r/relationships: he's just soggy moldy baby carrot

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Shanghaied: Oct 12, 2004; BIG PAD

greazeball posted:

Florida + tech = crypto

Ah yes, of course.

My steam-cooled mining farm in the Everglades is secured with gators.

# ? May 2, 2024 06:27

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# ? Jun 11, 2024 08:35

Ghost Leviathan: Mar 2, 2017; Exploration is ill-advised.

I feel like a lot of these Cunning Plans seem to revolve around the assumption that everyone else involved is also an idiot drama elemental looking for an excuse to go off like a roman candle at the first provocation, and stall at any other reaction, like being remotely reasonable.

# ? May 2, 2024 06:30

boofhead: Feb 18, 2021

Ghost Leviathan posted:

I feel like a lot of these Cunning Plans seem to revolve around the assumption that everyone else involved is also an idiot drama elemental looking for an excuse to go off like a roman candle at the first provocation, and stall at any other reaction, like being remotely reasonable.

not necessarily, sometimes they're just super manipulative or even straight up sociopathic!

you just reminded me -- years ago i was out with a couple work colleagues and one of them was venting about how she loves her current boyfriend, but misses sex with her ex boyfriend. then explains in careful detail over like 10 minutes how he's coming here soon on holiday, and so she's going to convince him to move to our city for her so they can gently caress, meanwhile she'll work on convincing her current boyfriend to open up their relationship because she knows he loves her and won't sleep with other people and she knows exactly how to manipulate him etc to make that happen, so she can still hook up with the ex and i guess anybody else she's had her eye on

i just stare at her and go "holy poo poo, [name]. next girlfriend i get i'm going to introduce you to them, and if they like you, i'm breaking up with them immediately". i havent talked to her since, and avoided her when we met at a festival later on, but im hoping she was just engaging in idle horny fantasies, cos the way she was describing the exact methods she'd use to manipulate her loving boyfriend was cooold

# ? May 2, 2024 08:11

FMguru: Sep 10, 2003; peed on;
sexually

In which someone pulls off the "you hijacked my big event, so I'll hijack yours" maneuver

AITA for announcing my pregnancy at my best friend�s wedding

quote:

I (24F) recently discovered that I�m expecting my first child. My best friend, we�ll call her "Laura," (23F) and I have shared every significant life moment since we met in college. I got married two years ago to Laura�s brother, and at my wedding Laura announced her engagement to my brother during the reception. I was genuinely thrilled for her, I�ve always thought of Laura as a sister and now we truly were and I really didn�t mind at all that she shared her big news; it felt like our joys were intertwined.

Last weekend was Laura and my Brothers wedding, and it seemed like a beautiful circle of life moment. Throughout the wedding and reception, a few close friends began to notice that I wasn�t drinking and started whispering guesses about my pregnancy. It felt like my news was already halfway out there, so after the speeches, I made a toast. I expressed my deep happiness for Laura and my brother, then, feeling the moment was right and following the precedent she had set at my wedding, I shared that I was expecting. Both our family�s were so excited because this is the first grandchild on both sides of the family, and after a handful of hugs and congratulations I feel like the celebration shifted back to Laura and my brother.

I thought Laura would be excited, but instead, she seemed upset. She pulled me aside after the toast and expressed that she felt I had chosen her special day to make a personal announcement, overshadowing her celebration. This reaction stunned me, especially since she had made a similar announcement at my wedding�a moment I had embraced wholeheartedly, sharing in her happiness.

Laura has been distant since, and my brother has even spoken to me since the wedding, and I�ve been left questioning my decision. I thought that since I didn�t mind sharing my special day, she would feel the same. Our mutual friends are divided; some think it was a sweet continuation of sharing life�s milestones, while others side with Laura, feeling the timing was inappropriate.

So, AITA for announcing my pregnancy at Laura�s wedding reception, especially considering the history and the fact that people were already suspecting and whispering about it?

Edit to clarify: Laura, Me, Her brother and my brother are all close in age and spent a lot of time together in college, we went to college in a smaller town, and the four of us pretty much only spent time with each other, thus why we were close enough to marry each others brothers.

Also if she hadn�t married my brother and I hadn�t married hers I would not have felt comfortable announcing my pregnancy. But since my baby�s entire family on both sides were there I felt like it made sense.

Turnabout is a bitch, isn't it Laura?

# ? May 2, 2024 08:16

3D Megadoodoo: Nov 25, 2010

Weddings should be illegal. Just get married at the magistrate and gently caress off home or the pub like normal people so there'll be no god drat stupid-rear end drama.

# ? May 2, 2024 08:21

ilmucche: Mar 16, 2016; What did you say the strategy was?

3D Megadoodoo posted:

Weddings should be illegal. Just get married at the magistrate and gently caress off home or the pub like normal people so there'll be no god drat stupid-rear end drama.

Sign the papers and have a party with your friends

# ? May 2, 2024 08:25

AceClown: Sep 11, 2005

John Wick of Dogs posted:

Does anyone have a legitimate reason to do this other than working in national security or regularly attending protests?

my wife does this with everything not just texts, it's personal emails, work emails, whatsapp convos and standard SMS's

She just cannot stand to have things she's dealt with already hanging around, and no, it's nothing to do with cheating, it's just how she is.

She even throws boxes away! perfectly good boxes and boxes for electronics

# ? May 2, 2024 08:57

Barudak: May 7, 2007

A former boss of mine deleted all work emails after they "finished them" and was flabbergasted that apparently this might be a crime???

# ? May 2, 2024 08:59

3D Megadoodoo: Nov 25, 2010

Why wouldn't I delete texts :confused:

Usually I delete them before even reading them because if it had been important, they would've written a letter or something.

# ? May 2, 2024 09:01

Hughlander: May 11, 2005

Debated posting this here or in the Bad With Money thread...

AITA for giving my fiance my ring back because he closed on a house without telling me?

quote:

I (44F) have been with my fiance (46M) for 13 years, and we have been engaged for 4, and have 3 kids (10F, 8F, 3F) together.

After a lot of obstacles and two periods ( before our engagement) where we decided to not officially break up, but take a break from each other, we had set a wedding date that was supposed to be for this June.

My fiance has a lot of baggage from his childhood and doesn't do well with frustration- he's a self proclaimed " avoidant introvert." I also have had childhood issues where my parents always made me feel guilty about how much I " cost" and never would give me any money to get new shoes, which got me excluded by my peers ( yes I have been in very therapy about this).

I work as a front desk agent at a hotel, and used to work as a member of the concierge staff at a condo. My fiance is the main breadwinner in our household and I never felt comfortable sharing my financial struggles because he was so perfect at everything.

My fiance talked throughout our relationship about buying a home and investing in a fixer uppers ( he works for a real estate investment firm).

But long story short a year and a half ago I needed to file for bankruptcy. I was dealing with having creditors overdrafting my accounts and Discover suing me so I decided the responsible thing to do was file.

It caused a lot of tension, but he said he didn't want to back out of this wedding because he didn't want our daughters to think he gave up when things were hard.

However, we hit another bad period after he found out a credit union denied my application for an account due to a Chexsystems report. He's told me that we will still own a house together someday, but that family home won't be for another 4-5 years.

Then three weeks ago he breaks it to me that he had been in the process of closing on a property. It's a duplex, but many people use half of a duplex as a family home, and own it with their spouse. He admits that he would have wanted my name on it before the bankruptcy. I was furious, but instead of being sorry he said that if we wanted this to work, he needed me to verbally affirm that I understood and accept why he didn't involve me in this purchase.

I was speechless and walked away. It was a huge breach of trust and I don't think it's unreasonable to say I deserve a better man than someone who'd do that, and that if he really loved and trusted me like he said in therapy he wouldn't have done this. I ended up giving him the ring back out of anger.

I regret doing that now, but we got in another fight after he refused to even tell me what he did with the ring. I told him I deserved better than a man who'd just shut his partner out of finances and get so cold after a fight. I told him to leave the house for a while, but he just moved back in. Yet he said he wants us to tell the girls the wedding is off and that he's here to ease the transition and offered pay the rent until the lease is up, but will find somewhere else for him to stay.

Comments make the post of course...

quote:

He said it's due to my bankruptcy and the fact that I hadn't cleared up my Chexsystems issues ( it had to do with a sudden overdraft that caused my account to go under by $400 due to a rogue creditor). Long story short, he values money over the relationship we had and cares more about a mortgage broker thinking my history is " sordid" than building a future together.

And in all honesty, likely the fact that one particular creditor that sued me publically is a well known payday lender and apparently the butt of many jokes in terms of interest rates.

I feel I deserve a better man than somebody who would throw me under the bus for his own financial benefit because of " reputation" or feeling like others might judge me for my mistakes. Somebody who'd understand that financial mistakes happen, and still want to buy a house for me and our kids regardless because love trumps finances.
---
We shared finances for common expenses like vacations and he paid for most of the rent since we needed to live in a safe place for our kids.

But again, he sometimes acts like Mr. Infalliable so I was afraid to tell him about my spending mistakes and my anxieties which got me caught up in loans that I was ashamed to tell him about.

I was too embarassed to let him know I took out loans that I thought ( due to less financial literacy) were small but had the maximum legal amount of interest. Basically predatory payday lenders ( plus Discover) all of whom were like vultures in terms of trying to rat me out to my employer by threatening to garnish wages, and garnish bank accounts.

He's holding worst of the all the fact that a bank won't allow me to open a new account because of an archaic Chexsystems reporting system thing is blocking me from doing so against me.
---
He'll be alone with all his money and I'll find somebody who acutally wants to plan a future with me, including buying a house together, investing in things together, raising our kids togehter.

You act like there's no men out there who would be willing to share with his partner and their kids or that my ex is the only one who can afford a house for a family. Which he's clearly against anyway.
---
It's not nonense and don't you dare act like there's just no other options for me out there who would be willing to buy a house with a woman they claim to love and their 3 kids.
---
Well to be fair he's setting the bar low. You act like there's no other men out there who would be willing to buy a house and include their partner in it, regardless of how much their partner is able to afford.

With how my ex is doing, he better hope his duplex and six figure salary keeps him warm at night.
---
He's more concerned about a mortgage lender judging him because of me than building our future together. Love should trump finances. Again, I feel I deserve a better man than the character he's shown me, and how this also affects our kids, with him putting off buying a house for all of us.

Maybe it's a good thing that he's shown his colors since with my friends when they broke up their fiances still let them keep the ring to do with it what they wanted. Instead he complains I don't have money, yet keeps things of value from me.

I feel a partner that I deserve wouldn't do that to me or to our kids.
---
He did that because if he told me, I would have told him obviously don't do it because an investment like that is typically a family investment and should not be a sly premarital asset he deliberately is trying to withhold from me. But I guess money trumps all, and if he thinks he deserves better than I shouldn't be reviled for saying I deserve a better man too. Somebody who would understand that financial problems happen, and would be happy to invest in a house for me and our 3 kids. But I guess money wins for him, and we might as well just be done with each other then while we are still young and can find other and better partners for each other because people who like money like that always end up without a quality partner.

If we could figure out a way of turning entitlement into electricity we'd solve the worlds energy issues.

# ? May 2, 2024 09:10

Jack-Off Lantern: Mar 2, 2012

3D Megadoodoo posted:

Weddings should be illegal. Just get married at the magistrate and gently caress off home or the pub like normal people so there'll be no god drat stupid-rear end drama.

It's what I did, except we couldn't even go to the pub cause COVID

# ? May 2, 2024 09:36

StrangersInTheNight: Dec 31, 2007; ABSOLUTE FUCKING GUDGEON

3D Megadoodoo posted:

Weddings should be illegal. Just get married at the magistrate and gently caress off home or the pub like normal people so there'll be no god drat stupid-rear end drama.

one of the more annoying parts of my quick marriage in nyc was that I couldn't just go get the certificate and be done with it, you legally have to have a ceremony of some type where someone ordained to do so marries you & you sign the certificate in front of the world/god - basically, your witness

you literally can't just get the license at the courthouse and be done with it, they've made having the ceremony an inherent part of it legally 'counting' as a marriage, ugh.

StrangersInTheNight fucked around with this message at 10:00 on May 2, 2024

# ? May 2, 2024 09:56

Jack-Off Lantern: Mar 2, 2012

StrangersInTheNight posted:

one of the more annoying parts of my quick marriage in nyc was that I couldn't just go get the certificate and be done with it, you legally have to have a ceremony of some type where someone ordained to do so marries you & you sign the certificate in front of the world/god - basically, your witness

you literally can't just get the license and be done with it, they've made having the ceremony an inherent part of it legally 'counting' as a marriage, ugh

Sounds like a scam, OP

# ? May 2, 2024 09:57

StrangersInTheNight: Dec 31, 2007; ABSOLUTE FUCKING GUDGEON

Jack-Off Lantern posted:

Sounds like a scam, OP

yeah it sure does but

https://www.nycbar.org/get-legal-help/article/family-law/marriage-is-a-contract/

quote:

In order to enter into a valid marriage in New York, you must obtain a marriage license and have the marriage ceremony conducted by a person who is allowed to perform such ceremonies. First, you must apply for and obtain a valid marriage license from a town or city clerk in New York. Then, you must deliver the license within 60 days to the clergy member or magistrate who will perform the marriage ceremony.

so loving stupid

they do offer allowing that ceremony at the city court house, but if you want to do it in one day, it means you have to get city clerk's office for the certificate early enough you can get through that line and then get into the second line for the ceremony process at the courthouse.

StrangersInTheNight fucked around with this message at 10:02 on May 2, 2024

# ? May 2, 2024 10:00

Jack-Off Lantern: Mar 2, 2012

Can't people get ordained as an evangelical minister with the power invested Yada Yada with an online course?

# ? May 2, 2024 10:02

keep punching joe: Jan 22, 2006; Die Satan!

My email account is so overrun with spam that I usually just go in and delete all the unread emails once a year without reading any of them.

# ? May 2, 2024 10:04

StrangersInTheNight: Dec 31, 2007; ABSOLUTE FUCKING GUDGEON

Jack-Off Lantern posted:

Can't people get ordained as an evangelical minister with the power invested Yada Yada with an online course?

nope - to officiate weddings in nyc, you have to register with the office of the city clerk to officiate weddings and pay a fee, and then you are granted a govt officiant number. granted, the fee is only $15, it's more that it's a hassle and obviously, it's not an immediate process like the on-line ones.

so yea, in ny state you literally have to get a ceremony performed by someone who is registered in this system or the marriage is not considered legally valid. I was so incensed by learning that and it still pisses me off to this day. I ended up finding a registered officiant online paying them $200 to meet me and a couple of friends on a rooftop another friend had access to but really, I should not have had to. My partner & I should've been allowed to just sign the certificate at the city clerk's office and viola we're legally married.

StrangersInTheNight fucked around with this message at 10:23 on May 2, 2024

# ? May 2, 2024 10:06

3D Megadoodoo: Nov 25, 2010

StrangersInTheNight posted:

one of the more annoying parts of my quick marriage in nyc was that I couldn't just go get the certificate and be done with it, you legally have to have a ceremony of some type where someone ordained to do so marries you & you sign the certificate in front of the world/god - basically, your witness

you literally can't just get the license at the courthouse and be done with it, they've made having the ceremony an inherent part of it legally 'counting' as a marriage, ugh.

Sounds unconstitutional.

# ? May 2, 2024 10:22

3D Megadoodoo: Nov 25, 2010

Oh what wait a minute of course a marriage has to be overseen by someone who is legally allowed to do so. That's what the loving magistrate is there for. A license is a license. Like, you don't get a car just because you have a license.

# ? May 2, 2024 10:24

DreamingofRoses: Jun 27, 2013; Nap Ghost

3D Megadoodoo posted:

Weddings should be illegal. Just get married at the magistrate and gently caress off home or the pub like normal people so there'll be no god drat stupid-rear end drama.

You vastly underestimate the occurrence of non-wedding drama. Or the fact that if a family/person/etc is dramatic enough that even a five minute ceremony at the courthouse can be interrupted.

# ? May 2, 2024 10:36

3D Megadoodoo: Nov 25, 2010

DreamingofRoses posted:

You vastly underestimate the occurrence of non-wedding drama. Or the fact that if a family/person/etc is dramatic enough that even a five minute ceremony at the courthouse can be interrupted.

Not if they aren't there.

# ? May 2, 2024 10:37

StrangersInTheNight: Dec 31, 2007; ABSOLUTE FUCKING GUDGEON

it doesn't have to be a magistrate who does it, just someone legally recognized by the magistrate. if all it takes to be able to officiate is the $15 form there's no reason they can't grant officiating powers to the people at the city clerk's offices who make the license and you can't just pay an additional fee to have them officiate right there with a witness you brought. buuut there's also a 24 hr waiting period after getting the certificate before you're allowed to be married, to make sure you can't rush to do both same day (you could get that waived by making your case to a judge, hence the courthouse line)

StrangersInTheNight fucked around with this message at 10:47 on May 2, 2024

# ? May 2, 2024 10:40

ilmucche: Mar 16, 2016; What did you say the strategy was?

Vegas is really the model we should all aim for really. Certificate and marriage all sorted out by someone dressed up as Elvis on site, available at 2am if needed

# ? May 2, 2024 10:46

DreamingofRoses: Jun 27, 2013; Nap Ghost

3D Megadoodoo posted:

Not if they aren't there.

That�s assuming that they wouldn�t show up anyway. Or set people calling the couple or whatever of the other 500 lovely things that people do to others when weddings aren�t involved. Might as well ban any sort of family get togethers.

Hughlander posted:

Debated posting this here or in the Bad With Money thread...

AITA for giving my fiance my ring back because he closed on a house without telling me?

Comments make the post of course...

If we could figure out a way of turning entitlement into electricity we'd solve the worlds energy issues.

This woman is so bad with money and he is 100% right to keep their finances separate but the line:

quote:

I was furious, but instead of being sorry he said that if we wanted this to work, he needed me to verbally affirm that I understood and accept why he didn't involve me in this purchase.

bothers me for some reason. And buying a house without telling your long term partner earlier in the process (before closing) seems kind of shady too. They both need to get away from each other and this woman needs a financial literacy course and better therapy.

# ? May 2, 2024 10:51

Pope Corky the IX: Dec 18, 2006; What are you looking at?

BrigadierSensible posted:

I was raised and tauggt that it was not rude, or untoward in any way to fart. So long as yo admitted it was you with a loud and clear "Pardon me" preceding your flatulence.

This made the fart normal and indeed stripped it of a lot of its naughtiness/funniness.

Also meant i got in 'trouble' a lot forletting a loud one rip, and when eveeyone was outraged,going "What? I said pardon me."

BrigadierSensible posted:

Yeah, when i hear the name "silas" I think of my brothers mate from primary school. Or that it sounds dickensian, and olde worlde posh.

Other than that,its a perfectly normal, innofensive name.

Is there any particular reason you�ve been posting as though you have an untreated head injury?

# ? May 2, 2024 10:56

3D Megadoodoo: Nov 25, 2010

Pope Corky the IX posted:

Is there any particular reason you�ve been posting as though you have an untreated head injury?

Pardon them.

# ? May 2, 2024 11:00

Ghost Leviathan: Mar 2, 2017; Exploration is ill-advised.

Also from a while back now, but it goes without saying that a prenup that isn't boring and relatively fair is bound to be thrown out by a judge in five minutes if challenged, right?

# ? May 2, 2024 11:44

MagusofStars: Mar 31, 2012

DreamingofRoses posted:

This woman is so bad with money and he is 100% right to keep their finances separate but the line:

bothers me for some reason. And buying a house without telling your long term partner earlier in the process (before closing) seems kind of shady too. They both need to get away from each other and this woman needs a financial literacy course and better therapy.

My guess for the home-buying is that he knew that (1) putting her dog-poo poo finances as a co-owner on the loan application would kill his chances of getting a loan BUT (2) she'd flip her poo poo about not being included on the loan application in the exact way she's showing in the comments - "he should be happy to invest in a house with me", "love should trump finances", "why does he care more about his mortgage broker than me", and so forth. So he didn't tell her in the process because he suspected (correctly!) that she'd gently caress it up.

No idea why he was seemingly still planning on getting married though. If you're at the point where you decide that you can't even trust her to have a reasonable adult discussion about it, why in the world were you going to get married and legally entwine your finances in (checks post) less than two months?

# ? May 2, 2024 11:51

DoctorTristan: Mar 11, 2006; I would look up into your lifeless eyes and wave, like this. Can you and your associates arrange that for me, Mr. Morden?

Hughlander posted:

Debated posting this here or in the Bad With Money thread...

AITA for giving my fiance my ring back because he closed on a house without telling me?

Comments make the post of course...

If we could figure out a way of turning entitlement into electricity we'd solve the worlds energy issues.

We need to set this financial genius up with Zaurg and get her a forums account

# ? May 2, 2024 11:54

3D Megadoodoo: Nov 25, 2010

DoctorTristan posted:

We need to set this financial genius up with Zaurg and get her a forums account

Plot twist: it's Zaurg.

# ? May 2, 2024 11:59

Steve Vader: Apr 29, 2005; Everyone's Playing!

I'd understand if that lady was pissed that she got no input or say in choosing the house he'd buy and they would live in together. He should have brought her in on that process at least, but with the understanding that her financial record is so hosed that her name can't be on any documents. But she seems specifically pissed that she doesn't get the asset, likely stemming from her lifelong financial terror.

Better therapy is right.

# ? May 2, 2024 12:11

DreamingofRoses: Jun 27, 2013; Nap Ghost

AITA for not telling my roommates I am the landlord?

quote:

I (F28) got a job when I was 17 and lived at home saving as much as I could until I was 26, at which point I bought a small apartment for myself with a small mortgage. (that I could afford whether I rented or not).

It has two rooms, one is bigger with an ensuite and the other is a single. I didn't want to live alone for safety reasons, so I posted about getting a roommate (them having the ensuite). I got lots of messages, but when people found out I was the landlord, they usually left the conversations. I was very upfront that I wanted clean/tidy/organised/quiet/non-drinking people and my sister said that was probably sending a 'toxic message' since I was also the landlord. So I stopped mentioning that and very shortly after I found people.

They're a really nice engaged couple (F29 and M28) and though I wouldn't say we are close best friends, but we are friendly, have dinner together sometimes and the living situation has been really nice. The rent was on the cheaper side of average in our area, we split bills, streaming and internet etc. But they did not know I was the landlord.

I will fully admit, I can be a strict. I hate things being messy/disorganised/loud, and especially since I am the owner I want things sorted quickly to avoid damages. So a few times I have scheduled "checks" to get things rolling if they're being pushed aside and mentioned I might have to complain if things weren't tidied up properly.

Recently, the girl had some health issues and has been working less, which means they have been struggling on rent payments. Again, I don't need their money to pay off the mortgage, but have been using it to help give me some extra money.

I decided to come clean and mentioned I would cut the rent payments fully until she got better and found stable work again. They were nice about it and took the deal until she got better. They then moved about last month and I went on the search for new roommates.

They started trashing me to everyone they knew about how I lied about being the landlord, was a strict pain in the rear end bitch, was trying to steal their money in a cost of living crisis to pay off my debts etc.

Word has gotten around and I've actually stopped taking enquires. Some of my friends and family members are saying I was an rear end in a top hat and should have been honest about it from the get go, others are saying I didn't owe them that information and ended up doing them a favour.

I don't really know what to believe. Was I the rear end in a top hat?

EDIT: They were paying for a single room together like what someone alone would have been paying, it wasn't doubled because they were two people, I didn't need the extra money, I just wanted to live with people to feel safer at home. What I was doing was legal where I am (I checked beforehand). No I wasn't ridiculously strict (they could have a drink, just not parties and big groups) and I did give good timelines for any 'inspections' far above the minimum requirement.

Just for clarity, for damages I meant things like a window being left open and it rained so water damage was a concern. Breaking the front door lock after using the wrong key and it needing replacing. Replacing their toaster because the wires were exposed and I was worried about a potential fire. Their habit of leaving the stove turned on with nothing on it.

Noise and stuff wasn't an issue, it was just something I put in the ad to deter party people. Mess only became an issue if it was left there for a few days/a week in communal areas and was getting in the way

# ? May 2, 2024 12:38

mystes: May 31, 2006

MagusofStars posted:

My guess for the home-buying is that he knew that (1) putting her dog-poo poo finances as a co-owner on the loan application would kill his chances of getting a loan BUT (2) she'd flip her poo poo about not being included on the loan application in the exact way she's showing in the comments - "he should be happy to invest in a house with me", "love should trump finances", "why does he care more about his mortgage broker than me", and so forth. So he didn't tell her in the process because he suspected (correctly!) that she'd gently caress it up.

No idea why he was seemingly still planning on getting married though. If you're at the point where you decide that you can't even trust her to have a reasonable adult discussion about it, why in the world were you going to get married and legally entwine your finances in (checks post) less than two months?

Not involving her in the financial stuff is clearly justified but totally excluding her from the process of looking for a house and just suddenly saying "I bought a house" does not seem good

# ? May 2, 2024 13:22

hawowanlawow: Jul 27, 2009

Hughlander posted:

Debated posting this here or in the Bad With Money thread...

AITA for giving my fiance my ring back because he closed on a house without telling me?

Comments make the post of course...

If we could figure out a way of turning entitlement into electricity we'd solve the worlds energy issues.

this woman literally doesn't understand what money is, she is like a five year old throwing a tantrum at the toy store. every comment is the same with the same emotional reaction.

never should have had three kids

# ? May 2, 2024 13:27

kdrudy: Sep 19, 2009

mystes posted:

Not involving her in the financial stuff is clearly justified but totally excluding her from the process of looking for a house and just suddenly saying "I bought a house" does not seem good

Honestly, based on her reaction there was no way they would ever be able to get a house if she was involved at all. They should really just not be together and he needs to accept she's a nightmare person unable to take actual responsibility for her life.

# ? May 2, 2024 13:29

mystes: May 31, 2006

DreamingofRoses posted:

AITA for not telling my roommates I am the landlord?

I don't understand how this is possible. How did they enter a lease without knowing who the landlord was? I guess they had no written lease agreement?

If they thought they were subletting from OP they still thought she was their landlord so it makes no difference.

Otherwise did she say she was collecting rent on behalf of the landlord or something? She still has to show them around when they were looking so I don't really understand how they could not at least see her as effectively the person on the lease they were subletting from

# ? May 2, 2024 13:33

Cloacamazing!: Apr 18, 2018; Too cute to be evil

DreamingofRoses posted:

AITA for not telling my roommates I am the landlord?

All Landlords Are Assholes and OP does sound neurotic, but the reaction was a bit overblown, let's keep reading...

quote:

Breaking the front door lock after using the wrong key and it needing replacing. Replacing their toaster because the wires were exposed and I was worried about a potential fire. Their habit of leaving the stove turned on with nothing on it.

What the everfucking gently caress

# ? May 2, 2024 13:33

3D Megadoodoo: Nov 25, 2010

kdrudy posted:

They should really just not be together

Maybe he loves her. What if she has good vibes?

# ? May 2, 2024 13:34

Ominous Jazz: Jun 15, 2011; Big D is chillin' over here
Wasteland style

DreamingofRoses posted:

AITA for not telling my roommates I am the landlord?

Automatically an rear end in a top hat because they're a landlord, but "I'm so overbearing that I have to lie about being the landlord for fear of my reputation" is pretty embarrassing. truly the lowest of the low, i do not believe them about the tenant

# ? May 2, 2024 13:41

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# ? Jun 11, 2024 08:35

mystes: May 31, 2006

3D Megadoodoo posted:

Maybe he loves her. What if she has good vibes?

I feel like the most charitable reading is that he has totally given up on her but puts up with her because she's the mother of his children

# ? May 2, 2024 13:43

The Something Awful Forums > Main > General Bullshit > r/relationships: he's just soggy moldy baby carrot

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