r/relationships: SPRAYING A FRAGRANCE ON MY PENIS

The Something Awful Forums > Main > General Bullshit > r/relationships: SPRAYING A FRAGRANCE ON MY PENIS

idiotsavant: Jun 4, 2000

Shanghaied posted:

Australian motorsport fans screamed bloody murder when they limited the amount of alcohol you can bring to the Bathurst 1000 race to 24 cans of beer or 4 litres of wine per person per day.

4 liters is the equivalent of 5.3 normal bottles (750ml) btw

# ? Apr 5, 2024 18:00

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# ? May 21, 2024 09:51

ExcessBLarg!: Sep 1, 2001

Kurieg posted:

AITA for keeping my nephew's birthday gift, a PS5, since he broke my N64.

ESH but there's a thing here I didn't quite appreciate until I had my own kids:

Yes, you teach kids to respect property and to not throw things out of fits of frustration. However, young kids don't have developed impulse control and they often can't stop themselves from acting out in frustration. Like, yes, the entire point here is to teach them so they learn to get better about it, but you have to expect and anticipate incidents.

This is why you don't hand your invaluable vintage consoles to a child. Or if you do, you need to do it under the conditions that they're going to have an enjoyable un-frustrating experience, meaning you don't kick their rear end in Mario Kart. Give them the win, help make a memory they will cherish.

# ? Apr 5, 2024 18:10

John Wick of Dogs: Mar 4, 2017; A real hellraiser

Incorrect, pick Yoshi and Wario Coliseum and take that really easy shortcut that skips 2/3 the track and finish before they complete a lap

# ? Apr 5, 2024 18:14

Shanghaied: Oct 12, 2004; BIG PAD

A former coworker's ex boyfriend drank a box of white wine a day (3 litres). He managed to hold down a high-paying job and everything (hyperbaric and underwater welding). On the flip side, he went to jail after they broke up and he tried to murder her and the friend she was with at the time.

Shanghaied fucked around with this message at 18:22 on Apr 5, 2024

# ? Apr 5, 2024 18:18

Kurieg: Jul 19, 2012; RIP Lutri: 5/19/20-4/2/20

You'd expect a young kid to throw a controller. Walking up to the console and slamming it so hard it shuts off and the case breaks is a level of impulse the aunt probably wasn't ready for.

# ? Apr 5, 2024 18:19

Biplane: Jul 18, 2005

It's funny when alcoholics are like "yeah honestly 12 drinks during dinner isn't that bad, I do that and no one could tell/I was barely buzzed" you morons, EVERYONE can tell, every time.

# ? Apr 5, 2024 18:20

John Wick of Dogs: Mar 4, 2017; A real hellraiser

I can't tell, I ignore things that would be sad to think about

# ? Apr 5, 2024 18:24

BOOTY-ADE: Aug 30, 2006; BIG KOOL TELLIN' Y'ALL TO KEEP IT TIGHT

Extra Large Marge posted:

Hello, these are my children, Jezebel and Kotaku

My twins, Slagatha & Strumpet

# ? Apr 5, 2024 18:24

titty_baby_: Nov 11, 2015

at the very least everyone can.smell

# ? Apr 5, 2024 18:26

Larry Cum Free: Jun 3, 2022; move it or lose it dillweed

ExcessBLarg! posted:

ESH but there's a thing here I didn't quite appreciate until I had my own kids:

Yes, you teach kids to respect property and to not throw things out of fits of frustration. However, young kids don't have developed impulse control and they often can't stop themselves from acting out in frustration. Like, yes, the entire point here is to teach them so they learn to get better about it, but you have to expect and anticipate incidents.

This is why you don't hand your invaluable vintage consoles to a child. Or if you do, you need to do it under the conditions that they're going to have an enjoyable un-frustrating experience, meaning you don't kick their rear end in Mario Kart. Give them the win, help make a memory they will cherish.

We had an NES when I was like 4 years old and I never would have considered smashing out of frustration. I knew I would be lucky to be very severely punished by my parents if I did, because that means I didn't get immediately murdered by my older siblings. You anticipate a kid being clumsy or careless and wrecking something expensive, but intentionally destroying it is a different story. By the time a kid has the physical strength and coordination to destroy a game console, they have the impulse control to not do it.

# ? Apr 5, 2024 18:26

Mordiceius: Nov 10, 2007; If you think calling me names is gonna get a rise out me, think again. I like my life as an idiot!

ExcessBLarg! posted:

ESH but there's a thing here I didn't quite appreciate until I had my own kids:

When I was a kid, my brother and I would play NES/SNES/N64 games and there were more than a few times than we got so angry with each other, we fought. Never once did either of us ever pick up a loving console and smash it on table.

If your kids are likely to pick up expensive items and smash them in frustration... you might be a lovely parent, sorry dude.

# ? Apr 5, 2024 18:29

mystes: May 31, 2006

I think the brother should be less concerned about the ps5 and more concerned about the fact that kid is smashing stuff when he gets frustrated

I'm also curious about the age of the kid and whether he was apologetic although that's not really that relevant to the actual question I guess

# ? Apr 5, 2024 18:36

Mordiceius: Nov 10, 2007; If you think calling me names is gonna get a rise out me, think again. I like my life as an idiot!

mystes posted:

I think the brother should be less concerned about the ps5 and more concerned about the fact that kid is smashing stuff when he gets frustrated

I'm also curious about the age of the kid and whether he was apologetic although that's not really that relevant to the actual question I guess

quote:

I gave my nephew a $50 gift certificate for Nintendo for his birthday. I had checked with my brother in advance about his first gift to make sure he and his wife were okay with it so he was expecting the PS5. My brother not my nephew. My nephew thanked me for the $50 and apologized for getting upset and breaking my N64.

The kid is more mature than the brother.

# ? Apr 5, 2024 18:37

BAGS FLY AT NOON: Apr 6, 2011; A Soft Nylon Bag

The aunt is kind of an rear end in a top hat for being smug about beating a kid at Mario kart

# ? Apr 5, 2024 18:38

Ominous Jazz: Jun 15, 2011; Big D is chillin' over here
Wasteland style

ExcessBLarg! posted:

Give them the win, help make a memory they will cherish.

that's why cats (including lions) will let kittens win in play fights. it builds confidence and enjoyment in a hobby (like video games and chasing gazelle)

# ? Apr 5, 2024 18:38

mystes: May 31, 2006

Mordiceius posted:

The kid is more mature than the brother.

oh I missed that. It's so dumb for the brother to try to undermine the OP for trying to teach the kid a lesson in a very mild way too

# ? Apr 5, 2024 18:39

coronatae: Oct 14, 2012

I once lost a race in Snowboard Kids 2 and got real mad and yanked the cartridge out of the console but that just froze the screen on the victory scene with the winning character :negative:

# ? Apr 5, 2024 18:42

Arsenic Lupin: Apr 12, 2012; This particularly rapid💨 unintelligible 😖patter💁 isn't generally heard🧏‍♂️, and if it is🤔, it doesn't matter💁.

Via Carolyn Hax.

quote:

Dear Carolyn: I consider myself a good feminist, so I normally avoid talking in terms of gender roles, yet here I am. Is it the role of a wife and mother to help bridge a rift between a father and his grown sons?

When I have an argument with one of my sons, leading us to not communicate for a time, she just goes merrily along as if it�s none of her business. Sometimes a son needs to have explained how his actions hurt his dad, and sometimes Dad needs to be told why those actions were important to the son.

Sure, the guys should man up and talk it out, but men have egos, and you know in the real world sometimes people retreat into stubborn silence and resentment.

I�m not talking about Mom/wife taking sides, but about being a conciliator. Frankly, this attitude that she�s not involved in these two people�s sadness or happiness is one reason we�re separated (friendly) and slow-walking to a divorce.

� Functional Single Parent

quote:

Functional Single Parent: I consider myself a good masculist, yet here I am: Your �men have egos� has me rethinking my policy against falling off my chair in fits of snark.

# ? Apr 5, 2024 18:43

Larry Cum Free: Jun 3, 2022; move it or lose it dillweed

Ominous Jazz posted:

that's why cats (including lions) will let kittens win in play fights. it builds confidence and enjoyment in a hobby (like video games and chasing gazelle)

My dog didn't let my kitten win play fights and it just made her more determined.

# ? Apr 5, 2024 18:44

Lager: Mar 9, 2004; Give me the secret to the anti-puppet equation!

Larry Cum Free posted:

My dog didn't let my kitten win play fights and it just made her more determined.

Dogs will do so with each other, as will wolves. I never thought about whether they'll do that cross species.

# ? Apr 5, 2024 18:50

Benagain: Oct 10, 2007; Can you see that I am serious?; Fun Shoe

Arsenic Lupin posted:

Via Carolyn Hax.

why isn't my wife, who I'm in the middle of getting divorced from, telling my son to talk to me after a fight we had? women amirite?

# ? Apr 5, 2024 18:50

mystes: May 31, 2006

I consider myself a good feminist but isn't it a woman's job to...

# ? Apr 5, 2024 18:52

Kurieg: Jul 19, 2012; RIP Lutri: 5/19/20-4/2/20

I consider myself a good feminist but also all men have intractable egos that require female mediation.

# ? Apr 5, 2024 18:53

mailorder bees: Nov 4, 2011; FLUFFERNUTTER

coronatae posted:

I once lost a race in Snowboard Kids 2 and got real mad and yanked the cartridge out of the console but that just froze the screen on the victory scene with the winning character

snowboard kids 2 IS the dark souls of video games

# ? Apr 5, 2024 18:56

Biplane: Jul 18, 2005

mailorder bees posted:

snowboard kids 2 IS the dark souls of video games

# ? Apr 5, 2024 18:57

Shanghaied: Oct 12, 2004; BIG PAD

All women have achieved transcendence and ego-death. Only stupid men have egos.

# ? Apr 5, 2024 18:59

Pope Corky the IX: Dec 18, 2006; What are you looking at?

mystes posted:

I consider myself a good feminist but isn't it a woman's job to...

# ? Apr 5, 2024 19:02

Modal Auxiliary: Jan 14, 2005

mystes posted:

I consider myself a good feminist but isn't it a woman's job to...

# ? Apr 5, 2024 19:03

Kurieg: Jul 19, 2012; RIP Lutri: 5/19/20-4/2/20

is that too long for a thread title?

# ? Apr 5, 2024 19:11

Pope Corky the IX: Dec 18, 2006; What are you looking at?

r/relationships: I consider myself a good feminist�yet here I am

# ? Apr 5, 2024 19:14

Zoesdare: Sep 24, 2005; Still floofin

mystes posted:

I consider myself a good feminist but isn't it a woman's job to...

I know we just got a new title, but PLEASE???

# ? Apr 5, 2024 19:19

Lottery of Babylon: Apr 25, 2012; STRAIGHT TROPIN'

cat botherer posted:

or my niece, The Whore of Babylon

You rang?

AITA for jokingly telling my sister that she'll make a great housewife?

quote:

I (33M) have a younger sister (25F). Our parents are dangerous people, so as soon as I was able, I rented out a place so that my sister and I could have somewhere to live. We got out of there when I was 18 and she was 10, and I took care of her until she was able to go to college (she is now in graduate school, doing very well for herself).

Basically, I�m not the most well-organized guy. I mean of course I take my job seriously (I work as a paramedic, and I aspire to go to med school soon, and I am responsible for peoples� safety), but my primary motivation is making a living and breaking the cycle. I don�t put too much effort into things like looking presentable, or cleaning around the house or whatever. I�m too busy for that. So I admit that while my little sister was growing up, she was more often than not the one who washed the dishes and cleaned the floors. Even nowadays, she spends her money on nice clothes for me and whenever she visits my apartment, she scolds me as if I�m a little kid and she cleans up the mess. It�s kind of amusing.

So last weekend, my sister visited me, and once again, she rolled up her sleeves and started tidying up the place a little bit while we were chatting. While she was doing that, I jokingly told her that she would make a great housewife, and that she should aim to find a job like a flight attendant or something where she could put her neat-freak talents to use. My sister was sort of embarrassed when I said this, and her face turned red. She went on this whole rant about how this wasn�t what she was going to grad school for, and then she entered my bedroom and freaked out when she saw the new clothes she bought for me, just laid out all messy on the floor. It was enough that she even started crying! She was so exasperated, and all she could say was "you're supposed to be an adult". AITA?

# ? Apr 5, 2024 19:19

Beachcomber: May 21, 2007; Another day in paradise.; Slippery Tilde

Lottery of Babylon posted:

You rang?

AITA for jokingly telling my sister that she'll make a great housewife?

At that particular moment, he was engaging in assholish tendencies, without necessarily being one full time.

# ? Apr 5, 2024 19:25

CannonFodder: Jan 26, 2001; Passion’s Wrench

idiotsavant posted:

4 liters is the equivalent of 5.3 normal bottles (750ml) btw

And because we are talking about a road race in Australia, 4 liters is also the amount in a Goon bag, the bag part of boxed wine, which was also invented* in Australia.

*wine skins made of animal hide have been around about as long as wine, it's just that an Aussie put it in a modern version that became really popular.

# ? Apr 5, 2024 19:27

quantumwell: Jun 22, 2013

Lottery of Babylon posted:

AITA for jokingly telling my sister that she'll make a great housewife?

This guy is a total slob and would probably leave surgical instruments in you during an operation

# ? Apr 5, 2024 19:29

CannonFodder: Jan 26, 2001; Passion’s Wrench

Lottery of Babylon posted:

AITA for jokingly telling my sister that she'll make a great housewife?
AITA?

No, you are not the adult.

# ? Apr 5, 2024 19:29

mystes: May 31, 2006

Lottery of Babylon posted:

AITA for jokingly telling my sister that she'll make a great housewife?

This is one of the ones where you only have to read the title

# ? Apr 5, 2024 19:41

Hughlander: May 11, 2005

AITA for returning gifts to my family and asking them to leave after they insulted my daughter's name?

quote:

I (26f) gave birth to my first child three weeks ago, my daughter, and my family are not happy with the name I chose. My parents and siblings had wanted me to name my daughter Agatha or Agnes because those are family name and part of a theme my family keeps, where the oldest girl and the youngest girl pass the initials of their name to their children and because my name also begins with an A, they had wanted me to do this, as the youngest. My oldest sister followed the tradition. My mothers oldest and youngest sisters did, my cousins did it. But my husband and I did not want to follow the tradition and we didn't want a classic name for our baby anyway.

We chose the name Indie for our daughter. I had told my family during my pregnancy that I was not using Agatha or Agnes or an A name for my baby. I told them more than once in fact. For some reason they decided Agatha would be the name.

When my daughter was born and my family came to visit us at the hospital (I had a c-section and was in the hospital for a few days afterward) they were shocked by the name we chose. They asked me what I was thinking going for a name like that and then told me I had broken the tradition for some weird name that doesn't make sense. My husband asked them to leave the hospital if they couldn't keep their opinions to themselves.

They apologized which I believed was sincere and they came to our house with gifts. But when I saw the gifts I noticed anything personalized had the name Agatha on it. And when I asked about it they told me Agatha was a much better name and surely I didn't want my daughter to have a dumb modern name like Indie. My mom told me she could not understand me picking such a hideous name and she said my husband and most of my friends had set bad examples with their names but I should stick to classics because they are classic for a reason. She told me they would never be able to accept the name Indie in the family.

I returned all the gifts to their packaging and returned them to my family before asking them to leave. I told them they did not get to insult my daughter's name, again, and push so hard for us to change the name we as her parents had decided on. My recovery from surgery has been slow so my husband was the one to make sure they actually left. But they were upset that I was responding to them like I was. They told me I should have been more honest about the name earlier and I was punishing them for thinking more of my daughter than my husband and I were.

I do feel bad for returning the gifts and kicking them out and the number of texts they have sent since tell me they don't like it either. But AITA?

Indie was the dogs name.

# ? Apr 5, 2024 20:09

Big Bowie Bonanza: Dec 30, 2007; please tell me where i can date this cute boy

AITAH for not telling people at my new job that my wife is bi?

quote:

My wife (36F) and I (35M) have been married for a little more than 5 years. She realized she was bisexual last year and came out to me and our friends and families earlier this year. I started a new job in March and my wife asked if I would be comfortable telling my new coworkers that she is bisexual.

I told her I�d think about it and see what the vibe is at the office. To me, that doesn�t seem like it�s anyone�s business, and I can also see how that might be inappropriate or creep people out.

My wife and I had another conversation about it tonight and it got heated when I told her I still haven�t told anyone at my job. It�s not relevant to my job, there hasn�t been an opening to bring it up naturally in conversation, and it really doesn�t seem like any of their business to me. She asked if I�m ashamed of her, and I said no, because I�m not. She said it feels like I �don�t really believe� she�s bisexual, and I said I�m sorry she feels that way because of course I believe her, I have no reason not to. I said I just don�t think it�s anyone�s business. She told me she�s already out to her boss and coworkers. I said I was glad for that her coming out to her coworkers, who she�s known for years now, is different than me outing her when I haven�t even been at my job for four whole weeks yet.

We went back and forth and back and forth and back and forth like this for more than an hour before we called a time out and she went to bed and I went for a walk.

It�s not that I�m ashamed. It�s not that I think she�s lying for attention. It�s not even that I think either of us will get judged or treated unfairly for it. It�s just that I don�t think it�s anyone�s business and it would be weird to just say that out of the blue. My direct boss and two senior people on my team are also women and I don�t want them to think I�m proposing anything weird or inappropriate by telling them (my wife says that�s ridiculous, but I know that if a woman I barely knew told me out of the blue that her husband was bisexual I would think she was trying to set something up).

Am I the rear end in a top hat here? I love my wife and do support her, but her being bi has nothing to do with my job and there honestly hasn�t been any kind of organic opening in a conversation at work where me telling everyone about it would make any sense. I told her I�d put up a bisexual flag pin during Pride Month, but she just rolled her eyes at that. Should I be doing more?

Thanks for reading.

bi wife so what

# ? Apr 5, 2024 20:15

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# ? May 21, 2024 09:51

Pantaloon Pontiff: Jun 25, 2023

John Wick of Dogs posted:

The bed in his guest room should be comfortable.

Not the issue really, but why is your guest bed uncomfortable

Actual answer from an 'uncomfortable guest bed haver': The guest bed is a frame I got from my grandmother years ago that I put a cheap mattress on. It mostly gets used to hold assorted junk before it gets sorted and put away or gotten rid of, it's only about once a year that someone sleeps in it. It's not worth paying for a good mattress for. A lot of other people that I know have their old, worn-out mattress on the guest bed since they don't want to spring for another new mattress and the old one is better than whatever was on it before.

I think a lot of people have a guest bedroom that's really more of a hobby/storage room 363 or so nights out of the year so just have a 'whatever is cheapest' mattress on the bed.

# ? Apr 5, 2024 20:16

The Something Awful Forums > Main > General Bullshit > r/relationships: SPRAYING A FRAGRANCE ON MY PENIS

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