rye posted:

A �Willy Wonka Experience�style wedding, all expenses spared!

All the awful parents are killed by deathtraps one by one?

# ? Mar 30, 2024 17:35

Josef bugman: Nov 17, 2011; Pictured: Poster prepares to celebrate Holy Communion (probablY)

This avatar made possible by a gift from the Religionthread Posters Relief Fund

haveblue posted:

All the awful parents are killed by deathtraps one by one?

Oh if you've missed it a very VERY poo poo willy wonka themed "day out" happened in Glasgow and the Internet has spent the last few weeks mocking it.

# ? Mar 30, 2024 17:52

Fil5000: Jun 23, 2003; HOLD ON GUYS I'M POSTING ABOUT INTERNET ROBOTS

I assume the parents have decided that as that money isn't going on what they intended they'll just spend it on poo poo they want or need but don't want to outright say it.

# ? Mar 30, 2024 17:57

InsertPotPun: Apr 16, 2018; Pissy Bitch stan

buy a house to have the wedding in the backyard of, duh

# ? Mar 30, 2024 18:23

Mordiceius: Nov 10, 2007; If you think calling me names is gonna get a rise out me, think again. I like my life as an idiot!

AITA for telling my husband that sometimes I get the "ick" over how he always drinks wine instead of beer?

quote:

I (31f) have been married to my husband (32m) for 3 years now. I love him and we have a great relationship.

However, we recently had our third anniversary. We went to dinner and then when we came home we were reflecting on our marriage. He asked me "Have you been happy with me as a husband?" I told him "yes," that I've been very happy. He then asked "OK, but is there something you wish I would do differently? Something I haven't been seeing that you would like to be different?"

I thought for a second, and then answered: "Well, whenever we go out you always order wine. I know you like wine, and I don't care, but once in a while I think it's a little weird that you NEVER order beer or liquor instead. It's probably just where I grew up, but sometimes I see it as less masculine and it gives me a slight case of the ick."

I grew up in rural MN, while he grew up in the Twin Cities. I just never saw my grandfathers, dad, or uncles drinking wine. I was just being honest.

He got this hurt look on his face and said "That's not what I was asking. I wasn't asking you to judge my personal tastes. I just wanted to know if I was neglecting you or taking you for granted in some way."

He's still a little mad at me. I know I was being a little judgemental, but he asked me a question and I thought I was just answering honestly. He shouldn't have asked if he didn't want to know, right?

# ? Mar 30, 2024 19:09

Stefan Prodan: Jan 7, 2002; I deeply respect you as a human being... Some day I'm gonna make you *Mrs* Buck Turgidson!; Grimey Drawer

fellas is it gay to drink wine

# ? Mar 30, 2024 19:20

mystes: May 31, 2006

Mordiceius posted:

AITA for telling my husband that sometimes I get the "ick" over how he always drinks wine instead of beer?

If someone told me that ordering wine wasn't manly enough I would probably order a fruit-based cocktail whenever I was at a restaurant with them from then on

# ? Mar 30, 2024 19:23

Stefan Prodan: Jan 7, 2002; I deeply respect you as a human being... Some day I'm gonna make you *Mrs* Buck Turgidson!; Grimey Drawer

my wife and I always order each other's drinks because I will get some fruity thing and she'll order a rusty nail or some poo poo and it's just like well when it comes they're going to give it to the wrong one of us anyway we might as well do it for them and then just swap

# ? Mar 30, 2024 19:24

AKA Pseudonym: May 16, 2004; A dashing and sophisticated young man; Doctor Rope

AITB for indicating that someone's music taste is embarrassing?

quote:

I (F21) work at a local cafe/sandwich shop. The manager is pretty nice. Just as long as they're not explicit, he lets us play our own music so we would take turns on playing our playlists. The topic involves one of our cooks, I'll call her Stacey (F19). She's nice although a little shy. Not the most interesting person when you meet her but there is one weird thing about her, and that's her taste in music.

The rest of us play music that fit the small restaurant vibe. Like current pop or alternative and 80's songs. Stacey on the other hand is very eclectic. I have nothing against it. I listen to Taylor Swift to Mackelmore, but hers is all over the place. She'll have Megan Thee Stallion, Imagine Dragons, and BlackPink. But then she'll have 90s musicals, 2000's dance pop, anime (not J-pop, I mean like instrumental music) and one time even a Christmas song (in March).

I asked her why is her music so crazy. She laughed and said she gets comments like that about her music a lot. It just boils down to her being really close with her mom and that some of her favorite songs are also her mom's favorites. I then asked, "you don't ever get embarrassed when you get comments like that?". She asked me, "what do you mean?" and I said I mean what I mean. A few of our co-workers spoke up saying they think it's fine and that her playlist is fun. I asked them "have you heard anything from her playlist in a restaurant or a grocery store?" And they were like "no, but so what". I just dropped it. It was pretty awkward for a while but eventually it died down as the day went on. This happened yesterday.

I asked my friends and they're pretty split on this. When I named some of Stacey's song they all agree it would be weird to hear that out in a public setting but it's either "if it doesn't bother anybody then it's ok" or "there's a reason you need earbuds for that".

So, AITB?

# ? Mar 30, 2024 19:24

Pookah: Aug 21, 2008; 🪶Caw🪶

In my local Tesco express, they have a big ol' stereo and a playlist that is exclusively '90 pop and club music. It's great!

# ? Mar 30, 2024 19:30

Shanghaied: Oct 12, 2004; BIG PAD

AKA Pseudonym posted:

AITB for indicating that someone's music taste is embarrassing?

quote:
Imagine Dragons

NTA

# ? Mar 30, 2024 19:33

BOOTY-ADE: Aug 30, 2006; BIG KOOL TELLIN' Y'ALL TO KEEP IT TIGHT

CannonFodder posted:

Today I saw a bro truck lifted Ram, but the back tailgate had an airbrush painting of Sasquatch posing sexily with a raccoon over where his junk would be.

This glorious beast:

that looks like the squatch from the Jack Links commercials

Stefan Prodan posted:

fellas is it gay to drink wine

Arsenic & homosexual grapes

# ? Mar 30, 2024 19:34

Ensign Expendable: Nov 11, 2008; Lager beer is proof that god loves us; Pillbug

Mordiceius posted:

AITA for telling my husband that sometimes I get the "ick" over how he always drinks wine instead of beer?

My husband is great but gee, I wish he would be a little more like my dad

# ? Mar 30, 2024 19:42

haveblue: Aug 15, 2005; Toilet Rascal

"crushing a couple of wines with the guys" just doesn't have the same ring to it

# ? Mar 30, 2024 19:45

Pigsfeet on Rye: Oct 22, 2008; I'm meat on the hoof

Mordiceius posted:

AITA for telling my husband that sometimes I get the "ick" over how he always drinks wine instead of beer?

Get him a � Tackleford Wine Club for Men� t-shirt

# ? Mar 30, 2024 19:49

Biplane: Jul 18, 2005

Cracking open a room temperature one with the boys

# ? Mar 30, 2024 19:54

Desert Bus: May 9, 2004; Take 1 tablet by mouth daily.

The only alcohol in my house right now is a box of Franzia White Zinfandel and a a penis haver I wish it was better wine.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=er-Q3DQJR0c

# ? Mar 30, 2024 20:03

haveblue: Aug 15, 2005; Toilet Rascal

Coors White, the wine as cold as Napa Valley

# ? Mar 30, 2024 20:10

Kenshin: Jan 10, 2007

Thread favorite topic, from a long term angle this time:

Dear Prudence posted:

Opened Past: I’m a 50-year-old woman. My boyfriend George and I have been dating casually for over two years and became exclusive at the beginning of this year. When we met, we knew we were both divorced and not looking for a serious commitment. We also didn’t disclose the reasons for our divorce, which was fine with me. The only information we knew was that both our divorces turned into an ugly mess. Three weeks ago, I attended the wedding of George’s son. I was warned ahead of time that George’s ex-wife Linda would be difficult and might be resentful of my presence. As predicted, Linda made a scene at the reception. After she was escorted away, George’s sister Melissa went to check up on me. We got to talking, and I pressed Melissa to reveal the reason for George’s divorce.

Linda had persuaded George to have an open marriage, and after being unhappy with the arrangement, they divorced. The revelation hit close to home for me, as that was what I did to my ex-husband. All of the guilt and remorse I felt in the months leading up to and after my own crumbled marriage resurfaced, and I saw myself in Linda. Like Linda, I too was viewed as a pariah by my own children and relatives. I’ve long regretted the choice I made and the hurt I caused my ex-husband and my children. It has taken me years to turn a corner and build back my relationship with my children. I’ve continually feared having to explain to any of my future partners the full details of my divorce. I had hoped after a few years of being together, I would feel comfortable enough to tell George the whole truth. Never in a million years did I think I would meet another man who went through the same struggles as my ex-husband. George is a sweet and loving man whom I feel comfortable moving forward in my life with. My heart would be broken for a second time if things were to end between us. I fear that once George learns about this part of my past he’ll end what we’ve just started. I’m not that woman anymore, and the reasons I wanted an open marriage were no longer important to me. Should I tell George the truth? I worry he will eventually find out. I’ve intentionally tried to limit George from any contact with my family. But my own children’s wedding days will be coming soon, and an easy slip-up could just as well happen. Should I confess my past deeds?

I didn't see the response from Prudence else I'd post it, maybe because I am not a Slate subscriber

# ? Mar 30, 2024 20:19

Quackles: Aug 11, 2018; Pixels of Light.

Kenshin posted:

Thread favorite topic, from a long term angle this time:

I didn't see the response from Prudence else I'd post it, maybe because I am not a Slate subscriber

Prudence posted:

Dear Opened Past,

You have to tell him. �I got divorced because I wanted an open marriage� would probably be hard for George to hear, but �I got divorced because I wanted an open marriage, and I completely regret it. I�m not the same woman anymore and have no interest in that kind of lifestyle these days. I know this is probably a sensitive issue for you because of your history, so I hesitated to bring it up, but I didn�t want to hide anything from you� will be a lot easier to digest. Or at least, it should be.

Keep in mind, this is not the same as you dropping this on him on the second date. He knows you. He loves you. He�s serious about you (enough to bring you to a wedding and risk the resulting drama!). If your connection is as strong as it seems to be and if he�s reasonable, I think that this conversation can happen without any major repercussions. You have to tell him because if you don�t, the secret (which, by the way, isn�t anything to be ashamed of) and the fear of what happens if it�s revealed will take a real toll on your ability to enjoy the relationship.

# ? Mar 30, 2024 20:22

AceClown: Sep 11, 2005

chillin in the coffee shop dropping my best Hudson Mohawke playlist

# ? Mar 30, 2024 20:24

Desert Bus: May 9, 2004; Take 1 tablet by mouth daily.

AceClown posted:

chillin in the coffee shop dropping my best Hudson Mohawke playlist

You know that makes the ladies hot

# ? Mar 30, 2024 20:36

Kenshin: Jan 10, 2007

Thank you Quackles!

# ? Mar 30, 2024 20:38

Mushmouth: Feb 21, 2004; Urban Tumbleweed

Pookah posted:

In my local Tesco express, they have a big ol' stereo and a playlist that is exclusively '90 pop and club music. It's great!

I had an MRI the other day and they asked what I wanted to listen to. Whatever they chose because I said "some nineties poo poo" was awesome and it played Jane's Addiction twice (okay once it was Porno For Pyros but same thing). Hearing Pets while getting the scan was hilarious.

# ? Mar 30, 2024 20:57

Akumu: Apr 24, 2003

Mushmouth posted:

I had an MRI the other day and they asked what I wanted to listen to. Whatever they chose because I said "some nineties poo poo" was awesome and it played Jane's Addiction twice (okay once it was Porno For Pyros but same thing). Hearing Pets while getting the scan was hilarious.

That's against regulations, Pets can only be played during a PET scan.

# ? Mar 30, 2024 21:09

MagusofStars: Mar 31, 2012

AKA Pseudonym posted:

AITB for indicating that someone's music taste is embarrassing?
Stacey on the other hand is very eclectic. I have nothing against it. I listen to Taylor Swift to Mackelmore

I have nothing against ecletic music tastes, as evidence let me cite how my tastes range from "a current pop star with Top 40 chart-toppers" all the way to "a recent pop/hip-hop star with Top 40 chart-toppers". :rolleyes:

Also, loving lol at using whether a song shows up in a grocery store as a sign of the quality of the song. You heard it here first folks, your local Kroger is the best arbiter of musical taste in America.

Pookah posted:

In my local Tesco express, they have a big ol' stereo and a playlist that is exclusively '90 pop and club music. It's great!

Years ago, I worked at a restaurant with a similar "we rotate who gets to pick the music" rule and one person's playlist included a bunch of TV theme songs. You could always tell the people who were visiting for the first time because they'd hear the DuckTales theme song or whatever, then basically freeze for a second of "wait, is that...?" before bursting out laughing and/or singing along.

# ? Mar 30, 2024 21:14

Haschel Cedricson: Jan 4, 2006; Brinkmanship

AKA Pseudonym posted:

AITB for indicating that someone's music taste is embarrassing?

When I worked receiving at Walmart I was allowed to listen to music and my musical tastes are even more varied and eclectic than the ones in this story. At first I tried to only listen to music when there weren't other people around. By six months I was all "I hope you fuckers like Bjork because that's who you're getting today."

# ? Mar 30, 2024 21:14

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# ? May 30, 2024 22:49

Kitfox88: Aug 21, 2007; Anybody lose their glasses?

Haschel Cedricson posted:

When I worked receiving at Walmart I was allowed to listen to music and my musical tastes are even more varied and eclectic than the ones in this story. At first I tried to only listen to music when there weren't other people around. By six months I was all "I hope you fuckers like Bjork because that's who you're getting today."

Coworkers lucky Bill Saluga never had a musical career.

# ? Mar 30, 2024 21:21

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