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According to legend, the original plan was that we would find out Vince had amnesia and was saved by some hobos at a railyard, and in exchange for saving his life, he trained them to be pro wrestlers. This muscular hobo army would be how he defeated HHH to get control of the company back.
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May 4, 2024 22:40
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Hobo Nation has nice ring to it.
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May 4, 2024 23:13
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Defiance Industries posted:According to legend, the original plan was that we would find out Vince had amnesia and was saved by some hobos at a railyard, and in exchange for saving his life, he trained them to be pro wrestlers. This muscular hobo army would be how he defeated HHH to get control of the company back. was he going to find a new muscular hobo, or was it going to be someone already involved with the wwf?
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May 4, 2024 23:38
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Cornwind Evil posted:Hey Gavok, list some of the truly ludicrous things the Flash has done in the comics. If he only had constant access to his power at 1/50th of the states he reached to do them, he'd still be virtually invincible. The Flash would be unstoppable if he also wasn't written and edited by people with a consistent inability to like anything made after their childhood, and thus cannot help themselves but put the ultimate nerf on the Flash, which is Being Barry Allen, the man who made a very stupid bet against Mr. Myxlplyx and therefore must timeshare his single braincell with Hal Jordan and, on every second day in May, Guy Gardner. As the Flash, Barry Allen has demonstrated the ability to vibrate at exactly the correct frequency to pass through dimensional barriers and subsequently elminate his electromagnetic interactions, making him intangible to all 'real' matter. It is a known fact that for all Flashes, being able to do so without causing the matter in question to violently explode after being passed through is the tricky part. There is of course Flashpoint, which is a 61 issue run of 'Barry Allen consistently makes the wrong decision and uses his powers irresponsibly', at the end of which the entire universe got rebooted. In matters of Pure Speed, there's the time where he, in '0.0001 microseconds' successfully transported half a million people to a hill 35 miles away from the epicenter of a nuclear bomb that just exploded, carrying them one or two at a time in an act that, in ballpark estimates, required him to travel about 13 trillion times the speed of light. Now all of these could be filed under 'going very fast is bullshit when you have a thing called the speed force that is basically magic and smoothes over any physical impossibilites and time and space don't matter', but anyone who didn't get to ignore physics as a secondary part of their powers would, by dint of physics, experience g forces. There has been a recorded instance of a human at Mach 0.9 sustaining 25 g's for 1.1 seconds and surviving with no ill effects, but g force is a function of time. Anyone running at that speed, which isn't even the speed of sound, would be experiencing it for far longer, and thus for a human to survive such an action they would by necessity probably be more durable than a tank to basically any kinetic weaponry you could throw at them. Which would make them about half as indestructible as The Hulkster and his 24-inch pythons, brotherrr.
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May 4, 2024 23:47
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16-bit Butt-Head posted:arnold's father was a nazi and arnold called him and the other nazis losers in his village losers that should have killed themselves This is the most I have ever identified with a celebrity.
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May 4, 2024 23:47
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Defiance Industries posted:According to legend, the original plan was that we would find out Vince had amnesia and was saved by some hobos at a railyard, and in exchange for saving his life, he trained them to be pro wrestlers. This muscular hobo army would be how he defeated HHH to get control of the company back. didn't foley have some amnesia angle back in his wcw days?
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May 4, 2024 23:53
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JPrime posted:didn't foley have some amnesia angle back in his wcw days? probably. that guy got knocked around real hard in ecw. So hard I forgot he was in wcw
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May 4, 2024 23:56
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Vince stumbles upon a hobo using an old ICO-PRO shirt as a rag on a stick to carry his few possessions, gets his mojo back.
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May 5, 2024 00:08
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And as a reward for their good deed, his hobo saviors get to split the gobbledy gooker. God bless us every one
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May 5, 2024 02:07
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Does vinces rear end grow arms and pull the cooked gobbledy gooker out of his rear end for the hobos
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May 5, 2024 02:15
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im saint germain posted:And as a reward for their good deed, his hobo saviors get to split the gobbledy gooker. God bless us every one wasn't that a guerrero in the suit?
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May 5, 2024 02:28
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Mumpy Puffinz posted:wasn't that a guerrero in the suit? Eddie's brother, Hector.
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May 5, 2024 02:32
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Grendels Dad posted:Wasn't that also around the time Benoit did the Thing? It's pretty easy to conflate several things here. the benoit murders happened right after and vince had to break kafyabe and rise from the dead to address it
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May 5, 2024 03:25
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Defiance Industries posted:According to legend, the original plan was that we would find out Vince had amnesia and was saved by some hobos at a railyard, and in exchange for saving his life, he trained them to be pro wrestlers. This muscular hobo army would be how he defeated HHH to get control of the company back. Idk why but this is slaying me We missed out on some stellar #content
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May 5, 2024 04:01
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Mumpy Puffinz posted:The Rock was a much better actor before he decided he had a brand He's more brand than man at this point. It feels like every other week he has something new he's shilling. There was years where every single appearance he made, he was shilling his lovely tequila (Fun fact: he wanted to have a booth for this tequila at the Black Adam premiere and fought Warner over it; they ended up winning and telling him no). He tried to push his lovely energy drink pretty hard for a while. The newest dumb Rock product takes the cake though. I swear this is somehow real: https://x.com/snacswell/status/1778555541951799362 https://twitter.com/ralphchiarella/status/1778835356160282755
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May 5, 2024 04:15
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get vince russo to call the rock a bald son of a bitch on live tv... lets see if he really is like the hulkster
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May 5, 2024 04:37
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Jamesman posted:Sorry to encourage more superhero movie chat, but another big takeaway from Man of Steel was the amount of destruction Superman caused. It wasn't just about killing Zod, but that the fight with Zod had immense collateral damage that Superman appeared to have no regard for. That's actually pretty much bullshit. It's a takeaway people have from online discussion but isn't what actually happens on screen. Superman spends the entire fight trying to mitigate damage and move Zod away from Metropolis. He gets punched through buildings, he doesn't punch through the buildings himself. He drags Zod through a building's facade at one point and that's the extent of damage he actually causes. The mass destruction in Metropolis was caused by the world engine/mothership, which Superman was fighting on the other side of the world at the time John Wick of Dogs fucked around with this message at 04:44 on May 5, 2024 |
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May 5, 2024 04:41
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Yeah, the Vince/Benoit timeline was kind of nuts to watch unfold. For the Vince stuff, the setup was that months earlier, the media was talking up the rivalry between Donald Trump and Rosie O'Donnell. Vince decided to put on one of the worst comedy matches ever with a guy dressed as Trump vs. a woman dressed as Rosie. A week later, Trump himself appeared on Raw to call the whole thing stupid, causing a feud between him and Vince. They decided to have a Hair vs. Hair match at WrestleMania 23 with each guy picking a proxy. Vince went with nigh-unstoppable monster Umaga and Trump went with Bobby Lashley, who was champion on the ECW brand, and otherwise had nothing much going on. Vince kept telling Lashley to back out, but he refused. WrestleMania happened, Lashley won, Vince got shaved bald, and Trump took one of the worst Stunners in history from guest referee Steve Austin. Vince antagonized Lashley and used Umaga as his muscle, ultimately becoming ECW Champion by winning a handicap match with Shane and Umaga against Lashley. He started carrying the belt while wearing a durag. Meanwhile, Chris Benoit was on SmackDown. He had just finished off his feud with MVP by dropping the United States Championship to him and had since become aimless. June 3, 2007: WWE One Night Stand 2007: Extreme Rules, a PPV where ever match is a gimmick match. Lashley overcomes the odds and interference by defeating Vince McMahon for the ECW Championship. Benoit was not booked for the show. June 4, 2007: WWE Raw. Vince is depicted as going insane due to his loss, compounded when Cena makes fun of him. Jonathan Coachman tells him that it's okay, because not only is the next week the WWE Draft, but it's Vince McMahon Appreciation Night. June 11, 2007: The rules of the Draft for this year are that two or three guys would have a match, representing their different shows. The winner would get a randomized draft pick for his show. Bobby Lashley has a match against Chris Benoit and wins. Afterwards, it's revealed that Benoit will be drafted to ECW, causing the two to shake hands. Later in the show, someone from Raw gets a draft pick and it turns out to be Lashley. Lashley is told that he has to vacate the ECW Championship, since it's a show-specific title. Meanwhile, the entire night is filled with people talking poo poo about Vince. Pre-taped videos, in-ring promos, etc. of people just calling him out on being the worst. The show ends with Vince coming out to say something, only to drop his microphone, walk to the back in a daze as the wrestlers just stare at him, and then he gets into his limo, which suddenly explodes. June 12, 2007: Benoit makes his ECW debut in a tag match with CM Punk against Elijah Burke and Marcus Cor Von, which ends in DQ. It is mentioned that starting next week, a four-man tournament will begin to crown a champion, featuring the men in that tag match. The finals will happen at the next PPV, Vengeance. Much of the show is dedicated to being serious about the Vince limo explosion, including the ten bell salute. June 15, 2007: In real life, Sherri Martel tragically dies of a drug overdose. June 18, 2007: Raw does a brief "In Memory" graphic about Martel, but continues the Vince story, which got criticism. Stephanie comes out to tearfully promo about her dead father, which is met with boos. Nobody wants to hear this poo poo. She says that next week will be a special three-hour edition of Raw (which wasn't the norm back then) and it will be a Celebration of Vince McMahon, featuring all three brands in action. June 19, 2007: The ECW tournament begins. Benoit defeats Elijah Burke. The main event has Punk go over Cor Von. Benoit enters the ring and the show ends with Benoit and Punk staring off to hype up this Sunday's Vengeance. June 24, 2007: WWE Vengeance happens. Benoit no-shows with a cryptic text message, which leads to commentators relaying it to the viewers as a family emergency. Instead, he is replaced by Johnny Nitro, who defeats Punk in front of a crowd chanting, "WE WANT BENOIT!" June 25, 2007: An hour or so before Raw is set to begin, news breaks of the Benoit family being discovered dead. The fans are sent home and the show begins with Vince in the ring, explaining the tragedy to the viewers at home, though the disturbing details have yet to be discovered at this point. The limo death story is finally ended abruptly and Vince instead says the night will be a celebration of Benoit's life and career. They basically spend the night showing stuff from his DVD and some of his biggest matches. This is the third memorial edition of Raw (Owen Hart and Eddie Guerrero are the other two) and it feels very different. There are talking head segments from friends and coworkers, but they aren't quite as emotional and broken up as they were for Owen and Eddie. They feel more... measured and awkward. William Regal's is especially telling, where he says Benoit was an excellent performer, but refuses to say anything else. As the show continues, the commentators become more and more distracted, as things are coming to light about the incident. The show ends with them playing Benoit's win at the end of WrestleMania 20 and a final image of him and Eddie Guerrero posing together with their world titles in hand. At this point, it all feels utterly chilling. June 26, 2007: ECW begins with a pre-taped message from Vince, explaining how Benoit's name will never be mentioned again, and instead they will dedicate this show to everyone affected from the tragedy.
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May 5, 2024 04:43
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Gavok posted:Meanwhile, the entire night is filled with people talking poo poo about Vince. Pre-taped videos, in-ring promos, etc. of people just calling him out on being the worst. The show ends with Vince coming out to say something, only to drop his microphone, walk to the back in a daze as the wrestlers just stare at him, and then he gets into his limo, which suddenly explodes. You forgot the best part.  Paul London was given no context for why he was told to stand backstage with the other wrestlers, and decided smiling would be an OK thing to do. It was not. He was buried and fired shortly after. Also, I SWEAR Vince eventually did another "death" angle later on. I wanna say it was during a Raw where he was giving money to people (I remember them doing live cold calls to people and it... didn't go very well. Have we talked about this in this thread yet?) and the titantron crushed him. Jamesman fucked around with this message at 05:02 on May 5, 2024 |
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May 5, 2024 04:59
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Gotta admit, "My hair would have loved this shampoo" is a pretty frank admission.
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May 5, 2024 05:11
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Vince McMahon's magical hobo arc is just making me picture Tequila Sunset getting involved in the world of wrestling, and lol. Bring in Measurehead while you're at it.David D. Davidson posted:He also venomusly denies being a self-made man, too. Like he credits his bodybuilding coach for bringing him to America, he credits the directors and producers of Conan and The Terminator for his big break and all helping him get to where he is today. And all that doubles as making the kind of connections that are hella important in Hollywood. It's polite AND pragmatic. And probably a bit alien to the high school esque drama queen attitude that apparently is part and parcel with wrestling.
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May 5, 2024 06:06
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Animal-Mother posted:Gotta admit, "My hair would have loved this shampoo" is a pretty frank admission. Quite frankly, it's something I'm amazed he put out there, given his modern ego.
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May 5, 2024 06:26
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Vandar posted:He's more brand than man at this point. It feels like every other week he has something new he's shilling. that's some real krusty the clown poo poo there
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May 5, 2024 06:45
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I admire the chutzpah.
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May 5, 2024 06:53
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Vandar posted:Quite frankly, it's something I'm amazed he put out there, given his modern ego. Eh, it's "safe." He's a handsome guy making the mildest joke about his looks.
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May 5, 2024 07:14
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I mean, Dwayne technically still has hair. But he decided he didn't like how it looked when it started receding, so he shaves his head. Better than say, Kevin Costner using the still very expensive and barely out of its crib CGI process to make his hair in Waterworld look thicker.Jamesman posted:Also, I SWEAR Vince eventually did another "death" angle later on. I wanna say it was during a Raw where he was giving money to people (I remember them doing live cold calls to people and it... didn't go very well. Have we talked about this in this thread yet?) and the titantron crushed him. You're correct. Vince decided to start a thing where he'd call random people (who at least entered their numbers, I think) and he'd award them money. Because...this would make people want to watch wrestling. Or something. It didn't go well. There were connection issues, people unable to be heard, and at one point Vince might have gotten outright Rick Rolled (or there was another connection issue and that was the machine message). You'd think he could just call an end to it, but NOOOOO, Vince needs a REASON, so abruptly the set semi self-destructed and collapsed, and Vince got 'hit' by a falling pillar, and as he was being taken away by the fake medical people he actually did some of the cool worked shoot stuff by yelling/crying out at Triple H "Paul! I can't feel my legs!" (Triple H's real name being Paul, if you need a reminder). Then it got forgotten and was never mentioned again, and Vince eventually turned back up and no one ever tried to solve why the stage abruptly fell apart that show. And so it goes on the shelf next to who drove the White Hummer in WCW, who was behind GTV in the WWE, who raised the briefcase at King of the Ring 2000 to keep Austin from winning the ladder match he was in, and who the Anonymous Raw General Manager was. I SAID, WE NEVER RESOLVED WHO THE ANONYMOUS RAW GENERAL MANAGER WAS. ARE WE CLEAR?
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May 5, 2024 07:42
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Cornwind Evil posted:
It was Sid's scissors!
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May 5, 2024 09:27
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Cornwind Evil posted:Then it got forgotten and was never mentioned again, and Vince eventually turned back up and no one ever tried to solve why the stage abruptly fell apart that show. And so it goes on the shelf next to who drove the White Hummer in WCW, who was behind GTV in the WWE, who raised the briefcase at King of the Ring 2000 to keep Austin from winning the ladder match he was in, and who the Anonymous Raw General Manager was. It was Bossman. It was explained on the episode of RAW immediately after KotR 2000.
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May 5, 2024 15:45
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Huh Jerry Lawler is out at the broadcast booth https://www.wrestlezone.com/news/1470460-report-jerry-lawler-no-longer-with-wwe
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May 7, 2024 03:41
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Seth Pecksniff posted:Huh Jerry Lawler is out at the broadcast booth he had a stroke last year not surprising he still has his legends contract
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May 7, 2024 03:47
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lawler vs kaufman... legendary
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May 7, 2024 03:49
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Speaking of legends, seems like the world agrees with my assessment that Richard Fliehr wants to die in the ring like it's possible Apollo Creed did, because he says he may have well have suffered an actual legit heart attack in his supposed final ever never doing another retirement match. Life, it's so arbitrary. Ric Flair destroys himself for decades via both wrestling and his uncontrollable living large, has a heart attack during his final match, doesn't even NOTICE. Windham Rotunda is half his age, catches COVID, and gets weakened enough that he has a heart attack himself, and dies. Not that I think Flair SHOULD have died, but it's just a matter of percentages, you know? Also, while double checking the exact date via Flair's wikipedia page, it lists him as STILL being an active wrestler despite the whole RIC FLAIR'S LAST MATCH thing. And one thought the late Terry Funk couldn't retire until the retirement that comes for all came for him. (He wrestled his last match nearly six years before his death, and his Wikipedia article says he 'retired' in 2017 for the very last time, so...yeah). Cornwind Evil fucked around with this message at 23:54 on May 10, 2024 |
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May 7, 2024 04:43
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ric flair had to go to 40 doctors until he found one that was incompetent and crooked enough to clear him to wrestle that match
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May 7, 2024 04:47
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Cornwind Evil posted:Speaking of legends, seems like the world agrees with my assessment that Richard Felair wants to die in the ring like it's possible Apollo Creed did, because he says he may have well have suffered an actual legit heart attack in his supposed final ever never doing another retirement match. terry funk is still wrestling in the after life
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May 7, 2024 05:12
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Terry Funk is Doomguy in Hell but needn't guns. (And he's in Heaven too)
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May 7, 2024 05:22
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Animal-Mother posted:Terry Funk is Doomguy in Hell but needn't guns. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AwCy53x3Xoo
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May 7, 2024 05:24
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Cornwind Evil posted:Speaking of legends, seems like the world agrees with my assessment that Richard Felair wants to die in the ring like it's possible Apollo Creed did, because he says he may have well have suffered an actual legit heart attack in his supposed final ever never doing another retirement match. I am convinced he will do another match and will actually die in the ring this time No way does he leave that money on the table
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May 7, 2024 06:36
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I think he stays retired unless Andrade and Charlotte get divorced before he dies. I think since he couldn't have his match with his son that he wanted, he wants to have his last match be with his son-in-law.
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May 7, 2024 06:49
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Has there ever been multiple deaths in the ring at once?
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May 7, 2024 07:27
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Animal-Mother posted:Terry Funk is Doomguy in Hell but needn't guns. Well yeah, he's got the chainsaw.
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May 7, 2024 09:39
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